CHAPTER 113: Requiem For A Dream (Part 6)

Dumbledore had left for his office soon after. It was unfortunate, Harry had been planning on asking him more questions about how they went about to kill Voldemort in this universe. Maybe even just learning what the Horcruxes were could be a good help. But it became quite clear that this Dumbledore was a very different man from the one he had met in his own universe, and something told him he wouldn't respond too kindly to Harry's questions. Yaxley's map would have to be enough, for now anyway.

Harry had meant to go straight home after that, but for some reason, he didn't. He first walked through the castle's corridors, slowly making his way up to the seventh floor, where he found the Gryffindor Common Room once again. He still remembered the password from the last day of term, and it was somehow still valid, so the Fat Lady let him inside. For the first time since he'd seen it, it was quiet. Empty. It felt lifeless, in a way, but much more bearable than the alternative. It reminded him a bit of his house at Godric's Hollow. All the red and gold, the lion imagery, and the warmth of the fire that permeated through the entire tower - it felt just like his home from this other life. It was probably on purpose, a way for his parents to remember their Hogwarts years.

He lingered there as much as he could, taking in every bit of the common room as he could, breathing in the scent of cinnamon and burning wood, before moving up to the dormitories. He didn't linger much, instead lying down on his bed where he drifted off to sleep. Once he woke up, he felt calmer, and more determined, and went to take a long shower on the Gryffindor boys' showers. Once he was dry and dressed up, his hair the untamable mess he had let it be in this universe, Harry left the common room and exited the castle through the main doors. Instead of sneaking away as he had entered, he made his way along the path, crossing through the grounds until he reached the large gate.

When it opened, Harry turned back towards the castle. He didn't see Dumbledore there, but somehow, he knew he was looking down on him at that moment.

Once he crossed the wards, he turned on the spot and began his exit.

His first stop was the Burrow. The tall, mangled house looked as inviting as ever, even with Mrs Weasley's suspicious look as he stepped inside. The place was all chaos and mess, not unlike the other Weasleys from back in his other life, only this time he was actually included in all the mayhem. Ginny barely paid attention to him, but that was alright, the twins were actually bearable and slightly funny in this universe.

"Stay for lunch, Harry," Mr Weasley asked brightly. And despite himself, Harry accepted.

The food was delicious, he didn't expect anything less from Mrs Weasley, but the company was even better. This time, he didn't have to force himself to take pleasure out of being with all of them. And if there were moments when he was quiet and a bit sad, it wasn't because he missed his old friends back home.

"Thank you," Harry told Ron once the both of them were alone in his room. His voice was rough, and the words were harder to let out than he'd thought.

"What for?"

"Just… for everything, you know? I have a feeling my life would have been a lot less fun without you."

Ron was quiet for a moment, looking at him, almost afraid. "Harry, you're not going to… you know…?"

He laughed. "No, Ron. I'm fine, really. I just wanted to make sure I got to thank you before I forgot."

Harry visited Seamus next. He didn't stay long at his place, and there were no emotional words exchanged, instead, he went up to his room and played a few rounds of Super Smash Bros on his Nintendo after drinking a few shots of Firewhisky - for luck, obviously. He found Dean on a date with Padma in Diagon Alley. Besides Ron, all the double dates he had with Dean made him the closest thing he made to a friend. It was harder to say goodbye than he had thought, and even harder to pretend he wasn't actually saying it. Lavender and Parvati weren't there at Diagon Alley, but Harry still sent them a small message through Padma.

When he apparated next, he found himself right outside of Grimmauld Place. He'd been there only once, one Sunday afternoon, when Black offered to host and invited his parents and him over. The house was completely renovated compared to how it looked in his universe, and that made it slightly easier, but he still hated that day. Harry wasn't really sure why he had come here, but he stepped inside nonetheless. Without Walburga's portrait there to make a fuss, Harry actually managed to scare Black when he walked into the TV room.

"Merlin, Harry," he breathed out. "Why'd you need to sneak up on me."

Harry got the sense that it was a rare thing, someone managing to sneak up on Black, and he took it with pride. He sat on one of the armchairs, and ignored Black as he watched the crappy action flick that was playing on the TV. There was a lot he wanted to say, oh, how he wanted to curse him for it all. For snapping his wand and throwing him in a cell. For not even looking for him after he escaped Azkaban and listening to Lupin's lies. For going after Pettigrew and getting himself imprisoned in the first place. But as much as he wanted to lay it all out, this wasn't that man.

"You were a good Godfather," he said after twenty or so minutes had passed. "Even when I was a little shit."

"We've all been little shits at least once or twice in our lives," Black jested, trying to hide just how much he appreciated his words.

He left soon after that, heading over to Lupin's place, where he had a similar interaction. Lupin, though, didn't attempt to hide any feelings and openly shed a tear as he hugged him. Harry was still uncomfortable, but he made an effort for the man who was actually kind to Harry Potter - even if it wasn't him. Still, as far as he was concerned, his Lupin and Black still had their debt to settle with him.

The sun had nearly set by the time he apparated to Hermione's home. He stood outside, stoic despite the cold wind, as he looked in through the windows from the other side of the street. He found her in the downstairs study, hunched over a book as her hand wrote rapid notes in a small, pink notebook she had next to her. Harry lost track of time with how long he stood out there, the orange tint of the sky had been taken over by darkness already, and he still couldn't muster the courage to knock on her door. Unlike with all the rest, there was nothing he could say to her. And she would instantly know what he was going to do if she saw him like this, and he wasn't quite sure he wanted to know her reaction.

After a while, he settled on simply seeing her for a final time. He didn't need to say anything to her, didn't even need her to see him. But it would have felt wrong to leave without having a sort of farewell with her. Her head suddenly sprang upward, and Harry somehow knew that she felt his eyes on her, and just as she was about to turn towards him, he disapparated from the street and landed right outside the door to his house.

Harry reached for the doorknob, but his hand refused to turn. Suddenly, it dawned on him that this was it. Once he went inside, it would all be over. All the doubts from the previous weeks began surging again, everything began screaming at him that he should stay and just figure it out. But he knew he couldn't, not really. This wasn't his life any more, and he couldn't make it his, no matter how much he wanted to.

Different doesn't mean less.

He turned the knob and stepped inside, almost as surprised as his parents when he saw them in the living room.

"When did you go out?" His mother asked. There was a hint of danger in her voice, something he had only recently begun sensing, but Harry ignored it as he crossed the room and knelt down on the fireplace. He grabbed a pinch of floo powder and threw it onto the logs as he said: "Bones residence." When a small green fire lit up, Harry pressed his face to it. His surroundings swirled and morphed into Susan's living room, the girl herself currently sitting on one of the couches with a book in hand.

"Harry?" She asked when she spotted him.

"Hey, Susan, can you floo here for a moment please?" His voice sounded calm, and that relaxed him even more. "Just quickly, it'll only take a few minutes."

"Sure. Let me just tell Aunt Amelia and I'll be there."

Harry quickly thanked her before pulling out from her fireplace.

"What was that all about?" His father asked.

"And who gave you permission to invite Susan over?" His mother continued. "It's late, and you didn't even tell us you were going out."

"I know, and I should have. I just have something really important to tell you and I need her here to hear."

"And this couldn't wait until the morning?" His father asked.

Harry laughed, a bit sadly. "No, I'm afraid not."

He sat his parents down, and though they fussed for a moment or so, he got them on the couch. Susan took a few more minutes to arrive, but Harry took advantage of that and made three cups of tea that he set down on the small table in the living room. For some reason, that made his parents worry, and Susan was quick to sense the tension that was growing when he was urging her to sit down.

"What's happening, Harry?" She asked, but he just handed her her cup and gave her a small kiss on her lips.

They were here. All three of them. With Ron and Hermione and the others, it was different. He would get to see them again. The real versions, at least. The ones he grew up with. And he'd get Theo and Pansy and the other Slytherins back. Mrs Weasley wouldn't hate him any more. Even morons like Kieran would be there. But these three… it would be the last time he ever saw them. The last time he could talk to them without needing to head over to a graveyard. He got them back for nearly three months. Three whole months of getting to know them and love them better than he ever did. And even if they weren't the perfect images of the people he thought them as before, he still wouldn't have changed a thing.

He could try and stay here for longer. Even if he did have to leave, it didn't have to be this soon, did it? But it had only been three months and this was still the hardest thing he had ever done until now. If he did stay here for a little longer, just to be with them, he didn't think he would be able to once again muster the strength to have all his farewells and say goodbye properly again. He couldn't understand why the right choice always felt like the hardest.

"Son," his father spoke and broke him out of his him. "Are you okay?"

A laugh bubbled out of him, and he looked away as his eyes began stinging.

"Harry," his mother stood up, but when she took a step toward him, Harry stepped backward.

"No? Yes? I don't know," he shrugged. "I think I lost track a long time ago."

"Talk to us, alright?" His mother pressed. "What's happen-"

"I've been lying to you," Harry interrupted. "All of you. It's been going on for a while, and I think you've all known. I…" They all looked at him, confused and sad and hurt, and he faltered. "I'm not your son. I'm not your boyfriend. I'm not… your Harry."

"What?" His father asked. "What do you mean?"

"No," Susan stood up and shook her head. "You are. You're my boyfriend. You-"

"Harry," his mother pleaded.

"I didn't plan this. It wasn't me, it was a phoenix. She… I don't know, dropped me here.? Had me change places with your actual Harry? I'm not really sure, I'm sorry. This… this all sounds weird, I know, I just, I- I don't know how to explain it."

"How about from the beginning," his father said, and though his voice was calm, Harry could feel the anger inside him.

Harry took a deep breath. It was always hard, talking about this. He never thought he would be saying this to these people, but here he was. "When I was a baby my parents were murdered, and I was sent to live with my aunt and uncle - your sister, mum. I didn't know about magic. The only thing I knew about you guys was that you were drunks who caused an accident and died. But then Professor McGonagall came to my house and told me I was a wizard… and since that day my life went to hell. I was… tortured. Betrayed. Abandoned by everyone around me. And that was just my first two months at Hogwarts. After that… well, let's just say a lot of bad things happened." He turned to Susan. "And I lost you, only after a few weeks of dating, you were murdered right in front of me. You died in my arms. After that, my life was sent to shit, my wand got snapped not so long ago and I kind of… lost it there, for a good moment. I did some unforgivable things, and my soul took a toll from it. The type of thing you can't really fix, you know?"

His mother gasped. "You didn't…"

"Split it?" He asked. "No, nothing like that. Just sort of… hurt it. I couldn't heal it, but I tried to stop hurting it. Then there was this attack, Death Eaters, and I tried helping out. Hunting the bastards down and all, and I did. I must have done it a little too well because the next thing I know, a bloody phoenix appears right as I'm about to fall to my death, and then I'm here. Your Harry, the real one, had just broken into the Ministry and you guys are all mad, and I'm just happy to have you back, you know?"

"And our son?" His father asked.

"I don't know. Phoenixes are… weird, and powerful. And I never thought to ask. But I assume safe? I don't know if he can see and feel this or if he's just sleeping, but it doesn't matter because you're getting him back. I'm going back, tonight."

"Back where?" Susan asked.

"Home," Harry shrugged.

"Home?" His mother shrieked. "This is your home! Right here. With us."

"Lily-"

"No, James! This is our son. I don't care where he was born or how he came here or the stupid cosmic implications here. He is our son, and I won't just stand here and wave him off as he heads back to that… that… dystopia he calls his life. There must be something we can do to keep him here and get our other Harry back."

"You can't," Harry said calmly.

"You haven't tried!" His mother cried out. "You can't know that."

"And we're supposed to just abandon our actual son until we figure out how?" His father fought back, and Harry tried not to feel hurt by his words. He still loved the other Harry. They both did. He couldn't expect them to forget about their real son for him, nor did he want them to.

"You don't have to. I want to go back."

"You-" His mother gave a manic laugh. "You don't know what you want. How could you? After all of that, you're… you're…"

"Fucked in the head?" Harry asked slyly.

"Confused!" She shot back. "You think you want that because it's all you've ever known. But you don't need to live that life any more. You can stay here. You can actually be happy with us in a place where you won't have to watch everyone you love die."

"I've been here, Mum," Harry said as he walked towards her. "I've been living this life for the past three months. This isn't just a rash decision I made when I woke up today, it's something I've been weighing since I first got here. I love you," he reassured her. "And I love Dad. And I love Susan. But this isn't my life. Maybe once, it could have been, but not any more. And I can't keep trying to pretend like it is, I'll lose my mind twice over before I can make that happen. This way, I can go back and do what I'm actually meant to do, live the life I want to live without constantly worrying about disappointing all of you or completely changing the lives that you had already planned out because I suddenly appeared and wanted something different. "

"But what about the life you deserve?" She pleaded. "What could possibly be waiting for you back there? Nothing but pain and death and suffering."

Harry hugged his mother, immediately feeling her tears once she laid her head onto his shoulder. "I have friends there. I have people I care about and who I need in my life. But more than that, I actually have a purpose there. Before I left, I was beginning to feel like I was becoming the best version of myself. Someone who you could look to and actually be proud of. I chased out bloody Voldemort out of my mind and brought him to his knees, Mum," he laughed. "I made the entire wizarding world eat their words. I… I helped people. And I want to keep doing that. I want to go back and truly become that man who you would make you all proud. I want to make myself proud, and live a life where I can be fully myself and actually be happy with who I am."

His mum hugged him tighter. "I don't want to let go."

"I don't want you to let go," he whispered. "But neither of us can live genuinely happy unless you do."

He felt her nod and squeezed a bit harder before he finally let his arms fall. She sniffed, wiping her tears before giving him a long kiss on his cheek. "I love you. Every version of me loves and will always love you. You know that, right?"

"Of course," he kissed her back. "Sorry for being such a mess this summer."

"Nonsense," she waved him off. "You were perfect. I couldn't be happier with my son."

She let him go, hesitantly, and fell into his father's embrace.

"You know I love you, right?" His father asked. "I don't want you to think that just because…"

"I know."

"It's just… he's my son. I couldn't turn my back on him."

"Dad."

"If I could trade my life and make sure you both were here-"

"Dad!" Harry smiled. "I know." Despite himself, he took those two steps forward and hugged them both. He felt the four arms embrace him and smiled. "Thank you both for everything. Meeting you, getting to know you… it was the best part of my summer. I couldn't have wished for better parents."

"Thank you," his father choked out.

His mother just hugged him tighter.

When they let go, he exchanged a final nod with his father before turning to Susan. He had felt her silence just as loud as his mother's shrieks. She stood right by their side looking like a hurt puppy, all small and trembling, and it killed him.

"Susan," he whispered. He tried to walk to her, but she scrambled backward. "Please, just talk to me."

"I… I… This is all just… I can't… It's too…" She looked like she was having a panic attack. She wanted to run and hide, but Harry didn't let her as he all but leaped to her and brought her into his arms. She broke down then, her arms coming around him and clung so hard he felt her nails piercing his skin. "Don't go," she whispered in his ear. "Don't go there. Please don't go there. Please. Please."

"I have to. I can't stay here, Susan. I can't live this life that you want me to live. It wouldn't be fair to either of us for me to try. You deserve better."

"I deserve you," she cried. "I'll change my life. I'll do whatever you want me to do. Just please, don't go. Not there. Don't go back to that place. Please, just stay. I'll make sure you're happy. I'll make you happy, I promise."

"I would ruin your life, Susan," he said roughly. "I would make you miserable every day of your life just to keep you around. How could I ever be happy knowing that?"

"Please," she was begging now. "Please, we can figure this out. We can find a way to fix everything. We can have you here. We can bring back my other Harry. Just let us try, please!"

"Thank you so much," he kissed her face with every sentence. "Thank you for everything. You're perfect. The best girlfriend I could have ever asked for. I love you. A part of me will always love you, Susan. But I need you to let me go. I won't go with you like this. I can't."

"Harry."

"Please, Susan. Tell me it's okay. Tell me you're going to be okay."

She leaned back and looked him right into his eyes. "Just… tell me you'll be okay. Promise me, honestly promise me, that you will never let the world beat you down like that again. Promise me that you'll be happy."

Harry pulled her in and kissed her, putting all the love he felt for her in it, letting her know just how much she meant to him. "I promise," he said.

"I won't forget you," she whispered and kissed him again. "Never. You'll always have a place in my heart, no matter what happens."

Harry nodded, giving her one final kiss as he couldn't muster any more words. He slowly pulled back from her. She looked like she wanted to crumble to the ground. His parents did too. But they were all trying to be strong, holding off just for him to go. He raised his hand, still fully unable to snap his fingers just yet.

"When my counterpart comes around… give him a little hell, will you?" The three of them laughed and Harry felt a teardrop down his cheek. "Let him know how good of a life he actually has."

Harry snapped his fingers, and the world around him became engulfed in flames. Blazing red and gold streaks of fire became everything in sight, and the slightest hints of warmth crept up his collar. Aurora suddenly appeared in front of him, still in human form, though for a moment he caught a quick sight of her flaming wings. She was smiling, but it was filled with sadness.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I know how cruel that was, but I just couldn't bear seeing you like that a second longer. I needed to help you, I need you to understand-"

"Aurora," Harry interrupted calmly. "You gave me a chance to meet my parents, a chance to actually say goodbye. You would have even let me stay if I had been stubborn enough. I don't think that's cruel. I think it's kind."

"You can still hate me if you want. Just a little. I won't mind."

"Believe me, I tried. I guess you're just immune to it. I suppose I'll have to live with that."

She gave a quiet laugh. "So what now?"

"You tell me," Harry said lightly. "Aren't you supposed to be like Fate's gift or something?"

"It doesn't work like that."

"But you do know some things, don't you? You know more about my future than you let on. I was right when I said you had other reasons for putting me in that life, wasn't I?"

"Yes," she replied calmly.

"So what is it?" He asked. "What's going to happen?"

Aurora leaned in before he could process it, and when her lips touched his, his blood was lit ablaze as he felt her presence touch his very soul. It lasted only a second, too little for Harry to be able to kiss back, but even when she pulled back he could still feel her being inside him.

"I'm sorry," she said with a light grin as she cupped his cheek. "Couldn't let you go without knowing how they would feel."

"Aurora," Harry took her hand from his face and held it in between his own. "What do you know?"

"Spoilers, sweetheart."

May 7th, 1996

Hogwarts Infirmary

9:35 a.m.

The first thing he was aware of was the pain. Like a billion tiny lightning bolts striking at the muscles inside his body over and over again. It took an effort to groan. He struggled to even open his eyes, and when he did, the white light of the infirmary was blinding.

He was back home, and he couldn't help but feel happy about it.

"Harry," Theo said from beside him. "Hey, you're alright. You're awake, finally!"

"Malfoy, go get one of the healers," Pansy instructed from his other side.

"Why me? Why can't Blaise go do it?"

"Because I'm still hurt, you moron!" Blaise snapped.

"It's just a cut, mate. If Harry can fight with it, you can walk with it."

"I'll go get the healer," Daphne sighed. "Anything to get me away from you morons."

"Oh, I'll go with you then," Draco said. "My father raised a gentleman, after all."

"The gentleman thing to do would be to go yourself, Malfoy," Theo called out.

"Fuck off, Nott!"

"Must you come too?" Daphne whined.

"Yes!"

Harry heard the two of them arguing until the door to the infirmary opened and closed. Feeling fairly sure Blaise was a few beds away, Harry pushed himself up against the headboard and cried out when his muscles all exploded with pain. "What's wrong with me?" He grunted, managing to open his eyes and see Theo and Pansy sitting on either side of his bed.

"This is what happens when you start drinking potions like their pumpkin juice in a desert," Pansy rolled her eyes. "You're lucky you were unconscious for the past five days, you skipped the worst of it, but it's still going to be like a week before you're back to normal."

"Noted."

"How are you feeling?" Theo asked.

"Good, actually. All things considered." He spotted the silver table at the foot of his bed, it was filled with newspapers stacked on top of each other. "What are they saying now?"

"Oh, well, a lot of things actually," Pansy smiled. "The Prophet wanted to keep dragging your name, using Montague's polyjuiced goon to try and frame you for the attack at Hogwarts. They called you the usual, Junior Serial Killer and Murderous Beast and all the other ones. They even tried to frame you as a Death Eater at one point."

"Of course they did."

"Except the story didn't stick," Theo joined in. "Turns out you made quite a name for yourself the night of the siege. A lot of people saw you helping during the London attacks. There were protests outside the Daily Prophet for days, hundreds of witches and wizards demanding they print out the truth. And once the news of what you did at the Ministry with Voldemort and the phoenix began spreading, they couldn't do much but print a retraction."

"So, what, I'm like a hero now?" Harry groaned. "Again?"

"Not exactly," Theo shrugged.

"You know who runs the Prophet," Pansy said. "They weren't happy when they found out what you did. So they still tried to paint you as a potential danger, someone to look out for. A future Dark Lord of sorts." Pansy grabbed one of the papers and threw it at him. Harry picked it up and immediately recognised the picture. Harry was standing tall over a kneeling Voldemort, a cold smile on his face as Aurora flew proudly above him, her wings burning. The picture was large enough to cover almost half of the front page, the proud headline of HELL'S FIRE sitting right above the image.

"Nice name, huh?" Theo grinned. "They attempted to keep convincing everyone you were this dangerous threat. The name did stick, though not in the way they wanted. The country has started to look to you as their beacon of hope, the saviour from the Death Eater threat. Someone powerful enough to punish the wicked and save the innocent. In their eyes, you are hell's fire personified - the wizard who will make all the snatchers and Death Eaters burn!"

Harry gave a strained smile before setting the paper on the nightstand beside him. He took a deep breath, fully feeling that tight ache coursing through his body. "I can live with that."

That's it for this chapter, thank you all for reading!

And we're finally about to start the final arc of the year!

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