Rewrite

AvalonReeseFanFics

A/N: Alright guys. This is it. The last chapter of Steve being a jerk. After this there will be five chapters where things are normal, and then chapter 146 we start up with Steve the Jerk again. I know I've been counting down the chapters for the last three but I want you guys to be prepared. This chapter is gonna end on some cute stuff… and I mean… one of their standard make ups. And then we got the Halloween episode to look forward to next chapter. So you know, we got some interesting things happening. Side note, we're almost to 150 chapters. Do you guys want something special for the 150th chapter? Maybe a cute future chapter? Tell me what you think! See you guys on Friday!

Chapter 140

Grover had gone home after a long day of police work ready to sleep it off. Their bad guy had been caught, had threatened Rowan and Steve had been given her location and had gone to pick her up. No distress call had come so he assumed it was safe to relax. But he was only home for a half hour before someone start rapping on his door rapid fire. He opened up the door to a sobbing Rowan just staring up at him. He immediately looked over her shoulder for McGarrett but he wasn't there.

"Uh… Hi… uh"

"I don't have anywhere else," she hiccupped. "I don't have anyone who won't tell him…"

Uh-oh, another argument with McGarrett and a bad one by the looks of it. He put a hand out to her and ushered her into the house.

"Come on in, little momma, let's get you a tea, and some tissues and we'll talk it out."

"Please don't tell him I'm here… I know that's a lot to ask but I have no…"

"I ain't gonna tell McGarrett nothing. You forget I liked you before I liked him."

Renee popped her head out of the kitchen and blinked her eyes at Rowan in utter shock and then took her from Lou who just couldn't stand to see that poor girl cry. She was always so… happy, he had thought there wasn't a single thing in the world that could make her cry like that… but Steve McGarrett had proved them wrong.

Lou's phone rang and he went to grab it. Steven's name flashed on the screen and Rowan audibly gasped like she could see it was him from where she was.

"Don't you worry," he said, turning his back on the two women but he didn't take the call until he was on the porch and away from Rowan's voice so Steve couldn't hear her by accident.

"Grover."

"Lou!" came Steve's frantic voice. "Lou… I can't… I can't really explain but uh… have you seen… have you seen or heard from Rowan."

"I thought uh… I thought you pinged her location… she was at the beach, wasn't she? Did Sykes' guys grab her or something?"

"No. God. I don't know…"

"Okay can you slow down and explain from the beginning?"

"No, Lou, I don't know where she is. I have her phone…" "So you did find her?" "LOU! Look I've called everyone she would have gone to you're all I have left… have… you seen her or not?"

"Course I haven't, why would she come here anyway?" Grover asked.

Steve was silent, a groan may or may not have escaped his lips, though it might have also been a growl. "If you see her can you tell her I'm worried and… that… I'm sorry?"

"Shouldn't you tell her that yourself?"

"I'm FUCKING trying!" Steve shouted and then hung up the phone.

When Grover returned, Rowan was frantically unloading his pans and mixing bowls all while still crying. Apparently getting herself ready to bake. Renee, who had clearly been trying to calm her down and failing miserably, evidently gave up and was helping her find everything she was looking for.

When she was done Renee walked over to Lou and hissed: "She said something about being a monster and then she just declared that she was going to make cookies so like… is she having a psychotic break?"

"Don't know, I've never seen her like this," Grover said. "Far as I know her and Steve are just having another argument."

"Their arguments do that to her?"

"Well… I mean… not usually… this is a whole new spectrum I've never seen before. Usually they just yell at each other and then make out," Grover said.

Renee shook her head. "He must have done something awful."

"Look, he can't know she's here," Grover said. "If he knows he'll break down the door to get her. So we gotta keep this hushed up."

Grover sighed, watching as Rowan, without a recipe began to bake. He figured, if it would help her out, the least Grover could do was let her stay until she calmed down. How long could that take?

H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O

The doorbell rang and Steve lunged for it. Lou was standing on the stoop staring at him carefully. He handed Steve a pan of brownies. "Wanna brownie?" he asked as he let himself in.

Steve looked down at them. "Did uh… did Renee bake or something?"

"Or something," Grover said sitting down on his couch. Steve didn't have time for this, not when Rowan hadn't come home. Not when both he and Wo Fat couldn't fucking find her. This was the longest she had gone without being in contact with either of them and he didn't know what to do. Wo Fat was monitoring the channels but there was nothing about her being grabbed by anyone and none of Steve's friends had reporting seeing her… unless they had lied to him.

"I mean… tell her I said thanks," he said. "But uh… I kind of have a situation…"

"A missing girlfriend, yeah I know. How long has she been gone for?"

"I unno, all day, six hours? Okay… well… uh… unless you've seen her…" "What exactly were you two arguing about that sent her running this time?"

Steve paused, he slammed the brownies down on the coffee table and glared at him. "Nothing! We… we're fine…" Grover just stared at him. "Okay maybe we've been distant and weird but you heard what she did!"

"You're right. I did. She saved Danny's brother. She saved Danny's life. She got that missing 5.5 million when we couldn't…"

"Yes, and none of that seems… weird to you?"

"The girl comes from an alternate reality and that's what's weird to you?" Grover shot back. "Look… I don't know what's going on with you and her, but whatever it is, it's gone on long enough don't you think? Maybe… just get over your issues, McGarrett and apologize?"

"And how am I going to do that?" Steve snapped. "I can't fucking apologize if I can't fucking find her!"

He then paused and looked down to the pan of brownies on his coffee table and then back to Grover as if he had finally put it all together. "Rowan bakes when she's upset," he murmured. He then glared at Grover. Hope sung up into his heart. "You have Rowan don't you?"

"If by have you mean the girl showed up at my house sobbing and going on about how you called her a monster and then began to bake what is going to be a life time of baked goods in the span of six hours, then yes, I do have Rowan."

Sobbing. Oh god. Sobbing? She had been sobbing? He didn't need to hear that. He felt guilty enough as it was.

"Now, I'm not handing that girl over to you until I know for sure you're gonna fix this," he said. "Cause if I bring you over and you pull that usual shit you pull when you and her argue and nothing gets better Renee's gonna have your head and then mine."

But when Grover looked up into Steve's face and saw nothing short of panic and relief residing there, he knew that Steve needed to see her.

So, Grover let Steve get in his truck giving him all the tips and points that he could about what Steve needed to say to make all of this better. Steve practically sprinted up the walkway and up to the door but fell short at the door. He stood there staring at it like he was afraid to go talk to her.

So, Grover walked past him, opened the door and let him go in. Steve carefully made his way after Grover but when they got to the kitchen confident, suave McGarrett was just gone. He stared at Rowan with all the longing in the world. Watching as she cried and stirred the next round of batter she was making.

"Ro?" he asked weakly and she stopped stirring to look at him.

She blinked her teary eyes, the red tracks in her face bright red from all the crying and wiping she had been doing. "Steven?" He took half a step forward and her wide angry eyes turned to Grover as she shouted: "What happened to liking me before him?" Rowan snapped and Steve took a step back.

Renee, obviously responding to Rowan's cries, walked in, clocked Steve standing there and shouted: "Aw hell no! I better not be seeing Steven McGarrett in my kitchen because if I am you best go pack a bag Lou cause you're sleeping on that man's couch!"

"Now baby… baby…" Lou started.

"Naw, he's got the girl up here crying into fucking cupcakes and you bring him into the house? What happened to McGarrett can never know, huh? Where is your loyalty Lou?" she thundered, when he opened his mouth to argue she shut him down with the shake of her head and a: "Nuh-uh. Get out."

Steve actually took a step away, as if the big bad super seal was scared of Renee. "Baby. Think about what you just said. The girl's bake-cried her way through an entire bakery. She's made six dozen cupcakes, twelve cakes, ten batches of cookies and I don't even know how many bars and brownies. I think, if we ever want the baking to stop, she has to talk to the boy?"

"Why? So, I can be called a monster again and be told that I can't be trusted because my brother's a criminal? But it's perfectly fine for you to use the app he made for me to trace my phone whenever you need me?"

"Girl, he traced your phone cause you got threatened by a Samoan street thug," Grover cried.

Rowan threw down the whisk and glared at him. "What?"

"Wo's dealing with it," Steve answered in a soft voice and Rowan threw up her hands in frustration.

"Yeah but when I do it, I'm betraying you."

Steve blinked his eyes at her. "I never thought you were betraying me… it was just that… in your time of need you went to him and I… I felt like you… you didn't need me," Steve suddenly blurted out.

Rowan blinked her eyes at him and then narrowed them. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You were in trouble and you called him instead of me and I thought… I thought you didn't need me, okay?"

Rowan hastily peeled off Renee's apron and threw it down on the counter to storm around it to face off with Steve. Grover grabbed Renee and backed her away knowing full well what kind of arguments Steve and Rowan got into.

"How dare you!" Rowan snapped. "I called my brother to help me instead of you and you got jealous? That's what this has been about?"

Steve opened his mouth and Rowan put a hand up to stop him. "Shut up! I called my brother to help me with something illegal you fucking idiot!" she shouted. "I'm sorry, if I thought asking you to help me hide a fucking body might get you in trouble at work. I mean… you're just law enforcement."

"She needed a body hidden?" Renee hissed. "Did she kill someone?"

"Naw, witnessed a murder," Grover hissed back. "Just… just listen."

"Okay… that kind of makes…" he started but Rowan cut him off.

"This is not a competition Steve. This isn't a, well if I asked Wo Fat for this it means I don't need Steve anymore," she snapped. "He's my brother and there are certain things that he can help me with better than you can and vice versa. But that doesn't excuse your behaviour."

Steve nodded. "You're right."

"You went to your father's grave without me and then made me feel like I had no right to even be upset about it because I wasn't invited at all, that there was no way you were going to take someone like me to see him…"

"I was mad, okay? And I was scared and…" "Scared?" "Yes, Rowan, scared." "Of me?" "No, of this, of everything. I'm scared that body's gonna float up, I'm scared there will be retribution, I'm scared that I pushed you away a bit too far cause my feelings got hurt and I won't be able to fix it, I'm scared because I know you and Danny are hiding something and I don't want this to be like the Chin incident but today, today I was scared cause a man I was arresting asked me if I knew where you were and I didn't."

She stared at him a bit and then he added: "And a little bit of you…. If I'm being honest."

Both Grover's held their breath, he was doing so good until he spit that out. Rowan took a step away from him and Steve immediately put a hand out to her arm keeping her from getting too far from him.

"I'm scared of what you do, because I'm afraid I won't be able to protect you. I don't want to be in a position where me or my team has to arrest you. And I feel like… with every interaction, with every Rowan-gram I loose you a little bit more to that network, like you step a little bit further into the grey and closer to the dark side. And honestly… I'm seeing more of the ice queen then you these days."

"The app protects…"

"I know it does. And it's great when you use it for that, but that's not all you're using it for anymore. Don't get me wrong, it's great you saved Matty…" "I didn't use the app for that. The payment went through it cause I had to authorize it, but the actual order when through a middle man, not the app." "Oh. Oh. I guess I missed that part."

"Too busy freaking out about the body dump I guess."

Steve half laughed, a hand coming up to her face to brush some flour off of her cheek. "I don't want anything to happen to you Ro, that's all. And when you go out and find trouble… when you need me to rescue you from it… well… you know… with all the added stress I might actually have a real heart attack."

Rowan laughed. "You are old."

"Nine years, it's only nine years," he groaned, pulling her into another hug. His arms tight around her like he couldn't bare to let go. It was the softest of whispers but they all heard it: "You took off my tags."

Rowan pulled her head out of his chest, her eyes blinking at him. "No I didn't."

"You weren't wearing them this morning."

"Yes I was," she said, pulling them out from under her shirt. "See, they're right here."

"Oh… but when I hugged you… I couldn't… I couldn't feel them. I thought… I thought that meant you didn't… that you might not…"

"Well that's cause I had tucked them into my bra while I was getting ready. I forgot to take them out," she said. "I said I wouldn't take them off, and I meant it."

Steve smiled at her, tears of happiness almost falling. "Can you… can we… go home now?"

Rowan glanced back to the batter she had left and Renee quickly said: "I can finish it." And then Rowan looked around to all she had baked and Renee added: "I'll have a bake sale."

She pushed out of his grip and looked back up to Steve with those tears in her eyes. "But you won't stop looking at me like I'm a monster… you went to your father's grave without me…"

"I've been an idiot," he said. "I felt jilted, I felt unneeded, I'm trying not to see him in you but you do things and it's so much like him that I get scared. It doesn't feel good to know that you think I can't protect you."

"But you do protect me," she cried. "You're the one who's there when I have nightmares. You're the one who kills the spiders for me and helps me get down when I climb up on the counter and can't get back down. So there's been a string of situations I needed Wo Fat for, that doesn't mean I don't need you for everything else." She was silent for a moment before adding: "And Danny and I are not hiding anything, can you just… I mean I know you can't trust me, but can you trust him not to lie?"

Steve nodded. "I do trust… I'm trying to trust you more… and I wanted to take you today… but with us being so weird… and you know… it's my dad… and it's hard for me. I didn't want it to be even harder… you know?"

Rowan nodded like she understood but no one in that room was sure if she actually did understand.

Renee leant in as Steve suddenly just wrapped Rowan up in a tight embrace that they both seemed to be melded into and asked: "So like… are they good… cause I'm not sure they really fixed…"

"That's how all their arguments go… a lot of talking not a lot of fixing…"

"Great… so there's a good chance that she'll be back here in a week…" Renee muttered and Lou tried to hide his smile he looked around at all the baked goods filling up his kitchen and figured, eh, it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe for his waist line but his stomach would be really happy and so would his kids.

H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O

Jerry's mom had finally done it. Had finally moved. He had had a few friends come over to help, but after Rowan's little fire they hadn't really gotten much done, and he didn't want to call them down for a second round of packing, he was amazed he got as many people as he did for the original day. He made his way down to the basement to continue packing up on his own and found Farrow standing there.

Jerry came to a standstill because holy shit why the hell was he in his basement? How had he gotten in? How much did he know?

"Hello Mr. Ortega," he said. Oh god, he knew who he was.

"What are you doing here?" Jerry asked, trying to act like he was surprised, like he didn't know who Farrow was.

"Why… I'm returning your book," he said. "Did you ever read it? No? There's a passage in here that warns of the perils of meddling in someone else's affairs."

And then as if the guy couldn't get even more pretentious, he actually quoted the passage: he who does will face retribution.

Jerry didn't know where the bravery came from but he puffed out his chest and asked: "Do they have one about messing with people who have friends in high places?"

Farrow just laughed and as the bag went over his head, he heard him say: "Not even Five-0 can help you now."

H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O

Steve woke Rowan up early with a quick shake. They weren't all the way better yet. He was much less distant with her, as she requested, but he could still tell she was a little sad and he wanted her to be happy. So that morning, after spending the night, not worshiping her like he wanted to, but holding her to him because he was afraid she'd leave him in the night. He woke up sporadically, with each movement she made, and after confirming she was still there with him, he would bow his head to her shoulder, inhale her scent and tighten that grip.

By morning he had made up his mind. So, he woke her up, despite the early hours with a plan to make them better again.

"Oh god, why do you hate me?" she groaned and Steve half laughed because she knew it wasn't true.

He kissed her cheek and she rolled to him letting him kiss her, pulling him down so the length of him was against her. Her hips pressing up against his and that was him lost to the moment. They went on like this, for far too long before he managed to pull away and breathlessly whisper: "I want to take you some where special, can you get dressed up?"

She reluctantly let him go, and even more reluctantly agreed to get up and get dressed. It wasn't until they were both dressed up, he in his black suit and light blue dress shirt, and Rowan in her go-to meeting skirt, knee-length and black, and a light blue low-backed blouse did he realize that they had dressed to match and neither had noticed.

It occurred to him to ask her to maybe change her shirt, or just change his own, but when he looked at them together in the mirror looking like they belonged together for the first time… ever, he couldn't bring himself to do it. No matter how much he hated those couples who dressed to match.

He got Rowan in his truck and though she asked where they were going he didn't tell her. So, when they pulled up to the gates of the National Cemetery of the Pacific Rowan was suddenly unhappy.

"Oh no! No, you're gonna take me to see… but I'm not ready!"

Steve turned to her surprised. "What? But you were all sad cause I didn't go with you yesterday…"

"I know! But that was when I was mentally ready… I'm not mentally ready for this anymore!" she cried.

"Rowan… I'm taking you to a grave… you know you're not really meeting him, right?"

Rowan scowled at him. "This is a very big deal, Steven McGarrett… I need a few minutes to compose myself… and you should have told me, high heels and grass are not a comfortable mix."

Steve sighed but let her sit in silence as he parked close to where his dad's grave was. After a few moments, he deemed her ready and helped her out of the car. They walked along the rows of graves, Rowan clinging to his arm and walking slowly because her heels were getting stuck in the ground and she was teetering back and forth on the uneven grass.

She came to a full stop just two graves away.

"What if he doesn't like me…"

Steve turned to her not sure if she was joking or not. "Seriously, you know you're not really meeting him, right?"

But when she looked up at him with that defiant glare, he knew that she was serious, she was taking this all too seriously in fact.

"It may not be… really… meeting him. But it might as well be," she snapped. "And what if he like… doesn't like me and like… shows us a sign or something?"

"Like lightning flashing across a clear sky?"

"I was thinking more of the remember who you are scene with the clouds, except he'd be saying: dump that bitch!"

"I doubt my dad would call you a bitch, even in cloud form," Steve said. "Trust me, I think… I think we'll be fine."

She grumbled but otherwise didn't complain as he finally managed to bring her to the grave of his father. And then the two of them stood there, staring down at him before Steve cleared his throat, suddenly quite nervous.

"Hey dad, I uh… I know I don't usually visit this often but uh… I brought someone with me that I wanted you to meet," he said. Rowan stood beside him, her heels sinking into the group, she held onto his arm tightly and looked down at the grave at his feet. "It's the girl I told you about. Rowan."

"Hello, Sir," she said softly. "It's uhm… It's nice to meet you."

Despite her being in a black knee length skirt, and three-inch stiletto heels she knelt down in front of him.

"There that's better," she said softly. She arranged her skirt around her and then smiled down to the marble slab with his father's name inscribed across it. "I would have really liked to meet you in person," she told it as she leant forward to carefully brush the leaves away. "I'm not sure if you would have liked me right away, I'm a bit lippy and I often get in trouble, but Steve says I'm like a mold and I grow on people."

She shot him a warm smile and Steve smiled back at her, certain he was going to cry. Rowan turned back to the grave and continued to talk like his father was right there with her, like he could hear everything she was saying, just like he did. And Steve liked to think that he could.

"Uh… I'm sure you're up there, looking down so I best not lie to an angel, but uhm… I'm not from here… I know funny joke, but uh… I uh… I write songs for a living… I guess I make good money off of it, so you know… don't worry I'm not trying to leech off your son. Though he does let me stay at your place rent free… well not entirely free, I make a mean breakfast… and you know… other things," she whispered. "I probably shouldn't tell you about those things though… not very lady like."

Steve half laughed, and knelt down beside her. "She's a very good girl, dad, she likes to pretend she's not… but she is," he ensured him. "And she's treating me very, very well, even when I don't deserve it."

"Mhmmm," Rowan chimed in quickly. "I know you might be worried that I'm not good enough… well I think I might not be good enough… at least to your standards… but I'm trying. Really hard. The last thing I want to do is hurt Steve… or leave him."

They shared a look there and that emotion he felt whenever he was here with his father clogged his throat again. This last week had taught him one thing, and that was that he could never, ever let her think that he thought she wasn't good enough for him, not when it was so clearly the other way around.

"Well that's enough of the serious talk. Let's talk about the fun stuff. Did you know, that your son, took me camping, but like, Rambo style? Look at me! Do I look like a camping girl to you?"

As she continued to talk to his dad like he was right there listening to them Steve couldn't help but stare at her. The sun streamed down on her setting that profile ablaze, looking like something out of some renaissance painting, Steve wondered how he ever could have thought that his girl was a monster.