So sorry this chapter came out much later than I would have liked, but you know the usual real life stuff coming up.
I am honestly a little embarrassed that it took this long to get to this interlude in particular, but I hope it makes up for it! Probably not, but gotta try.
:P
Big thanks to Qinlongfei for beta reading this chapter and providing important critique!
With that said, let's get this chapter started!
Interlude 9: Shield's Past
There were a lot of things that Naofumi would readily admit that he was not good at. He was not the most physically fit in his class, or the most socially active or even attractive. Naofumi was self-aware enough to admit that none of those were his area of expertise. He knew that he was more introverted and probably below average in terms of physicality. He wasn't ugly by any means, but he hadn't net himself any dates with girls his age. Those titles belonged to all his other classmates who were either lucky, hardworking or talented enough to earn it.
But math was the bane of his existence, sent from god himself to torture him on this earth for some kind of indescribable sin he committed in a past life.
Out of the entire syllabus, math was always his weakest and worst subject to deal with. He did relatively okay in Japanese, PE and home economics, though he's not sure that should be considered a major accomplishment considering how basic the lessons were half the time. He was just scrapping by in civics class with a pass most of the time, foreign languages was where he was below average due to him barely being able to speak English outside of some basic sentences. Science sucked too due to him not being able to remember all the different formulas and science trivia that always seemed to make up the majority of his tests. Math was the demon lord of all the other subjects that continuously marked his yearly report card with shame.
He was good at counting numbers and some of the more 'simple' math topics he had endured over the course of his life, but things like algebra and geometry left him completely stumped and he couldn't for the life of him grasp the information at hand.
The below average high school student looked at his paper in a mixture of frustration, anxiety and worry, as if staring at it long enough would allow him to magically come up with the answers for every question in it or he would have an awe inspiring moment of genius where he would remember how to answer it. The test had started out just like all his other ones, kinda easy at first before hitting him with some tough algebra math questions and equations that he couldn't do much for besides guess.
Okay, stay calm, stay calm. Just try to remember the lessons the teacher gave earlier in the week, I think that's what the question needs to be answered.
Naofumi reiterated in his head to calm himself, but he immediately faltered as he tried but failed to remember what exactly his teacher had covered for this test on algebra and geometry. He covered his face with his hand as he tried to resist the urge to bang his head into the table to put himself out of his misery right here and now.
Why couldn't this be a multiple choice test? Why do we have to show our work?
At least with a multiple choice question, you could work backwards from some of the answers or at least make educated guesses and prayed that you were right. When you actually had to write out your answers from start to finish, than that just added an extra layer of anxiety to Naofumi as he struggled to find the answer.
Naofumi pathetically looked at his classmates who were all laser focused on their own tests. Some of the smarter students were doing it with confidence and at a calm pace, while others seemed to be in the same boat as Naofumi was: Internally panicking at the test and trying but failing to hide said panic as they tried to figure out what to do. He looked over to one of his few long time friends, Kenji, who was doing his own test with a bored expression on his face.
Kenji wasn't exactly the top student of any of their subjects, he was an average student that didn't excel at any of them except PE. Though when comparing his grades to Naofumi's, it made him look like a genius by simple comparison.
Naofumi wondered if he stared at him long enough than he could form some kind of psychic connection and he could ask for help on how to solve this damn math problem. But Kenji wasn't even looking in his general direction so that option was clearly out, as if it ever existed in the first place.
" Eyes on your own paper Iwatani." The teacher said sharply as they passed by, making him snap back to reality.
" S-Sorry sir." Naofumi quickly apologized as he tried to refocus on his own paper and still couldn't come up with a proper answer for this question.
Naofumi decided to skip the question for now, even though it was already the third question he had skipped so far in this test. He jumped forward into the test and every question he saw was even harder than the last. Algebra, equations and a lot more math stuff that he couldn't wrap his head around. And some part of him knew that this test was going to be another failure that he'll have to present to his parents.
He could already hear the lecture he's going to get from his parents, the disappointed looks and silent treatment. How he could have totally avoided this if he had spent more time studying instead of playing those dumb games. Maybe they were right, maybe if he had spent less time playing MMO RPG games and more time studying than he wouldn't be in this situation. But whenever he tried to hunker down and study, he could never understand the material no matter how hard he tried.
He looked up at the clock that hung above the whiteboard in the classroom and he could see that he was very quickly running out of time. Every minute that passed, he could hear the ticking of the clock in his head and it seemed almost as if time was moving both slowly and quickly.
Damn it, I don't have time for this.
Out of options and time, Naofumi just started writing whatever random equations he could think of with the numbers provided to him onto the paper just so he didn't have to turn in a blank paper. Naofumi knew deep down that he was basically just throwing random shit at the wall here and knew the low chance that anything he was writing here was correct, but he stuck by the lesson he learned a long time ago that a wrong answer was better than a blank piece of paper.
Sometimes he wondered if a blank piece of paper would be less embarrassing than the crap he wrote here. But he didn't have time to ponder that as he hastily wrote down some crappy subtraction, addition and even the Pythagoras theorem tables that he was certain was not the right answer but he couldn't think of anything else to use here.
He had just finished writing on the last question when he heard the teacher's voice ring through the room. " Times up! Pens down everybody." The teacher announced before Naofumi could even get a chance to check his answers. Not like it would help considering he didn't even know how to answer them in the first place, but at least it would provide him with a false sense of security.
Naofumi handed his paper to the teacher who went around the room to collect them all, just wanting to get it out of his sight so he can get out of here.
He didn't hesitate for a minute when the bell rang, quickly grabbing his bag and letting out a tired sigh as he exited the classroom. Naofumi felt both mentally and emotionally exhausted from all that.
10 minutes later, he was sitting outside the school building on a bench with Kenji next to him. They had always agreed to meet up here after class and tests to catch their breath. Though that was mostly Naofumi just wanting to get out of the building and spend some time with his friend.
" So...how did it go for you?" Kenji asked as he took a sip of his water.
" I totally bombed that test." Naofumi said with a sigh as he hung his head in shame. He didn't know how he was ever going to explain how he failed math for the thousandth time to his parents.
" Oh come on, it can't be that bad." Kenji tried to cheer him up, but it was pointless.
" I could barely answer a quarter of the questions there. The rest of it, I just made up on the spot out of panic." Naofumi responded dryly.
" Okay, yeah that is kinda bad." Kenji admitted, gently patting Naofumi on the shoulder." But hey, as long as you didn't get the lowest grade in the class. You should be alright!"
Naofumi knew that Kenji was trying to be comforting, but honestly that just made him feel worse. Hoping that he wasn't the absolute bottom of the barrel of the class, where his grades could only look somewhat better if they were compared to somebody else who did worse. What's worse is that college applications were going to be starting in a couple more months after they do their final tests for their senior year, and Naofumi knew that any respectable college his parents would want him to go to expect much better grades than a few barely passed subjects. The only choice for him would be to either go to a private or public college. The former would mean his parents pay a stupid amount of money for him to go to, while the other would be far too embarrassing for his parents.
" College applications are going to be starting soon...god, I don't know what I'm going to do for a major." Naofumi bemoaned to his friend, even if he didn't take into account his piss-poor grades making his choice of colleges and universities limited. Naofumi himself had no idea what he wanted to do for a degree, much less a career that he'll likely be doing for the rest of his life. He didn't really have any particular interests or hobbies that he was especially drawn to, besides maybe gaming. Though he doubts picking a game development major would go over well with mom and dad, and Naofumi was smart enough to know that designing games was nothing like playing them.
Maybe I could become a gaming steamer...maybe I'll get lucky and rack in a million subscribers in my first year, surprise everybody by how a big success I'll be.
Naofumi thought to himself jokingly, knowing how poor his chances of being successful on a website like that are, as if a nobody like him would ever get that lucky and strike gold. And he could already imagine how his family would react, either with laughter or disappointment when it inevitably fails. Probably both.
" Well, we still got a couple more months to figure it out. Don't stress about it too much man, you'll be fine." Kenji said as he gently patted Naofumi on the back.
" Says the guy who's got a basketball scholarship lined up." Naofumi said with an eyeroll. Kenji was a lot more physically active than Naofumi ever was in school, he was on the school basketball team and had already competed in numerous other competitions and brought home the gold and silver. Naofumi had even went to a couple and Kenji was definitely pretty skilled on the court to the point that it netted him a basketball scholarship. He might even be able to go pro one day, if he kept it up.
Kenji didn't look offended at Naofumi's eyeroll, but a rather thoughtful look cross his face." I mean, yeah I got basketball but...I'm not sure I want to do it my whole career, you know what I mean?" Kenji mused." I like the game, don't get me wrong and I wouldn't mind playing professionally but who knows what might happen in 5, 10 or hell even 1 year from now? Interests might change, circumstances, yada, yada. You can't live life stressing about the future Naofumi, that's my advice."
Naofumi let out a breath as he tried to focus on the positives that Kenji just said and after thinking about it for a moment...he was right.
He's still young, he's still got his whole life ahead of him. Anything can happen and there's no point worrying about the 'what-ifs' yet.
" Thanks Kenji."
" Anytime Naofumi." Kenji smiled back.
" So you failed...again." Dad's voice was flat and stern. He had never been the kind of man who shouted a lot, but he had the kind voice that immediately let you know his displeasure. And Naofumi had heard it enough times to know that dad was disappointed with him. His mother was sitting across from him, looking over his results with very clear irritation and disappointment etched on her face.
It all just made Naofumi feel even more small and insignificant than he already was.
He had just gotten back his results for the mid-terms and it was just as bad as he had expected it to be. He got average grades in his usual 'good' subjects, but everything else was a complete flunk. Civics, foreign language and science were all complete fails, he can't even say he got near pass on those subjects. While math was the absolute worst of them all with a near zero marks. Naofumi had hoped that he had gotten at least below average with his worst subject...but now he realizes how stupid that hope really was.
And of course, with his grades came his parents usual talk afterwards that he always dreaded.
" Gods, look at these grades Naofumi, how do you expect to get into a good university at this rate? No respectable university will let you in with failures like these." Dad pushed the report card in front of Naofumi, practically rubbing salt in the wound of his failure." Even the subjects you passed will barely get you a credit for them."
" Yes, I know..." Naofumi nodded. Of course, he knew how terrible his grades were and how they drastically lowered his chance of getting into a good school.
" You say you know, but you don't do anything about it. You sit in your room playing those pointless games all day but you can't dedicate the same amount of time studying a few hours?" Mom chimed in a disappointed tone and it made Naofumi flinch in response. Mom pointed out to Takeru sitting on the couch nearby." Why can't you be more like your brother? He's much younger than you and he's at the top of his class."
Takeru's head kicked up at hearing his name called from the living room, he could see that his younger brother was just sitting in front of the TV, not really paying attention to whatever channel was playing and more just trying to ignore the scolding Naofumi was getting in the dining room. Naofumi didn't blame him, he wouldn't want to get involved either if he was in his place.
It wasn't the first time he had heard his mother compare him to Takeru and he was certain it wouldn't be the last. But it still hurt Naofumi being compared to his younger brother who was closer to the academic prodigy that they were hoping for. Takeru was a top student in all of his classes and was certainly going to get a scholarship when he goes on to university. It was humiliating for Naofumi to be constantly be compared to him.
" Are you even listening to us Naofumi?" Mom's voice snapped him out of his internal thoughts as he raised his head a little. " What do we need to do to get through to you? Have we not paid for tutors, tuition, given you all the tools you need to succeed and you can't even do this?"
" I-Its really hard, I can't understand the material..." Naofumi tried to find an excuse for his failure, probably one of many he has used over the years.
" Well, the real world is even harder. You don't see either of us complaining." Mom bit back and that was just another stab at Naofumi's heart.
" You're going to university soon Naofumi, you can't keep playing around like this. You need to do well on your finals and the university entrance exam. Or else you're just going to end up at a dead-end up job picking trash off the street, you think you can do that?" Dad asked rhetorically to which Naofumi responded with a simple head-shake." Do you understand us Naofumi?"
Naofumi wanted to say something. A small part of him wanted to say what he was really thinking, that it had nothing to do with the tutors, tuition or whatever. He just didn't have the aptitude for it and it was unfair for them to compare him to Takeru who was practically a prodigy. But he couldn't muster up the courage to say any of that, a fear that always held him at bay from ever speaking his mind about what he was really thinking.
So instead he defaulted to his normal response: Nodding and 'yes's
" Yes, I understand dad." Naofumi nodded.
He can't say that he had ever gotten numb to these kind of talks, he just learned to keep his mouth shut and just take it.
The months pass by quicker than Naofumi ever noticed they did. Finals came and went, with Naofumi pushing himself to get at least a pass in all subjects. His parents weren't thrilled by his results but they weren't harping about it, so that was something to be happy about. Graduation was a strange day, it was the last day Naofumi would ever step foot in his old school. He had never quite hated or liked the place, but he did feel a strange nostalgia leaving for the last time. Maybe this was how it felt on the last day of a lot of slice of life school anime's.
But with graduation came university applications and something else Naofumi was not prepared for.
" You're leaving." Naofumi said, stating more of a fact than asking a question to Kenji.
"...Yeah." Kenji nodded, not his usual upbeat self. The two friends were sitting on a park bench that were close enough to both of their houses, that it wasn't too much trouble to meet up. It was a sunny day in the park with kids running around playing, which was ironic considering the almost gloomy tone between the two of them.
Kenji had finally decided on which university he was going to for the next few years, he had his pick of the litter with his scholarship and he chose a popular university in Chugoku that had a renowned basketball team there.
" When...when are you going?" Naofumi asked his friend.
" Next week, I gotta get there early before the semester starts and get acquainted with the rest of the team." Kenji said as he forced himself to smile." My parents are pretty proud of me and are encouraging me to go...but I'm having second thoughts.."
Naofumi turned to his friend in shock at what he was hearing, was Kenji seriously considering not taking this huge opportunity? His parents were proud of him, he had a scholarship and he was thinking of turning it down? It was unimaginable to Naofumi.
" Don't get me wrong Chugoku sounds like a great place, but I'm not sure if its for me-"
" You should go." Naofumi said without fully thinking about it. Kenji looked at him in surprise and Naofumi knew it was too late to back out now, so he just kept talking." I mean, its a huge opportunity and you may not get another shot at this again. You should go if you really want to do it."
Naofumi told himself that day that he was just looking out for his buddy, making sure he wasn't passing up a huge opportunity in his life or some other noble intention. And maybe to some extent that was true. But another part of Naofumi realized that he was probably projecting onto Kenji, about not missing up an opportunity to make his parents proud. To do what Naofumi was never able to.
Kenji seemed to think about what Naofumi said for a moment before nodding." You know what? You're right man, I can't let this opportunity pass me by. Though I will miss this place..." Kenji said as he gazed around the park, before putting his arm around Naofumi. "But don't worry, I'll be sure to keep in touch with you man!"
Naofumi tried to take comfort in those words, but it didn't make him feel any better as the day of Kenji's move came and went by.
True to his word after he moved to Chugoku, Kenji did keep in touch with Naofumi whenever he could over messages he sent to his phone. Naofumi was glad that his friend still kept in touch even though now he clearly had much more important things to worry about than his old high school deadbeat friend.
Though with each message and update he got from Kenji about his life in Chugoku, Naofumi couldn't help but feel a sense of inferiority and mild jealousy towards his far away friend. Kenji had made plenty of new friends on the basketball team, and around campus. It wasn't that surprising considering how much of an extrovert Kenji was compared to him, but his old friend had even managed to get himself a girlfriend by the name of Emi. He had even sent Naofumi a couple of pictures featuring his new team and girlfriend.
Naofumi wanted to say that he was happy for his friend for the success he had managed to gain for himself and deep down, he was happy. But it felt bitter and made him that much more self-aware about his place in life.
Takeru and Kenji were the talented and hard-working ones, while Naofumi was just the lazy otaku sibling/friend who didn't even know what he wanted to do with his life yet. He doesn't even feel like the main character in his own life, he would be closer to a background or supporting character. The guy who's there just to fill up the cast and not really do anything especially important besides stand around.
Maybe that was the difference between him and guys like Kenji or Takeru. They were able to persevere and keep on moving, whereas he would just flop around and slowly give up because of how hard everything was. Naofumi wasn't delusional enough to think he could ever get to their level, in terms of anime archetypes, Takeru would be the prodigious student while Kenji is the go-lucky hardworking guy. Naofumi was just a nobody who was below the respect of his own parents, who are pretty much hedging their bets on his younger brother making their family proud and upholding their name.
Maybe if Naofumi put in more effort to better himself than he could say that he was on equal footing with his younger brother and friend. Maybe if Naofumi had more courage, he could stand-up to his parents and tell them how he feels about his dreams and aspirations in life. Maybe if Naofumi had tried harder than things could be different and he could finally make his parents proud and be somebody.
Or maybe...it was just better this way.
Naofumi knew for years now that he was not destined for greatness. That spot was reserved for people like Takeru and Kenji who were capable of putting in the work and determination to change things. Naofumi was a lazy otaku who just wanted to do the bare minimum and stay in his little comfort zone in Tokyo, there was nothing wrong with that.
Maybe that was just how the world was.
The months pass by like a blur for Naofumi, it was honestly nice to no longer have to wake up every single morning to go to school. Which gave him a lot more time for gaming so that was a good time, he certainly didn't miss dealing and worrying about mock tests and quizzes in school. But within his few months of graduating into adulthood, came college applications and the time had come for Naofumi to make his choice for a college and a career. Kenji had encouraged him through his messages to shoot for the stars and aim big. So Naofumi set out to try and prove his parents wrong by making it into Tokyo University, a prestigious place that he knew that his parents Takeru to go to.
He should have known better than to try, when a few months later he got a notice that told him that he didn't make it into TokyoU. This wasn't some crappy underdog story where the talentless character proves that he is capable of preserving through hard work. No, this is reality where the talentless individual is constantly outshined by his peers and siblings, those actually gifted to make change to the world.
His parents surprisingly didn't ride him about his failure like usual when they got the news that their eldest son had failed again. Perhaps they had reached the same level of zen as he did to his continued failures. They already had what they wanted in the form of Takeru: A smart and intelligent son who would make them proud and not be a colossal embarrassment for the family.
They had stopped caring. Which is why he didn't particularly care either when he later applied and got into a third rate university that had easy enough entrance exams and chose an equally unremarkable business management course. That was the absolute bare minimum he should need to get a decent enough job.
If fate had already decided he was doomed to live an average, unnotable life than who was he to fight against it? Might as well just make the work load easier on himself.
Kenji kept trying to encourage Naofumi from far away to keep pushing, but he had started to find it increasingly annoying and a little resentful to his old friend. How can he keep pushing and dreaming when everything he does fails? Or even when he does succeed in some aspect, he's constantly overshadowed by people more talented than him? How can Kenji ask him to stay optimistic when he's the one who got the scholarship, girlfriend and friends that Naofumi wished he had.
Naofumi had slowly stopped responding to Kenji's messages, it hurt what little remained of his pride to listen to Kenji's frequent updates on how he was doing much better than his deadbeat high school friend. He felt envy at his friend for finding success where Naofumi could never find any, be it in physicality, academics or even getting friends or a girlfriend for that matter. He knew it was no fault of Kenji, but he couldn't change the way he felt.
He wonders if he is betraying his friend by slowly moving away from responding to his messages. Some part of him tried to convince himself that this was only natural with how busy Kenji and himself had started to become with their individual lives, but he knew that was just a cheap excuse. His pride was just hurt by hearing how successful his friend was compared to him and he was too much of a coward to talk it out with Kenji like a normal person to tell him to scale it back, so distancing felt like the only option.
Kenji will be fine without his old friend dragging him down. He has his own friends and girl to look after now, Naofumi is just deadweight.
In the midst of his self-pitying and distancing from one of the few people who genuinely believed in him, Naofumi had neglected the changes that had started to happen to the family dynamic right under his nose.
According to his parents, Takeru had started to fall into the wrong crowd. His younger brother had supposedly started skipping a bit in school and his grades starting dropping below his usual grade average. The expensive tutors that his parents had hired to ensure that his younger brother succeeded where Naofumi failed had all complained that Takeru didn't really listen to them during their sessions.
Honestly, Naofumi thought that his parents were overreacting but they seemed to think that he was the cause for Takeru's sudden lapse into bad habits. Their logic apparently was that Naofumi had been a bad example to Takeru and now his younger brother was following in his footsteps. Admittedly, Naofumi hadn't really been setting the best example for his younger brother and didn't think he was around enough for Takeru to emulate, but his parents seemed to think otherwise.
His parents demanded that Naofumi fix his mistake or they would kick him out of the house and cut him off. An otaku's worst nightmare come to life.
Partly, Naofumi wondered if blaming him for Takeru's rebellious phase was just a thinly veiled excuse for his parents to finally get rid of the waste of space that was their elder son. Just because he had been doing the bare minimum in college and they had fully invested in their younger son succeeding, that didn't mean they would tolerate an embarrassment like him in their house. He was just a waste taking up space and food.
So with as much enthusiasm as the threat of being kicked out of his home could bring him, Naofumi went up to his brother's room to have a chat. He hadn't really thought about what he was going to say to his younger brother, he wouldn't really say that they were distant but it was inaccurate to say they were close either. Naofumi decided to just speak his heart out and go from there.
To his surprise, his conversation with Takeru didn't go like he thought he would. There was no shouting, slamming door in his face or anything like that. Takeru was actually in the middle of studying when Naofumi came to talk to him.
Naofumi tried to do his whole 'big brother' talk, but he was honestly making it up as he asked how Takeru was doing in school and the usual stuff. He got the distinct impression that Takeru really wasn't listening to what he was saying as he studied. He had plenty of experience mastering his 'I'm totally listening to you but not really' face over the years from enduring his parents lectures and he could see it from a mile away on Takeru.
"-And I just want you to know that me, mom and dad here for you if you need it, if you start to slip up on your grades or something else..."
Takeru's head kicked up at that, seeming to have caught on to something. " My grades? What are you-Oh my god, did mom and dad put you up to this?" Takeru easily called him out, making him flinch in response.
"...Maybe? They're just worried about you and-"
" If their idea of being worried is being controlling dicks than yeah, you got that right." Takeru said derisively of their parents, as he started to explain the full story. The 'wrong crowd' he had fallen in with, had apparently just been a club of guys and girls who were into anime at his school. Not exactly the delinquent street punks that committed petty crime that Naofumi had imagined. The reason for his skipping was because he wanted to start taking it easy into high school.
It would seem that his original assumption was right: His parents were just pissy that their 'perfect prodigy' wasn't dancing to all their tunes and wanted to take it somewhat easy now that he was in high school. His grades were still in the B to A range, much better than Naofumi ever brought home. His parents really were overreacting if they thought this was Takeru slipping.
" God, is this the whole reason why you came to give me the 'big brother' talk, they put you up to this? You gotta be kidding me, " Takeru said and he could only nod in confirmation, to which he sighed." What did they hold you over to get you to do this?"
" They...might have threatened to kick me out."
" Wait, really?"
" Yeah, they said I was being a bad example that made you like this and it was either fixing it or getting kicked out." Naofumi confessed.
" Damn..."
Takeru had the unspoken 'protection' of being the prodigal son, the one that was destined to make his parents proud. Which meant that gave him a lot more leeway to be rebellious against his parents, since they couldn't afford to cut him off as he was their 'last hope'. While Naofumi sadly didn't share that protection, sure he didn't have to deal with the expectations that his parents stacked onto his younger brother, but that also meant that they had no reason to keep him around.
The two brothers were silent for a moment, both just enjoying the quiet moment before Takeru spoke up.
" Our parents are real controlling assholes, aren't they?"
It was so out of left-field that it made Naofumi genuinely chuckle at it, as the two brothers started talking again.
" Yeah, they are."
The two of them bonded over how annoying and controlling their parents could be. Takeru had come clean over how he really felt having their parents 'favor' and in that he hated it. It seemed being the prodigal son wasn't all it cracked up to be, with him having to constantly meet his parents expectations and be the 'academic prodigy' they were hoping for. While Naofumi lamented the fact that his parents had more or less given up on him and seen him as a failure no matter how hard he tried. He brought up how they always made him feel insecure about himself and his place in the world.
The two talked about their parents, usually in the form of insults and jabs at them, it was a cathartic experience and probably one of the most honest talks Naofumi had ever had in his life.
When he ended it with suggesting to Takeru to try and have a healthy work-life balance, his younger brother was enthusiastic at the idea. Not like he could talk since he himself didn't exactly have a balanced work-life but still it was something Takeru could try.
It seemed to have worked as several months later, Takeru was back on track being the straight-A student that he was. Though he detected that there was still some animosity between Takeru and his parents, but it wasn't serious for now. Naofumi had taught him a few tricks about how to slack but still find time to study at every opportune time and hang out with his new friends.
Naofumi was allowed to keep living at home, provided that he kept up his studies. All seemed right with the world.
Which was why Naofumi hadn't expected much when he went to the library one day to check out some books on business management. His lecturer had advised buying the ones from the college's bookstore but those were clearly overpriced and not worth the money.
As he perused the collection of business management books, one of them on the shelf caught his eye and it seemed out of place with the title it had.
" The Weapons of the Four Saints?"
It was times like this where Naofumi didn't really feel like a hero, despite the fact that he had been summoned to a literal isekai world and chosen as one of the Legendary Heroes to defend it from catastrophe. The first time was when he found out that he was the only hero that was stuck with the weapon that didn't have any attack power. The second was when he was falsely accused of rape and just barely got away with an innocent verdict thanks to Mein. The third was when he learned that the country that summoned him hated his guts by extension of another country that supposedly worshipped him as a god.
It seemed like even in an isekai world, he's still the black sheep of the group. The one who's constantly overshadowed by the much more talented people. Pathetic.
The somber atmosphere of Silver Keep just helped remind him of that, as it didn't dissipate in the slightest as the night went on. They had managed beat back the bandits at Weiss's mining camp, but it was still a major loss when the bandits apparently killed one of the few lords in this country that was actually sympathetic to demi-humans and beastmen. Naofumi saved as many people as he could today, yet he still feels like a failure.
It was a solemn reminder than when he failed or made a mistake, people suffered for it. That it wasn't a game where you could just restart or reload when you screwed up. Like when he gave in too easily and let Raphtalia come with them to the Second Wave which resulted in her being crippled with one less arm.
He wouldn't even really call himself the 'leader' of his own party. Honestly, Mein and Ake do a hell of a lot more to keep the group together than he does. Ake having a mind for logistics, maps and making sure that they were always well-supplied in the carriage. While Mein clearly had the training, skill, strategic thinking and the power needed to decimate any threat that came their way, it was why she was the main damage dealer of the group. The Mark she got from the Outsider just enhanced her already present skills.
He was grateful to have them around, god knows he doesn't know what he would have done without them around to help balance out the rest of the party and keep things managed. But like Kenji, it just served as another reminder of just how outclassed he feels compared to them. He was the tank of the party and he liked to think that he was starting to get better at it, but beyond that...he wasn't sure how to feel.
" Naofumi...Naofumi!" His name being called followed by snapping fingers jolted him out of his thoughts. He raised his head to see Itsuki looking at him with a somewhat curious look." You okay man? Did you hear what I said? "
" S-Sorry, lost in thought. What did you say just now?" Naofumi apologized and asked his fellow hero to reiterate what he had just said.
Itsuki had called Naofumi up to his room to discuss some new info he had apparently come across while he was out with Slayer and Titan Storm. It was a bit surprising to Naofumi that Itsuki was balancing searching for info on Mein while hunting bandits with his party, which was quite impressive. The Shield Hero had suspected that there was more to Itsuki's life in his past life than he was letting on, but he didn't press on it.
" Well, I said that I did a bit of digging on Mein's background like you asked and I came across some pretty interesting info." Itsuki said and that made Naofumi sit up straight a bit more. Any new information on Mein was something he had to hear.
" Okay, so first I did a bit of digging on her background as an adventurer at the guild. Took a fair of bit of convincing and me putting the charm on the receptionist, but I was able to get a look at her records as an adventurer." Itsuki explained, seeming to have memorized whatever he found there. Naofumi recalled back during his first few days with Mein, after the trial when she took him to the capital's adventurers guild to confirm her identity. But he hadn't investigated much further beyond that.
" And? What did you find?"
" Clean records, reports on a couple of quests, listed promotion interviews...all the bells and whistles. Mein's record is clean." Itsuki said with a suspicious tone in his voice." Way too clean. Something doesn't feel right."
Naofumi tried to follow Itsuki's line of thinking and he got an idea for what he was implying." What, you think the records are fake?"
Itsuki shook his head." No, they definitely seem real enough, the receptionist confirmed it herself. But I thought something was hiding beneath the surface, so I dug into her family name. Did you know Mein was from some fallen noble house by the name of House Sophie?"
Naofumi nodded as Itsuki repeated some of the same information Mein already told him. " Yeah, Mein already told me that she was from the cadet branch of this fallen noble house that tore itself apart due to internal conflict. Her mother was apparently second-in-line and didn't really care much for the noble life, so she became a travelling herbalist who later met her father who was a Faubley Ranger."
" That matches up with what she told me during our incursion into Rabier City...though we don't have any actual confirmation that she's telling the truth besides her word. She could be bullshitting you for all we know and just pretended like she was a member of that House Sophie." Itsuki surmised.
Naofumi couldn't help but feel a mixture of uncertainty and fear at that possibility. Based on what Mein told him earlier, it genuinely doesn't sound like she was lying...than again, she did hide her true intentions when they first met and like Itsuki said, he has no way to properly confirm it.
" Which is why its a good thing that I figured out where the current remains of House Sophie are in Melromarc." Itsuki's added with a small smirk." I heard their remnants lie in Whiterun county, not too far from here."
" W-Wait, really?" Naofumi asked, surprised that Mein's family was so close to them.
" Yup, you can ask Mein to go drop them a visit when this is all over to confirm it." Itsuki said with a smirk.
" Itsuki this is great work, thank you." Naofumi said gratefully to his fellow hero.
" I'm amazing, sometimes I impress myself." Itsuki responded proudly, though Naofumi wasn't really listening.
Itsuki had found a solid lead on Mein's past and it couldn't be more solid than members of Mein's own family that she seemed keen on not talking about in great detail.
He didn't want to say that he distrusted Mein, she was his first companion and had been his biggest help so far on his journey but...he couldn't deny that he still had his own suspicions about her past, who she was, and what had made her this way. And as crazy as it probably sounds, he was intrigued by it and wanted to learn more. It was like unraveling a mystery and he wanted to figure out who she was.
Maybe at long last he can finally get a clear picture on who Mein Sophie is.
So...I feel like we need to have a talk about Naofumi since it has been literally over 2 years since this story started and 60+ chapters in that we're finally getting into his backstory.
Okay, so full disclosure to everybody here but Naofumi's backstory was going to be entirely different than what was shown here similar to Itsuki. Originally my plan was that Naofumi was kicked out of his parents house and could only return on the condition that he got into a university of some kind to avoid being a complete embarrassment to them. There was going to be a whole series of flashbacks where its shown what Naofumi had to do to survive on his own(Including working in multiple restaurants which is where he got his cooking abilities) and that he cheated during the entrance exam and framed some random guy for it.
This was meant to give him some common ground with Malty, where they both know how it feels like to be abandoned by those you thought closest to you and doing some bad stuff to get by. But because I'm an incompetent moron and despite having multiple chapters with Naofumi's POV that did not hint at this tragic backstory at all, it was canned in the end when this chapter was written.
Oh well, you win some, you lose some.
:P
Though looking at the chapter now, I do think this change kinda works better since the whole point of Naofumi's character in this story is that he's someone who's constantly surrounded by people who are either more talented or skilled than him which just feeds into his insecurities of inadequacy. This is best shown with Kenji and Takeru in his flashbacks.
And yes, I did change the event where Naofumi supposedly helped his brother overcome a problem by changing it to that there never really was a problem and Naofumi ended up overselling it to Malty a bit. This was done mostly because I wanted to change at least one thing about his backstory and because I didn't just want Naofumi's backstory here to be a complete reskin of canon/Ambition.
Hope you all enjoy it nonetheless.
With that said, I will see you all in the next one.
Angel Out.