May 2033: Beginning of an End Part IX.
It would be after 9pm that Monday night when Thad opened his eyes again. He found himself in bed, with David now sitting at his best friend's side, holding his hand tightly. He sighed, then realised that they were not alone in the room and that both his brother and Edith Carmichael were sitting on the other side of his bed. He could hear someone bustling about in the kitchen, and he knew that had to be Trent. He did not need to ask what was going on, as that much was obvious; he had seen the auditorium full of happy people fade to black and could recall nothing else since that moment. The grim expressions on the faces of the three people around him just added a whole new dimension to everything… "It's bad, isn't it?" he asked in a voice that horrified him, as it was so thin and reedy, hardly sounding like him at all.
"It isn't good," replied David quietly. "You gave us all quite a scare there, but you are going to live on just a little longer…"
At that there was a strangled sob from Mrs Carmichael, and Thad knew that his friend's words had obviously touched a nerve. He looked then at his brother, and said, "Hit me with it, Ollie; how long?" His brother just looked at him, tears running down his cheeks and there was no reply from David either…
"At the most, a little under 72 hours," came Trent's voice, as he had walked into the room carrying a tray of drinks just as Thad had posed his question. "As a result of that I have activated a Code Red and all of the birds are making their way to the nest as soon as they can…"
Thad nodded, then just stared up at the ceiling, his only thought being that he would soon be in the arms of his husband, and that this time their snuggles would be for all of eternity.
His brother found his voice then and said, "I called Marcia, Zoe and Benji too; they were going to head over now, but I told them it was best not to, but you can expect that they will all be popping in at some point tomorrow. Michelle is also determined to be here, but she will not be bringing little Thad with her; as we agreed, he will not be here. She has arranged for him to stay with Mike and Tina, both of whom send their love…"
"Sebastian has also told the boys what is happening, given that they will see so much going on here in the next couple of days and so many visitors. Some of them will want to come and say their own goodbyes in person too, no doubt, but only if you feel up to that," said Trent, his voice a little flatter than normal.
"I think I should be, after a bit more rest and maybe something to drink," replied Thad.
"I have some soup heating up right now," Trent responded. "I shall go and fetch it and then we will all let you have it in peace. You are going to have a busy couple of days ahead of you and the last thing you want is to be crowded when you are hungry, thirsty and tired…"
The other three people in the room took Trent's hint and headed out as soon as he returned to the room with a cup of thin soup. As she left, Edith Carmichael came over to the bed and kissed Thad gently on the forehead before she left swiftly; Trent had the suspicion then that she would not return to the room and that she had just given Thad a goodbye kiss. Thad seemed to realise that as well, as he spoke as she turned to go. "Thank you, for everything that you have done for me over the years, and for all of the love…" She nodded, then headed for the door…
David headed out next and caught up with her and offered to walk her home; he expected her to refuse, but she nodded and allowed him to take her arm. Ollie then followed, saying that he needed to clear his head and deal with the messages on his phone. Trent did not speak as he sat down beside Thad on the bed and held the soup cup to his lips so he could drink; after he had taken a little, Thad said, "There is something that I need you to do for me just now, whilst we are alone. Can you go into the bottom left-hand drawer of the chest over there and bring out the boxes that are in there? There is something that needs to be done before I go, and I am entrusting the task to you…"
Trent nodded, and placing the soup cup on the bedside cabinet, he headed over to the chest of drawers in question. On opening the drawer he had been told to, he found an old mahogany strongbox and beside it a cardboard packing box; his heart fell when he saw that the cardboard box was addressed to Thad at his now destroyed former address in Los Angeles. He said nothing, just carried them both over to Thad's bed.
"Okay, so the key to the strongbox is on my apartment keys, a small brass one. Inside it you will find letters addressed to everyone, just as Wes did when he… I want you to distribute them at my funeral, when everyone will be gathered together. That is going to be the simplest task… In the other box you will find a label to apply to the outside of it, which will let everyone know that it is for David…"
Trent nodded, then said, "I guessed that it would be when I saw the writing on the box; this is the box that Wes sent Mr Bangy to you in, isn't it?"
Thad nodded, then said, "It seemed quite appropriate to reuse it to carry its precious cargo one more time. After so long, Mr Bangy is finally being retired from duty as of now… He is in my blazer pocket, if you wouldn't mind fetching him for me…"
Trent nodded, willing himself not to let the emotions churning away inside him show. He stood up and headed to the wardrobe, where Thad's blazer was hung up neatly on a hanger. With care and reverence, he took the trusty gavel out of the breast pocket, then crossed the room with it to hand it over to Thad. A tear glistened in the Head Warbler's eye as he handled the gavel for what he knew would be the final time, before he motioned to Trent that he needed the box…
When he opened it, Trent saw that Thad had left all of the packing that Wes had used all those years before in situ; he lovingly placed the gavel back onto its bed of cotton wool, then placed more on top of it before securing a sheet of bubble wrap on top of that. Without needing to be asked, Trent was ready with the roll of packing tape that had been alongside the box in the drawer; he sealed the box up once more, then carefully placed the handwritten label in Thad's neat script that named the recipient on the box above Wes' writing, knowing that was exactly where Thad would wish it to be situated….
"Give it to him as soon as you think it is correct after I…." Trent nodded as Thad's words faltered, then went to place the two boxes back into the drawer where he had found them. "No, take them into your room now, so that you alone will be able to find them when the time comes. Whilst you are at it, take the strongbox key off my apartment keys and put it on your own keyring. I want you to have the strongbox after I pass in any case; you have always appreciated things like that, well made historic pieces with function, and it is the least gift that I can give you for all that you have done for me these last few weeks, and heck, before that… It is itemised as being yours in my will as well, so no need to worry about being challenged about having it in the aftermath either…"
Trent nodded and replied, "I will treasure it always, although I really haven't done very much at all…"
Thad did not argue with Trent over that statement, even if he felt it was totally inaccurate and one of the biggest understatements in history. He had given up his time and his own family to take care of him, something that would have tested the limits of many a strong friendship. Then there was the thing that Trent had given him that was even more precious than his love; he had given him back his estranged siblings and that was something he could never hope to repay…
By the time that David returned, Trent had taken the two boxes and hidden them both away in his suitcase, which he had then locked; it was not that he felt that his case would be tampered with, but he didn't want anyone finding things early. He had also poured away the rest of the soup that had been in Thad's cup, as he did not wish any more; Trent knew that the small amount that he had consumed was not nearly enough, but also that there was no point in forcing him to have more and then potentially being sick. Thad was drowsy again by then in any case, but he was able to insist on one thing and that was that neither David nor Trent sat vigil at his bedside all night…
"The next two days are going to be long and stressful, so you both need to get as much rest now as you can. If they come for me in the night, then they do and I don't particularly want to be taken in a room full of people anyway," Thad insisted. "I know that sounds a little harsh, but that is the kind of death I would like…"
Both David and Trent knew better than to argue with him, so once they were certain that Thad was comfortable, they left him alone in his bedroom to sleep, whilst they repaired to the sitting room. As soon as they were there, Trent checked his phone. "It appears that the Mackenzie jet will be departing from La Guardia just after 8am tomorrow, so we can expect an influx just before lunch. I will let the refectory know so that they can prepare a few extra lunches, as they will need to be fed. Rory will also be here tomorrow; Burt has meetings in Columbus, which means my husband has to be here; he thinks that Burt might pop in himself to say a farewell…"
David nodded as he checked his own messages, then added, "Gabriel is on his way to New York right now so that he can board the jet with the others; he was going to fly directly from Boston, but there isn't a seat to be had on any flight here from Massachusetts… Trent, what if Thad passes before they all get here? It will be bad enough when he dies, but if they all miss their chance to say goodbye…"
"It will be, but they will all accept it; the thing with a terminal cancer like this is that nothing can be predicted with any degree of accuracy. I always said to everyone that they were to treat each time that they saw him as if it was the last time they would see him; it was the only way that they could deal with it without setting up camp here at Dalton. Mrs Carmichael will not be back to see him again, and Thad knows that; I sensed it when she left his room earlier. She knows that there is nothing that she can do for him now and having sat at the bedside of first her dying brother and then her only son as they passed away, I am guessing that she does not wish to go through all of the heartache and pain again."
David nodded, then said, "She has never really forgiven herself over what occurred with Seth, even though she knows that she could not have saved him in any case…" Trent agreed with those words, realising that it was the truth…
The next morning Trent rose early and as soon as he climbed out of bed, he made his way quietly along the corridor to Thad's bedroom, just to see if there had been any change in the night… "He's still asleep and breathing gently," came a voice from the sitting room as he put his hand on the door handle. He turned round to see David standing in the doorway. "I woke up about ten minutes ago and checking on him was my first thought too. He just looks so small and frail lying there, and it is breaking my heart to see him just lying there like that, I'm not going to lie… When Wes died it was horrible, but it was mercifully quick for him; this is just torture for Thad and all of us as well. When my time comes, I want my end to be swift and sudden…"
Trent nodded, hoping the same for himself, although he knew that the fact that a loved one had not suffered did not make the cruelty of death any less sharp for those left to mourn… "Let's get some breakfast; I am assuming that the others will be at the airport by now and thinking about boarding the plane…"
That was indeed the case. As well as organising the company jet, Ethan had also hired a minivan; he had picked up most of the group in the West Village outside his own home, including Mitch, who had taken an early morning subway across from his home in Brooklyn, an experience which he described merely as interesting. Elliott and Adam had been up and there to say goodbye to their partners, the former also keeping a close eye on a still sleeping Evie once they all departed. Ty was not at home, having opted to go and spend the night with Dante and Lachlan. The minivan would pick up Dex in Union Square, and then Flint near the 59th Street Bridge. The atmosphere that morning was apparent by the fact that despite being so close to that landmark that had been immortalised in song by Simon Garfunkel, none of them burst out singing it, which was normally the case…
There had been another surprise for them all when they arrived at Flint's pick-up point and that was that he was not alone; Peter Smythe had been with him. He had heard the news from his uncle Sebastian and through him he had arranged to travel with the others; in his time at Dalton, he had become close to Thad, and he wanted to say goodbye as much as all the others. He was welcomed aboard, and they all suspected that he would not be the only former Warbler from Thad's time as a teacher at Dalton that would appear in the next two days. They drove on to the airport then in silence; they all knew why they were making the journey and in keeping quiet they helped to keep the emotions they all felt in check…
At La Guardia they were joined by Colin and Edward; they had their son with them, as they had not been able to get a sitter at short notice that could commit to caring for him for an indefinite period of time. They had made arrangements for Colin's mother to meet them at the airport in Columbus; she would take care of her grandson and also provide them with accommodation for as long as they needed to be in Ohio… Gabriel was also at the airport, having taken the overnight train from Boston to New Haven, where he had changed to a Metro North local train and then a connecting bus to the airport from the Bronx.
That he had Cameron at his side was also unexpected, as he had initially stated he would drive directly to Dalton. His plan had reached the ears of Jeff's cousin Luke, and he had called Edward; he had then called Cameron and told him to drive down to his place in the Hudson Valley instead and join them on the plane. They all noticed that he also had the largest bag with him of all those travellers, but no-one said anything; only Nick recalled the time of Caleb's funeral and how Thad had jokingly said that he would ask Cameron to make a casket for his ashes like the one that he had made for Caleb… He would discover in time that what he surmised might be in that big bag was indeed there; a casket that Cameron had already made before the Head Warbler even announced that he was terminally ill…
They did not take long to board the jet, strapping themselves in without a thought, which allowed the crew to get away from the city just a little bit ahead of schedule. It was a quiet flight, not even the couples or closest of friends conversing, everyone deep in thought. They all knew why they were together and why they were making the trip; it was not a subject that they wished to discuss or even think about, and silence was the best way to ensure that it remained unspoken…
One of the Dalton school buses had been sent to the airport in Columbus to collect the group flying in from the east coast but prior to their arrival, Trent and Sebastian had been busy. The boys that lived in the Warbler dorms had been asked to get up a little earlier than was usual and as a result they were the first to arrive at the refectory for breakfast that day. The mood was melancholy; indeed, there was an air of regret and despair lying across the whole school, one that had been there since the news that Thad would pass soon had been announced. After their meal they headed back to the dorms and were greeted there and ushered into their common room by the two older men. They had a simple message for them; it was not compulsory, but those of them that wished to say a final farewell to Thad could do so now.
A little over half of the boys asked to have that chance, and most filed in with others just so that they had a little extra support. However, the current Head Warbler, Owain, asked to go in alone; he wanted to thank Thad for all that he had done for him, the little things that had given confidence and pride to a shy, lonely boy with an unusual name. Thad responded by telling him how proud he was of the young man he now saw before him; that caused Owain to start crying, and Thad had taken his hand and held it until they subsided, before they bade each other farewell…
The last of the Warblers to walk in was little Wes, who decided that this was no time for the usual formalities he observed at Dalton. "Hello, Uncle Thad… I don't know how to feel right now, because I am not sad to be losing you, but happy that you will be with Uncle Wes at last. You will both come and see me sometimes, won't you? I can let you know how everything in the world of Dalton Academy is going…"
"Try keeping me away," replied Thad. "You are such a good kid and I think that you will go on to do great things; in fact, I have a suspicion that you might be the Head Warbler one of these days. I just want you to remember one thing and that is to be happy most of all; sometimes that involves taking a risk and setting yourself up to get hurt, but I don't think that will be the case for you… I suspect that your feelings will be reciprocated. You have family that will not care who you love, so don't end up saying nothing like my husband, or your papa…"
Wes blushed at Thad's words, as he knew exactly what he was alluding to, and he wasn't so sure that what he was saying was actually the case. He didn't know if he was ready to risk everything and end up losing the good thing that he already had; in that, he was doing exactly what his papa had done all those years ago… When the boy left, Thad was only disappointed that Tim had not elected to come up; it had to be the boy's choice, but he had wanted to repeat the words he had just said to Wes to the other half of the equation…
The boys had to head to their classes as usual after that, which gave Sebastian a window to head in and see Thad before the hordes arrived. He had witnessed first hand how red Wes' face had been as he had left the Head Warbler's apartment minutes before, and he had suspicions as to why the boy had looked so uncomfortable. He walked into Thad's room, and before he even sat down, he asked, "Did you just tell little Wes that he needed to talk to Tim and declare his undying love to him? I ask because the poor boy was almost the colour of a London bus as he headed out…"
Thad smiled, and replied, "I did, because time is a precious commodity; the last thing we want for him is that he ends up like Jeff, spending the next three years mooning over his best friend, both for his sake and the sake of everyone else in the building…"
Sebastian couldn't help himself and he chuckled, recalling vividly how frustrated he used to get with the blond in his own time as a student at Dalton. "I bet you were hoping to give Tim a similar speech… well, he chose not to come up and let me tell you now that I will not be relaying those words to him on your behalf."
"Oh, I agree and would not expect you to in any case; I suspect that you will get frustrated enough in due course and take your own action over it…"
Sebastian snorted at that and shook his head, even if he had to admit that there was a grain of truth in the statement. "I don't know about that, because Skylar is not at all like you and doesn't believe in pushing people into things. I mean, he would never coerce someone into taking up a teaching career by saying that he was tired and manipulating them into just helping out, then adding a few drama classes on the side…"
"Point taken, but do you regret any of that now?"
Sebastian smiled and said, "No, not one bit of it; in fact, agreeing to it might have been one of the best decisions of my life…" Then the expression on his face changed, and he lowered his voice. "Thad, just between us, am I right in thinking that you knew you were sick back then? I have done some reading and well, the tiredness and the stomach pains are both early warning signs. As the son of two obsessive medics, you must have suspected something was seriously wrong…"
Thad said nothing at first, a little surprised that it was Sebastian that was asking him this and had worked it out; he had been waiting for Trent to realise, or David, but they had said nothing so far. "Honestly, I did have an inkling, but as I saw it, it wasn't a bad thing that was happening to me… I think that you will understand why I kept quiet, because you understand how it feels to be separated from the people you love with the distance you had from your maman and Julian for so long…"
Sebastian sighed and nodded, then cautioned, "I do, but David certainly would not. I will not repeat a word of this little conversation, nor will I tell Nick and Jeff that you might have just traumatised their son…"
Trent was waiting in the sitting room when Sebastian emerged from the bedroom, and at his side sat Aaron Carmichael. Sebastian smiled at his old headmaster, and it was returned before the latter made his way to Thad's bedroom.
"Nick just sent a text to say that they have just landed," said Trent, "so I would say that we have about thirty minutes before we have a queue of people waiting to head in and see Thad. As for David, he has gone out for a walk, which probably means that he has headed up to Wes' grave again; before he went, he said something about us getting a new headstone prepared due to the fact that he will not be buried up there on his own for much longer…"
As Sebastian absorbed that fact, Aaron Carmichael had taken a seat on the edge of Thad's bed and had taken his hand in his own. "I was thinking back last night and amongst all of the things that I recalled about you, my boy, one stuck in my mind. In your first term here, you had a really severe stomach flu; it was so bad that Edith and I took turns in sitting by your bed all night, holding your hand just as I am doing now…" He sighed, then said, "She will not be coming over again, but I think you know that; she said her last goodbye last night… I do wish that this had not happened to you, because you had so much more to give the world, especially Dalton; you would have been a worthy successor to me as Principal one day. However, we have to accept life for what it is; we both know that if Wes had only been a few seconds later in leaving that diner in Harvard that fateful day, then he might still be here with us… You would have made such a happy couple if he had lived, and I suspect that you will make one up in heaven now. At times, I feel that it will not be too long before I come and join you both and witness that first hand…"
"When that time comes, and hopefully it will not come anytime soon, we will all be there to welcome you, especially myself, Seth, Wes and Blaine. The truth is that to all of us, you were more like a father to us than our actual fathers ever were…"
"Just as all of you were like sons to Edith and me," replied Aaron. No more was said, as they were content just to sit there, hands held, feeling the mutual love that existed between them…
Aaron Carmichael would step back out into the overcast day just as the school bus that had collected those at the airport drew up outside the dorm building. He greeted each of the boys in turn, nothing that the expression on the face of each one of them was identical; all of them were feeling grief and pain already and that was before Thad had passed away. It would not be a tsunami of emotions that hit them this time, as it had been with Wes; they had had time to prepare for this. However, even that time had not been adequate to make this moment an easy one.
Inside, Trent and Sebastian had been making plans as to how best to deal with the volume of visitors they were expecting; they had decided to put those that they knew would be arriving on the bus into pairs, and then have them draw lots as to the order in which they went up to see Thad. In most cases it would be couples and close friends that went up together, but they had ended up pairing Cameron with Mitch, and Gabriel with young Peter Smythe. In the draw, that latter pairing was awarded first place, and both took deep breaths before they headed up the stairs, Gabriel's arm wrapped around the youngest of the group present as they prepared themselves for the sight they were about to see…
Trent had also set things up so that when they came back down from seeing him, it would be via the back staircase, directed into the private study room by the dorm kitchen, where he had laid out drinks and snacks; that arrangement gave those that had just said their goodbyes to have some privacy afterwards to deal with any tears that fell. He went to that room to be there as moral support and thus bore witness to the moment when Peter walked in holding up a sobbing Gabriel, not that the younger man was not exhibiting the full gamut of emotions himself…
As he dispensed the care that was needed, there was one thought in Trent's mind, and that was where David might be as this was going on, as he had been away for his walk for a longer time than he had expected. What he did not know was that David had walked not to Wes' grave but down to the hospice and was currently sitting there with Hayden. The doctor was letting David talk out all of his feelings as he prepared to witness the death of his best friend. That was of course something that Dr MacLeod was used to doing and his responses and advice did give David a degree of comfort.
The fact that there was also a quiet space in the hospice where he could go and be alone and pray further eased his soul. David knew that he would have to return to Dalton eventually; the biggest worry in his mind was that Thad would pass away whilst he was at the hospice. He knew that his friend did not want a bedside vigil during his dying moments, but he wanted to at least be in the same building when that moment came. He was startled to discover that it was almost two in the afternoon when he decided to head back to the school and he hurried back to the Academy, also conscious that by now the others would have arrived and would probably be wondering where he was at such a pivotal moment…
David arrived back at the dorms a little out of breath and was surprised to discover that only Trent was present, the others all having headed to the refectory for lunch. He smiled at David but did not enquire as to where he had been, as such thing were not important in the grand scheme of things; all that mattered at that moment was the man lying in his bed upstairs. "We have made a start on getting them all up to see him; there have been a lot of tears shed, but everyone has now been up, which has allowed us to call a halt to let Thad have some rest. The last people to go up were Skylar and Julia; he was remarkably okay, but she fell apart as soon as she left the room… I am expecting that Thad's oldest brother, and his two sisters will arrive at some point, but right now he is on his own. Why don't you go up and sit with him just now? He hasn't eaten anything so far today, but maybe he would for you…"
David nodded, but he knew that he would not try and force even a spoonful of soup between Thad's lips if he did not want any of it; it was pointless in so many ways given his prognosis. He headed up to Thad's bedroom and the first thing he saw as he entered was the cup of soup; it was little more than stock, so difficult was it now for Thad to digest anything. He was aware that his best friend's eyes were on him then, before moving to the cup of soup. "Trent asked me to try and get you to have some, but if you don't want any, then that is fine by me," David said as he sat down by Thad's bed.
"Not hungry," said Thad in a small voice. "Water maybe…"
David nodded, poured a glass of fresh water out, then held it to his friend's lips, tipping it up so he could drink. Thad sipped a little, then shook his head to indicate that he had taken enough of it for now…
"Keep an ear out for Trent," David whispered into Thad's ear, then with a conspiratorial wink he picked up the soup cup and drank some; he shrugged as Thad shook his head at him. "It will keep Trent happy if he thinks that you have had some of it; plus, we have three doctors expected to arrive at some point and you know as well as I do how some medics can be…"
Thad nodded, then said, "Be kind to them; they aren't bad people deep down. They will also be giving my parents the comeuppance that they deserve on Monday at the board meeting. I wish that I was well enough to be in that boardroom in person to witness that moment…"
"If your parents walked in and saw you sitting there, they would immediately smell a rat," said David sagely, then continued. "However, I think that you might be able to witness it at close quarters if you wish, as none of them will see you in the room because…" Then he stopped talking, as talking about afterwards was much too hard…
They sat in companionable silence for a while and then Trent knocked on the door, walking in with Marcia Harwood at his side. He introduced her to David, then picked up the soup cup; his eyes widened momentarily, then narrowed as he looked right at David. There was much to much soup missing from the cup to fit Thad's current appetite and in all honesty, he had fully expected none of it to have been consumed. He did not say a word about it to his friends, but Thad had seen the expressions on his face and knew that his best friend had been rumbled…