Winter's Refuge
Chapter One Hundred Forty-Nine
JED 'KID' CURRY
I understand why the bandages on my ankles are tight. The rope shackles yesterday were worse than the metal and cut into them. And when I jerked Mrs. Birde's table, the ankle tied to the leg got a very deep burnin' cut. But I'm tryin' to walk with them on and not show the pain. My hands are in the handcuffs, and I didn't fight when Sheriff Birde put them on. I will probably wear them until I arrive at the prison after the trial. Not even sure if I'm goin' to the Nebraska Prison in Lincoln or the Wyomin' State Prison. Wyomin' takes prisoners when Lincoln gets full. From what I've heard, the one in Lincoln is even more violent than Wyomin'.
Don't know what I expected, but my trial is in the Birde's dinin' room and it doesn't look like any courtroom I've ever been in. The table is gone. There are two chairs behind a low table back by the windows. Thinkin' that might be where the judge sits because there's a gavel on the table. There's a single chair a few feet away. And in a half circle next to it more chairs. Across from that, two rows of four chairs facin' the judge's table.
"Sit in two of the front row chairs there." Sheriff Birde pointed me and Heyes to the two rows of chairs.
HEYES
I made sure to walk right next to the Kid and match my stride to his slow measured pace. I know those ankles are paining him, but he refuses to acknowledge the pain. Sheriff told us to take seats in the front of two rows. Me and the Kid took the two middle seats, sat down, and waited.
"Ain't never saw a courtroom that looks like this," I whispered in the silence.
There was concern but not fear in the blue eyes he turned to me. I took that as an improvement and tried to not let him see the fear I felt.
"Remember to plead 'not guilty' no matter what. Okay?" I said.
I think he was going to say 'yes sir' but stopped himself and gave me a slight smile. "I promise, Heyes, but don't see how that will help."
"You never know how trials go and…" I was cut off by people entering the room. Sheriff Birde led them in. He and Dr. Arden sat in the row behind us.
Four men came in next. Mike Loveland pushing Jeff Birde, followed by Colin Apperson and Lom Trevors. None of them would look right at us, even though they sat pretty much across from us. What were they doing at this trial? My heart beat faster, but next to me the Kid showed no emotion. A thought flashed through my mind that alarmed me. Were they going to convict the Kid and send him to a mental hospital? I've heard about the painful tortures and isolation those so-called patients are put through. I'm not letting the Kid go to one of those, even if I have to break him out at gunpoint. I'm not wearing a gun. Nobody, not even the two sheriffs, Birde and Lom, are wearing guns.
It was quiet in the room until Mike Loveland stood and said, "Those that can, please stand."
His words made me sad for Jeff Birde, but he wouldn't let my eyes catch his. The rest of us stood. Two men entered from the kitchen and stood in back of the table in front of the two chairs there.
I knew one of the men well and so does the Kid. "Pappy," I whispered to him.
He nodded and he whispered back, "And US Marshal Deputy Director Aaron Brothers."
"Friend?" I asked.
"Thought so."
Pappy glared at the Kid, announcing, "Silence in the court. Court is now in session. Duly authorized Judge Alan P Allen and Duly authorized Judge Aaron Brothers presiding." They sat down in unison.
"Please sit," Mike said, and the rest of us sat down and looked at the judges.
Judge Alan P Allen, or Pappy, as he was known when me and the Kid rescued him from captivity in Devil's Hole, banged his gavel twice on the makeshift desk. He looked straight at the Kid. "Mr. Jedediah Curry, you are entitled to a jury of your peers, but through numerous discussions we have decided that there is no one like you. We have done the best we could. Do you have any objection to any of the four jury members seated here?"
The Kid looked confused, so I leaned in and said, "Say no objection."
I could see the thanks in his eyes. He struggled to his feet and said in a strong voice, "No objection, sir."
"Very good, they have already been sworn in. Mr. Heyes inquired about legal representation for you, but we don't think that is necessary. The judges will first ask you some questions about the charges against you. Do you understand?"
He wasn't asked to plead. I'm not sure what's going on. Still standing, the Kid answered, "Yes, sir."
Pappy said something to Judge Brothers then told the Kid to sit down. "Jedediah Curry, the first charge against you is aiding and abetting the wanted outlaw Josiah Jewell, also known as Preacher. I want to ask you some questions about this. First, Sheriff Birde is going to ask you to put your hand on the Bible and ask you to pledge to tell the truth."
The Kid tried to stand up when the sheriff brought the Bible to him. "Stay seated, son," the sheriff told him and then swore him in.
And my mind started thinking again. Sheriff Birde called him 'son'. I've heard him call him that before…before when they were friends, not jailer and prisoner.
"Mr. Curry, listen to what I ask and answer only the exact, direct question asked. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir," the Kid answered, but I heard questions in his voice.
"Did you go somewhere to meet Mr. Jewell?"
"No, sir. He…"
"Only answer the question asked," Judge Brothers told him brusquely.
"Yes, sir," the Kid said. This time everyone in the room could tell he was confused.
"So, Mr. Jewell came to you?" Pappy asked.
"Yes, sir."
I was glad the Kid answered only the direct question. I was there that night. He sent me inside when he saw who was at Phoenix's gate. I was on parole. Being with Preacher was a violation of that parole and I would go back to prison. He told me to go into the house and stay there. And that's what I did.
"Why did Mr. Jewell seek you out?" Pappy continued.
The Kid thought for a long moment. "He wanted to let me know that Mark McWinters was kidnappin' people and holdin' them hostage in Devil's Hole."
"Did he tell you why?" Pappy seemed to be choosing his words carefully, too.
Again, the Kid took his time answering. "They were family members of telegraph operators that he was blackmailin'." He knew Pappy knew the answer to that question. He was one of the hostages.
"Did the information Mr. Jewell gave you lead directly or indirectly to actions taken at Brown River?" It was a vague question. I hoped the Kid would give him an equally vague answer.
"May I speak to Heyes and ask him somethin', like he's my lawyer or somethin'?" The Kid looked at me nervously.
The two judges whispered. With reluctance in his voice, Pappy asked, "Was Heyes with you when you met with Mr. Jewell?"
"No, sir. He was up in the house." I was glad now that the Kid had sent me inside. He wasn't lying now.
"You may talk to him. Make it quick."
The Kid leaned over and whispered, "Did that directly or indirectly stuff mean that the information Preacher gave me led to what we did at Brown River?"
"That's what it means. He's choosing his words carefully," I answered.
"Yes, it led to Brown River," he said, and I was glad he didn't explain what really happened at Brown River.
Pappy whispered something to Brothers who nodded. Then he asked, "And did it lead to the rescue of the hostages from Gene Kindberg, often known as Mean Gene or MG, and the arrest of Kindberg and his followers?"
I like the way that was worded. Only those part of Mean Gene's gang were arrested. Members of our old gang were left in Devil's Hole. But the Kid wouldn't have to testify anything about them because of the way the question was asked.
The Kid nodded then looked at me for confirmation. I nodded slightly. "Yes, it did," he said.
"Thank you for your answers, Mr. Curry," Judge Brothers told him. The two judges looked at some papers they had brought in and pointed at things and whispered. I thought maybe they were thinking up more questions to ask the Kid.
"Jedediah Curry, please remain seated," Brothers said. The Kid was getting ready to stand but sat back down with a sigh of relief.
"Due to mitigating circumstances and the lives saved by the information Mr. Jewell imparted to you, the charges of aiding and abetting Mr. Jewell on that night are dropped and cannot be refiled. Do you understand?"
Confused, the Kid looked at me.
"Just say you understand and thank you," I told him.
He did that and then the judges talked between themselves again. So, the Kid whispered to me, "Think I understand that those words mean I'm not guilty of talkin' with Preacher. Glad about that."
"That's why they worded the questions so carefully so you wouldn't say something like you let him sleep in the blacksmith shop that night," I said very softly so no one heard.
JED 'KID' CURRY
When Heyes confirmed that I was found not guilty of helpin' Preacher, for some reason I started feelin' guilty that the charge had been dropped. I did meet with him, and he did sleep in my shop overnight. But Heyes seems pleased, and Dr. Arden patted my shoulder from behind happily. I don't trust my own emotions, feelings, and reactions since last night. But I do trust Heyes, so I'll tell myself this is a good thing. With one charge gone, my prison sentence should be shorter. I'll think about that.
My thoughts were interrupted when Brothers banged the gavel twice. "Jedediah Curry, please stand."
I did what Brothers asked, although it takes me a beat to balance on my feet. The bandages seem even tighter now.
"The next charge against you is aiding and abetting the wanted outlaw John McWinters, also known as Johnny McWinters. I want to ask you some questions about this." Brothers looked right at me as he talked. "Jedediah Curry, you may sit now and remain seated until the end of this trial."
I didn't hear that he asked me a question, so I didn't say anything. But Heyes whispered, "Say thank you," so I looked at Brothers and said, "Thank you, sir." And I remembered when I met him in Hopeful, he said someday he'd earn a 'sir' from me. Well, today he got it.
"I want you to do exactly the same thing you just did and only answer the exact question asked you. Will you do that?" Brothers asked.
"Yes, sir," I replied.
"When did you visit with Johnny McWinters?" Brothers asked.
"Weren't a visit. We didn't meet up on purpose. My wife and I were in the mercantile in Three Birds and she caught sight of him and dropped what she was lookin' at. I turned and caught a glimpse of him leavin'." I stopped there. I think I said too much because the judges are whisperin' again. For the first time, I looked across and saw the four men, men I once considered friends, watchin' me and Heyes. Jeff smiled at me and gave me a thumbs up sign. I nodded back.
Brothers coughed to get my attention again. "Mr. Curry, how is Johnny McWinters related to you?"
I need to answer in as few words as possible. "My wife's brother."
I saw Pappy nod at my answer. But Brothers was askin' another. "So, you and your wife did not go looking for Johnny McWinters?"
"We did not." Three words, that should be short enough, I thought to myself.
"What did you do when you thought you saw McWinters in the mercantile?" Brothers asked. His voice was firm, and I knew I had to be careful.
"I ran out after him."
"Why?" he asked.
I swallowed hard. This might affect the first charge. Might make them reinstate it. But then they said it couldn't be refiled.
"Mr. Curry, answer the question," Brothers pushed.
"When I saw Preacher, he also told me that Chrissy's brother, Mark, had been lookin' for her. Beat up a friend of ours to find out where she was. He wanted my wife in Devil's Hole so she couldn't tell anybody where it was located. I thought Johnny might try to grab her." I answered truthfully, hopin' I didn't say too much, but I didn't know how to say it in less words. Maybe Heyes would of, but I can't.
"Was he?" Brothers asked.
"Was he what?" I asked.
"Was he there to kidnap your wife?" he explained, impatiently. Pappy touched his arm and spoke to him. He nodded and waited patiently for my answer.
"No, I caught up with him in the alley and he told me Mark McWinters decided that if Heyes and Curry couldn't protect her, no one could. Said he was there to take of somethin' that the sheriff couldn't or wouldn't," I said.
"And did he say what that was?" Brothers asked.
I looked at Heyes. He was one of two people I told what Johnny said. He nodded. I knew he would. I need to tell the truth. "Irving Price."
"What happened then?" Brothers asked. From his question, I had said the right thing.
"I heard Sheriff Birde callin' me from behind. I turned to look at him. When I looked back into the alley, Johnny was gone." And it was then I figured that Birde must have seen Johnny in that alley. Was he listenin' to our conversation?
Again, the two judges conferred at their table, lookin' through papers and pointin'.
"Jedediah Curry, please stand," Brothers said.
Confused, I looked at Pappy who had told me to stay seated until the end of the trial. He seemed to understand. "Jed, stay seated. We are aware of the condition of your ankles. Do stay seated until this is over."
Brothers nodded and continued, "We have determined that your involvement with the wanted outlaw John McWinters was unplanned and accidental. In no way did you aid or shelter him. The charges of aiding and abetting Mr. John McWinters that day are dropped and cannot be refiled. Do you understand?" Judge Brothers asked.
"Yes, sir," I answered, but felt my heart beat faster. They must want me on the charge of killin' Irving Price.
Pappy looked right at me. "As to the last charge against you, the murder of Irving Price, how do you plead?"
"Not guilty," I answered and felt Heyes sittin' shoulder to shoulder with me. I understood now what he meant by drawin' strength from me, because just knowin' he was next to me made me stronger.
Pappy looked at Brothers who said, "I believe there is a witness to speak in Mr. Curry's defense here?"
I looked at Heyes, who shrugged his shoulders. I'm not sure who's testifyin' for me. From behind us, I heard a chair slide back as someone stood up.
"I'm testifying for the defendant," Sheriff Birde told the judges. He brought the Bible up with him and swore to tell the whole truth. He sat in the empty chair next to the judges.
Brothers did the questionin'. "Sheriff, what do you have to say in this case?"
Sheriff Birde looked right at me. "Jed Curry could not have killed Irving Price. I went out and investigated where it happened. Price was shot from someone with a long-distance rifle at least fifty yards in front of him. He was shot from the front through his left eye. I found where the killer must have stood. Jed was tracking Price from behind at my request. His tracks show he never went past where Price was killed."
"Very well, Sheriff. Anything else?" asked the judge.
Sheriff Birde looked at me and smiled. "I overheard what Johnny McWinters said to Jed in that alley, that he 'took care' of Irving Price. I know McWinters was a crack shot with a rifle and the McWinters brothers had purchased several long-range rifles about four months earlier. I believe what I overheard was Johnny McWinters confessing to his brother-in-law that he had killed Irving Price. That's all I have to say."
"Thank you, Sheriff," said Brothers and added, "We already have Mr. Curry's sworn testimony that McWinters said he took care of Irving Price."
"Gentlemen of the jury, please go into the next room to discuss your verdict. In this case it must be unanimous."
Mike Loveland, Lom, and Colin Apperson gathered around Jeff's chair with Lom kneelin' in front of him and whispered to each other quickly. Then Mike stood and said, "No need, sir. We have reached a verdict."
Pappy looked at me and Heyes. "Will you two please go wait in the living room while we review the verdict with the jury? Dr. Arden, Sheriff Birde, please stay."
I didn't know what was goin' on, but Heyes said, "Yes, Judge," for both of us. We went into the livin' room and were quiet but couldn't hear nothin'. Finally, Heyes looked at me. "With Sheriff Birde's testimony, they should have found you not guilty. Can't imagine what they are talking about," he said and started pacin'.
"How do you know Brothers?" Heyes asked me. I know he was tryin' to keep my mind off what they were decidin' in the other room.
"Met him in Hopeful, Wyomin' when I brought Mean Gene and his gang there. He was Deputy Director Aaron Brothers of the US Marshal then." I replied.
"Did you get along?"
"Asked me to join his team," I told him, rememberin' our meetin'.
Heyes smiled at my answer and resumed pacin'.
Finally, Lom came to get us but refused to say anything.
Pappy was standin' near the jury. Brothers was standin' up behind the table. "Jedediah Curry, please stand before the judges."
"Yes, sir," I said as I slowly hobbled forward. Each time I took a step pain shot through my ankles. Heyes stood right beside me again.
"Jedediah Curry, you are found not guilty of killing Irving Price, but we have added a codicil onto this trial transcript.
A codicil…that's what kept Heyes in prison for more than six months after I got out and on parole for another six months. I looked at Heyes in alarm.
"You are being remanded to the care and surveillance of Dr. Aiden Arden and will remain that way until he is assured you are no longer a threat to yourself," Brothers announced.
My eyes found the doctor quickly. I don't know what this means. "Am I goin' to a mental hospital?" I asked knowing there was panic in my voice.
The doctor put a hand on each of my shoulders and looked me straight in the eyes. I knew Heyes was still beside me. "Jed, sit down. No, you will stay with me for a while and rest. Then you can start resuming your work, but I will come with you until I'm sure you're alright. Your friends and family are free to come visit you anytime. They don't need to know any more than you are sick and I'm treating you."
His voice was kind and I have trusted him to heal my body before. I have no choice but to trust him to heal my mind. Sheriff Birde came and unlocked the handcuffs.
Colin Apperson walked briskly toward me and Heyes who sat next to me. "Jed, glad things worked out. I'm really in town to check on Rocky's parole but I was privileged to help at your trial. Our family owes you so much. You even saved my uncle, the governor's, life twice. Whatever you need, just ask."
I was overwhelmed with his words, rememberin' I needed to say somethin' positive, think positive. But I wanted to say 'nothin' anyone wouldn't have done.' My heart beat faster and then Heyes started talkin'.
"Real glad that the Kid was able to save the good man's life," he said smoothly.
And all I had to add was, "That's right."
The Heyes silver tongue was workin' as he changed the subject back to Rocky. "Colin, you said you were here as a parole check on Rocky?"
"Yes, yes, from everyone I talked to, it's going well. I have a statement from Dr Oliver Arden that Stephanie and Steven are also doing very well. So after talking to some people here I'm lifting the provision that Rocky must be shackled at night." He held out some papers. Heyes took them. "I have to get back to Cheyenne. I wish you all the best, Jed."
"Thank you, Colin," I said to his back as he hurried out the door.
Mike Loveland pushed a chair similar to Jeff's into the room. "Good to see you, Jed." I held out my hand to shake but he gave me a bear hug like I've given Heyes. Mike is the only one bigger than me that can lift me off the ground with a hug. He whispered in my ear, "Let me know if you need any help. Anything at all and I'll be here." When he stepped back, he added, "Miss Beverly is watching Mikey and Wayne Trevors. I'm told that Mikey and her Junior are a mischievous pair. Going to go see how she is doing."
"Thank you," was all I could think of to say, and it was the right thing. Mike smiled and winked. "Remember, anytime, anything."
Dr. Arden…Aiden… moved behind the rolling chair. "Jed, move to this chair. I need you to stay off those feet and ankles until they are healed."
"Yes, sir," I answered. I leaned on Heyes to stand up and pivoted to sit in the rollin' chair.
"Jed, if I hear you call me sir once more, or look down when you talk to me, I'll start to think we aren't friends."
I need to say something positive. It's important I am positive like he told me to be. "Sure, Aiden."
"We need a private moment with Jed in the living room," said Sheriff Birde as he pushed Jeff over there.
Aiden walked a few steps with us then stopped. He spoke to someone outside the room. "Give them some privacy," I heard him say.
"I'm staying with the Kid.," said Heyes with a slight growl and pushed me into the living room.
"Good, we need you to hear this, too," the sheriff answered.
Me and Heyes watched as Jeff's chair was positioned directly in front of us. He looked at his uncle who nodded. Jeff started talking.
"I need to tell you about my father," he started.
"Somethin' happen to Fritz? How can we help?" I asked.
I saw the small smile on Jeff's face. "Don't need your help this time, my friend. But thanks for the offer. Something you need to know." He looked at his uncle who had sat down in the chair at the end of the couch. He nodded encouragingly to continue.
Jeff looked me right in the eyes and said, "Fritz is not my father. His oldest brother, Floyd, was."
I looked at Heyes who had leaned toward Jeff waitin' for him to continue.
Jeff looked to the side and took a deep breath before looking in my eyes again. I didn't understand why he was tellin' us this now.
But Sheriff Birde took over the conversation. "First, Jed, I am looking forward to you calling me Frank again if you still want to after what I have to tell you."
I nodded. This sounded serious. I don't do serious very good right now.
"Jeff's father was our oldest brother Floyd Birde. And he was the perfect big brother growing up. And he became the perfect businessman, husband and father. We all looked up to him. Wanted to be him. Seemed to us younger brothers that anything he did, he did well. His wife, Jeff's mother, died having a stillborn child when Jeff was about one. And then one day about four months later, when he was home alone, he went out into his barn and hung himself. I found him. He left a note carefully placed so we would find it. He apologized for being a failure at everything. Blamed himself for everything bad that had happened to us. And said it was his punishment that his wife and baby had died."
He stopped and looked at Jeff who was still lookin' at me. I felt sorrow, deep grief startin' to overwhelm me. Jeff reached out and touched my knee. "Jed, it's important that you hear this. It will explain why my uncle did what he did to you."
I put my hand on top of his. "So sorry for you. So sorry."
"Jed, let me finish and get Aiden back in here to help you. When we were riding back from catching Shaw's men for the first time I really started listening to things you said. You sounded just like Floyd, even used the same phrases, the same words. And I thought back to recent conversations with you and I got scared. I was convinced you were getting ready to commit suicide. Couldn't think what to do so I arrested you. Didn't want to let you out of my sight."
I caught Heyes eyes. We both still had questions.
"Soon as we got back, I found Aiden. He said I did the right thing and confined you. He read to me from his medical journals. They suggest some pretty violent ways to deal with things like this. We modified everything to be as accommodating as we could…didn't know about the previous damage to your ankles. Had to file charges to legally keep you in custody. Aiden's idea was to have people you had helped talk to you and ask you to answer positively. Guess that didn't work too well."
For the first time I looked at Frank Birde and saw this had been hard on him too. "It helps. Still trying to do it."
"Good. I was upset you became so submissive about going to prison so easily. I felt guilty every time you looked down or called us sir. But Aiden and Oliver both said the fear of prison might be something we could work with to make you believe in yourself and that you didn't belong there."
Heyes was getting upset. "Well that certainly did not work."
Birde nodded. "I know. When I found the loop off of my gun twice in a row I remembered the 'soft' pickpocket hands of Jed you had talked about. Medical journals said to try and stop you from trying to commit suicide but Aiden decided we needed to let it play out and see if you remembered all you had to live for. BUT I took the bullets out of my gun."
"Think somewhere in my mind I knew that. The gun was too light," I admitted. "But in that moment I was trying to …end my life."
"Jed, you're a good friend, one of my best. And the best man I know. I couldn't let what happened to Floyd happen to you. I wish I had been there to stop him so I knew I had to stop you. Still gonna watch you closely."
"Wasn't sure how I felt about the whole thing but I need your friendship to keep me strong, keep me going when I get discouraged," said Jeff. "You're my best friend."
It was a lot to hear but the one thin' I understood was that these two and Aiden did what they did to help me. "Thank you for sharin' this with me…us." I stopped and thought about their words. "Probably stopped me from going out in the barn and doing what Floyd did. I'll admit to you, I have considered it."
"Kid?" Heyes asked the question on his mind with just that one word.
I couldn't look at him. "Frank read me right, Heyes. Sorry. Won't ever try again."
HEYES
I started shaking at the Kid's admission. "Why didn't you talk to me? How did I miss the signs?"
He looked at Jeff but answered me. "Didn't want anyone to know. Not even you. Let everyone believe I was lost in grief for Trinity Rose and that was a part of it."
Turning his head, we locked eyes and we knew we would talk about this another time but all was forgiven between us.
We were interrupted by the two judges coming into the living room with Dr. Arden. Hard for me to think of Pappy as a judge but they said in court he was duly appointed. I looked at the Kid and could see his emotions were near the surface. I moved near Arden and whispered, "Doc?"
"Don't worry, Heyes. He needs to feel his emotions again. He's been denying a lot of them for a long time." I could see he was watching the Kid closely. "How are you doing?"
I realized I was still shaking. "A lot to take in."
My attention shifted to Pappy, Sergeant Major Alan P Allen retired, as he entered the room and announced, "It's almost time to leave." He walked up to the Kid with an assured smile. "Good to see you, boy."
"Good to see you too, sir," the Kid answered. It's hard to break the habit of subservience beaten into us in prison. The last few days the Kid had proved how close that habit remained to the surface, even if we thought it was broken.
"Pappy," the older man said firmly and was met by silence.
"And I remember you agreeing to call me Aaron," Brothers added.
More silence followed as I saw the Kid struggle with something. Then he smiled, held out his hand to shake and said almost formally, "Pappy, Aaron, I owe you my thanks for today." I heard a break in his voice and knew he was trying to control his feelings.
"No thanks needed. We're just helping you like you helped us," Brothers answered for them both. "We're sorry about the codicil, Jed, but when we heard what you tried to do, we had no choice. We felt helpless. Wish you had reached out to one of us. Now, we were talking and are looking for ways we can help you. First thing we're going to do is stay right here in Three Birds and help to rebuild it. If that's alright with you."
"Yes, sir, er…I mean Aaron. I want to see this place rebuilt. It's our home," the Kid answered.
When Sheriff Birde came in, Dr. Arden came around and sat next to the Kid and watched him while the sheriff spoke to him. "Jed, we need you to be honest with us and let you know if this is going to be too much for you, if it might bring back depression that overwhelms you."
I listened carefully, too. "If anything is going to make him sink into that bottomless, colorless place again, I'm against him doing it," I said firmly, glad that I was able to call upon my outlaw leader voice.
Dr. Arden looked at me. "Have to know it you can handle it, too, Heyes. I need you both to be honest with yourselves." I looked at the Kid who was just as baffled as I was. What were they talking about?
Dr Arden continued, "Jed, what Frank is talking about is attending the funeral service for Glen. With everything going on, we didn't have a chance to have a proper burial. It's going to be held at the church cemetery in about twenty minutes. If either of you can't handle it without losing you to that depression inside of you, don't go. Everyone will understand."
"Is that why Sletten is here? And Tim and Emery Walsh? And Pappy?" the Kid asked very quietly. I didn't know what he was thinking.
"I came here to be a judge at your trial," Pappy answered.
The sheriff looked at the Kid and kept talking. "Some of your family from Phoenix will be there, too. No need to tell them anything except you were injured…your ankle bandages attest to that."
I caught the Kid's eyes and let him know this was his decision and I was with him either way. I waited for him to answer. "You're goin', right, sir… er, Aiden?" he asked.
"Yes, I'm going," Aiden assured me.
"Brothers and I are going, too. And all the men from your jury except Mr Apperson…good men every one of them. Do you need time to talk about this?" Pappy finished.
Quiet for a long time, the Kid finally asked, "Any suggestions on how to keep the depression away, Aiden?"
"It never goes away, Jed; it's a process. Medicine has a lot of different ways of dealing with it, but Oliver and I disagree with all of them. We will help you learn to handle it when it tries to take over. You too, Heyes."
"I think we'd like to attend," the Kid said, keeping his eyes fixed on mine. "Glen's family."
I smiled and repeated, "Family." I felt the grief of his loss settle with my grief from the loss of Trinity Rose. I ignored it. I'm going to be strong for the Kid.
Aiden's face grew very serious. "Jed, before we go, one more thing."
I could see fear for his family pulling the Kid's emotions up from where they were just barely contained.
"What happened to my family?" he asked, alarmed.
Aiden said it straight out; I think it was a test to see how the Kid would handle it. "They're all healthy. Chrissy needs your help. She's pregnant, again, and scared to tell you."
"What? I told her no more babies for a while," he returned quickly, his voice rising. But then he took a deep breath. "'Course, we both needed each other so much when we lost Trinity Rose…and I reached for her in the night. I need to talk to her," the Kid said.
Dr. Arden studied my cousin intently before speaking. "She tells it differently. She told me you told her you were worried about her health. That she needed to take time to heal after having triplets. And that she reached for you first. She feels guilty and is afraid you'll be very mad at Chrissy. Her words, not mine."
The Kid knitted his forehead. I know what Arden was doing, he was preparing the Kid for a difficult conversation. Thinking about his words, the Kid started to answer slowly, "Truth is we both needed each other. Does Chrissy feel guilty a lot, Aiden? Deep guilt like I feel? How can I help her?"
And that was the Kid I know. Worried about others before himself. Did the doctor see this as a good thing? I hope so. Our family is what brings the color and joy to our lives.
NOTE: We first met US Deputy Director Aaron Brothers in Chapter Seventy-Seven