"W-wow! Humans truly are amazing!" Please don't say that after taking a bite of the world's greasiest burger... Specially when you're dressed like a princess straight out of a fairy tale. Though I guess Arcueid always looks like a princess anyways, whether she wears a special dress or not.

I nod, my expression stuck on a smile. "Yeah, we made some decent food throughout the eras." Even if I can only handle like half a burger before dying. "Gotta say though, I didn't expect you would want to come here." Not that I'm against it or anything though.

Originally I was undecided on whether I should take Arcueid to something like a high-end restaurant, or a theme park. It didn't matter in the end though, since I didn't get to make any choices. Arcueid simply dragged me around without a care for the world... as usual.

Arcueid pouts, it looks incredibly cute, because of course it does. "Is there something wrong with me coming here?" Well you are overdressed for the occasion, and so people are giving us weird looks. Not that I care of course, I did drag a passed out nun through the city that one time.

I chuckle. "Not at all, I just expected a more... Classical activity? Like, maybe you want to go to an opera or something." Arcueid is a vampire after all, and while she doesn't normally act like one... She definitely can when she wishes. So I had the wrong expectation that she would be into some vampiric activities.

The princess shrugs. "Eh. It doesn't matter for me, as long as I'm hanging out with my lil' bro everything's good!" Ah, this again, huh? "Besides, I want to experience what normal humans do." No normal human eats fast food... or at least they shouldn't.

I smile. "I see, well make sure to enjoy yourself. There's a price you must pay for these burgers after all..." Your health! Not that I care that much about mine, and Arcueid is a vampire...

Her eyes widen. "It does...?" And then she calms down. "Oh right, money. Don't worry Yuta, I can pay for both of us if need be!" Hey don't act like I'm broke! I'm the type of guy that can buy a house for people I barely know!

I shake my head. "The price isn't money silly Arcueid..." She blinks in confusion. "It's your soul. Yep, now you belong to capitalism for the rest of your eternal life. Though after eating this burger, it might be eternal no longer."

She puts on a horrified expression. "Really!? Why didn't you warn me!? Or is this sort of reality just accepted by everyone, so you didn't feel it was important enough to tell your big sister!?" Stop calling yourself that! People are staring even harder...

Actually their stares are kind of funny, so feel free to keep doing it... Then again, considering you are a foreigner who's dressed all special for a burger joint, they might think you're an alien. They would be correct on that assumption of course.

I shrug. "Sorry, but this is indeed the end..." She gasps, so I might as well stop before she really believes it. "Just kidding. Don't worry Arcueid, your soul is still yours." Her naivete towards the world really is absurdly charming.

She blushes and looks down. "I'm not so sure about that anymore..." She then sighs. "I'll definitely be dreaming about you, won't I?" Wow, even I can't decipher your yandere speak today. How impressive.

Arcueid shakes her head. "But whatever, I shouldn't think about that right now!" She nods with a smile. "I'm just glad you're feeling good enough to start joking around again Yuta! You had me worried for a moment."

I awkwardly look around. "Yeah, sorry I brought the mood down at the beginning." It definitely wasn't fair to Arcueid, this is her date after all. I just couldn't help it though, not after hearing Elesia's story.

Arcueid gives me a big smile. "Don't worry Yuta! Your big sis will take on everything you have to offer!" Hah, that sounds lewd as hell... Which is good! Very good even, so good I might turn into a dumbass and start screaming about duct tape!

I get closer to Arcueid, my expression serious. "Everything? Is it like that?" Has the time come? I did bring condoms... Please tell me the time has come, because if given the opportunity I'll do it right here! Yes, in front of everyone! I don't care!

Arcueid seems more confused than anything. "Yes...? I feel like I'm losing you Yuta." Ah, so it wasn't like that in the end. Oh well, I fired my shot so I don't feel too bad about it. Besides I need to take my mind off the damn gutter, I haven't even kissed her yet.

I chuckle. "Don't worry your pretty head over it Arcueid." A (perverted) smug grin appears on my face. "I was just talking about sex." Preferably anal! Though I will take all other options as well. Huh, what? I shouldn't outright say that? Sorry, but I'm a honest guy!

I'm like Issei Hyoudou except that I have sex! Thank you Rika, for saving me from horrible editors! Also I'm against slavery, so I'm definitely miles ahead of mister dragon power ranger.

Arcueid blushes bright red. "B-but we are related Yuta!" We aren't! Like for real! "I can't believe you want to do that to me..." She looks down, I can almost see smoke leabing her ears. "My little brother desires my body... If Altrouge heard about this she would have a heart attack!" That's because she's actually your sister.

I sigh. "So no head?" I'm guessing no. Hopefully I can break through the moral implanted on me by society, I need to breed my sis- Arcueid is not my sister! There's nothing wrong about (consensually) breeding her!

Arcueid's blush hasn't disappeared at all. "Yuta you..." She closes her eyes. "Well, I suppose my time is short." What's that supposed to mean? "I might as well..." What's that supposed to mean!?

I blink in confusion, trying to comprehend reality. "Arcueid... for real? Is it gonna be like that?" It better be like that! She put my hopes on max by bringing me here! In front of a... a... love hotel.

Arcueid is blushing scarlet red. "Y-yeah, it's like that! Since you're so perverted Yuta." Don't put the blame on me! "Besides, this is a rare opportunity. Rika isn't around after all." You want to NTR her!?

I give Arcueid a serious look. "You do realize we're gonna need to tell Rika about this after the date is over, right?" Those were the rules she established aftet all. And I imagine my curse girlfriend was thinking more about innocent kissing...

Arcueid quickly nods. "Yeah, don't worry your big sis will handle her rage. Besides, as my little brother you belong to me, not to Rika." I imagine Altrouge must be made of trauma at this point.

So if everything is settled, then I have no other options. "Okay, let's do i-" Sadly I get interrupted by a loud voice. And it also doesn't sound like a voice that should exist around an area like this.

"Ah! I thought this would be the place for sure!" Arcueid and I instinctively look at the voice. It's a young girl, way too young to be here at least. And she's dressed like a typical martial artist.

A woman, around the same age as me, is standing besides her. She sighs with an annoyed look. "Another bust? Damn it, how are you this lost?" For some reason I feel a chill running through my spine while looking at her.

That's because she summoned dark feelings within me. Those feelings being something I had thought about and buried long ago... The feeling that if Shiki was a girl he would be my type.

The young girl has tears in her eyes "I'm sorry! But I thought this is where Big Bro was staying! I was like... ninety percent sure!" Her lips are trembling... It's activating something within me.

The other woman rolls her eyes. "Geez, you have said that about every place we visited so far." She looks down. "You know what? Screw it, I'm asking for directions." Why didn't you do that before!

The young girl shakes her head. "D-don't do that! She had spies everywhere... probably! And a martial artist like me is never supposed to ask for help! I can definitely handle it all myself!"

The older woman shakes her head. "Don't be an idiot... besides, I have been helping you haven't I?" She looks up. "Honestly I should have just ignored you. What's with me today? Helping kids isn't my style..."

She turns around to me and Arcueid, both of us are just awkwardly staring. "Hey, you two weirdos, c'mere." Her voice sounds strangely authoritatively, like a spoiled cat. "Don't worry, you guys can go get it on after you answer a question of mine."

The young girl steps back in shock. "G-get it on!? Wait these people are a couple!? A princess and a weirdly handsome bum!?" I appreciate the handsome part, but don't add the bum!

The older woman snorts. "Of course they are, this is that type of place after all..." She smirks. "Don't act like you don't know brat, you're already old enough to use the internet..." She then sighs. "Speaking of it... I really need to buy a new phone."

Arcueid and I ignore their little talk and move closer. Arcueid who's pouting is the first to talk. "So what do you two need? You're ruining the mood." Is Arcueid mad because she got cockblocked!?

The older woman nods. "Yeah, sorry about that. First of all, quick introductions, my name is Shiki Ryougi, don't worry about the brat." For some reason that name feels important. "So do you guys know where the Tohno Mansion is? They're supposed to be some big shots."

The moment she says that name something clicks. I don't know if I have heard the name Ryougi in a conversation with Ciel or with someone else, but I do know it. They're a family of demon hunters, like the Nanayas.

It doesn't take a genius to realize why she wants to find the Tohno's. And it doesn't take a genius to realize I definitely won't let that happen, Akiha is my awkward rich lady, I can't let her get killed.

Arcueid's eyes widen, but before she can say anything I glare at Shiki. It feels weird to glare at someone with that name. "Why do you want to know?" I'm pissed my date with Big Si- Arcueid has been interrupted, but it is what is is.

She raises an eyebrow. "What's with the hostility? Don't worry, it's nothing malicious." I notice her hand sliding down to a pocket. My instinct is screaming at me, and I don't have Rika with me... This is bad.

Arcueid noticing the tension in the air gets in front of me. It immediately makes me feel safer. "Were just a bit mad, because you interrupted our alone time." I can feel her hands tense up.

I take off my glasses, lines immediately appear over her body. "Yes, and I'm also a little bit suspicious because..." Should I bait her? Well, Arcueid is right here to act as shield, so it should be fine. "My name is Shiki Tohno." I do have the mystic eyes swag at least. I shall also ignore Arcueid's confused look.

Ryougi's eyes widen. "For real...?" She looks at the young girl. "For real...!?" What's with her sudden confusion? Shit does she know what Shiki looks like? Well, she could just look at a mirror. Funny, brain. I try.

The young gasps. "Ah! He does give that Big Bro aura!" She then gets into a fighting position. "But he's definitely not Big Bro! Let's beat up this imposter! Let's eject him!" Don't you dare say those cursed words!

Ryougi raises an eyebrow. "An impostor?" Then she looks at me. "So you're some super weirdo? Why do I always run into people like you? Did I do something awful in my past life?"

I don't have time to think about what she said though. That's because my mind is stuck on what the young girl said instead. Martial arts... And she's searching for her Big Bro who is a Tohno...

I put my glasses back up. "Ah, sorry. I didn't recognize you Miyako, you grew up a lot. Okay, let's get married, actually I will marry your friend right here too." She is very hot! Also if she's hanging out with Miyako she's probably not bad.

I now understand who this girl is. It appears the legendary Miyako Arima missed her big brother and went searching for him... Well, I will tease her for a bit before calling up the real Shiki.

Arcueid's face has morphed in shock. "W-wow, so fast!" She then nods to herself. "But your younger sister here understands the situation." Now I'm the older brother!? "By the way, my name is Akiha Tohno!" You are an amazing existence.

Ryougi jaw has fallen as far down as it can. "What the hell have I gotten mixed up on now...? Damn it Touko." For some reason Sensei comes to my mind at that name.

Miyako is desperately looking at me and then at Arcueid, constantly shifting between us. "W-what!? B-but you don't look like Big Bro..." She then glares at Arcueid. "Fix him up you demon! Even if he looks better like this..." Sorry Shiki!

Arcueid shrugs. "Sorry little Miyako... It's too late. Shiki is mine now, we even go to love hotels together." Well, Shiki and Akiha are not blood related... I need to erase images from my mind now, they are way too terrifying.

Miyako has tears in her eyes. "No...! Did I arrive too late!?" She then gives me a desperate look. "I'm sorry she turned you into a handsome bum that goes around proposing to everyone! Please forgive me Big Bro!"

I push my glasses up, a smirk on my face. "Don't worry Miyako... Your Big Bro forgives you... At least I'll do so if you marry me." I then give Ryougi a serious look. "Also, please help Miyako in her journey of redemption. Basically become my bride."

While Miyako is lost to despair, Shiki sighs. "Well at least you aren't trying to do some weird serial killer thing I guess. So you're not as weird as what I normally deal with." You just said some really concerning things!

Then Ryougi gives Miyako a weak chop on the head. "And you, stop freaking out. This ain't your brother." Wow, what a party killer. Though I guess we have dragged this joke on for long enough.

Miyako gives Shiki a hopeful look. "Really!? So my situation isn't hopeless!? I can still save Big Bro from that witch Akiha!?" Please don't say that, she might kill you for it. Or do something even worse...

Arcueid nods with a smile. "Yeah! I mean, I'm a foreigner right?" Miyako hesitantly nods at that. "We were just pranking you two! Consider revenge for interrupting us." Indeed, it immediately dragged Miyako down to worst girl tier.

I give her a smile. "Don't worry though. We're Shiki's friends, so we can just call him. My name is Yuta Okkotsu by the way." With that Miyako sighs in relief.

And so does Ryougi. "So this little adventure of mine is finally about to end." She crosses her arms. "Dealing with this little brat was such a pain, there's so many damn creeps on this city..." That's true! I might be included...

I raise an eyebrow. "How did you two meet anyways?" My guard is still up, Ryougi should be a demon hunter after all. If she's using Miyako things might get dangerous...

Shiki pouts. "I was just hanging around the city. My... boss, dragged me to this city, something about her sister. I saw this idiot crying around and so I had to lend a hand." We ignore Miyako's objection about being an idiot.

Ryougi gives a serious look. "By the way... I have no beef with the Tohnos." Ah, so she realized it huh? It's good she cleared up her intentions so quickly.

I smile. "Okay then, I'm calling Shiki... By the way Miyako, your mom will probably kill you." She did run away from home after all, so it's only natural Miss Arima would disciple her. I'm sort of happy she did though...

Shiki needs to keep more in contact with the Arimas after all. Maybe this can act as some sort of wake-up call to him, that his little sister loves him just as much as Akiha. Also that he needs to protect her from me!

Miyako looks down, pouting. "Ah... Sorry!" She then starts bowing. "Please don't tell my mom! I really will marry you if you don't!" Tempting, but I consider a mother's concern more important than my immoral lust.

I give her a wink. "I'll pass." She then gives me a terrified look, I ignore it and look at Shiki. "I might accept it if it comes from you though." Even if her name is really inconvenient.

Shiki smiles. "Sorry playboy, but I'm not looking for anyone right now." She then blushes. "That said, I hate that you're surprisingly effective... It's probably because my standards have been lowered from all the weirdos I hang out with." She grumbles at then end.

I smile. "So I don't have a chance? Normally I would give up at that, but for some reason I feel like that wouldn't be the correct choice..." I nod to myself. "I'll call you Cat from now on by the way." Calling her Shiki is pretty inconvenient... Also I feel like Cat fits for some reason.

She blushes. "I need to raise my standards. And fast." It's too late now. "Honestly, don't you have any shame? Your girlfriend is right here..." She looks at the vampire. "By the way, what's your name anyways?"

The princess smiles. "I'm Arcueid Brunestud! Yep, that one." Oh-uh. I wonder if this will turn into a fight after all?

"Oh, nice to meet ya." I can see you definitely recognized her, so react more! Just how used to weird stuff are you!?

AN: Sacrificing a H-Scene was the price for introducing Shiki and Miyako... Was it worth it, I wonder?

Before someone asks, yes I have messed quite a bit with canon to have a young Shiki here, but fuck it, who cares? If Nasu made a whole ass new universe for Narita, I can make another one to one day write Ryougi getting fucked.

By the way, god damn that new JJK OP is awesome. My favorite part is Mahito on the train having his fun... The little bastard is my favorite JJK villain.

He won't appear on this fic though. Besides the Shirou omake that is, gotta make Itadori suffer.