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AvalonReeseFanFics
A/N: Are you guys ready for more confessions my wonderful readers? Because this chapter is full of them! I literally went for rom-com in this chapter so I really hope you guys enjoy this one! Like a pretty big event is going to happen in this chapter. Anyway, don't forget to leave a review, I'd love to hear what you guys think of this one and I'll see you guys Friday!
Chapter 312
Rowan took Angus to the La Mariana Tiki bar because she was craving greasy food and MacGyver said he needed some place where they might have a dancefloor. And while La Marianna didn't have a designated place to dance she knew that if she asked, Nick would let her make a space.
She got to order her greasy food and Angus ordered them drinks, a slushie just like she liked. They had made small talk in the car ride over, about how Hawaii seemed to suit her and how she seemed much better. He meant how the sun had tanned her, and the breeze windswept her hair the right way, and how she looked in her pastel purple GTO. But what really suited her, what had really changed was her heart. She had Steven back and because of him her broken heart had healed. That was the change in her that he saw.
But she didn't want to tell him that, not until she knew what he was there for because the way he kept looking at her told her that there was some sort of ulterior motive. Possibly a romantic one, even if that made no sense to her.
They kept up with the small talk all the way until her food came and then he pulled out a CD one she recognized because she had left it for him.
"I listen to it all the time," he said. "It's my favourite song."
Rowan half smiled. "I'm glad you like it."
"I… uh brought it for a reason, actually." "—Is that so?" "Yes, you see, I promised you a dance in one of Hollywood's swankiest clubs but we never got there. I know this isn't the swanky joint I promised but would you maybe… like to dance?"
Rowan's eyes narrowed as she wondered whether or not dancing with another man constituted as cheating. She figured if she had no romantic intentions with the man then probably not, it was whether or not Steve would see it that way. Then she remembered the kind of espionage stuff that Steve did for the "good of the people" and to "catch the bad guy" and she figured if she had one dance with him now there would be one time in the future where Steve could pull this card and get away with some flirtatious undertones for his case. Sort of like a banked Get-Out-Of-Argument-Free card.
Rowan took the CD he offered and ran over to Nick to tell him of her plan. He okayed the dance tune and the dance floor and while she and Angus moved the chairs out of the way he cued up the song to play. Once the song started playing and they had enough room they began to dance.
My Oh My was a lively tune and Rowan was enjoying sashaying her hips around. She got a few twirls in to show off the skirt of her new summer dress when Angus suddenly grabbed her hips and tugged her to him.
Rowan immediately put her hands out to keep her body from colliding with his. She maintained a respectful, middle-grade-school-dance space between them, as they essentially slow danced. Which made no sense because this was an upbeat tempo.
"Are you happy Rowan?" he asked and her eyes narrowed once more. "You could tell me you know. If he… he's making you stay here…"
Making her stay? What the hell? "No! I'm happy, of course I'm happy. I chose to come back…"
"But we heard there was all this cloak and dagger stuff… that he had to like… corner you and chase you down…"
"Oh that was a test," Rowan said quickly. "To see if he'd pick me or arrest Wo. And he picked getting me back. That meant he still wanted me and… did I tell you Wo lied about… everything?"
She hadn't but obviously that was clear. "So, he wasn't married then?"
"Nope, just something Wo Fat made up so I'd stop asking questions." There was more to it of course but she didn't want to bore Angus with that.
"That's a shame," he whispered, managed to pull her closer to him despite her attempting to keep a distance.
"And why is that," she said trying to twist to avoid the head that was coming down.
"It's a shame because we could have really had something… you know?"
No, no she didn't know. They had an entirely fake relationship. He didn't know her real name, where she was real from or who her family was. He didn't know about the powers, or the alternate reality or that she was independently wealthy. She figured, since her finances never came up, that he assumed she was supported by her brother and his crimes.
"Angus what are you talking about?"
But he didn't get to answer though, suddenly he was ripped away from her and practically thrown across the room. Angus bowled over a small table and Steve might have done more if she hadn't pounced on him.
"Steve, stop, stop!" she cried while he tried desperately to shrug her off of him. He was practically vibrating with anger, has face red, a death glare coloring his features.
"I'll kill him, I'll fucking kill him," he kept growling, she had to forcibly clap her hands to his cheeks and force him to look at her. She realized then that yeah, Steve probably figured her cheating. She could see the hurt flashing in his eyes.
Angus must have gotten up because suddenly his eyes were on something behind her. She had no idea what happened but his face contorted and she immediately began to push him away before he lost his mind.
"For god sake, Steven, will you calm down?" she asked still trying to herd him away from Angus. "Steven stop, you're being ridiculous."
"Ridiculous? Tell her why you're here, go on! Tell her you're here to win her back."
"That's not true!"
"Actually, it is," Angus said. Rowan turned hissed out a: For the love of god, now is not the time. But he still looked Steven in the eye and said: "I think her and I were good together. We could really work things out you know? I think… I think I'd be the better fit."
Steve practically bowled her over trying to get at him and Rowan practically jumped on Steven's back to get him off of Angus.
"Calm down," she ordered, her voice soft, her eyes pleading with him.
She almost got to him, expect she was tugged out of Steve's grasp and to someone else's side. The animalistic growl on his face usually scared people but Angus wasn't regular people.
"Is that what you do?" he said indicating to Steve's face. "Is that how you keep her here?"
"Keep?" Steve echoed, he put a hand out that Rowan took immediately. With one tug she was against his chest, one of his arms keeping her securely there. "Look. I don't know what you think or what you thought…"
"Maybe I thought she needed rescuing from you."
Steve paused. He looked down to Rowan and then back to Angus, clearly not understanding. "Me? I'm her boyfriend?!"
"Are you though?"
"Yes, and she has the promise ring to prove it."
Angus turned to Rowan who very happily showed him the ring. "He did give me the promise ring back."
"See! So, there you go. No need for rescuing. You can go now."
"Are you sure? You sure you didn't Stockholm her into this?"
"How dare you?!" Steve thundered.
"Really? Because literally a few months ago she was running from you…" "—Actually it turns out I was being lied to." "… and there's a whole file about how you used to arrest her for things that weren't crimes." "—Okay yea that was fucked up but we moved past that years ago." "…and then we called you and asked what you wanted… you said all you wanted was to arrest her!"
Rowan pushed herself out of Steven's grasp and went to stand beside Angus. She crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes at him. "Actually yeah. Explain that. What was going on with that? Why did you do that to me?"
Steve turned his eyes from Angus to Rowan, clearly not happy with where things had gone. "Because I didn't have a choice!" he cried and the two of them actually jumped a bit and moved away. "Your No Fly was taken down and after my birthday and that call, I wanted to find you to figure out why you thought I told you not to come back when I clearly didn't. And… Dennings wouldn't let me."
Rowan blinked her eyes surprised. "What? Why?"
"Because he saw it as a misuse of my immunity and means, because we broke up and I was trying to find you," he said with frown. "He called me off Rowan. He said unless I had a valid legal reason for looking for you, he wasn't going to let me renew the No Fly Ban. So I lied, Rowan. I did what I had to to get you back, to get any sort of information on your whereabouts."
For second they all stared at one another. Poor Steve, his chest was heaving staring them down and Rowan kind of felt bad. The man had issues with letting her go, worried about losing her to Wo Fat again, and he now he was face to face with one of her exes from the year away. He was clearly having a panic attack about it, especially since they seemed to be ganging up on him.
"And I'll have you know that your precious Mackie had Jack call me to ask all about you. So they knew that I was looking for you…"
"Uh… no… you said you wanted her to arrest Wo Fat."
"I had to say that!" Steve cried.
"And the demand to take her the nearest Naval base?"
"She's a goddamn runner and Wo Fat was lethal about keeping her away from me. I figured the Naval base the safest place to keep her until I could get there."
Angus nodded and then shot a glance to Rowan who was now standing between them, but to the side, just out of way in case. She was ready to move in between them if one of them decided to charge the other.
"Okay. Fair… and what about all the stories she told me. Like drugging her and taking her to Japan? About how you never liked her for herself and you kept trying to change her? How about how you spent more than six months fighting on giving her a label she deserved?"
Steve turned wounded eyes to her and she winced. "I uh… I might have moaned about our relationship to uhm… a few people."
Steven huffed but said nothing so Angus turned to her. "Look. I know this is coming out of nowhere, but I've missed you. I've spent the last two months struggling to find you just to make things right. I know you're not the Rory I got to know, I know that there were things you didn't tell me for a reason, but everything I love about you is what makes you, you. Like I love how intimidating you are, and how resourceful you are. And I won't ever ask you to pick between you and your brother and you won't have to hide anything from me ever again. I promise. I just… I just want a chance."
Rowan just stared at him. Dear god. He came all the way here to win her back and he was going to do it… in front of Steve?
She glanced to Steve and saw nothing short of anguish on his face.
"I just… I think he's not good for you. He's stifles you and controls you and you're not happy with that…"
"But I am happy…"
"Are you? Are you telling me there isn't a single problem between you and him right now?"
Rowan shot a glance to Steven again. They were having problems. He still didn't listen to her visions, he wanted Wo out of her life unless he wanted something from Wo. And of course he didn't like the new her, which wasn't really new but the real her. And it hurt to hear that the person she really was, was once again not wanted.
Her hesitation was enough. Angus took a hold of her shoulders. "See, you haven't even been back that long. If he really cared about you, do you really think you'd be having problems so soon after getting you back? He clearly doesn't appreciate you…"
Maybe that was true, but Rowan didn't want to talk about this in front of Steve when she should have been talking to him about it.
Rowan's hands went to Angus' shoulders and she smiled up to him. "What's going on with Steven is between he and I. You don't need to worry about it. And while I appreciate all that you said… I'm afraid I don't quite feel the same way."
Angus let out a string of wry chuckles and looked down so Rowan reached up to cup his cheek. "The time I spent with you was irreplaceable. And it was everything I needed at that time. And though I did like you, Mackie, and I did, truly, I was honestly just using you to fill a void." Angus nodded and she added: "Though, when it started, I honestly thought that you could have cured my broken heart. It's why I stayed in the first place."
"But I couldn't, huh?"
"Sorry. Turns out I was deluding myself. But at least we figured it out, right?" he smiled kindly at her and she smiled back so she went about straightening up his shirt like she used to do for him when they lived together. "You're a sweet handsome boy, and you will find someone else, someone who really truly loves you. Might I suggest you start with Nikki, I got a lot of hostility from her for no reason, I wouldn't be surprised if it was because she was jealous."
"Nikki? Carpenter? That Nikki?"
"Just a suggestion, I might be wrong," she said with a shrug. She then stepped back, dropping both her hands and his. "Are we good?"
He nodded and she smiled triumphantly. She then turned back Steve who had been watching the by-play intently. "I think we should talk, do you have some time to spare?"
By the way Steve's face fell you would have thought she asked him to break up then and there. But he nodded his head.
Angus apologized for the awkwardness he might have caused, retrieved his CD and then left them there, where Rowan ushered Steven to the table she and Angus had been at which luckily had not been anywhere near the table that Steven had thrown Angus into.
She didn't know how this was going to go but she had a feeling this might be their biggest argument yet.
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
He spent the whole drive over to La Mariana with nothing but terrible thoughts in his head. Of Angus romancing Rowan, of him laying out all of Steven's flaws, of him asking her to leave him. Worst case scenario, she agreed and left him. Nightmare scenario, he pulled a Wo Fat and just took her. He didn't think he would, because he was like Steve but one of Steve's nightmares was potentially unfolding in front of him and he could no longer see reason.
So when he walked into La Mariana to the two of them dancing he might have lost his mind.
And now, after Angus MacGyver had laid everything out, put Steve's flaws to shame, and admitted to her that he was there for Rowan, and he would be infinitely better than Steve ever could be, she wanted to talk.
He sat down across from her and for a moment they just sat there staring at one another.
"You uh… you wanna tell me why you accosted him like that?"
Really? She couldn't deduce why he'd fucking attack a man that was trying to win her back and away from him?
"I unno, I guess cause I came in here to find the two of you dancing looking like you were about to make out and you're supposed to be… dating me. So…"
"You threw him?"
"I might have tossed him a little too hard, but I wasn't trying… I just wanted him away from you."
Rowan nodded. "I understand."
"Do you?" he asked his voice bitter. "Imagine walking in to me and Catherine like that? How mad would you be?"
"Pretty mad."
"And why didn't you tell me he was your ex?"
"Because I wanted to go to lunch with him. And if I told you he was my Cali guy you would have nixed that immediately."
Yes, yes he would have. She would not have left with him at all.
"I simply wanted a chance to talk to him away from you. Mostly because we weren't at that part of the story and he was a very important part of it…"
"The man you almost stayed with," Steve whispered. Echoing what Wo Fat had told him. "He… he's right. We're having problems and you were going to leave me for him…"
"What? Steven! How could you think that?" Because Angus MacGyver had been right. He mistreated her, then and he was doing it again now. He still didn't deserve her and he swore if he ever got her back he would change. "Steven he got me arrested any relationship we could have possibly had ended there. Not to mention I hadn't even told him my real name, he knew nothing about me that was true, what kind of relationship could we have had?"
Okay maybe that was true, but he knew who she was now and he wanted her. Seeing as how bad Steven had been behaving he would have thought an understanding boyfriend who listened to her would have at least been tempting.
Rowan took in his look and shook her head.
"Do you know how easy it was to get over him? The boys took me to a concert, had me crash it, and I stopped thinking about him after that. Do you know why?" He had a feeling he knew but he was going to leave it up to her to enlighten him. "Because I saw you. I saw you and you tried to stop me from leaving and I remembered that I missed you and wanted you and… well… Mackie became a thing of the past."
Despite himself Steven laughed. So that was why they brought her to Hawaii. She was sad about the break up so they had her crash that concert. Well that made sense, and it definitely stroked his ego to hear that all she needed to get over MacGuyver was to see him.
"That was it, huh?" he said. Rowan nodded. She reached out and took his hand. "It didn't matter where I went or who I was with, I always wanted you."
Steve clung to her hand his heart swelling because it had been the same for him too. No matter what happened, what Wo Fat said, or who he went out with, he always wanted Rowan to come back to him.
"He was right, Rowan, we do have problems," he told her and she nodded she opened her mouth and Steve knew exactly what she was going to say. That she would work on being better, but it wasn't her that needed to work. "And it's all my fault."
Rowan's open mouth dropped, she hadn't been expecting that clearly. "You know… while we were apart I had a long time to think about how everything went wrong and it… it all came back to me."
"You? Now Steven… I wasn't that helpful…"
Steve shook his head. "No, no, you did everything. Everything to make us work. And I… I ruined us. I was always so mad at you for keeping me out of the loop, for lying to me, but you had to. You had to because I never responded to a single thing you did positively. So, you hid things so we wouldn't fight. And I hated Wo Fat and that app, but I needed them. I needed them to take care of you and to keep me and the team safe. Everything we fought about… it was my fault. If I had just listened to you and supported you and let you talk to your brother… I never would have lost you. You never would have ended up in Japan."
"That's true," she whispered after a moment's pause. "I also wouldn't have learned to take care of myself, I wouldn't have saved my brother, or learned how to control my powers…"
"You might have if I had let you explore them instead of shutting you down every time you used them," he reminded her and then he paused. "Wait you saved your brother? From what? Not the Stepanovs?"
Rowan waved her hand and he nodded. Alright, so they weren't at that part of the story yet. He'd have to drop it for now.
"I… I promised myself, if I ever managed to get you back, I wouldn't go back to the way I was," he told her. "And I've already broken that promise."
"It's alright, Steven."
"No. It's not. And you really have to stop being so easy on me," he pleaded with her. He reached out for her again, taking both her hands in his as he stared into those perfect-blue eyes that always pulled him in like the tide pulled out to sea. "From now on, I'm going to work on it. I'm going to try to be more supportive and open of your powers. I will listen to your stories and try to not look horrified as you tell them. And the next time you have a vision I will listen to you."
"Wow, really? You'll listen to one of my visions?"
"Yes. But so help me, Rowan, if it's wrong, I'll never listen to you again."
Rowan laughed at that. "Then I will do my very best to be right."
"There's… there's one last thing. Did Wo Fat tell you about what we talked about?"
"He said you two came to some sort of understanding, but it wouldn't matter until I decided to forgive him."
"Yes. We did. He and I decided that… well I was being silly trying to separate you two. So… when you decide you're not mad at him anymore, I will allow the two you to remain in contact. Or… well… you know I won't get mad if you're talking to him. None of this, you can call him once a week, you can talk to him any time you want, and go to visit him any time you want. Though he did say he wanted weekly updates from you at the very least."
Rowan's mouth fell open again. "Wait… you and him… agreed to that?"
Steve nodded and her hands gripped him a little tightly. "Well damn, too bad I can't talk to him any time soon."
"Well if you feel like you're ready to forgive him…"
"No, it's not that. He's not talking to me. Until further notice I've been cut out."
Steve nodded. "Right yes, I remember you did mention that," he said. "Still surprised you did it, to be honest."
"It's the least I could do. He offered to do the same when you and I were first starting out."
Yes before he fucked them up by letting Catherine talk him into being casual with her. An offer he now regarded as a calculated move she made that was meant to damage him and Rowan in any way. He was also now certain that her just sliding back into a relationship with him less than 24 hours after Rowan went missing was also a calculated move. My god he had blind.
"Do you need to go back to your case?"
"No, I have Chin on it. He and Kono are going to help Jack and Angus. You can have me for the rest of the day. You know. If you'll have me!"
"Of course. You were who I originally wanted to bring here anyway," she said waving the server over so they could look at the menu together.
He watched her, each movement she made, the way her blue eyes flicked over to him. He barely even noticed the server beside them. He couldn't help it. He had come close to losing her today and he didn't think he'd ever get over that image, of seeing the woman who held his heart in the arms of another man.
It was time he told her. It was time she knew the truth. He couldn't go another minute without her knowing exactly how much he loved her, how much he needed her. He was going to tell Rowan Pierce that he loved her, maybe not there, not at that moment, but once he had the perfect place and atmosphere he would. He was going to do it as soon as he could.
H5O-H5O-H5O-H5O
As soon as he could ended up being that weekend. He had to bribe Nahele to go away for the weekend because the kid didn't want to leave. The last time he left Rowan and Steve had been attacked by a serial killer. He was now officially afraid to leave them because god knows what would happen next? He was not getting orphaned… again.
He had shouted all of this at Steve, and luckily Rowan hadn't been home because she would have cried and he never would have gotten the kid out of her arms or out of the house…ever again. But he had hugged Nahele close, apologized for stressing him out again and swore up and down that nothing was going to happen.
Steve was going to be off for the weekend. No drama. No work. He just wanted a weekend with Rowan, a little bit of romance that she deserved.
Add in five hundred dollars and a suite at a nice hotel for him and his friends and the kid was more than happy to give them the house to themselves for two nights.
Then he went straight to Danny and Kono for help with setting up the most romantic night he could muster up. But Steve didn't want to take her out. Oh no, any fool could get a fancy dinner reservation and wine and dine a girl and hand out presents. No. he was going to show her that he could make romance with his own two hands.
He was going to make dinner and dessert. He was going to have her favourite songs playing, he was going to pull out the note cards with the speech he had from when he went to Bahamas to go get her and tell her he loved her with the perfect words. Then they were going to dance under the stars to the song Perfect just like she had with Wo Fat because it was infinitely more romantic if it were with him and not her brother.
So on the day of, he sent Rowan for a spa day, telling her to get pampered, then to get ready for the most romantic date ever. She had taken the dress she would be changing into with her, and Steve had laid out the suit of choice. The Navy blue one that he knew she loved more than anything. He almost put aside his dress blues, but he was going for the tight suit today so show case his muscles and physique.
Steve then went to get everything he'd need for that day of cooking. Starting with going to Kamekona and begging him for the recipe to the Rowan Special spicy chicken that she loved. He hadn't wanted to give it up, special recipe and all but he explained why he needed it and why it needed to be him to make it instead of Kamekona and he agreed so long as Steve only made it once and destroyed the recipe once he was done.
Steve then went to the grocery store to pick up all the ingredients he'd need for to make the meal and the dessert. He got back to his house to find that Kono and Danny were in the process of setting up dinner for two in his living room. They had moved the couch and his lazy boy to make room for a bistro style wrought iron table. They had brought a pastel purple table cloth to drape over it and a vase of her favourite flowers as a centerpiece. Danny was in the process setting up elaborate candles in crystal candle holders. He must have dug out the fancy stuff from his own date supplies.
Danny had also given him extra notes for the romantic speech he wanted to give Rowan. He wasn't very good with his words, after all, and he wanted it to be perfect and since the original speech accused her brother of lying, he needed to rewrite a lot of it. So he had written down what he wanted to say and gave it to Danny who in turn gave it to Grace.
They sat for most of the afternoon talking about it. He rewrote his notes on new cards and took all of their advice. When they were perfect, it was finally time for his friends to leave. From here on in, he'd be on his own.
He thanked them all for his help and then went straight to cooking. He got the meal prepped and ready and then put it into the oven to keep it warm for when she arrived. He then went straight to the cheesecake.
The plan was to make chocolate-peanut butter cheesecake to pair with her cookie-dough ice cream that she loved so much. But he hadn't read the recipe. He didn't have time to let it chill for four hours, by the time he got the cake ready to chill, Rowan was going to be back in like one hour.
Okay, so it wasn't that bad, he'd just put the cheesecake in the freezer that would help it set faster. That couldn't go wrong right?
With everything ready he went up to get himself ready. He rushed up the stairs, took the shortest shower of his life, got changed, smothered himself in the cologne that she loved and then tousled up his hair. There was no point in styling it, he new this night was ending in sex and her hands would be all through it.
While he was waiting he set the table up for them. He checked on the meal, it was starting to cool a bit so he turned up the heat on the oven. He checked on the cheesecake, still gooey but solidifying quite nicely. He went back to the table to light the candles just as he heard Rowan's car drive up. He straightened immediately. Oh god. Dear God. It was happening. Not a drill, it was really happening.
Steve went for the door. Opening it up he was stunned speechless by the woman who stood there. Rowan's hair was pin straight and glossy to all hell. She had a severe smoky eye going on, her lips were blood red. But the navy blue crushed velvet dress she had on was causing his heart to constrict. It was knee length, it lead up to a high collar and it's sleeves were lace and billowing but they were loosely attached to the dress and had large holes for her shoulders to poke out of. And of course, she was once again in a pair of red-bottom heels. These ones were navy velvet like her dress and open toed.
"Well hello there handsome," she said moving towards him, she got part way to him and his hands snatched her up pressing her to him immediately. He kissed her slowly, leisurely but in a way that told her just how badly he wanted more. Her arms draped over his shoulders as her hands went into his hair. Ha, he knew it would have been stupid to put product into it.
"Hey baby girl," he replied with his own husky growl and her nose curled at the sound of it.
"Yeah, don't call me that," she said. "Literally anything but that, okay?"
Steve was slightly taken aback but nodded, not sure what else he could do as she looking him over appreciatively.
"Mmm, look at you, looking all fine… screw dinner let's just go upstairs…" she whispered huskily into him and it took all his will power to say no.
"I actually worked really hard on dinner."
Rowan dropped her hold on him and smiled. "Then come on, let's go eat."
He led her to the table where she ohhed and awwed like he knew she would then he pulled out her chair so she could sit down. Now to set the mood. He pressed the button the universal remote Nahele insisted he buy him and the music started playing.
A lively bouncy club tune.
"Oh are we having a dinner or a party?"
Steve felt his heart sink in his chest. Dear god it was the wrong CD. Steve went to the CD player, pulled it out and looked it over. He knew he should have had Nahele label the CDs. Nahele must have had his romance list and he had Nahele's party music one.
He hissed a bit trying to bite back a curse. Rowan was already out of her seat to stand beside him. "Hey," she said softly. "It's okay. I'll just hook up my phone, okay? I've got some romantic playlists."
Steve didn't want that though, he wanted to show her that he too could be romantic. But there wasn't anything he could do about it now so he let Rowan take over the music while he went into the kitchen for the champagne.
It was a brilliant idea, she didn't like champagne but she loved mimosas so he was going to make her those and that would be the drink of the night. But he was struggling with the cork. He was nervous so his palms were sweaty and he didn't quite have a good grip, but he got it to pop which would have been wonderful if the cork had not hit her straight between the eyes. Rowan hadn't been expecting it and she wasn't stable in those six inch heels of hers so the force of the hit knocked her down.
"Oh God!" Steve cried dropping the bottle without a second thought and rushing to her.
"Jesus!" she cried.
"Are you okay?" he asked her as he helped her up.
"Yeah, no, I'm fine, just a little startled," she said with a few breathy laughs. Steve helped her up and then noted that she was staring at something on the ground.
When he turned, he found that he had dropped the bottle, not on the counter like he thought but on the floor.
"God damn it!" he cried rushing to clean it up. Rowan teetered after him in her impossibly large heels to help him. "No, no, stay there, okay? I don't want you to fall."
Rowan nodded and then she stood back to watch him clean it up. As he was furiously mopping the floor with hand towels, Rowan asked: "Is something burning?"
Dinner!
Steve got up lurching for the oven. He opened it up and a billowing cloud of smoke erupted from it. He scrambled to get the plates out of the oven and found that he had charred both of them. He dropped them to the stove top trying not to growl. But he must have been scowling pretty hard because Rowan stepped over the champagne mess to put a hand to his arm.
"Oh Steve, it's okay," she said. "We can just order something."
Steve left her to plunk himself down at the chair that was supposed to be his. They had only been at this for ten minutes and he had fucked everything up.
"Why don't you tell me what you were making?"
Steve sighed. "I had Kamekona give me his hot and spicy Rowan Special recipe."
"Awww… babe!" she cried and then quick as a bunny she whipped out her phone. "Hey Kame, we had a bit of a SNAFU, could you do me a favour? I need one order of a Hot and Spicy Rowan Special and a Sweet and Sour Shrimp for Steve? And could you get it to me like ASAP?"
As soon as she hung up she came towards him and she draped a hand to his shoulder. "Hey baby, it's okay. Kame's gonna drop us off the food and we got nice music," she said softly. "And I'm sure we can drink something else. Unless we needed the champagne to celebrate something…"
"No, I just… it was for mimosas… cause I know how much you like them," he said.
"Aww that's so sweet," she said, leaning in to kiss him. "Well, here's what we can do. Why don't I get us the ginger ale and we can pretend it's champagne?"
"I unno isn't that a little… silly"
"No, well… I don't think so. Wo and I did the exact same thing," she said. "We went for a gondola ride in Venice and he brought us a cheese board and champagne, and I was surprised because he knows I don't like champagne and well… it turned out to be ginger ale instead." She then looked up to him. "Unless you think it's silly."
"No, no, I'm fine with that."
Rowan disappeared into the kitchen to get the ginger ale and he went into his jacket pocket for the notecards. This wasn't when he wanted to do this but he could think of no better time to do this. Everything else had been messed up why not go off script? She hadn't run away from this disaster of a dinner, she was being supportive and trying to keep the dinner going even though it was clearly screwed up.
But Rowan came back with the ginger ale and his mouth ran dry. He quickly hid the cards again suddenly no longer ready to bare his heart to her. The atmosphere wasn't right.
She poured the ginger ale for both of them, and then she sat on his lap sipping from the champagne flute and trying to make small talk with him while they waited for the food. She tried anyway, Steve was suddenly too nervous to talk.
Was it bad that everything he had tried tonight had messed up? Was it a sign? A sign that no matter how hard he worked he'd never be that person who deserved Rowan.
When the food came it was a godsend. She got to sit down in her own chair as he doled out their dishes. There was silence over the food, only because he didn't know what to say. He wanted to just come out and say it. Just blurt the I love you to her, but he had been holding out for romance for a reason. He had to at least try to make this worthy of her.
They finished their meal and Steve had been struck in awe by the way she looked in the candle light as she spoke about the newest single she had written and the drama around getting the price point she wanted when he decided that right then and there, that was the right moment.
"I'm sorry to interrupt," he said not feeling sorry in the slightest. "I was hoping that I could… tell you something."
Rowan stopped and nodded and he pulled out the notecards out of his jacket pocket. The ones that Danny and Grace had helped him with and a small teasing smile donned her lips. "Notecards?"
"Yes I… uh… I wanted to get this right so I wrote it down…"
Rowan giggled a little and it took real willpower to peel his eyes away from her. My god sometimes she was so lovely it pained him to even look at her.
He cleared his throat and then focused on the words written on the notecards. "I… I can count the moments that changed my life on a single hand. There's the day my dad told me that our mother was dead, the day I decided I was going to join the Navy, the day my father died and now… the day I met you."
He paused to look at her and found her smiling at him clearly quite touched already. Wonderful it was just as he wanted. And then the notecards in his hands went up in flames.
He must have had them too close to the candles. Stupid candles! He couldn't contain his yelp as he dropped them to the table and struggled to put them out, but it was Rowan who took the vase of flowers and then upended them onto the fire.
It put the fire out but it had also strewn the flowers everywhere and soaked him. He tried to salvage the cards but they were ruined. His speech was gone.
"I'm sorry," she said with a wince. "Are they okay?"
"No."
"Do you need them?"
YES! But Steven couldn't say that, instead, he stood up trying to push his worry and disappointment aside. "It's alright. Why don't I get dessert ready, maybe you could clean this up?"
Rowan nodded and went about picking up the flowers and he went into the kitchen to get the cheesecake out of the freezer. But when he did he could tell right away that something was wrong, it was all together too heavy.
He tried to cut it but his knife wouldn't go through, the damn thing had frozen solid.
Rowan came into the kitchen to fill the vase with water, her flowers were a little bruise and bent, one even looked to be singed, but she didn't seem to mind. "Oh what's that?"
"It's a chocolate-peanut butter cheesecake," he said. Letting go of the knife so she could see that it was stuck there.
"Oh… oh dear what is wrong with it?"
"I put it in the freezer to help it chill faster…"
"It's frozen, isn't it?"
He couldn't even answer. This night was an unmitigated disaster. He lost his speech, and he had managed to get every single thing wrong. Now she'd think him completely useless and he had lost the moment to tell her how he really felt.
They were silent for a moment and then Rowan tilted her head back and started to laugh. Steve was so startled by it that he could only turn a shocked stare to her.
She was laughing. Why was she laughing? Why did she think this was funny? Here he was trying to make this the most romantic night ever and he had failed. Failed miserably. Rowan deserved someone who could deliver the night of her dreams. He couldn't even put a cheesecake on the goddamn table.
Scowling Steve stormed out onto the lanai. He was dangerously close to bursting out in tears, none of this had gone right and now he couldn't tell her. He couldn't tell her how he really felt. And she'd keep on thinking that he… and… that wasn't fair.
"Wait!" Rowan called rushing after him. She paused once she hit the lanai to kick her shoes off so she could follow him out onto the beach. "Steve, wait, come on, I'm sorry I laughed but it was funny!"
She gripped Steve's arm, she tried to come to stand in front of him but he pivoted away from her so she couldn't see the unshed tears in his eyes.
"It's not funny Rowan… tonight was supposed to be… it was supposed to be perfect," he snapped and he almost felt Rowan's smile fall off her lips.
Still holding his hand she half turned, he watched out of the corner of his eye. She stared out at the water, then up to clear starry sky above them. When she turned those beautiful eyes back to his she had a smile on her face.
"Come on."
She tugged on his arm, tried to pull him down to the surf. Steve dug his feet in, he didn't want a romp in the sand, he wanted to drop to his knees and beg her to stay with him even though he couldn't do anything right, even though she deserved someone so much better than him.
"Rowan…"
"Just trust me, okay? Come on," she said and he relented like he always did. He let her tug him down to the water where she waited for him to kick off his shoes, when he was barefoot in the sand she pulled him straight into the water, the waves hitting his dress pants, soaking him to his knees.
She then pulled him to her, her arms encircling around his neck holding him there.
"You were going for romantic, right?" she asked and he nodded. She smiled warmly at him. "Well there's nothing more romantic then a moonlit beach, the calm of the waves and being under the stars in the arms of someone special. So go ahead. You said you had something important to say to me that I'm guessing you needed romance for? So, here we are, nice romantic setting, go ahead and tell me what you have to tell me."
Steve looked down to her, was this really enough? Was it? Did she really only need the sand, the surf, the stars and him? Her eyes reflected those stars back at him, sucking the air out of his lungs. It may not have been the perfect night that Danny had planned but he could still make this work.
Now if only he was brave enough to tell her the truth.
"I… don't have my note cards."
"So? You don't need them. Just tell me whatever it is."
Steve shook his head again. "I'm not good at this Rowan," he whispered to her. "It's not going to be perfect words…"
"As long as they're your words, they'll be perfect."
"See... how do you do that? How do you just spit out stuff like that without thinking about it…"
"I work with words for a living Steven, it's easy for me. Now go on, tell me what you have to tell me."
Steve took a deep breath looked deep into her eyes and began to talk.
"I can count the terrible moments in my life on a single hand. I used to think that the worst moment in my life was my father sitting both Mary and I down and telling us that mom had died in a car accident which was closely followed by him shipping both me and Mary off. I can now easily say that the worst moment in my whole life was standing in a Japanese morgue being told that the body I unearthed half a day before really was you. And that is only barely eclipsed by the day I listened to your sweet voice tell me that you weren't coming back, you wanted me to go away and that I had picked Catherine, you had picked Wo and I just had to live with that. And we're not even going to talk about how learning CPS was going to take Nahele from me shattered what was left of my world.
"It's because of that that I freaked out when Wo Fat came back… because we've been arguing and… he took you once Ro, he could easily do it again. Because that's what I'm the most scared of… him taking you from me again."
"Is that what the dreams are about?"
"Sometimes I dream that you never came back. Sometimes I dream that the body he left for me really was you. Rowan… I lost you… and then I lost Nahele and then he sent me all those pictures and videos and you looked so happy… and then… and then you went into Colombia and he came out and you didn't… and you had… that fight in the jungle I thought maybe… maybe something had happened…"
"I'm so sorry Steven…"
"The point is, Rowan. I'm terrified. I'm terrified that you're going to disappear again. I'm terrified that if you go, I'll lose Nahele again, I'll lose my mind again and I'm scared that I… well… I won't survive loosing you again because I… I love you too much."
Rowan blinked her eyes in surprise. Oh god he had said it. He had said it and she hadn't been expecting it. Her hands came away from his neck, resting against his chest. He wouldn't have let her push him away, his grip tightened reflexively as he continued to talk to her.
"It hurts, all the time. I mean it's worse if I can't be with you, but you have this power over me and it overwhelms me all the time. You make me happy, but I know that my happiness depends on you staying with me, if you ever decide that you want a guy that's more like you and less tied up with Five-0 I… I don't know what I'd do… probably kill myself. I just… you can't leave me, Rowan. I love you and I… I need you to…"
Rowan jumped up on her tippy toes pressing a deep kiss to his lips. When she pulled away from him she had tears in her eyes just like he did. "I love you too."
That time when Steve kissed her they didn't stop.