Rehabilitating Assholes
Hi yall!
Same as usual,
ShikaxFem!Naru
This is not all cannon, clearly though many parts remain.
I love constructive criticism.
Flame me and I will ignore you. ^.^V
NOT EDITED. I wrote a ton over the week in a few different stories. I would love a beta reader, if interested, drop me a line.
Shikamaru Nara was not please.
He found himself, tucked back in a restaurant surrounded by the loud and boisterous Rookie 8.
And he was angry. Angry in a way he was quite unfamiliar with.
Pulling back into his shadows, his sharp handsome features pale and hard, pulled down into a slow, lazy frown.
It was a drag.
The effort to wade through them all to get out of the restaurant was not worth it, but . . . He didn't want to be here.
Sipping on sake and smoking in the corner, this was not something he needed to do. With ear splinting kunoichi and thundering shinobi, arguments and gales of laughter.
Kami-sama was his head beginning to pound. Going for another drink, he found the night was against him. His sake bottle had run dry. And it was too troublesome to get more.
Nicotine it is then.
As he turned his body away from the low table he had sat cross legged at, to look out the window to his right, left arm propping up his head, hand buried in his dark, spikey hair, pulling bits from his ponytail, not that he cared.
Glancing out of the corner of his eye, he noted a tan arm, wrapped in orange as only one he knew could pull that off. He also noted said hands, offer of a pour of more sake.
Eyebrow raised but offering his cup for fill, he nodded his thanks. Hmmm . . . There little corner, he noted was quiet, even with the usually noisy blonde. Naruto was being quiet; a calm, gentle smile curling one side of his lips.
Observant and quiet. Interesting.
Naruto gestured next him, asking for his permission to sit. He nodded, slowly, hoping the blond would continue to not talk too much. He hadn't the temper for it, a rarity for him he was struggling with, he knew.
He found in the next 15 minutes his curiosity piqued. Naruto hadn't said a word. He just kept the alcohol flowing and watched the crowd that was their friends.
When Naruto finally spoke, it was NOT what Shikamaru had ever expected.
Naruto turned to him, blue eyes bright, serious and sad. He reached in his pocket, slowly depositing a small box on the table. "I think he'd want you to have this," he shared, tone more solemn than Shikamaru had ever heard from the rambunctious, happy blonde.
"If you wanna talk, or hear about the story of this," pointing at the little box and using one finger to push it a bit closer to the Nara Clan Heir, "feel free to stop by."
With that, Konoha's number one most unpredictable shinobi stood and slipped out, the throng of friends none the wiser.
Glancing at the box, Shikamaru was intrigued. What on Earth would Naruto have from someone for him? Gently fingering the worn, black lacquered box, he gripped the top to flip it open.
What he saw made his mouth drop.
His mind stopped for a moment as emotions flooded him, chocking him.
He knew he was approaching tipsy, but he's eyes began to tear at the sight of this tiny trinket that had somehow gotten into that blonde knucklehead's possession. But how? Troublesome.
Looking closer, he had to be sure.
Nestled in dark red velvet, it was a single earring, a stud. The front was made for a gem he didn't know, so deep red it was almost black until light hit it. It was in the shape of a flame.
Gently rolling it in his shaking hands, he had to be sure it had belonged to who he thought, his chest tight as he silently hoped. He sucked in a breath, noting there was no mistake. The back was in silver, with brushed and polished sections. They together formed the symbol for the Sarotobi clan.
Bowing his head in grief, he breathed.
How was Naruto the only one to know the significance of this day?
It was the first anniversary of their sensei's death.
Well, being fair, others noticed, but for him, drinking and laughing. . . It wasn't what he needed.
He gently placed it back in the box, taking all the care in the world to make sure it was nestled and safe as he placed it in his Jounin jackets innermost pocket.
He sat for a moment. Just breathing. Trying to calm down, knowing this was a good thing, right?
Breaking a frustrated sign, he put out his cigarette, making up his mind.
He needed to thank Naruto, and he could use a bit of quiet and that story. Hopefully the man had a bottle of liquor to share too.
He arrived at Naruto's apartment, unsure. But less than a minute of his pausing before the door and the blonde simply opened it and walked away. An invitation with no strings.
Good friend for tonight indeed.
It surprised him, that it would be Naruto, though the man did know how to make friends just about anywhere. He clearly had missed parts of this curious person he called friend. Not that they had ever been overly close.
He walked in and found Naruto packing a bag. Eyebrow raised he looked on. Naruto continued, appearing oblivious.
Once he appeared to have everything he needed, he looked up and smiled at Shikamaru. It had just hit him that again, the room hadn't been filled with constant chatter.
Maybe I'm more drunk than I thought or maybe I have to hang out with Naruto more?
"Yosh, come on Shikamaru-kun," the young man stated, leading to his door.
"Naruto. . . " the lazy brunette couldn't help the frustration in his voice.
Naruto's face was patient, calm.
"Trust me," he implored, looking dead on at the shadow user.
The blonde waited, patiently again, for the shadow users, consent.
Not seeing it, he sighed. The Nara's posture was coiled, angry. Angrier than Naruto had ever seen. He wanted to help, had watched that anger eat another friend for years. He would not give up with either of them, whether or not they wanted him to.
He knew pushing wasn't going to work though.
In response to said thoughts, Naruto then looked down, trying to break contact, give Shikamaru a bit more emotional space. Help him see, it just wanted to share, help, fight if he must. He hoped he could help him share though. "This, this was his favorite spot," he shared, quieter now.
Angered brewed within the Nara Clan Head. He knew he had no patience, that letting anger fester was dangerous, but he had never felt this white-hot flash before. He couldn't help it; he was tipsy and grieving and Naruto was punking him?
"How dare you mess with this? How would you even know that?" Shikamaru spat, a snarl on this face, eyes, dark and flashing, arm already cocked and swinging.
For Naruto, it was largely unexpected, and he made no efforts to dodge or protect himself. He knew Shikamaru was struggling, though he hasn't quite thought it was this bad. Or would escalate so fast. He went flying before his brain could register it, his head striking the edge of his granite countertop, a flash of light filling and then darkening his vision. That's gonna leave a mark, he thought, dazed.
And Shikamaru may not look powerful, but damn could that man pack a punch. He was their Jounin Commander after all.
As his eyes slowly, dizzily came back into focus. Struggling to looking up at the seething man, he put his hands out, to pacify, to show he was no threat, as he tried speaking in a calming tone, nausea rushing over him.
"Shikamaru-kun, I spent much of my childhood with the Third. . . Of course, I knew his son, . . . Well in fact." He spoke simple and plainly, knowing it worked best with Shikamaru's analytical brain.
Shikamaru jerked, frozen as he looked at his friend laying before him. What had his alcohol riddled brain just done? He was not a hothead. Far from it. Not that his actions tonight would be any indication. He had known Naruto was close to the Third. It made perfect sense. His face crumbled.
Body stiff, ramrod straight back unlike his usual slouch, Shikamaru mumbled an apology and was already moving to the door before Naruto's rattle brain could register it. The world swum and he knew he had at least a moderate concussion.
"Don't you run away from this," the blonde wincing as he sat up, growled at the taller man, wincing as he reached to touch the back of his head. Naruto knew the taller man would just clam up if they didn't deal with this. Not that he loved being a punching bag, but he was used to it. He was willing. His friend had to feel. He hoped through words after this though, he thought, wincing. He wasn't sure if tonight his head to take much more.
"Naruto. . . " Shikamaru breathed, hands clenched, eyes wild and angry, nose flared, the clenching for his jaw visible from the moving knots in his cheek. The shadows dancing around him as he stood, tensed near the poorly lit doorway to Naruto's home. He looked like a caged animal.
"I have to leave," as he turned away again.
"No, you don't!" The blonde raised his voice, making the Nara glance at him as the blonde began to lever himself into a standing position.
Except, he got about halfway when the Jounin Commander's eyes met the blondes. Naruto's eyes seem to cloud, unfocused, expression slackening, followed by his eyes beginning to roll up into his head, his body tipping, limp, again backwards towards said countertop.
Shikamaru's anger fled him, his chest clenching. He had to shunshin to his friend's side, catching him before he finished falling back and hit his head again on his . . . the Nara winced, already bloody countertop.
Slumped slightly on his side, he noted a large red stain growing on the back of Naruto's bright blonde hair and shirt.
Cursing, the young man kicked himself mentally. He had hit Naruto, hard. And clearly the counter had hit hard back.
He knew head injuries bled a lot, but this somewhat worrisome. He also knew, having received reports that day, that Naruto had just been on an S-class mission, only released from the hospital today. He wasn't even allowed on duty for 3-4 weeks, his injuries so severe. He hadn't even read through said injuries. 'The medical core would handle it' had been his thought at the time.
And he had just knocked him out. Because he, for all his genius, was an idiot. He grumbled, why did he hear that last part in Ino's voice too? Troublesome.
Cursing under his breath, he moved to roll Naruto in his arms and pick him up, when he jolted, a loud poof and smoke surrounding him. A henge had just dissipated. What the hell was going on?
The smoke cleared, only to hurt Shikamaru's brain more. In place of Naruto, was a beautiful woman. She looked similar to the blonde tricksters Sexy no Jutsu, but this woman looked more . . .real.
What was this, more pranks?
He brought his hand up, gently to the back of this Naruto's? head and felt something hot, warm and sticky. Blood. Their left cheek was definitely swelling and bruising too.
What. The. Fuck.
The Nara knew he had questions. So many questions. But first, he had to get Naruto off the floor and to stop bleeding all over it.
He lifted him/her up, noting she was much shorter in this form. He laid her on the bed in the too-small bedroom and he went to the bathroom for the first aid kit. And found none.
The Kyuubi. He mentally groaned, eyes rolling in frustration at the thought. Of course, Naruto never put much care into wounds, he (she?) never really had to. Grumbling, he went to Naruto's closet for a clean cloth of some sort and did find a few packs of gauze in a mission scroll.
Returning, he made quick work to turn her carefully and inspect the wound. It was deep, very deep. Now he frowned. He was pretty sure he could see bone. Okay, he may need to call for back up.
But who could he tell? Was Naruto really a female? Had he missed this? And had he really knocked it out of her?
God he couldn't get over the notion that he was a complete ass.
His headache was growing. Groaning, he know there was only one person with medical experience who owed him. He could call their Hokage, if anyone knew it was Tsunade, but he had a feeling they were not supposed to know. And for some reason that thought bothered him. He didn't have room for it tonight. He would think on it when his brain was clearly more up to its normal capacity.
But Ino, Ino was partially why he was so irrationally frustrated, angry and if he got down to it, hurt tonight.
Ino hadn't told him of Chouji's and her engagement. Not that they were dating but engaged. And expecting. Not that they had shared that part yet. Once he had taken a moment to notice, it was obvious. He was their best friends since childhood. And they hadn't even taken a moment to tell, share with him privately. Let alone apologized for not giving him a moment to be their best friend. And they had taken today, the day that should be about Asuma-sensei to announce it. To everyone, including him.
And he had seen the look on their faces. They had seen his shock, betrayal. Ino had shot him a look of apology, concern, but it was too little, too late. This was one of the biggest things in their lives. And they had forgotten to mention? For how long? Let alone tell him even a day before they announced?
He wasn't trying to be self-centered either. He had no issue they wanted to be private til now. But he had seen them, alone, yesterday. And he was too lazy for rumors, that was all Ino. So why hadn't they trusted him?
And why had they chosen today of all days?
Thus why he ended up blindingly angry in a restaurant wanting to drink and smoke himself into oblivion.
A quick missive, he sent to the blonde, knowing, oh he knew she would respond. She couldn't drink and Chouji, well he had been letting loose. She was bound to be winding down from it. And they knew each other well.
She owed him for this, and she would know it.
Not 5 minutes later, she was at the door.
She paused, looking more nervous that he had seen in a while.
"Ino," he acknowledged, measured and cool.
They stared for a few minutes. She may work in T&I, but Shikamaru was no slouch. And Ino was rarely one to deal with a guilty consciousness.
"I-I, I'm so sorry Shikamaru," she shared quietly, tearing up.
Troublesome, he hadn't wanted her to cry on her engagement night, angry as he was. He took a moment to collect himself, arms crossed in frustration.
"Congratulations," he murmured.
She looked up at him, so sad, and he sighed. This night was just not going his way. He should have stayed in bed.
"Sh-Shika-" he knew is was about to break into tears and she was his best friend, along with Chouji. And he wasn't truly an angry man, just hurt.
He stepped forward unfolding his arms to envelop his friend in a warm hug.
She cried. Only for a moment or two, but both knew she needed to let it out. And he knew even if she hadn't shared yet, being pregnant her hormones were likely all over the place.
He really was trying not to be an ass.
She pulled away, sniffling, as she looked down, tucking some of her white-blonde hair behind her ear.
"We didn't mean to." She blurted out as she looked up at him. "To not share, to not include you, we just . . . we needed to make sure it was real. Not just friendship," She explained, eyes pleading him to understand.
"Considering you were close enough to make a baby . . .," eyebrow raise, with a pointed look. He couldn't help getting that out, yup he was an ass.
She flushed, mouth left opened and stunned. She quickly recovered, blushing.
"Yes, you are right, . . .stupid geniuses," She capitulate, both apologetic and slightly annoyed. She looked back up at him, sadder that he had seen in a long time. "We wanted today to be about something happy, to honor his efforts, his caring for us, raising us," She shared, ice blue eyes pleading with his dark ones. Asuma-sensei . . so she had seen how he reacted.
He blew out a breath. He knew Ino and Chouji were . . lighter, kinder, happier that he was. Not his possessive, lazy, dark self. He understood. It was one of the things that made them work as best friends. They weren't like him. They complemented him, pushed him, but they weren't like him.
He nodded to her, showing his understanding.
She had to know though, understand.
"I don't do that Ino-chan. I understand, but I'm hurt and I can't-" He cut himself off, trying to make the words come out, his throat tightening. "I can't grieve him like that," he implored.
Ino watched her friend, his pale face tight and sad, lazy though it may also look. She grabbed him then hugged him.
"You do what ever you need to. I love you, I'm sorry. And I promise I will never keep things like this from you again. But you do what ever you need for Asuma-sensei or how you feel," She shared, voice shaky and wet, knowing she was hurting, feeling too.
He choked a sob and finally, let the pressure in his chest overwhelm him. Hot tears rolled from his tightly shut eyes as he quietly cried into his best friend's shoulder. The only people who had ever really kept up with him or at least understood most his plight, were his father and Asuma-sensei. And being a genius, not just with jutsus or Nin clan stuff, but a true blue, bored with the world genius, could be lonely.
Well and surprisingly tonight a certain blonde. He froze, groaning. How had he managed to continually feel like he was screwing up tonight.
Ino appeared surprised to see him pull away so quickly.
"Ino," he started and found himself pausing. "Ino, I need you to keep this to yourself," He stated, deadly serious, dark eyes boring into hers. Her eyes widened. It was rare she knew for her friend to care beyond his laziness enough to be so focused or serious. Silently she nodded.
He should his head.
"No, Ino, I need to know. This isn't my secret to keep. And I have yet to understand it all. And they need your medical assistance," her eyes widened further as she nodded.
"I promise, Shikamaru-kun, I do. You do know about patient confidentiality, right?" She had finished with a quip and he was grateful for the lighthearted attempt.
Her face screwed up as she looked at Shikamaru. "Shikamaru-kun, if we are in Naruto's apartment . . " her eyes widened as she strode through the bedroom door.
What she saw left her agape. He couldn't help but agree, though for more reasons than her likely.
The woman on the bed was beautiful and with whiskers, blonde hair, tanned skin, unmistakably Naruto-esque.
Golden waves cascaded along her pillow, pleasantly tanned and whiskered heart shaped face relaxed in sleep (unconsciousness his snarky mental voice supplied), delicate golden eyebrows above long golden lashes, sadly her blue eyes closed. She had a cute, button nose with arrows bow lips, plump and pink in the night as well as from the light cast from her living room. Ample breasts almost spilling from a black tank top telling him she was at least a DD on her short frame, small waist with a strip of tan skin showing off her toned abs and he couldn't how much of an ass she had, but she had hips, a nice hourglass figure. He found himself wanting to see her legs, smooth and tan and shapely, if he had to hazard a guess.
Well, now I am an ass and a pervert, He though ruefully.
Sweatdropping mentally, he spoke. "She, her head," he pointed at the back of his. How does he tell Ino he punched her?
He could see all the questions but first Ino moved forward, placing her green glowing hands above their friend.
Her eye widened, shooting a look at Shikamaru. Worry grew as he saw her work.
"Ino-chan," he pressed, he had to know.
The white-blonde woman gently turned her, getting a better look at the wound. She cleaned the dried blood and he noted he couldn't see white anymore.
"Naruto-k-chan?" She shook her head in confusion, continuing, "They just came back from a mission yes?" she queried.
He nodded. It was classified, there was nothing else he could share, though now he had wished he had read the medical reports.
She nodded at this silence, understanding as she placed a bandage over wound. "She," the blonde stressed, and he breathed. It was true, Kami-sama Naruto was a female, biologically.
He struggled to tune back into what the medic nin was saying as she worked to clean up the blondes hair and position her patient more comfortable in bed. "She is incredibly chakra depleted. I'm guessing that is why what ever henge-thing they had used failed. Incredibly so, Shikamaru-kun," she looked pointedly at him. "She needs to rest, complete rest, for at least a week or two. I would suggest she is off duty for 4-6 weeks. That head injury is deep, and she has a small subdural hematoma, bleed on the brain. It looks like the Kyuubi handled it, but she has to use her energy to safely convert the Kyuubi's chakra to something she can use. She didn't have the chakra to spare for that. In response, her body chose to repair the bleed vs the henge. It was the right move, but . ." She trailed off.
He sighed, how troublesome.
"What else," he asked, seeing Ino still had items she was tallying in her head.
Glancing up at him, she spoke while continuing to sit on the bed next to the smaller blonde, gently stroking her hair and forehead. "She has a lot of damage to a large number of bones, muscles, organs. They are healing, none of them are life threatening anymore but . . ." she trailed off shrugging.
But even with the Kyuubi the jinchurikii was in a sorry state.
He groaned and leaned his back against the windows edge in Naruto's room, lighting up a cigarette. Ino glared. Fuck, pregnant. He shot her an apologetic look and quickly put in out and back in his pack for later.
She nodded her thanks and stood up.
"It's late, I'm tired," she hesitated. "Are-Are we good, Shika-kun?" She asked, quiet and looking more insecure than he could remember.
His eyes softened and he nodded. She brightened and bounce to him for a hug. Crazy, pesky troublesome woman he groused, small smile tugging his lips all the while.
She looked up as she pulled away. "I will be back tomorrow to check on her . . . . and talk," the last part looking pointedly at him. He winced and nodded, hand up in a wave as she left the apartment.
What an unpredictably troublesome night.
Well, he thought, it was fitting. It was Naruto afterall, Konohagakure's number one prankster and knucklehead. Chuckling he moved to the kitchen to make some tea to help him pass this night of vigil.
His eyes caught site of the blood-stained counter. Grimacing, he grabbed a paper towel and some water and cleaned it off for the woman. He then put some water on for tea and as he leaned on the counter, arms folded, letting his mind run over the evening's events, he noted the basket from earlier. Just what had she been planning?
Paced over to the basket h-she? had made before his irrationality got the best of him. It was packet with snacks, a blanket, even alcohol and a pack of cigarettes for him. And one other wrapped gift.
God he was an ass.
But currently a curious and somewhat hungry one. He quickly made a cup of tea, while grabbing a few snacks and the cigarettes, he moved to her bedside, setting the snacks on a chair he had placed next to her bed for his vigil to wait for her to wake. For now, a cigarette and to think.
Glancing again as he puffed on a cigarette, glad she had grabbed him some. He was on his last, as he had chain-smoked through them in the restraint. Now, that he was alone, he couldn't help his eye roaming over the woman on the bed. She was breathtaking. Sold, flawless tan skin with cherub cheeks, 3 marks on each. Blonde hair in bouncy silky waves of spin sunshine. Laying there, he could see more curves, then we're ever right to be hide by a baggy work out suit.
Rolling his eyes as his new, self-discovered perverted status, he let his mind drift, trying to determine what he would do next. Looking out the window of Naruto's warm if small and crappy apartment, he found he couldn't even guess. And the notion both irked and amused him.
Glancing wryly at her as he studied her face, he decided as he sat down to some amazing snacks (who knew the ramen-obsessed woman could cook) that he had a good view to wait and see what she would do next.
Hope you enjoyed!
Ja ne!