A Biker's Tale
Chapter 2 - Castle Has A Great Fall
"Hey Beckett, where's Writer Boy? We haven't seen him in two, going on three, weeks. What's up with Castle?'
"I don't know Espo, since when have I become his keeper?"
"Well he IS your partner, IS he not?"
"Espo, he does have a day job and you know how he gets behind in his writing because he is here with us, playing cop."
"Yeah, but usually he tells us that Gina is on him to finish his chapters that are due and he will be gone for awhile so he can play catch up. He does normally call to find out what he is missing while he's away. But he's gone silent on us, so what's the story?"
Kate had not noticed the time that had passed since the last time Castle had been in to work with them on a case. Espo was right, Castle normally gave them a 'heads up' that he would be missing for a while. Still, Kate had been too busy on a personal matter to notice the time lapse with Castle. She had been working on breaking up with Josh.
She had become mortified at Castle's presence at her apartment that one morning after she had just slept with Josh. They had celebrated in her bed his early return back to the city. She had sensed since their dirty bomb case that Castle wanted to tell her something important and would have done so had not Josh showed up. But when she went home with Josh that night, after the case had ended, it was for a send off for Josh. He was heading to Haiti, where he was to be for 45 days. Little did she know he was to come back sooner and surprise her.
That early return from his Haiti mission had set the stage for Castle to witness that morning after event. He had caught them in an embarrassing manner with Castle seeing Josh emerge from her bedroom. The couple had just finished their night together, a night of a hot 'welcome home' session. It was worst than that time her dad had caught her making out with her high school boyfriend at the time.
Still, with Josh's absence, she had come to realize it was not working out for them. He had been away too many times for a lasting relationship. She had mentioned to Castle that she just wanted someone to be there for her. Then she had an epiphany, Castle was that someone! He had been with her for more than three years now. So even though he had left her for a whole summer, he did return. So in Josh's absence, she had thought more about Rick and where it might go with him. She was shocked to see Castle that morning because she had just been with Josh and he was still there in her bedroom. Kate saw the disappointment in Rick's face when Josh had emerged from her bedroom and Castle realized that he had caught them in a 'morning after' scenario.
She had been waiting since that embarrassing morning after event for Castle to bring up what happened. She wanted to reveal to him what had occurred with Josh later that same night when he had invited her out to dinner. She recalls that dinner:
Castle had left the 12th early that day after they had solved the Temptation Lane case. Josh had called her earlier and asked her out to dinner. At the dinner, Josh revealed to her the one big reason for coming back early from Haiti. He had been offered another opportunity by DWB, regional director of their African program. Josh was quitting his job in NYC to accept the offer, but needed her to answer a question. That is why he had come back earlier than expected.
The next thing she recalls is that Josh was on his knees showing her a ring and asking her to marry him.
"Marry me and come with me to Africa, Kate. We can make a good life together there."
"Josh, this is so sudden! What has prompted this?"
"Kate, I love you, and want you to be with me in Africa and in my life altogether."
This was the second time a man had proposed to her and asked her to leave her job to join him. That first man had been Wil Sorensen and she had told him 'no'. She loved her job too much, and the city she called home, to join Wil elsewhere. She was not about to leave for Boston to find a new job with the PD there just to be with Sorensen. Kate was now not about to do the same for Josh either.
Besides, what job could she find in Africa? She would become like a kept woman there! Only waiting for him to come home, with no job to keep her busy. But her strongest reason for telling him 'no' was that she knew Josh was not the one. What they had was good but it was not enough. She had come to realize that he was not what she wanted. Yes the sex had been good, but that was all it had been about with the two of them.
She wanted more and Josh was lacking in that. Josh could not give her what she longed for….a man who could complete her. A man who made her whole, both in body and in spirit. A man who when he was absent made her want him near. She never got that with Josh. When he was on mission with DWB, she did not miss him. Truth was she did not even think about him when he was away. That spoke strongly on their relationship, or lack there of. So she had said 'no', thinking she had sent Josh off to Africa alone.
But Josh would not take 'no' for an answer. He was not giving up. He was persistent, sending her flowers, asking her to reconsider. Sending her email and voicemail by the numbers again pleading his case. His last desperate attempt had been to tell her he would refuse the African offer and stay in NYC if she took him back. She finally had to ask for a last dinner with Josh wherein she ended it in person. She left no doubt with Josh as to them breaking up.
So Kate had not noticed the three week lapse of Castle's presence. All had happened so quickly that Kate had lost all sense of time since she had last been with Castle. It had been three weeks and she'd not heard anything from him! Something was up with Castle and she needed to know what it was. She missed him and that spoke volumes about his importance to her. She tries to reach Castle on her cell, only to be directed to his message box. She leaves him voice messages that he should call her back.
Days pass and still no word from Castle. Now she was getting worried! The thought of not having him in her life hung thick with Kate. He had left her once and that absence had driven her to Josh.
That last time she saw him was at the end of the case shortly after that unexpected morning visit from Castle. Had what happened that morning caused Rick to leave because of Josh? She knew how it had appeared to him, but as they worked the case, he had said nothing. Kate had thought Castle was waiting for the right moment to ask about it. She wanted to tell him of her breakup with Josh, but had that incident with Josh now caused Rick to leave her? She gets on her phone and makes a lunch date with Lanie. She needed to vent and get a second opinion here. Lanie had always been her 'go to' gal for that.
Lunch With Lanie
"So are you sure it's not just Castle playing catch up on his day job to account for his current absence?", the ME asks of Kate.
"It's like Espo said, Castle normally will call when he's away just to see what he is missing and he has not done that. I've been too busy ending it with Josh to notice the time and when I did call Castle, the call went to voicemail."
"Wait, did you just say you broke what with Josh, why am I just hearing about this now?"
She tells Lanie about the morning Castle caught Josh coming out of her bedroom.
"Okay, so maybe he is at his Hampton summer home so he can write undisturbed but didn't he leave last summer just to do that. It might be that way now."
Kate gets on her cell phone.
"What are you doing Kate. I thought you said calling Castle put you on his voicemail?"
"I'm calling Alexis, she'll know if her Dad is out of town."
Kate hears Alexis phone ring and then hears the young lady's voice, "Detective Beckett, why are you calling me? What may I do for you?"
"Sorry to bother you, Alexis, but I haven't heard from your dad in a while. When I call his cell, it goes to voicemail. What's up with your father, Alexis?"
"He is out of town, up in our summer home in the Hamptons."
"I guessed as much, do you know when he is coming back?"
"No, in fact, I did not even know he had gone. He just told my Grams three weeks ago he was leaving and to let me know. I was in school that morning when he left. He just told Grams he would check in, but he has not called me regularly, which is not like him. Normally he calls to just see on me and how I am, but I haven't heard from him in two weeks. Last call I got was days after he left. He hasn't called since, but I know he is still at the Hamptons."
"Really and how do you know that Alexis?"
"Don't go telling dad, Detective Beckett, but I have a tracker on his phone and it shows that he is still there."
"Alexis Castle, so not you, but have you any info on why he is up there? I'm thinking it's to catch up on his writing."
"My same thoughts, but normally Gina calls to ask how's he doing when he's up there and she hasn't done so, there might be another reason he's there."
"Okay, do you think Martha was told why he's there?"
"You'll have to call and ask grams, but she may not get back to you quickly. Grams has been busy setting up her Acting School. She also has been late coming home to the loft, she has had dinner delivered to the Loft for about a week now. She comes home when I am asleep and the only reason I know she came home is the dinner plates she leaves in the dish washer that I see in the mornings. I have had cereal for breakfast this last week because she's not there to fix breakfast for me. She normally leaves me toast, eggs and bacon in the morning but she's been too busy even for that and leaves me voice mail to apologize."
"I see. Well, I'll call her, and leave voice mail but will not be surprised if she takes a while to answer. Thank you Alexis, nice talking to you."
"Same here detective, I'll call if I get word."
Kate hangs up and then sees Lanie with a puzzled look. Lanie had heard her responses to Alexis but not hearing Alexis side of the conversation left Lanie with a gap in her understanding of the phone call to Castle's daughter.
"So?", asks Lanie once Kate ends her cell call.
"Well he is at the Hamptons, but it might be for other then catching up on his day job. Alexis has no clue, but Martha might, but she has been busy setting up her Acting School and has been so busy she has not talked to Alexis about Rick's absence."
"Oh, so there could be another reason for him being there, like maybe the incident with Josh has him wanting some time to think about it?"
"Well, I will leave Martha a voice message, but as you heard, I may get a delayed reply."
"So we'll have to wait and see?", the ME states.
"Lanie, what if Rick is up there for the another reason. He is there thinking about what happened that morning when he showed up and saw Josh come out of my bedroom?"
"Precisely!"
"If that's the case, he may have left a second time, like what happened last summer, but this time he may not return. If that's what's going on here, Lanie, what do I need to respond to it? To make things better?"
"Oh Kate, sweetie, you are not going to like what I am gonna tell you. You may have to chase after him this time and that is assuming he will even let you do that? He may be so hurt this time around that you may have lost him permanently."
"Lanie, I don't want to hear that!"
"I know you don't, but let's not jump to conclusions here yet. Let this play out, but if it heads the wrong way, you need a plan Kate."
"Plan? As in what, Lanie?"
"As in getting him back, but first you need to know how bad he is hurting. If his absence is a sign of that, you are in deep here Kate?"
"You think!? How do I go about getting him back?"
"With much difficulty and even more effort on your part, Kate."
Kate eyes start to water as she hears Lanie's response.
The ME sees Kate tears and then says,"Oh sweetie, you love him, don't you? It just now hit you."
"Oh Lanie, I have really messed up with him."
"We'll find a way Kate, and the boys will help, but you will have to remain strong. As strong, if not stronger, than Rick had been until you broke him."
"Can I put him back together again Lanie?"
"Let's hope. We are, after all, better than all the king's horses, and all the king's men, and we can put him together again. Just believe in it, and in yourself, like Castle had once did for you."
Lanie as usual had calmed Kate's fears, but his time around, Kate is more aware of what she had done. How her actions had hurt Castle badly. The man was a very forgiving person, but Kate had exceeded his limit. What Kate feared the most about all of this, was that she may have done permanent damage to her relationship with Castle.
She may never regain his trust and without it, she could not hope to move the relationship forward. She needed to go beyond what even she had dared hope for in them. Still Kate remained optimistic and she asked the Universe to show her a way. The end of a long and difficult Journey starts with the first simple steps. Kate would start with taking those simple steps.