Demons

Words: 1158

Summary: She coudn't ignore something that is painted on her skin. They were ugly, they were deep. They were the constant reminder of a life full of regrets.

TW: Themes of depression

Her back an untold story. Every scar a painful memory. All together weave the tapestry of a past life. A life Vi was desperately trying to forget.

But she couldn't. Because every time she looked at herself in the mirror, the first thing she noticed was those deep marks on her body. A few were covered with tattoos. But the rest were exposed for her to see. She tried desperately to ignore them, to pretend like they did not exist. But you can't ignore something that is painted on your skin. They were ugly, they were deep. They were the constant reminder of a life full of regrets.

Regrets that kept up with her up to this day.

She believed that she would be redeemed when she joined the Enforcers. That all of her past mistakes could be forgiven and forgotten. That she could atone for her mistakes. That her inner demons would finally leave her to live in peace. But the scars remained. It's where her demons hide, after all.

She could fight them no more. As long as those scars remained on her skin, she wouldn't forget. She couldn't forget. Instead of trying to heal them, she decided to hide them. At least that way no one else would be hurt too. And so, she moved on with her life, trying to ignore their existence.

This life gained an entire new meaning when she became a massive part of it. Vi couldn't tell at the beginning of their partnership that Caitlyn could play such a vital role in her miserable reality. She was like the moon into the darkness. Her darkness. And the fire the sheriff sparkled inside her was impossible to extinguish.

But did Vi really want this fire to die out? Certainly not. And to achieve that, Caitlyn wouldn't know a thing about her scars and her past life.

But destiny never aligns with our wishes.

One terrible night when her demons triumphed again, her dreams were filled with the horrific events of the past. She woke up panting, with an unbearable burden on her chest, with a pain that makes breathing a struggle. She looked around furiously but there was no obvious threat. It was only Caitlyn laying next to her, and thankfully, she had no clue of what's going on. Vi stared at her in the darkness. How can a being look so gorgeous even while sleeping? And how could a monster like her lay next to her every single night? Sighing, she slipped out of the bed and went straight to the bathroom where she could splash some water on her face. As she did, she looked at her reflection and noticed the black bags that had taken residence under her eyes. Another restless week was on the way, she noted, shaking her head. It happened from time to time, when depression hit her harder than usual.

It was certain that she wouldn't get any more sleep despite the fact that it was still very early - maybe around four in the morning - and decided against returning to bed. She didn't want to be a burden to Cait just because her inner demons wanted to have a party. No, she would have some fresh water and stay on the living room's couch. Sounded like a plan. After wiping her hands on a small white towel, she left the bathroom and switched off the lights before heading towards the kitchen.

She grabbed a glass from the cupboard and filled it with cold water from the fridge before bringing it to her lips. It helped release some of her stress. She drank all of it and rested her back on the counter, still holding a tight grip around the glass. Her eyes fixed onto the window; the sun hadn't risen yet and only the city lights illuminated the dark roads. Dark, just like her soul. Dangerous too.

She didn't deserve any of this. This life, this peace, this happiness isn't for her. Caitlyn deserved better. Deserved someone who isn't haunted by her terrible past, filled with blood, dust and death...

She couldn't even control it at this point. The images flashed before her very own eyes uncontrollably; blood, twisted corpses by the chemicals, screams, pain.. She tightened the grip so much around the glass that it eventually shuttered into her palm and she collapsed. She couldn't take it anymore. She crushed to the wooden floor and curled up next to the broken pieces of the glass, alongside with the broken pieces of her soul. Her shirt had been pulled up and her back was exposed to the cold. She shivered slightly.

"Vi? Oh my God, what happened?"

Her voice was filled with concern as Caitlyn knelt down next to her. Her eyes traveled up her back and she saw. She saw all of Vi's terrible past and her eyes grew wide. Vi tried to hide.

"Don't look. Please," she begged and Caitlyn instantly removed her eyes. She focused on helping Vi up instead and examined her injured palm.

"I'm going to get the aid kit," she said quietly after a while. She tried to stand up but Vi's firm grip pulled her down instantly. The sheriff met the tempest of Vi's eyes and instantly wrapped her arms around her broken partner. She would help her up, she had to. She wouldn't abandon her.

~•~•~•~•~

Later on, Vi sat on the bed, her palm patched but her back still exposed. She felt tremendously embarrassed. Not because Caitlyn hadn't seen said scars before - in fact, she had several times - but that was the first time she examined them properly. She didn't pry, she didn't try to approach such a sensitive matter. But now she had to. She didn't ask anything, though. The only thing she did was run her fingers over the marks then brushed her lips over them. Every single one of them. Vi felt a violent shiver down her spine. When she was done, Caitlyn faced Vi and the sheriff's eyes for once betrayed her emotions fully.

"I love you," she whispered in the darkness before kissing Vi's lips. The enforcer inhaled deeply. "I love every single part of you. Please, don't hide from me"

Vi choked on her breath as feelings caught up with her. Caitlyn didn't deserve this, she didn't need to deal with that too. She had a city to protect. There's no time for a broken soul like Vi's.

"I..."

"Shh..." Caitlyn shushed her, placing a finger on her lips. "I'm here. You don't have to tell me anything. Just let me help you"

Vi nodded and she didn't say anything. She was too self-conscious about those scars but she let Cait kiss them every night, warming her inside storm. The snow would slowly melt if Vi let the sun shine. She was hesitant at first but eventually the sun prevailed.

And demons do not like light so they would probably find another dark corner to haunt.