***Chapter Five***

He stopped when he saw that someone was already there, despite the fact that pink from the sunrise still streaked the sky. Then he recognized that it was Vanessa and decided what could not be avoided might as well be faced.

Heath walked over to his father's grave and sat down beside Vanessa on the grass. "I should have known you knew how to ride."

"Your father taught me."

"He didn't teach me!" The bitterness and the hate were all there in those ordinary words.

She made no direct answer but started speaking softly. "Nick hadn't turned sixteen when he'd finished with his schooling, at least that was what he thought. Tom suddenly announced that Nick would be going to prep school to prepare for college." Vanessa paused a moment. Knowing that she had caught Heath's attention, she continued, "For Victoria to have said that Nicholas should follow Jarrod into higher education would have been one thing, but for Tom to say it — not as an offer but as an order — was quite the surprise. No one was more surprised than Nick. He did not take it well."

Heath looked at her for the first time and simply arched his eyebrow.

"That is an understatement. Nick and your father had the worst argument they ever had. It ended with Tom tanning Nick for quote 'disrespect, defiance, and disobedience'."

"He did?"

"I told you Tom was quite stern with Jarrod and Nick. After Victoria and I spoke with Tom, he relented."

An amused smile flickered across Heath's lips. So even he couldn't stand against Mother and this one.

"Nickie, however, remained angry."

The smile flickered again. "I've never heard anyone else call him Nickie."

"No one else does, but that is a story for another time." A smile flickered on Vanessa's face.

"Nick's not one to stay in a temper. Get in one, sure, but he blows up and then it's over. He never sulks long."

"A week later, he was still speaking to your father only when spoken to."

"Because of the licking?"

"No, Nick knew what he had done to deserve that, or so he told me when I asked."

"How come it doesn't surprise me that you asked?" Heath shifted so that he was facing Vanessa and gave her a teasing grin.

"Because you already know me well." Vanessa patted his cheek.

"Why was Nick angry then?"

"He felt your father had betrayed him."

At Vanessa's announcement Heath simply looked puzzled.

"Nick knew that their father often failed to understand Jarrod, but he thought that could never happen between Tom and himself. Nick had thought that if Victoria or Jarrod pressed for him to go away to school, Tom would fight on his side. It took Nick some time to understand the reasons behind Tom's decision and to forgive his father." When Heath opened his mouth to speak, Vanessa put her finger against it. "If you want to know about that, you will have to talk to your brother."

"Nick forgave our father, so I should too. Is that the point? It's hardly the same thing." Heath's anger was again in his voice.

"The only other time Nick was as angry with Tom was when he died. For Nick, that was another betrayal."

Heath sprang to his feet and glared down at Vanessa. "Am I angry because he up and died on me? Am I? Yes! Damnation! I'm so mad I could kill him for it!" What started as a dry, mirthless chuckle ended as a sob. Heath quickly turned away.

Vanessa scrambled to her feet and held him in place with a hand on his arm. "Heath, he's not here to take that anger from you, so you're going to have to find a way to just let it go."

"Damn him, damn him! Why did he have to die?" Heath's arms encircled his stomach as if he were in physical pain. He crumpled to his knees, and a low wail issued from his mouth.

Vanessa knelt beside him and drew his head into her lap. "Let it out, child. Let it out." Tears rolled down Vanessa's cheeks as she listened to the low keening coming from the young man in her arms as his body shuddered and trembled.

After a time, he grew quiet, and Vanessa slipped away, knowing the depth of his Barkley pride.