"I look good right!? In fact, I might look super good! Ah, I was born to be an eternal high school girl, now I just need to be careful about any castles full of Mogeko's." Please don't joke about that game! No one here, except for us two gets the reference anyways.
Still, I do have to admit that Kohaku looks utterly beautiful in her new uniform... Maybe her brother shouldn't be thinking about stuff like this. Thankfully I'm not her brother, so it's completely fine to perv a little on her new clothes. Besides, she's purposefully showing them off, since tomorrow is her first day of school and all.
I look her up and down. "It does look pretty good. It seems my school will now have two new idols to worship." Senpai has finally obtained rivals. "Though I will personally end the life of anyone that tries worshipping too hard." As it's expected of me, the big brother of our group. Though I also need to pay special attention to Hisui...
Her fear of being touched by men could lead to some problems, it even made me and Senpai think about enrolling her in a girl's only school. She wanted to attend the same school as me however, so the best we could do was warn the faculty. It shouldn't be too troublesome though, Kohaku will look out for her.
And she isn't the only one who will do so either. There's me, Senpai, Noel, Shiki, and I don't have a single doubt in my mind that Satsuki and Arihiko will do the same once we explain the situation to them. Or at least as much as we can explain of course...
Arcueid has stars in her eyes. "Wow, my daughters look so good!" It goes without saying that she's looking at both the proudly smiling Kohaku and the more shy Hisui. Also she's not actually their mom, I feel like I must remind the universe of that.
Ciel has dark stars in her eyes, one might even say she's the evil idol here. That said, her gaze is completely concentrated on Arcueid. "Leave my apartment please." With how much the vampire breaks into here, you think Ciel would be used to it by now.
Arcueid completely ignores her of course. "Ah! Now I want to attend school too! It's not fair that everyone else goes too!" That sounds like a horrible idea... at first glance. It might have some merit to be honest. Perhaps something like a normal place Arcueid has to routinely attend would make her a bit less... crazy?
Still, I think I might be the only person with that mindset, because Ciel immediately points at Arcueid. "No way! I won't let someone like you wander around causing trouble for innocent students." Also Arcueid might dethrone Ciel and become the most popular girl in the school... My senpai already has enough competition without her.
Rika then leaves my shadow, she copies Ciel. "Yeah, you can't go Bimbocuied! I need at least a little bit of time per day detached from you!" Just because she isn't there, doesn't mean she's not watching us.
Arcueid fakes crying. "Kohaku, Hisui, Lil' Bro, your mother slash big sister is getting bullied here!" If I'm both your little brother and their little brother, then what the hell am I!? How does this twisted family work!?
I sigh. "I actually think it might be good if Arcueid attended school." And the stars return to the vampire's eyes. "Just think about it Senpai, maybe school could actually turn this princess into a functional member of society." It is the job of a school in the first place.
Ciel pauses for a moment, thinking of my proposal. "That's... not the worst idea to ever reach my ears." She squints her eyes in Arcueid's direction. "Actually, it might be even a good idea, as long as someone keeps watch on her." Wow, I actually convinced Senpai of something so absurd!? Maybe I should get on my knees and propose something else right now!
Arcueid shrugs. "Eh, I don't wanna go to school anymore." Both my face and Ciel's twist in shock. "I mean, if this fake teen over here thinks it's a good idea, then I think it's a bad one. It's just that simple." You're also a fake teen! I... I'm also a fake teen! We are basically fake teen society over here, so don't judge Senpai!
Ciel's eye twitches. "Shut up. Aren't you ancient anyways? Don't even try to compare me to you." Of that there is no denial. Arcueid just shrugs however, proving that she only cares for something, as long as it annoys Ciel.
Kohaku giggles. "Well, having our supposed mom follow us to school would be a bit awkward anyways... It's already weird enough that we are supposed third years when our big brother is a second year student." Both of you are older than me, please don't forget that.
Then Kohaku sends me a glare out of nowhere. "By the way, isn't my esteemed elder brother forgetting about something?" Yeah, I forgot how I apparently was born before you two. I wonder who erased a few years out of my mind...? Actually considering my real age, I really could be a big brother.
Still, I should seriously think about what Kohaku is trying to say, so I put my mind to work. It doesn't take much time for me to notice a blushing Hisui on the background and connect the dots, of course Kohaku would be mad about this...
I send my shy younger, older sister a thumbs up. "You're looking great Hisui! It's taking all my willpower to not ask for your hand in marriage again." I wonder how my bank account will survive once I marry all of my future harem?
Hisui blushes red, as always it's not really noticeable if you don't pay attention, but it is there. "Thank you Elder Brother." It feels weird how she didn't make any comment about the marriage thing... Is Hisui into me!? Another thing for me to think about...
Well, they did insert themselves as family, which kinda kills the romance angle. That said, Rika also said I copied their abilities because of love... Except it was the same thing with Shiki, and I'm fairly sure he doesn't want to clash the Shiki train with the Yuta train. So that love could be just platonic.
In the end I guess I'll just follow along with my usual shenanigans without escalating things. Besides, I'm pretty sure that if I decided to become too flirty with Hisui she would get more scared than anything else.
Rika crosses her arms suddenly, she's giving me a flat stare. "Hey Yuta... Do you happen to like high schoolers or something? You are praising the twins an awful lot, and if Rabbit wasn't Rabbit I'm pretty sure she would have stolen your heart..." Please stop underestimating Senpai, specially when she already stole my heart anyways.
Kohaku then tilts her head. "Actually I'm curious too. Big bro pervs on anything that exists, but what is he actually into?" A grin reaches her face. "Should I expect you to jump on a middle schooler?" I shall not introduce you to Miyako.
Hisui shakes her head. "I do not believe this is a conversation we should be pursuing Honored Sister." A small blush appears on her face again. "Something like this is very, very personal..." True, but I'm fine with sharing!
I put my hands on my hips, puff my chest and proudly declare my tastes. "I love cute girls! That's my fetish! Bunny girls, maids, teachers, students, knights, elfs, dominating women and submissive women! I love them all! As long as a girl has unshakeable character she has a chance with me!" Why do I suddenly expect to be called boring by an idol fan?
Ciel is the first one to react, blushing a cute bright red that contrasts with her hair. "Y-Yuta, it's not like I'm particularly against a bit of perversion, but please don't state your thoughts out loud like that!" I was asked to do it though.
Rika makes a thinking pose. "How do I go about eliminating every women in the world that has unshakeable character...?" It's a impossible task, so please give up on it. Actually for Rika it might be doable... Scary, I shouldn't talk about my preferences ever again.
Arcueid makes a thinking pose. "Incredible, Yuta has said so much, and yet so little. As expected of my genius little brother, no one is as good at picking up women as him." Ah, you know it's bad when even Arcueid is calling me out on my lukewarm answer.
And if Arcueid can see it, obviously Kohaku can as well. "Yeah, mom is totally right." Do not call Arcueid mom. "What's up with your weak answer Big Bro? You might as well have said your type is 'women'." It is though! I didn't lie! "Honestly I would expect this answer from someone like Shiki, not from you!" Why? I'm definitely the guy who would give out this type of answer.
Hisui interject. "L-like I said before Honored Sister, we shouldn't pressure Elder Brother." She looks down. "Even if his answer was indeed weak..." Ah, even Hisui has abandoned me! Next thing you know Senpai will mock me as well.
Ciel having recovered from her embarrassment, mocks me as well. "Yep. A answer that came straight from a playboy. For his next move, he's gonna tell me I'm the only one for him." She sighs. "Seriously Yuta, you need to have more confidence when speaking of your tastes..." Weren't you the one that said I should watch what I say though!?
Ciel pushes her glasses up. "Please accept this favor from your glasses buddy Yuta. Women like men who know what they want, by the way, my favorite food is curry in case you didn't know." How does that relate to the conversation at all!?
Rika sighs. "Trust me Rabbit, we know. That's all we ever eat after all..." That's true, ever since I started living with Senpai, curry has become the standard food. That said, Ciel does change the menu occasionally! For example, sometimes she buys pre-prepared curry instead of making it herself! End me.
Hisui is contorting in pain on the background, while she does that, Kohaku enters the conversation again. "Honestly, you could ask us to cook sometimes Ciel... Well ask for me to cook." That cute blush of Hisui returns at her sister's remark.
Arcueid excitedly claps her hands. "Oh! I want to try my daughter's cooking!" She then makes a thinking pose. "Though I don't want to share such privileges with Ciel..." Please stop bullying Senpai. "Oh well, sometimes you gotta feed the stray dogs."
Ciel immediately snaps back at her. "This is my house, you're the stray here!" True, though that applies to many more people than just Arcueid... Senpai truly is a saint, Jeanne d'Arc has been surpassed by this girl who also happens to be French.
Kohaku however, ignores their bickering. Probably because she wishes to keep her sanity. "Okay then! I'm cooking tonight, so just say what you want for dinner Ciel!" Noooooo! Why did you give my Senpai such power!?
Ciel sends my foolish sister a bright smile, it's so beautiful I almost forget she's about to doom us all. "Oh, just cook your favorite food for today. I'm sure I'll enjoy whatever you make Kohaku." What...? Have I died and shifted into an alternate reality!?
Immediately I rush to Senpai's side. "Leave my future wife alone you weird little piloting alien!" I can only assume one such creature has taken control of her brain. No, I'm sure that even if that happened, Ciel's spirit would fight back.
My Senpai awkwardly smiles. "W-when did I become your future wife?" From the moment you were born. "Also... what?" You cannot choose to be confused by my actions, you litte curry monsters.
Kohaku giggles. "Geez, Yuta overreacted so quickly that I couldn't do it as well. By the way, did an alien take over your mind Ciel?" I see my sister may be late, but she will at least show up. A good quality, when I was young, if I was late to school, I would just say fuck it and skip it. Young me was unbelievably based.
Ciel pouts. "You guys are judging me way too much for this. What's the problem with eating curry everyday?" Technically there isn't any problem with it, but it disturbs my soul nonetheless.
Kohaku takes a moment to think. "So Ciel's preferences aside... What's your favorite food Yuta? Today I decided that I want to cook for you!" Wow, what a amazing dream has just appeared before me. Getting to eat a girl's home cooked meals is a classic! Though I have admittedly being experiencing that with Ciel for a long while now, and Rika occasionally cooks too.
Still... "Don't worry about me Kohaku. Remember what Senpai told you? Just cook whatever you prefer... Also, Hisui please watch out for your sister, we don't need anything weird on the food." To that, the ex-maid gives a serious nod. I'm glad we all understand that Breaking Bad has ended.
Kohaku pouts. "So little trust..." Her eyes change for a second. "I don't really have any favorite food, so I would like to try out whatever Big Bro likes." I see, in that case there is only one option available...
"My favorite food is Kohaku." Everyone silently stares at me, though the girl in question is grinning. So I can only lower my head in shame. "Sorry, I've been holding back my perversion for so long now that it came out by accident." Like a balloon popping.
Rika sends me a thumbs up. "That's fine Yuta! To be honest we would have been more weirded out if you didn't say anything perverted." I really took the Rudeus route in life didn't I? Should I expect to get sued for copyright any time soon?
Kohaku sends me a knowing look. "Well, I could cover myself in chantilly..." Ah I see. Kohaku is definitely into me at least! I may be too dense to sus out whether the same applies to Hisui, but even I can't ignore this.
And I'm totally okay with it. "That sounds like the best thing ever!" I don't want to push Kohaku towards anything, specially with her past, but if she's offering... Then I am totally fine with devouring her, so to speak.
Arcueid interjects, her face is now covered with terror. "Hey! Hey! Unless I am misunderstanding something, why are you guys talking about eating my daughter!?" Ah, I forgot this stupidly cute princess can be strangely innocent sometimes. Though in my defense, she did try to drag me into a love hotel in our date.
Rika sighs. "They are not talking about eating people Bimbocuied." The vampire tilts her head in confusion, so Rika elaborates. "It's a sexual thing. One where the girl covers her body with chantilly and the guy licks it off... It's actually kind of a pain to do in my experience, but maybe it's because my body has a weird shape." Yep, not trying that again anytime soon.
While Arcueid nods in understanding, Ciel covers her red face. "Too much information!" Hisui quickly nods in the background, her blush is more pronounced than ever. It appears information about my sex life can break through her emotionless facade.
Kohaku grins. "Well, there are other ways to eat a woman..." At that, she receives a frustrated pout from her sister. "Ah, fine... So I will ask again, what do you feel like eating Yuta?" I must resist the temptation to answer Kohaku again! Maybe I could throw a curveball and answer Hisu- No!
With great force of will, I say the truth... I mean, the truth that they want to hear. "I like strogonoff... Though I'm not sure we actually have the ingredients for that." I send Ciel a teasing smile. "Actually we might only have ingredients for curry..." Senpai is an amazing type of person.
Kohaku hums. "That's true... How about we just go buy some then? It's not like it's super late or anything." There's a strange look in her face. "Just going to the supermarket huh... How weird." I feel like I can't ever quite comprehend what she's feeling right now.
Hisui might however, so she speaks up. "Yeah, let's go Honored Sister. Me, you and Elder Brother." Well, I guess I better get ready for the weird looks from strangers... Then again, I guess them being my siblings isn't as ludicrous as Arcueid being my older sister.
Speaking of the vampire, she raises a hand. "Okay then! I'm going too! I can't let my daughters leave at the dead of night without supervision, who knows what sort of weirdo might pop-up!?" Please remind yourself that you did not adopt these two.
Ciel sighs. "If the vampire is going, so am I. I can't let her roam around unsupervised." She always does that though. "I got the feeling this idiot might try to show off since Hisui and Kohaku are going..." True, she will probably act like a stereotypical teen trying to impress her dumb friends.
Rika sighs. "So Rabbit is going too? Seriously so many people just to buy some ingredients... Ah, I'm going too obviously." I don't think anyone here expected otherwise.
Hisui smiles, slowly she walks towards me. "Thanks Elder Brother." Something touches my hand, it's for a very brief moment, but it was surely Hisui. My little sister tried touching a man, and she succeeded for a second.
And now there's a bright smile on her face. Not a look of terror, a genuine smile. "I hope this dream never ends." Geez, don't say embarrassingly cute stuff like that when people are watching... You'll make me blush damn it.
I send her a smile in return. "This ain't a dream in the first place. So don't worry, it's not ending any time soon." Today my cute little sister touched my hand, for but one second.
One day we will definitely hold hands.
AN: When I was teen, one time I dreamed I was going to Pokémon school. I had only got three hours of sleep that day, and I woke up like such a zombie, that I didn't realize pokémons weren't real until I got to school.
This has nothing to do with the story, I just didn't know what to write here.