Chapter Sixteen

A Safe Place to Fall

"They shouldn't have called you," Maria complained, looking past my shoulder to frown at her worried children. "I told them not to. I'm fine." Her fingers plucked restlessly at the crisp whiteness of the hospital sheets.

"Ah, Mama…" Miguel, her youngest son complained, spreading his hands wide in protest. "We had to." He looked to his four siblings for support, and they all nodded. "You've already said you're not going to stay with any of us."

"Because I don't want to be a burden," his mother replied.

"Who was the woman who told me not so long ago that I must do as my doctors instructed?" I asked mildly, sitting on the side of the bed to take her hand between mine. "You will do as you are told and like it."

"You too?" Her dark eyes speared me with sharp reproof. "I thought I could count on you to be on my side."

"And you can," I replied steadily. "But you've broken both your wrist and your arm. You've also got a very nasty bruise on your head. I'm just so glad it wasn't worse. You need to lie back and allow us to take care of you for a while."

"I know I've ruined your holiday…" Maria's gaze slid past me to Devon, who was standing behind me, watching our interaction. "I'm sorry for that."

"Don't be," I replied quickly, shaking my head. "It was almost over anyway."

"It went… well?" She raised her eyebrows at me, her gaze still assessing Devon with speculation. "He is good to you. For you?"

"Stop fishing, Maria," I told her, feeling my cheeks warming. "We're here to talk about you and what we're going to do to get you home."

"That good, huh?" My forthright friend smiled knowingly. "You'll have to tell me all about it sometime." She glanced at Devon again. "I'll say he's a really good-looking man. Much better than that Ian."

I smiled as I stood up, avoiding her ongoing speculation. "The doctors say you can come home with me as long as you agree to take it easy. You have a bad concussion, and you must promise not to overdo things."

"I want to get out of this place. I've been here too long already." She pulled a discontented face. "They don't do anything right." She frowned at her children again.

"All right." I sighed even as I couldn't help smiling at her discontent. She always detested being anything less than her usual forthright self. "I'll go and see the nurse about paying the bill –" I raised my hand when Maria opened her mouth to protest. "– and you won't argue with me. It's the least I can do."

"Very well…" She subsided unwillingly, knowing it was the only way she was going to be able to leave this room. "But I will pay you back every last cent."

Devon took my hand, giving me his silent support as I said, "I'll go and open up the house and make sure everything's ready for you. Then we'll be back. You'll be home in time for dinner."

"That can't come soon enough." Maria sighed, nodding her agreement.

She divided her gaze between us. "So, you're staying with us?" she asked Devon.

"That's the general idea," he replied neutrally.

"Good, good. Then I'll look forward to getting to know you better." Maria nodded with satisfaction as she watched us leave the room.

"I can see you'll have your hands full with her," Devon said as we approached the nurse's station. "It's just as well I'm here. I won't allow her to stress you out."

"Yes…" I hugged his arm. "But she'll try her best not to. I'm afraid Maria's going to be as fractious as a two-year-old child. It's in her nature. She's always hated not being in control and the one in charge."

"That much is obvious." Devon shook his head ruefully as the nurse hurried up to see what we wanted.

※※※※※

I carried our bags inside the house. Then I walked around Carolyn's home, helping her open the curtains and windows to let in the sunlight and warm desert air.

I didn't truly know what to expect, but this charming house exceeded my imaginings. It was rustic and sprawling, a beautiful Spanish style and it was crammed full of her personality. Her tastes were eclectic because of the number of interesting collectables that took up every available space and the brightly coloured paintings that hung on the cream-coloured walls. The main lounge was decorated with Mexican wall hangings and colourful woven blankets draped over the furniture.

"I like colour," she said to me when she saw me looking at it all. "I made sure I changed all the locks and then redecorated everything after Ian left. He liked things plain and bland. I make no apology for loving my new house as it is now."

"And nor should you," I replied quickly. "This is your home. Where else can you be yourself?"

"Thank you…" She seemed satisfied with my response. "The bedrooms are this way…" She led me from the main part of the house and down a long wide hallway. "You can have the main guest room. It's next to mine."

She didn't meet my eyes as she opened the door to a large, charming room furnished in the same colourful style as the rest of the house. She stood aside for me to enter and put my bags on the large wooden chest that stood at the end of the bed.

She came close to place her palms flat on my chest. "I'm sorry we can't be alone like we were back at the lodge in Sedona," she said with real regret. "This wasn't how I was expecting our holiday to end."

"I don't think either of us had any real idea about how it was going to end," I replied gently, taking her hands in mine and kissing her palm. "Maria needs you right now and I wouldn't be anywhere else but here."

"But you have to get your photographs organised for your exhibit," she worried. "They won't develop and frame themselves, you know."

I smiled at her frowning concern. "Don't worry, I now have an agency to do that for me. I'll mail them the rolls of film tomorrow. They can take care of the rest. Then I can spare another few weeks before I must get back to Montecito to see a man about a house. Then I'll be flying out to London. But all of that can wait while you need me to be here."

I drew her closer with my hands at her waist. "You are the only one I want to care about right now. You and Maria."

"Thank you…" She reached up to kiss me lingeringly. "I am very glad you're here. It won't be easy."

"I know that…" I nodded with my lips against hers. "That is why I am staying."

I traced the line of her jaw with my fingers cupping her cheeks and she surrendered to my need to take care of her with a breathy sigh of longing.

※※※※※

Three weeks later:

"If I didn't know better, Mr Devon Miles, I would say you're nothing but a great, big cheat!" Maria said sternly, throwing down her cards in disgust.

"Blame it on a misspent youth." Devon shrugged as he humoured her. "My father was a gifted card sharp."

I smiled as I looked up from a portfolio of Devon's photographic work. The pair of them had been playing poker for most of the last three weeks and neither was prepared to give an inch. Devon made no allowance for Maria's healing injuries, and she respected him for that.

I was the one who fussed. I couldn't help it. It was the mothering instinct in me. Maria was healing well and no longer needed my close attention, but I still hovered watchfully.

I'd managed to complete the first draft of my new Edward Grainer novel where he had an exciting adventure trying to solve a new murder while on a much-needed holiday in Sedona. Devon had contributed some intriguing insights into the devious mind of a master criminal that I'd never known about before.

His thoughts and comments added a new and edgy dimension that I just knew my readers were going to love. I offered to put his name to the trilogy as the co-author, but he smiled and said he was happy to remain anonymous as my ghostwriter. I kissed him and told him how much I loved him.

I smiled across at him now, wishing we could be alone and knowing the guilt of such a forlorn need. I was very pleased with my new work, even if Devon featured in it more than I realised. After some thought, I decided to leave it that way. Devon had irrevocably become Edward Grainger and there was no turning back now. I couldn't visualise my hero in any other way.

I had just begun the second draft, but I'd made little headway with it, becoming more and more distracted by Devon's ongoing presence in my house. As the days turned into weeks I began to lose concentration, having my real-life hero so close and so very touchable. I ached to be in his arms again and from his many glances, I knew he agreed.

As a much-needed distraction, Devon had asked his agency to send us a portfolio of his works. They also said they'd recently secured a lucrative deal with a popular national magazine to showcase some of his more recent photographs.

"These are truly amazing…" I marvelled now at each photograph as I slowly turned the heavy pages.

Devon's eye for detail was breathtaking. He smiled at me. "You could become famous if any of the photos I took of you back in Sedona are approved for publication in the magazine."

"You're forgetting that I'm already famous!" I reminded him with a saucy grin, pointing to the nearby bookcase full of my novels in both hardcover and paperback. "I'm on the back of every single one."

"Fair point." He grinned at me, and I sighed.

I missed being held by him as I fell asleep. And when I woke up to find him watching me like I was a puzzle he was determined to solve. The thought made my bare toes curl with frustrated desire. I changed my position and tucked my legs beneath me, trying to look cool and collected. But I doubted I was fooling anyone.

We were all seated in the warmth of the main lounge. The sun had gone down on another fine, late winter's day and I longed to take a walk in the fresh air now the evening was cooler.

Devon heard my sigh and frowned at me in concern. Maria got to her feet and planted her good hand on her hip.

"Go on and take her out, Devon," my very forthright housekeeper commanded. "Somewhere you can get a drink and a good meal. I don't want to see either of you for the rest of the night."

"Oh, but I –" I protested.

Maria immediately held up a denying hand. "No buts, oh, dears or maybes. I mean it. I may have been ordered to take it easy, but you two don't. Get out and have some fun."

"It does sound like a great plan…" Devon rose to his feet.

I felt I was being ganged up on. Both stared at me with determination.

"There's a great bar and grill just a couple of blocks away," Maria encouraged. "Carolyn knows the way. She used to go there all the time."

I frowned. "I haven't been back there in ages. Not since Ian and I left the city for LA." I didn't need reminding.

"All right." Maria shrugged. "Then it's way past time you get reacquainted with the place. It serves excellent food, and you deserve a night out. Go on now before I lose my temper with the pair of you."

I put aside the folder and got out of my chair to hug her carefully, pulling back to look at her. "Only if you're sure…" I looked down at my colourful Mexican peasant blouse and long flowing skirt. "I'm not exactly dressed to go out for dinner." I knew Ian wouldn't have approved.

My good friend walked toward me. "Rubbish, you look fine to me. And it's about time you stopped worrying about what that ex-husband of yours thinks. He's not around anymore."

Maria put her hand on my cheek. "I don't think I can take watching you two mope around each other for much longer." She pulled me closer to whisper, "Something's gotta give…" She stared at me significantly before turning her eyes in Devon's direction.

"We don't mope," I protested. "We're here to look after you. I thought we were doing a good job of it too."

"Then prove me wrong," Maria replied stoutly, taking me by the shoulder and turning me toward the door. "Go out and have a good time. I'll be fine on my own. I'll have a light supper and go to bed. I'm tired of losing at cards. Good night."

She left the room and the argument, shutting the door behind her. She knew I couldn't dispute her claim if she wasn't in the same room with us.

I turned to look at Devon. He'd collected up the cards and had put them back in their box. He tilted his head at me in inquiry. "Shall we?" he asked softly. "Shall we play truant once again, Luciana?" He knew those words would melt the last of my faltering resolve.

"I would like to go out," I admitted honestly. "It is such a lovely night. But I really should go and get changed."

"Then consider it done. And you look fine to me." His blue eyes caressed me, lingering on the low-cut neckline of my blouse. "I really like this look. It suits you. Now, stop arguing and go and get your coat and put some shoes on. I'm taking you out and it's my treat because you paid last time."

"All right…" I shrugged, knowing it was useless to argue when he'd already made up his mind to take care of me again.

※※※※※

The Mexican/American bar and grill was already filling up when we arrived. Devon found us a recently vacated booth and I sat down while he went to order our drinks from the bar.

I sat looking around, curious to see anyone I knew. But it had been many months since I'd last been in here and most of the patrons were strangers. I leaned back and absorbed the colourful atmosphere as I watched Devon at the bar. The gorgeous sight of him in his tailored jeans and white shirt made my mouth water and my mind wander.

I sighed. "If only we could be alone in the house…" I missed falling asleep in his arms and I—

"Carolyn?" a man's voice suddenly asked from beside me. "I thought that was you. God, it's been ages."

I frowned as I turned my head, and my blood ran cold. "Ian?" I gasped, not sure if I was seeing a ghost. "I… what are you doing here? Why aren't you in New York?"

'Why aren't you where you're supposed to be? Far away from me with your latest nubile young woman on your arm?'

"I've finally finished with New York. It took longer than I expected." Ian shook his head. "It's damned good to see you. I was hoping I'd run into you on this trip back here to the old town. I heard you'd returned from LA a few months ago."

I stared up at him. He'd always been a handsome man, but now he looked older and rather bitter. His face had more lines and there were more streaks of grey in his dark hair.

I shook my head. "Well, I'm not happy to see you. We have nothing more to say to each other." From the corner of my eye, I saw Devon turning toward us with our drinks in his hands.

He frowned at my ex-husband, and he also saw my stiff discontent. He was very protective of me, and I feared what he might do to Ian if they crossed paths.

I shook my head pleadingly in his direction and he didn't approach any further. But he didn't back off either. He walked to a nearby table and sat down to watch us closely. I was glad because he gave me the courage to face Ian one last time.

Ian shrugged away my dismissal. "Hear me out. You certainly owe me that much. I'm back here for a final business meeting. Tying up some loose ends before I head back to LA for good."

He eased into the booth opposite me. I was grateful he didn't try to sit next to me. "I'm expanding the business and going nationwide later this year. I was thinking of calling at the house to see you. We've got a lot to discuss."

He looked me over critically. "You're looking well. Very well, indeed." He flicked a dismissive hand at my blouse and skirt. "Though I do prefer you in one of those power suits you used to like wearing, or an evening gown. You look like you're wearing something Maria gave you."

I inhaled sharply at the casual insult. "So, New York worked out for you then?"

"Yes and no. I found the financing I needed after you…" He grimaced. "Well, you know what happened. I had to cover my losses after the divorce. It wasn't easy. But I finally got what I wanted. I made them see it my way."

He frowned at me; his dark brown eyes deeply speculative. "But, what about you? You're all alone here? Or are you reliving the past?" He looked around. "You must remember when we used to come here all the time."

Beneath the table his knee pushed suggestively against mine, moving slowly between my knees and toward my inner thigh. "I want you back," he said then. "I've given you enough time to think about what you did to us. I can forgive you for that."

I gasped, not quite believing his arrogance. "As I said, I don't think we have anything more to say to each other," I replied in a disinterested tone. "We said it all nearly two years ago." I turned sideways and pressed my knees together, avoiding any more unwanted under the table contact.

"Yeah, but that was then." Ian sought to take my hand in his, but I avoided that as well. "Look, I've had a lot of time to think too. We used to be so good together. We just got turned around somehow. I blame all that sappy romance stuff you were writing. It isn't real life, you know."

He shook his head as he warmed to his theme. "We can't go throwing away thirty-five years of marriage on a silly whim. I know I did wrong, but I can promise you I'm a changed man. Melissa's no longer in my life. I've been far too busy."

He studied the bare ring finger of my left hand. "I'll admit I was shocked and angry when you filed for divorce without asking me first. Then there's our kids. Surely their future happiness counts for something. I'm sure they'd love to see us get back together."

He smiled. "I miss you, Carolyn. I guess I've never really gotten over you leaving me. I really do want you back. On your terms, of course," he added hastily when he saw my frowning expression. "Look, I'm staying for a few days with Grant Foreman before I go back to LA. He told me you'd come back here to live. You know his number. Phone me there when you come to your senses. You know you won't get a better deal."

He looked me up and down. "You do need to think about it seriously. You're not getting any younger."

"I don't need to think about it, Ian…" I shook my head, well aware of what he wanted. "Our children are all adults. They know their own minds. And they saw through you years ago. I was the one who was stupid enough to think you actually loved me. You don't know what that is."

I knew he needed an attractive, intelligent wife in his corporate life. He'd never appreciated that fact. Now that he was planning on expanding his software company. Taking his latest loose woman to business dinners was not a good look. He needed me back in his life as his sophisticated wife and bookkeeper.

The thought of getting back with him made my blood run even colder. "I have no intention of remarrying you. It was over long before I threw you out. Now, if you'll excuse me…" I stood up and turned to walk away.

"Hey! We haven't finished talking." Ian stood up and grabbed for my arm as I passed him. "You haven't listened to what I've got to say. I've got a great deal I can offer you, you know. You can come and go as you please. Do your writing or whatever. I won't interfere or try to stop you and—"

"Let her go!" Devon was out of his seat in an instant, menace and rage evident in every line of his demeanour as he crossed the floor to snatch Ian's grip from my arm. He imposed his powerful body between us and I was grateful.

Ian glared at him. "Hey, pal, back off! This is between me and her. Get lost before I make you."

"I'm staying," Devon replied levelly, staring back at him.

"Look here, you…" Ian bristled, trying to shake off Devon's iron grip on his wrist.

Then his face fell into shocked disbelief. "You!" I could see he understood immediately that he was looking at Edward's father.

"Ah, so that's it, is it?" He turned to glare at me. "That's why you left me. For him! I just knew all along that Edward was never mine. You just couldn't admit it. You knew what you'd be losing if you ever told me the truth."

He sneered as his thin veneer of civility fell away. "You and your precious secrets. I should have known all along. You're nothing but a two-timing bitch!" His eyes were blazing with disgust. "So much for all your fine talk about my affairs! Has this guy been hanging around here all along? Is that why you're back here? To take up where you left off."

"Keep your voice down," Devon hissed, tightening his grip on Ian's wrist and making him whimper in pain.

"You're hurting me," Ian protested, plucking uselessly at Devon's powerful fingers. "She isn't worth it. She never was."

Devon leaned closer to him. "You'll have more than a bruised wrist to worry about if you ever come near Carolyn again. I'll make you wish you were dead!" His quiet, stark words held a wealth of menace.

"Okay, okay…" Ian blanched as he swallowed tightly. Devon let him go.

Ian massaged his abused wrist with his other hand. He glanced around at those patrons who were taking an interest in our argument. Several had stood up to intervene and then thought better of it when they saw the look on Devon's face.

"You will apologise to Carolyn for your crass behaviour," Devon demanded in a low tone.

I saw Ian's face pale with contempt. "I…" He swallowed tightly, not daring to disobey. "All right. I'm sorry, Carolyn," he said grudgingly. "My mistake."

Devon shook his head. "Not much of an apology but it will have to do."

"Look, you don't understand," Ian pleaded. "Like I said, this is between me and her." He flicked a hand in my direction. "It's none of your business. I'm the one she married, not you."

"Leave…" Devon said, in a lethally quiet tone. "Leave now. While you can still walk out of here."

"I…" Ian looked around but found no support in any of the crowd watching us. He hunched his shoulders. "All right, I'm going. You're welcome to her. She always was a cold-hearted bitch and I—"

He fled beneath the menace of Devon's single step forward in his direction. The street door slammed shut behind him and he was gone.

Until that moment, I didn't realise I was shaking with a mixture of fury and dismay. Devon took my arm gently and guided me back to my seat. He fetched our drinks from the other table and the crowd around us went back to their own business after giving several nods of masculine approval.

"Maybe we should just go home," I said as Devon pushed my drink into my hands. "This was a bad idea. He could still come back."

"No, Carolyn," he replied steadily. "We came out to have a quiet drink and a meal and to enjoy ourselves. We are going to do just that."

He slid into the booth beside me and put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me close. "We will not give that craven coward another thought."

"All right…" I sighed as I sipped my drink to calm my nerves. Its warmth began to spread through me. "You did hurt his pride, you know. He hated that."

"Good. I'll telephone Michael in the morning and ask him to look into Ian's business affairs. No doubt there's dirt."

I frowned. "Do you think that's wise? It will only make him angrier if he finds out."

"I've found in this world it pays to be prepared. Ian will think twice about coming anywhere near you again if he knows we're watching him." He kissed my cheek and looked down at me. "Feeling better?"

"Mmmm, much…" I nestled against him, resting my cheek into the hollow of his shoulder.

It truly did feel like I was coming home all over again. I pushed my ex-husband to the back of my mind where he belonged.

I felt Devon's chest rise and fall as he seemed to be debating something. Something important and vital. 'Stay with me…' I wanted to say. 'Don't go back to LA…' But I couldn't say the words. London was half a world away.

"I have to go back to Montecito in a few days. I can't stay any longer. Come with me, Luciana…" he said then, cutting across my thoughts. "Please…"

He put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me slightly away from him so he could look down into my face. His blue eyes were shadowed and pleading.

"Because of Ian?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to hear his answer. "I can handle him. Though I doubt he will dare to bother me again. Not after tonight."

"No, not because of Ian." Devon shook his head slowly. "Because I want you to come with me." He kissed me gently and reverently. "Because I love you and I can no longer imagine my life without you in it. I want you now and for all our tomorrows. I've been a fool not to ask you before now."

I could see what the heartfelt confession had cost him. He had laid bare his innermost wish. The same wish that had been tormenting us both for the last few weeks. How could I be anything less than honest with him?

"All right…" I nodded. "I'll go back with you. There's nothing here for me without you."

It was as easy as that. No more, no less. I felt him sag against me as he gathered me into his arms once more, pressing a kiss to my hair.

"Thank God," he whispered. "I don't know what I would have done if you'd said no."

"Me neither…" I hugged him tightly and smiled against the steady beat of his generous heart. "I love you so much, Devon Miles. Too much to ever dream of losing you again."

I shook my head slowly. "I think it's about time we finally let Schrödinger's blasted cat out of its box. It's been stuck in there long enough and it must be exhausted from trying to fight its way out."

"Yes…" Devon laughed softly and hugged me even tighter with relief. "I do love you, my beautiful Luciana."

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