Author's note- Hey readers. Thanks for the positive thoughts. Things haven't really resolved with the personal stuff, but I was able to get this written. Hopefully, I'll be able to get the last two written soon. I think this chapter turned out pretty good. Made myself cry a few times. Leave me a review and let me know what you think.
Song inspirations- i am not who i was -Chance Peña (Harry), Unchained Melody- The Righteous Brothers (Sirius & Remus)
Chapter 68
Life at the Burrow
Ron sat happily at the kitchen table eating the wonderful breakfast his mother had made. Hermione sat next to him making small talk with Ginny. Dean was doing his best not to fall asleep in his plate. The summer had been long and although he usually dreaded heading back to school, he was somewhat looking forward to it this year.
He hadn't seen Harry in months, and they'd received almost no information about how he was. They knew he was with Snape but that was about it. His parents had been incredibly stressed all summer. There had been several attacks and so many order meetings. He knew something major had happened about a month ago.
His mother had been hugging all of them a lot and he'd found her crying more than once. She hadn't told them what was happening, and he hoped when he got back to school, he'd figure it out. He suspected someone had died but nothing had been said.
Whatever was happening he also hadn't seen any of his brothers in a while. They all had been coming pretty regularly for Sunday dinner, but Bill was showing up less and less and he hadn't seen the twins in over a month.
He watched as his mother finished cleaning and spun around, her hands on her hips. That look didn't bode well for any of them. She had put them all to work this summer. Not that anyone but him ever really complained.
"Now, when you are all finished up, I want you to go up and start getting your packing done." His mother said firmly.
"Mum, school's not for days. Why do we have to pack today?" Ron whined.
His mother gave him a stern look.
"Harry is coming today. Tomorrow we'll be going to Diagon Alley and then the next day will be off to the train. I don't want the lot of you running around here looking for your things last minute." His mother said.
Ron quickly shot Hermione an excided look before turning back to his mum.
"Harry's coming today? When? Why didn't you tell us sooner?!" Ron asked excitedly.
He didn't even care about doing his packing now. He couldn't wait to see Harry.
"Severus said he'd have them here before lunch. So off with you. Go get your packing done." His mother said with a shooing motion.
"Them?" Hermione asked.
His mother sighed a little and nodded.
"Draco Malfoy will also be spending the next two days with us. I expect you all to be respectful. It's not too late in the summer to send you out to de-gnome the garden." His mother said wagging her finger at them all.
Ron felt righteous anger well up in his chest.
"Malfoy! Why?" Ron said jumping up from his seat.
His mother gave him a sharp look and he blushed a little and retook his seat.
"He's also been staying with Severus. All the Professors need to get ready for the school year." His mother informed them.
Ron gave Hermione a scandalized look and she returned it. He knew better then to continue to argue with his mother. He popped the last bite of breakfast sausage in his mouth before standing. They all filed out of the kitchen and headed back up the stairs.
All four of them walked into Ginny's room before the door was closed. They all looked at each other in uncertainty.
"Malfoy's been with Snape? Harry's lucky he survived the summer." Dean said with a scoff as he settled back on Ginny's bed.
Ron sighed and settled on Hermione's bed with her. He threaded his fingers into Hermione's and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"How long you suppose he's been there?" Ron asked.
Hermione shrugged.
"Don't know. Maybe all summer. Malfoy seems pretty close to Professor Snape." Hermione said softly.
Ron nodded.
"Well, I don't care what mum says, if the prat start's something, I'll curse him all the way back to Snape's." Ron growled.
Malfoy had called Hermione a mudblood more then once. Not to mention all the comments about his family's poverty over the years.
Hermione gave him a tight smile.
"We should do as your mum has asked. We'll just try and avoid him." Hermione said.
Ron sighed but eventually nodded. He wanted to spend time with Hermione and Harry, not doing chores for hexing Malfoy.
"I hope Harry's all right. We haven't heard much from him. Maybe this kind of explains it. I mean he's been with Snape for two months and Malfoy for who knows how long. He's probably had a miserable summer." Ginny added from the middle of the room.
She stood with her arms crossed and a concerned look on her face. Ron would never say it, but she looked like their mum when she did that.
"Possibly. I think Harry's probably had a difficult summer. I think we know that at this point. We should just try and not bring it up. Let him have a little bit of fun. If he wants to tell us what's going on we'll let him." Hermione said softly.
Ron's jaw clenched. He didn't want to interrogate Harry, but he wanted to know what was going on.
Ron nodded as he climbed off the bed. He looked at Dean and nodded towards the door.
"Let's get to our packing. Maybe we can go for a fly when Harry get's here if were done." Ron said.
The others nodded in agreement. He bent down and gave Hermione a soft kiss on her lips.
"Are you going to fly with us?" Ron asked with a soft smile.
Hermione smirked. He'd been able to get her comfortable on a broom this summer. She wasn't the best at it yet, but she was much better then she'd been at the beginning of the summer.
"Maybe." Hermione said with a nod.
Ron smiled brightly. He and Hermione had gotten to know each other in ways this summer that they hadn't before. She had been sharing some of her favorite muggle stories and she'd brought some board games that she loved. He'd taught her how to fly a broom and was slowly teaching her wizards chess.
He loved the frustrated little noises she made when she played, and the way her nose wrinkled as she concentrated.
He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead before heading out the door.
He was thankful for the time they'd spent in the hospital wing. He hated that she'd been hurt but it had given them time to talk. They'd finally said the thing that had been floating around them for over a year. It was a wonderful feeling to be with her. She knew him so well and there friendship only felt stronger.
Ron smiled slightly as they made their way upstairs.
He groaned as he looked around his room. It had turned into a bit of a stye if he was being honest. He and Dean hadn't paid much attention to it. It was just their space, but now looking at their things everywhere and mixed together he realized his mother might have had a point about getting this sorted now.
Harry stumbled into the sitting room of the Burrow. He was thankful no one was in there. He was looking forward to seeing his friends, but he was still hesitant.
"Harry." Mrs. Weasley called from the door, before she rushed over to him and wrapped him in her arms.
"Hello, Mrs. Weasley." Harry mumbled into her shoulder as she crushed him in a hug.
He leaned into the comfort slightly.
She pulled away and her hand came up to his cheek.
"I'm so glad you're okay." Mrs. Weasley said a little thickly.
Harry could see tears in her eyes. He looked away and took a breath to steady himself. He knew that Ron's parents were aware of his time in the hospital. He just hadn't thought about it much. Any time his mind floated back to that night he started to panic and feel overwhelmed. He knew he should probably discuss it with Remus but, he didn't want to be a burden.
The floo flared behind him and Draco stepped out gracefully. He had a forced neutral look on his face. Harry gave him a soft smile, that Draco didn't return.
Mrs. Weasley stepped away from Harry and walked to Draco.
"Hello Draco, I'm Molly. Welcome to our home." Mrs. Weasley said with a bright smile.
Harry noticed Draco's shoulders relax a little.
"Hello, thank you for having me." Draco said stiffly.
The floo flared again and Snape stepped out, almost bumping into Draco and Mrs. Weasley.
"Molly." Snape greeted with a nod.
"Hello Severus. I hope you plan to stay for lunch. I've made plenty for everyone." Mrs. Weasley said.
Harry noticed a slight smile at the corner of Snape's mouth. Harry realized it actually meant a lot to Snape to be included. Harry knew how that felt. Maybe he could convince Sirius and Remus to… He didn't know…maybe befriend Snape.
"I'm sorry. Albus is expecting me shortly." Snape said politely.
"Well, I'll make you some plates to take." Mrs. Weasley said.
She wasn't the kind to take no for an answer when it came to food. Harry looked to Snape and laughed a little.
"Brat." Snape mumbled as he walked past Harry to follow Mrs. Weasley to the kitchen.
"You okay?" Harry asked Draco.
Draco looked stressed as he looked around the cozy sitting room. He shrugged.
Harry smiled a little and led them to the couch.
"I'm sure Snape wants to talk to Mrs. Weasley. We'll give them a minute. Why don't we just sit for a while." Harry suggested.
Draco hesitated for a minute before nodding and joining Harry.
Severus stomach growled slightly at the wonderful smells in the kitchen. Molly had a feast on the table. He watched as she bustled around.
"Is it just you and Albus, or are you meeting with the other heads of house?" Molly asked over her shoulder as she pulled down plates.
"Minerva and I are meeting with Albus about some Order business." Severus said.
Molly looked over her shoulder. She had a concerned look on her face before nodding. Severus understood the look. Things had not been good this summer. Every meeting had been unwelcome news.
"Tell me what I need to know while I get these together." Molly said setting the plates to hover above the table while she started grabbing spoons to dish up the food.
Severus took a deep breath.
"Draco has been struggling with nightmares. I've brought two dreamless sleeps. He may have them both nights if he needs them. He's understandably nervous about being here. I know you'll make him comfortable, and I've asked Harry to keep the peace if he can." Severus started.
Molly nodded and Severus continued.
"Harry and Draco have built a tentative friendship, and I hope they'll be able to maintain it. I'm not sure how likely that is given all the tension, but you don't need to worry about them being together. Their earlier disagreements are in the past." Severus explained.
Molly glanced at him in surprise but nodded.
"Harry." Severus started with a sigh.
"He's mostly been doing all right. We've been holding on to his potions. He has several he needs to take. I've brought them as well as his schedule. He is still struggling with meals. Though I'm sure he'll gain a stone before leaving here." Severus said sarcastically.
Molly glanced at him before rolling her eyes.
"Yes, I'm aware how the boy is with food. I'll make sure he eats." Molly said firmly.
"How is he doing emotionally?" Molly asked in concern.
Severus sighed.
"He has his good days and his bad. I'd say he'll probably hold it together while he's here. He hides a lot of it. I think he is worried about what to tell his friends. I'd ask that you don't push him to say more then he's ready for." Severus said.
"Of course." Molly agreed.
She cast protection spells over the plates and floated them over to Severus. She put her hands on her hips and looked up at him, waiting for him to continue.
"Remus has asked that he's always with someone while he's in the alley and at the station. He doesn't want him to be alone." Severus said.
Molly looked a little sad but nodded.
"I know it might be hard to police so many children. Especially teens but Harry shouldn't drink. His body is still healing." Severus added.
Molly's lips pinched tightly.
"Yes, we've already had to talk to the kids once. I think I made my point pretty clear about that. Arthur and I don't drink, so there isn't alcohol in the house. I've told the twins if they bring the kids anymore, they won't be allowed to Sunday dinner." Molly said.
Severus nodded. He knew the woman would never push her children away like that, but he understood where she was coming from.
"Very well. I'd also ask you to keep an eye out for Merrick Fletcher." Severus said.
Molly raised an eyebrow.
"Mundungus' cousin? I wouldn't let the children around him for any reason. He's bad news. Heard he was dealing in dark artifacts." Molly said in outrage, though her voice didn't get much louder.
"Of course." Severus said with a nod.
He was thankful he wasn't going to have to try and explain more. He'd promised Harry he wouldn't. He didn't want Harry or any of the children around such a person. Though he was tempted to go looking for the man himself.
He took a deep breath and rained in his anger.
"I better get going." Severus said.
Molly nodded and Severus followed her back to the sitting room.
He smiled softly when he saw Harry and Draco sitting on the couch. They were sitting next to each other with their heads tipped back. They both had headphones on and there eyes closed.
They weren't touching, but Severus was surprised by how close they were sitting. Both looked comfortable and relaxed.
Severus was thankful to Harry for making Draco comfortable here.
Molly looked at him with a smile.
"They do seem content together." Molly said.
Severus nodded and approached Draco before gently touching his shoulder. His eyes flew open, and he sat up. The movement stirred Harry.
They both pulled off there headphones before they looked at him.
"I'm going to go." Severus said taking a step back.
Both boys stood.
"Please behave for Molly. I expect to see you both at the welcoming feast. Don't do anything dangerous." Severus said firmly.
Both boys nodded. Severus held open his arms and Draco stepped into the hug.
"It'll be all right Draco. We'll talk when you get to school. I love you." Severus said hugging Draco tight before letting his arms drop.
Draco looked him in the eye and nodded.
They stood there awkwardly for a moment before Severus opened his arms and looked at Harry. He wasn't sure he would take a hug, but he wanted him to know it was an option.
Harry blushed and hesitated for a moment before also stepping forward and hugging him. Severus' heart ached for these two boys' that had been through so much this summer. He hoped that the school year could be quiet. Though he had his doubts.
As he held Harry, he thought of the letter from Lily, and the roll he might have played in Harry's life had she lived. He thought of all that they'd worked through this summer.
"Be safe. I love you." Severus whispered into the top of Harry's messy hair.
He squeezed a little tighter before letting go.
Harry glanced over his shoulder before leaning in.
"Be safe. And don't touch it." Harry whispered.
Severus looked at him in confusion before nodding. He wasn't sure what Harry was talking about, but he was going on a potentially dangerous mission. Perhaps he meant whatever was in the box.
"All right. I better go." Severus said with a nod.
He took the plates and stacked them in his hand before tossing in some floo powder and flooing to Albus office.
Ron's brows creased in utter confusion as he watched Harry and Malfoy on the couch. He was hiding on the stairs. They weren't doing anything. Just sitting there with something on their heads.
Ron wanted to barge in and start questioning Harry and yelling at Malfoy, but he just watched for a moment. He pulled back when he heard his mother and Snape come into the sitting room. Ron watched as Snape got Malfoy's attention and then to his surprise hugged the little prat.
Ron felt like the rug was pulled out from under him when Harry stepped up and hugged the greasy git.
What the hell was happening?!
As quietly as he could he made his way back up the stairs. Thankfully covered by the sound of the floo flaring.
Ron knocked twice quickly before pushing Ginny's door open and slipping inside.
"Ron! The polite thing to do is wait for someone to answer the door. What if we'd been changing?" Ginny said indignantly.
"Shhh." Ron hissed. Waving off his sister's protests.
"What Ron?" Hermione asked.
"Harry's here." Ron said hesitantly.
Hermione raised an eyebrow.
"But…I just saw something really weird." Ron said.
He really didn't know what to think.
"What kind of weird?" Hermione said, taking a seat on her bed.
Ron sighed.
"Harry and Malfoy were just sitting on the couch with like some kind of thing over there ears? It had like cords?" Ron tried to explain.
Hermione got an exacerbated expression and reached into her purse before pulling out something similar.
"Headphones?" Hermione asked, waving the things at him.
Ron nodded.
"Honestly, Ronald, how have you spent the last five years with two muggle raised friends and you don't know what the simplest things are. They are for listening to music." Hermione explained.
"Still, why is Harry just hanging out with Malfoy?" Ron argued. Circling back to his actual point.
Hermione shrugged.
"I don't know. It's almost lunch time. Your mom is probably about to call us down. She probably told them to just stay down there. Was Professor Snape still here?" Hermione asked.
Ron nodded.
"Yeah, that was the weirder part. Snape came back into the sitting room with mum and hugged Malfoy. Then he hugged Harry!" Ron said waving his hands around to accentuate the craziness of what he'd seen.
Hermione's brows pinched a little and she looked over to Ginny.
"Maybe they've started getting along?" Hermione suggested.
"Snape and Harry?" Ron asked incredulously.
Hermione just shrugged.
"I think he's been brainwashed by the snakes." Ron growled.
Hermione huffed and gave him the 'your being stupid again' look.
"What? Give me a better explanation." Ron replied, crossing his arms defensively.
Hermione glanced at Ginny again and leaned back against the headboard.
"I don't know Ron. Harry doesn't exactly have a lot of stable adults in his life. Maybe if were right about what's been going on with Harry, maybe Snape's been helping him." Hermione suggested.
Ron gave her an outraged look.
"Snape. Professor Snape. Giant bat of the dungeon. Likes to pick on kids until they cry, spent all of last year abusing Harry by ripping into his mind? That Snape? You think that's the person that would help Harry if his relatives have been abusing him?" Ron asked angerly.
"Maybe. I didn't say it was likely, just possible. Maybe getting found out as a spy or almost dying has changed Snape? Maybe something happened this summer we don't know about. It's not like we've heard much about Harry. Next to none from Harry himself." Hermione said.
Ron huffed. He didn't like it. Something felt off about the whole situation.
"Kid's, time for lunch." His mother called from the bottom of the stairs.
Ron sighed again.
"I guess will see." Hermione said as she hopped off the bed.
Ron grumbled and followed everyone downstairs.
Harry sat hesitantly next to Draco at the kitchen table. Mrs. Weasley had made a ton of food. He wished he felt hungry at all. She'd already given him his potions. He appreciated that she'd done it before everyone came down.
Draco looked nervous as well.
"There not going to hex you at the table. Mrs. Weasley would go spare." Harry whispered softly as they heard footsteps coming down the stairs.
Draco gave him an unconvinced look.
Harry returned it with a reassuring smile.
He pushed his walls up a little as he heard his friends making there way through the sitting room. Hermione was certainly going to crush him in a hug. He was feeling a little exposed and was thankful that he had decided to shift back to his boy-who-lived form. He couldn't handle their stares right now.
Harry stood when Hermione pushed the door open.
"Harry!" Hermione cheered as she charged into him and through her arms around his neck.
Harry wrinkled his nose as her bushy hair tickled his face.
"Hey Mione." Harry said softly as he hugged her back.
Hermione pulled away and looked him over.
"You've grown a little. You look good." Hermione said with a smile.
Harry blushed and looked away from her with a nod.
His eyes fell on Ron. He had a strange look on his face. The emotion that was rolling off of him was suspicion. He didn't really understand. He took a step away from Hermione, assuming that Ron might be feeling jealous of the hug. Though he hoped that wasn't the case. He certainly wasn't trying to get between Ron and Hermione.
"Hey mate." Harry said.
"Hey." Ron said with a half-smile.
Ginny pushed her way through the others and surprisingly also gave him a tight hug.
"Hey Gin." Harry said with a slight laugh.
"Hey." She said as she stepped away.
"We missed you." she added with a smile.
Harry nodded and held out his hand to Dean.
"Good to see you too." Harry said.
Dean smiled and nodded.
"We should eat. You're mom has made quite the feast." Harry said lightly to Ron.
Ron smiled and happily took a seat across from him. Hermione sat next to him and across from Draco. She glanced at him and then over to Harry.
Nothing was said to acknowledge Draco's presence as they all dug in. He knew they'd talk about it later but was thankful that it hadn't turned into an issue over lunch.
Harry dished up some food, though he truly had no appetite. It smelt delicious, but his stomach was in anxious knots as he tried to figure out what he was going to say to his friends. He was going to need to tell them something about this summer. He just still wasn't sure what to say. How much or how little.
He sighed as he poked at his food with his fork.
"Well, that was quite a treat." Albus said as he finished off the plate of food Severus had brought.
He'd been surprised when he'd arrived with lunch for them all from Molly.
"Indeed." Minerva agreed.
"Blippy." Albus called.
One of his favorite house elves appeared next to his desk.
"Master Dumbledore has called Blippy." The little elf said.
"Yes, Blippy. I would appreciate it if you'd take our dishes, clean them, and return them to Molly Weasley with our sincere thanks." Albus instructed.
"Right away, Sir." Blippy said, snapping his fingers. Their plates were clean and stacked in his hand before he was gone with a pop.
Albus took a deep breath before he looked to Severus and Minerva.
"We will be going to the Gaunt house, where I believe Tom has hidden one of his Horcruxes." Albus explained.
Minerva and Severus both looked serious. Then suddenly Severus got an unusual expression on his face. He began to dig in his pockets before pulling something out. Suddenly a black box Albus had seen before was produced. It was the box Harry had held when he'd brought the three destroyed Horcruxes to him.
He felt his stomach twist painfully. He had never meant for Harry to know about the Horcrux in his scar. Not until the very end. He couldn't imagine the emotional toll that was taking on Harry.
He swallowed thickly and wondered if Harry had found another. That would be unfortunate. His current theory was that Tom had made seven, splitting his soul unknowingly into eight. If that was true then most of them had been destroyed, but if Harry had found another then there was no telling what Tom had done.
"Harry gave this to me and said you'd understand." Severus mumbled as he set his hand on top and whispered something.
His brows creased before he looked up to Albus.
"What is it?" Albus asked worriedly.
"A fang." Severus said in confusion.
Albus sighed. Harry had given them the tool to destroy the Horcrux.
"Did you tell Harry what we were doing today?" Albus asked.
Severus shook his head.
"Of course not. The boy has enough going on. He doesn't need to be involved in this war more then he already has been. I, unlike my predecessor, wouldn't inform a child of the most putrid dark magic." Severus sneered.
Albus sighed before he nodded. He pressed his hand to a drawer in his desk and felt the ward release. He pulled it open and looked inside. He had promised to be honest with them. While he still wasn't going to tell them about the horcrux in Harry, they deserved to know about the others.
He picked up the diary that lay under the other three Horcruxes. He lifted them all and set them on his desk without saying anything for a moment.
"Albus, what is this?" Minerva said standing and approaching the desk.
Severus followed.
"These are four of Tom's Horcruxes. Each was destroyed by Harry." Albus admitted quietly before raising his head and looking up at his friends.
Severus looked livid. Minerva looked sad and disgusted.
"How is it the boy came into possession of these items Albus? How did he know what they were?" Severus growled before stepping back, leaving the black box at the edge of the desk.
Albus sighed.
"The diary Harry destroyed in the Chamber of Secrets three years ago. It was what first tipped me off that this was what Tom had done. It's when I began my research. I do not believe Harry was aware of what the item was and destroyed it out of desperation and sheer luck." Albus explained.
Severus was now pacing, his hands fisted at his sides.
"And the others?" Severus asked angerly.
Albus sighed. Neither of them was going to like this answer. He knew he was not on good terms with anyone who was aware of Harry's situation.
He shook his head. He would never forgive himself for what he had done. It felt like his heart had been shattered. The fact that Harry had thought he may have intentionally left him there because of the Horcrux was horrifying. He'd never cause a child pain or put them in a situation to be harmed.
"Harry brought the other three to me the day he woke up, after his suicide attempt." Albus said quietly.
Severus stopped pacing and glared hard at him. Minerva's mouth gaped in shock.
"I don't know how he learned that Tom had made Horcruxes or even what they were. I suspected that perhaps you had said something. Obviously, I was wrong about that. Do you have any books in your home that might cover the subject?" Albus asked.
Severus jaw clenched.
"No, I most certainly do not." Severus said firmly.
Albus nodded.
"I'm not sure how he learned. Nor do I know where he found these. This gift from Harry is likely a Basilisk fang. One of a limited number of ways to destroy a Horcrux. He knew somehow that it was what you were coming to do." Albus said.
He didn't disbelieve Severus but obviously Harry had known.
Severus pinched the bridge of his nose before brushing the hair out of his face.
"I was thinking about our last meeting. He probably saw it. I wasn't occluding. I try not to when I talk with Harry. It makes him feel insecure. His high magical level and natural Legilimens abilities make him almost an empath. He hasn't been trained so he doesn't really know how to turn it off. I did not mean for him to see that memory." Severus sighed.
Albus nodded. Harry needed a lot of training. He hoped to offer the boy some training himself when he returned. He would not force him to take it though. He had watched the light go out of Harry's eyes when he realized that he hadn't known about the abuse.
His mind slipped to a distant time when Harry had been only a baby. Harry would happily sit with him and watch in amazement as he performed simple but showy magic. Thinking of those memories had been painful for a long time. Even more so over the last month.
"I see. Did Harry tell you anything else?" Albus asked.
Severus shrugged.
"He said the item in the box was extremely dangerous and to handle it with care. Though if you're right and it is a basilisk fang, that is an understatement. How did you intend to destroy the Horcrux when you found it?" Severus asked looking from the box back to Albus.
Albus nodded.
"The sword of Gryffindor. Harry slayed the Basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets. The blade is impregnated with Basilisk venom. It will also work." Albus said.
"What!?" Minerva squawked.
"He slayed the beast! Albus that tooth is huge! You're telling me a second year destroyed a Basilisk? How big was it?" Minerva said in alarm.
"Harry says fifty or Sixty feet." Severus answered distractedly.
Albus took a deep breath. Clearly Harry had opened up to Severus more than he'd thought. Truly he was thankful. They both needed it.
"Harry told you the story I take it." Albus said.
Severus nodded.
"Yes, it seems you're version was rather abridged." Severus said with a raised eyebrow.
Albus swallowed thickly. He hadn't meant it as a slight, or a lack of trust when he hadn't told them the whole story.
"My intention wasn't to deceive. I was concerned about the diary. I suspected dark magic, and I couldn't explain the story without disclosing that information. I wanted time to gather information. I apologize if either of you feel I have lied to you." Albus said earnestly.
Severus jaw was clenched so tight that Albus was worried he'd break a tooth.
"Is this why Harry attempted to kill himself?" Severus asked darkly.
Albus could see the pain and anger in his eyes. It was obvious how much Severus had come to care for Harry.
"I can't speak to that. Though I imagine it was a factor. Horcruxes are insidious. They can also have all sorts of other enchantments on them." Albus answered quietly.
He knew Harry had tried to kill himself to destroy the horcrux in his scar. The decision had likely been exacerbated by the cruelty he had faced by his relatives. He couldn't tell them that though.
Severus sighed deeply, though he still seemed upset.
"Let's get this done with." Severus said with a shake of his head.
Albus nodded and stood.
"Harry said not to touch it. I didn't understand that he knew what we were doing. I imagine he meant the Horcrux. I suggest that as much as we can we try to avoid touching anything in the house. The Dark Lord is known for vicious wards and traps. We should also conduct the search as quickly as possible. There may be monitoring spells to alert him of our presence." Severus said firmly.
He was speaking to both of them, but he was looking to Minerva.
Albus nodded as did Minerva. They could hold there own if they were ambushed by Death Eaters, but he'd rather not get into a fight if they could avoid it.
"How are we getting there?" Severus asked.
Albus held out his arm and Fawkes launched himself off of his perch and landed on him. Albus smiled at his familiar.
Minerva and Severus took hold of his arms and with a burst of flame they were gone from his office.
Harry chewed on his lip while he sat uncomfortably on George's bed. Mrs. Weasley had sent he and Draco up to settle in. She'd sent everyone else back to there rooms to finish packing. She'd asked that they not spread out to much. Harry didn't even intend to unshrink his trunk. He had what he needed in his bag.
Ron and Hermione seemed off and he wasn't sure what to do. He hadn't even told them anything yet and they already seemed distant.
He felt restless and guilty. He should have told them something sooner. They were going to be angry with him that he kept so much from them. He sighed and stood. The room was starting to feel like it was closing in on him.
He walked down the hall to the bathroom. Closing the door, he leaned against the sink. He tried to remind himself that he was just panicking. Nothing was actually wrong, but it wasn't helping. He needed Ron and Hermione. As much as he wanted to push them away to keep them safe, he just couldn't.
"Fuck." He cussed softly.
Everything felt so overwhelming. He couldn't continue keeping so much from them, but he worried if he started talking it would all just pour out and they would see the real him. They wouldn't want to be friends with that person. The real him was a disgusting freak. Not worthy of their friendship.
A choked sob slipped past his lips. He glanced anxiously at the door before he waved his hand and pulled up a privacy ward.
He wiped angrily at the tears on his face. He was so pathetic. The anger and guilt began to twist together in his stomach. He looked at himself in the mirror and sneered.
He glanced around on the counter and found what he was looking for, a razor. He shook is head. It was too obvious. Someone would notice it missing. He shuffled through the drawers until he found a small pack of razor blades.
He slid the top one out before pushing up his sleeve. He hated himself. He hated all the pain he was causing.
He brought the blade to his arm and hesitated for a moment. He thought about Snape and Remus holding his arm so gently and healing his cuts.
He swallowed thickly. He didn't want to let them down. They weren't here though, and he needed this.
He pushed the blade harshly against his arm and made a deep cut. He watched the blood run down his arm. With a deep breath, he brought the blade to his arm again.
The pain grounded him. He focused on that alone. The blood spotted the sink and the counter. When his mind was finally calm, he took slow deep breaths and set down the blade.
He glared at the marks on his arm.
"Freak." He sneered.
He vanished the blood from the sink and the blade and quickly cleaned up his arm. Just as he pulled down his sleeve there was a knock on the door. He startled and grabbed the pack of razors and shoved the one he'd used back in the pack. Then he shoved them in his pocket.
He looked himself over and was relieved he didn't have any blood on him. Thankfully, his long sleeve shirt was black today.
"He looked at his face and noticed his eyes were red. He shrugged. He couldn't do anything about that.
He pulled the door open and found Draco on the other side.
He looked Harry over in concern. Harry tried not to fidget.
"Are you okay?" Draco asked.
Harry nodded and stepped out of the bathroom.
"Mrs. Weasley's food is a bit heavy on my stomach. I'm fine." Harry lied with a shrug. He honestly had only managed about two bites of lunch.
Draco followed him back to the twin's room.
"I know Severus gave her your potions. If your stomach is upset just ask for another stomach soother." Draco said, sitting down on Fred's bed and facing Harry.
Harry just shrugged.
Draco just stared at him for a long time like he was going to say something but eventually just shook his head.
"I'm going to go talk to Ron and Hermione." Harry said standing from the bed.
Draco nodded.
"I'm just going to read. I'm hoping if I just stay out of the way I can avoid conflict while I'm here." Draco said.
Harry nodded. He knew Draco wasn't comfortable being here.
"Do you want the Walkman?" Harry offered.
Draco considered for a moment before nodding.
Harry dug in his bag and pulled it out as well as Draco's headphones.
"Don't stress. You're going to be all right." Harry said, with a reassuring smile.
Just because he wasn't okay didn't mean he couldn't try to comfort Draco.
Draco returned the smile and took the Walkman before settling back on the bed.
Harry set the box of tapes on his bed before shrinking his bag and heading out.
He walked to Ron's room first and was thankful that it looked like Ron was done packing. Dean wasn't in there. Harry assumed he'd gone to hang out with Ginny.
"Hey, you want to go for a walk?" Harry asked from the open door.
Ron gave him the same suspicious look. Harry wished he knew what he'd done. He brought his hand to his arm and pushed on the cuts. He deserved there suspicion. He'd lied to them. This might be the last time he talked to Ron as his friend. The thought gutted him. He felt a lump forming in his throat as Ron finally nodded.
They collected Hermione and headed out the back door. Walking through the yard, he thought about how lovely this place was. Harry loved the Burrow. It had always been so cozy and relaxing here, even when more of the kids still lived at home.
He bit his lip to keep the tears at bay. If Ron pushed him away this would be the last time he was here. All the other goodbyes this summer had been painful. This one would hurt the most though. He wasn't sure that the adults would still support him. Despite what they kept saying. But Ron had always been there. They had their arguments, but Harry knew that even in those moments he could count on Ron when it mattered. This might be the end of that. The end of the pseudo- family he'd found in the Weasley's.
They settled under a tree. Silence hanging thickly in the air. He'd thought about them a lot this summer. How they might have reacted to a situation, or a question he had for Hermione, or even wishing he could just hang out with them. He hadn't been a particularly good friend this summer. He'd had opportunities to write them. He probably could have even floo called. He just didn't know what to say.
There were so many things hanging between them now though. Perhaps this would have been easier as a letter.
He swallowed thickly. They had always been by his side. Despite the spotlight forced on him they had always seen him.
He sighed at that thought. They really hadn't ever seen him. They'd never seen the freak that lived under this mask.
Pushing on his cuts again he glanced over at his friends. They seemed lost in thought as well.
He didn't want them to see it. He didn't want to show them now either. He was hurting so much right now. He just wanted things to be like they always were. It wasn't an option though. They knew just enough. They would have questions, and he didn't want to lie to them anymore.
Would they still care about him when they understood what had happened this summer? Would they still love him despite the ways this summer had changed him? Maybe they had never loved him. Maybe it was a lie he'd told himself to keep going.
He bit his lip and hoped he was wrong.
Harry closed his eyes and sighed.
"Ron has been teaching me to fly." Hermione finally said, breaking the long silence.
He raised his head and looked at his friend before smiling. He was thankful that it was something about their summer and not his. He wanted to hear it all.
"Thought you were afraid of flying." Harry said with a smirk.
Hermione shrugged.
"What's life without a little risk. It's probably a good skill to have." Hermione said.
Harry nodded. Hermione was always so practical. He flew because he loved it, so did Ron and Draco.
"Are you enjoying it?" Harry asked.
Hermione laughed a little.
"It's still a little scary but I'm getting used to it, I think." Hermione answered.
Harry nodded.
"I think I'm enjoying learning chess more. Though I still think it's barbaric that the pieces smash each other." Hermione said with a half-smile.
Harry smiled a little. He glanced up and found Ron just studying him. He looked down at the grass in front of him and gently brushed his fingers through it as he thought.
"Sorry I haven't written much this summer. I…There was just a lot, and I didn't know what to say." Harry finally acknowledged the unspoken feeling hanging around them.
"We understand." Hermione said.
He knew she didn't really, but he appreciated the sentiment none the less.
"If you guys have questions you might as well ask." Harry said softly.
They sat quietly for a few minutes before Ron cleared his throat.
"Were…Well…" Ron started before shaking his head and sighing.
Harry caught a glance between his friends before Ron seemed to steady himself.
"Were your relatives hurting you? Is that why you ran away?" Ron asked quietly.
Harry felt like he'd been hit in the chest with a Bludger.
He wondered who had told them or if they'd overheard or just guessed. It didn't matter. It was in the past now. He promised himself he would be as honest as he could with them.
He kept his head down and nodded.
There were a few minutes of silence before Hermione laid her hand on his arm. He tried not to flinch away. It was just below where he'd cut, and he didn't want her to realize. The last thing he needed was for them to find out and tell Mrs. Weasley.
"We're sorry that happened to you Harry. We don't need to talk about it but know were always here for you. For anything. If you need to talk about it, we'll listen." Hermione said softly.
His throat felt tight.
"Thanks." Harry said softly around the lump in his throat.
"Of course, Harry. You know were always here." Ron chipped in.
Harry looked up and met both of their eyes and could see mostly concern. They were being honest. Right now, they really meant it. He hoped it wouldn't change.
"So, tell us something about this summer. We haven't seen you in three months. You must have some stories." Ron said relaxing back against his outstretched arms.
Harry nodded and smiled softly.
"Yeah, I've got a few." Harry said.
He suddenly heard a soft mew and saw Edgar cutting through the grass. He'd let him out before they'd had lunch.
Harry smiled softly.
"Aww. Kitten." Hermione cooed.
Harry reached out and scooped up the kitten and set him in his lap.
"This is Edgar." Harry said with a smile.
"He's yours?" Hermione asked as she reached out to pet him.
Harry nodded and began to tell how he'd met Edgar in the park. He left out his Animagus form for now. He told them about the jobs he'd worked and the friends he'd made. About his interactions with the Hufflepuffs this summer and about the boy he'd saved. He told them all the good parts. He was laughing and smiling brightly by the end.
"That sounds amazing Harry. I'm glad you had such an enjoyable time." Hermione said.
Harry nodded. He knew it was a heavily edited version, but it was a start. Apparently, they'd been told that Sirius was alive and that he and Remus were his new guardians. They were both incredibly happy for him. He glossed over most of his time with them. It had been a tough time. He did tell them about the camping trip though.
"I love camping. My parents usually take me every summer. We didn't have much time together this year." Hermione said sadly.
Harry gave her a sympathetic look before he considered telling her about what had been happening with their classmates.
He started with talking about finding Justin and then about Katie, Dennis, and Colin. They were understandably upset.
He took a deep breath before he launched into the story about Tim. They both looked shocked at Draco's heroics.
"So, Malfoy just set them on fire and ran out of there with Tim?" Ron asked.
Harry nodded.
"He was in pretty rough shape when Snape found him. He came to stay at the house after that." Harry said.
There were some glances between them and then Hermione turned back to Harry.
"Are…well, er…are you friends with him now?" Hermione asked.
Harry took a deep breath. He really wanted to keep being friends with Draco, but worried he'd lose his friendship with Ron and Hermione if he said that.
Finally, he nodded.
"Yes." Harry said softly.
"I know it's hard to understand but, I think finally seeing what that side of the war is really about changed him." Harry said.
He knew Draco was struggling. Even though it wasn't the same way he was struggling, he hoped Draco knew he wasn't alone. Alone felt awful.
He looked up and studied their faces. He knew that they'd both been hurt by Draco and wouldn't necessarily be willing to just accept him.
Hermione nodded.
"It's changing all of us." Hermione said.
Harry sighed and nodded. It was true.
Ron looked annoyed but no longer angry.
"I can't say I understand but, it's not my place to tell you who to be friends with." Ron said.
Harry nodded. He supposed it was a more mature response then he'd expected, even if it was still a little cold.
Harry fidgeted with his hands a little, then pet Edgar and set him in the grass to chase bugs.
"I er…I need to tell you guys something." Harry said softly.
They both looked at him expectantly and he sighed.
"I'm sorry I kept this from you both, but I didn't know until last summer and I…I just didn't want it to be a thing." Harry said softly.
Harry took a deep breath before he shifted into base form. He looked up to his friends to find them looking at him in shock.
"You're a metamorphmagus?" Hermione asked, leaning closer to him.
Harry nodded.
"Wicked." Ron said, also leaning closer.
Harry's cheeks blushed brightly under there scrutiny. This had been the reaction he'd been hoping to avoid. Metamorphmagus drew to much attention. He supposed if you chose to lean into it like Tonks, it could be a good thing. For someone like him who wished he could just be invisible it made him feel very exposed.
"Wish we would have known that back when we brewed the Polyjuice." Ron said pulling a face.
Harry allowed himself to smile a little. He supposed Ron had a point.
"Is this a form you've been taking this summer? You kind of look like a mix of Sirius and Remus." Ron commented.
Harry bit his lip.
"This is my base form. This is what I really look like. And yeah…I um…My parents did a kind of blood adoption. Sirius and Remus are also my parents." Harry said quietly. He still felt weird about it but he was getting more used to the idea.
They both studied him for another few minutes. Hermione smiled.
"I like it. I think this look suits you really well. You're very handsome Harry." Hermione said.
Harry blushed even darker.
Ron snorted.
"Hey now, your boyfriend is right here." Ron said gently, bumping Hermione's shoulder.
Ron smiled widely and looked lovingly at Hermione. He was glad Ron was making jokes. It helped lighten the mood and alleviated the anxiety he'd been feeling earlier. Ron could be very jealous, and he didn't want that to taint their friendship.
Hermione rolled her eyes.
"You look good mate. Though I wouldn't let mum see your hair that long. She's already threatening to cut mine." Ron said with a laugh, grabbing at his slightly shaggy hair.
Harry laughed softly and shifted back.
He considered how to break the next piece of news. He felt like they might be more upset about his Animagus because it was something he chose to do.
"I…um…I also became an Animagus. I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys…It…just…it was something I was doing with Sirius and I…I don't know. It just felt special that it was just something between us." Harry said softly.
Hermione gave him a tight smile and nodded her understanding.
He looked to Ron who was giving him a strange look.
"Well go on then. Lets see." Ron said with a laugh.
Harry sighed and shifted.
The looks on there faces were almost comical.
"Wow. You're big." Ron said standing up.
He reached out to touch the top of Harry's head and he ducked at the raised hand. He huffed. Ron wasn't a threat. He was just too wound up.
He stood and walked to Ron before bumping Ron's hand with his nose. Ron smiled and gave him a gentle pat.
Harry walked to Hermione, and she smiled.
"It's really amazing Harry." She said raising her hand and petting his head.
Harry stepped back and shifted.
He smiled at his friends. So far everything had been working out okay. They seemed fairly understanding.
He only had one more thing to tell them and he was worried about how they would take it. He wanted to tell them about what had happened at Crup Creek. He wasn't going to tell them about the Horcruxes, or his self-harm and he definitely wasn't going to tell them about his suicide attempt. They didn't need any of that weighing them down.
He also didn't plan to talk about his life at the Dursley's. Them knowing it was worse then he'd always let on was enough.
He wouldn't tell them about Crup Creek either. Except that it was almost certainly going to get brought up. Susan was there friend and in the DA. He also had the matter of the Lordships to address with Pansy and Teddy. There wasn't much getting around telling them.
Harry sighed as he started to tell them about his visions. Then he explained how he and Draco had gone to save Susan and her aunt. He had a hard time talking about it and could nearly taste the blood as he explained what he had done.
He was a killer. He'd orphaned Teddy. He wondered if this would be the last straw for them.
He sat quietly as he waited for them to say something.
"That's awful." Hermione said sympathetically.
Harry nodded. He could feel tears threatening to fall and pulled up his occlumency shield more.
"I guess I kind of understand why your friends with Malfoy now. I mean I think our friendship kind of started with a troll and only get stronger every time we have to deal with some kind of life-or-death situation. I still can't quite put everything he's said in the past but I'm glad he had your back." Ron said.
Harry looked up and felt relieved at what they'd said.
Ron had really grown up this summer. It was obvious that having Hermione around was helping him.
"What's going on with Snape though? I saw you hug him before he left." Ron said, confusion clear on his face.
Harry blushed brightly. He still felt really uncomfortable with touch and was really working on accepting it more. Ron was asking a reasonable question but now Harry felt like he'd done something wrong. Maybe he had.
He pushed gently on the fresh cuts. He closed his eyes and focused on the pain. He deserved the pain. Touch was wrong. He was dirty and no one should touch him.
When Harry opened his eyes, he caught a look he didn't understand passing between his friends.
Harry bit his lip, thinking of how to explain what had happened with Snape without breaking their rules. He couldn't tell them about Snape and his mother. He also didn't really want to talk about just how fucked up he really was and how Snape had been helping him overcome some of that.
"I can't really explain. I think getting out of the school let us both be more ourselves, and I discovered the real Snape isn't…well he's actually a pretty decent person. He even helped brew and new potion for Remus." Harry said with a slight smile.
His friends looked a little bewildered, but he didn't have anything else to say on the matter. He was thankful to have Snape in his life this summer. He didn't know if he would interact much with him this year since he wouldn't be in his class, but it had been exceedingly kind of him to offer to let him come to him if he needed to.
They sat quietly for a while longer just enjoying the warm summer afternoon. They seemed to realize he wasn't going to explain more.
"We should go for a fly. We've probably still got a while before dinner." Ron suggested.
Harry smiled. He couldn't wait to get back on his broom.
He bit his lip and considered.
"Can I invite Draco to join us?" Harry asked hesitantly.
Ron seemed to consider for a moment but eventually nodded.
They all headed back to the house. Harry mostly felt lighter now that he wasn't hiding so much from his friends. The conversation had been difficult though and despite his relief that his friends weren't pushing him away, he felt overwhelmed by the events of this summer.
He hoped going flying would help distract him from his thoughts, which were decidedly dark.
Severus groaned as they continued their search of the house. They weren't finding anything. The house, if you could call it that, was little more then a shack. It was falling apart and extremely dirty. They had tried using a few spells to locate the Horcrux, but nothing had shown up.
As he walked across the floor, he felt the board under him sag slightly more then the others. He stepped back and noticed a small hole in the wood like where a knot might have been.
"Albus." Severus called as he knelt next to the board.
"Did you find something?" Albus asked as he approached.
"Perhaps a loose floorboard." Severus said.
Albus nodded and raised his wand. He cast several detection spells and Severus groaned as the board glowed a slight red color.
"I think it's an alarm ward." Albus said.
"We should take the plank off quickly. If the Horcrux is in there grab it and get out of here quickly." Albus suggested.
Severus nodded.
He hesitantly reached for the board and pulled it back. He was thankful when nothing happened.
Lighting the tip of his wand he looked into the space and found a small wooden box.
"There's a box." Severus said, just as several cracks of apparition sounded outside.
Severus looked up in alarm.
"Grab it. We need to leave." Albus said hurriedly, grabbing Minerva's arm.
Severus took a deep breath and grabbed the box. White hot pain shot through his arm like an electrical current.
He screamed and a moment later he felt Albus grab his shoulder for Fawkes to flash them back to Hogwarts. The last thing he was aware of was the sound of splintering wood. The door being broken down he thought.
Draco was genuinely smiling as he climbed into bed. Harry had come up and invited him to come flying. He'd been hesitant to join, but he really wanted to try out his new broom.
It was amazing.
They'd flown around for what felt like ages. He'd been worried about spending time with the Gryffindor's. While it wasn't as comfortable as spending time with his own friends, it wasn't as bad as he'd expected. Draco had even let the others try out his new broom.
By the time Mrs. Weasley had called them all in for dinner they were mostly on a first name basis. Except for him and Ron. He'd even quietly apologized to Hermione when they'd both been left on the ground alone. She'd seemed hesitant to accept but had in the end. They'd started a discussion on ancient runes and their love of the subject.
Their quiet conversation seemed to have lowered tensions in the whole group. He'd never had many interactions with Weasley's sister or her boyfriend Dean. Both seemed to mostly accept him after watching him and Harry interact.
It was interesting to watch actually. They all seemed to look to Harry as a leader. Though it was obvious Harry was very self-conscious about excepting such a roll. He knew Harry had been the leader of the secret dueling club they'd broken up last year. Though after watching his interactions, it seemed like something the others had likely talked him into.
Dinner was wonderful. Now full and freshly washed, he was looking forward to a good night's sleep.
Harry hadn't come back from the loo yet. He'd been in there for a while and Draco was starting to worry about him. He'd seemed a little off all day. He wondered if Harry was anxious to go back to Diagon. Draco still didn't know what had happened but whatever it was it had shaken Harry pretty badly. He committed to sticking close to him tomorrow.
Harry bit his lip as he dug the razor blade into his arm again. The water from the shower rained down on him, but he paid it no mind. The conversation with Ron and Hermione had gone better then he had expected. He'd been able to get everyone to get along while they flew. However, as they'd been excused from the table Mrs. Weasley had reminded them that they'd need to be up early for their trip to Diagon.
Harry had felt like his stomach had dropped through the floor at that announcement. He knew they were going but he'd let himself forget today while he'd been busy with other things.
"Fuck." Harry cursed softly, as he dropped the blade and stared at his arm.
He didn't understand why he'd done this to himself. It had been his default for years to deal with the stress and shame he lived with. This last year he'd been good though. And despite his suicide attempt he hadn't actually cut much this summer.
He was so afraid to go back to Diagon though. What if Rick found him again? What if he couldn't get away from him?
He felt his breath catch in his chest. His heart was pounding, and his vision was blurring. He couldn't go through it again. He couldn't. Snape and George had both promised they wouldn't let it happen again. How could they stop it though?
A sob bubbled back up. Clearly, he wasn't doing as well as he thought he was after his last run in with Rick. He'd tried so hard to just push it all away. To pretend it hadn't happened. Nothing really had happened. It was stupid that it was upsetting him so much.
His jaw clenched in anger at himself. He was such a freak.
He grabbed the blade again and made several more cuts. He watched his blood swirl with the water and tried to focus on nothing but that and the pain. Slowly his panic began to recede, and he felt like he could breathe again.
He balled his hands into fists as he looked at the mess he'd made of himself. Pulling himself to his feet, he vanished the blade. He grabbed his washcloth and the soap and began to aggressively scrub every inch of his body. He felt disgusting as his mind flooded with painful memories.
When he was done his body was red and sore and he had red patches all over where he'd scrubbed himself raw or scratched at his skin too harshly.
He pulled his wall up nearly all the way and got out of the shower. He cast a cleaning spell at the space and got into his pajamas. He felt numb as he collected his clothes from the day and his toiletries and made his way back to the room.
Draco was already asleep, for which he was thankful. He couldn't handle a conversation right now. Putting everything away, he climbed into bed. As he lay back on the pillow, he realized it smelt like George. He rolled so his face was buried in the familiar and comforting scent.
Waving his hand, he cast a silencing charm before he lowered his walls and sobbed into the pillow. He hated himself for being so weak. Some savior the magical world had picked, he thought morosely.
Remus stood anxiously outside there hotel door. He'd dressed in his new tux and was now waiting for Sirius. It was very late, nearly midnight. He didn't understand why Sirius had made these plans so late, but he had agreed. He felt bad for the poor witch that was preforming the wedding ritual. Melody had seemed like a sweet girl and Remus thought she would work well for there quick wedding.
They hadn't called Harry today and as predicted they'd been terribly busy. Sirius wanted them to go out this morning and get 'polished', as he'd called it. They had both gotten haircuts and Remus had gotten a shave. Sirius had even trimmed up his facial hair which looked very nice.
They'd had a nice lunch in a little café close to the hotel. Then Sirius had dragged him to a jewelry store of all things.
He ran his finger gently across the ring he already wore. Sirius had insisted on them buying wedding rings despite Remus' protests at the unnecessary cost. Sirius had just laughed and made a joke about the Black fortune and his mother rolling over in her grave if she knew what he was spending it on.
Remus had often wondered if part of his appeal to Sirius was that he was a werewolf. He was a man. He was a half-blood. All the things his parents never would have approved of. He knew Sirius had been betrothed to another pure blood when he was a small child. Sirius never talked about it and Remus never asked.
Remus took a deep breath and shook his head. Befriending him may have been an act of rebellion against his parents, but he knew that there relationship wasn't. Sirius loved him. It shined in Sirius' eyes every time he looked at him.
A smile crept across his lips as he thought of all the wonderful moments that they'd had on this trip. He thought he might like to come back some day.
The door finally opened and suddenly Remus couldn't see.
"What is this?" Remus chuckled as he raised his hand to the conjured blindfold.
"I want it to be a surprise." Sirius whispered in his ear as he took Remus's hand.
Remus smiled softly.
"You're getting to see me." Remus tried to protest.
"Yes, I am. You look very handsome." Sirius said, leaning in and kissing his cheek.
Remus blushed a little. Sirius still seemed to be able to pull that reaction from him.
"Are you ready?" Sirius asked, giving his hand a squeeze.
"Yes." Remus answered.
He felt Sirius hand grasp his tighter and then the squeeze of apparition.
Remus felt his feet hit the ground and tried to gather his bearings, while still being blindfolded. He focused on his other senses. They certainly weren't inside as he had expected. The air here was crisp and breezy. The smell on the wind was very earthy. They must be near a forest. He could smell the slight decay of leaves and moss. There was also water nearby but further away than the forest. The smell was faint but pleasant.
He felt Sirius' hand come up to his face and gently rub at his cheek.
"Ready Love?" Sirius asked softly.
Remus nodded and the blindfold was pulled away. He blinked slightly at the unexpected light. With the late hour he expected it to be darker.
Sirius took a step back and Remus took in the sight. Sirius looked amazing. He wore a dark blue vest and pants. His white shirt made the color pop and over the top he wore a matching jacket with tails. The jacket had silver embellishments on it. It was the nicest outfit he'd ever seen Sirius in. His hair hung in silky waves to his shoulders and Remus wanted to run his fingers through it.
He was so taken by how wonderful Sirius looked he hadn't noticed what was behind him. He looked up and realized they actually were standing in a forest. There was a clearing in front of them and hung in the trees were fairy lights. There were also beautiful wildflowers laying around the edge of the circle and rose petals making up a path to the far end, where he noticed Melody standing.
Remus nearly laughed when he noticed the record player sitting near her feet off to one side.
"What do you think?" Sirius asked a little nervously.
Remus smiled widely.
"It's wonderful Siri. I never imagined this would happen for us. Thank you." Remus said, his voice getting a little choked up as he looked at the beautiful wedding Sirius had planned.
Sirius smiled and held out his arm for Remus to take.
Remus nodded and took his arm. Sirius nodded to the witch who waved her wand at the record player. The music began to play as Sirius led them across the small clearing.
"Oh, my love. My darling. I've hungered for your touch. A long, lonely time."
Remus smiled softly as the music played. It was painful to think of all the years they'd been forced to spend alone. The song felt like a ballad made just for them in this moment.
"And time goes by so slowly. And time can do so much. Are you still mine?"
Remus felt the beginning of tears prick his eyes. He hadn't known for all the time they'd spent at Grimmauld if Sirius was still his. They hadn't ever talked about it. Feeling Sirius kiss him the night he'd shown up at the cabin had felt like the only place he ever wanted to be again.
"I need your love. I need your love. God speed your love to me."
He would always need Sirius' love. It felt like the only thing that kept him going some days.
"Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea. To the open arms of the sea. Yes, lonely rivers sigh, 'Wait for me, wait for me. I'll be coming home, wait for me.'"
Sirius had come home. He'd come back to him when Remus had lost hope that they'd ever see each other again.
Remus took a shaky breath as a tear spilled down his cheek. When they stopped in front of Melody, Remus reached up and wiped his face quickly before she turned off the music and they turned to face each other.
"Good evening gentlemen. I know you've both written your own words of commitment. Sirius would you like to go first?" Melody asked.
Remus saw Sirius nod and reach into his pocket. He expected parchment like he had in his own but instead Sirius pulled out a pocket watch. He looked at it for a moment and then turned it for Remus to see.
The time was now twelve o one.
Remus glanced up from the watch to Sirius face. He was looking back at the watch before tucking it away and looking up at Remus.
"Twenty-five years ago, today was the last day I didn't know you. The last day I didn't know your friendship. Your kindness. Your beautiful eyes. Your wonderful smile. I've spent twenty-five years of my life knowing you were my person. The one who saw me and accepted me just the way I was. Those years have been far from perfect." Sirius said, taking a deep breath.
"I didn't know then that my heart would always belong to you. I didn't know then that no matter what, you were always going to be the person I needed in my life. I've made mistakes. Some really bad ones in my life. Thoughtless mistakes that have cost us nearly everything. But not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. I spent those long years away from you wishing I could just see you one more time. Wishing I could hold you just one more time." Sirius continued.
Remus could feel a lump forming in his throat and blinked back tears.
"For the last twenty-five years you have been my rock in the storm. You've kept me grounded. Kept me going. Kept me from losing myself completely. I love you Remus. I always have. Even before I was willing to accept it, I loved you. You are the kindest, most gentle person I've ever known. I want to love you for the rest of my life. I want to protect you from the pain of this world and be there for all the ups and downs life is going to throw at us. Forever." Sirius finished.
Remus smiled at the beautiful words. He loved Sirius so much, sometimes it was almost painful.
He cleared his throat and pulled the letter from his pocket.
"I wrote this as a goodbye when I was worried how the new potion would work. When I thought of what I wanted to say to you today I realized I'd already written it all down." Remus started as he unfolded the letter.
"I spent years of my life believing that the only life for me was alone. That my life would just be the passing of time between the pain of the moons. I never imagined a career or friends or love. You showed me all of that was possible for me." Remus said swallowing thickly as he tried to stay composed.
"You never shied away from me. Not even after you learned my secret. You loved me as a friend. Supported me. You became a pack for me to keep me safe. Even from myself." Remus said.
"No matter how bad things got I knew you were there for me. You healed more then just my body. My mind, heart, and soul are soothed by you. I never feel more at home than when I'm with you. I never feel more content with my life than in the quiet moments with you." Remus continued.
He took a deep breath and looked up to find Sirius smiling happily at him.
"I never want to be apart from you again. Nothing in my life feels right when you're away. I've lost you more than once, and each time feels like I won't make it another step. Like part of me leaves when you do. You're the other half of my soul, Sirius. I love you, forever." Remus finished with a whisper.
He stared at the man in front of him and couldn't imagine anywhere he'd rather be than in this moment with him.
"I love you." Sirius said softly.
"I love you too." Remus said back with a soft smile.
The heat in Sirius eyes made Remus blush.
"That was lovely. Both of you." Melody said.
"If you'll exchange rings, I'll cast the spell." Melody said pulling her wand.
Sirius reached into his pocket and produced a box before pulling the rings from it. They were simple bands, but Remus thought they were perfect.
Remus accepted the one Sirius held out. He took Sirius hand and slid the ring onto his finger before holding out his own hand.
Sirius slid the ring on his finger, then raised it to his face and kissed the back of his hand.
Remus blushed and smiled happily at Sirius.
"Mother magic see these two Wixen and bind them in magic." Melody said softly as she waved her wand over there joined hands.
Golden bands of sparkling light wove around their hands. The feeling was incredible. In that moment Remus felt like he could do anything as long as he had Sirius by his side.
The light began to fade and sink into their hands. Remus blinked as he looked away from the amazing magic and back up to Sirius.
Remus raised the hand that wasn't currently holding Sirius' hand and brushed a stray tear from Sirius' cheek. He smiled happily back before pulling Sirius body flush with his own. Their lips found each other as they shared a passionate kiss.
Sirius hands found there way to his back as Remus wove his fingers into Sirius hair and held him close.
He smiled as they pulled apart.
"Thank you, Melody." Sirius said to the witch who had taken a step back from the couple.
"Your welcome, and Congratulations." Melody said, a happy smile on her face.
She pulled the parchment from her robes and touched them with the tip of her wand. She held them out to them and Remus took them before tucked them away.
Melody nodded once more before she turned on her heal and apparated away.
Remus felt Sirius hand slide around his waist. When he looked over, he found Sirius with a mischievous smile on his face.
Remus raised an eyebrow.
"I told you I had a surprise for our Honeymoon." Sirius said.
Remus nodded. He was a little nervous about what that might be.
Sirius took Remus hand and led them back across the clearing. He waved his wand as he went. The record player and lights disappeared and in the dark, he followed Sirius. The moon was bright and lit their way well enough.
When they got to the edge of the clearing, Remus realized that the place they had apparated was actually a dirt road. Sirius led Remus down the road a little before he suddenly stopped. He waved his wand over himself, and Remus laughed when Sirius' nice clothing became a skintight black shirt and jeans. A moment later he was also dressed in similar clothing. Thankfully, Sirius had transfigured his jacket into a warmer and more comfortable jacket.
"I take it were doing something more casual." Remus said with a laugh as Sirius released his hand.
"Something more us." Sirius said waving his wand at a seemingly blank stretch of road.
Remus smiled when a motorcycle appeared with a sign on the back that said, 'just married'.
Sirius pulled his leather jacket from the seat of the bike and threw it on. Remus thought he looked terribly sexy like that. Sirius had always so flawlessly pulled off the bad boy look.
Sirius straddled the bike and looked back at him before winking.
"Come on Moony." Sirius called.
Remus smiled and nodded. It had been years since he'd ridden on the back of Sirius' bike. He felt nervous excitement course through his body as he climbed on the bike and wrapped his arms tightly around Sirius.
Sirius started the bike, and it rumbled loudly to life.
"Hold on tight." Was Remus only warning as Sirius revved the engine and they took off down the dirt road.
Remus clung tightly to Sirius. He loved being close to him like this. Honestly, this was the perfect way for them to leave their wedding.
Their wedding.
He and Sirius were married.
He smiled brightly and hugged Sirius impossibly closer to him.
Sirius felt over the moon that the wedding had gone so well. It had been just as perfect as he'd imagined. He knew Remus expected that they'd be getting married in some dark back room, but he deserved more. He deserved something special.
Remus' arms wrapped protectively around him made his heart beat happily. His warm body pressed tightly against Sirius back was putting very explicit images in his mind. He pushed the bike to go faster as they raced down the road.
He'd packed up their hotel room and checked them out. He'd rented a small lakefront cabin for them to spend tonight in before they returned to Hogwarts tomorrow. The cabin wasn't far, and he hoped Remus would enjoy it as well.
Yesterday he'd come and set everything up. They made a bend in the road and the lake came into view. The still water perfectly reflected the star filled sky. It was a beautiful view. They continued around half the lake before Sirius pulled off and up to the cabin.
He turned off the bike and held it steady while Remus climbed off. Sirius smiled at Remus as he followed. Remus was smiling happily and if filled him with joy.
"I take it we aren't going back to the hotel tonight." Remus said.
Sirius shook his head and stepped up to Remus.
"No, were all packed up. We don't have anywhere else to be until tomorrow." Sirius said softly.
Remus nodded.
Sirius shivered slightly as the wind picked up again. He missed Remus warmth.
"Cold?" Remus asked.
Sirius nodded.
"You want to head in. I'd love to have you warm me up." Sirius said with a wink.
Remus laughed.
"That was cheesy." Remus said with a smile.
Sirius shrugged before wrapping his arm around Remus' waist. Remus put his arm around his shoulders and the world felt right.
Sirius led them into the cabin and smiled softly at the happy expression that filled Remus' face as he took in the one room cabin.
Sirius had Champaign waiting for them and a meal under stasis. There were more flowers. The room was lit with candles and the soft glow reflected beautifully in Remus' eyes.
Remus turned and pulled him into a searing kiss. He slowly walked Sirius backwards until he bumped into the bed at the side of the room. Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus and pulled them both down.
"I love you." Sirius said, breaking the kiss.
"I love you too." Remus murmured as he descended on Sirius neck with a hungry gleam in his eyes.
Sirius closed his eyes and moaned softly.
This day had been perfect, Sirius thought as he basked in the attention from Remus.