– Present –

– Dargonus –

No one, not even Abelard, knew what Idira and the Rogue Trader talked about that day.

What everyone noticed, though, was that Idira was often seen lurking by her study, coming in an out - always carrying hot tea and pastries with her. A certain glow had begun to form around Idira - the one you had when you went to spend time not only with your boss, but also with a friend, and you felt important to someone's eyes.

Idira wasn't the only troubled girl in the band anymore. What's best, the Rogue Trader herself was the new troubled girl. So no one would say anything against her and everyone looked at Idira with a hint of envy and jealousy - what did the unsanctioned diviner had over them ?

However, even Idira didn't manage to make Elena talk about the visions she had while in the oneiro-pod. The experiment continued, for hours at a day. Elena was more and more absent and distant. Abelard substituted for her in meetings and decision-making.

To all members of her retinue, Elena's behavior was new and incomprehensible. She would not receive them, not even Heinrix. Only Idira was allowed into her study. Whenever they spotted her, walking in the orangerie at night, she was looking like a ghost. She didn't speak much. Everyone worried.

Cassia sent flowers and letters, hoping for the Rogue Trader to make some time in her schedule for receiving her and Evayne.

Jae bribed her way into the Rogue Trader's bedroom, only to be hushed away by Idira. The two women fell out in dispute after that, Jae nearly scratching through the walls to try to get to Elena. No one put as much effort as her to get through to her - with no avail. Elena barely noticed.

Still, Jae never relented in her attempts to reach out to the Rogue Trader. Worried, she reported her discoveries as Mistress of Whispers to Abelard.

Argenta prayed, wondering if she'd make the right choice by staying at Elena's side. However, her faith carried her through. She was reminded that Elena was the Emperor's Chosen, and thus her actions must be guided by His sight. She had to wait, see, and have faith.

Yrliet was getting more and more discreet. In the secret of the night, she had managed to slip through Elena's wardens again, and into her office, unseen even by the diviner that guarded the Rogue Trader. However, she had not found Elena in there and had not comprehended the technology that guarded her secret study. The xenos only inferred from it all that Elena had secrets. The feeble sense of trust she felt towards Elena started to grow thinner and thinner, as Yrliet's doubts assailed her and clouded her soul…and ultimately her judgment.

How ironic that, by trying to outrun fate and avoid it, Elena was just creating the conditions of her demise all the way. Had the Rogue Trader kept her head in the present, she may have noticed Yrliet's distress. The Aeldari would have spoken to her about her kind, about Achilleas, about the betrayal blooming in the very center of her capital. But Elena's lack of attention set things in motion. Even when everything she did, she did to try to avoid it. This is what happens to smart-ass diviners.

Pasqal had been absent himself for a while. The fact that Elena was busy elsewhere was a relief to him : no one asked him questions anymore about what he was doing on the ship exactly. Somewhere in the slumber of the flagship, Pasqal communicated with something…a machine spirit far greater than most, awakening from a long slumber. Pasqal knew Elena would be needed at some point - but for now, he was happy to keep this his little secret.

Then, there was Heinrix. What would a spy of the Golden Throne do in such a situation ? He had kissed Elena, he had danced with her, he had hoped with her. Now she was shutting her doors closed, not responding to him. At first, he believed that she had finally decided to end things with him. In that, she would have shown a spark of awareness and intelligence he could only agree with, no matter how it hurt him.

But after a while, his delusion of love started giving way to more critical thinking. What if the Rogue Trader was hiding something ? Why was Idira the only one to see her ? What was happening inside this study ? Why did none of his spies have any clues what was going on ? His bugs had been removed. He tried to get it out from Abelard - but intimidating the old man was a feat unreachable even to an inquisitorial agent.

Jae had tried to enter through bribes and manipulation. She had not succeeded.

Well, Heinrix wasn't just going to take it and wait around helplessly.

– Heinrix's point of view –

When with the Rogue Trader, Heinrix had respected the limits of his authority. Or, more exactly, he had pretended there were limits to his authority.

In truth, there was only one limit : the stubborn mind of Elena von Valancius. That, sadly, he held very little power over.

All the rest fell beyond his reach.

He met a simmering and furious Jae on his way, who had tried another breakthrough - only to be stopped by a smug Idira on her way.

" The ashmag ! " mumbled Jae.

Heinrix made a mental note of the loyalty of the smuggler. For a pirate and a thief, Jae certainly had a fierceness inside her when it came to protecting the woman who'd given her a Mercuta Tabulae.

He went to the door of Elena's study. It was guarded by a few wardens. They looked at him with wariness and defiance.

Heinrix glared at them, his face impassive, his lips stretched in a thin line.

" I'll put it bluntly for you", he said. " Who amongst you wants to be the one to say "no" to an agent of the Golden Throne ?"

The wardens looked at each other and, cautiously, came to the conclusion that they weren't paid enough to oppose any sort of resistance to an Interrogator. Who knew what would become of them and their families should they irritate the Inquisition.

Jae stopped, looking at the scene with wide eyes filled with jealousy. " That's cheating ! " she shouted from the other side of the hall.

Heinrix could not help his lips twitching slightly at the side in a smug grin.

" On the contrary, Mistress Heydari", he replied without turning back, " I am merely playing with a full deck."

" Let me come with you ! Heinrix -"

He crossed the door and closed it purposefully over Jae's nose as she leapt behind him, trying to set her foot inside.

" I think not", he whispered.

Whatever was going on with Elena, he wanted to see for himself. He wanted to hold her, to be with her, to make sure she was all right. He had to check on her, to learn her secrets, to assess the dangers she could represent.

For all of that, he certainly didn't want an overly excited Mistress Heydari with him.

Idira was inside, sitting in an armchair in the reception area. Her small flocks of brown hair fell over her forehead, hiding the scars around the neural implant that was overloaded by the daemon she had manifested.

" Tsss, tss, iceman", she said with a hint of apprehension, " now you know that's not fair ."

Heinrix stopped, considering the unsanctionned psyker standing in front of him.

For some reason, Idira had a blanket comfortably thrown around her shoulders, as if she'd been cold. She was hugging a mug of tea in her hands. Sat in a velvety chair, she looked like she just woken up from a nap. No Elena in sight.

Heinrix settled for a simple :

" Where is she ?"

Idira raised her eyebrow, looking at him. " Wherever she is, " said Idira bravely, " she doesn't want you there."

That hurt him, deep down. So maybe that was why he didn't react kindly to that. Keeping his composure, he sat down in front of Idira, staring her in the eye.

" Miss Tlass," he started in a slightly annoyed tone. " I fear that our time together may have driven you to think that I was a friend of yours. I'd like to help you stay clear from such dangerous assumptions. I am, Miss Tlass, devoted to the missions entrusted to me by the Golden Throne. If not for the Rogue Trader's protection, I would and I will send you off to a Black Ship, where you belong. Sadly, I do not see the Rogue Trader around, do I ?"

Idira recoiled inside the chair, her fingers shaking.

" So, Miss Tlass, I will begin again and this time I want you to pay attention to what I am saying. Where is Elena ?"

The small woman stared back. He knew he held power over her - he knew he frightened her. He knew he could snatch her away to the Black Ship if he really wanted it. Xavier had extended Idira a kind eye for now - but tolerance towards unsanctionned psykers was a fickle gift, one that could be taken back in the blink of a second if said pysker was deemed too dangerous or uncontrollable. Or simply not malleable enough.

He could tell that all of this flashed inside Idira's twisted mind. She looked like a scared mouse, her shoulders naturally slumping.

So Heinrix was very surprised when Idira looked him dead in the eye and said between clenched teeth :

" You know what, iceman ? Fuck you. You think you scare me ? That's true. But in the end you're just a hound. Fuck you, fuck your chains, fuck your threats. You think you know me, but you don't." A mad glow shone in her brown eyes. She tilted her head, savoring the surprise and shock in Heinrix's expression. " You won't lay a hand over me while Elena is around. She holds your leash now. "

Idira smiled and leant forward. " Also, one thing, iceman. Elena saved my ass. She is my friend. I will never sell her out, even to you. "

Heinrix leant in as well, letting the shock of Idira's reply pass. His crisp features took on a cold shine.

" Miss Tlass, " he began. " You would not believe how many times people have been brave to my face just before their interrogation. I can assure you that being brave does not change a thing in the end."

Idira's eyes twitched nervously. " But it does. For someone like me, it does change things, Heinrix."

That was the first time Idira ever called him by his name. That was also the first time she didn't stutter and talk back to him.

As he was considering what to do with her, he heard the sound of a door being opened. In a second, as if both of them had been jolted, they stood to attention and all traces of their dispute disappeared in a moment.

Elena was here. Both Idira and Heinrix suddenly leant back with an air of obliviousness, trying to pretend they weren't at each other's throats seconds ago.

Elena was wearing a bodyglove that Heinrix tried not to look at too intently. Her hair framed her face lifelessly and in disorderly fashion. That sent an alarm to Heinrix's brain : he had noticed times and times again how Elena cared about her hair and loved to showcase it, because crazy weird psykers on the Black Ship were shaven down like animals. He felt the same way deep down but didn't find the strength to admit it openly. Such pettiness seemed completely out-of-place for an Interrogator.

Heinrix got up, tilting his head in a slight bow. " Elena," he said, using his formal tone to salute her.

His heart skipped a beat as she threw him an absent look. She was drenched in water and she looked tired.

" Heinrix", she replied in the same tone. She glanced at Idira. Only now did Heinrix notice that Idira had been hiding from him a tray of tea and sweets. " Idira, you can go. "

Idira threw a suspicious look at Heinrix, visibly not happy with this decision, but obeyed the Rogue Trader.

" I'll be lurking nearby if you need me, Lord Captain. "

Elena waited for Idira to be out and, swiftly, took the direction of her bathroom.

" You have questions. I need to take a hot shower. "

She brusquely zipped down her bodyglove, throwing the suit over her desk. Heinrix, who'd been following her, blinked in surprise. He could not stop his eyes from wandering over her pale body. In a moment of prudishness - she hadn't called for him for so many days that maybe their relationship was over ? - he looked away, clenching his jaw in annoyance as she seemed to purposefully target him with another set of lingerie thrown his way.

Annoying woman. He ignored what appeared to be a tanga thrown in his arms, picked it up calmly and set it on the armchair.

" Elena, you haven't shown yourself for days. You haven't -" talked to me, he thought, but refused to admit that his feelings were hurt as if he was a teenager and not a grown man " - assisted to any meeting lately. What is going on ?"

" So that's what worries you ? The fact that I'm not presiding meetings ? Good to know where your priorities lay, " she said, opening another door. The scent of rose, juniper berries and lime hit him.

He recognized that tone she used. It was her "stubborn and in a bad mood" tone. It switched something inside him. He was even more headstrong than her.

He followed her into the spa room. It seemed that the von Valancius had a thing for swimming pools and hammams. Elena was already under a hot shower. She had pressed her forehead against the tiles and looked defeated, as if she was recovering from a strange hardship.

" Elena. Tell me the truth. What is going on here ? " he insisted, unrelenting.

She sighed. " You just never stop asking questions, don't you ?"

Heinrix smiled sadly. " That is indeed what I do."

She gestured for him to join her. He hesitated - and then softly proceeded to take out his uniform, auspex, and sword. Because Heinrix was Heinrix, he folded all his clothes in a military manner, taking his time to do so.

He entered into the shower as discreetly as he could. He hesitated to touch her, not sure where they stood. Did she still want him ? She had ignored him for days, leaving him to wonder if Calcazar's irruption had finally driven the nail into the coffin of their relationship. If their last dance had indeed been the last. He tried to look at the ceiling, not at her back, not at her legs.

That's when he saw it - tears, digging furrows over Elena's cheeks.

All thoughts of prudence were gone. His arms extended as if of their own volition, embracing her tall and slender build, pulling her inside his embrace. Elena offered no resistance. Not knowing what he was doing, he very knightley kissed her tear, brushing it away with his lips.

They stayed like this for a while, Heinrix trying to ignore the effect their close proximity had on him.

Tracing her cheek with his thumb, he cast a severe look at her eyes, waiting for the sign of any tear forming.

" Talk to me, dove " he said.

She half-sobbed, half-sniggered. " You called me dove ."

Heinrix felt a pang of annoyance at her and, in truth, at himself. Yes, he had. It was stupid. Mental note : never give a nickname to Elena again. " Don't avoid the question."

" I don't want to tell you what I'm doing."

Which meant he would have to ply it out from her. Heinrix brushed her hair mind-absently. " Why ? It looks important."

" It's better this way. "

He tried to read on her face. Elena had never been very good at social skills. She was often impassive, stern, just as he was. But, contrarily to him, she had never mastered her micro-expressions. To an experienced eye, her furrows, her eyes, her lips were an open book. But today, there was nothing but fatigue over her features. Her voice was soft, but assertive. She was sure of herself.

Multiple thoughts and hypotheses turned inside his mind. " You don't have to do things alone, Elena, " he said after a while.

She remained silent for a while and he believed that no answer would be forthcoming for a while, until she said :

" There are places in my mind where none of you could ever pretend to go. There are things I feel and see that I cannot convey with words and cannot share. It is the way it is. "

She is talking about her divination, he gathered quickly. She had mentioned to him, before her Magnae Accessio, that she was assailed with nightmares and dark visions lately. Considering her state, those must have increased. It was worrisome. Was her will faltering ? Was she at risk of corruption ? - Those were the first thoughts that came to his mind.

Dutiful, he tried to discreetly examine her for clues of corruption. He saw none, but could tell she had noticed his change of expression and had understood the train of his thoughts. Something angry and vexed flickered in her eyes, pulling her out of her well of fatigue. It was easy to translate. She resented him for acting like the Interrogator he was.

He shook his head, unhappy. He was trying to reach out to her, to make a step towards her - but she eluded him. Or, most certainly - she eluded the Inquisition in him. And thus, she discarded him. After a second or two, her look of vexation simmered down.

Her hands grew wandering along the length of his back. She kissed his neck. Demanding. Hungry. Pressing herself against him under the hot shower.

He fantasized himself pushing her against the wall. He would turn her around, pinning her down with his arms and hands. She would open her legs, lascive, asking him to take her. He would feel her warmth as he entered her, hear her sighs and whimpers of pleasure. He could have her right now -

But it wouldn't be right. She was distressed, unlike herself. She wanted him carnally - only to dodge his questions, to find easy comfort from whatever thoughts lurked inside her mind. She would just use him and not tell him a thing. Surely that could not be a solution. He didn't even know where they stood anymore. He couldn't touch her if he wasn't certain she truly desired him - and not the distraction he may represent.

He closed his eyes, feeling the tension rise within him and the tear in his soul grow. He kissed her forehead gently. " No, Elena, no. If you won't tell me what is bothering you, what's the good of it ? "

" Are you blackmailing me ?" she said, visibly confused by his gentle rebuke.

Heinrix felt a pang of shame at her words. Of course he wasn't blackmailing her. He may have done so before, in other missions, with other targets. Never would he even think about doing that to Elena. She was…she was something else. She wasn't just a target.

" Of course not, woman !" He reacted hotly. Cooling down, he desentangled himself from her. " I'm saying I…" What was he saying ? That woman got his thoughts on a bundle. " I don't want to be with you if I cannot be with the whole of you. If you can't tell me what troubles you. If you cannot trust me, then surely it must mean I'm not good enough for you. "

The foolishness of this confession overwhelmed him. What was going on inside his head ? Where has all his training gone ? He kind of wished he could bang his forehead against the tiles. Or that a daemon would emerge from the Empyrean this instant to distract him from his own awkwardness. Stranger things had happened before in Elena's private chambers.

She chuckled, but it wasn't soft and tender as usual.

" Oh, so now I have to spill out all my little secrets for you. It's not very fair, don't you think, that you ask that of me while you keep playing mysterious and hide away from me nearly everything about you ? That looks like manipulation to me. Were you toying with my desires all along, Interrogator ?"

Heinrix clenched his jaw, feeling both annoyed and confused. Oh, by the Throne, Elena was really not playing nice today.

" What are you even saying, von Valancius ? I didn't say anything like that. "

Some colors had returned to her cheeks. Anger suited her well. She straightened and, through her fatigue, managed to look him up and down.

" I am saying you are a hypocrite, van Calox."

Heinrix looked her dead in the eye, inhaling through gritted teeth, feeling the anger rise within him as well. Sadly, it didn't help him put a lid over his own desire. His fantasies felt even more burning than before, more demanding. If he stayed near her, he was going to lose it. Time to go.

" Fine. If you want to dodge the question and keep your little secret so bad, then so it shall be. I won't be bothering you again. "

And he shall know what was going on anyway, through any other means at his disposal. He stepped away from her and out of the shower, searching for a towel and his uniform. He felt ridiculous doing all of that with his erection palpitating painfully between his legs. A blush came to his cheeks and he quickly hide himself away.

" That's rich, coming from someone who won't take a look too closely at himself in the mirror for fear of what he might see. "

His hands tightened in a strict grip around his clothes. He resented Elena for her piques. She was acting like an idiot. She was not an idiot. But also, her unstoppable overstepping made him want to do things to her…oh, that woman was putting him through so many troubles. Out, out, out. He needed to go.

" Be careful of your words. I will remind you that you are speaking with an official envoy of the Inquisition", he said coldly.

The argument was probably risible from the exterior, as two very naked and aroused people were snapping at each other while trying to dry their hair. Only their sense of pride and duty was preventing them from turning this into foreplay.

In between lingering longer in the presence of Elena, the most unnerving and annoying woman in the Expanse, and putting on his uniform without completely being dry, Heinrix opted for the second option and exited (fled) to the main room. His breeches chafed uncomfortably around his waist, reminding him of the contradictory feelings the Rogue Trader conjured in him.

His apparition sent a maid jolting to fer feet and fleeing behind some curtains into the domestic's passage. That poor maid would have to live the rest of her life with a vision of a barely clothed van Calox rushing towards her. Heinrix hated himself for that and forced himself to regain some composure. When had he gone so sensitive to Elena's moods ?

Elena followed soon after, covering herself with a towel. Heinrix was glad the maid was gone. The rumors…ah…there would definitely be rumors to quench.

" Ah ! As if I could ever forget. That is all you are in the end. "

She seemed to regret her words instantly, as she bit her lips harshly the next second and put her hands to her mouth.

Heinrix remained seemingly unfazed, though every word they had exchanged agitated the turmoil inside him. He flashed her a cold look.

" For this one time, Elena, I will turn a blind eye to your careless manners and behavior, in the name of our…" He struggled with the words. Relationship ? Certainly not ! Friendship ? Ridiculous. "...past collaboration. "

His choice of words brought a redness to Elena's cheeks. He had hurt her with that, he knew. He gathered all the majesty he could utter and unwrinkled his uniform.

" I won't be as forgiving next time. It is better if we keep a sense of formality between us. Please make an effort to behave more appropriately in the future. "

And he left her like that, with those words he didn't mean, that put a fortress between him and the storm that was Elena in his life.

She looked at him with widened eyes. A regretful expression passed over her eyes.

He looked away and left her.

He left her.

The fool.