What if Hailey died in the explosion? I also hid a small secret in this, can you find it? Please review! It motivates me to get more things uploaded sooner!

The last thing that Hailey ever heard or saw what the explosion that took her life that day. The last thing she ever felt was blinding pain searing through her body.

Jay groaned as he rolled over, many small cuts everywhere on his body. It kicked in, the need to see if Hailey was OK. He got to his knees, looking around and saw her lying on the ground.

"Hailey!" He shouted. Jay scrambled to his feet and ran over.

"Hailey, wake up!" He frantically put two fingers against her neck but didn't feel the thump against his fingers. He put his hands on her chest, performing chest compressions. He barely noticed Gabby and Shay running over to them. Shay got out the intubation kit, and intubated Hailey.

"Are you OK, Jay?" Gabby quickly asked. Jay nodded, "I'm fine. I didn't feel a pulse," He said, referring to Hailey and focusing on what he was doing. Gabby put her on the monitors, then set up the defibrillator and charged it.

"Clear!" She warned. Both Jay and Shay stepped back and Gabby shocked Hailey's heart. Shay checked for a pulse, and Jay resumed CPR. Shay shook her head, "Nothing," Gabby charged the defibrillator again.

"Clear!" Again, they all stepped back. The monitor beeped a few times, signalling that there was a pulse.

"We got a pulse, let's go!" Shay shouted. Gabby and Shay lifted Hailey into the ambo and Jay climbed in. To Jay, the drive to Med couldn't have been any longer. Gabby and Shay led Hailey into the hospital, letting the doctors take over, but not after letting the doctor, who was Connor Rhodes, know some information.

"Hailey Upton, 29, caught in explosion. No pulse found, but defibrillator used twice. Heart rate 59, BP 99/45. Intubated on scene,"

Connor took over the gurney, leading it into a room. A moment after Hailey was transferred to the bed, the machines went off again.

"She's crashing!" He immediately began chest compressions, "Push 1 of EPI," He ordered.

"Pushing EPI," A nurse said. The EPI was pushed, and Connor was still doing CPR.

"Charge the paddles," He ordered. The closet nurse did so, "Charging," Connor took hold of the paddles, placing them on Hailey, "Clear!" He shocked her, and the monitor continued to let out a long beep.

"Charge again," As soon as it was, he all but shouted, "Clear!" Connor shocked Hailey again, but the monitor stayed the same.

"Clear!" He shocked her for a third time, but now it was the fifth time altogether. He continued chest compressions, refusing to accept that he couldn't save her.

"Dr. Rhodes…," A nurse put her hand on his shoulder, "Dr. Rhodes, she's gone," Connor slowly stopped compressions, looking at the clock.

"Time of death, 16:22," He groaned. Connor left the room, ripping off his gloves in anger. He was tempted to punch a wall. Instead, he walked over to Jay, knowing that he had to explain what happened.

"I'm sorry, but Hailey coded. She most likely had severe internal injuries. I'm sorry, but we couldn't save her," He gave Jay a soft look.

As soon as Jay heard those words, his entire world came crashing down on him. He tried to believe that this was just a dream. A dream where he would wake up being yelled at by Voight to wake up. He'd rather that. But Jay knew that it wasn't a dream, that he couldn't go back in time.

Hailey was gone. He'd never hear her laugh or yell at him. He'd never see the smile that crept upon her face when she saw him. He'd never get work with her again. Worst of all, Jay never confessed his love for her, and now it was too late. He lost his chance at love with a woman he truly loved.

"C-Can I see her? One last time?" Jay's voice was cracking. Connor nodded and let him into the room. Jay gently kissed her forehead, "I'm so, so, so, sorry, Hailey. I never should have left you like that. It should have been me. I should be here right now. I love you so, so, so, so, so, much. I should have said this to you earlier. Maybe this wouldn't have happened. I love you, Hailey Anne Upton," Jay cried harder than any other time. He gently kissed her again, leaving. He couldn't bear this. By now, the entire unit was in the waiting room. They didn't know her condition yet.

Jay met up with them, his face a mess from crying and from the explosion. As soon as Intelligence saw him, they all stood up. He shook his head, and they all knew what he meant. A beloved person from their unit was no longer with them. After a few minutes of crying, Connor met up with them, holding a bag.

"This is everything that Hailey had with her," He passed the bag to Jay, and left. Jay pulled out her badge, running his finger over her name. He gripped the badge, the sides digging into his hand. Kim slowly walked over to him and hugged him tightly. The rest of the unit followed after, knowing that Jay would have the hardest time processing her death out of all of them.

"I'm so sorry, man," Adam muttered. When they all let go of Jay, he dug around the bag. He wanted to see what she had with her. He pulled out her vest, which was a bit mangled, but still intact. It was still wearable, but Jay knew that no one was going to. The next thing Jay pulled out was her gun. He wanted to keep it. Jay didn't think he would be able to, since it was a service weapon and someone in the future could use it. He handed it to Voight.

"Keep it, Jay. It'll be fine," He gruffly said. Jay made sure it was unloaded, and on the safety lock, which it was. Connor must have had security disarm it. The last thing that was in the bag, next to her clothing, was a picture. When Jay looked at it, he smiled. It was a picture of him and Hailey together. Jay never knew that she had it with her. But now the picture, along with everything else, reminded him that she was gone. Jay put everything back in the bag and sat down. He let even more tears fall, not knowing that even more were able to fall from his eyes, and his heart sank even lower. His world was so full and happy with Hailey in it. Now, it was just a blackhole. Sure, he loved his unit and brother, but Hailey was the light of his life. She was the sun, and he revolved around her. She told him to back off when he got rough, despite his strength to attempt to barrel through. She was strong and managed to hold him back and helped through the hardest times of his life. She kept him from murdering Bunny during the whole Erin and the FBI fiasco. But now there was no one to pull him back when he got worked up. No one. And he didn't want anyone but her. Jay was going to need a new partner, and he could live with that. But no matter who was Jay's new partner, they would never replace Hailey's spot. They could earn his respect, but they would never earn his love.

"Jay," Adam's voice cut through his trance, and he looked up, "Everyone's left already. I said I'd drive you back to your place. Or back to the bullpen. Voight said that you could take time off if you needed to," Jay shook his head, "I-I can't go back," Jay had entered this hospital with the hope that his partner would be all right, and he didn't want to leave without Hailey. Not while knowing that she would never come home.

"Jay, I know it's hard, man. It's going to be brutal, knowing that she'll never come back. But Hailey wouldn't want you to break. She'd want you to stay strong, for her," Adam's phone buzzed, "Voight wants to see you," Adam led Jay into his car and drove him back to the district. Adam buzzed Jay up and led in him to Voight's office and closed the door behind him.

"You wanted to talk to me, Sarge?" Jay mumbled. He looked at his hands fidgeting in his lap, not wanting a speech about how the unit was his family. But that's not what he got. Instead, he got something completely different.

"I remember when Camille died," Voight started. Jay looked up, not expecting what Voight said. He continued.

"There was nothing I could do to save her. Nothing that would bring the bubbly Camille back. I felt so helpless, that I couldn't do anything to bring her back. Back to Justin," Voight was now referring to his son.

"I should have been where she was," Jay started shaking slightly, "I should've been there. She should be here right now, talking and laughing with the unit. It's not fair!" Jay all but shouted, "She doesn't deserve this!"

"Jay, I know. She was a great detective, and a great friend. She didn't deserve any of this," Voight was now kneeling beside Jay, hand on his shoulder.

"I watched so many people die in Afghanistan. What's one more, right?" Jay sadly smiled. Voight shook his head, "You're wrong. Yes, you watched many people die in your time. And you've had people die in your arms. And it hurts that you couldn't save everyone, it still does. So many innocent lives were lost, and they shouldn't have been. They weren't involved in the war, and yet, they were still killed. There was nothing you could've done. And it's the same with Hailey. There was nothing you could've done to prevent the bomb from going off. This is what fate chose, and I wish it didn't happen. This world lost a great person, a great friend, and a great detective today," Voight may have had a raspy voice that made him sound intimidating, but he knew how to make someone feel better.

Jay swallowed. Hard. He hated crying. He was taught in the Army that men weren't to cry. But ever since joining Intelligence, he was slowly learning that he was allowed to cry when he needed to. But he still hated to do so. So, he tried to hold in it at all times, but when he learned that Hailey wasn't coming home, he had to let it out.

"Who's going to be in Intelligence next?" Jay asked. Voight sighed, "I don't know," He changed the subject, "What do you want to do now? Go home? Stay?" Voight figured he wouldn't want to go to his apartment, and he guessed right.

"Can I stay here?" Jay voice was still shaking. Voight nodded, "Of course. Intelligence is taking a few days off, so there's just paperwork that doesn't have to be done quite yet. If you want to do it to get your mind off something, feel free. But as soon as I say, you're going back to your apartment, or somewhere else. I don't care where you go, as long as it's not here, because you're not spending the night here. Got it?"

"Copy. Anything else?" Jay asked, and Voight shook his head. Jay went to his desk, choking back a sob as he saw Hailey's empty desk. He tore his gaze off the desk and picked up his pen. As usual, there was always a ton of paperwork to do, and Jay burned through a ton of it before Voight made him go home. When Jay protested, Antonio stood up.

"Jay, it's late. Most of the unit has left already, you can't stay here forever. Come on, I'll drive you home," Antonio led Jay into his car. When Antonio took a wrong turn, Jay pointed it out, "You were supposed to take a left back there,"

"I know," Antonio replied, "But I'm not taking you home yet. Just taking you someplace outside, quiet. I got beers in the back," Antonio figured that Jay would want a beer or two to take his mind off of everything that happened. And he was right. As soon as Antonio stopped the car, Jay got the 6-pack form the backseat and took one. He sat on the grass and took a long drink from the bottle. Antonio joined him, drinking from his own bottle. They sat in silence, Jay lost in space, Antonio hoping Jay would say something.

"Do you remember when we first met her?" Antonio asked Jay, referring to Hailey. Jay nodded, "We had a case, but her unit wanted it. Chief ended up giving it to us and Hailey wasn't impressed," He smiled. That was a time when they didn't like Hailey that much. Times changed, though.

*Two weeks after the explosion*

Jay looked in the mirror, in uniform. Today was Hailey's funeral. He swallowed, remembering when Hailey would fix the tiniest things, like adjusting where his tie was, or if his hat was crooked. So, now he made sure that everything was perfect. Everything was freshly cleaned and ironed. His hair was combed, still damp from showering. He got into his car, driving to the funeral place. Memories raced through his mind as the field came into place. It was a nice field, one that Hailey loved.

Jay only expected family and the CPD, so he was surprised when he saw the CFD and some doctors and nurses from Med. This meant a lot to him, his entire family coming. CPD, CFD, and Med were all one huge family who had each other's backs.

Jay saw Hailey's brothers, and walked over to them. They turned around to see him. Jay held out his hand, "I'm, uh, I'm Jay Halstead. I was Hailey's partner," Each of the brothers shook his hand.

"Hi, Jay," The youngest said, "I'm Josh, that's Sammy and Toby," He pointed to the other two, "We appreciate you taking care of our sister all these years. She spoke so highly of you when visiting," His eyes were glassy. Jay was surprised. Hailey spoke highly of him? He cleared his throat, "I loved having her as my partner. I want you guys to know that no one will ever replace her in the CPD. She left a piece of her there that will always stand," He said. And every word was true to his soul.

The funeral started shortly after that. Hailey's life was told, her life struggles and achievements. How she came to be a detective. Her life as a detective.

"And now, Jay Halstead would like to come up and say a few words," The priest said. Jay stood up, walking to the podium. He cleared his throat.

"Hailey was best person you could have met. She never would've admitted that she was strong, but that she was weak. A weak, vulnerable person. That's what everyone is. But you choose how you handle life's struggles. She was a stubborn person, someone who never gave up. Her weaknesses showed up in times, but she had friends and family who helped build herself up. She never let anyone tell her she couldn't become a cop, or couldn't be strong, that being strong was for boys. Those words didn't go through her mind, though. She focused on the words that encouraged her to become the person she was. And she became the best damn detective Chicago's ever seen. She built up other people, showing them their true potential.

"Hailey helped me realize that had so much more to learn about myself. About my true potential. I was an army ranger before I became a detective, and she helped me through the times where I had flashbacks of my tours. Those actions meant everything to me. Even the smallest things she did for me, like make me a cup of coffee or bring to work if my car broke down, it showed that she cared. Not just worked alongside me as a partner. But I felt that our relationship could've gone further. I started to learn that I loved her. I didn't know what to think of these feelings, though. Hailey had a lot of trauma growing up, so I was afraid that if things didn't go well in between us, it would cause her too much pain. But she pushed through all that trauma and became a new person. I now realize that I should've stepped up and told her how I feel. Maybe she would've told me she felt the same way back. I'll never know what she felt. Life only gives up so many chances at love, and I lost mine. I lost my chance with the best woman a man could ask for. Her brothers are in the front row here," Jay pointed, "And I hope that they would've accepted me into their family if I stepped up earlier,"

Jay's eyes were filled with tears as he remembered her. He stepped down from the podium, walking to her casket. He put his hand on it, "Hailey, you were the best person ever. That explosion never should have happened. I hope you are happy in Heaven. I know that you will be watching over us as you guide us to success in life. Rest In Peace, Hailey Anne Upton,"