Authors notes: A reviewer said the Doctor was a bit too nicey-nicey. Well, you ain't seen nothing yet. ;)
I've spent a lot of thought on how this chapter ends. So I hope everyone likes it.
As I post this, I've noticed that the story has 666 views. Given what Raven is supposed to be I don't know if that's a good or a bad omen. lol
Chapter 12
I don't fear the Monsters.
The Doctor was sat in thought on the floor having emptied his pockets, which carried quite a lot of things. His Sonic Screwdriver, a ball of string, a bag of jelly babies, several devices she had no hope of understanding the use of. Several books, a piece of wire, a box of drawing-pins, a deck of cards. She barely had time to list all the things before he began pocketing them again, except for one book called 'Inter-galactic monsters, and what to do about them. By Ford Prefect.'
He quickly flipped through the book at lightning speed before pocketing it again. Surely the Doctor hadn't just read that entire book?
"This creature is a new life form" the Doctor concluded, "Like how life began on your planet in the sea by the formation and gradual combination of amino acids over billions of years, this creature formed presumably in a similar way but in a different medium. Some kind of self assembling molecule similar to DNA, and like DNA it's evolving. It's learning and it could be gaining reasoning powers." the Doctor snapped his fingers "And for some reason it doesn't like those glowing rocks. Something about the light hurts it." the Doctor thought, "A type of radiation that damages its structure the same way your DNA doesn't care for Alpha, Beta and Theta radiation."
"Isn't that a leap?" Raven questioned.
"When you travel around as much as I do you realise that science tends to form patterns." the Doctor pocketed the book, "but don't take that idea to heart. Some people like to see patterns in things that aren't there."
"And what if 'you' are seeing a pattern in something that isn't there?" she questioned.
The Doctor paused and looked at her as if such an idea were impossible, and said "Well, then I shall simply admit I was mistaken." A sensible response, Raven decided, why do I get the feeling he never does.
The Doctor walked past her one arm across his chest propping the other arm up as it rested against his chin as he thought.
"The Shaydes are a danger to these people." he reasoned, "They want to be on top of the food chain like Morlocks." Raven didn't understand the reference. "But there is a way to defeat and contain them again. We trick or force them back into the well, or make our own containment system." He checked his pocket watch, "Which we don't have enough time I fear, so the well it is."
"Now, this is the tricky bit." the Doctor said, "We need to convince the locals to help us."
Raven remained silent.
"You're supposed to ask 'how do we do that, Doctor?'"
"This is going to be something silly, isn't it?" Raven guessed.
"Don't knock it, it's worked before."
Raven now sat at the top of a building opposite the square. The Doctors plan was to pretend to be a good wizard from the Northern Tribes, and he was hunting a great evil. But to impress the locals the Doctor needed to show off some powers, powers he didn't have.
"That's where you come in" he had said, "I'll shout out what I'm going to do, and you make it happen."
"Wouldn't it be simpler if I'm there doing it?" Raven asked.
"You've upset these people enough already with your brain drain; Yes, I worked out what you did and I'm very disappointed." the Doctor said. Like she cared. "You have the diplomatic nature of a Cyberman." Raven felt a twinge because the Doctor was right, but having it pointed out to her did stir up her emotions a little. "What these people need is a little theatre."
"And I need my head examined for going through with this." Raven said.
"That's the spirit" the Doctor said, hearing but ignoring her comment, and now here they were. Raven up on the roof tops ready to make the Doctor look good with 'her' powers.
He stood on a platform in the middle of the square and called out.
"Ladies, Gentleman, or gentle-beings." they never did find out if they were a binary species or not. "I am the great and good wizard Qui-Quy-Quad!"
"What?!" Raven exclaimed out loud. What idiot had dreamt that name up? You're probably looking at him, she thought. A small part of her wanted to laugh, but it stayed down where it belonged.
"I am from the Northern Tribes. I have travelled far, seeking a great evil. Now is the eve of its evil plot. But I cannot defeat this creature by myself. To save your town I require your aid." A crowd had gathered and there were the usual murmurings of disbelief. "Perhaps you wish me to show a demonstration of my power." and the Doctor held up his hand and that was Raven's cue.
She saw a vase of flowers in the bedroom of a nearby house. Using her powers she teleported them from the bedroom and into the Doctors hand. The crowd were impressed, and the Doctor handed them down to a person in his audience. Raven couldn't help but express her displeasure with this plan by instantly causing the flowers to wilt and die after they were out of the Doctors hands.
"Oh, I do beg your pardon" the Doctor said, and shot Raven a look which said 'Stop it, you're not helping!'
"Now, perhaps something more impressive," and the Doctor began waving his hands around in front of him. Raven was tempted to just let him stand there and make a fool of himself, but she blew air out of her lungs in a big sigh. Try to be nice, she told herself, and she said her chimes and drew on her power. A ball of magical energy formed near the Doctors hands. The crowd was impressed. The Doctor spread his hands wide and the dark energy formed into a spinning disk. Raven ignored the way the Doctor moved his hands, he was doing it all wrong, you can't control dark energy like that, he'd blast his face off. Of course, Raven did it properly, trying to make it appear the Doctor was in control, not her. She should've taught him some of the hand gestures because she could see him as the fraud he was. There's one hand gesture I'd like to give him, she thought.
The Doctor flicked his arms up and Raven pulled the black energy into the air. Shrugging, she decided to get creative and let the energy explode out in a loud expression of colour and energy before forcing all the colours to re-combine into a black sphere near the Doctor. He reached out to grab the ball and Raven let the energy collapse. It looked like the Doctor had grabbed the ball, held it in his hands and as he opened his long fingers to show it was gone.
Raven lent forwards in her sitting position and rested her face in her right hand. What a waste of her powers. The people were impressed though. Too easily impressed by that fraud, she thought. She guessed it didn't matter if she could see through it, as long as the locals believed it. Wait, was she actually feeling jealous of the praise he was getting? No, I'm not! She thought, yes you are. "Shut up!" Raven grumbled.
As more people gathered, the Doctor again launched into a speech about the danger they were in. He demonstrated some more of 'his powers' for good measure and instructed those who couldn't help to return to their homes and stay. Any wishing to aid him needed to gather as many of the Glow Stones as possible and meet him at the well to fight this evil.
Raven yawned at the speech, but it seemed to have an effect on the locals. Like a magic spell in itself, their attitude shifted and they were ready to help the man who not so long ago they had pelted with fruit.
A villager in finer clothes approached the Doctor. She guessed this was their chief. He challenged the Doctor, and Raven was tempted to use her powers to seal this guys mouth closed. But the Doctor moved to face her direction with the intention of addressing the crowd, he did, but he also shot Raven a look which said to her, 'Raven, don't you dare!' So she didn't. But the chief advanced, ready with a stick to attack the Doctor. Raven, however, was quicker and sealed the Doctor in a bubble of dark energy so the chiefs attacks never even reached him. After that display, the chief seemed satisfied that the Doctor was the genuine article and agreed to help.
That was surprisingly easy. Raven thought. She waited until the right moment where she could meet the Doctor and speak to him. She had to admit his performance had the desired effect and she never expected it to work in a million years. At least, not on her, but she guessed the universe didn't think or act like her. It was pathetic.
When she finally got a moment alone with the Doctor, Raven had cast another shield of perception over herself so the locals ignored her.
"What did you think?" The Doctor asked in a low voice. "Heroic? A touch over the top, maybe?"
"You looked ridiculous." she said.
"It worked once in Devils End, I banked on it working again." the Doctor smiled at Ravens irritated look. "Now, to set a trap. The Shaydes feed off psychic energy, they're drawn to it like moths to a flame. That's why it chased you."
"How did you work that out?" Raven asked.
"Because to drain someones literal life force you feed off of their psychic powers, no matter how small they may be. But since its lasted so long in the well without a psychic boost, I guess it doesn't really need it. It's like a tasty treat the creatures like. It's like kit-kats or crunchy bars to them. We can use that against them and that means, we need a strong source of psychic energy to use as bait." and the Doctor was looking at Raven, and slowly she understood what that look meant.
"No." Raven said "You're not using me as bait."
"You'll be fine," the Doctor said "I promise." the Doctor took her right hand and looped his small finger of his right hand around the small finger of her own right hand. "This is one of your Earth customs to show a promise, right?"
Raven pulled away and crossed her arms over her chest. "There is no way I'm letting you use me as bait!"
How did I let the Doctor talk me into being bait? Raven sighed angrily. Because I am a sucker.
She was standing near the well. The moon was high above her and was nearly shining directly down the well.
The villagers had been busy gathering their own Glow Stones to put in a circle around the well, each circle was unbroken, each rock connecting perfectly to the other, and each Raven was interacting with on a psychic level so they stayed black. The plan was to lead the Shayde creatures into the outer circle, and once each circle was activated from outer to inner the Shaydes would retreat away and hopefully go down the well and Raven would do the rest.
That's the plan as the Doctor put it. But first Raven had to become a beacon of psychic energy. That she was already being by projecting her cloak of perception around her. All they had to do was wait, and hope the Shayde creatures appeared. To help this they took down most of the Glow Stone lanterns in the village, dropping it into almost pitch dark. All the villagers and even the Doctor retreated into hiding. It didn't take long for a Shayde to sniff Raven out and it came directly for her.
It looked like it was cautious at first, sensing a trap; but it slithered in over the inactive stones and it reared up ready to swallow Raven up again. She raised herself up into the air so she was out of its reach, and its reach was pretty long.
Then came another, and another, and another. She could sense them becoming active and they were coming for her. Ten, no Twelve. She could only sense twelve. Twelve that now snapped at her dangling feet. I am not afraid, she said to herself, I am not afraid of them. Her previous encounter still fresh in her mind. If her powers failed now, she was dead. She waited an extra minute in case any more showed up. But it looked like this was all of them.
"NOW!" The Doctor cried and Raven relinquished her concentration on the first circle of stones and they activated. The Shaydes felt pain as they dragged the rest of themselves inside the first Glow Stone circle. Raven, however, could pass beyond the circle no problems leaving the things sealed inside. They tried to jump over the stones, but they hesitated before the actual jump the stones affecting them. She activated the second set of stones and the creatures were herded into the next smaller circle. The small circle within then activated and so on as the Shaydes were forced into the only place they could go. Down the well.
Raven gathered the outer stones up with her power and moved them over the rim of the well, and she fused them together making a ring that narrowed the opening. She did the same with the rest of the stone circles, as each ring was added the opening they could escape through became narrower, and narrower. All the stones turned black as Raven used her powers to pick them up, but reclaimed their shine when Raven released them. They almost had a solid dome of Glow Stones, soon this evil will be sealed away again. But there was a problem. They were a stone short, there was still a hole in the dome, and the Shaydes were reaching out just enough that they could possibly begin to slither back out again like a leak from a dam.
There wasn't another stone on the floor, and if she didn't act fast the creatures would get out and the village would be doomed. Her mind went back to that villager she saw die, and what went through the poor souls head as it fought for its life. Raven imagined that happening a million times over, across the planet.
That she would not allow!
So Raven did the next best thing. Since they couldn't contain them, she decided it best if they were destroyed. They were just monsters after all.
With the moon at her back she used her powers and altered the refractive index of the air in a space above her just enough so that the moon's beams were focused right down into the hole in the well. Like a magnifying glass with sunlight, she focused the light of the moon, like a kid would to burn ants. The Shaydes were screaming and their life force was leaving them. Good, Raven thought, revenge for all those you murdered. This feels... good?! Why is my vision coloured red?
"Raven!" the Doctor cried "No, RAVEN, RAVEN, RAVEN! NO!" but it was too late. She was already committed and no matter how the Doctor screamed she was focused on doing it, ending them. The Doctor had reached up and dragged her down to the ground by her ankles, took her by the shoulders. "STOP!" he screamed and shook her in desperation. "Raven! Stop it, Stop it!" that broke her concentration and her powers snapped off. She realised she had been smiling, a broad smile by the feel of it. What she had done had felt just so good to her.
The beam stopped and the air fell still. The rocks over the deep well collapsed and the interior of the well glowed brightly. The Shaydes had been destroyed.
Raven felt strangely good about herself. She had helped save this planet from the hunger of a beast that would enslave them like cattle. Under her cold exterior, she felt a little glow of pride as the villagers cheered. But the vice-like grip of the Doctors hands on her arms told her something was wrong.
She looked at the Doctor and he looked into her eyes in utter disbelief, or was it horror? What was wrong with him? They'd won. She'd just helped save the planet. The 'evil demon daughter of Trigon' had saved people, not hurt them. Isn't that what he wanted her to do? He gently let her go and stepped away from her. In his hands was another Glow Stone. One she hadn't seen nor sensed. A final one to plug the hole, the lack of which forced her to go all the way with the Shaydes extermination. The Doctor had found one, but just too late to stop her.
As the villagers cheered and what looked like a party was about to erupt in the town Raven felt uncomfortable with the festivities and wanted to leave.
"Can we go now, Doctor?" she asked. But when she looked around the Doctor was already gone. Slinking away down a back alley. He looked... she didn't know what he looked like, but it wasn't like the Doctor.
Raven caught up with the Time Lord as he reached the TARDIS. He was clearly deeply upset by something. She had never seen the Doctor upset before and she searched her brain in case it was anything she had done. We've done nothing, the Doctor is just an emotional fool, her mind told her. Raven set herself down as the Doctor tried to insert the TARDIS key, and Raven removed the block she'd placed on it so the TARDIS doors would open.
Raven didn't like this change in the Doctors character. She didn't know why it bothered her, but she teleported herself in front of the Doctor to prevent him entering the TARDIS and was going to force him to explain himself. "Okay, what's wrong with you?" Raven said bluntly.
The Doctor was not phased and he looked at her with wary, disapproving eyes. She wasn't sure, but she thought she could see him fighting back some anger. Before she could utter another word the Doctor took her roughly by the left arm and forced her into the TARDIS like a disappointed parent would their child.
"Hey, what's with you?" she protested as the door shut on them both. The light on top of the TARDIS began to flash on and off as a wheeze and a groan echoed from the Police Box and it slowly faded out of reality.
The Time Rotor of the TARDIS console wheezed and groaned as it rose and fell.
Raven was happily back in her reading position, hood over her head, digesting her books, and drinking her teas. She should be happy, or content at least. But the problem that drew her out of the TARDIS in the first place still persisted. The Doctor was there, but his usual antics were missing. He operated the TARDIS silently like a moody child who had just been told off.
Raven tried to ignore it. The Doctor was safe and back with her, and back at the controls of their TARDIS. But still it irritated her that he was giving her the silent treatment. Why won't he hum anymore? I like his humming. Went a stray thought in Raven's head. Why was this bothering her? She didn't care what he thought of her. Did she? Of course she didn't. He didn't matter.
After a couple of hours of this silent treatment, where she had barely read a single page of her book she finally snapped it shut and slammed it onto the table next to her. She marched up to the console and finally spoke to the Doctor.
"What?!" she said aggressively. The Doctor didn't move, he just looked up at her, and his playful, childish eyes had a darkness to them that made Raven take a step back from her aggressive position.
"What's wrong with you?" Raven asked trying a calmer approach. "We've just saved an entire planet. Why are you giving me this silent treatment? Not that I care. But why?!"
The Doctor sighed moodily, his demeanour, his eyes. To Raven it was like looking in a mirror, and it scared her. But his demeanour softened a little as he spoke, though it still had an edge to it.
"You've just committed genocide." the Doctor said flatly.
"What?" Raven asked.
"Those creatures were new in the whole Universe. Never before seen, the first of their kind." the Doctor explained. "They were all like new born children, they didn't understand their place in the Universe."
"And it was going to multiply and feast off of the inhabitants of that planet!" Raven shot back.
"But they were weak, once they were in the well they were weak!" the Doctor insisted, his tone was sombre and fiercely serious. "I planned to contain them and take them somewhere where they could live out their lives in peace. They didn't need psychic energy to survive. That was something they fooled themselves into thinking." the Doctor explained. "They could survive on any barren rock happily and forever."
Raven adopted a defiant stance which said clearly that she thought she made the right call. "Until one escapes whatever prison you put it in and causes more death. It's better they're destroyed."
"You don't believe that." the Doctor stated looking Raven dead in the eye, "Please, please, please, tell me you feel just a little regret at wiping out a species that relatively had just been birthed?"
"They were monsters." Raven shot back.
"Raven, you can't go around exterminating whole life forms just to protect others." the Doctor said.
"Isn't that what you do?" Raven shot back. She'd learnt enough about the Doctor to know that he must be indirectly involved in murder on some level. How different was that to what she just did?
"I always shy away from genocide!" the Doctor said, his head low staring at the floor, he gripped the edges of the TARDIS console as if he was trying to hold something back. "Do you know what unsettled me? As you did it. As you wiped those creatures out, you had a look of utter ecstasy on your face. Your face doesn't 'do' ecstasy, Raven, it never has. It can't even crack a convincing smile, it can barely handle 'amused' before it considers that even too much of a stretch for your face to adopt; and yet murder makes you happy?"
"It wasn't the killing that made me happy!" Yes, it was, her mind told her. That's not helping me! She told it. She was already starting to feel wretched for being happy about killing, but she was killing evil. Surely it was 'that', that made her happy. Not killing in general.
"That's how it all starts" the Doctor said looking deeply into her eyes, "You destroy one species for the greater good. But it's not the only time. More times like it come, and you find yourself wiping out another species, and another, and another, all for a greater good you promise yourself, and then one day you wake up and realise that you are just as much a monster as they were, and the greater good you promised yourself? That never arrives."
Raven actually felt her blood run cold at the seriousness of those words. What had the Doctor done for him to learn that lesson? Who or what had he destroyed?
"You know, I once held the future of my greatest enemies in my hands. The most evil creatures that had ever been invented. All I had to do was just touch two wires together and their existence would be wiped from the face of reality."
"Why didn't you?" Raven guessed he hadn't. But she asked as if that is what the Doctor should have done without question.
"Because I didn't have the right to do it. To end them for all time; because I'd become no better than them; because I knew out of their evil came such great good. Future worlds, civil wars between different races ended, alliances formed just because of their fear of these creatures. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right call back then, perhaps things would be better, or maybe I cause something worse. But I know I'd be standing here right now asking that very same question if I did connect those wires. But am I confident I made the right choice? Yes, and I've spent all my lives after it upholding that choice." The Doctor sighed before trying to explain it another way. "If you knew the future and you saw a child you'd know would grow up totally evil. To be a ruthless dictator who'd destroy millions of lives. Could you then kill that child?"
Raven opened her mouth, but she hesitated. Would she? Would she be capable? "Yes, if it kills the evil, yes I would!" she forced herself to say. That's what people expected of monsters isn't it?
"You're lying to yourself again, I can tell." the Doctor said. "But what concerns me is you might actually force yourself to do it, for some promise to yourself of 'a greater good' that you'll never achieve." He was letting his emotions get the better of him, Raven knew it. Where was his Zagreus rhyme now? What a hypocrite.
"You know, we had the opportunity to kill you" the Doctor said, "That's why the Time Lords were called in on Azarath. We had the power to destroy you and it'd be beyond Trigons power to stop us. Raven, please don't make me regret saving you."
That did it, Raven flared up. She refused to be guilt tripped so easily. "Maybe you shouldn't have!" she shouted, "it would've been better if you had destroyed me from the start! Then your Shayde monsters would still be alive!" she'd had enough of the Doctors mood, his disappointment in her. He wasn't her father, he had no right to be disappointed in her. "Do you think I wanted to be born this way? To a demon wanting to destroy the world? To have powers I can't control? You had no right to make a call on my life!"
"No, and that's exactly why we didn't kill you!" the Doctor said. Despite being soft spoken he had such thunder to his voice that Raven fell silent, "Because you couldn't control how you were born, who or what you were born as. You came into this world with the draw of the lottery, and we didn't punish an innocent and ignorant child just because it had the 'wrong characteristics'. That is why we stayed our hand; that is why we let you live! You don't have to play the part of the monster."
Raven fought back her emotions, they were becoming wild, and out of control. Her eyes began to glow white as she approached the Doctor intending to intimidate him into shutting up, like she'd do to the other children on Azarath. The Doctor will know his place.
"Don't patronise me, Time Lord! I did what I believed was right." she didn't raise her voice, she remained totally emotionless, but there where moments where her voice cracked betraying what was underneath. "Those creatures were evil. Nasty. A danger. The universe is a better place with that species extinct." With her cloak closed, her body elongated itself so she stood a full head over the Doctor. She bent forward over him. Her teeth became sharp and her eyes glowed a vivid scarlet as she forced him to look up into them. It was a creepy display and her voice became unearthly and threatening. "Look at me, take a good long look at me, Time Lord! I am a monster! If you don't like it, then maybe you should have destroyed me!"
"YES, MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE!" the Doctor shouted back. His voice was so loud and full of anger Raven found herself retreating away from him, her form shrank back down to its normal size and shape. She hadn't expected that response, and... she... she was... scared... she was scared of him?! She was actually scared of him. He carried on, his voice like stone.
"Touch two wires together, it would've been that simple. But I refused to become like them, and because of that I've had to witness the devastation those creatures now delight in. The genocides they have caused, and I feel responsible because of the call I made."
The Doctor was advancing on her, how could one so gentle contain such fury?! "I can't change that now, I can't change my decision." he said "but I continued on, upholding the principle of that decision and others like it, that everything deserves a chance at redemption, a second chance; and then here I come, in one face or another, and I knock it back or cut it down when it goes too far and becomes evil, twisted and destructive. Daleks, Cybermen, Ice Warriors, Sontarans, the Human race." He paused, his eyes became cold, "And even you!"
Was he threatening her?! Raven backed herself towards the edge of the platform the console stood on. She lost her footing at the edge and fell backwards onto the rug below, her hood fell back revealing her face, and she was now crawling backwards on her elbows as the Doctor advanced towards her. The candles in the room had all been blown out as power had escaped Raven as she fell. Plunging the console room into darkness, except for the blue glow of the console.
Towering over her, the Doctor looked like a man possessed. This wasn't the same man she knew as the Doctor, she'd never suspected there was this darker side to him. The blue, back lighting made him all the more intimidating. She'd morphed herself into a monster, the Doctor hadn't flinched, and now here she was, scared of an alien mortal.
She tried to charge her powers and do something, anything. Raise up a defensive shield, to teleport him to another dimension, to forcibly pacify him, turn him to stone, freeze him, shrink him, maybe even choke him, rip out his hearts, pluck out his eyes, something; anything, to make him go away! But her powers were failing again, she was helpless.
Zagreus sits inside your head, Zagreus lives among the dead, she tried to recite, but the Doctors voice and piercing eyes snapped her attention back to him.
"Do you want to know why I don't fear you? Raven, Daughter of Trigon? Why I'm not scared? Do you want to learn the secret?" Her back was up against the bookcase and she wished she could disappear through it. Her eyes were wide as the Doctor stood over her, looking down in fury as she cowered. She wanted him to turn back into her Doctor; all smiles, cute, fluffy, infuriating optimism and irritating humour. Despite how much she disliked him, she'd gladly take him over this shadowy, darker version of him that is so full of fury and who now was baring down on her.
"I do not fear you, self proclaimed 'monster'," He said, his eyes drilling into her soul, "because I am the Doctor, and monsters always learn to fear me!"
He was right. She was terrified of him.
To Be Continued...
Authors notes: That's it for now, this is as far as I got in the planning stages. I would like to do more of this story idea, but I'll need to come up with other ways, ideas and plots for Raven's personality to be further shaped to what we see at the start of Teen Titans. But first things first. Raven will have to earn the Doctors trust back somehow.
I wanted there to be some kind of a rift forming between the two and I thought that Raven giving into her darkness with good intentions might have been something to make the Doctor turn on her.
The point of the Doctor at the end is he's trying to teach her to break away from her darker side. The delusion she has that she's a monster and should act like one, and he's trying to break this by providing a bit of 'tough love' since reasoning didn't seem to phase her.
From what I understand of Raven she has a dark side she has trouble controlling, and I thought it'd be interesting if that dark side won this one time by making the action of genocide feel so right and good. Which tends to be a core philosophy of Doctor Who. If you do terrible things for good intentions you're still just as bad as someone who does the same thing for horrible intentions.
I'm kind of proud the way I've written the debate between the two. I tried my best however to not make the Doctor look like he was whinging, but standing like a pillar of cold stone.