There's something lightly poking my head. "Wake up Sexy Man, wake up and analyze your surroundings like a good protagonist." I want to sleep though, I'm tired.
Last night I asked Ciel for some extra training, and she definitely supplied! I still haven't recovered from it... And I also feel like Kohaku's tea that was supposed to make me rest well just made me feel even worst.
The strange voice continues. "Seriously Sexy Man, your time is running out. If you don't wake up in the next five seconds this will turn into a completely different story." I guess that's my cue to obey.
I open my eyes, and the sight before me breaks my brain. "Arcueid, did you turn yourself into a chibit cat girl? Why did you do that?" I won't judge before asking why, okay I might be judging a little.
Arcueid smirks. "I am not Arcueid, I could never appear in F/GO Sexy Man! However you can...!" How did she say the slash!? And what does she means she's not Arcueid!?
The chibi puffs her chest. "As for my identity? Let's keep that a secret from now on. Simply call me... Cute, sexy, hot, gorgeous, beautiful, amazing, wonderful woman." She nods to herself. "Or CSHGBAWW for short." That's way too complicated!
I struggle my way into getting up. "No way am I calling you that." She steps back in shock. "Your name is definitely way better and more beautiful, so just tell me." I can fuck this.
The chibi blushes. "S-still just as dangerous as ever! Amazing!" She takes a moment to think. "But telling you my name might be a bit too... lame. I want to be mysterious damn it!"
She raises both of her arms. "Can't you see I just brought you into mysterious lands!? I gotta keep the mystery of this mysterious story going...!"
I sigh. "I see, okay then CSHGBAWW it is." I won't deny a cute...? Girl the pleasure of being a mysterious character, even if it's sounds completely and utterly stupid.
There's stars on her eyes. "Y-you remembered all that!? Even I forgot...! Ah, that's it, pick a girl! Pick a class! I will definitely give you a high class five star servant!"
She continues. "I just can't resist you, even if you make my credit card go away! You want a Summer Skadi!? A Koyanskaya!? A Oberon!? A Castoria!? You can get it all! I'll get you all the best farmer supports available!"
Rika leaves my shadow, now awake. "What's with all that racket...?" She then looks at CSHGBAWW. "D-did Bimbocueid turns herself into a chibi!?"
I shake my head. "No, this is Cute, sexy, hot, gorgeous, beautiful, amazing, wonderful, woman, or CSHGBAWW for short. Totally different people."
Rika nods. "Okay, I see I'm still dreaming! So I'll just go along with whatever happens from here on out!"
CSHGBAWW nods to that with a smile. "Good, that's the sign of a good heroine, keep ignoring the world around you and focus only on your man..."
She puts her little paws on her chin. "Well, I guess I should despise you... But I got addicted to NTR, this is definitely hell." She nods to herself. "And what cruel hell it is, for we are in... shit, where are we in again?"
She scans around. "Definitely not Fuyuki, that got skipped...? Why did that get skipped!?" She gasps. "We skipped Orleans too!? But what about Jalter!? Seriously...! No, don't tell me...!"
She takes a step back in shock. "We skipped almost all of part one." She falls on her knees. "So many good waifus wasted, it's almost like starting a gacha game many years after its release." She punches the ground. "No, not almost like that! It's Exactly like that!"
Rika gets behind me. "I think she might be missing a few screws Yuta, maybe we should leave..." And go where exactly!? I still don't even know where I am!
CSHGBAWW sighs. "Whatever, let's get started. Now Sexy Man, confess which one do you prefer...? A young body that will get you in jail? A JK body? A curvaceous body? A body that has things that look suspiciously like balloons!?"
There's only one answer I can give here. "I prefer the ones that look like Rika." But please give me all the rest as well, and multiple of them if possible.
Rika blushes. "Wow, I suddenly got hit with a full power Yuta love beam! How amazing! It almost makes me forget this weird cat creature who's definitely an hallucination!"
CSHGBAWW giggles. "Don't worry, I'll be leaving soon, but I'll give you three gifts Sexy Man! First of all, I'll hide your presence from the King of Mages, so he doesn't snipe you or something... And also from the other scary fellas"
She nods to herself. "Second of all, I'll tell you where you are... It's the Absolute Demonic Front Babylonia." That doesn't mean anything to me though! "And my third and final gift is!"
She starts shining. "Let's roll! Only cute girls are allowed! Take out all the men! What's that, the weird Fujimaru guy/girls started with one free servant!? Then my hubby gets two!"
Rika gets in front of me, shielding me from what's about to happen. "G-get ready Yuta! Something big is coming!" I can tell! The cat is using an absurd amount of mana somehow!
The familiar image of a dead Rika flashes through my mind. "Give me everything." I pump grain through my body, using it as a defensive shield.
It's a weird sensation from normal, mostly because the mana in the air feels heavier. Nonetheless my grain is still of higher quality and it eats through it as easily as it normally does.
The cat gives one final scream. "Remember to learn how to do this! You have way more mana than that stupid golden king anyways!" And then she explodes, yet no one is hurt.
My hand feels like it's burning, I look at it and see three shining red markings. More importantly however, I feel my mana being slowly passed on to two someone's!
I look at the two new arrivals. "W-wow." That's the only thing I can say, that's because the cat lady just exploded herself into two new waifus somehow.
The first one has a bloodthirsty grin on. "Introductions are in order, even if I already understand the gist of the situation. I am Scathach, of the Lancer Class!" She points at me. "And I'm making you into a real man... seriously, so much potential~." I feel like I need an adult.
The other woman looks shocked. "Ah! Is this what they call a cougar...?" She immediately gets a glare from Scathach, nonetheless she keeps her shocked stare.
Her attention suddenly shifts to me. "Sorry, I should introduce myself, shouldn't I? I am Okita Souji Alter... From the Alter Ego class." She squints her eyes. "So who is my master here...? The pretty lady or the pretty boy...?"
She suddenly shakes her head. "No, it has to be the pretty boy right?" She looks at the Rika. "Though I guess I wouldn't mind the pretty lady either..." Rika is the pretty lady!? I agree.
She immediately receives a thumbs up from Rika. "I like you! You get the honorary title of Rabbit Two!" She reached Senpai's level that quickly!?
Scathach sighs. "How would you even confuse our master...? Don't you feel that connection to him...?" Her eyes get hazy. "Specially when he has so much mana... Ah, is like they dropped the next Herakles on my lap~, no, it's even better than him~."
Okita blinks in confusion. "Connection...?" She closes her eyes for a moment, and then opens them up, looking at me. "Oh, I do feel it. Sorry Master, I didn't mean to be rude..."
I give them an awkward smile. "That's fine...? But why are you guys calling me master? Who even are you two?" Well, I have their names, and I recognize them from class, but that isn't helping much.
Rika nods. "Yeah, normally the only person who calls Yuta 'master' is Rabbit, and that's only when she's doing some... stuff." It's honestly impressive how perverted she can be sometimes.
Scathach nods. "Very well. I shall explain soon, but first of all give me your name boy, if you haven't noticed, you did not introduce yourself."
I continue my awkward smile. "Ah, that's true, sorry... I'm Yuta Okkotsu. I work as an executor for the Holy Church, more specifically I am a member of the Burial Agency."
Rika introduces herself. "And I am Rika! I am his loyal, beautiful, pretty, amazing girlfriend!" Why did you add so much!? Are you CSHGBAWW now!?
Okita's eyes widen... A little. "Amazing...! How am I supposed to keep up with that..." She looks down. "Mission failed..." What are you talking about?
Scathach for one smiles. "A member of the Burial Agency? I see you have already begun your journey." She then shakes her head. "But that does not matter right now, what you need to know is this..."
She continues. "Both me and that woman over there are heroic spirits, engravings made by the counter force from powerful historic figures. We have been summoned and anchored to this world using your mana."
She's really giving off a teacher feeling right now. "Our current objective is defeating the King of Mages and restoring human history... That's an abbreviation of it of course, I'll give you a more detailed explanation of it later."
I can almost hear CSHGBAWW whispering on my ear. "Exposition dumps are lame... Everybody already knows this shit, so it's gonna be explained offscreen...!" And what beautiful words they are!
Okita nods along to Scathach explaining, until she desperately starts shaking her head. "Wait! That's not why I am here at all! I remember my true purpose... This time."
Scathach raises an eyebrow. "And that would be...? Don't tell me you are an enemy." Yeah, specially since you're so hot. Actually both of you are way too damn hot, it's almost unfair.
Okita proudly puffs her chest. "I have been chosen by the red to continue the Okkotsu bloodline. I must turn my body physical and then take on Master's seed..."
She gives me a smile. "It may be an arranged marriage, but I'm looking forward to it nonetheless, because having someone to love sounds wonderful. Please take care of me..." She blushes. "D-dear." To that I can only say one thing.
"Life is confusing sometimes."
AN: I'll eventually also do a LB omake, so you can say this is the part 01 Omake... Also, more servants will be summoned with time... probably.
Also total word of god here, if Canon Yuta never managed to find a girlfriend, Alaya would gift wrap him one of her guardians...