I don't own Twilight. What I own is my character's behavior, personality, background, and plot of the story.
Thanks to my Beta MadMooey18 for her constant support and help in making this story what it is today.
"I'm so happy that we're hanging out more," Alice tells Bella as she sits by the window waiting for Bella to finish getting ready for the bonfire in La Push.
Bella turns to her and wonders, "Are we hanging out more?"
She gets up and goes toward her desk and checks her bullet journal. "Nope, same amount of hanging out."
She gets back to her vanity and continues her makeup.
Alice opens her mouth to clarify that she meant hanging out alone, since up until recently, she had to share her with Tanya and Irina, but pauses and whistles instead. "Who is the hottie moving next door?"
Bella shrugs her shoulders not paying Alice any attention as she tries not to poke her eye out with the mascara wand. "Bella!" Alice yells louder trying to get her attention.
"What?" Bella yells turning to glare at her, the mascara all over her nose. This is why she prefers hanging out with Tanya and Irina over Alice: they understand when she needs silence to concentrate, and when it's okay to badger her.
"Who is your new neighbor?" Alice asks her, not letting Bella's anger get to her.
Bella goes back to her makeup as she wonders out loud, "I have a new neighbor?"
"Yep, some blonde dude is moving in with Morty Hunter."
Finally, it dawns on Bella. "Oh, that's his son Jamie. Edward told me about him moving back a month ago. Morty and Edward's father attend the same AA meetings."
Alice sighs dreamily as she stares at him and mutters to herself, "I don't think daddy will like me dating Morty's son, but we will figure something out."
Bella rolls her eyes at Alice and asks, "Who's we? I sure as hell have no interest in figuring anything out."
Reason number two: She is always scheming to get a boy. Irina and Tanya would never.
Alice turns to Bella and tells her, "Don't be silly. I am talking about Jamie and I!"
"Stop the delusion, Alice. You don't even know the guy."
Alice glares at Bella and tells her in an accusatory tone, "I sure as hell hope this isn't your attempt at showing interest in him. He is mine."
Bella barks a laugh and tells her, "Me? Never!" She used to tell Jamie that her dad would send him to jail if he bullied Edward. Of course she is not interested.
"You better stick to your word because he and I are meant to be. I can feel it in my gut," Alice tells her in a warning tone.
"That's probably constipation."
Alice gives her an unimpressed look and tells her, "Keep mocking me all you want, but some day my unlimited optimism will get me my Prince Charming."
After that, both are silent as each one of them thinks about her Prince Charming. Alice continues to watch Jamie from the window as she daydreams about who Jamie might be. She wonders if he likes waxing poetry, or is he more the type to pick up a guitar and sing a song about eternal love, and soul mates.
No one is accusing Alice of being realistic.
Bella on the other hand thinks of Edward and the lovely Samantha. Oh yeah, it took Edward only two weeks from ending things with Angela to meet the lovely Samantha in Port Angeles. Alice, Edward and Bella had gone to Port Angeles to hang out with Tanya and Irina since they moved there. They original planned on going out for dinner, however the sales clerk in the bookstore they went into was none other than Samantha. When Edward chatted with her, he all but forgot their dinner plans.
Nothing is wrong with Samantha. She is nice, kind, beautiful, and intelligent.
She is much better than Lily. Bella shudders as she remembers Lily.
The problem is that she is the most generic person someone could be. There is nothing unique about her, nothing to make her stand out. She is a cookie cutter person. The quintessential girl next door, and Edward bless his heart, is not exactly selective about who he dates.
Bella used to think that people like her don't exist in real life. They only exist in YA novels so teen girls could project themselves onto them and imagine themselves in their place when they inevitably meet prince charming who swoops them off their feet. Bella used to wonder if it's all a persona and underneath it, there is more. She tried to piss her off or surprise her a couple of times to see if she will break out of character.
Turns out that under the surface, there is more surface.
"Let's go," Bella tells Alice as soon as she finishes her makeup. She stands up then walks down the stairs followed by Alice. They leave her house and walk over to Garrett's place since he promised them a ride.
On the way, a basketball rolls in their direction so Bella stops it with her foot from rolling into the street. Bella looks around and spots a blonde guy jogging down the porch steps in their direction. The ends of his dirty blonde hair sweeps his shoulders as he jogs toward him. Biceps bulge from under his shirt, not as big as Emmett's, but bigger that Edward's. His green eyes and straight nose makes him someone who stands out in a room.
It's Jamie, she realizes. With this realization comes Bella's agreement with Alice's assessment for the first time. He is very good looking. Had she not met Edward already, he would have been her ideal guy.
"Thank you for catching it. Replacing it would have been a pain in the ass," he tells her, rushing in her direction before coming to a stop in front of her and giving her a charming smile.
Bella ignores his thanks and smirks telling him, "It seems that all of your mum's jail threats were in vain. What a shame."
Jamie looks at her in confusion unsure what she means. "I am the daughter of the police officer that was supposed to jail you, Jamie."
"I no longer go by Jamie," he automatically tells her then pauses for a moment a light bulb going off in his head. "Bella, long time no see. I almost didn't recognize you. You sure as hell have grown."
Bella detects a southern accent and finds herself wondering if his accent truly did change, or if he is trying to charm her.
"I didn't change that much. You need to get your eyes checked."
Jamie shakes his head and tells her, "You changed a lot, and dare I say for the better. You were always a cute kid, but now you're on the next level."
Yep, he is trying to charm her.
"I hope this isn't your attempt at flirting, because it's not that impressive." Bella finds herself saying before she can stop herself finding herself feeling on edge. Maybe it's his disarming familiarity, or maybe it's the way he looks at her, a lion watching a gazelle through the grass.
He puts the basketball under one arm and places the other in his pocket and asks, "You think if I switch up strategies, It will be impressive?"
Suddenly, it dawns on Bella that he isn't just messing with her. His question has a meaning. The Jamie who liked climbing trees with her is now a teen who likes girls.
She is a girl. She doesn't want that. She doesn't want to be a part of the category of girls guys wanna date. That is extra attention she doesn't need, nor know how to handle.
Bella shrugs and says, "We need to leave," then turns to Alice and tells her, "Let's go." She takes her hand in hers and drags her as they walk quickly toward Garrett's home. Once they are no longer within hearing range, she lets out the breath she has been holding and slows down.
She contemplates the discomfort she is feeling and tries to think of a way to get rid of it. Unlike with Edward, her discomfort doesn't come from a place of knowing he doesn't like her, it comes from a place of knowing that he likes her, and that; is an alien experience. It bubbles to the surface feelings she doesn't know what to do with, a giddiness that feels sinister.
"I changed my mind. You can have him," Alice tells her, pulling her out of her deep thoughts.
"Huh?" Bella asks her in confusion.
"Jamie," Alice clarifies, which makes Bella realize her mistake.
"Alice, I am so sorry. I should have introduced you and tried to include you in the conversation instead of whatever weird discussion that just happened," she turns to her friend and tells her apologetically as they stroll.
"You mean all the flirting?" Alice asks her.
Bella winces and feels even worse. "That wasn't supposed to happen. I am so sorry you had to see that. I have no interest in him, y'know girl code and all. Plus, if I were to break the girl code, it wouldn't be for Jamie."
It would be for Edward.
Alice rolls her eyes at Bella and tells her, "Be fucking real, Bella. We both know minutes are all it takes for me to like a guy, and a couple of extra ones are all it takes for meto get over him. I will just go and like someone else. Plenty off fish in the sea!"
"What makes you think I wanna date him? I don't even like him," Bella exclaims in frustration coming to a stop. This entire conversation is infuriating. Who said she wants to date? She doesn't. She wants to be single for the rest of her life. She has big plans for her life. Entertaining boys isn't one of them.
In a way, Edward's lack of interest in her is a blessing in disguise.
Alice smirks at her enjoying the flustered look on Bella's face. She is too used to being the one having a dating dilemma and Bella being cool and collected. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
"He likes you, and that is always a good reason to go out with a guy."
"Who likes Bella?" Garrett asks from behind them, making his presence known.
"Jamie," Alice answers.
Garrett shakes his head in mock disappointment and tells her, "I am so disappointed in you, Bella. Are you keeping secrets from me."
Bella shakes her head and tells him, "There is no secret to begin with. Alice thinks he likes me, but that is only because she is a know-it-all who actually knows nothing."
Sensing that she is too uncomfortable with the topic, Garret lets it slide, but not before giving Alice a look that tells her to do so as well. Alice glares at him in disappointment, but makes a zipping motion promising her silence. They finally get into the car together. Garret keeps the car chatter going as he tells the both of them about his plan for the gap year he is taking with Kate before college.
"Please stop! Backpacking through Southeast Asia, volunteering in central America, and a road trip throughout the states. You are living my dreams. This is so unfair! Please shut up," Bella tells him in a whining tone. Never had Bella wished to be older than now. As much as she loves learning, she also wants to experience life. She wants to see the world. Do something beyond learning.
Be someone.
Garret turns to look at her and tells her, "You know, we will do the road trip in the summer only. You could come with us, and be back with enough time for school."
Bella shakes her head and tells him, "Nah, I can't afford it plus I have some courses and workshops I want to take this summer. Plus, Edward won't like that."
"You have 8 months. You can save up for it, and take the courses online," Alice tells her, sticking her head between them from the back seat.
Bella thinks over Alice's suggestion for a moment. The experience and character building she would gain from such an experience is priceless and would make up for whatever classes and workshops she can't take online. She could take a job and save up for the trip. Actually, she needs to get a job and start saving for college. It would be so much fun. She shakes her head. No, she can't. As much as she is adventurous, Edward isn't. He would never sign up to such a thing.
"I can't. Edward won't like it."
"He's not your boyfriend. It shouldn't matter that he doesn't like it," Alice replies.
Bella rolls her eyes at Alice and tells her, "He is my best friend. His opinion does matter."
"If you ask me, I don't think he will care what you do," Alice states.
Bella quickly turns around in her seat to face Alice and demands, "What do you mean?"
Finding herself under Bella's scrutinizing gaze, Alice nervously rubs the back of her neck and tells her, "You're adults. He would be okay with not spending the summer with you."
"So what, because we are adults, our friendship is dead?" Bella asks her, feeling like she was slapped in the face.
Is she that forgettable that growing up is all it would take for Edward to stop caring about her? She is not even significant enough for him as a friend? No wonder, he doesn't see her. Suddenly, Bella realizes that a part of her, had been holding out on hope that Edward will see her and he will fall in love with her. At some point, he will realize that she is the most beautiful person he has ever met and realize that he won't have to look anywhere else for the love of his life, because she is right in front of him.
Just like she did.
"What she meant to say was that Edward is a fuckboy who is being lead by his dick and anything that doesn't involve his dick comes second place." Garrett's words break through the fog.
She shakes her head. He isn't. Is he a serial dater who is never single for more than two weeks? Sure. If it's not Jessica, it's Emily. If not Emily, it's Diana. If not Diana, it's Lily, and if it's not Lily, it's Angela, and if it's not Angela, it's Samantha. If the dictionary had a picture for the word serial dater it would be him. Yet, he isn't a fuck boy.
"Edward isn't a fuckboy. He doesn't cheat on any girl he is with or date more than one girl at the same time."
Garrett rolls his eyes at her answer and tells her, "I am a man. I know when a guy is a fuckboy. Believe me, cheating isn't a prerequisite to being a fuckboy."
"Doesn't change that Edward cares for me and values our friendship," she tells them defensively, not liking how they are talking about Edward. Both Garrett and Alice are his friends too. Why do they think they can talk about him like that?
"Sweetie, how many times has he ditched you for a girl. I can think of five at the top of my head. I am sure you can think of more."
Bella opens her mouth to defend him, but comes up empty. Alice has her there. Since he started dating a year ago, she has been demoted to second place. Whoever he is dating comes before her. She finds out stuff about him with others more times than not, and the worse part is; when he dumps them, they all come to her, some are looking for a shoulder to cry on, others for someone to blame.
"Sweetie, you always assume the best in people and that is a good trait, but it also means that it's my job as your friend to tell you when you are giving someone the benefit of the doubt that they don't deserve," Alice tells her in a kind tone.
Is that it? Is she giving Edward more grace than she should? Suddenly, her mind is bombarded with all of the times that they would go out together only from him to leave her to hang out with some girl or tell her to go home alone cause he is meeting some girl.
If Edward is prioritizing dating over her, then shouldn't she do the same? Shouldn't she go ahead and date people, move on, and stop acting like there is no one else in her life but Edward?
She turns to stare out of the window not sure what the answer is.
Hello lovely people,
I am a monster. I know. Three months without an update, a monster makes. I wish I could give you a legitimate excuse that will make you guys pardon me, but I am afraid my reason are very basic: a mix of life getting in the way, writer's block, diverted attention, anxiety, and a healthy dose of burnout.
Having said all of that, I am back to a regular updating schedule. I will take turn updating this story and my other story Risk it all once a week. I may, or may not update Risk it all earlier as a gift for your immense patience.
What do you think of this chapter? What were your favorite part? What parts are you mad at? Leave me a review telling me your thoughts, or yelling at me for taking too long to update. I am fine with either one at the moment.
Until my next update,
Stay safe