Rewrite
AvalonReeseFanFics
A/N: Happy Friday my wonderful readers! Thanks so much for being okay with me being late with the chapter. It's been a rough week. My regular laptop is in the shop until further notice and I've been working crazy hours and I just fell asleep. Right, so we've gotten to the part where it's going to be a bit confusing. This is considered the "Summer months" when the episodes aren't airing, and honestly we don't really need the episodes right now. So at the current moment we're going to be jumping back and forth between the first five episodes and episode 8. We are pretty much skipping episode two and all the case stuff in episode three (though I may add them in later) and we're going straight to episode four with a lot of episode one thrown in. Though to be honest, episode four has kinda been split up and thrown all over the place. You'll see what I mean soon enough. So yes, for those of you who are confused I've really, really messed with the time line here. Yes. Shit is going to be messed up for the next couple of chapters. If you need clarification please leave me a review and I'll try to lay a time line out for you. See you guys on Monday!
Chapter 206
Catherine rolled off of him and for a moment Steve just lay there dazed, slightly confused and feeling more than a little dirty and not in the sexy way. She smiled happily at him as she pressed kisses to the spot beside his lip and towards his jawline.
This was wrong, this was all wrong. Because the after-sex moments should have been quiet, with Rowan nestled in beside him tracing patterns down his ribs or through his chest hair. She'd know better than to try and plant kisses anywhere near his lips because that would get them started again.
It had been seventy two hours since Rowan had left him for Japan and Wo Fat. And this was all moving way too fast for him.
Catherine had been more than accommodating when he offered starting something up again. In fact as soon as he told her that he and Rowan had broken up she had gotten excited. But Steve… Steve hadn't shared the same excitement, not fully. Last night they had had dinner at his place where Catherine got to meet Nahele. He had already explained that, though Rowan was the one who took him in and it was all in her name on the paperwork, Nahele was very near and dear to Steve and they were now a package deal. Nahele had played nice at dinner though he was thoroughly confused and before he went to bed he had confided that he liked Catherine, which meant, Steve could go forward with the next part of his plan.
That wasn't supposed to include Catherine staying the night, but it had. And it had resulted in surprise morning sex. Which usually was his favourite.
Problem was all of this felt wrong. And that nausea, that had been affecting him since Rowan had left, was back hitting him in waves. It tightened is muscles, it made him react. He stiffened and Catherine thought him to be getting excited but he wasn't. It was dread that was creeping through his body, dread and anxiety. Fucking hell what was going on with him?
"I'm sorry I woke you so early," she said but he shook his head.
"That's fine, I'm glad you did," he lied.
He wanted to know how early it was, and if Nahele was in the house or at school for extra exam prep.
"Okay, go back to sleep cause I'm gonna make us some eggs," she said.
"No need, already did it for you. I'd actually prefer it if you went home," Nahele called from the doorway. Well that answered his question.
Catherine yelped tugging his white sheet more securely around herself as Nahele continued to glare at them from the doorway. Steve leant forward, craning his neck to stare at his kid and his angry face. "Buddy, I love you, but could you maybe shut the door."
Nahele rolled his eyes but did as he asked and only then did Steve lounge back in his bed. "Sorry about him… he uh… he isn't taking Ro… uh… leaving… so well… you know."
"To be honest, I'm surprised you seem to be taking it so well…"
"I told you Cath, it's done. She's gone, she's where she belongs now…" "—She belongs with an international Criminal?" "You know what I mean. She's gone to be with Wo Fat and I… you know… I get to have a second shot at the real girl I should have ended up with."
Catherine smiled proudly at him and another wave of nausea climbed up his throat. She had believed his lies, he had almost believed his own lies. She kissed him again and Steve struggled to keep his stomach from rebelling.
"As much as I'd like to stay… it uh… it kind of feels like I'm not wanted…"
Steve sighed. Goddamn it Nahele. "He just needs some time, okay? Just give him some time," Steve whispered to her and she kissed him again.
"I got some stuff to do anyway," she said. "I'll see you tonight?"
Steve nodded letting her get up and leave the bed. He found himself looking at his phone. Still nothing from Rowan. God why did that matter? No, he wasn't supposed to care.
He threw his phone away from him and got out and changed as quickly as he could. He escorted Catherine down to the door where he got to kiss her again before she finally left. From the kitchen he heard Nahele's groaning and gagging. Steve groaned in frustration but Catherine just smiled and kissed him a little longer before finally saying goodbye.
Steve closed the door and turned a dry glare onto Nahele who was just standing at the kitchen island smiling at him as if that would make up for his shitty behaviour. He couldn't help it though, it was the first big smile he had seen on Nahele's face since Rowan had left. He'd take it, even if he was flashing him a guilty grin.
"That was uncalled for you know," Steve chided because he couldn't let the kid just get away with it. Nahele winced slightly but otherwise said nothing.
"I really did make eggs," he whispered handing him his plate. Steve noted that there were two plates and not three, which meant Nahele had purposely not made enough for Catherine. Wow that would have been one hell of a message right there.
But Steve didn't want to get into that right now, not when he had a pretty big bombshell to drop on this kid. He dug into the food and pulled out of his pocket what he had purchased the day before.
"Hey I uh… I got something to show you," he said and then showed him the ring box. He opened it for him and let Nahele take that rock in.
The show girl had not been impressed with Steven when he had come to purchase the ring. Probably because he was the most apathetic engagement ring buyer she had ever met. He had picked a ring that he knew one hundred percent Rowan would have never chosen. It was a mid-range ring, no embellishments, and it still took a chunk of money out of his pocket.
"What do you think?"
Nahele looked it over and immediately brightened. "Whoa! Nice. A little plain but it'll do the trick," he said. "So when are you going to Japan to give it to her?"
He thought this was for Rowan? Steve shook his head. "No, bud… buddy… this isn't… No. This is for Catherine. You know, Catherine?"
"Who?"
"What do you mean who? Catherine? You know who Catherine is. She was just in the fucking house. You met her after the wedding, remember, we had dinner together last night. Do I need to take you to the doctor to get your head checked or are you just fucking with me?" Steve said and Nahele nodded.
"Oh, you mean that black haired chick I've never met before yesterday? Except for the morning I found her in your bed when you and mom were still together? Sorry I didn't bother to remember her name I assumed she was a one-time thing. You're really going to propose to some girl you met at a wedding just cause you're mad at mom?"
"No. NO. Catherine is my ex. I know I told you this buddy. Catherine predates Rowan. I left Catherine for Rowan…"
"And now you're going to propose to Catherine… who you left… for Rowan… three days after Rowan left you… man if she says yes Catherine has some issues. No one told me your rebound game was this whack, McGarrett."
"Nahele… stop… come on. I told you, we talked about this. Rowan is gone. Catherine… Catherine will be better for both of us."
"That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."
"What? Why? You said you liked Catherine."
"No, I said she was nice. And I don't know if you can tell from this morning, but I was LYING. I don't know Catherine…"
"Exactly, give her a chance…"
"Give her a chance? What? No. DAD!" Nahele cried. The fact that he said it without a slip up was surprising and he seemed to not have noticed it because he just forged forward. "Please, this is ridiculous. I get it, you're mad at Ro, but proposing to Catherine isn't going to make you feel better okay? Just… just go to Japan, please! Go bring her home… I bet she's just waiting for you."
"Okay… you need to… you need to let this go," Steve said and Nahele's hopeful face fell. "Buddy… Rowan left us, okay?"
"No, she left you!" Nahele shouted suddenly and Steve cringed. "I heard your argument! She's going to send people to get me!"
"Yeah, first thing you gotta learn about Rowan Pierce, buddy, is that Rowan Pierce lies," he told him, despite the tears that were falling down his kid's face. "When was the last time you heard from her, huh?"
"She'll… she'll probably call when she's settled! She's probably afraid you'll listen in or something…"
"Kid, if she were coming back for you she would have called by now, okay?" Steve cried. He didn't want to be cruel but he had to. "Now I'm sorry, and that sucks, I get it, but right now I'm all you've got, so stop fighting me on this and just go with it okay? Because I'm proposing to Catherine and I will marry her, you got me!"
"I don't care what you do!" Nahele snapped grabbing up all his books and shoving them into his bag. "I don't want to stay with you and your stupid rebound girl. I'd rather go to a group home than stay with you and your stupid… slutty second choice!"
"NAHELE!" Steve cried watching as he stormed away and towards the steps. He did nothing to chase him and the boy said nothing else to him. But a few moments later he heard the slam of a door and knew that the kid had gone to his room.
Sighing Steve put his head to his hands, his fingers running through his hair. Goddamn it. How had everything gone so wrong in such a short amount of time?
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
Danny knew his boy was hurting. He could see it in the stiffness in Steve's shoulders, in the crinkles around his eyes, in the sharp inhales and the way his fingers would tighten around the steering wheel. Steve was an emotional wreck and Danny got that, because Steve was always an emotional wreck when Rowan did one of her runners. Granted she had never run off the actual island before, but this fight had been a bad one.
They had broken up.
None of the Five-0's thought it was a permanent break up but it totally would be if Rowan found out what was going on with Catherine. Steve had gotten it into his head less than 12 hours after finding out that Rowan was in Japan that in order to help Nahele, stressing that this was not to help himself as Steve was fine, that Steve needed to immediately move on. And that meant starting something with Catherine. Which was the stupidest thing he had ever heard but Steven couldn't be talked out of it.
Danny glanced to Steve again. The poor man looked crushed. God what Rowan had done to him? "So uh… how are you doing?"
"Good… good… uh… kid met Catherine properly last night… it uh… I unno… I thought it went well," Steve said. "He kind of flipped on me this morning."
"Well I mean, Rowan's been gone… what… three days now? I bet he can't be happy you've got another girl encroaching on her territory."
"Yeah I unno, he was fine when it was just me and her dating, sort of, but the real freak out happened when I said I was gonna marry Catherine," Steve admitted. "I know he's going through a lot but the quicker I get him over Rowan the easier it'll be for all of us…"
"Whoa… wait a second, say that last part again."
"What, that I need to get Nahele over Rowan? You're not gonna say something stupid like I'm actually trying to make me get over Rowan, right? Cause that's ridiculous."
That was exactly what Steve was doing but it wasn't what Danny meant. "No I mean the other thing. The thing about Catherine.
"I said I'm going to ask Catherine to marry me."
Well fuck. That… now that didn't make sense. Not when three days ago Steve had showed up at his door step sobbing about Rowan and him breaking up, leaving him to go to Japan to be with Wo Fat. Now he was going to propose to a completely different girl? What the hell was he? An emotional boomerang?
Danny must have been silent for too long because Steve asked: "What? Nothing? The man who has a smart remark for everything has nothing for this right now?"
"No… this is good. I can see it now. You and Catherine in matching camouflage cargo-pants on some very exotic shooting range and you get down on one knee, saying: Babe I want you to join my unit for a lifelong mission," Danny said and Steve smiled. "Only problem is we both know that you should be marrying Rowan. That you would rather be marrying Rowan. So honestly, I can kinda get why the kid is pissed at you."
And there was that scowl. Steve must have thought that Danny was going to agree with him. The nujob. He sighed and pointedly kept his eyes on the road ahead of him. "Rowan left me Danny."
"So what? Go get her."
"She picked Wo Fat. She threw my promise ring back at me…"
"You threatened to marry Catherine when you know what she's like with your threats. She has always called your bluff. Do you know what's going to happen when she finds out? Steve, if she finds out you're actually taking steps to actually propose to Catherine she'll never forgive you and definitely won't come back. And then what? You're gonna marry the wrong girl, Rowan's gonna… I unno become queen criminal? Do we really want her to get anymore sociopathic cause you know that'll happen if she stays with him…"
"I don't care. I don't care what she does, or what happens to her. She wants to be a career criminal like her precious brother, let her. I'll take her down when I have to. And I certainly don't want her to come back."
"Kay… all of that… all of that nothing more than a pack of lies and you know it."
"Shut up Danny. Shut up."
Danny watched Steve squirm in his seat a strange look crossing over his face. It was enough for Danny to realize that Steven wasn't comfortable with doing this either. The only thing keeping him going at that point was rage. And boy, when that wore off, was he going to regret everything he done while he was angry.
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
They ended up having to chase their arsonist up to Lua'alaea Falls where they thought he had escaped with Duclair and was hiding out until further notice. That meant, Steve, Danny, Chin and Grover were all trekking through the jungle with Steve at the lead with a machete loving every minute of this.
You know who'd be bitching if they had to do this? Rowan. But Catherine wouldn't be. Damn why did he think that Rowan would fit into his life when Catherine was clearly better suited.
Oh yeah? If Catherine is so better suited why did you miss Rowan so much, huh?
Fuck his mind. No. He was not going to change his mind again. Rowan had left him. Rowan had left him for Wo Fat.
"I'm just gonna keep it real, man. If these perps are up here, I'm gonna be way too damn tired to arrest them," Grover said.
"We could just shoot the guy when we get there," Danny offered. "Yeah Steve, you're good with that, right?"
The group came to a halt again, Steve did it for several reasons. For starters he could tell his friends were tired so he was going to give them a chance to rest, secondly a wave of nausea came over him again, this roiling pit of nervousness that took the wind right out of him and had him worrying that he might actually vomit here on this trail. Instead he covered it up with pretending to check the coordinates to make sure they were on the right track.
As they all stopped to catch their breaths, drink their water, and in Steve's case to force himself not to throw up, Chin asked: "Anybody got any buy spray? I'm getting eaten alive out here."
Danny suddenly straightened. "Okay, I can't keep it a secret anymore. Steve has something that he would like to share with everybody, with the group," he announced.
"I hope it's bug spray," Chin muttered. But Steve knew it wasn't that. Fuck he never should have told Danny. He didn't want the other to know what he was doing because, like Danny, they'd see right through this. Though a part of him wanted them to know, wanted this to get back to Rowan, because then maybe… if she knew what he was doing… she'd come back.
But despite Steve half-heartedly trying to stop him, Danny did it anyway.
"He's getting married," Danny told them. "He's going to propose to Catherine."
For a minute Chin and Grover were silent. Just like Steve figured they'd be. "I'm sorry I think I misheard you… did you say Catherine?" Chin asked.
Grover frowned and shook his head. "I know you can't have said Catherine cause three days ago you were dating Rowan and we all know how crazy you are about that girl…"
"No, Catherine. He said Catherine, I meant Catherine. I'm going to propose to Catherine."
They all exchanged glanced again. "Uh… are you sure that's a good idea?" Chin asked. "What happens if Catherine says yes and Rowan comes back?"
"If Rowan comes back to this island, she's getting arrested."
"No. she's not," Danny said. "No one will agree to that. She hasn't done anything wrong. Breaking up with you in not a crime."
"She's not coming back. And if she does it'll be for Nahele. And I don't care if she does, I've made my choice, now haven't I?"
Steve would have been crazy not to notice that Chin was texting. He didn't need three guesses as to who Chin was texting so quickly. "Why are you texting Kono?"
"I'm not texting Kono."
"I'm not stupid. There's no point in texting Kono to warn Rowan. Rowan picked Wo Fat, I picked Catherine. Let it go. Okay? Let it go."
And while they did, Steve knew, he knew they were right. And he was sort of hoping that maybe Kono did warn Rowan. And that terrible niggling feeling in the pit of his stomach continued to gnaw away at him for the rest of the hike.
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
Catherine was surprised when Danny called her out of the blue to ask her to meet. It had raised a few flags but she had gone to do just that. Meet him at the crest of the highway just above the ocean. Catherine had got to the meet place before Danny which meant she had time to think about what had been going on with her.
It had been a rough morning, Steve had introduced him to his foster kid and Nahuka, or whatever his name was, had not liked her. He was Rowan's kid and she could tell, he had the same angry glare and he was fiercely protective of Steve and the ohana they had made together. She had tried not to be bitter, but she was realizing there would be no, falling into place with Steve, even if Rowan was gone, that kid wasn't going to let it be easy. He didn't want her there, and she didn't want to live in Rowan's shadow, being second best to her to both that kid and Steven.
Danny's Camaro came into view and parked next to hers. In a few seconds he was out and smiling in that strained way of his, like he did when he was nervous or about to argue with Steven. "Hey!"
"Hey, Danny," she said cheerfully though she had a feeling Danny was going to say some shit.
"Thanks for coming out to meet me."
"No problem," she assured him as they hugged. "Is everything alright?"
"Yeah everything's good. I just thought we should have a conversation," Danny told her and that's when she knew that her theory was correct.
"Okay," she said suspiciously.
"So, uh… nice view," he said quickly and she shook her head, at least she knew he was nervous about it.
"Oh, come on, bring it. Just bring it."
"Okay… well… Steve has been very happy since you've been back," he told her.
Awww that's wonderful. "Me too," she said.
"And you know you came at a really good time, because as you know, Rowan's gone." Ah here it was, he was going to tell her to back off. Well no, Rowan had fucked up and it was her time to get what was hers. What had been hers all along. "And you're here and you're capitalizing on that. Catherine I like you but that boy is hurting, he is hurting bad and he's using you as a band aid to cover it up, you feel me?"
Catherine nodded. "She left him, Danny. And both Steve and I… we have unresolved feelings that we both what to explore…"
"Yeah I got that excuse from him too," he said. "Look, right now, right now you're what's keeping him afloat. You're keeping him happy… so don't leave again."
Catherine cleared her throat, damn they couldn't possibly know already. "Where did that come from? Does Steve know that you're here right now?"
"No he does not and he would kill me if he did so please don't tell him," Danny told her quickly. "Look, Catherine, I'm just looking out for my boy, alright and honestly he's a disaster. Maybe you don't see it, maybe you think this is all some second chance and he's seen the light but you weren't here. You haven't seen them together and I know… I know you don't walk away from the kind of relationship the two of them had."
"But she left. Not the other way around. She chose Wo Fat… she chose to leave…" she reminded him.
"Is that what he told you? Just that… she chose to leave? He didn't mention anything else?" Danny asked. When she shook her head he added: "Seriously nothing about an ultimatum?"
"He told me he gave her the option to drop Wo Fat or they were over. She chose to be over," she said with a shrug.
Danny took that in with a simple huh which got her curious nature humming. Steve was hiding something then, and Danny knew what it was. Well he obviously wasn't going to tell her because he moved away from the conversation. "Look, the last couple of years, he's been through a lot especially when it came down to dealing with Rowan, the girl really put him on an emotional rollercoaster and I… I just think he deserves to be happy… both of you do. I just… honestly… I don't want either of you to get super invested into what is most likely a rebound only for it to implode, okay? And I definitely don't want you leaving him and crushing him all over again."
Catherine took that in. So, Danny thought that Rowan still had a hold on Steve, but Catherine must have had some sort of hold too if he was worried that her leaving again would hurt Steve. Or did he just want Catherine to stay as a crutch because he could tell that Steve just could not handle losing both her and Rowan at the same time.
"So that's what I wanted to say," Danny summed up. "I honestly have nothing against you. I personally think that Steve is more calm and level headed when you're around, so you know… rooting for you."
Catherine looked at him as he squinted out at the light reflecting on the ocean view beneath them. She knew he was lying. Danny was expecting Rowan to come back. He was expecting her to come back and Catherine would be gone. She dare say that he was looking forward to it.
But she couldn't say anything so all she did was tell him there were still good, thank him for the warning, hug him and then get into the car.
What was she going to do?
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
After dealing with briefcase bombs and arsonists and having to put Jason Duclair back into fucking jail after he broke out, killed the copy cat he was training and then burned the corpse. After all of that, all Steve wanted to do was curl up with Rowan and…. No… no… no he wanted to curl up with Catherine and listen to her play… Catherine didn't play guitar… for fuck sake. He could do this. He could do this.
He didn't miss Rowan. He didn't.
It had been nice working a case with Catherine. Would have been nicer if he could have exercised the Sandy network to deal with his bad guys this time around, or had Rowan's help with the situation or her visions to put him onto a good lead. He was told he got a little… violent and aggressive with the people he was interrogating, and chasing. And he couldn't really be dependent on the word of psychic, and that app of hers had been an excuse to use the criminal world for his benefit. He kept telling himself that he was better off without both but it still felt like he was lying to himself a bit.
They had gotten Duclair back into prison, though he had given himself up to get medical attention. Duclair had taken out Trout himself, which was fair cause Trout had helped break Duclair out of prison simply to take Duclair out himself. For Fame. Which was stupid. But hey he got his two guys back.
He was going home to Catherine, to Nahele, to the remnants of a family he wanted more than anything and was desperately trying to put back together by any means necessary. A family he knew wasn't going to be the same unless Rowan came back. A family that he planned to make a family again by proposing to Catherine, probably tonight. He had the ring in his pocket, he had a basic idea of how he was going to do it and everything. He should have felt something other than nauseating nervousness.
He pulled up to his house and found Catherine waiting out on the porch. He could think of two reasons that she'd be outside and that's either Rowan had come back and kicked her out, or Nahele had done something.
A wave of nausea hit him again and he frowned. Kay not Rowan, judging by the feeling in his stomach. What had Nahele done? He hopped out of his truck and his phone went off in his pocket. It was a number he didn't recognize but he answered with his typical: "McGarrett."
"McGarrett…" that was Wo Fat's voice. "It's an emerg…."
But Steve cut him off with a sharp: "Fuck you." And then hung up the phone.
Almost immediately he regretted it. With that nervousness was now coiled in his stomach. He hadn't been able to eat much for the last few days and looking at what he was about to do it made sense. But what if something was really wrong… what else would Wo Fat call him for?
Steve shrugged it all aside. Rowan and her void shit could go to hell. If she was in trouble, Wo Fat could deal with it, he dealt with it all the other times, right?
Putting his phone back in his pocket, and steeling himself for whatever it was Nahele did and getting ready to apologize for the stunt, he headed towards Catherine. Which was when he noticed that her packed bags were sitting beside her. Son of a bitch she was leaving. What the hell had Nahele done?
He got closer to her and he must have been wearing a face because as soon as he got close enough she looked up at him with her weepy brown eyes, that did absolutely nothing for him and her chin started to wobble. "I'm sorry," she said to him and Steve winced.
"Is it… is it cause of Nahele? Cause you know… he'll come around sooner or later…"
Catherine shook her head. "Steve… no…"
"Cath… you just got here."
"Look, Steve, it's not that I don't love you…I do… but I have to go away for a little bit."
Not again. No. Why did everyone he cared about leave him? WHY? He crossed his arms over his chest as if to bar his heart from anymore injury and stared down at her: "How long."
She was quiet for a moment as she thought it over. "The truth is, I don't really know." Okay so that meant indefinitely. She was going away for a very long time. Just like his mother, just like Rowan. He continued to stare down at her, and she began to tear up. "God this is so hard."
Hard for her? She wasn't the one getting dumped twice in a fucking row.
"I need more than what a relationship can give me right now," she told him.
Steve nodded. Okay fair. "Okay. What do you want?'
"To feel needed."
"You are," he answered immediately even though he wasn't sure if he needed her for the right reasons, he just knew that all of this would be for nothing if she went away. Loosing Rowan, buying that ring, all of it would be meaningless because he had made the wrong choice. And that couldn't be true. He really needed that not to be true.
"No, not like that," she clarified and those words dealt another blow, because it was another woman telling him that his feelings for them weren't enough. Why the hell was he never enough? "See, when your phone rings, someone needs you. Okay… and you can help them. And I want to feel that."
"So, come back to Five-0," Steve offered but that too was shot out of the sky.
"No. Steve, Five-0 is you. It's always gonna be your thing, okay? Okay I need to build something on my own."
Steve took that in and then sat down beside her with a heavy sigh. "So you're going back to Afghanistan."
"No. Nepal. That earthquake hit them hard. I'm going to be running helidrops for the Red Cross. Getting those supplies to people who need it most is where I can… I can make a difference."
"Alright, well, that's a two month op at most," he told her, tried to reason with her.
"Could be more."
"You know Catherine, if you want out of this thing, why don't you just look me in the eye and tell me you want out of this thing?"
"Steve I don't even know what this thing is," she told him. "And Rowan… she just did that to you I didn't want to do it do you again."
But she was. She was doing it to him again. Same situation, different woman.
"That doesn't mean I didn't want this. A second chance with you. Especially since I've always felt like… if Rowan had never shown up we would have never had problems… I would have never lost you. But I… if I could be in two places at the same time, I would."
"Yeah, but you can't, Catherine. And you're choosing the place where I'm not," he snapped. The silent just like Rowan was implied and he was sure she caught it. "I mean… Listen, if you leave today, I can't… I won't wait for you…" he said to her.
Catherine nodded. "That's okay, Steven, I understand," she said. She slowly got up, a SUV pulling up behind his truck, clearly her ride. Steve stood with her, letting her hug him. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed softly in his ear like this made it better. "I will always… always love you, okay? But… I think we both know that you already are waiting for someone… it just isn't me."
Steve let that sink in, he dropped his hold on her and stepped back. But he didn't collapse to the steps of his porch until that SUV had driven away. He was in shock, he couldn't believe that this had happened again. He should have been crushed, devastated or upset by this turn of events, but that wasn't the feeling sitting in his chest.
Because as he sat there, with Catherine walking away from him, that ring box in his hand. All Steven felt was relief.
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
When Nahele came back from school Steve was sitting on the couch. Catherine was officially gone and he had done nothing but think about this turn of events. Like how, for starters, he knew now just how fucked up what he had done was. He seriously started some kind of rebound relationship with Catherine simply to spite Rowan and then he went a bought a ring for the wrong girl. Why? Again, to spite Rowan. And maybe a little bit because he figured if Rowan heard what he was doing she'd come back.
But that wasn't what was going to happen. Rowan would hear about Catherine and the proposal and she'd never come back. She'd never forgive Steve for doing that. He had fucked his chances of getting his girl back all because he was mad at her.
Over Wo Fat.
Okay yeah, the man had done some terrible things, yeah he had tortured Steve twice and he gave Rowan the ability to be just as dangerously psycho as him, but he had come through in protecting and saving Rowan more times than he could count. And you know… Rowan had always been pretty good at keeping them separate. Except for the few times where they had no choice, Steve didn't have to deal with Wo Fat.
And to be honest, it was kind of nice when he and Wo Fat cooperated. He felt like, if anyone could understand the frustration Rowan put him through, it was Wo Fat, but he had never tried to talk to him about it before. And if he ever convinced Rowan to come back, maybe he'd start. But probably not.
Steve also knew that Nahele was reeling over Rowan's abandonment. He and Rowan had always been close so this must have been jarring to him, for her to just out of nowhere leave the island and drop all contact with him. And then Steve just up and tried to replace her with his ex and figured the kid would be fine with it. Not his smartest move.
So when Nahele came through the door and didn't hit him with an immediately hello he figured he deserved it. Nahele dropped his bag by the door and shuffled into the kitchen. Steve figured he'd give him his space and when the kid calmed down a bit, he'd apologize, take him out to a movie or something. He figured the kid probably wouldn't talk to him for a few days which was going to make living together kinda awkward.
But Nahele surprised him.
"Hey uh… dad… I mean Steve?"
Steve looked up to find Nahele standing above him a trembling look about his features. "Hey… hey buddy what's up?"
Nahele looked down quickly before mumbling out: "I'm really sorry I said I'd rather go to a group home than live with you… It's just… mom left me and she hasn't called and this new woman… I just… I wanted my family back…"
"Hey, hey, hey," Steve said as the kid broke out into tears. He grabbed Nahele quickly, pulling him down the couch and into a strong hug from him. "Hey it's okay, I got it okay? I knew… I knew it was because you were hurting and I was pushing some ridiculous plan onto you. I never should have put you in that position, especially since you were right…"
"So you didn't propose?" Nahele asked with a sniff.
Steve shook his head. "No… no… turns out she was leaving too… so you know… got dumped twice in three days… does not feel good let me tell you…"
"I'm sorry…"
"Hey it's okay, it's fine, I'm used to it by now…" Steve said. "But how about you? How are you holding up?"
"I unno… I just didn't think she'd just leave… you know… not without calling me… I really thought she… she'd have come to get me by now… but she really did just leave us both behind… I thought she cared for me…"
Steve nodded. "That uh… that may not have been what she did. She does care, you know?" he said which got him a huff from Nahele and a yeah it sure looks like it. Steve sighed this was his fault. Steve was used to Rowan's runners, Nahele was not. "What I should have told you when she vanished was that she does this."
"Does what?"
"Runs," Steve said. "It's something she does when she's upset, she's done it before and usually I go off and find her but she's never left the island before. Granted I'm not even sure how she did cause she doesn't have a passport but I guess her brother got her out…"
"I didn't know she had a brother…"
"Wo Fat is not her brother," he said. "It's complicated. Just uh… yeah, it's complicated. Look, this vanishing act she does, it's just cause she's hurting. It's how she deals with it, and when she feels better she'll come back. I promise."
"Or you know… you could go get her," Nahele said.
"I unno buddy, I said some things I shouldn't have… and you know… I'm sure Kono's told her all about this dalliance with Catherine… she doesn't think rationally where Catherine is involved, I just don't think she'll forgive me."
"I think, the only reason she hasn't come back yet is because you were with Catherine. I bet she thinks you don't want her, but if you go to Japan to go get her she'll know for sure. Just you know, don't kidnap her, just surprise her with flowers or chocolates or something."
"I'd have to find her first," he said.
"Just track her phone," he said with a shrug. "But seriously just make sure she comes home. I miss her."
Yeah he missed Rowan too. He let Nahele hug him again, let the boy go back to his room to study and then sat back wondering what he was going to do now. It wasn't long after that that he pulled out his phone to call her.
"Hey," he said, thinking to himself that it was rather odd that it went straight to her voicemail. "Hey… it's Steven… obviously. I… I fucked up Rowan. I know I should say this to you in person but uh… I love you, okay? I love you and I want you to come home. So if you could call me… so we can talk this out and figure out a way for us to fix this… I'd really like that. Just… please… Ro… I need you."
He hung up and then just sat there for a bit. The nausea rolling through him as Steven began to wait.