Authors note- I really enjoyed writing this chapter. Took me a little longer to get it written but I hope it was worth the wait. Enjoy.
Song inspiration- Be Still- The Killers.
Song referenced- Stairway To Heaven- Led Zeppelin
Chapter 63
Mending
Harry stood against a concrete wall as he watched Sirius and Remus rummage through things in the cellar. Harry looked at the deep scratches in every wall. There were hundreds of them.
"Did you're parents lock you in here?" Harry asked softly.
They both turned and looked at Harry. Remus looked embarrassed. Sirius sent sad glances at Remus.
"Yes." Remus finally said softly.
Harry swallowed thickly as he looked around the room again and shook his head. The marks reminded him of the inside of his cupboard. When he'd been small, he would scratch and pound on the door to be let out.
"I'm sorry." Harry said softly, meeting Remus' eyes.
Remus nodded and gave him a sad smile.
"They locked me up a lot." Harry nearly whispered.
He wasn't sure why he was sharing but it felt important.
"They shouldn't have done that." Remus said, turning fully and looking at Harry, camping supplies forgotten.
Harry shrugged.
"I imagine it's for the same reason. They didn't know what else to do." Harry said quietly.
A flash of anger came over Remus' face and Harry lowered his head.
There was a sigh.
"Your relatives knew what they were doing was wrong. They had another child. They knew what else they could have done. I was kept here for my safety as much as everyone else's. Your relatives were just selfish and cruel." Remus said with a slight growl.
Harry nodded.
"Sorry." Harry said softly.
There was more shuffling, and Harry went back to watching them rummage through boxes.
"AHHH." Sirius shouted, jumping back, and spilling the box he'd been digging in.
Harry startled at the loud noise. He held up his hand ready to cast on whatever it was.
"I was sssleeeping." Hissed a snake, as it made its way over the pile of things on the floor.
"Sssorry. He didn't see you." Harry hissed, stepping closer to the snake.
The snake stopped and flicked its tongue in Harry's direction.
"Harry, stay away from it. It's poisonous." Sirius said stepping further away from the snake.
Harry rolled his eyes.
"Snakes are venomous, not poisonous." Harry said as he stepped closer.
"Ssspeaker, can you get me out of here?" The snake hissed.
Harry considered the snake for a moment. He didn't want to get bit.
"Will you bite me if I pick you up?" Harry hissed back.
"No, I've been trapped in here for far too long." The snake hissed back.
Harry nodded and looked around the cellar. He noticed a little bit of sunlight shining close to the ceiling. He'd make sure it got blocked up to keep anymore snakes from coming in.
Harry kneeled and put his hands on the ground, palms up.
The snake moved closer and flicked his tongue out and touched the end of Harry's fingers.
Harry smiled.
"Come on. I'm ssssure we can find sssomething for you to eat. Don't attack my cat though." Harry said as the snake slithered onto his hands.
He stood with the adder in his hands and caught sight of the alarmed looks on Sirius and Remus' faces. He blushed and looked away from them. He hated being seen as a freak. He knew Speaking parseltongue was freaky though. Even in the wizarding world.
Harry sighed as he climbed the stairs and walked away from the cellar and out behind the cottage.
"Would you prefer to be put in the grasssss or the woodsss?" Harry hissed.
"Woodsss." The snake hissed back.
Harry nodded and headed to the edge of the clearing. The woods were closer behind the house.
Harry smiled as he saw a mouse scamper away from the first tree.
"There's a moussse just over there." Harry hissed as he kneeled and gently set the snake in the tall grass.
"Thanksss." The snake hissed as he began to squirm towards his prey.
Harry smiled softly as he stood.
When he turned back the smile melted away from his face as he saw Remus and Sirius standing near the cellar doors. Neither of them looked pleased.
Harry sighed and made his way back. He wrapped his arms around his stomach and lowered his head.
He wondered if he was going to be in trouble. They probably weren't going camping now.
Harry stopped several feet away from them both. He could almost feel his uncles' hands around his neck when he'd accidentally let the snake loose at the zoo.
"Sorry." Harry whispered.
Neither of them said anything for a moment and Harry peaked up through his fringe.
Remus looked sad and Sirius looked unsure.
"You're not in trouble Harry." Remus said softly, stepping closer.
Harry took a step back.
Remus got a pained look on his face. Then to Harry's surprise Remus sat down on the ground. Harry furrowed his brows. Sirius followed Remus and also sat down.
Harry looked back and forth between them in confusion.
Harry took a deep breath and also sat down. He reached out and touched the grass as he waited for whatever they were going to say.
"Harry, can you tell me what your thinking right now?" Remus said softly.
Harry blushed and kept his head down. Sometimes his aunt would make him call himself a freak. She would ask him why he did something. She didn't want an answer. The answer was that he was a freak.
He didn't want to do that, so he just shook his head.
"Okay, can you tell me how your feeling?" Remus asked.
Harry sighed. He felt resigned. He'd ruined what was supposed to be a fun day. It was supposed to be the first day of their camping trip. He felt guilty.
"Guilty." Harry whispered softly.
Harry peaked through his hair again and saw confusion on both of their faces.
"What do you feel guilty about?" Remus asked calmly.
Harry sighed deeply.
"Ruining our day. I…I wanted to go camping. I'm sorry." Harry answered.
"Harry, you haven't ruined anything. We're all still going camping. It was startling to come across the snake, but it has only delayed us a little. You didn't put the snake in there, you have nothing to feel guilty about." Remus said calmly.
Harry shrugged.
He bit his lip and considered.
"I did something freaky." Harry admitted quietly.
Remus sighed.
"Harry, you did something magical, not freaky. You are a wizard, and you have an incredibly special talent. That's not a bad thing. You are an extraordinarily talented wizard, Harry. Do you think your other abilities are 'Freaky'?" Remus asked.
Harry shrugged. They weren't as bad, but they still made him different, and he didn't like that. He just wanted to be normal.
"You know pup, Remus and I both have skills that make us a little different. That isn't a bad thing. Regardless of how others might view those skills." Sirius said.
Harry looked up at them curiously.
Sirius gave him a half smile.
"I was born a natural Occlumens. It's pretty rare. Most people have to study it for years. Naturals are considered…well considered deceitful. My mother often accused me of being heartless, which was rich coming from her. I just refused to show them my emotions. I learned through books and cruel tutors how to control it. How to feel my feelings and how to hide them." Sirius admitted.
Harry considered that for a moment. He knew natural Occlumens was one of his abilities. He thought about growing up in that numb haze. He'd told Snape he'd been numb living there, and it was true.
Harry sighed and nodded.
Harry noticed Remus looking at Sirius sadly. There was also a little bit of surprise. Harry wondered if Remus hadn't known before.
"I'm a natural Legilimens. It's a particularly useful skill, especially in mind healing. It's also a skill that can be taught, but takes years of training to not cause damage to others. Natural Legilimens are considered manipulative. This isn't accurate, but children who aren't trained become very perceptive to the feelings and thoughts of those around them. They don't do it on purpose, but until they are trained, they don't know how to turn it off. This often leads to children doing what they know people want them to do because they actually know, and this can seem manipulative. Though I would argue not being clear with a child is far more manipulative." Remus said.
Harry blushed and looked back down at his hands as he picked at the grass.
"Not all skills are seen so negatively. Your mother had aura sight. It's very sought after for several careers. Aurors, healers, curse breakers." Remus added.
Harry nodded. It was an amazing ability to see magic.
"Did my dad have anything like that?" Harry asked quietly.
There was no response.
Harry looked up and studied them. Neither of them was looking at him. Remus was looking down at his clasped hands and Sirius was staring out at the woods beyond Harry.
"Er…never mind." Harry mumbled.
He always felt strange bringing up his parents. As painful as it had been to grow up without them, he'd never really had a chance to know them. Sirius and Remus knew them, had been close to them.
"No…I just…" Sirius sighed and rubbed his face.
"It's going to sound bad, and we don't want to give you the wrong impression." Remus said softly.
Harry frowned.
Sirius sighed and ran his hand through his hair.
"Your dad was a parselmouth too." Sirius said.
Harry felt his stomach sink.
"Harry, I want you to stop and listen to me before your mind starts lying to you. Okay?" Remus said firmly.
Harry swallowed and looked up and met Remus' eyes.
"Your dad didn't know until he was nearly nineteen. He'd never been around snakes before. We ran across one on a mission. We… we were hiding, and James was so jumpy. He finally asked if I could hear someone talking. I couldn't. Which didn't make sense to either of us. I could always hear things before the others." Remus started.
"I'd gone closer to the house we were watching. Most people dismiss a dog sniffing around garbage. When I came back your dad was shaking. He thought we were being watched. Remus said he couldn't hear the voice James was hearing and I shifted back into padfoot to see if I could sniff them out. Thought maybe they were under a disillusionment charm or something. I didn't find a person. I found a snake stalking a vole in the bushes." Sirius said biting his lip.
"Your dad swore that he didn't know. Swore up and down that he wasn't dark. Back then trust was everything. Things were bad. We were already having trust issues." Sirius said sadly as he looked over at Remus.
"We talked about it later. We promised not to tell anyone. It's kind of a secret in the pureblood families that more parselmouths exist then anyone talks about. Most people just don't talk about it. James wasn't ashamed of it. He was afraid." Sirius said with a sigh.
Harry weighed everything that they'd said.
"What do you guys think?" Harry asked softly.
There was another moment of silence. Harry felt his stomach souring. His dad had been a parselmouth. It just didn't seem right. He knew they were telling the truth, but it still seemed shocking.
"I'm a werewolf Harry. It'd be rather hypocritical of me to think someone was dark just because of something they have no control over." Remus said with a slight smirk.
Sirius nodded.
"I'm a Black. I've been labeled dark my whole life." Sirius said with a shrug.
Harry smiled softly, he supposed they had a point.
"Now, if we want to go camping, I suggest we get off the ground and get to it." Remus said, gently pulling himself from the ground and dusting off his pants.
Harry nodded and stood. He held out his hand for Sirius who smiled at him.
"Old bones don't do so well on the ground." Sirius joked as Harry pulled him to his feet.
Harry never said anything, but he'd noticed Remus helping Sirius up every night after their talks.
"Now, we have most of our stuff pulled out. We just need the tent." Remus said heading back into the cellar.
Harry stomach twisted a little. Most of these supplies were muggle. Muggle tents were small though and he was anxious about being in such a small space. He also felt uncomfortable being that close to others while he slept. On the other hand, if they were looking for a wizarding tent, he thought it would bring up memories of the world cup and he didn't want to think about that at all.
"Umm…." Harry mumbled as he stepped back into the cellar.
Remus turned and looked at Harry.
"What is it?" Remus asked.
Harry blushed a little. It was ridiculous that a tent was causing this much anxiety.
Harry shook his head. He'd make it through.
"It's okay. What's going on?" Remus asked.
"Could we…Er…Can we just sleep under the stars?" Harry asked.
Remus' face lit up and he smiled widely.
"Sounds great. What do you think Pads?" Remus said, turning to Sirius.
Sirius smiled.
"Sounds good to me." Sirius said as he stooped down and collected the camp chairs he'd already dug out.
Harry smiled and nodded.
Remus sat down in his camp chair and cast an Incendio at the pile of wood Sirius had stacked up. He sighed as he sat back in his chair and smiled at Sirius.
"This was a good plan." Remus said.
"Yeah, he seems happier out here." Sirius agreed softly, as he looked across the small clearing. It was the same place they'd spent the last full moon.
Harry was wandering around the trees, but he had a slight smile at the corner of his mouth. He looked content.
"Yes, I think today has gone pretty well, other than that business with the snake." Remus said.
Sirius nodded and sighed.
"You sure he's going to be okay without the wards?" Sirius asked.
Remus sighed. He'd tossed and turned all night thinking about it. They couldn't keep him in a bubble though.
"I don't know Pads. I hope so. We have to have some faith that he'll be okay. He's been more open with us this week. Talking to us. Talking to me during sessions. I know there's still a lot of work to do but we're going to have to trust him to come to us. He won't have the safety wards when he goes to Severus this weekend." Remus said.
Sirius nodded.
They sat quietly by the fire, which was almost a little too warm at this point in the day, watching Harry. Every once in a while, a little black fluff would become visible trailing behind him. Edgar seemed unwilling to let Harry leave without him. He'd darted out the door as they had left and climbed Harry before settling on his shoulders.
Harry had laughed and pet the kitten's head before looking to Remus to guide them into the woods.
"Why don't you go spend some time with him." Remus suggested.
Sirius sent him a hesitant look. Remus understood. After the whole drinking incident Sirius had been hesitant to spend time alone with Harry.
"You're not going to break him, Siri. Maybe you can go for a run with him. I know that would make you happy." Remus smiled softly.
Sirius smiled back and nodded. Sirius had been so proud to hear that Harry had achieved his Animagus form. Harry still hadn't shifted in front of them, and they knew that part of it was because of what had happened with the Bones. They didn't want him to fear that form though. It may be necessary at some point.
"How do I do that?" Sirius sighed.
Remus smirked.
"The same way you get Moony to play. Just be yourself." Remus laughed.
Sirius chuckled and nodded.
"Do you want to come with?" Sirius asked.
Remus shook his head. Sirius and Harry needed some time to reconnect.
"Nah, I'm going to read for a while." Remus said, pulling a book from his bag.
"Alright, we'll be back before dark, and I'll help you make dinner." Sirius said standing from his chair.
Remus nodded. They'd talked about letting Harry just enjoy the trip. Let him just be a kid. Harry had been doing a lot of work and they hoped in a new environment he might just relax. Though Remus worried about how Harry would handle getting dirty out in the woods. He still didn't fully understand all of the aspects of Harry's compulsive cleaning. If it became too much for Harry, it wasn't a far walk back to the cottage.
"Have fun." Remus said with a smile.
Sirius winked at him before shifting and loping across the clearing headed for Harry.
Harry took a deep breath and closed his eyes. It was so nice to just be outside, the fresh air smelt wonderful and the little rays of sun filtering through the trees felt good.
Harry smiled softly at the sound of Sirius and Remus laughing softly on the far side of the clearing. They seemed like they needed this as much as he did.
He'd been studying the plants as he walked. There were lots of plants here that could be used in potions. Part of him wished he could stay longer. Collect some ingredients and work on some potions. Despite his work on potions this year, he'd yet to brew with his new understanding. He didn't bother in the potions class. One of the Slytherin's always threw something in his potion, or Snape would just vanish it.
He sighed. he'd be seeing Snape again soon. He wondered how that was going to go. He hoped to apologize to him.
Harry was startled at something bumping into his hip. He looked down and smiled seeing Padfoot. Harry lowered his hand and rubbed behind his ears.
"You know if you'd approached me like this the first time I saw you, I'd probably have adopted you." Harry chuckled.
Padfoot made a chuffing noise and Harry laughed.
"The forest here is beautiful." Harry said wistfully.
They walked quietly side by side. Edgar had slunk back to camp. Harry suspected that he was tired of all of the aimless wandering. Harry felt confident walking further from camp now that Sirius was with him. There hadn't been any specific rules for him, but he knew he was supposed to stay in sight.
Harry bent down and picked up a stick before waving it a little and throwing it. To Harry's surprise Padfoot took off after it and brought it back. Harry laughed hard.
Harry took the stick and threw it again. Sirius really did seem to enjoy being a dog more than a human. Harry understood that. Being a dog was simple. Eat, play, sleep. The days he had spent as Akela had been stressful, but prowling the London streets had been less stressful in that form than they would have been walking around as a scrawny teen.
Harry began to feel a tightness in his chest. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his inhaler. This was the second time he'd needed it since he'd walked into the woods.
Padfoot whined as he set down the stick near Harry's feet.
"I'm fine." Harry said with a half-smile shoving his inhaler back in his pocket.
He'd been thankful when Remus had given it back, just as they'd left the house. He had not wanted Harry to be without it.
Harry grabbed the stick and threw it again. Padfoot barked and took off into the trees again. This continued for a while until Padfoot came back but wouldn't drop the stick. Harry raised an eyebrow. Padfoot dropped down onto his front legs with his ears perked forward and his tail wagging wildly behind him.
"What?" Harry asked in a half laugh.
Padfoot barked and jumped back before dropping again.
Harry considered the dog for a moment. Clearly, he wanted to play. Was he expecting Harry to chase him? Padfoot could easily outrun him.
Harry bit his lip as he considered shifting. Playing with Padfoot sounded fun. He also trusted him to be there if he wasn't okay. With a deep breath he thought about shifting and found himself on all fours. His body felt shaky.
"Safe." Padfoot said as he approached and nosed at Harry a little.
Harry was surprised to understand him. He'd never interacted with another Animagus while transformed.
Harry nodded. He was okay, this was okay.
Padfoot circled him while sniffing at him. Harry thought it would bother him in human form but as an animal it seemed natural. When Padfoot had stopped Harry carefully began to circle and sniff at him.
Familiar, safety, pack, home.
Harry felt a new wave of energy at being able to sense that from Padfoot.
Harry yipped and pranced into the woods a little. Padfoot barked back and the two began to run deeper into the forest. Harry could feel the crunch of leaves and twigs under his feet. The wind whipped through his fur as he ran faster.
He was taller and broader than Padfoot, but he probably still weighed less. Sirius had gained a lot of weight back since his time in Azkaban. Harry on the other hand was gangly like a puppy and still showing a lot of signs of his starvation, though the calming draughts at meals had been helping.
Padfoot barked and drew his attention.
"Follow." Padfoot chuffed and headed in a slightly different direction.
Harry followed at a slower pace. They were walking at more of a trot now. Harry could feel his lungs burning even in this form. He'd need to use his inhaler again if he didn't slow down.
The trees began to thin, and Harry stopped as they came out at a cliff overlooking a large lake. The sun was beginning to set, and the sky was full of purple, pink, and orange. All the colors reflected back off the water. It was beautiful. A small Island stood in the middle of the lake. The dark trees stood peacefully in the dying light.
Harry sat and threw his head back and let out a low howl. To Harry's surprise Padfoot sat next to him and howled. Harry hadn't expected it. Although he supposed after spending so much time with a wolf, Padfoot had picked up howling.
There was a pop and Harry looked up to see Sirius standing next to him. Sirius walked to a large boulder and sat down. Harry followed cautiously.
"Your form is beautiful Harry. I can't tell you how proud I am. Animagus is difficult to obtain." Sirius said with a sigh as he looked out across the lake.
"I'm so proud of you Harry. You're an amazing kid. Smart and talented and kind. I'm so sorry I haven't been here more for you." Sirius continued.
Harry whined and bumped Sirius hand with his nose.
He loved Sirius and it made his heart warm to know what Sirius thought of him.
"I love you." Sirius whispered, running his hand up Harry's face and scratching behind his ears.
In this form the touch didn't feel so horrible. He leaned into Sirius hand. He didn't want to shift back. Feeling Happy was strange but he was enjoying this little taste of it.
They sat quietly as the sun set.
"We better get back before Moony starts to worry. I swear he's as bad as Molly sometimes." Sirius said with a chuckle.
Harry huffed and stepped back as Sirius stood.
Harry lowered himself like Sirius had done earlier and barked.
Sirius smirked.
"You want to race back?" Sirius asked.
Harry barked again and let his fluffy tail swish back and forth.
Sirius popped back into Padfoot and darted into the tree line. Harry yipped as he followed.
Remus sighed as he finished making dinner. The sun had set, and Sirius and Harry hadn't returned yet. He had decided half an hour ago that he was just going to start dinner to keep himself busy. He thought he'd heard howling a while ago.
Remus set another log on the fire. He pulled his jacket around him tighter and sat down in his chair. The warm weather had melted away with the glow of the sun and a breeze had begun to pick up.
A bark alerted him to their return. Remus turned and smiled as he saw Padfoot running across the clearing. His breath caught at the sight of another dog at the edge of the tree line. Remus could see how big he was. His green eyes nearly glowed in the low light.
Remus bit his lip and looked away. Harry was obviously hesitant to join them.
"Your dinner's going cold." Remus commented as Padfoot walked up and laid his heavy head in Remus lap.
Remus laughed at the puppy eyes.
"You've left our pup in the woods." Remus whispered softly, letting his eyes flick to the edge of the trees.
He could still see Harry lingering there.
Padfoot whined and looked over to the trees.
"Just make a plate and come eat with me. He'll come." Remus said, gently pushing Padfoot away as he stood up.
Sirius popped back into human form and walked over to the table Remus had set up.
"Mmm, this looks delicious, love. Thank you." Sirius said happily before he leaned over and gave Remus a soft kiss on the cheek.
Remus blushed slightly and smiled. He loved the affection that Sirius showered him in. It had never mattered how Remus had seen himself. Sirius seemed to think Remus had hung the moon himself. Even when they'd been friends in school Sirius had never hesitated to throw his arm over Remus' shoulders, or give him a hug when he was having a hard day. It meant the world to him.
"What?" Sirius asked softly as he made his plate.
Remus looked into Sirius grey eyes and smiled more.
"I love you." Remus said.
Sirius smiled back.
"I love you too." Sirius said softly.
"Were things okay here while we were gone?" Sirius asked a moment later.
Remus nodded.
"Finished my book. It wasn't as good as I'd hoped." Remus said with a shrug.
"Edgar decided my lap was a good place to take a nap. I started to drift off myself. Figured I'd start dinner before I fell asleep." Remus answered.
A meow from the middle of the clearing drew their attention. Edgar was marching back to their little camp with his tail held high. Behind him Harry followed in his Animagus form. His head was down but he continued to walk closer.
Remus turned back and finished making his plate before walking back over to his chair. He didn't want to draw to much attention to Harry. He'd learned this last week, that Harry was much more likely to do what he actually wanted to do if he wasn't being watched. Too much attention on him often led to panic or even shutting down.
Sirius sat down next to Remus and Edgar continued to meow like he was telling Harry off for leaving.
Harry stopped and just watched them from next to the fire as Edgar maneuvered through Remus and Sirius' chairs.
"Dinners done. You should make a plate." Remus said softly, looking up at Harry.
Harry whined a little and tipped his head to the side which only made Remus think of Padfoot.
Remus had noticed that Harry actually had several of both of their mannerisms. He wasn't sure if they were things he just did or if he'd picked them up spending time with them.
Harry walked closer to Remus and sat at his feet before looking up at him.
Remus smiled softly.
"It's very impressive Harry. Thank you for letting me see you." Remus said softly before holding out his hand but not reaching for Harry.
Remus smiled widely as Harry nosed his hand and seemed to lean into the gentle pet.
Remus couldn't describe how happy it made him to see Harry seek any kind of physical affection. Remus rubbed behind Harry's ear's before dropping his hand.
"Dinner time." Remus said softly.
Harry stood and walked to the table before popping back into human form. Remus smiled when he noticed Harry's hair was long again. Harry had shifted back to base form. Remus vaguely wondered if it had been on purpose or if when he shifted, he always shifted back in that form.
Again, Remus chose not to draw attention to it. He was curious if Harry would choose to stay in that form if no one acknowledged it as a change.
"Where did you two get off to?" Remus asked Sirius.
"Took him up to the lake. We watched the sunset up there and then headed back." Sirius answered.
Remus smiled. He and Sirius had walked up there the day that Severus had been brewing the new werewolf potion.
Harry took his seat next to the fire.
"What did you think of the lake?" Remus asked.
Harry smiled a little.
"It's lovely." Harry said softly.
Remus nodded.
"Would you like to go back tomorrow? Perhaps we could go swimming." Remus asked.
Harry bit his lip and shrugged.
"We could teach you to swim, if you'd like." Remus suggested.
He continued to pick at his plate and pop a crisp in his mouth as if it didn't matter either way. In reality he was hoping Harry would voice his opinion.
"I'd like that." Harry answered quietly.
Harry lay tucked into his sleeping bag. His arms folded behind his head and his eyes dancing between the glittering stars.
Today had been better then he had expected. It hadn't been without issue, but it had been nice.
Edgar lay purring happily on his chest and he smiled at the feeling. He was surprised to find that he was actually looking forward to tomorrow. A feeling that he hadn't felt much this summer.
He breathed out a deep breath. He knew this was only a calm in the storm. Tomorrow would come and the next day and the one after. The war was continuing to rage beyond the serenity of the quiet life they were living. He would be back in the thick of things soon enough.
His eyes flicked over to the lump of fur just beyond the other side of the fire. Sirius and Remus had laid out their sleeping bags in a sort of mat and both transformed to sleep on top of it. Harry smiled softly. They looked content snuggled together.
Harry glanced around the edge of the clearing and waved his hand. Remus had put up some wards before they'd gone to bed. He trusted they were safe but for his own peace of mind he added his own. They were still in the property wards, so no one should be able to enter, but nothing seemed wholly safe these days.
He lowered his hand onto Edgar and rubbed gently at his fur while he looked at the stars again. His eyes soon slipped shut and he fell into a restful sleep.
Harry wheezed as he followed Remus and Sirius through the woods. He'd slept better last night then he thought he ever had. He'd been in a wonderful mood when he'd woken up, which seemed to have left Sirius and Remus in equally good moods. He had insisted on helping them make breakfast and once the fire had been doused, they'd gathered what they needed for the day and had set off on a hike.
Edgar was in a transfigured bag on his back which he seemed to be enjoying. He'd been hesitant to get in at first, but Harry hadn't wanted to wear him as a scarf on their hike, and knew the little fuzzball wouldn't allow them to leave him behind.
Harry bit his lip as he shoved his hand in his pocket to retrieve his inhaler. He stopped walking for a moment and closed his eyes trying to get his breath back.
"Harry?" Remus said, concern thick in his voice.
Harry groaned. They had been more relaxed since they'd been out here. He didn't want them to start worrying again.
"I'm fine." Harry said, burying the inhaler back in his pocket.
"Do you want to stop for a little? We can take a break." Remus said.
Harry's eyes danced over both of their worried faces, and he shook his head.
"Do you think a slower pace would help?" Sirius asked.
Harry sighed. He should just be honest with them. Voicing concerns had never really been an option, but he thought perhaps he knew them well enough to know they wouldn't get upset.
He looked at the ground and counted at least three plants he was allergic to.
"It's not the pace, it's the pollen." Harry mumbled.
They both stepped closer.
"What?" Remus asked softly.
Harry bit his lip before looking back up at them.
"I…Er…It's not the pace. It's the pollen. I…um…I'm allergic to a lot of these plants." Harry said.
He could feel his palms getting sweaty and he tried to focus on their reaction and not his mind's racing thoughts about being a burden.
Remus looked around and brought his hand to his face with a sigh.
"I'm so sorry. I…" Remus sighed.
"Do you want to go back to the cottage?" Remus asked.
Harry shook his head. He was enjoying being out here.
"It's okay. I'm okay." Harry said earnestly, not wanting to ruin the day they were having.
Remus sighed and looked to Sirius.
Remus pulled his wand from his pocket and Harry took a half step back.
"Harry." Remus called.
Harry looked at him though his heart was pounding a little hard.
"I won't ever hurt you." Remus said sincerely.
Harry took a deep breath and nodded.
"I'd like to cast a charm around you. It's kind of like an air freshening charm, but it should hopefully follow you. It won't be perfect but hopefully it will limit how much exposure you're getting. Would that be all right?" Remus asked.
Harry considered for a moment and nodded. Remus cast the charm and Harry took some deep breaths. It seemed to be helping some.
"Thank you." Harry said softly.
Remus smiled and nodded, and they continued on their walk.
Harry smiled as they came to the lake. Harry looked around the edge of the lake and spotted where he and Sirius had sat last night. This area was much closer to a beach.
Harry set his bag down and let Edgar out before setting out a dish of water for him, and retrieving his own water bottle.
They rested on the beach for a while, but the sun was baking down on them. Harry cast a cooling charm over himself, but it was only doing so much. He pulled a hair tie from his bag and twisted his hair up off of his neck. It was nice to be back in base form. It had been a gamble last night, but Remus and Sirius hadn't said anything.
"Do you want to get in the water?" Sirius asked.
Harry shrugged.
He'd been interested last night but now it seemed a little daunting. His experiences with water hadn't been very good.
"Sirius is going to teach me how to swim in my Animagus form. I've never been in water in that form. Would you like to try that?" Remus asked, taking a long drink of his water.
Harry considered that for a moment and nodded. That seemed reasonable.
Sirius smiled and nodded.
Suddenly Sirius shifted and was jumping around barking at them. Harry smirked and looked over at Remus. Remus smiled fondly at Sirius.
Harry's heart swelled at the love he could see in Remus' face. He didn't think he would ever have that. There wasn't much point now. He was destined to die, but it warmed him to see the love between them.
He shook the dark thoughts from his mind and stood. He dusted the sand from his clothes and shifted.
The smell of the water and the trees was amazing in this form. Harry sniffed around the beach. He whined when he caught the scent of something, another animal he thought. Probably a deer or something that had been to the lake for water earlier in the day.
Harry continued his sniffing of the beach. Splashing and yipping from behind him drew his attention.
Padfoot and Moony were both in the water. They were playing in the shallows. Harry's heart sang in familiarity. The feeling he'd felt last night with Padfoot was intensified with seeing them together. Family. Pack.
Harry ran towards them but hesitated at the waters edge. He'd read somewhere that wolves were good swimmers. Remus would probably pick up swimming like this easily. Padfoot was obviously a good swimmer. He'd swam to shore from Azkaban, and that was when he was thin and frail from his stay in the prison.
"Join." Yipped Moony.
They had stopped their splashing and were both just watching him. He stepped into the water and enjoyed the cool feeling on his paws compared to the hot sand and rocks of the beach. He walked deeper until he was close to them.
Harry slowly approached Moony and like last night with Padfoot sniffed him out. When they were face to face again Harry leaned into his chest in what was as close to a hug as he could give in this form. Moony rubbed his face on Harry's head before they pulled apart.
"Play." Harry chuffed and splashed the water a little.
Moony looked to Padfoot before both started to chase Harry. Harry charged down the beach in the shallow water. This was nearly as fun as flying.
They ran and splashed for quite a while before Sirius barked to get their attention. He walked deeper into the water. He was up to his chest when he began to kick his feet. There was splashing around him, but it was obvious that he was swimming. Moony followed and was obviously a more graceful swimmer.
Harry followed slowly and as he felt his legs begin to struggle to touch the bottom he began to kick the water. He was splashing a lot more then either of the others, but he was doing it.
Harry barked happily as he swam around. He didn't think he'd ever been so happy about an accomplishment. He wasn't sinking.
Harry tipped his head back and howled.
Harry's legs were beginning to tire, and he swam back towards the beach. He collapsed on the warm sand and closed his eyes. Swimming had been a lot of fun, but he felt he needed a nap now.
His eyes flew open at a nudge against his nose.
Moony looked into his eyes.
"Okay." Moony whined.
"Tired." Harry huffed and let his eyes fall back closed.
The soft sound of Remus and Sirius shifting back and the sound of their shoes crunching on the sand lolled Harry to sleep. He'd never felt comfortable sleeping around people, but these were his people. His pack. Pack was safe.
"He's exhausted." Remus said as he gathered their things from the beach.
Sirius nodded. He'd enjoyed spending time with both of them like this. He hadn't felt this good since the full moon's back at Hogwarts.
"He did a lot of swimming." Sirius commented as he sat down next to a sleeping Harry.
He wanted to reach out and pet him, but knew Harry was still hesitant about touch, even in this form. It seemed easier for him to accept but there was still wariness.
"Do you still want to give him his gifts tonight?" Remus asked, sitting next to him.
Sirius nodded. They'd held off on giving Harry his birthday gifts. They'd been worried about it being overwhelming for him.
"We can't keep them. He deserves to have a birthday." Sirius said.
He thought while they were camping might be best. Certainly, before they sent him back to Snapes.
"We will need to leave camp for a few hours tomorrow. Harry has his check up with the doctor for his asthma. I don't think his medication is enough. He was really struggling earlier." Remus replied.
"Do they make medication for allergies?" Sirius asked.
Remus nodded.
"Yes, there are some muggle options. I'll talk to Poppy as well. They need to be better controlled or he won't be able to fly at school this year. It's just too dangerous." Remus said.
Sirius sighed. He knew how much Harry loved flying and playing quidditch.
"We shouldn't let him sleep too long. We're outside the wards here." Remus commented, as he looked around.
Sirius also looked around but there wasn't anything. The sky was blue and heavy white clouds hung low. The trees rustled softly in the wind. It was perfect. He wished they didn't have to go back. Back to the cottage. Back to the wizarding world. He wished they could just stay here in this peace.
Sirius sighed again.
"What are you thinking?" Remus asked softly as he reached out and took Sirius hand.
Sirius shook his head.
"Just wishing this was our life." Sirius said, laying his head on Remus' shoulder.
Remus hummed softly and laid his head against Sirius'.
They sat quietly watching the beautiful day. Soaking in every peaceful moment.
Harry chewed his lip as he sketched. They had eaten dinner and were now just sitting quietly by the fire. He had enjoyed the day immensely. Swimming had been brilliant, and he hoped that they could return tomorrow.
"Harry." Remus called.
Harry looked up from his sketch of the lake to find Remus and Sirius both watching him. He blushed slightly and closed his sketchbook.
"We've been a little hesitant to acknowledge your birthday, but we don't want you to think we forgot about it." Remus started.
Harry swallowed. He hadn't thought much about his birthday.
"We have some things for you. From us, but also from your friends." Remus said. His voice was very neutral.
Harry knew that Remus was trying to gauge his reaction. Despite the corresponding day, his suicide attempt had nothing to do with his birthday. He still hadn't given them a lot about that day though. He knew he'd need to lie. He wouldn't tell them about the Horcruxes or about him needing to die.
He also didn't want to make it seem like it was any of their fault. It hadn't been and he wouldn't let them think that.
Harry just nodded and smiled softly.
Remus smiled back and reached for a box near his feet.
"This box is pretty full." Remus said, picking the box up and walking over to Harry.
Harry smiled as he looked into the box. It had been so strange to start receiving gifts when he'd come to the Wixen world. His stomach squirmed a little. The strange mix of emotions. Gratitude and guilt. He was thankful for the thought and at the same time felt undeserving.
Harry swallowed thickly as he pulled the first gift from the box.
A box full of new products from Fred and George. The note said at least one of the prank products was to be used on Ron. Harry laughed as he set the box next to his chair.
"Joke shop stuff, from Fred and George." Harry said.
Sirius laughed and Remus smiled.
The next was from Ginny, a quidditch magazine with her favorite player on the cover. There was a brief note scrawled on parchment between two pages.
'I'm trying out this year. We should try this, it looks wicked.'
Harry looked at the page and smirked. He wondered what quidditch would look like this year. The twins were gone as was Angelina, who had been captain last year.
Harry sighed. He'd been banned for life last year. There would be no quidditch for him this year.
Harry turned the magazine for Sirius and Remus to see.
"From Ginny." Harry said before setting it on top of the box from the twins.
Harry smiled as he opened his gift from Hermione. It was a lovely leather-bound journal with a self-inking quill.
'Charmed for secrecy. Hope to see you soon. – Hermione'
Harry smiled again and set it with the other gifts.
He got candy from Ron, Neville had sent him a Herbology book, and Luna had given him a necklace with a strange wolf pendant. The note had said it was to keep him safe. Harry had put it on and placed the other gifts with the ones he'd already opened.
He was surprised to see that there was still so much in the box.
He reached in and grabbed one with similar wrapping to the one from Ron.
It was a box of hand pies with a stasis spell on them from Mr. and Mrs. Weasley.
He smiled and held the box out for Remus and Sirius.
"Mrs. Weasley sent pies." Harry said happily. He loved her baking.
They each plucked one out and said thanks. Harry smiled as he took one and nibbled at it as he pulled out the next gift.
Harry's brows creased as he realized this one was from Julie Baker. He wondered how that was possible. He unwrapped the small box and smiled. It was a blue collar with a small tag that said 'Edgar' on it.
Harry clicked his tongue a few times, and Edgar ran over and lunged at his lap. He managed to send the wrapping from the gift to the ground, as well as his half-eaten pie.
Harry shook his head.
"Look what Julie got you." Harry whispered softly as he attached the collar. Harry raised his hand and spelled it only to be removed by him. He cast a no snag charm on it, that he'd read about in a dueling book. It was meant for dueling robes, so that no one could grab your robes and loose debris couldn't catch on them and trap you. It would work well for this as well though, he thought.
Edgar puffed up and looked right in his eyes, showing off the shiny little tag with his name.
Harry laughed and rubbed his ears before setting him on his shoulder to get comfortable.
Harry quickly discovered that he had gifts from several people from Cokeworth. Noah from the art supply shop had gifted him a box of colored pencils and another sketchbook. Harry was excited to add some color to his work. His picture of the lake would look wonderful in color.
Kelly had gotten him a book on Origami. Her note had poked fun at his efficient laundry folding. Maggie had given him a stationery set and a note that said to stay in touch.
Harry was surprised by the gift from Jack and Jane. It was a new Gameboy. The note was from Jane.
'You're such a diligent worker, you deserve to do some of those fun kid things. My grandson says this is the best for that. Come see us again. – Jane& Jack'
Harry felt tears forming in his eyes. It was an expensive gift that he didn't feel he deserved. He took some deep breaths and set the box down gently. He didn't show it to Sirius and Remus. He wasn't sure they'd understand what it was anyway.
The next box was from The Harding's.
'It's used, but I hope you can get some use out of it. We tried to guess at the tapes. If you already have them or don't like them, we'd be happy to swap them out for you.'
This one was signed the Harding's and then there was a puppy paw smudge at the bottom that said Max.
Harry opened the box and was surprised to find a Walkman with headphones. Under it were cassette tapes. His eyes roamed over them. They were all bands that matched the shirts he'd been wearing. Sirius shirts.
Harry bit his lip. He had no idea if it was music he liked.
He handed the box to Sirius to look at.
"Oh, this is awesome!" Sirius cheered.
Harry laughed.
"Do you like these bands?" Sirius asked with an excited look in his eye.
Harry shrugged.
"I've never really listened to music. I…Er…I wore your band shirts while I was living there." Harry said quietly.
He still felt bad for having stolen from Sirius.
"Brilliant. Here." Sirius said not paying any mind to Harry's awkwardness.
Harry reached out and took the headphones and put them over his ears.
Sirius popped the Walkman open and slid in a tape before snapping it shut and pushing a few buttons.
Harry braced himself for something loud. He was surprised when what started to play was soft guitar music. Other instruments began to join and then a soft male voice began to sing.
'There's a lady who's sure, all that glitter's is gold. And she's buying a stairway to heaven.'
Harry closed his eyes and smiled softly. This was not what he'd expected from music Sirius would be excited about.
As the song faded out Harry took the headphones off and smiled at Sirius.
"I like that." Harry said.
Sirius grinned back.
Sirius seemed to be fidgeting.
"I think you should see if you can find your gift from Sirius." Remus commented softly.
Harry took the box with the Walkman back and set it with his other gifts before turning back to the seemingly endless box of gifts. He shuffled a few around and found an oddly shaped one with a tag from Sirius. He pulled it out.
"Hold it away from you." Sirius said softly.
Harry did. He could tell by the weight that it had been shrunken from its original size.
The box was huge when it was full size. He pulled it up and laid it across his lap. He pulled at the wrapping and then at a flap on the side of the box.
Harry's breath caught at the sight. It was a guitar. It was all shiny black wood. There was a thin book in the box as well.
'60's and 70's beginner song book for Guitar'
Harry reached in and gently brushed his fingers across the strings. The sound was lovely. He'd never considered playing an instrument before. It was frivolous. Something he'd never had time to even consider.
"I'd like to teach you to play." Sirius said softly.
Harry smiled and looked over to Sirius.
"Really?" Harry asked.
Sirius nodded.
"I…I think I'd like that." Harry said softly as he looked back down at the guitar.
Harry caught the soft looks Remus and Sirius were sending each other, and him, out of the corner of his eye. Harry felt a warm swoop in his stomach. He was so happy to have these two people in his life.
"Here, I'll tune it for you." Sirius said holding out his hands for the guitar.
Harry passed the whole box to him. It was a little awkward, but they figured it out.
Harry reached into the box again and pulled out the next gift. This one was from Mary. He smiled widely. It was a set of the Lord of the Rings books. He'd read them when he was much younger but was happy to have his own copy.
'Happy birthday, Max' The card read.
Harry smiled as he set the books down. He wondered if Mary had figured out that he'd picked 'Underhill' as an alias last name from those books. He laughed softly and shook his head.
The next gift surprised him even more. It was from Draco. Harry hesitated before opening the box. He smiled softly when he saw that it was a small glass terrarium that had cushioning charms around it. They'd looked at these when they'd been at the nursery. Harry smiled when he realized Draco had gotten the one he'd like best.
The plant inside was a small pink nerve plant. Harry did not remove the small container from the box. He worried it might get jostled.
The next few gifts were all from Sirius and Remus. They were all casual items. Picture frames, a mug with a snitch on it, a blanket. Remus said they were to help him settle into the house. Harry smiled warmly and thanked them both.
His breath caught as he opened the next box. Photo albums.
He didn't open them. He didn't think he could right now.
"We went to the Potter Vault yesterday and got those for you." Remus said softly.
Harry's brows pinched. There wasn't anything in his vault but coins.
"What do you mean? There's nothing but coins in there." Harry asked, looking away from the box.
Remus sighed.
"Harry, that's just your school vault. It was money your parents set aside for you to go to school. To pay for supplies, buy a broom, get treats. I'm sorry that your family vault was kept from you. Unfortunately, the keys were not given to you, but we have them now." Remus said.
Harry ran his hand across the cover of the album as he considered that.
"What's in there?" Harry asked quietly.
Sirius cleared his throat.
"About five generations of wealth and artifacts. There are books, weapons, personal items." Sirius answered.
Harry's breath caught in his chest. He couldn't even imagine. He'd only ever taken what he needed from his vault. Wanting to make sure it would last. This greatly changed things.
"Could I…can I…" Harry started and shook his head.
"We can take you there if you'd like to see. It might be a while. I wouldn't recommend going when you do your back-to-school shopping. There's an overwhelming amount of things in there. We didn't take anything but these. We thought you'd like to have them." Remus answered the unasked question.
Harry nodded.
He lifted the cover of the first one and closed it immediately. The picture was from his first birthday. He had cake on his cheeks and Remus and Sirius were standing to one side and his mom and dad were on the other.
He couldn't look at them now. It was too much.
Harry set the heavy box down next to his feet and grabbed the next item. It was book shaped.
The spidery scrawl quickly let him know it was from Snape.
Again, he hesitated. The man hated him again. Why would he give him anything.
Harry pulled open the plain brown wrapping and found a book. He flipped it open and found Snapes writing in the front cover.
Harry,
This was my potion's journal for the first year of my mastery. I found it while I was going through the office. I hope you will find it interesting and educational. Should I find you using it in class however, and I will remove it from your possession. Your summer essay was easily mastery level work. I believe if you hold the same talent in brewing that your mother did, you could have a bright future in potions if it interests you.
Happy Birthday.
Severus S.
Tears streamed down Harry's cheeks. He'd not expected anything from Snape. Certainly not something so personal.
"Harry?" Remus called softly.
Harry looked up to meet the concerned looks of Sirius and Remus.
"When…When did you get this?" Harry asked shakily.
Remus leaned forward to see what it was.
"Who's it from?" Remus asked.
"Snape." Harry said quietly.
Remus lips pinched tight. He sent a worried glance to Sirius.
"While you were in the hospital. He gave me all the gifts from your friends in Cokeworth." Remus said hesitantly.
Harry could feel his body shaking as more tears fell down his face. Did Snape still care?
Harry wiped his face and gently caressed the cover of the journal.
"I thought he'd hate me after…after…" Harry cut off with another choked sob.
Remus stood and walked closer before kneeling in front of Harry and taking his hands.
"No Harry. Severus doesn't hate you. He's been worried sick and heartbroken over what happened. Is that why you haven't wanted to talk about him? Because you thought he hated you?" Remus asked softly.
Harry bit his lip and nodded as a new wave of tears crashed down his cheeks.
"Oh Harry." Remus sighed.
Harry tried to focus on Remus holding his hands. Snape didn't hate him? How was that possible? Who wouldn't hate him after what he'd done?
Remus held tight to Harry's hands. Harry was shaking and getting dangerously close to hyperventilating.
"Calming draught." Remus mouthed to Sirius who was just watching in growing concern.
Sirius nodded and collected the potion from Remus' bag.
"Here." Sirius said softly, holding out the vial.
"Harry, I need you to drink this." Remus said softly.
Harry nodded and pulled his hand from Remus' grip. He took the calming draught and swallowed half. Remus was hoping he'd take the whole thing, but he'd learned that Harry rarely would take a whole calming draught.
Harry handed it back to Sirius and closed his eye's before pulling his other hand away from Remus. Remus sat back a little, so he wasn't crowding Harry.
"Sorry." Harry said softly after a few moments.
"It's okay. You're allowed to have feelings Harry. We talked about that. I wish you would have shared your feelings sooner. I'm sorry you've been carrying that around." Remus said softly.
Harry shrugged and took a few deep breaths.
Remus was proud of Harry for working on his breathing.
Harry's eyes opened and he glanced between Sirius and Remus before blushing slightly.
"I'm fine guys." Harry said, looking away from them both.
Remus could see the clouding in Harry's eyes as he started to raise his walls.
Remus stood and took a deep breath. He would really like to work with Harry on his shields. Perhaps they could address that when they returned to the school.
Remus nodded to Sirius, and they walked back to their seats.
They sat in a slightly awkward silence for a while. The fire crackled and the trees rustled, the only sounds to break the tension.
Harry stared at the book in his lap. Remus didn't know what it was but clearly it had been impactful to Harry.
Sirius was shooting him worried glances and Remus wasn't sure what to say at this point.
The sound of rustling paper brought their attention back to Harry, who seemed to be opening another gift.
The sudden laughter surprised them both.
I assume you know why I have gifted this – S.S.
Harry read before opening a small square box. He couldn't help but laugh when he was presented with a small silver bell.
He smiled at the joke gift.
Harry wouldn't have believed Snape was even capable of making a joke before this summer.
Harry swallowed thickly and set the book and the bell with his other gifts.
He reached into the box and retrieved the last item. This box was also very small. Harry turned it and found that it was from Remus. He looked up and found that they were both watching him. Harry sent them a half smile.
He opened the wrapping carefully before opening the small box. Inside was a small flat disk about the size of a galleon but silver in color. Around the edge there were runes carved into the face. Harry was still a little shaky on reading runes as his study had entirely been self-taught.
He did his best and thought that the runes were something about protection.
Harry bit his lip and looked back to Remus.
Remus cleared his throat.
"It's similar to a Portkey. There's quite a bit of complex charm work in there. It was something your mother and I worked on in the last war." Remus started.
Harry nodded his understanding.
"It can be carried in your pocket or worn as a pendent if you'd like. It's dual purpose and illegal, so don't let anyone know you have it. It is technically an illegal portkey." Remus said sternly.
Harry nodded. He knew that Dumbledore had made a lot of portkeys to keep the Order safe. Each member now carried one at all times and each safe house held a pair just in case.
"If you hold it and say 'Safety' it will bring you to wherever Sirius and I are. It works on a bit of an altered version of point me. So, whoever is closest to you. If you say 'Home' It will bring you back to the cottage. In either case Sirius and I will be notified that you have used the portkey." Remus explained.
Harry considered that. It was amazing charm work if that was really how it worked.
"How will you know?" Harry asked curiously.
Remus pushed the sleeve of his jacket up and waved his wand. A glamour fell away, and Harry could see a similar silver pendent suspended between two leather straps wrapping around Remus wrist.
Harry considered this for a moment.
"Is yours also a portkey, or will it just notify you?" Harry asked.
Remus smiled.
"Ours work just like yours but to each other or back home. I…after Sirius explained what he was trying to do at the ministry, I wanted a safe way for him to get back to me." Remus said sadly.
Sirius reached out and took Remus' hand.
Harry swallowed hard and nodded. It was strange to still have feelings of grief and guilt for someone you thought had died. Harry hadn't focused much on those feelings since learning Sirius was alive, but those feelings hadn't just disappeared.
Harry bit his lip and considered.
"Can you make them all the same?" Harry asked.
Remus brows creased in confusion.
"So that I know if you have to use it. Or that you can come to me if you need help." Harry asked.
Remus looked concerned and turned to look at Sirius.
"It's not your job to keep us safe, pup." Sirius said.
Harry sighed and looked down at the box in his lap.
"I know…but we're a family now, right? I want us to have each other's backs." Harry said softly, running his finger along the edge of the disk.
Harry had been struggling to accept that Sirius and Remus were also his parents. He knew what the diagnostic said. He knew what he had seen in Remus' memories. He knew what they had told him. He still wasn't sure he could totally believe that they wouldn't abandon him again or push him away. However, he wanted to believe them. More than anything he wanted to believe that they were his family. Regardless, he wanted to be able to protect them. He loved them and didn't want to lose them.
Remus and Sirius considered each other for a moment and Remus eventually nodded before holding out his hand.
Harry handed him the box.
Remus pulled his wand out and quietly cast on the box. He then cast on the charm on his own arm before gesturing for Sirius to produce his. Harry smiled when he saw that Sirius was wearing his the same way Remus was.
After a few minutes Remus handed the box back to Harry with a soft smile. Harry could see the hesitation in his eyes, but Harry wanted to prove to them that they could rely on him. He would do everything he could to see them through this war. He wasn't going to make it out, but they both deserved the chance to have the life they'd never gotten to live.
Harry removed the disk from the box and took off the necklace from Luna. He smiled and slipped the portkey onto the Necklace. It now looked like a background to the wolf pendent.
Harry smiled before putting the necklace back on and slipping it beneath his shirt.
Remus smiled softly before he waved his wand and sent all of Harry's gifts back into the box they'd been in.
"Thanks." Harry said softly before shrinking the box and putting it in his bag.
He yawned widely and Sirius chuckled.
"I think it's probably time for us to all turn in." Remus said, standing from his chair.
Harry nodded and also stood before heading over to where he'd laid his sleeping bag out.
"Goodnight." Harry whispered quietly, as he settled into his sleeping bag.
He folded his arms behind his head and once again watched the stars as he thought about his day.
"Just trust me, okay?" Remus said softly.
Harry swallowed thickly. He wanted to trust Remus, but his heart felt like it was in his throat.
Their morning had been a bit different, as they'd needed to go back to the cottage and floo to his doctor's appointment. The doctor hadn't been impressed with how often Harry still needed his inhaler. He had increased his medication and given him allergy medication to take as well.
Harry had also had to get muggle vaccines, which he'd never had. His shoulder was sore, but he supposed he was glad it was over.
He wouldn't need to go back to the doctor for a few months, unless his breathing got worse, or he had issues with the medication.
Now they were back at the lake. Remus was about to give Harry his first swimming lesson.
He'd been hesitant to get in the water in human form. Swimming as a dog had been fun, but this was scary.
There had also been a very awkward conversation about what he was going to wear into the water. Sirius and Remus had transfigured there underpants into swim trunks. Harry didn't want to be that exposed. Sirius had eventually transfigured Harry's whole outfit into what closely resembled a wetsuit.
Harry liked that he was fully covered. He was trying to remain calm about the fact that Sirius and Remus were topless. He reminded himself that it was normal, and they were all just swimming.
He was now standing knee deep in the water trying to convince himself to walk out to were Remus and Sirius were standing. The water was only to their waists but that still seemed deep.
Harry's hands shook and he looked back up to them. Sirius was truly covered in tattoos. It was like he was a walking piece of art.
"When did you get your first tattoo?" Harry asked.
He needed something to focus on other than the water.
Sirius smiled.
"When I was sixteen." Sirius said.
"What did you get?" Harry asked, shakily taking a step further into the water. It was cold and he could feel the small rocks rolling under his bare feet.
"The moon's down my back." Sirius said, as he turned to show Harry.
Harry studied Sirius back. This side too was covered in tattoos. Down his spine were several moon's, each in a different phase. He really liked it, and thought perhaps he would draw something like it tonight in his sketch book.
Harry nodded and bit his lip as he took another step.
"Will you tell me about it?" Harry asked hesitantly.
Sirius nodded.
"Sure, pup." Sirius said.
Harry nodded and listened as Sirius began.
"I told you I ran away when I was sixteen, to your dad's." Sirius started.
Harry nodded and took another tentative step forward.
"Right, well, I was in pretty rough shape when I showed up. Your dad thought it would help lift my spirits to get the boys together. We spent about a week camping out behind Potter manor. Your grandparents loved having us all there. They always wanted more kids, but they had Jamie pretty late in life." Sirius said.
Harry smiled. He'd never heard much about his grandparents and loved hearing stories. He wondered if there were any pictures of them in the albums.
"Well on the last day we were camping, we decided we needed something different to do." Sirius started.
Remus snorted.
"What Sirius means is, he wasn't being a big enough nuisance and he had to make that someone else's problem." Remus chimed in.
Harry laughed.
"I'm telling the story." Sirius said, bumping into Remus' shoulder.
"Anyway, we went into town. We didn't really know what we were going to do, but then I saw this motorcycle for sale. The guy said it didn't work and wanted it gone." Sirius said with a wide smile.
Harry could see the mischief dancing in his eyes.
"I bought it, and the boys helped me roll it into an alley away from muggle view so I could shrink it. Turned out the alley we were in was for a tattoo parlor. We got caught by the guy that owned the shop. Thought we were up to no good. James told him they were helping me get the nerve to go in." Sirius said rolling his eyes.
Harry laughed again and walked a little deeper into the water.
"So, this huge guy just smiles at me, claps me on the shoulder and walks me in the back door. The others followed, not knowing what else to do. I'd been thinking about getting a tattoo, but I hadn't planned on getting one that day!" Sirius exclaimed, his hands moving animatedly.
"So, the guy starts asking what I want and…" Sirius trailed of and blushed a little.
Harry raised an eyebrow at the reaction. There was a small smile on Sirius' lips as he shot a side long glance at Remus.
"I said moons." Sirius said, blushing a little more.
Harry smiled as Remus blushed too.
"I Er…I just let the guy pick the design from there. James told me to get it on my back because he was worried his parents might see it." Sirius said with a shrug.
Harry nodded. It was a fun story. He'd also nearly made it halfway to them. The slope of the lake was very shallow, despite how far from the beach he was still only about mid-thigh into the water.
"We're you together then?" Harry asked.
He didn't know where the boldness to ask these questions was coming from, but their talks in the evenings had helped him feel more secure in asking them personal questions.
To Harry's surprise Sirius shook his head.
"No, I had a crush…figured it would go away eventually." Sirius laughed.
"You looked right at me when you said that too. I think my stomach did backflips all the way back to James' house." Remus said shaking his head.
Harry laughed.
"So, you got a tattoo for a guy you liked that you weren't even with?" Harry asked a little smugly.
Sirius shook his head.
"I'd always have Moony, even if it wasn't like that." Sirius said with conviction.
Remus blushed again and nodded.
"How long did you two dance around that?" Harry asked curiously.
"Almost another two years." Remus answered, shaking his head.
"I finally asked him out spring of our seventh year." Sirius said.
Harry was once again awed by the love in Sirius' eyes.
"I'm glad you found each other." Harry said, taking the last few steps towards them.
Remus smiled happily.
"You made it out here." Remus said.
Harry nodded.
"Alright, well lets see if you can float first, then we'll work from there." Remus said.
Harry nodded and followed Remus' instructions.
He took a deep breath and let Remus guide him backwards into the water. He tried to relax as he was instructed and after a few attempts Remus was able to step away from him and left him floating in the water.
Harry relaxed and looked up at the beautiful sky. He remembered floating before. Where had he been floating?
Harry closed his eyes and the thought surfaced. He'd been floating in his mind before he'd woken up in the hospital wing.
His body began to tense, and he started to sink. Remus grabbed his shoulders and pulled him up before his head went under.
"Good. You did good." Remus said before they tried again.
Harry sighed as he stood in the sitting room of Lupin cottage. He had all of his things in his trunk, which was now shrunken in his pocket. He was waiting for Sirius and Remus to floo with him to Snape's house.
They'd spent a whole week camping and each day had been great. They had played cards, hiked, and swam in the lake. Harry had quietly collected potions ingredients he thought might be useful later. Sirius had played lots of songs on Harry's guitar. He had shown Harry a few things and had promised they would practice more when they got to school.
Remus had encouraged him to draw, and Harry had. He'd nearly filled his sketchbook and was very thankful he'd been gifted a new one. He thought he might go to town and buy a few more before the school year started.
He sighed again. He didn't have any idea what things would look like at Snapes. Remus and Sirius had taken down all the wards, but they were still treating him like he might break. He wondered how Snape would behave.
Remus had reassured him that Snape wasn't mad, but Harry was still hesitant. His anxiety only seemed to grow as he continued to wait.
Remus and Sirius would be leaving for their trip as soon as they dropped him off. They would be flooing from Snapes to Hogwarts and getting an international portkey from Dumbledore to go to the States.
Apparently, with such a large werewolf population there, they had little choice but to allow werewolves more rights. Harry was worried about their trip, but they promised to call every night and check in with him. He wished he could go with them but knew that his presence would only put them in danger.
The states were not at war like they were, but there were rumors of building tensions. There had been Death Eaters spotted in various Wixen locations trying to recruit all over the world. He'd learned that, eavesdropping on Sirius and Remus one night while they sat by the fire. They had thought he was asleep.
Harry pet Edgar gently and held him close to his chest. The war had never scared him as much as it did right now. He didn't want to lose Sirius and Remus again.
He'd also been informed last night that they were planning to get married while they were away. Harry had been a little disappointed but understood. They'd promised they'd still try and have a ceremony here that he could be a part of, but Harry had just shrugged it off. They needed to do what was best for them. His feelings on the matter weren't important.
"Take a breath Remy. It's going to be okay." Sirius said, rubbing his hand in gentle circles on Remus' back.
The stress of the trip and leaving Harry was getting to Remus. Sirius was doing his best to keep him calm.
"What if something happens though?" Remus said worriedly.
Sirius sighed.
"Then we'll have to trust Severus to take care of it until we can get back." Sirius said.
He couldn't believe he was championing Severus Snape of all people, but the man had shown his true colors this summer. Sirius trusted him to watch Harry.
Remus nodded warily.
"Come on. We need to take the portkey in less than an hour." Sirius said, waving his wand and shrinking their bags.
Remus wrapped Sirius in a tight hug and Sirius hugged back just as tight.
"Everything will work out. Harry's been making really good progress." Sirius tried to reassure.
"Plus, you're about to officially become Healer Lupin." Sirius said with a smirk.
Remus rolled his eyes and pushed Sirius away.
"Right." Remus said sarcastically.
"You are. And we're going to get married. Then we'll get to go work at Hogwarts. We'll be back in the castle. Together. With Harry. Things are good right now. Okay? You'll see." Sirius tried to soothe.
Remus nodded.
"You're right." Remus conceded.
"Of course I am." Sirius said jokingly.
Remus rolled his eyes and ran his hand through his hair.
Sirius watched as Remus went through their room one more time before heading to the door.
Sirius caught Remus' wrist and spun him around. His other hand came up and ran into Remus' hair, then he leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to Remus' lips.
Sirius could feel Remus smiling lightly as they kissed. When he pulled back, he smiled softly at Remus.
"Let's just enjoy our trip. We've never gotten to go on a proper holiday together." Sirius said.
"That's true. Are you going to spoil me?" Remus asked softly.
Sirius smirked.
"Of course." Sirius whispered back.
Remus blushed and nodded before reaching for the door.
Harry turned to see Remus and Sirius enter the sitting room.
"Do you have everything?" Remus asked.
Harry nodded.
"And you sent Hedwig to the Burrow?" Remus asked.
Harry nodded again.
It had been hard to send her away again. She'd seemed content to go this time though.
"We love you; you know." Remus said, his voice a little thick.
Harry tried to smile but he was worried it came out as more of a grimace. He was worried too. It was very clear that Remus was worried.
"I…I love you guys too." Harry whispered softly. He could feel tears forming in his eyes and blinked them away.
He tried to remind himself it was only going to be for a week, but the worry remained. This could be the last time he saw them.
Harry set Edgar down on the couch and stepped closer to Remus. He reached out and pulled Remus into a hug.
"I love you. Please be careful." Harry whispered.
It had taken him time to build up to saying he loved them. However, he knew that time could be fleeting for all of them, and he wanted them to know how much they meant to him.
"I love you too." Remus whispered hugging Harry tighter before releasing him.
Harry pulled back and then found himself wrapped up in Sirius' arms.
"Love you, Pup." Sirius mumbled into his hair, before he kissed the top of his head.
"Love you too." Harry said into Sirius chest.
When Harry pulled away, he turned away from them to wipe the tears from his face. He cleared his throat and collected Edgar from the couch.
There was a soft jingle of a bell. Harry had attached the bell from Snape onto Edgar's collar, much to his annoyance, after he'd shown an interest in hunting the birds while they were camping. Harry had woken to a dead bird next to his head and a proud kitten standing on his chest.
The bell at least gave the birds some warning that the silent little menace was hunting them.
"Shall we?" Remus asked.
Harry looked around the cottage once more. He wondered if he would ever see it again. He'd only stayed here for a few weeks, but it already felt more like home then anywhere else.
With a sigh he nodded.
He wondered if this was how his classmates felt leaving for school every year. He'd always been so desperate to leave the Dursley's and get back to school. He'd never lamented leaving like he was now.
Harry nodded and took some floo powder from the pot above the fireplace.
"Spinner's End." Harry called out before stepping into the green flames.