Aurora Borealis

by Star-Of-Radiance

Bella's 'perfect slice of forever' slowly unravels, piece by piece. Months after the confrontation during Breaking Dawn, all the devastating consequences of crimes, both forgotten and overlooked, reveal themselves, and the criminal trials and sentencing of Edward Cullen and the Volturi unfold- along with its equally devastating aftermath. Think carefully before you choose to act...

17. The Way Forwards Bella VIII

"Sometimes the hardest decisions we make are the ones that lead us to the path of growth and self-discovery."

Unknown

Bella

For a long moment, no one spoke.

"Jake… wanted to kill me?" Renesmee's whisper was barely heard.

I couldn't speak- I was too horrified, too sickened with what I had just heard…

It felt like my mind had shut down completely; like I'd had enough.

Because I was certain I had more than enough shocks in less than a week.

Everyone was the same. Until…

"I'm going to kill that mutt!" Rosalie howled, flinging herself to her feet. The rest of us jumped, but Gabrielle- to our surprise- was the first to act. She pointed her wand to the door and we heard locks clicking. How she managed to do that before any of us was beyond me; it was probably the non-human side of her.

Rosalie stared at her. "That's not going to work. Not with me."

"No, but I've cast some spells." Gabrielle confessed, stowing away her wand.

Rosalie growled. "Let me go. I wanna rip that mutt's throat out and crush his-"

"Rosalie," Esme interjected, probably to stop her from saying something explicitly adult, not to mention violent, in front of Renesmee, as hurt as she was, she ddin't need any more shocks. "Please."

"She's right," Gabrielle's eyes, similar in shade to Rosalie's, met hers. "Neither Jacob nor Sam will believe it, and neither will anyone else. They will refuse to believe it, and who can blame them?"

Gabrielle waved a hand over her face. She looked beyond exhausted. "But this is concerning. If Renesmee's safety is a concern- and anyone else's who has been imprinted upon, for that matter-" Quil and the other Wolves flinched. His face was still pinched. "-then it's imperative that we find evidence to back up these claims. And fortunately, I have them on speed-dial."

We stared as Gabrielle whipped out a mobile phone.

"I'm calling the Wolves of the Appalachians and Vermont packs." She explained, as she dialled. "They have never forged a mating-bond or felt the pull with anyone so young before, and they never will. We're all going to need them. Because no matter how scientifically-sound, professionally-sourced and experienced-based the information and evidence I can provide them with are, it's not going to be enough. Especially if they don't want to listen; I have to find back-up evidence."

She paused. "Hello?" A clear voice sounded from the line.

"Hello Vivian," Gabrielle sighed. "I'm sorry to disturb you, but this is an emergency. There is at least one little girl whose safety and future are at stake."

"What?" There was a pause. "What happened?"

"I've encountered and met a new species of Loup-Garou in the Olympic Peninsula in Forks, Washington State." Gabrielle explained. "One of them felt the Pull- the Moon's Draw- with a newborn baby."

There was a moment of silence and then… "WHAT?!"

"It's true." Gabrielle confirmed, grimly. "And what's worse, there is a strong indication that their sense of Pull- which is triggered by a process they call imprinting- is chaotic. If it isn't under-developed, it certainly is over-developed. It's on overdrive. And in the baby's case, it seems to be involuntarily triggered by the guy's severe mental health issues and extreme emotional infatuation with the baby's mother… at least in part."

I felt like vomiting.

"It's true, he was infatuated with the baby's mother. But she chose someone else…" Gabrielle paused. "A vampire."

There was the sound of something dropping on the other end of the line. Gabrielle waited, wincing, until Vivian replied: "What?"

"It's true." Gabrielle repeated. "She had decided to marry a vampire and become one just to join him. But the two of them… conceived a Dhampir, a half-human, half-vampire baby. And the Wolf in question was in such emotional and mental agony that… it triggered his imprinting, his sense of Pull. He felt a draw towards the newly born baby- but it's much more extreme than what any other species appear to have experienced."

"Oh my goddess," came the whisper at the other end of the line.

"I swear, I'm not making this up," Gabrielle stated, grimly. "This is definitely not my idea of a funny joke, and it sadly isn't a misunderstanding. I've had confirmation from more than one pack-member and the child's family. He imprinted on the newborn baby."

She spared us all a pitying glance before continuing. "My theory is that not only was his mental health in such severe straits, if he wasn't mad, he was surely going to be. He himself admitted to his pack-members that his own state of mind wasn't all that great and he was uncertain of whether or not he could be held back from either killing or harming someone he may later regret once he comes back to his senses." We all winced.

"He wasn't able to vent his anguish and rage out onto the baby's parents, not even the vampire father because, well, I believe he didn't truly hate him." I blinked. Everybody else started.

"He didn't hate the father of the child, even though he had taken the girl he believed he was in love with away from him. He wished he did, desperately. After all this was a vampire, his species' ancient enemy. He was the one who 'stole' the girl he 'loved' away from him, married her, sired a hybrid child on her causing a dangerous pregnancy and was about to turn her into a vampire herself, but he couldn't hate the guy because he had earned his respect." I was startled.

"Edward- that was his name- had earned his respect because he was willing to give up the girl he loved in order for her to live a normal life as a human and not miss out of anything." Gabrielle continued. "He even tried once, to give her up, and consented to allowing her to be with the Wolf in question, and saved her life multiple times. So unfortunately, he couldn't really target the vampire, as much as he wanted to. Not even in his internal hatred and suffering." I looked away.

"At the same time, he can't bring himself to hate the mother of the child, no matter what her decisions were, or that she broke his heart and was then forcing him to stay and witness her slowly tear herself apart from within." I buried my face into Renesmee's hair, the scent of it helped calm me. It was odd, now that I was a vampire, I no longer felt my heart pounding as should have.

"So, as you can see the baby was a substitute target," Gabrielle continued. She spoke slowly, I got the sense, so they would be able to comprehend the shocking things that she was saying. No doubt it had never been done before by anyone. "One that was one-half his rival, one-half the girl who broke his heart. But it was not the guy who had earned his respect nor the girl he genuinely believed he loved. He could safely hate the child, the result of their union which had hurt him so much, instead and take his revenge out on her… So, things got from bad to worse. He attempted to kill the baby as soon as it was born, but when he saw the baby's eyes and saw that she had the same eyes as her mother's…" Gabrielle trailed off. "He felt an overwhelming sense of the Moon's Pull, or to be more specific, he imprinted, which was their variation of the Pull."

Renesmee buried her face into my clothes. I could feel the wetness of her tears seeping into the fabric. Her whole body shook and quivered. She started shaking violently.

I understood: it wasn't that she'd wanted to stay and end up with Jacob forever; it was that everything she believed about the man she trusted and once loved as a brother now felt like a lie.

And even her father came into doubt. Even her father's love for her… or even his love for me, her mother.

I swallowed. My eyes blurred in pain. I wished I had never met Jacob, much less flirted with him.

I also wished that I had never met Edward. Except for Renesmee… I would never regret her and maybe it was because of her I became less stupid and less blind. But I regretted the kind of life she had led that I had forced her to endure.

I just dove into an eternal marriage and an existence as a high school student for the rest of eternity and threw my newborn daughter into the arms of my former best friend and one-time infatuation.

And now, I was a vampire; trapped in my own bad choices. I had married him. I had chosen to spend eternity with him. Yet look how he played me: like a fiddle. They both did. And because I was dumb, young and stupid, and thought so badly about myself that I easily felt guilty and ashamed, unable to even stand the look on my mother's face when I once decided I would go to Gran and asked her for help with things around the house, and Renée had panicked and pleaded with me with her wide, baby-blue eyes, not to contact her mother who would make her life a misery for not being good enough. I'd caved in. I did what she'd asked, what she expected me to do. What they all did.

I didn't just go along with their tune; I became obsessed enough to be a vampire- forever young, forever alive, forever by his side...

Forever. I was starting to hate that word.

I sighed, closing my eyes. And now I was beginning to see the results of my own bad choices, my selfishness, my short-sightedness.

My idiocy.

I prayed, that if God would ever hear someone who foolishly gave up her soul to be with a seriously skewed vampire- no, not just that: to be a vampire. I had to admit that immortality along with eternal youth, gracefulness, beauty, strength, super-speed and senses, along with the possibility of powers had appealed to me. It felt like I had traded my own soul for material gain and a love which seemed poisonous and fake even to my previous sense of denial and obliviousness. I prayed fervently for forgiveness- if it wasn't too late. And more than anything, I prayed for my daughter; I prayed that she would be happy and free someday, that she would be safe with people who genuinely cared for her instead of being forced to love her because of an involuntary biological instinct and a previous infatuation with her mother or anyone related to her. If it was too late for me, I prayed with all my heart that if I couldn't be forgiven, much less saved (not that I was expecting to be), then at least my daughter would be spared. That she would be saved.

I had never prayed so hard in my life.

"And the child is now a substitute or a replacement for her mother in his affections- only it is far more obsessive than what regular Wolves feel because of the Pull." Gabrielle's voice darkened. "Even the hormonal and particularly possessive ones." She looked with sad pity towards me and Renesmee.

"Please. I need you to come- some of your Wolves, scientists, archivists, magic-keepers, healers… you name it. This is bad. No one has ever felt the Pull for someone who hasn't even begun puberty before, much less a baby." Quil flinched and swallowed. Renesmee was openly crying now. Esme and Carlisle went over to her and wrapped her in their arms, as did Rosalie and Emmett. Sue's eyes filled with tears as she looked at her, and Leah looked pained and saddened. Seth looked mournful and so did Embry who sighed and shook his head. "And it sure as hell isn't mutual. She's a Dhampir, so she can't feel the Pull, and she's too young besides, she's only nine months old. Plus…" Gabrielle sighed. She looked pained, towards Renesmee. "It is doubtful that she can produce offspring naturally, at least not without extreme difficulty and when she is less than seven years old; she's a Dhampir- while they physically grow much faster, emotionally appears to be different. And she appears to have expressed the desire to be free of this imprint and to live her own life." Sue had now joined the group hug, as did Seth and Leah.

"And the Wolf in question is completely determined not to be apart from her, he appears to be growing paranoid- enough to send some of his Wolves to listen in on her conversations. He's been banned from her grandfather's house." Embry, Quil, Leah and Seth all winced. "And the girl's grandfather doesn't even know that Wolves or vampires exist, but he can tell that something's not right."

"Ho-Ly. Shit." Another voice, a male one, sounded from the other end of the line. Gabrielle blinked. "I'm sorry, who is this?"

Vivian groaned. "It's Ulf. He's with me, right now. I'm sorry, but the Five put us on speaker." Gabrielle clapped a hand to her forehead. "Say no more, we're coming. I'll speak with the others- Gabriel's here anyway; he's heard everything." Gabrielle winced. "It's an emergency after all."

Gabrielle's shoulders sagged. So did the rest of ours. "Thank you, Vivian."

"No thanks needed." Vivian said grimly. "So, Olympic Peninsula, right? You said it was in a town called Forks, Washington?"

"Yes," Gabrielle sighed in relief. "We're on our way. What do you need us to do?"

"For one, formally seek out an alliance, and then provide sufficient proof to back up my claim that something isn't right." Gabrielle confessed. We were temporarily distracted by the confusion. Not me so much, though; I was still preoccupied with comforting my inconsolably crying and shaking daughter. Esme's newly-honey-brown eyes shimmered. "Not just to the Alphas- there are two packs and one of them is the guy who felt the Pull." Someone swore in the background. "But also to the Council of Elders." Sue nodded.

"What? They didn't think anything was wrong?" Vivian's voice was utterly incredulous.

Gabrielle sighed. "It's a long story. But basically, their species appear to only have recently evolved to phase into Wolves. I don't know the exact details but one of the tribal Elders tell me that all the Wolves here descend from a single common ancestor. They appear to be evolving at a rapid pace as well. They have dozens of members, it's much larger than your pack, but nowhere near as large as the ones in New Orleans or the Appalachians. But there are only males here, with the exception of one female."

"What?! That doesn't make sense!" A chorus of denials and sounds of disbelief were heard in the background.

"No, but I can explain much better once you get here." Gabrielle confessed. She groaned. "Please Vivian. You remember about the case I sent the email to you about?"

"The vampire species whose government is arrested by the rest of their kind?"

"Yeah, I'm still working on that case." Gabrielle stated dryly. "And now I've uncovered this. The girl's family has been involved in this. Her father has been arrested too. I still don't know how I'm going to split my time between the Carpathians and here in North America, even with magical travel. The trials haven't even started."

"Would you like us to wait, then?" A man's timbre sounded from the other end of the line.

Gabrielle turned towards the rest of us. "Can you all keep a secret from him? And Sam? Anyone who could or will tell to them?"

The Wolves all looked at each other hesitantly.

"We have to try," Sue decided, fervently. The others all nodded.

"We have to," Gabrielle agreed grimly. "Otherwise, Jacob will do anything and everything he could if he feels that he will lose his 'soulmate' and the bond between them is threatened."

"WHAT?!" More than one voice sounded from the other end of the line.

"Their sense of Pull appears to be overwhelmingly powerful." Gabrielle stated grimly, returning back to the call. "It's something to do with their evolutionary process: the current generation of Loup-Garoux are much larger than their grandfather's. They're the size of barnyard horses in their Wolf forms." I could practically hear the jaws dropping on the other end of the line. "But it's sporadic; inconsistent. Worryingly so. You see, the generations before- the fathers and grandfathers of the current pack-members- they never phased."

A stunned silence, almost horrified, filled the other end.

"The generation before, the great-grandfathers of the Wolves did phase. But there were only a few members, a handful at most, not the dozens that their great-grandchildren consist of today." Gabrielle clarified. "So therefore, I believe that the gene within them, which goes sporadically dormant for two generations and awakens with the third, and which only seems to trigger itself awake due to the presence of vampires, even the ones who have no intent to harm anyone like the girl's family, before going on complete over-drive."

Sue sighed, shaking her head. Now that we had someone pointing it out, someone who was familiar with their kind, of all species, as well as theirs, it just seemed too obvious.

"And there's never been a female Loup-Garou in the entire history of their species. Until now. Now, there's one."

"No women?" Someone, a male, hoarsely asked. "No females... but how?"

"They mated and felt the Pull with human females." Gabrielle explained.

"But humans can't feel the Pull! Some species might be able to reproduce with them, but they've never felt the Pull!"

"No," Gabrielle agreed to Vivian's exclamation. "They can't. And the reason for this is because I believe that they have only fairly recently evolved to become Loup-Garou as compared to other species, including yours. Centuries are nothing in the timeline of evolution; at least millennia is required for the transition to be complete, or at least advanced far enough. And it seems that they are descended from only one common ancestor, who first shifted into a wolf mere centuries ago. It hasn't settled but it's newly emerged and forced to contend with hostile vampires and whatever else the supernatural has in store against them. So the gene goes into extreme overdrive in order to evolve so it can catch up to the rest of the Loup-Garou species." She looked at Quileutes in the room pointedly. "And this includes on imprinting, their variation of the Moon's Pull. Since they've never made contact with another species of Loup-Garou, like yours, they've had to mate with ordinary humans whose genome is elastic and therefore are still able to pass them down. Because there were only humans available for them to mate with- humans who can't feel the Pull, their innate biological instincts, which are driven to catch up and evolve fast enough with the rest of you, goes on the extreme: they are driven to be with that person, no matter the odds or reasoning. Even if either party is in already in a committed relationship, or if the human- or in this case, Dhampir- is underage and unable to give her consent. And since the first one to phase was a male, it took some time before spreading onto any female descendants, particularly if there weren't other Loup-Garou nearby. I think the one female here can use some... woman's guidance in being a female Loup-Garou." Leah blushed. "especially if we count the fact that other females will be phasing soon enough. Remember, your pack initially came from two species: one from France and another from Germany. Your ancestors merged together and combined each other's traits in their resulting descendants- that's a luxury they haven't been able to afford due to their isolation."

Gabrielle looked at Sue questioningly when she said this. Sue sighed, placing her hand to her forehead, and nodded.

"So therefore, there have only been human females that were not closely related to them who were capable of producing healthy offspring for any of the new Wolves." she let them absorb what I thought might be shocking to them. "And because of that, even though they brought fresh blood, so to speak, and were able to pass down the gene, my theory is that it's precisely because of the predominant human traits that their variation of the Loup-Garou gene is forced to become dormant. They're a recent and isolated species, Vivian, and it looks like they have yet to meet any Loup-Garou who is not one of them. Therefore..."

"So it's because that they haven't met any of the rest of our kind, including our species, that their mating prospects are solely limited to humans until one of them was heartbroken and desperate enough to commit murder on a newborn, so the gene turned it around?" Vivian summed it up slowly. Everyone winced.

"Most certainly." Gabrielle agreed. "Until this whole mess, which led to the scorned former love interest feeling the Pull towards not only a newborn baby, but a Dhampir who is unlikely to reproduce, at least not to the same level of your kind, and certainly will not pass down the Loup-Garou gene. But leaving that aside, their inborn instincts does require them to expand their gene pool, so even when they've finally had their first female Loup-Garou..." Gabrielle sighed.

"Now, as you've pointed out, humans can't feel the Pull. Neither can Dhampyr and underage children. So it's doubtful that any of their Pulls are mutual- yet it's so overwhelmingly strong that each Wolf who does imprint instinctively believes the girl they set eyes on is their soulmate and does whatever they can to pursue them. No matter if it isn't mutual or desired. Much less consensual."

More silence. I could only imagine how this felt to them. I could hear them practically inhaling in shock.

"Oh my goddess." came the shocked breath from the other end of the line. "Gabrielle... How is this...?" Vivian trailed off, sounding sick. "It's so..."

"Messed up?" Another voice, a male one, suggested. Gabrielle sighed.

"Things are a mess and could potentially be disastrous." She admitted. Gabrielle rubbed her forehead. "I do know that every once in a while, a minor coven or family-unit of vampires comes along to settle in this town. They have a treaty with the Wolves here: they would stay away and out of Quileute tribal lands- as the packs are the protectors and guardians of the Quileutes- and they would not harm or bite any human, nor trespass and into their homes. The family here doesn't feed on humans- only animals. In return, they would simply be allowed to stay until it was time for them to leave- before the human population notices that they aren't aging. They come back about every second generation or so. They weren't here for the previous generation, so the fathers of the current pack-members never phased, unlike their grandparents."

There was a stunned silence. I knew it still wouldn't make sense to them. "Something's wrong." The deep male voice stated.

"Yes." Gabrielle agreed. "Which is why I am asking you, as fellow Loup-Garoux, hereditary werewolves, please help. Not for me, but for another species, a newly emerged breed of Homo Lupus." She stressed. "Plus, they're also... newly emerged. Not at all allied or aligned with any of their own kind. If anything of the supernatural, or even the non-magical human feds comes knocking at their door..." she trailed off. Some of us winced, even me, though I was still trying to still and soothe my helplessly crying daughter.

"You'd best contact members of the Appalachians pack," the male timbre stated. "I don't think the Crescent Pack in New Orleans will help- I don't trust them." I could practically hear his scowl.

"No, neither do I. Anyone who can target a baby, including one of their own kind, and kill her and her parents simply to remove a potential rival in a power-struggle, is out of the question." Gabrielle said firmly. I and the others fervently agreed. "But your help would be most appreciated." She looked to Sue.

"Would you be interested in speaking to one of the tribal Elders?"

"Yes, that would be wise." The male sounded. It sounded like he was the Alpha- Gabriel if I remembered correctly. Sue stood and took the phone.

---

Gabrielle looked at the Wolves.

"I'm going to contact members of the Appalachians pack. Now, you're probably wondering what should be done about this. I have a valid reason to believe that your sense of Pull- your imprinting- is on over-drive. Because your species needs to continuously evolve and expand on its own, but it typically depends upon the presence of vampires to trigger the gene, then progress and growth is slow, but determined- desperate, even. Hence why your generation are bigger- much bigger than all the other Wolves of the previous generation. Why one generation no one phased and the next there are dozens. Soon, there may likely be hundreds, but the growth has to be consistent."

Every single one of us were stunned. Hundreds? Of Quileute Wolves? All of them descended from Taha Aki?

Gabrielle nodded, lovely face filled with grim certainty. "Like I said, being the guardians of the Quileute people tends to set you apart from even the rest of them. The same way the Nunnehi and the Cherokee are closely intertwined and protect them fervently, but are not the same. You will always be Quileutes. It is in your blood. Your very soul. But you are also Loup-Garoux- hereditary werewolves. And you were chosen for this task. Fate has chosen you. Taha Aki, your ancestor, has guided you here." Gabrielle's violet-blue eyes seemed to glow with an unearthly light as she looked solemnly into the eyes of each of the Wolves. "There are set-backs and hurdles, but that is how it has always been. They are not insurmountable.

"As for your imprinting... you have to understand that there is something wrong." Gabrielle closed her eyes for a second and then breathed deeply. "What you feel should not convince you that the other person is your soulmate- but a potential mate. Someone you may have a future with, someone whom you may have a good chance of being with forever, someday. But you shouldn't immediately believe that the other person is your soulmate on sight- especially since they may or may not feel the same way, especially at first, even if they change their minds later." Quil's face was grey, his eyes haunted and black as he nodded.

"Even if they grow attached to you because of this afterwards... there is something wrong." She looked at Leah. "Was Emily with someone when Sam imprinted?"

Leah shook her head. "No, she just got out of a bad relationship. A really bad one. That boy... he was really awful." She shook her head, wincing.

"So this may have affected Emily negatively?" Gabrielle pressed.

Leah hesitated. "I believe so. I mean, she just broke up. I was so happy, so relieved for her when it was over, though."

"Hm." Gabrielle looked thoughtful. "And what of Sam's relationship with Emily then? Did they ever meet before he phased?"

Leah nodded. "Yeah. He knew her as my cousin who was more like my sister... my best friend." She hesitated. I felt a stab of sympathy for Leah. "Sam didn't like Daniel, either. He found him... jerkish and self-absorbed, like I did. Rude and arrogant. He was condescending towards everyone, including Emily, humiliating her even in front of other people and being all condescending yet faux-polite and pretentiously kind." Her voice dripped with contempt. To my surprise, she looked right at me. "The way Edward did with you. Gas-lighting. That's how I learned the term."

The other Wolves started. I stared. "So Emily's boyfriend was emotionally and psychologically abusive?" Gabrielle mused.

Leah grimaced. "Not to the same extent as either Jacob or Edward."

"Of course not." Gabrielle sighed, closing her eyes. "Few have ever gone that far. But yes, it was definitely abuse. Did she date anyone else afterwards? Or did she remain single before Sam imprinted."

"Casual dating." Leah stared. "She went on a few blind dates, but couldn't really find anyone to settle with. Why?"

"I believe that Sam's Pull instinct triggered, as he was most definitely interested and wanted a future with you, but couldn't; he wasn't able to due to your biological relation." Everybody grimaced. "At the same time, there was Emily. Emily who was close to you, who knew you. Emily who likely resembled you, somewhat. Emily who was even related to you, but not to Sam. Who may have been similar in terms of temperament to you. And someone who had just gotten out of a terrible relationship with an emotionally and psychologically abusive boyfriend and who now felt vulnerable and desperate, whose self-esteem had been torn to shreds and stomped on. Someone who felt like she needed someone, some support, and was lonely. Who sought to move on with her life and become the caring wife and, possibly, mother that she'd always dreamed. Someone who may have secretly longed for- not for Sam, but what you and Sam had together." Leah's eyes widened and she, Seth and Embry gasped. "But unlike Bella, she didn't have anyone particular in mind. She'd moved on from her abusive boyfriend and already understood and accepted that he was bad for her. She had no desire, whatsoever, to go back. But she didn't know how or who to move forward with.

"And the gene sensed that, just as the magical human gene sensed the level of hostility and bigotry within the uncle of the magical boy and his blood-family. So it went on over-drive; going so far and becoming so overwhelming that Sam instinctively believed Emily to be his soulmate and drove him to the lengths I am guessing he went through, just to win her, despite her close emotional and familial ties to you, and his own prior ones. Or perhaps..." she trailed off. "It was because of his prior attachment and loyalty to you, as well as her own attachment and loyalty to the girl she saw as her sister; that's what pushed Sam's Pull instinct to go on overdrive when he imprinted. As humans can't feel the Pull, Sam was in love with you, or at least infatuated, and Emily also saw you as her sister, Sam's instincts pushed him almost or seemingly over the edge to win her heart and convince her to be with him, so they could both forget about all the obstacles, or at least see their mutual connection and the feelings that may develop as being impossible to bypass or ignore."

I could feel everybody in the room inhale a sharp gasp.

"And I believe that the same thing may have happened to the other Quileute Wolves who have imprinted." Gabrielle murmured, gravely. The Quileutes and the Cullens stood horrified as they listened. Her luminous violet-blue eyes seemed unbelievably sad as she gazed at Leah. "Because of the issues Sam faced: he wanted to be with you but was unable to sire healthy offspring with you, it's possible that the other Pull instincts of your species and packs went on overdrive as well, in order to prevent any similar past ties and loyalties preventing or even distracting them from wooing and pursuing their potential mates and moving on from anything that might prove an obstacle or a distraction to that goal; so much so that they instantly believed, quite strongly judging by the sounds of things, that their imprints were immediately their soulmates."

I couldn't speak. I was too horrified; Sam and Emily... all this time, the reason why I accepted Jake's bond with my daughter, even though she was an infant...

"It was certainly this way for Jacob. Jacob's case, however, might be even worse than Sam, due to his emotional and mental turmoil. If Bella was truly an eligible mate for him as a human then he would have imprinted on her, make no mistake. It certainly would make more sense, especially as she felt similar emotions of loneliness, turmoil and the destruction of her own self-confidence and already-fragile self-esteem. But their relationship was never healthy, not from the start. Not on her part- she was already obsessed with and longed for Edward, even when he was gone, and she was occupied with Jacob. And deny it as he might, refuse to acknowledge it even, Jacob knew that, deep down." I immediately shrank backwards. Gabrielle turned towards me. Her violet-blue eyes held an unreadable expression that struck like lightning. "He could never match up to Edward in your eyes. At best Jacob was technically seen, even subconsciously, as a mere distraction or a substitute." I flinched. "And the gene knew that. The magic within that searched for anyone who could be Jacob's mate sensed it. Especially as when you both first met- that you could remember- the only reason you flirted with him was to get information on the Cullens- like why they didn't come to La Push." I felt like I'd been dealt with a hard punch to the face. A well-deserved one.

"To Jacob... I do not believe he truly saw or knew her for herself, any more than she did." Gabrielle now addressed the rest of the audience. "Not only had either of them barely knew each other and she certainly never took the initiative to search for him before Edward had left, even as friends," I cringed "but you have to understand... the two of you played with each other, even unintentionally." She looked back towards me. "You played with each other's emotions and minds, without truly knowing of the damage it was doing to one another- and to Edward, I am also guessing. That is not healthy for any relationship; even mere platonic friendship."

I nodded, swallowing. My eyes stung. I felt I deserved a slap, at the very least. In truth, I felt I deserved worse. I prayed fervently that there was a way for all of us to get out of this mess. This mess that I'd helped create. That Jacob and Renesmee would both learn to be happy... without each other.

"And since he already saw Renesmee as a substitute target for both you and Edward, someone he could hurt in order to hurt both of you for hurting him-" I winced. "Even just to vent out his anger and heartbreak, it wasn't hard for the magic within the gene, the magic that saw the Quileutes descended from Taha Aki as protectors of the innocent and helpless, to immediately decide turn things around completely." At our bewildered looks, Gabrielle explained:

"He saw your eyes on her. That was the last thing he observed before he imprinted." She insisted. "That was what triggered the Pull instinct. Because he was in such desperate emotional agony that his mental state was in truly dire straits to everyone including himself. He wanted to kill her- ask yourself, would the Jacob you all know do something like this? Would he ever take out his pain and anger on somebody's newborn baby simply because of a grudge he held against their parents? Or would he even take out his anger, his pain and rage on somebody's relative just because their family members hurt him?" We inhaled in shock. The Wolves all turned pale, and so did Sue. Slowly, they all either shook their heads or, in Sue's case, had eyes filled with denial.

"Would he- despite the forced kiss and the emotional blackmail- truly ever go that far?"

That last question wasn't directed at me. Gabrielle was looking at all the Quileutes. Every one of them was silent for a long while. Then, slowly, they all shook their heads.

"And if I am guessing correctly, the reason he now believes he was attracted to you in the first place is because he was destined to be with your daughter after all, after you had given birth to her," Gabrielle stated bluntly, causing most of them to grimace. I swallowed, and nodded. Renesmee was still pressed at my side. She was still crying, shaking slightly, but her sobs had subsided. "Even though he had been attracted to you long before her conception, when you and Edward first hadn't started dating officially and then broken up- and it seemed then to all the world, including Jacob, that he wasn't coming back for you. That doesn't make sense, but he doesn't think about it. To him after the imprinting, you were simply a means to obtain his ultimate 'soulmate'. His so-called 'destiny'."

Everybody looked appalled. Quil's face was even paler and more ashen than before. Leah, Sue and Seth appeared horrified. Embry closed his eyes in horror and despair.

I swallowed. "He said... he said they were meant to be together, even before she was born." I brushed aside my own personal feelings of betrayal. A flash of memories flooded through me. "When I was pregnant I desperately needed him by my side. I couldn't be parted from him. I didn't know why- he told me afterwards that it was Renesmee..." My voice, already weak, trailed off when I saw Gabrielle shook her head.

"Unlikely for both cases." Gabrielle muttered. "Judging by his perceived logic, if he was truly meant to be with your future daughter before and during your pregnancy as well as after, why then, before her conception, did Jacob not feel drawn towards Edward as well, even in a non-romantic fashion?" Emmett smothered a snort. "The child's future father? One half of her genetic make-up, even if he was a vampire? If the reason he was ever attracted to you in the first place was for you to produce his 'soulmate' and the future mother of his children, then why did he not feel the same way towards Edward, your daughter's other parent?" She challenged. "Because it wasn't true. The Pull- the imprint- made him believe this after he had imprinted, to make things logical and easier for him to accept. It was also what he wanted to believe. But what did Jacob truly know about pregnancy, even you had a normal one?" She asked.

I stared. "What are you saying?" I whispered.

"Pregnancy, Bella. Even if you were having a completely normal pregnancy with zero complications and a purely human baby, you would still be hormonal." I gasped. I could hear the others do the same around me. Carlisle groaned. "And judging by your own admission, your own husband did not support you, emotionally and mentally, throughout your pregnancy. In fact, he even sought to sabotage your pregnancy and the safety of your own body, mind and spirit, along with that of your baby. So, you sought comfort and protection with Rosalie and Esme from him, because of your natural instincts- what some would refer to as your 'nesting instincts'- that is, your desire to find a safe and comfortable place and refuge for you and Renesmee, so you could carry and have your baby in peace and in a safe place. That's the instinct of just about every expectant mother, and I suspect that because this baby was one-half of the supernatural, your nesting instincts, your sense of danger and desperation to find a safe place and feel a sense of safety- of comfort- would have only been heightened. Yet, your own husband, Edward did not help make you feel more at ease with your choice, nor did he try to give you comfort. You knew about his intentions and consequently did not feel that your child was safe around him- at least not at first. You didn't trust him to be near you, alone with you, even, without Rosalie or Esme's protection. So, Edward, feeling resentful of this, used your own feelings of guilt at making him unhappy to manipulate you and serve what he believed was truly right and best for you- or rather, again, his own ends. And even after he started accepting this child, you were still uneasy, deep down. As much as you did not wish to acknowledge, much less voice it out loud, you didn't fully trust him." I recoiled.

Memories flashed through my brain. It was more difficult, because of what Lady Laima said about human memories in comparison to vampire ones, but also because I suspected the emotional and physical pain of those days had been so intense.

"Carlisle and I will always be in your sight, Rosalie." Edward said, his voice, dead and emotionless for the most part since we'd returned, cracking, showing his fury and hurt through the edges. "We're the ones she's afraid of."

He knew I'd be beating myself up over his hurt feelings and his anguish to see me in so much pain, my life in danger. I wondered, was this natural, second-nature to him, like breathing was for humans? Or did he actively intentionally do it?

It seemed that guilt was an emotion that Edward played with most often: not just with me and Renesmee, but Jasper, Carlisle and the rest of the family.

"And you were truly afraid of him." Gabrielle was saying, despite the horror and despair rising within me. "You were afraid that he would do something, or that he would hate the baby even more if you expressed the slightest bit of discomfort or even complained about having back-pain." She gave me a knowing look. "Much less cry and become hormonal."

At everyone's horrified states, Embry whispered hoarsely, "This is crazy. If it was just pregnancy hormones, then why did Bella grow all attached to Jacob? I mean, I can understand why she would be scared of Edward back then, but why Jake? He wanted the same thing: for her to get an abortion." Renesmee flinched violently, and I could see Embry's eyes fall onto her with instant regret.

Gabrielle looked straight at me. "I think you know why. You certainly must remember what you felt like- what Jacob provided you with- during your stressful pregnancy."

I couldn't speak.

"You sought comfort, didn't you?" Gabrielle asked, gently. "You sought, if not protection and emotional support- which I fully doubt that Jacob would have given you, considering everyone's, including your own, admissions about his feelings about your pregnancy and unborn baby-" I flinched "-then he would have provided some form of distraction. Some relief, an escape which your resentful and bitter husband decidedly did not."

Seth groaned. I was too stunned to speak.

I was aghast. How could I not have- how could I not have known this? Jacob had been wise-cracking and making sarcastic little jokes that always broke the tension. It never failed to make me feel nothing less than relief. And distraction; even now, I remembered that I sought some form of distraction, an escape, which Jacob with his good humour, sarcastic jokes and banter with Rosalie provided me with, in ways that Edward never could.

I also hoped, rather naïvely, that by being more cheerful, the two of them would forget or start to rethink their belief that my baby was a monster. And it certainly helped whenever Jacob was around. It made me still in shock: I realised that I'd instinctively sought Jacob's presence to break the tension and provide some relief or distraction in order to protect my baby, not just for myself.

Gabrielle answered my unspoken realisation and understanding. "I think you were all so focused on the supernatural aspects of your pregnancy that you completely forgot about the regular aspects of it." She shook her head. "Even if you were having a normal pregnancy, you would have been stressed, crying, constantly having mood swings... did you have cravings when you were pregnant? Apart from your need for human blood, did you crave any solid foods?"

My mouth was dry. "Uh, yeah." I managed not to croak. "I wanted eggs."

Gabrielle nodded. "So Edward did not support you throughout the pregnancy, emotionally and psychologically. In fact, he may even still be gas-lighting you at that stage, exacerbating your feelings of guilt at putting him through so much pain and worry. So while you were wise enough to ensure that Rosalie and Esme were there to shield you and your baby from him at all times, he was still pushing your buttons, so to speak." The Cullens all winced.

"And while Jacob was the same, outwardly he masked his own pain better. And you knew Edward wanted you to have an abortion from the very start, and more importantly, that he was capable of enforcing it against or without your permission. As much as you couldn't bring yourself to stand your ground and to stand up to him, you knew deep down what he was truly capable of and wanted to do to you and to your precious baby. But while you closed your eyes to his admittedly malicious intent, you were smart enough to take precaution and not to overly trust him. In fact, the reason that you sought for and received Rosalie and Esme's protections was because you strongly feared that he would try something once your back was turned and you were vulnerable and helpless, unable to fight back, especially in your state. And he did, didn't he? He immediately began making arrangements, not just for your flight back, but for an abortion, without even so much as breathing a word to you about anything. He certainly didn't ask what you wanted to do; and you knew that he certainly would have forced an abortion on your own body and terminate your unborn child against your will, if he felt that it was necessary." Esme's face looked ashen, and so did Carlisle's. Rosalie's eyes were wide, Alice blanched, Jasper and Emmett both looked sick.

Gabrielle looked at Carlisle. "Did Edward even put Bella on the phone after he made the decision to abort and asked you for your aid in doing so, if he did? Did either of you ask her what she wanted? Or did he immediately decide to go and push through with an abortion?" Carlisle slowly shook his head. Grief, shock, pain and sorrow was written all over his face. But no denial. It was as if he'd been forced to face the facts of what his son had turned into.

"So yet again, Edward made serious decisions regarding Bella herself, including in matters of her own safety, without so much as consulting her. He jumped the gun, as American No-Majs would say." She shook her head, seemingly disappointed. "It was too much to ask for, to hear even the slightest bit of feelings she had, even if it had been a case of her actually agreeing with him instead of disagreeing with his plans. But Edward would never have known anything you actually felt or wanted until you landed back home because he never so much as tried to communicate with you, to understand your feelings, or even hear what they were and what you had to say. And even after you made your feelings clear with Rosalie, even with your plan to go through with what the two of you- and the rest of the family- had agreed beforehand, before you even became pregnant: turning you into a vampire... Even with that plan, even knowing that it could save your life... he didn't care to even listen. Even knowing that you could be saved. So it wasn't just about your life being in peril, was it?"

I was sure my face was no better than Carlisle's or Esme's.

"What are you saying?" I whispered through frozen lips. I gathered my daughter's quieter form towards me.

"Edward knew." Gabrielle sighed. She gave me a look and then looked pointedly at Carlisle and Esme. "That was your plan all along, wasn't it? To turn into a vampire. It was something the entire family, including the both of you, had previously agreed on before you even became pregnant. And afterwards, you still wanted to go through with it, especially after you became pregnant as you also knew that it could save you from dying. Yet he still wanted to terminate your pregnancy. So it wasn't your potential demise that Edward was anxious and truly desperate to prevent."

I reeled back, belatedly remembering Renesmee. Instantly, I looked down, but she didn't seem to react. Her face was buried within my hair and clothing.

"He couldn't even bring himself to care about what you felt, or even that there was a means of saving your life, so it wasn't even about your safety. He couldn't bring himself to even stomach the idea of having this child." Gabrielle stood frozen. Slowly, she turned towards the other Cullens. "He had already decided she would be a monster without even knowing her, even though he knew there was a way to save Bella. It wasn't about Bella's life: it was more about preserving her as a human, the way he wanted or perceived her as being, as opposed to what she truly wished and felt or felt like."

Ice flooded my veins. I trembled.

"And the fact is that the impending arrival of this baby threatened that very existence: your status as a human." I reeled back as if struck. Gabrielle looked at each of us, with the exception of Renesmee. "You said that when you all voted for her to be turned, after the Volturi insisted that you would be and allowed you to leave, that Edward voted against your transformation. Even knowing Bella's own wishes. Even though that was the condition that the Volturi permitted the three of you- Alice, Edward and Bella- to leave their citadel instead of executing any of you. Or punishing the rest of the family for being complicit in threatening their exposure by allowing and encouraging his relationship with a human girl. Edward knew that the Volturi would come here to ensure their orders would be carried out. In fact, they may have even been keeping tabs on you all back then." The Cullens all paled and recoiled, whereas the Quileutes looked uneasy or even queasy. "Or not, otherwise the Wolves would have sensed them and you would have known they were here. But that would speak for their incompetence and corruption more than anything. But it was still too risky: the Volturi could have kept tabs via listening in to the gossip to and from the people in town and Port Angeles.

"Yet he was still so determinedly insistent that she remain a human, against even her own feelings." Gabrielle said, grimly. "Knowing what this would do to her, after he forcibly broke up with her. And then they were married." She looked sadly at me. "Did he change? Even after he accepted your child and your subsequent transformation, as it was the only thing that would save your life... Has he stopped ignoring your feelings and wishes? How about your daughter's?"

I was silent. So was everybody else.

"He hasn't changed one bit, has he?" Gabrielle asked, quietly. "Abusers and arrogant youngsters who believe they know it all... these are the types of people who are destined to die prematurely because they are unable to accept that they do not know it all, and they never will. He hasn't changed Bella; he may have changed his mind about keeping the baby afterwards, he may have even changed his mind about having you as a vampire being not so bad as he initially believed. But why did he even believe it in the first place? Was it just because he didn't want you to miss out on human experiences?" She shook her head. "That's not true, is it? Otherwise, he wouldn't have had you dressed up and taken you to the prom, just as you'd never wanted. That wasn't your idea of living your human life to the fullest, or even having a good time." I felt myself growing even colder.

Gabrielle looked at me sadly. "What's the point of being human if you can't choose anything on your own, without interference? What's the point of living, rather than existing as Edward claimed immortality does to you, if all your choices go out the window and somebody else makes those decisions for you? Was the prom, the birthday party, the uncomfortable dresses and high-heeled shoes, the sports cars truly your idea of a good life? Of living, rather than just existing? Was the birthday party and the prom your idea of having a good time or a good birthday? Or even a good date?"

There was no sound with the exception of Alice brokenly sobbing at the other end of the room.

"He hasn't changed one bit, has he?" Gabrielle repeated softly, haunting violet-blue eyes gazing sadly at me. "He hasn't grown up emotionally despite having countless decades to his name. Nor is he any less emotionally and psychologically damaging to anyone- more so, I would say, now that it's not simply you but your daughter whose safety and well-being is at stake. He is not reliable and cannot be trusted."

I couldn't speak. Carlisle did it for me. Carlisle, who looked as close to being grey as a vampire could get. "He only... he only thought about what he believed was best for- he only wanted to save-"

"Save her?" Gabrielle shook her head in incredulity. And then something grew in her beautiful face: it was anger. Fury. It shocked me. Ever since we'd met, she'd only ever been calm and even-tempered to anyone, vampires, werewolves, wizards, even Edward. And I was willing to bet that when she went to Volterra, she requested the Volturi's surrender peacefully before she gave the Death Dealers the green light when they refused and possibly tried to attack her.

"Was that what you were going to say?" Gabrielle asked, her voice dangerous, her eyes flashing like violet flashlights. "How could he possibly have saved her? A forced abortion- an abortion made and taken without the woman's consent- is a violation of a person's body as much as rape." We gasped. "It's true, even non-magicals throughout the world believe it. The poor women who have undergone such things certainly act like it; the effects are beyond traumatising, too terrible to comprehend. And you once said that his biological mother surrendered all chances of survival simply to try and nurse him back to health; and that his mother now once attempted suicide because her son died." Esme flinched violently. "Imagine if he forced that pain onto Bella; do any of you think that the events of his breaking up with her in the woods and the aftermath would be anything in comparison to forcing her to endure the loss of her own child? Has any parent truly gotten over the death of their child? Has the pain disappeared completely, even after all this time?" She looked directly at Esme.

Swallowing, Esme shook her head. She took a shaky breath and pressed her lips together to keep from crying. Gabrielle turned back to me.

"Would you forgive him? If he had, against all odds, managed to do what he planned to do: knocking you unconscious and aborting your child despite your explicit wishes and consent, would you be able to get over any of this?" She pressed. We were silent. She reiterated her question.

"Would you have forgiven him if he had succeeded?"

I flinched like I'd been slapped. If I were still human, I was certain tears would be rolling streams from my eyes, like Esme. I was stunned speechless. I couldn't speak.

I couldn't deny it anymore.

She was right. I would never have forgiven either of them, Edward or Jacob, if they had managed to succeed in what they had planned: terminating my baby, without my consent no less, or murdering her as soon as she was born. I would never have wanted anything to do with them afterwards. Even if they had gained my consent, I would never have been happy about terminating my baby. I would never even have wished to look at either of them again, ever. I wouldn't have been able to stand the sight of them. Either of them. I doubted I would be able to stand the sight of myself, knowing that I'd trusted them. That I'd even loved them. That I'd been fooled and totally blindsided by either of them. No amount of beauty that vampirism and immortality was capable of bestowing on me could ever erase the ugly truth of my idiocy, my weakness and my cowardice. That instead of being better, by becoming a vampire, I'd failed. I would have failed both myself and my baby. I would've hated the very sight of myself, my inhuman beauty, a mark of my immortality, knowing that it failed to save her, to save us both.

And my father too, apparently. I'd chosen my love of Edward over sticking with Charlie. With my father. And my Gran Marie, as well: she would have been completely disappointed in how I'd turned out to be: just like Renée, only worse.

Gabrielle shook her head. All traces of fury on her face suddenly vanished, replaced by sudden weariness, sadness and disappointment. She rubbed her hand over her face. "You keep making excuses for him. You believe that he loves her... this isn't love. What he has done, what he was prepared to do to her... wasn't love. Not by a long shot." She said sadly, looking, for all the world, that she was truly disappointed.

She looked back at us with a saddened, sorrowful and disappointed gaze. "How could none of you have ever seen that? How could none of you have pointed out that what he was willing to do- and all the things he has done- was not love?" Her eyes settled on Alice, who was deliberately pressing herself into the corner, looking like she was desperately trying not to cry. At the sight of Gabrielle's disappointed and saddened gaze, she buried her face into Jasper's shirt. He put his arms around her, but said nothing. Jasper's face was drawn, but silent.

Gabrielle looked at my stricken face. "He has crossed a line; deliberately crossed and trampled on it long ago, so many times over... the only reason he was saved from his own terrible mistakes, from his endangerment of you in the woods and Volterra, to his attempt at forced abortion... is because of other people." She looked at Rosalie. "Forced abortion itself is against all medical laws and ethics." She looked at Carlisle. "I do not like to judge people. You've seen me interact with him." That wasn't a question. "Did I immediately start blaming him, pointing fingers and calling him- or any of you guilty?" Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie and even Jasper and Alice shook their heads. I looked down.

"But what he has done, in regards to you and your daughter- this crosses a line. This shows just how far he was willing to go- deliberately ignoring all your feelings and any form of respect towards your own body, not just your thoughts and opinions- to the point where he was ready and willing to violate your very body-" we all inhaled sharply "-to force a traumatic action with damaging psychological and emotional impact in its aftermath. Damage which would have been as equally harmful as any physical violence. Even with anaesthesia." She looked at Carlisle.

"There is a reason why forced abortion, or even abortion without explicit consent of the pregnant woman beforehand- regardless of whether if one is pro-choice or pro-life- is against ALL medical laws and ethics. It would have been a violation of your own Hippocratic oath as a doctor. Did you at least tell him that?"

Carlisle sighed. "I tried. I spoke to him. I tried to get a word in edge-wise. He was incoherent, rambling on about how this was for Bella, for her own safety, how it was necessary... I told him that it was her choice to make. He was furious. Rosalie and Esme stuck beside Bella at all times. They protected her. He..." Carlisle swallowed. "He tried to convince me to knock her unconscious with anesthesia and abort the baby, but I calmly made the same case and I also pointed out to Esme and Rosalie." Carlisle looked gratefully at the two of them. "And how Emmett supported them both. He was completely beyond reason, but he couldn't do anything."

I found myself speaking, "Jacob wanted you to do that too, didn't he?" My voice was a whisper. I looked at him. "I remember the two of them going outside for a discussion as soon as Jacob discovered my pregnancy."

Carlisle nodded, face drawn. "Yes. He later asked me why it wasn't done already." His eyes were sad. "I'm so sorry, Bella." If they could, it looked as if his eyes would've shimmered with tears.

So Jacob had not only known and supported Edward's idea, he thought it was also a good idea to plan and encourage this behind my back; to force an abortion on me, if necessary: to violate my own body- again. In fact, I bet that he was willing to help or assist them should Carlisle agree and Rosalie and Esme- and Emmett- had been given the slip. I felt numb... and cold.

And betrayed. I felt like an idiot. I knew Edward wanted to do this, even against my wishes and behind my back, hence my reasons for contacting Rosalie, but Jacob...

I never thought he'd go that far.

I knew that Jacob wanted me to abort Renesmee. But I didn't know that he would have agreed to go through with the same lengths that Edward did. In hindsight, I should've known; it was precisely the sort of thing both he and Edward would do.

And I forgave Edward. Or in the very least, I ignored it once he started hearing the baby's thoughts. But Jacob...

If Jacob could force a kiss on me, assault me, then he could have certainly held me down or knocked me unconscious, force anaesthesia on me and ripped my baby from my stomach before tearing her to pieces, given the opportunity. He hated my baby; he called her a monster. A killer. That was before he looked into her eyes, chocolate-brown so like mine, and imprinted.

A chill spread through me: what if I'd died or the baby emerged before Edward could read her thoughts and found out that she wasn't a monster? What if Renesmee had inherited my shield, instead of flipping it around, making her immune to Edward's power?

What would Edward or Jacob have done to her when I couldn't protect her? Rosalie had to be shoved out of the room during the birth because of her thirst, Esme and Carlisle had been away to hunt when my baby was born, Jasper couldn't be anywhere near human blood for understandable reasons, Emmett too perhaps, and Alice as well- if she could even bring herself stand up to Edward, nor wanted to, since she was so distressed and upset- or annoyed- about not being able to see me clearly... That left only the two of them to protect and look after my helpless newborn baby, the two men who'd most wanted her dead.

What would Edward or Jacob have done to her? If I hadn't survived, or if I had but Jacob didn't know that- or wanted anything more to do with me after I'd turned... If Renesmee had been a boy like I'd imagined... A boy with Edward's green eyes...

If Jacob had already tried to kill her before he imprinted...

I was distracted when I saw that, by my side, Renesmee had grown limp. To my relief, I saw that she had fallen asleep. I could hear her deep, calm and even breathing. I was grateful. she needed to know the truth, but the worst bits? My poor, innocent daughter had taken more than enough. She'd been betrayed by the men she'd loved and trusted the most, whom she still loved even when they annoyed, disrespected, disregarded and frustrated her to no end. But this... No amount of excuses could cover this up. Brushing my daughter's bronze curls away from her small and peacefully sleeping face, I looked at Rosalie.

"I'll take her." Emmett offered, to my surprise. He scooped her up gently and carried her upstairs. Rosalie followed.

Gabrielle looked back to the Quileutes. "I fear that we have strayed from the original topic at hand. I may have an idea how to sever, or rather, reverse the imprint bond between Jacob and Renesmee." Everyone's heads shot up. We were all shocked.

"And to ensure that Jacob would be able to feel the Pull again, once he comes back to his senses and recovers from-" Gabrielle waved her hand around the room "-all this. Only this time, we have to ensure that it won't be extreme; that neither he nor anyone else would imprint on someone younger and is unlikely to be receptive and reciprocate his advances. And hopefully, this will also temper his advances and remind him not to be so physically, psychologically and emotionally forceful because consent- freely given with no strings attached- is a must for any true love."

The Wolves slowly nodded. I could see Quil's face had turned to ash. There were shadows and lines of anguish etched across his face- but also agreement. I swallowed, feeling pity for him. I wondered if Gabrielle could do the same thing for him. I hoped that she would. But then, slowly, colour returned to his face, which began to look slightly more normal and healthy for him. I knew what he was thinking. I could only hope that it would end happily for him and Claire, even if they both went their separate ways.

"But I would also need the Wolves of Vermont and the Appalachians to help. If this is what your sense of Pull, or imprinting does to you... it's not right. Something needs to be done. It has to be regulated, the effects of the mind and its emotions has to be tempered and evened out, and every Wolf has to be able to feel it, but not to the extent that it completely overturns everything, even one's own sense of reason and sanity." She shook her head. "I know that Jacob's state of mind was deteriorating, as you have said, but the Pull- imprinting- is not a cure."

The Wolves all flinched, most likely feeling guilty since they should have known that something was wrong. And they did; they just assumed Jacob was now okay- more than okay, in fact.

But he wasn't. I thought, taking a deep breath. Despite my own anger at him, despite my deep-seated loathing for myself and what I did, I could forgive him... At least, I hoped I could.

After all if he needed help to begin with... and I didn't help. Hopefully, he would be able to get it. I didn't know if wizards had psychologists or psychiatrists, but they did, if it could help Jacob, undo all the damage that I did, that I inadvertently created, then I would be eternally grateful. I could forgive him.

"Certainly not to the extent where they pursue anyone with the level of aggression that Jacob showed, especially if it's not mutual or too young." Gabrielle as still saying.

"Why do we imprint on the ones that are too young, though?" Quil whispered. His voice was dry and hoarse. His face grey.

Gabrielle's brow furrowed as she looked at him. "Because Renesmee wasn't just a substitute or a replacement for Bella; she was a blank slate. A cup to be filled."

Everyone looked at her in shock.

"It was easy. She was young, newly born. She was Bella's daughter. Yes, she grew quickly and maybe the gene sensed that and thought that Jacob was desperate to have a mate as soon as possible, and thought it might as well. Or maybe it didn't know that. Either way, that and Jacob's intent to murder her, an innocent newborn..."

"He instinctively reacted to prevent that happening." Embry whispered, his eyes wide and blank with horror.

Gabrielle nodded, solemn. "Yes. You all have said so yourselves. This is not something he would typically do, not in his right state of mind. But since it had deteriorated, had steadily gotten worse and he had no help..."

"Oh God." Leah covered her face with her hands. "How could we not have seen this? How could we not have pointed out to Jacob that Bella was pregnant and therefore hormonal?" She sounded sick. "And Renesmee... this is GROOMING!"

Quil looked even more pale. Gabrielle agreed. "Like I said, I believed you all focused more on the supernatural aspect of her pregnancy as opposed to the non-supernatural part." She sighed. "But there's little we can do now. Until the other packs come and present their case to the Council of Elders and the pack Alphas..." She looked grim.

"I do have an idea of how to sever or reverse the imprint bond between Jacob and Renesmee, or any other Wolf and his mate who are unwilling or unable to make things work." Gabrielle said slowly.

All eyes shot towards her.

Gabrielle nodded. "It's called a soul-link. It is, for lack of a better term, spirit or psychic surgery." We all stared, bewildered. She explained further. "It involves me doing something which is known as Astral-Projection: the temporary separation of my consciousness, or even my soul, from my body and treating his soul and hers, as well as their minds. I would have to keep them both under stasis, gently reverse the imprint connection between both of them until both are at their original states, check for any spiritual and mental wounds, use my energy to heal them and ensure that they both would suffer no ill effects in their minds, souls or bodies, and make sure that he would be able to imprint again. Only this time- and this is what complicates things the most- I will have to calm and regulate his involuntary instincts, right down to the very genes that made him the way he is- same as all of you. A little genetic-tweaking as you can say. I don't know if any of you imprinted but it's a worrying sign if you feel the Pull towards someone who has a small chance of not reciprocating or being able to be what either of you will need in your lives, someone who is too young to consent without being psychologically groomed to be-" I felt ill "-or to feel such an overwhelming sense of Pull that, despite all the above, you are completely and totally under the firm conviction that you are soulmates, even when it isn't reciprocated." She looked grim. "Because with Jacob and Renesmee, I am certain this was not the case."

I could barely breathe. "Can you do that though?"

"It's possible." Gabrielle bit her lip. She looked uncertain. "But it will be very difficult. In the meantime... well, we have to get back to the Carpathians." She gave me a look. "Radu has told me that the trial date is being set."

"Can you do it for me?" Quil's voice suddenly interrupted.

Gabrielle cocked her head. "Pardon?"

Quil swallowed. "I imprinted. On Emily's niece."

As Gabrielle stared, Quil continued. "Claire- she was two. She's three now."

As Gabrielle absorbed this in shock, Quil pressed on. "I don't know whether Jacob will listen- or whether he will even want to listen- but... Jake's not the same." He blurted, looking almost in tears. "Ever since... ever since he got to know Bella after Edward left-" his eyes hesitantly flitted to me "-he hasn't been the same Jake that we all know. He's... desperate. Increasingly desperate."

"It started getting worse after he phased," Embry cut in. "He grew even more desperate. He didn't want to lose you, Bella." He looked at me. "It only went to the level it got to after Edward came back and went to crazy after you got married. After he imprinted, we thought everything would die down, everything would get better but Jake and Nessie..." he looked anguished. "It's not working for them. We have to admit it now. Nessie doesn't want to be with Jacob, and she doesn't have to be. She shouldn't. She doesn't have to feel forced into anything. She has her whole life to live."

Quil swallowed. Both he and Seth nodded. "That's why I'm asking you to do it with me and Claire." He said, turning back to Gabrielle. "She doesn't deserve this. And I can't be like this."

Gabrielle bowed her head. Pity and sorrow were in etched in her breathtakingly beautiful features. "Very well. But I can't force any kind of surgery- physical or spiritual and mental- on anyone. And this includes Jacob and Renesmee... or Sam and Emily." She looked first at me, and then at Leah.

"Do you believe their connection should be cut off and reversed?"

Leah startled, didn't speak. Not for a long moment.

Then, fervently, to our surprise, she shook her head. "No."

Seth's jaw dropped. Quil's eyes widened and Embry's practically ballooned. We all stared in shock.

"I- I can't." Leah said, shaking her head. "I just can't do it. Maybe... tempered down the way you said it was to other Wolves, but... not cut off. Not reversed. Not completely."

Gabrielle looked at her, observing her in silence for a long moment. Finally, she spoke:

"Did the two of you break up before he imprinted? Or did he imprint on her while he was still having a relationship with you?"

Leah bit her lip and nodded. "Yeah. He was still with me when... when he imprinted. Emily came by for a visit, like she always did.

"But Sam and Emily only have each other left," Leah said, shocking all of us when she spoke. I stood there, stunned as she contradicted everything I and everyone else thought we knew about Leah. "When he got together... everybody didn't like what they did to me. What they thought the two of them did to me. Not even Sam's mother. Allison had already had that with Joshua, Sam's dad. She didn't want to see her son become like that. So she cut him off and kicked him out. They haven't spoken since." Leah explained.

I felt my breath hitch. "She never knew?"

"No one ever got the chance to tell her," Leah confessed. "Or well, Sam put it off. He was busy with Alpha duties and with Emily too. Allison just ignored Emily whenever she came to her house and tried to win her over. And when Emily finally couldn't take it any longer and broke down and Sam found out the reason why, he grew angry." Leah took a shuddering breath. "He stormed his way and barged into their house. They had words. Allison... she parted ways with him but not before he made an ultimatum: either she accepted Emily and their relationship together or he would walk out. Allison chose the latter. She said she had only wanted to see if there was anything left of the son she knew inside his outer shell, but it was Sam who made the ultimatum. She said she had to put up with one Joshua Uley in her life, and she didn't need another. She couldn't that bear to see what he had become and that she wasn't a glutton for punishment: she wasn't going to keep chasing him, hoping but knowing that he would never look back or think twice what he was doing to anybody else anymore, as compared to Emily. Especially since she would have to put up with Emily who was my cousin and like my sister. She couldn't bear to see her son destroy a family from within and end up with someone who didn't seem to think about publicly tossing family loyalties out the window for a new love- just like what he became."

I couldn't suppress a shudder. It sounded... too close to what I'd had with Charlie, back in March last year.

And Charlie had let Edward under his roof. He hadn't turned his back on me. He let me marry Edward, despite his own misgivings. And he was correct about them.

My gut twisted with guilt, shame and grief. If Charlie had agreed to my ultimatum, had refused to put up with my selfish idiocy any longer... would we be in this state? Would he have been less bitter?

Would he forgive me? Could Charlie ever forgive me?

He had never accepted Edward as his son, the way Carlisle and Esme had me. He only tolerated him for Nessie's sake and mine.

But Charlie hated him. He resented him. I wonder, did he resent me?

It was a hard thought to consider. But I wouldn't blame him if he did. After all, I deserved it. Deep down, I'd always known that I did. I just didn't acknowledge it because I thought that because Charlie didn't know about the supernatural and of the depth and meaningfulness of my connection to Edward...

I was the world's biggest fool.

"Sam chose his imprint over his mother?" Gabrielle asked quietly. "You have to tell me- or show me more about every single imprint bond- what it's like what you experienced during and just before you imprinted-" she looked at Quil when she said this. "Everything. Including their individual personalities and what drew them together. What their relationships are like now. I suspect that Renesmee is not the only one chafing." Quil's face looked drawn and pale, but resolute. He nodded.

I understood why Quil was doing this. So, my admiration, and my respect for him, grew tenfold. But Leah...

I stared at her. "Why?" I whispered hoarsely, before I could stop myself. I addressed Leah.

"Don't you want him back?" My eyes begged, no screamed for answers. Something that would make sense that wasn't so horrifying at the same time. Something that I had believed in before my world- no, all our worlds were completely overturned and shattered. Something that could make me believe that we could all walk away from this intact.

Leah sighed, rubbing a hand over her face. The others did the exact same thing.

"Apart from the fact that we are apparently related-" the last word was thrown towards her mother's direction. Sue had the good grace to wince "-even if that wasn't the case, I still wouldn't take him back."

"Why not?" It was Seth, her own brother, who asked her this. He and Embry stared at Leah with dark eyes. Quil was silent.

"Because I don't love him. Not anymore." Leah took a deep breath, then sighed, as if letting a burden off her shoulders. Everyone was silent.

I could see in her face that it was true. Everyone was surprised. Even Leah seemed to surprise herself when she said it out loud.

"Even if I still did... I won't take him back. I can't take him- either of them back. Well, maybe Emily, but..." she trailed off hesitantly. "She's family at the end of the day, she was my sister, but now... after all this... I can't forget everything that's happened. I know he didn't mean to do it, anymore than she did- it was involuntary for him, and she had tried to force him away at their costs. But I still wouldn't take him back. I wouldn't trust him. I couldn't." She reiterated. "I can't trust myself to feel happy or comfortable, or even just to feel safe around either of them; Sam or Emily."

Leah took a deep breath. "I lost more than just Sam when he imprinted. I lost Emily too." She said slowly. "I thought of her as my sister... and then this happened. When I found out the truth, it still didn't help the anger, the hurt. But I had no more reason to hate them- or so I thought, or rather hoped I did." She made a face. "Or tried to do, in any case. So... I just lashed out.

"I missed what I had with both of them," Leah said, slowly "maybe I still do. But I don't want things to go back to what they were before. You can never get back what's lost. And I'm not the same girl that I was back then, back when I still had Sam as my boyfriend and Emily as my sister. Because she was my sister- not just my cousin. Not to me. And maybe a small part of me still feels that way. But I don't think I can get over this, and I don't think they can either."

Suddenly, for some reason, I felt a strange surge of admiration and pride for Leah. Not sympathy. At first I didn't understand it, but now I knew why: she was telling us- telling herself even- that she was more than what the two of them did to her; more than what everyone made her out to be.

I knew she didn't hate Emily. Even after I'd heard her story, I knew she didn't hate either of them; but she was still hurting.

Yet she'd grown above that- above all of them. And maybe, just maybe...

"I didn't feel safe- didn't feel comfortable being with them. And with my wounds being rubbed with salt by seeing what was on his mind- and what was on all of yours- I had no privacy. I knew I reacted badly." She looked towards Embry. "I resented the pack- no, I hated them. I knew they weren't comfortable with me, and at best they pitied me, so I resented that too. I'd lost my father and I was grieving. I'd blamed myself. I'd thought that there was something wrong with me because I was the only girl who phased and my long-time boyfriend imprinted on my cousin, rather than me. and I was left on my own in a pack of guys that didn't want me; with the imprints not comfortable being around me. Emily and Sam still feeling guilty but unable to do anything about it; to suppress themselves and their happiness. And I couldn't even blame them. I thought I didn't even have a right to be angry, a good reason to be so furious with anyone. That's what seemed to make it so unfair. And when Jacob had his heart broken... well, how come I was the shrew but everyone wanted to hold his hand? Even after what he did and wanted?"

Everyone was silent. I could see the varying levels of guilt and shame on each of the three boys, most of all her own brother. They shifted uncomfortably.

"I felt humiliated, not just heartbroken by Sam and Emily. So I took it out on everyone. I lashed out: on you, Embry. All those things that I thought, all those things none of you wanted me to think about- to force them to remember or think about... I wanted to provoke everyone- make them see what it felt like to have their private business aired so publicly, their heartbreak made plain for all to see." Her shoulders slumped. "I am sorry. I truly am."

For a while, Embry couldn't speak. Then he finally managed. "Leah... it's alright. We were all wrong." Seth nodded, swallowing. I could see that he blamed himself for not seeing this.

"Yeah." Leah agreed, shaking her head. "We were all screwed up. But I don't want to be with Sam. Not anymore. I don't think I can look at either of them the same way now." She admitted. "I just never could admit, even to myself, that this wasn't just about him: it was about her too. Because then... it would've been too much. Too much for me to handle, even just acknowledging it."

I agreed. My respect for Leah quadrupled. Same as for Quil. And for Seth and Embry.

"I loved him- yeah. I loved what we used to have. But he is gone to me. I loved her too. Maybe..." she trailed off, then shook her head. "Maybe a part of me still does. I missed what we both used to be together, what we used to have. But it's gone now. Both of them. And it's not coming back." She looked at me. "When some lines are crossed... you have to set boundaries to see what kind of people you're dealing with first. Whether they truly care for you or not. Sam and Emily did care, just not enough." Leah shook her head. "Even though this is involuntary and so messed up in so many ways, I can't ever forget that. I can't trust either of them the same way again, to open my heart to either of them, even if they couldn't help what had happened. I don't feel happy. I don't feel safe. I don't feel comfortable and I never will, ever again. Not around them. I'm sorry but it's true."

Leah took a deep breath and looked at Gabrielle. "When the Volturi came on New Year's Eve, and more vampires came to the Cullens to support them as witnesses, we had more people on our side phasing. Why didn't any of the girls?"

Gabrielle was silent for a long moment. Her eyes were far away. When she finally spoke, it shocked us to the core.

"Because you are the Luna." She said slowly. "The first and the Alpha Female of the Quileute Wolves."

I could feel my jaw drop. Stunned silence permeated every corner of the room.

"The- the Luna?" Seth whispered. "Isn't that like- well, what you said is the Alpha's mate?"

"Not necessarily," Gabrielle explained. "In some species and packs, this is truly the case. Sometimes, the Luna is nothing more than the Alpha's mate, who births his offspring, looks after the pack, et cetera. But not always. Sometimes the Luna is the Alpha's mate and therefore, as the one closest to him, assists him in making decisions and stands in for him. She is closer to him than even his Beta, his second-in-command. Other times, the Luna is an Alpha, who just happened to be female. Sometimes, the pack only has one Luna, instead of an Alpha; a female whom they acknowledge as their highest authority. The most senior member. The one who, instead of being like a queen consort, is a queen regnant- a ruling queen. A leader and a chieftess."

She paused. Her violet-blue eyes were unreadable as she gazed at Leah. "You mentioned that you were all descended from one common ancestor, Taha Aki. He became the first to phase. At some point, this was going to happen, and those girls- those future female Wolves- would look to the most senior female to guide them- to lead them." Everybody inhaled sharply, but Gabrielle continued, without distraction. "And what does Sam know? What does Jacob know? You yourself mentioned you were pretty much an outcast, unwanted and pitied upon by the members of the packs." Seth, Embry and even Quil cringed. "And I suspect that this may also be due to the fact that none of them are comfortable because they are not merely used to the presence of a female, much less someone with a personal and sad history with their commanding leader, their Alpha. Let's be honest here, even if you didn't know about the relation between you and Sam- would you have wanted him to imprint on you? Or you to him? Do you truly want to imprint on someone else, after seeing what happened, what it cost you?"

No one responded. Leah just stood there in shock as Gabrielle continued. "What do any of those boys in the pack know what it is truly like to be an outsider? To be different? To feel like you have no one?" She challenged. "Perhaps Taha Aki chose you for a reason: because you're stronger. Unlike all the others, you've had to go through all this: the loss of your first love, the loss of someone who was your sister, the loss of your father, the change of your own body, the loss of not just your privacy but your dignity-" Leah's eyes widened as she inhaled sharply. "The loss of your status within the society, being an outsider, the lone-wolf, despite the fact that you were in a pack...

"The other Wolves don't have that. They don't know that. Not even the other packs who've had not just females, but female Alphas. You of all people, know what it's like to be an outsider. To be an outcast. To be shunned and unwanted. Mocked and pitied." Leah's eyes flickered as Gabrielle met her square in the eyes. "Who better to your guiding ancestor to protect them? To look out for them? To be there for them, as a queen, as a mother? As a Luna? To lead them?

"Maybe that's what your ancestor is thinking. Maybe he's testing and watching you. He's waiting for you to be ready so that when his other daughters come to join the hunt, you will be there to guide them. To lead them as they run out for the chase."

At this proclamation, all had fallen silent. Even Sue who had by now finished speaking to the Vermont and Appalachian pack-members. She stood, open-mouthed as Gabrielle spoke.

"It's do or die, Leah." Gabrielle's expression had taken on a grim and determined stance. "As a werewolf, a Loup-Garou, you either run, you swim, you leap and you hunt. Or you lose your way in the dark and never get found. Not by anybody. Fairytales do not exist; there is no knight in shining armour. There is no Prince Charming who will save you and sweep you off your feet. You are a Loup-Garou, a hereditary werewolf. And you were chosen by Taha Aki to lead his Wolf daughters. To guide them.

"There is no room for hesitation, doubt or fear. And you being strong enough to not go back and fruitlessly long for what you once had, to long for a place with someone enough to sacrifice looking forwards... you've just proven to everyone, yourself included-" Gabrielle nodded. "-that you are not broken, Leah. In fact, you are a leading Alpha. A Luna."

---

I was planning to end the conversation, but alas it took a LOT longer than I expected to get things sorted and for everyone to discover why their world and characters are in such a mess. But how did you like those revelations about Leah? And Sam and Emily? I strongly suspected that Leah was also bitter and hurt, not so much about losing Sam her love, but losing Emily, her sister- someone she thought of as such. She just couldn't bring herself to say or even think about it. After all, didn't Leah know Emily longer than she knew Sam? Hadn't she been just as close to, if not closer to her than her boyfriend?

The part where Leah admits that Sam's mother Allison Uley cut ties with him and threw him out of her house is inspired by: A Bitter Woman by ChaoticNeutral in AO3 (check it out, it's amazing). Completely underrated but incredible. Honestly though, it could have- and should have been- Charlie speaking to Bella and standing up while he was confronting her at the end of New Moon. Especially the last part where she said she wasn't a glutton for punishment and would, therefore, not keep running after her son to pray every single day that today would be the day he finally looked away from his love for five seconds and remembered that there were other people who still loved him. Or the part about him and her living in their self-contained bubble of bliss, not caring about what other people feel.

And the author was right: I can't see Allison, knowing what happened between her and Joshua, being alright with Sam dumping Leah for her cousin- someone like her sister- while flaunting his newfound love to Emily in public, no less, any more than I can see Sue Clearwater being alright with Jacob deliberately phasing in front of Charlie, when Harry, her late husband, had died when Leah unexpectedly and accidentally phased in front of her father giving him a heart attack and leaving the family bereft. Harry's cholesterol levels were referenced during the dinner at the Blacks' house in New Moon, but Charlie had been anxious, worried, tired and stressed over Bella's early marriage and 'tropical disease', who didn't know anything about the supernatural, much less that people who were his family, or considered them, were a part of such things. There's a lot of double standards in the series, not least of which why fans are so upset with Bella, Edward and Jacob: Bella considers other girls- humans- silly and shallow about certain things, but when Alice does anything similar, she instantly forgives or neglects to hold it against her. Everybody in the books wishes to hold Jacob's hand when his heart is broken; but they act like Leah's a criminal for feeling the same way. And for a telepath, Edward is the most judgmental, un-emphatic person ever.