LXXIV

Disiecta Membra

Inuyasha is a fool, and he knows it, but he doesn't think she will be so foolish as to jump after him. Something of betrayal still lies between them; something deeper binds them together despite that. She is all he has ever known of love, in a world where his own mother showed more of fear and her own shame than affection. He is everything that ties her to the world outside the shrine, and as much as he knows that he could have been anyone, so long as he was willing to reach out to her, he is selfishly glad that it is him, and not anyone. Him, so much so that now it's too late for another. Why else would she have followed him, be here with him, kneeling amidst the bones and dust and blood with him?

"Kikyou, I love you."

He feels her hand on his shoulder, gentle as always, but it's only to steady him as she turns his face to examine his injury, then rips off a portion of an already torn sleeve. "What a fool you are, Inuyasha. Is now the time?"

"Nah. Course not. But I still had to say it."

She sighs, but she's smiling, and he counts it as well done even as she shakes her head. "I don't know what you're thinking. You shouldn't have followed him, not tonight."

"You shouldn't have followed me. I'll heal in the morning, but you…" He winces as she wipes blood from his cheek and binds a pad of folded silk over his empty eye socket. Everything about this moment reminds him that he's no use to her, can't protect her, can't wield his blood and body in her defense as is his usual practice. She has her power, but human I'm good for nothing. As she stands, the red flash of her hakama distracts him. He, too, is dressed in red.

Without giving the matter further thought, he stands and disrobes, bunches the Robe of the Fire Rat in his fists, then reaches out and drapes it over Kikyou's back.

"Inuyasha?"

"It's better than armor, and I can't protect you. You know I'm as good as useless right now, except maybe as a distraction. You've actually got a chance at stopping him – or at least hurting him."

Black wells void of all feeling stare back at him from her eyes. "If he is evil, I will purify him and his remnants out of this world."

"But before –"

"I couldn't hit him without hitting you."

"You might have to take that chance. If he knows you care about me, he'll use that against you. Against both of us."

Curious, in a way that she has been since her resurrection, she stares at him for a long moment. "Inuyasha, do you really think your brother is more terrible than death? Than the hell of dying and still believing that betrayal? Do you think that now, between worlds as I am, someone like him matters to me? For hurting you, I will kill him – but not for any price will I hurt you."

He has nothing to say to that, can find no words equal to her admission that he hasn't already said. For a long while, glaring around at the horizon, he is silent, but the pressure of the situation forces him to say something. "Did you see which way he went?"

"I did not. I do see where he probably has gone." She points at the horizon, but as soon as Inuyasha lifts his head he knows what she means. The bones of an armored beast overshadow everything else, and he knows the marks on that armor, knows why some part of the smell in this place, the feel of it, is familiar. Slowly, he stands and takes in the barren wasteland around them. There's no sign of Sesshomaru, and bones litter the greenless ground. It's not even a desert, just a lack of anything living.

"So this is where the old man's buried, huh?" Snorting, then wincing at the lance of pain that sends through his sinuses, the hanyō struggles up the side of the hill they've landed on, looking for the shortest path down into the valley where his father's bones stand staring at him. "Figures that this would have something to do with him. Never gonna escape his legacy, am I?"

"Is that what you want?" Kikyou's voice is mild, but he senses more than curiosity in the question.

What I want? What do I want? I thought I should be a demon, so I that could be one thing or the other. Because I didn't want to be human, not really. Because I wanted power. To be strong enough to protect myself and the ones… the one I choose. Even if I don't know what she is anymore, or what we are anymore. Even if I won't be able to admit it in the morning.

"Inuyasha?"

"I don't know. I don't know what I want. I thought I wanted the shikon no tama, but it's not like I'm gonna get it, is it? That wolf has got plans, and I'm not part of 'em. I wanted you, too. I still do. But I don't know what we've got now. I don't know what you…" He stops, shrugs. "But you already said it's not the time, is it?"

"No. It will be, someday."

He starts to shake his head, and then thinks better of it. "Right. But first we've gotta find Sesshomaru, and then we've gotta live through doing it."

"We could leave –"

"No." The word comes out colder than he means it to, but that's one thing he won't consider. "Not until I know what he came here for, what he took out of my eye."

She sighs, then points down the hillside. "There. Within. I can feel an enormous amount of yōki stirring within the grave, but the source is indistinct. Something about this place is…familiar?" But she sounds very uncertain, as if familiar isn't just the wrong word, but very wrong.

"There has to be a way inside, then. Do you see something I'm missing?" He scans the front of the tomb as they come down the hill. Other bones lay scattered below the great skeleton, some of them worn, some of them gleaming as if only recently picked clean of flesh. Below the sternum, between the curve of enormous ribs, he finally sees a black space – not a door, but maybe an entrance, though to what… "Is this a cemetery, or just a tomb for my father?" But Kikyou has no answer, and Inuyasha falls silent as they approach. A single step under the shadow of those bones, and the eerie light beating down on them from a sunless sky vanishes, as if it has been sliced away.

A phosphorescent gleam grows around them as they walk forward, just enough to illuminate the shadow of the huge ribs curving in above them and a floor covered in skulls, human and yōkai. Enemies of his father? Servants who'd been sacrificed? Who knows. Who cares? Against the far wall, at the base of his father's spine, is one thing that might explain Sesshomaru's desires. A platform, shining with the yellow glow of raw gold. It holds a rusted sword, the hilt bound in tattered wrappings, leaning as if discarded in front of gilded swirls of samadhi fire. An altar, perhaps, but does that make the sword the offering or the sacred talisman?

Beside the platform, fury etched into every angle of his face, Sesshomaru stands, staring at the blade through fire that's burning his fingers. Inuyasha is aware of Kikyou moving beside him, hears the subtle thrum of her bowstring as she nocks an arrow, then stands quietly, waiting for one of them to make the first move.

"Sesshomaru - !" But Inuyasha stops, because he doesn't know why he's here, or what his brother is after, or why, other than wounded pride, he's followed him. For a rusting sword? Because adrenaline demanded he do something, anything other than give in to his weakness, his vulnerability? It's pulsing in him now, just standing here, faced with his brother's unconcern. The wound of being found tonight, a no-moon night, a human night, is far greater than his missing eye.

Inuyasha has always been aware, with a kind of half-formed, subconscious knowledge, that there's no way he made it through his childhood without Sesshomaru knowing his secret. There have been too many encounters, too much violence. Even as a child, before he understood what it was that stood between them, he knew that Sesshomaru represented the greatest threat to his life. It's the same now, but the knowing is harder. The admission is harder. That edge has come to a fine point, but why here?

The sword stands out in his mind's eye as it does before him, surrounded by the gleam of gold as if that's the way it should be. A pulse twitches against his eardrum, not quite heard, but not quite silent. His palms itch; the air feels tight, heavy, wrong. Something is missing – in him, in the sword, in the moment. Something is not the way it should be.

"You shouldn't have come here, Inuyasha." Layers of warning and loathing intermingle in Sesshomaru's voice. Green radiance washes out the fire clinging to his hand, but Inuyasha has heard enough of what Sesshomaru thinks is important. Instead his attention is on the sword, the feeling it gives him and the way his brother is glaring at it, as if personally insulted. Insulted…by a sword? It makes no sense, but neither does the fact that his brother is just standing there, clenching and unclenching his fingers, glaring at something he obviously longs to possess. Why not take it? Why hasn't he taken it already, when it took them so much longer to arrive?

Unless he can't. The thought struck like lightning, illuminating the situation. The pearl had been in his eye, not Sesshomaru's. The sword, then, something that could only be found this way… It's not for him. The pulse clarified, crystallized. It's not for you, Sesshomaru. "I can't believe it. You pull all this shit, rip out my goddamn eye, and it's for nothing?"

The words whip his brother's attention around to him, deadly things in his stare that are no more or less than what Inuyasha expects. "You can't take it, can you? It's not for you, is it? What are you so pissed off about, you've already got a sword and this one looks like it's one swing away from falling to pieces."

"Tessaiga was not meant for the likes of you!"

The single sentence holds more emotion than Inuyasha has ever heard in his brother's voice before, but for once it doesn't sting him. He can hear everything he's ever wanted in those words, and as much as it burns him, knowing it only now, after so long, the relief is greater. The pleasure is greater, because not only does it soothe him, but torment his brother.

"Sure it was. That's why it was hidden in me, right? So I'd always have it, and you never would. Guess the old man misjudged you, you are horrible enough to rip out your own brother's eye. Next to that stealing my inheritance isn't much, is it? Tessaiga, that's the name of this sword?" Brazen, defiant, heart pounding in his chest and knowing that his brother can hear it, Inuyasha strides forward and puts a hand on the hilt. "But you couldn't take it, could you, because it's not yours! It's meant for me, so I can take care of myself and the ones I want to protect!"

The words are good, great even, but Inuyasha isn't certain he believes them himself. Not until he lowers his gaze from Sesshomaru's face to Kikyou's, sees a certain kind of pride there, a certain kind of belief. She trusts me. After everything – and I will keep her safe.

There's a tink, almost too faint for human ears to hear, and the sword comes free of its stand. The strange pulse beats anew in the background of Inuyasha's thoughts, like something sleepy waiting to be awakened, but the sword doesn't sharpen, doesn't change in any way. It looks as it did when he first caught sight of it – dented, rusted, the wrapping of the hilt coming undone. As if a beloved blade has been left in the rain for a hundred years. But its powers or lack thereof aren't as important as the fact that it's his. That his father left it for him, thought of him, defied his elder son to make sure there was something of him left behind for Inuyasha.

A growl jerks him out of his introspection, and he snaps his attention back to his brother's face. Something wild, deeper than anger, a kind of unattainable rage, has sharpened the features of Sesshomaru's face. The feeling draws more deadly points to his fangs. His eyes are red as blood, the pupils shrinking, wide gold irises darkening to navy points of fury. The moment draws itself out under Inuyasha's gaze– a shattering at the edges of his brother's body, not a transformation but an encapsulation.

"Watch out!" Sesshomaru's energy blossoms and devours him as Inuyasha shouts, makes lines of white death in the air and shakes the ground. Inuyasha stumbles as the floor shifts, skulls and bones moving under his feet, granting no purchase. Behind him, Kikyou stands still as the rock, utterly unmoved. If Sesshomaru's power is a tide crashing against them, a great wave in a greater ocean, she is earth itself, the all-embracing mother with her back turned in refusal. A pink shine makes the air gleam around her, suddenly pearlescent, and Inuyasha senses more power gathering behind that barrier, though he can't see it.

Dust explodes around them as Sesshomaru's energy condenses into matter, and the Inu stands before them, true form fully exposed. Wrath flickers in his eyes; poison drips from his jaws. Each great paw bears a blunt and terrible claw bigger than Inuyasha's body, but he stands where he is, between his brother and his woman, driving all his anxiety into the hands clutched around Tessaiga's hilt.

If Inuyasha stands, he will fall. Kikyou sees that as clearly as the bitter blindness in his brother's eyes. That blindness will drive Sesshomaru to break filial bonds, sink deeper into depravity and kill his own brother. This sword means something to him that neither of them understands. To take it from him has driven him almost mad, even if the reason is beyond her. Why else would Sesshomaru, elegant in presentation and affectation, have taken on this primal form, exposing his bestial nature in all its terrible glory?

Intentionally or not, he has made himself less vulnerable with his change of shape. It will take more than one shot to purify such a beast, just because of his size. If she draws his attention, will she survive long enough for a second attack? Perhaps. The Robe of the Fire Rat will help, proof against fang and flame, but maybe not Sesshomaru's poison. The air is tainted already; the pale shimmering of her barrier has become a white shield, sparking from floor to just above her knees. It's taxing to keep the bubble of protection active, but she is not the only vulnerable one this time.

The vicious miasma rises further as the toxin continues to flow past Sesshomaru's fangs, clouding the air with a green haze, but when he leaps, she's ready for him. Kikyou's arrow flies with all the power she can muster behind it and catches him in the shoulder as he becomes airborne, one paw reaching forward. A massive chunk of flesh evaporates, leaving a gory hole behind, and she sees a flicker of surprise in the midst of Sesshomaru's fury, a sudden amber glint in the wrath-reddened eyes.

It lasts only for a moment, but that's long enough for her to nock another arrow, get off another shot. She's aiming for the hollow of his throat this time, seeking a blow that will set him back if not kill. But he rears back and instead the violet flare of her arrow burns its way deep into his breast. It's enough to make him howl, but his movement is uninterrupted. Sesshomaru's head comes down, jaws open wide, the great fangs glinting green with poison. He ignores Kikyou like she's not worth a glance, all his attention on his brother.

Inuyasha lunges to the side, a black and white streak with Tessaiga outstretched before him – and then he's dressed in red again, the stain spreading crimson from what's left of his left arm. Sesshomaru retreats, quick as he attacked, with only a spray of blood on his muzzle to speak to what he's done. Inuyasha stumbles, eyes slowly widening, as if he cannot at first understand what it is that's happened. Blindly, he clutches at the gush of blood where his arm should be with a fist still wrapped around Tessaiga's hilt, then falls to his knees.

"Inuyasha –" With his weight behind it, the sword digs into the ground and halts his fall. He leans there, precariously balanced, his remaining hand still clutched around the hilt as his head falls forward. "Inuyasha!"

The blood flows and flows.

He doesn't answer.

Kikyou's body is not flesh – she knows this, has suffered the awareness of that truth since she remembered her name. In this moment, it doesn't matter. She can feel the pounding in her chest of a heartbeat she doesn't have, can feel tears on her face that shouldn't be falling. Is it because she knows what she should feel, or because she feels so much? The whirlwind is born within her, power flowing as it never has before. All her grief, all her rage, all of the terror that this second life, this unnatural life, has granted her, pours out of her and into the gathering storm.

And the hope. The dream, the promise that begs her attention. It might be made to end differently this time. It might be that there is a reason for her existence - and is it not enough that she's once again able to walk at his side? Is it not enough that the truth unravels the pain between them, makes it nothing to all that binds their lives? He is not perfect, but neither is she. It might be selfish to want more than what she's had, but what does it make it, then that she demands it?

I will not lose him this way, when I-

Selfish as it is, the wish is pure and undivided. The power of the shard that sustains her beats and boils, adding onto the energy that lashes around her, preparing for a hammer blow. The bones of the great Inu around them vibrate and crackle as Sesshomaru steps forward, intending to finish his brother for good. Power lashes out at him, but not from her – Before Kikyou has a chance to move, the sword reacts in Inuyasha's hand. Tessaiga roars in silence, defending its master, the rusted blade letting loose the shattering strength of a daiyōkai.

The attack is strong enough to wash away the glow that Kikyou has accumulated around herself, to purge her purity and Sesshomaru's poison both. She sees blood flowing from a quartet of enormous wounds before the Inu is slammed through his father's ribs, breaks them open and falls bleeding among the sacrifices that lie around the tomb. In the sudden silence, the crackle of lightning waiting around Tessaiga's blade is deafening, but Kikyou doesn't hesitate. She rushes forward, taking Inuyasha into her arms, and the sword falls quietly to the floor.

A/N: And you thought I'd just slice off Sesshomaru's other arm. HAHAHAHA no. No, that would be tooooooo easy. While a human Inuyasha might be able to pull Tessaiga (especially with his heart in the right place for once), he can't use the sword until he's fully hanyō again. Now he's gonna have to learn to use it one handed. The chapter's title, Disiecta Membra, means Scattered Limbs. Technically it's only one, but hey! Who's counting? Next Time: Back to the Pack! One door leads to Hiten and Manten; the other door leads to a horrible death… no, Wait! One door leads to NARAKU and the other door leads to a horrible… Well, crap! Stop opening doors, Kagome!

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