Disclaimer: I do not own any of the material appearing in this story. The OC's belong to their respective owners.
While Ruby is Chewing Weiss Out
"Hmhmhmhm~" A Toad hummed as he walked through Toad Town. He came across a crosswalk as he looked both ways. Nothing on the right and nothing on the left.
He smiled as he put one foot down on the road… and then a vehicle zoomed past out of nowhere. "WHOA!" He yelped.
An SUV sped past Toad Town, accelerating faster than normal before the brakes were harshly applied as the SUV swerved and drifted into Sojiro Cafe's parking lot before coming to a complete stop.
BGM: Beneath the Mask (Persona 5)
Smoke poured out of the grill as the driver door opened up, revealing to be none other than Haru as she happily hummed, not minding the melting rubber of the tires as she opened up the passenger door and pulled out some groceries.
"Hmhmhmhm~" She hummed carefreely as fire erupted from the grill as she walked into the cafe.
"Here's the stuff you ordered, Mr. Sakura~!"
"Thanks." Sojiro nodded at her with a smile, then looked outside to see the sorry state of the vehicle. "Sheesh…"
Once the coffee was made, Haru sat down and pulled out her phone… when a shadow loomed over her as she glanced up to see Makoto folding her arms in annoyance. "Oh hey, Nijima~" She smiled sweetly.
"C'mere!" She said, grabbing her by the ear and dragging her out.
"Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow!" Haru winced, still holding her cup.
"What the hell is this?" She demanded, pointing toward the SUV with the hood currently on fire.
"Oh… Oh my goodness! Did I forget to turn on the AC?"
"NO! It's not that…" Makoto groaned. "You know how Ann and I spent some time in the Golden Plains trying to look for a damn Gold Flower so we can buy a car so we don't have to always rely on Morgana outside of Mementos?"
"Yeah?"
"And we found the perfect SUV in Mushroom City, fitting all of us in?"
"Yeah…?"
"WHY THE HELL IS IT IN FLAMES AND THE TIRES HAVE MELTED?!"
"Must be a faulty engine."
"No! It's not…" Makoto sighed in defeat. "You really gotta work on your lead foot… the last time you drove Morgana, he was sore the next day…"
"He probably forgot to stretch."
Haru sighed. "Okay, okay… sorry Nijima… I just really love to drive and feel the absolute freedom while driving."
"I get it… driving is a lot of fun but you can't just rocket your way through everything. You're lucky you didn't hit anybody this time!"
"Come on, last time I ran somebody over, it was a Grimm." Haru said before it dawned on her. "...Oh… that would explain Mona's bandages…"
How the hell you even passed the driver's test is still a mystery… Makoto thought.
"Soooo… we gonna buy a new one? I'm sure we can just get a Gold Flower from Nanami, she's loaded with that stuff. How do you think she can get all those games?"
"Wait, really? I always thought Nanami was secretly super rich from a super rich fami-... oh, that's not the point! Besides, we have Fix-it Felix. We'll just get him and repair the damages."
Haru groaned. "What am I gonna do… you're the better driver out of all of us."
"I do have to wonder why Sojiro asked you to get stuff for him."
"Because, according to him, I bring stuff to him the fastest out of all of us."
Makoto sweatdropped. "Yeah… that checks out…" She mumbled before an idea came to her. "Wait a minute…"
"What's up?"
"I got an idea. Wait here, okay?" Makoto took off running.
"Oh. Okay." Haru nodded as she turned around to continue drinking her coffee… right as the SUV exploded. "Ooooh…" She grimaced as she walked away with a not-so-innocent whistle.
Pause BGM
Meanwhile…
BGM: Take Over (Persona 5 Royal)
Joker grabbed a hold of the Smash Ball, glowing with energy as a stunned Mega Man was trying to snap out of his daze.
"Ravage them!" He said as he lunged forward, cutting through Mega Man where he was then joined by Ann, Ryuji and Yusuke where all of them starting beating up the poor robot.
"Time for some brutality!" Morgana said.
Joker landed on the ground, casually pulling back his glove as liquid shot out of Mega Man from behind him.
End BGM
"GAME! Joker… wins!"
"Heh…" Joker chuckled as he and Mega Man were transported out of the stage, then he took off his mask and approached Mega Man. "Good fight out there."
"You too." Mega Man said, giving him a smile as he walked off, then he turned around and high fived his friends.
"There you guys are!" Makoto approached them. "We got a problem."
Resume Beneath the Mask BGM
"What is it?" Ann asked.
"Soooo… you know how we got that SUV so we don't always have to rely on Morgana outside of Mementos? …No offense, Mona."
"Ah, all was forgiven when you showed me the seats have back massagers… aaaah… bliss~" Morgana sighed heavenly.
"What about it? …Wait, don't tell me someone hijacked it!" Ann groaned.
"No, it wasn't a carjacker, thankfully."
"Oh thank good-"
"Haru drove it."
"...OH NO." Ann groaned.
"Okay, what's the damage? It can't seriously be that bad." Ryuji said.
"Was the paint chipped from the high speed? I'm sure a little paint job wouldn't hurt." Yusuke said.
"The tires melted, the engine was on fire and by the time I ran off to get you guys, it exploded."
"...Oh. We're gonna need a lot more paint." Yusuke grimaced.
"That sounds about right…" Akechi nodded.
"So, you have any ideas?" Akira asked.
"I do have one… one where I think might be the perfect solution for Haru's lead foot." Makoto smirked.
Back at Sojiro's…
"Golly gee… again?" Felix wondered, rubbing his head as he held his hammer.
"Yeah… my foot is perpetually iron…" Haru mumbled, pressing her index fingers together. "I'm like a whole different person when I'm behind the wheel… I don't even know how to fix it."
"Oh, I'm sure you'll figure something out." He said as he hammered the vehicle, restoring it within seconds, then he opened up the hood to fix everyone on the inside before opening the doors and fixing everything inside.
"Huh…?" Felix wondered as he opened the trunk. "What's with this multi-colored liquid?"
"Huh? …Oh no, the ice cream! I thought I brought that in!" Haru said before sighing, anime tears rolling down her cheeks. "Goodbye, rainbow sherbet, you were so young…"
At that moment, a paper airplane flew by and landed on the ground near her.
"Hmm?"
Haru picked it up, opening the airplane to see a message.
"You want fun and adventure? Come to this address.
PS: Go to the Warp Pipe near the Belladonna and Schnee home, then take the first pipe next to the exit."
"Oooh, a mystery~!" She smiled as she took off running, but then another paper airplane dropped by.
"PPS: Stop by Metallic Ivories Boutique first."
"Ah, the collab with Mioda and Akamatsu? Okay~!" She ran off.
Back with the others…
"That will get her attention." Yusuke said.
"You let them know, right?" Makoto asked.
"Hai."
"Good."
"You think we should have Nanami over, just to get her mind off things for a bit?" Ryuji asked.
"I was thinking the same thing. I'll be right back~!" Ann ran off.
End BGM
Meanwhile…
"Breathe slowly as you hold this pose." Wii Fit Trainer said calmly, her eyes closed as her heel was over her head in a straight light, her arm arching over her head and touching her toes while standing on one foot.
As for Chiaki, she was sweating nonstop with her eyes screaming "So this is how I die…" as she was struggling to hold herself.
Do some yoga with Wii Fit, I thought… it'd be relaxing, I thought!
Her cheeks were puffed out, her face was red and sweat ran down her head.
Naturally athletic after using her abilities was one thing… but naturally limber like Samus, Min Min, Tifa, Ann, Akane, Aoi or even Daisy, she was not.
Is this how I die…? Death by yoga?!
"I wonder if I'm doing it right…" Elfilin said, trying his best but being unsuccessful while BB-8 let out a few dejected boops.
"Hoo… hoo… hoo hoo hoo hoo…!" Chiaki desperately tried to breathe through the pose.
"Aaaaand slowly return to your original position."
Chiaki collapsed as she tried to do so, falling on the soft matted ground. Her leg and muscles that she didn't even know she had were screaming in agony.
Wii Fit Trainer approached Chiaki with a concerned expression. "You okay?"
"I can do the tree pose just fine… Warrior is simple along the other poses… but that… what the hell was that?" Chiaki breathed.
"I'll admit… I forgot you're not as limber as the other ladies. You did the tree pose flawlessly and… well…" She chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry about that."
"Oh… you're fine…" Chiaki panted.
"But on the bright side, you felt quite the burn, no?"
"Oh, I felt something…"
Wii Fit offered her hand, where Chiaki took it once her leg stopped being on fire. She then noticed Chiaki rubbing her shoulder. "Sore?"
"Yeah, did some boxing earlier. Probably should have stretched first…" Chiaki laughed sheepishly.
"I have just the thing for you."
Wii Fit turned around and walked over to a stack of boxes. "I had just ordered these online for anyone feeling a bit sore during a Smash Match or in the Mario Bros and RWBY's case, fighting Bowser. Heck, I just gave one to Mac and Doc Louis earlier."
"What is it?"
"Ta-dah~! A massage gun!"
"...That's a thing?"
"Yes." She nodded, turning it on as they both watched the ball on the gun started to vibrate.
She then got behind Chiaki and applied it to her shoulder.
"Ooooooh mmmmyyyy…!" Chiaki said, feeling blissful from the ball pounding her shoulder as if she was getting massaged by a person.
"Curious…" Elfilin mused as Wii Fit tried it on him next. "Oooooh, that feels gooooood!"
Wii Fit giggled, handing it back to Chiaki. "You might want to hide this from Crazy Hand. Knowing him, he'd turn this into an item and… make it whacky."
"That explains why I'm seeing "dumbbells" written on the boxes." Chiaki said.
"Mhm." She nodded. "Master Hand used it himself and he enjoyed it, but even he admits he needs to hide it from his brother."
Inside Chiaki's imagination…
"Hup!" Toon Link grabbed the Massage Gun and pressed the button, causing a boxing glove to come out and repeatedly punched Pit in the face.
"Ooof! Ow! Ow! Ooof! Gah!"
Suddenly, the boxing glove disappeared… only for a gorilla hand to appear and slugged Pit in the face, sending him flying.
Toon grinned. "Oh, I like this!"
In reality…
"Yeeeeah… definitely need to hide this." Chiaki grimaced.
She opened up a rift and hid it inside, closing it up.
"That'll do!" Chiaki smiled.
"That works."
Chiaki started to walk out with Elfilin and BB-8. "See ya around!"
"See ya, Chiaki!" Wii Fit waved as Chiaki walked out of her studio and headed for her room, humming to herself.
"Hey girlfriend!" A voice called out as she turned to see Ann approaching her.
"Oh hey, Takamaki!" Chiaki smiled warmly. "What's up?"
"I came to come get ya to get your mind off things regarding… you know who."
"Yeah, definitely need that… what's up?"
"Well, you know how Okumura has a lead foot?"
"...Don't tell me… she got arrested for speeding."
"Thankfully, no! But, there's something better that Nijima had thought of."
"That being?"
Ann smiled. "Mario Kart."
"Oh, she took up Mario Kart? Well, I could give her a few pointers-"
"Not the game, but real life!"
"Ah, cool… wait… WHAT?!"
Later…
"I still can't believe you two managed to combine a store involving music and fashion…" Ryuji said.
"Well, Ibuki and I thought it'd be a good idea to own a music store with our shared love of music, but she also wanted to have a clothing store since she's also a tailor." Kaede explained.
"Soooo… Ibuki thought "Why the hell not" and created a store for music and clothing!" Ibuki grinned.
"Well, it's certainly unique." Makoto said. "Though, I'm curious about the name."
"Mettalic: short for Metallica. Fitting for Ibuki!" Ibuki said proudly.
"Ivories: My absolute love for ivory keys on pianos." Kaede sighed heavenly.
"Metallica… yeah, I should have figured." Akira chuckled.
"Aaaand! And and and! Ibuki introduced Metallica to Kaede-chan! Not only that, but she also introduced her to KISS and AC/DC."
"And how'd she take it?" Akechi wondered.
Kaede formed her hands into the rock and roll signs. "Party hard~" She giggled. "Though, I do question that one man's desire to smash those perfectly good guitars into the ground…"
"It's his thing." Ibuki said.
"Clearly…" Kaede sweatdropped.
The door opened, the bell ringing as they turned to see Ann walking in with Chiaki. "I got her!"
"Hey Chiaki-chan~!" Ibuki greeted warmly.
"Hey doofus." Chiaki greeted back with a teasing smile.
"Oh, is this Chiaki that I've heard so much about?" Kaede asked.
"Yup yup!" Ibuki nodded.
Kaede smiled. "I have to say, she's a lot cuter in person!" She gave her a friendly wink.
Chiaki blushed. "Oh… thank you. You're… cute too." She said, both smiling.
"Ah, hitting it off already… perfect~!" Ibuki giggled.
"Oh! And who's this cute little hamster?" Kaede asked, looking at Elfilin.
"Hello~! I'm Elfilin but my friends call me Elfi! …Wait, what's a hamster?"
Kaede looked down. "Oh, and this must be your robot companion. BB-8, right?"
BB-8 booped, giving her the thumbs up.
Kaede giggled. "Adorable~"
"Soooo… what's this about Haru doing real life Mario Kart?"
"I figured it'd be a healthier way for her to let the wind blow through her hair and not cause any laws to be broken." Makoto explained. "Not to mention none of us suffering any heart attacks when we're with her."
"I apologize if I do!" Haru said from within the changing room. "By the way, I'm ready~!"
She opened up the curtains.
BGM: Everyday Days (Persona 5)
Haru was now wearing a plain pink racing suit with an Okumura Foods logo on her chest as if it was a lapel pin. She also had a racing helmet that she was holding underneath her arm and she also had her hair up.
"How do I look?"
"Stunning!" Ann gushed.
"Goodness, I never thought she'd look cuter with her hair up…" Makoto said.
Chiaki pulled out her phone, taking a picture. "Yeah, I'm sending this to my fellow Ultimates and Futaba."
"Too late, I already sent it to her." Akira said, having taken a photo.
"Awww… well, she'll get two pics." She giggled.
"So, where to next?" Haru asked with a hint of excitement. "I have a pretty good idea of what's going on~!"
Makoto smiled. "Follow us."
"Psst. I still can't believe you managed to make something like that so dang fast." Kaede whispered to Ibuki.
"That's because she can be as fast as the plot demands it~!"
Kaede sweatdropped with a sigh. "I'll never understand your lingo…" She said, feeling Ibuki headpatting her as they walked off with the group, where Kaede flipped the open sign to "closed", then went off to catch up.
End BGM
Later…
Haru gasped, finding herself at a garage. "Ooooh my goodness!" She exclaimed, her eyes sparkling.
"Yeah, figured you'd want to make your own kart." Makoto said.
With a twinkle in her eye, Haru swiftly ran off and got to the roulette wheels.
"Dunno about you, but Ibuki's feelin' like a montage is kicking in~!"
She immediately pulled out her phone. "Let's see… what should we… ah~!"
BGM: Thunderstruck (AC/DC)
"Oh! THAT'S a good one!" Kaede nodded.
Haru rolled it around, looking for the right set up as she immediately grinned like a goofball as she had found her set up.
Once at Mario Kart Stadium…
Haru revved up the engine with her helmet on, determination and fire in her eyes.
Her set up? GLA Kart Body, Crimson Slim Tires and for her glider: Waddle Wing!
Lakitu came flying up to her, counting down before giving her the go… aaaand Haru immediately zoomed off ahead, the wind that was behind Haru was enough to make Lakitu go flying.
"You had her at 50cc to ease her into it, right?" Ann asked, seeing how fast she was going.
"Yeah, why?" Makoto wondered.
"Honestly, it's like she's doing 150cc, if not 200cc." Chiaki said.
"Wonder if she's going beyond that…" Kaede wondered.
Haru used the speed boosts to gain speed while drifting, immediately boosting off and driving forward. Her dashboard alerted her of traversing through anti-gravity, her tires adjusting for the occasion.
Not that it bothered her in the slightest as she drifted slightly before noticing a ramp on some grass. She decided to drive over the grass toward the ramp. Normally, this would slow the average racer down without the assistance of a Mushroom or Invincibility Star.
…But this is Haru we're talking about.
She tore through the grass like it was nothing and drove off the ramp, gracefully landing on the ground before heading toward the turn.
She drifted a bit before driving up and quickly made a U-Turn drift before driving down the ramp and launching off, doing a graceful flip with a giggle as her Waddle Wing glider popped out as she gently descended to the ground before making a turn near the Warp Pipes.
As she did, she drove right into a Warp Box… and came out onto another race track, finding herself at Yoshi Circuit.
"Oh cute~!" Haru giggled as she started to drift to the right and drifted again to the left. She eyeballed the scene in front of her. Either go through the curve in the tunnel or make a daring jump through a waterfall.
Haru stepped on the gas and picked up speed, jumping through the gap and through the waterfall, then landing on the road as she immediately drifted around Yoshi's nose before driving outside, going around the curves before driving ahead fast enough that the Piranha Plants didn't have time to even think about chomping Haru.
She drifted the sharp corner and hopped off the small ramp before driving straight ahead, giving a friendly wave to the Yoshicopter before drifting around the tail and driving forward before making one last drift and found herself driving into a Warp Box.
She popped out and found herself in Rock Rock Mountain. "Oooh, so this must be Alpine Pass~" She smiled as she drifted a few corners, one of the back tires dangerously close to getting off the railing, which was enough to make for her fellow Phantom Thieves to grimace even though Lakitu was on standby.
Haru nonchalantly drove into the cave. "Sumimasen, shitsureishimasu, jamadesu!" (Excuse me, pardon me, out of my way!) She said, driving past some Swoops who trying to get out of her way as she drove down a ramp and out of the cave, launching off the ramp and gliding her way down into the forest.
She gently landed before she could smack right into a fallen tree as she then drifted to the right, glancing over at a sign that said "Watch for falling rock".
"Noted." She nodded as she went up ahead and tricked off of a ramp as she went up the hill, noticing a few boulders rolling down the hill as she swerved around them before launching off of the hill and gliding her way into the Warp Box.
She found herself landing inside the starting area of Big Blue. With a smile, she continued to floor it with her lead foot permanently glued to the gas pedal, drifting her way around the corners and conveyor belts until she drove off and glider her way down into the water slide segment.
"Weeeeee~!" Haru cheered as the water pushed the speed demon forward, not that she cared in the slightest as she was having the time of her life as she drifted the corners before launching her way forward, gliding toward the final segment with sparkles in her eyes.
And the moment she landed…
"Wow! The final lap!"
Haru gripped the steering wheel as hard as she can, leaning forward as if the GLA was a motorbike, boosting her way through the conveyor belts before driving off, not caring that, at the moment, she was driving upside down.
She drifted around before she was right side up, seeing a split path up ahead as she went toward the right, drifting the corners and hitting the speed boosts as she had the biggest smile on her face as she hopped off a small ramp and saw the finish line up ahead.
She drifted a few corners before going straight ahead, sharply turning and hitting the brakes as she crossed the finish line, drifting to the side before gently stopping before hitting the railing.
End BGM
Haru let out a happy sigh, taking off her helmet and shaking her head, not seeing a Warp Box nearby where her friends approached her. She turned her head to see everyone walking to her as she gave them the brightest beaming smile ever.
"I think I have a new hobby~!"
"I think that you do." Makoto giggled as Ann vaulted over and gave Haru a massive hug, the latter returning the favor.
"I can see it now: Haru Okumura, the ultimate racer!" Kaede said with a smile.
"I can see it." Chiaki said as Ibuki nodded in agreement.
"Ultimate Racer", huh?" A voice asked. "I'll be the judge of that, hotshot."
"Hmm?" Haru turned her head as they all turned to see a green hawk walking toward them, holding a hoverboard over his arms.
"They weren't the only ones watching you."
"...This asshole?" Chiaki silently muttered, but loud enough for Ibuki to hear.
"Don't worry, Ibuki thinks Haru-chan'll cook his goose~"
"Hopefully."
"Who are you?" Haru wondered.
"Jet the Hawk, the fastest Zero Gravity rider in all of Mobius! I was just visiting the Mushroom Kingdom when I was hearing rumors of a speed demon in town… and what do I find? You."
"That'd be me~ Haru Okumura!"
"I thought so. Well, Haru… how about we determine who's the fastest of them all? Tomorrow, three o'clock. Four races on these Mario Kart tracks. We'll see who's the fastest racer of them all."
Haru's eyes sparkled at the challenge. "Okay, I accept~!"
"Whoa whoa whoa… hold up! Are you for real? You can't just waltz up and claim you're the fastest one alive to someone who's enjoying herself." Ryuji said. "Not to mention that Sonic already has that title."
"Hmph. That blue hedgehog ain't here, is he?"
"You little-"
"It's okay, Ryuji." Haru said, giving him a graceful smile, though with a small hint of sadism. "I think I'll have some fun with him~"
Meanwhile…
"Oh brother!" Crazy Hand floated over to Master Hand.
"Yes, what is it?"
"You know how you're trying to get Kazuya to join Smash yet he keeps declining?"
"I'm aware, yes…"
"Well, I was just waltzing around the neighborhood when I… saw someone of interest wandering around with a posse of friends. His hairstyle reminds me of Kazuya."
"Oh? And who might that be?"
Deadpool: Sooooo... Haru for Mario Kart 9 when?
Ibuki: Ibuki'd main her~!
I mean... you can create a Mii.
Deadpool: Eh. Booooring!
*sweat drops* Okay then... anyway, this idea came about from Flash and Cody, so props to them! Oh, and there's a poll for you to check out too!