A/N: Apologies for the slow update for those following. 'Real life'… who needs it?! Anyway, here's the next chapter. Some romance (or not..) for Remus.

Chapter 2 - Dora

Remus had to admit he was impressed Sirius had somehow managed to gain Dumbledore's trust and confidence.

"I still get the feeling he's not telling me everything, but he's told me a fair bit." Sirius said, making Remus feel (though he didn't like to admit it) a bit envious. He was the one who'd worked alongside the man for a year at Hogwarts after all. He was the one who actually did as he was told in his work for the Order. Why hadn't he been the one the man had opened up to?

It transpired that Dumbledore had told Sirius he believed Voldemort had made at least one horcrux, and that he had found one recently at the dark wizard's ancestral home.

"Thank Merlin he didn't actually put the bloody thing on." Sirius said, telling Remus how the headmaster had shown him the ring he believed to contain a piece of Voldemort's soul. "Can you imagine what that might have done to him if he had?!"

"Why would he have put it on?" Remus asked, genuinely curious.

"Morbid curiosity?" Sirius suggested. "It's the kind of thing Dumbledore would do, isn't it? Sometimes I wonder if he thinks he's invincible."

"Well he was friends with the man who discovered immortality." Remus replied reasonably.

"He's not immortal himself though." Sirius said, quite obviously. "He's going to get himself killed if he tries to put on things containing bits of Voldemort's soul."

"Good thing you stopped him."

"He wants to give Harry private lessons this year." Sirius said with a slight frown.

"Why does he want to do that?"

"Presumably so he can prepare him for this stupid plan he's got for him."

"Neither can live while the other survives." Remus recited. "He's helping him survive. That can't hurt, can it?"

"Well it can if it makes him think he's got to take on Voldemort single-handedly! I'm not having him do anything stupid like going charging off trying to take him down on his own."

"Merlin forbid." Remus said, smiling slightly as he recalled the number of times his friend had tried to do just that in their younger years.

"It's not funny." Sirius insisted. "I swear if that kid goes wandering off one more time…"

"You'll congratulate him and Dumbledore will award another hundred house points." Remus completed for him. "Exactly as James would have wanted it."

All jokes aside though, both Remus and Sirius made Harry promise to keep his head down this year and under no circumstances to leave the castle alone.

"Moldy Voldy's officially on the loose now." Sirius told him, attracting a few startled looks from passers by at platform nine and three quarters where they'd gone to see Harry off. "I mean obviously we've known it for a year already." He rolled his eyes. "But there's no denying it now. You're the chosen one." And he executed a mock sort of bow.

"I wish everyone would stop saying that." Harry said, rubbing his neck awkwardly as he glanced apologetically round. "I'm nothing special."

This was one of those moments where Harry was so endearingly not like James, Remus couldn't help but hug him. "And you're all the more special for it." He said.

They broke apart and Harry grinned at him. They were the same height now. Harry might even be taller than him. He really wasn't a child anymore. "Take care." Remus said for what was surely the thousandth time.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Sirius added (which Remus had to admit probably didn't leave many things off limits).

"And stay in touch." Remus added.

Harry promised he would (to all the above) and they both waved him off as he moved over to board the Hogwarts Express.

"He'll be alright." Remus said, more to himself than to Sirius as they watched the scarlet steam engine turn a bend and vanish from sight.

"I know." Sirius said, probably more trying to convince himself than because he believed it. "I'll miss him though."

Remus turned to look at Sirius. There was an expression in his friend's eyes that Remus rarely saw there.

Of all three of his old friends, Sirius had always been the most guarded. He rarely showed his emotions and would dismiss any show of male affection with an immature joke.

But there were moments, and this was one of them, when he was also the most loyal, affectionate person Remus could ever hope to know. He and James had been as close as any two boys could be (without straying into the territory Sirius was so quick to joke about), and it seemed he had transferred his devotion directly onto James' son. Remus couldn't imagine anyone who could have cared for Harry more than Sirius.

They arrived back at headquarters to find Tonks waiting for them there.

Remus smiled upon seeing her. "Hi, Dora." He said, moving over to join her at the table.

"Any news?" Sirius asked her, sitting down too.

Tonks shook her head. "Fortunately we were prepared. There were a few near misses… people trying to stop the muggleborn students returning to Hogwarts... but Scrimgeour had all us aurors and others in Thicknesse's department ready to arrest them. Some of them might be death eaters. But I expect most are just sad, lonely, pathetic little..."

"Terrorists." Sirius completed for her. "I don't care whether they've got the dark mark or not. Anyone who supports Voldemort's ideals ought to be treated as a death eater and chucked in Azkaban."

"They're not doing much besides being hateful." Tonks said, shaking her head. "But there's certainly a type."

"Red faced, older middle aged…" Remus began to recite.

"Angry at the world." Sirius continued, slicing the roast gammon they were having for lunch with rather more ferocity than necessary. "Thought things were better in their day."

"They probably were. For purebloods." Remus said, thinking of the changes in the recent decades since Dumbledore had been made headmaster. The old crowd certainly hadn't liked the new liberal direction he'd taken the school in.

"They'd have found something else to have complained about." Sirius said bitterly. "People like my family are never happy."

"I'm cheerful enough!" Tonks protested from across the table.

"You don't count." Sirius told her.

"Oh well cheers!" Tonks said, rolling her eyes at Remus who felt the familiar flutter in his chest as she looked at him.

He knew there was more chance of Sirius signing up for the death eaters than Tonks liking him in return though. How could she possibly be interested in someone as poor, old and dangerous as him?

"Poor old Remus." Sirius had teased, not at all sympathetic to his suffering. "When are you going to start realising you're not a half bad bloke?"

His friends had always done this for him. Attempted to boost his self-esteem and stop him wallowing in self-pity.

"I'm being realistic." Remus said.

"You're being ridiculous." Sirius had replied firmly. "Firstly, you're not poor. I've already told you you can take what you want from my family's vault at Gringotts. Quite honestly it would be doing me a favour. And you're thirty-bloody-six! It's hardly geriatric. As for being dangerous? Well you're not as bad as Voldemort and Tonks doesn't seem frightened of him. Any woman would be lucky to have you, mate."

But despite his friend's reassurances, he couldn't possibly voice how he felt to Dora. He saw her as more of a Dora than a Tonks. He'd got to know the feisty young woman quite well over the last year, and could see a tenderness and gentleness that quite belied her fiery persona. He sometimes wondered if being one of the only female aurors in the department made her feel she had to toughen herself up a bit.

"How much did you have to do with her growing up?" He asked Sirius one day as they discussed their colleague.

He wanted to know everything there was to know about the object of his affections and Sirius, as her mother's cousin, must surely have plenty of stories to share.

But Sirius shook his head. "Not much. Andromeda and I did our best to keep in touch after we both got blasted off the family tapestry, but you know how things are. Life got in the way I suppose. I met Tonks, or Nymphadora as she was called then, just the once I think. She must have been about five. I think she invited me to join her tea party. I feel a bit bad for refusing her now…"

Remus smiled.

"If you like her just ask her out." Sirius said, rolling his eyes and bringing Remus' attention quickly back to the twenty three year old Tonks. "The worst that could happen is she refuses."

Yes, Remus thought wryly, that was the worst thing that could happen. And so it was for this reason exactly that he didn't do it.

For some strange reason though, Dora seemed to enjoy his company. She was always cheerful when they were paired together on missions, and kept up a steady stream of chatter throughout.

Remus of course shared her enthusiasm, though he did find it a lot harder to stay focused with her beside him, every so often catching a heady whiff of her perfume on the night air.

It was on one such mission that Tonks said the words he'd both been longing and dreading to hear.

It was dusk and some of the Order members had been sent to stakeout Travers' country home in Hertfordshire. Remus and Tonks were hiding in one flutterby bush, Sirius and Dedalus Diggle in another.

Though they were supposed to be being quiet, Sirius and Dedalus certainly weren't bothering to keep their voices down. There was the regular sound of Dedalus' shrill laughter as snippets of the dirty limericks Sirius kept inventing to help pass the time reached their hiding place.

"There was an old wizard named… Ray"

Sirius began again.

"Who I am delighted to say

Had a wand so large

Both Wanda and Marge…"

"Shut up!" Remus hissed, but his warning fell on deaf ears.

"Made magic with him every day."

"Oh lighten up Moony, that one's not even that bad!" Sirius called over as Diggle cackled with renewed delight.

"It's terrible!" Tonks replied, but Remus could tell she was grinning.

"He is funny, isn't he?" She said, turning back to Remus. "And still handsome, even after Azkaban."

Remus couldn't help it. A rush of jealously overwhelmed him as he realised that, like every other girl he'd ever fancied, Tonks had fallen for Sirius.

It wasn't fair. Sirius always got the girls. Though he didn't seem to notice or care, he'd certainly been one of the most popular boys at Hogwarts. It was infuriating as he didn't even seem to need to do anything. While Remus, Peter and James would discuss strategies, chat up lines and invest in all sorts of things to improve their general attractiveness to the opposite sex, Sirius would rock up unwashed, uninterested and unkind and somehow sweep them all off their feet anyway.

"Guess you've fallen for him too…" Remus said bitterly, not even really aware he'd said the words out loud until Tonks glared at him.

"You'd know perfectly well who I've fallen for, if you weren't so busy feeling sorry for yourself." She snapped.

It was as though someone had turned a light on in a dark room. It was like the whole world had started to sing. It was a lightness, a giddiness, an overwhelming joy beyond any he'd ever experienced before.

And how did he reply to her? What did he do?

Absolutely bugger all.

"You're being weird." Sirius told him one night over dinner.

"Am I?" He replied vaguely.

He knew he was though. Since Dora had told him of her feelings it was as if some sort of raging battle had started inside him.

On the one hand, he couldn't believe it. That the woman he had fancied for over a year now could actually like him back was too amazing for words. But on the other hand… what was she thinking? She couldn't really fancy him. He could never actually act on his feelings towards her. It wouldn't be fair. She was far too young, whole and free to be burdened with an ageing werewolf.

Sirius was losing his patience with him. "Tonks told me what she said to you." He said bluntly. "She said you made her feel like an idiot."

And now there was guilt on top of anguish to contend with.

"She doesn't understand why you're being such a bloody martyr." His friend went on. "If you both like each other what's the big deal?"

"Life's not that simple." Remus said irritably. Sirius didn't get it. There was nothing wrong with him.

"No, sure." Sirius said sarcastically. "Merlin forbid that if two folks like each other they shouldn't be allowed to hop into..."

"You don't get it." He snapped. "You've never had a problem with women. Must be nice... But it's not like that for all of us."

Sirius blinked at him. "Moony, you've got to be joking. I'm fucking terrible with women."

Remus stared at him. The confession was so unexpected he forgot to be angry. "What do you mean? 'No you're not. You're…"

"Yeah, sure." Sirius said with a humourless laugh. "Always dating someone. But what does that even mean? I've never been any good at it. Not the way you are, or James was…"

Remus was a little thrown by this. He'd never considered his good looking, confident friend to have any problems at all in the female department. Truth be told, he never considered him to have any problems full stop. One thing he did know about Sirius though was that he was very good at hiding his feelings. He was suddenly grateful for the opportunity to be distracted from his own.

"What makes you say that?" Remus asked, wondering if his friend would open up or laugh the whole thing off with a joke (as was his custom). "Or don't tell me, and I'll keep self-pitying." He added with a small smile.

"So boost your morale by decimating mine?" Sirius said, smiling wryly back. "Sounds fair." And then he sighed. "Alright. I'll tell you."

Remus had to admit, he felt ten times more warmly towards his friend after that. He supposed he'd always known Sirius had issues with trust. How could he not have? He'd grown up surrounded by people who supported Voldemort. It wasn't exactly a stellar blueprint for decent humanity.

"Not everyone's like that." Remus told him. "You… need to remember that."

"I know." Sirius said, sighing and running a hand through his hair.

"But you don't." Remus said sadly.

Sirius sighed again. "Maybe not." He admitted. "But enough about me. Why don't you know being bitten by a werewolf doesn't make you a bad bloke?"

Remus considered his friend. He never felt he had much in common with Sirius when they were very young. The other boy had been outgoing, self-assured and optimistic, all the things Remus wasn't. But then he recalled some of the conversations they'd had as they got a bit older. As Sirius divulged more about the abuse he suffered at home, and how he struggled to see it wasn't his fault.

They'd both been innocent children. What happened to them hadn't been their choice, yet they'd suffered the consequences and both borne the scars. Maybe they did have more in common than they both realised.

"I'm not sure." Remus admitted at last.

Sirius held his gaze, the candlelight reflected in his face and making him look somehow both much older and younger than his years.

"No. Me neither." He said quietly.

Whatever Sirius may say, however, Remus knew he was damaged goods.

But the least he could do was tell Dora. He owed her that much.

He picked his moment one evening after Order business. Tonks was sitting in the drawing room, working on a crossword Sirius had abandoned.

"Dora, can I have a word?"

Dora grinned. "I was about to ask you the same thing. Six down. Cymry vert. Clue: breaths fire."

"Welsh Green." Remus said automatically. But then he gathered himself. "Dora, I need to talk to you."

He moved to sit down and Tonks, frowning at him, put the paper to one side. "What is it?"

"I know you think I'm being ridiculous…"

"But you're going to be anyway." Dora said coolly.

"You don't get it." Remus said, not looking at her. "You're young. You're optimistic. You think it won't matter, if you and I…" he gestured vaguely, still unable to say exactly what he so desperately longed for out loud.

Tonks fixed him with a fierce look. It made Remus feel more worthless than ever. "No. You don't get it." She said crossly. "You don't get that there are some things in life worth fighting for. I'm prepared to risk people talking. I'm prepared to risk them not understanding. I'm prepared to risk anything for you, Remus. The fact that you won't probably should tell me all I need to know about you." Her eyes filled with tears. "But I can't help myself. Merlin knows sometimes I wish I could. But I can't. I'm hopelessly, totally, completely in love with you."