Troubles, and Their Solutions.
Nick would arrive home from work that evening a little earlier than usual, as for once all of his trains on the subway turned up as he stepped onto the platform, actually connected as they were meant to and ran on time. He was glad of that as that Friday saw him with a busy weekend ahead; he had the usual supermarket and Union Square market food runs to do the next morning before they headed out after lunch to catch the train out to Port Jefferson and the beach house. Of course, in an ideal world, they would be joining the exodus from the city that night, but all that would mean that the trains and the coaches to Long Island would be packed out and their journey would be uncomfortable as a consequence. Such trips had been complicated before because they had to make accommodation for Caleb; he had not particularly liked long journeys in his carrier at any time, but even more so over the last couple of years. Jeff had not wanted to leave him even to Mike's care even for a night by then either, so they had rather neglected their holiday home.
As he entered the house and saw the time, he wondered if he could actually make the trip to the Stop n Shop that evening, once he had eaten dinner. It would allow them to leave earlier the next day, but it would all depend on what Jeff felt about heading over to Brooklyn in a couple of hours, as there was no way that Nick would be making the trip alone. He walked into the house quietly and immediately smelt the pie cooking in the oven, which made him feel hungry. He hung up his jacket then placed his bag in the study, taking out his laptop to store it in the safe as he did not intend using it all weekend. He had just done so when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder, and as he had not heard anyone approach, he almost jumped out of his skin, spinning round to see Wes standing there.
"Dad, I thought that I should warn you that there is something in the garden that wasn't there when you left this morning," his son said cryptically. Nick sighed, wondering what on earth could have happened…
He headed down into the kitchen where Jeff was busy with the steamed vegetables that would be the accompaniment to the pie. He could see that there were no potatoes amongst them, so he assumed that they were in the oven roasting alongside the pie. He hugged his husband and kissed him on the cheek, making the blond smile, then headed over to the open door to the garden. He saw it as soon as he looked out, and he turned back to look at Jeff with one eyebrow raised as a question mark…
"I wasn't wanting any fuss this time, so I decided not to tell anyone it was coming. Admittedly Mike saw it arrive and ended up here as it was put in place, but that was entirely by chance."
"I can understand why you would do that; it looks very nice and is entirely appropriate for both Caleb and our garden," replied Nick, not asking how much it had cost, as such things seemed wrong in the circumstances.
"My old classmate did it for cost of materials, so it didn't break the bank either," his husband said without being prompted, and Nick had to chuckle at that, as it just proved how well they knew each other and what the other would be thinking. With that the conversation turned to more mundane matters, such as supermarket trips that evening and what Jeff had experimented with as a topping for the pie…
A photo of the grave marker was put on their joint Facebook page that evening by Jeff as soon as they dinner dishes had been placed in the dishwasher, and just before they headed out as a family to the supermarket in Brooklyn. By the time that they were perusing the aisles of the store, they had received a lot of comments about it, all agreeing that it was a fine tribute to their pet. That evening their shopping was a combination of their usual weekly needs at home, plus a few other items that they would be taking with them to Port Jeff, as they were cheaper in the city than in the smaller supermarket in the Long Island town. There were a couple of special offers that were added onto Nick's otherwise rigid list of requirements, which meant that as always, they left the store laden down with bags. However, they would be heading straight home that evening, unlike on a Saturday when they went back via Union Square, so the load seemed lighter; indeed, Jeff asked out loud why they didn't do their weekly shop on a Friday night all the time…
As they turned back into their own street, they spotted Ethan just heading away from their front door and hailed him. He came back but said very little as he helped them inside with all of the shopping, then headed out dutifully with Jeff to see the grave marker in situ. That done, he came back in and asked if Nick could spare him a few minutes for a word about a legal situation in private. He agreed, although he wondered how he could be of help as his knowledge of more parochial law was not as up to date as his knowledge of global law and took Ethan up to the study where they would not be disturbed.
Once the door was closed and Nick had motioned to Ethan to take a seat, the latter handed Nick the application form that had bothered him since he found it that afternoon. The lawyer read it, then waited for more information.
"It's Lucy's prison," said Ethan bluntly. "I just wanted a quick take on what your opinion, as a human rights lawyer, would be if I was to agree to the Trust giving them the funds but with a caveat attached stating that she could not benefit from the scheme in any way."
"I can understand where you are coming from there; if she had hurt Jeff the way she hurt Drew, then she would not be getting anything from me either. However, trying to impose a caveat of that nature on the prison would be problematic in the extreme. They state in the letter that they wish to improve facilities in general, and how on earth could they do that without every inmate in the facility benefitting in even the smallest of ways? Hard as it is going to be, my advice is that you should not attach any conditions to the funding; it will be hard, but you will be occupying the sunlit moral high ground in doing so. If you can't do that without a qualm, then you would be better off not providing any funding at all…"
Ethan nodded, and replied, "I thought that would be the gist of what you would say. I know you are right, but it is so hard to be good and Christian in these circumstances…"
Before he left, Nick advised Ethan to do one more thing as a matter of urgency, but he already knew that he had to do that. He decided that he would not do so that evening though, leaving telling Drew until the following morning. He did not show him the letter, just came out with it over the breakfast dishes once Evie had gone to get ready for the day. Drew looked at him, then sighed. "It is a bit like the whole situation with the Trust's donation to Great Ormond Street Hospital all over again; the cause was valid, the motive good, but alas, someone was involved in that too…"
"Don't remind me, because I still feel so guilty about that, because you ended up getting hurt!"
Drew smiled and took Ethan's hand in his. "The difference this time is that she can't hurt me and maybe this is exactly the sort of thing that she needs to help her become a better human being…" Drew paused, as he saw Ethan questioning his last words in his mind. "She is a human, if only just; she is a bad one, I will grant you. I want you to give them the money, with my blessing, because dozens of other women will benefit, not just her. We can't deny them the opportunities that this scheme will bring just because she is there; if we do that, then Lucy will have won. Plus, if we tell them to mention my name in connection with it, chances are she will refuse to have anything to do with the scheme anyway…"
Ethan chuckled, then said, "Okay, if you are sure…"
"I have never been more sure of anything in my life. Now, let us stop brooding on this beautiful summer's day and go out and enjoy it? We could get a picnic together and the three of us could head over to Governor's Island. We could go up to Union Square and buy stuff and just have a relaxing day…"
"That sounds perfect," Ethan replied, then added, "I am so glad that you and Evie are in my life you know… The two of you help to keep me sane and give me so much happiness in return…"
"Likewise," Drew replied. As Ethan got up and headed out of the room to get dressed in something more appropriate for a picnic, his best friend smiled and hoped that in fifty years' time they would still be like this, an important part of each other's life. He would never admit it, certainly not to the man in question, but he was a little bit in love with Ethan…
On that same Saturday morning, Beats was still on a high from his surprise vacation to Japan the previous week; once again, Elliott had managed to organise everything without him even suspecting a thing. This time the trip had been more moving; to stand in Hiroshima and see the Genbaku Dome and realise that he was effectively standing at Ground Zero, had left him feeling much more emotional than he thought it would. The fact was that the shadow of what happened that day still hung over the world, but frustratingly no nation wanted to be the one that was brave enough and announce that it was giving up its nuclear weapons first and wait for the others to follow suit…
Elliott had been even more emotional, and he confessed that was down to stories his late grandmother used to tell about those dark days in October 1962 when the world had been on the brink of Armageddon. She told him how some of her wealthier neighbors had fled to the Catskills and the western half of New Jersey, but she had laughed at them for doing so; as she said, who would really wish to survive in a world that would be plunged into chaos?
That had only been one day of their visit and there had been so much else to see and experience. His comic collection might have grown a little larger as well of course… That morning however brought a letter that he had been dreading and his mood changed the moment he saw it. At the insistence of Elliott, he had made an appointment with his ophthalmologist before he left for a comprehensive assessment, with no possible test left undone. He had not wanted to go that far, but his husband was insistent that they needed to know the worst now rather than wait and see…
The letter was bulky, a mass of pages detailing the results of every test and it was not something that he wanted to read alone. He was alone in the house, as Elliott was on the early shift at the Spotlight. He resolved that he could only open it once his husband was home and that there was no-one else, not even Flint, that could be a substitute. He placed the letter in a drawer, then went to get dressed in smart casual clothes. On a whim, he had decided that it would be a good morning to attend service at the synagogue. He could say that he was there to meet with Dante and Lachlan, or Flint, or even the Rosenfelds for that matter; even if they were not present, he would be welcome.
In the end it was his best friend that he found there that Saturday morning, but he did not tell him his problems. Flint, however, was smart enough to realise that something was troubling his oldest friend; he did not explicitly ask him if he was okay at the end of the service, as he knew Beats would clam up, so he settled for hugging him and pointing out that he would always be there for him. That he was welcome to come and visit anytime and that he would always have time for a chat. Beats smiled and said that he knew, before heading out of the door and in the direction of home; that rapid departure did nothing to alleviate Flint's concerns…
When Elliott arrived home from work, he walked into the kitchen to discover his husband sat at the table with the unopened letter in front of him. He also knew exactly what it was and after grabbing himself a cup of coffee, he sat beside his husband.
"I haven't opened it because I am too afraid that what is inside is worse than we thought; that it is all bad news. I just couldn't cope with that alone and I only wanted to share it with you first…"
"I understand – in any case, it will be easier if we read it together. Would you like me to open it for you?"
"No, I need to do it," replied Beats, taking the envelope firmly in his hands. He sat there for a minute without going any further, then taking a deep breath he ripped it open, carefully removing the wad of papers inside. He knew that the bulk of it would be the official results of the tests his husband had ordered; he noticed that there was a large bundle and a much smaller one, so he placed the former to one side, knowing they would be filled with medical terms and jargon that would be hard to comprehend and probably fill him with more fear than necessary; he guessed correctly that the smaller bundle would be a covering letter written by the specialist which would summarise all that was in the tests in layman's terms. He opened them up and began to read, Elliott sitting at his side and saying nothing; he did not even attempt to read the letter over his husband's shoulder. He would find out all that it said in due course…
After a few minutes Beats sighed, then set down the letter, pushing it towards his husband. "There are no surprises in there; just as my optician said, my right eye is deteriorating at a faster rate than my left eye and that based on the speed of the changes he has witnessed since my last appointment, he estimates that I will be more or less blind in my right eye in 8 to 10 years' time. The strain that will then place on my left eye will lead to it deteriorating more rapidly as well… The best-case scenario will see me effectively blind before my sixtieth birthday; at worst, I will lose my vision not long after I turn fifty. At least I might get to see my grandchildren, if Dante and Lachlan decide to have them. Right, so I need to make the most of the next decade, because I will see very little after that."
Beats did not cry at the news, because he was aware that such emotion would be pointless. On seeing that, Elliott took a deep breath or two and managed to blink back his own tears. "Okay, at least we know for certain now, and we can begin to make plans as to how we will best deal with this as a couple. For a start, I want you to write out a bucket list of all places that you would like to see, wherever they are in the world, and we will do our best to get you there. it should be easy with all our friends on our side…"
"No, I don't want them to know, at least not yet and I am including Dante and Ty on that list of people. There is nothing that any of them can do to alter the facts of the matter, so I don't want them to spend the time that they should be enjoying their lives worrying about me. I also don't want all of the sympathetic looks that will come with such a confession, because that would kill me."
"I can understand that sentiment and the motivation behind it, but you have to realise that when the time comes and we can no longer hide the truth, they might not be as understanding of the fact you kept it a secret. You have to face up to that as well…"
"I know, but we will cross that bridge when we come to it; for now, it is just the two of us. Now, let us have a fresh cup of coffee and then we can make a start on that declutter that we know has to happen…"
Elliott nodded and then excused himself for a moment to use the bathroom. Beats knew as his husband left that he was going into that small room to cry; he also knew that he himself could not allow his tears to start, because right now he feared they might never stop. He had been dealt a cruel hand by fate; it was all part of the great cosmic plan that Wes referred to from time to time, and he had no choice but to accept it. It was written that he would go blind, just as it had been written that Finn, Kurt, Blaine, Wes and Seth would all be taken from them at an early age. There was no point in raging against it, as it could not be defeated. Resigned to his fate, Beats got up to make a fresh pot of coffee, deciding that such a task was one of the first he would need to try and master with a blindfold in place…
By the time that Elliott came back, his face wet from the wash he had just given it to try and remove all traces of the tears he had just shed from it, Beats had begun to compile a list of all the simple tasks he completed every day that he would need to try and do blindfolded. He had tried to fill the coffee machine with water whilst keeping his eyes closed; although he had been standing right in front of it with the jug of water when he closed them, he still managed to spill quite a quantity of water onto the countertop. It had been tricky to hold the full jug and first locate the machine, then find the filling hole and pour the water into it. He explained that to his husband when he returned, and he had nodded.
"I think that we might need to get a lidded jug with a long spout; something like a teapot would actually be ideal," mused Elliott.
"Yeah, as long as nobody sees it and makes tea in it," replied Beats with a grin. "It might be easier just to get a funnel, as that would widen the aperture for filling it up."
"Or we could just get a new coffee machine with a removable water tank; that way you could take it directly to the tap, fill it, then put it back in," admitted Elliott. "Of course, we also need to have hot and cold taps you can easily tell apart."
"Different tap heads would be the simplest solution there, so that I can tell from a touch which one is which…" replied Beats. "There are so many things that we can buy now as well that will help me live a normal life; alarms that will ensure that you don't overfill a cup, voice activated devices and of course, talk to type. We can get everything in the house linked into a smart app on my phone, except for the lights. There would be no need to have them on…"
"It would still need to be done for my benefit, my dear," his husband responded with a grin. "I am not going around turning on the lights at switches when everything else in the house is voice activated! There is also the fact that a seeing eye dog will function better with them on too…"
Beats laughed, then said, "Are we maybe getting a little ahead of ourselves in discussing that?"
"No, we are merely being practical. Of course, there is something else we need to consider and that is whether we should consider moving. I love this house, but it isn't the most practical and accessible…"
"No, we are not even going to consider that. I want to stay here with all my friends close by."
"That isn't exactly what I meant. I have been thinking about this conundrum since you told me how bad things were getting, and there is a solution that gives us the best of both worlds. Do you think that if they knew how bad things were, Ethan and Drew might consider swapping houses with us? It would remove all the stairs inside the house and leave only the outside ones for you to negotiate. We would keep all our neighbours that way too. It would be win, win for us…"
Beats said nothing in reply, because his mind was now awhirl with the new idea that his husband had just given him. It would make so much sense and give them the best of both worlds. However, it would also mean telling his two friends exactly how bad his eyes were…
The discussion moved on, and it would be an hour later when Beats returned to the topic. "I suppose that we could take Ethan and Drew into our confidence, tell them what is happening and ask if they would even consider swapping homes with us…"
"It would be a start, but then we have to face facts. If they agree to it, then we would need to ask Jeff as he is our landlord. That means that Nick needs to know too. We really should be telling our kids the news before any of them…"
Beats sighed, knowing that Elliott was right and there was no avoiding that most difficult of conversations. "Okay, but I want you to talk to the boys first, make it quite plain to them that I don't want any sympathetic words, or to embark on lengthy discussions about treatments and the like, because that will not help me at all."
"I can make that plain for friends, but it won't be so simple with Dante and Ty, because their emotions won't allow them to hold back. You are one of their dads, and this sort of news will hurt them."
"Let's invite Dante and Lachlan over for lunch next Sunday and make it plain to Ty that he needs to be here as well; we can tell them and then we have time to process it through the afternoon. However, I think that we could have a quiet word with Ethan about the idea of moving before that, as he will not tell anyone, even Drew, if we ask him not to. He might not want to move and if he says no, we are staying here."
Elliott nodded, although he suspected that as a fellow member of the bird brotherhood was in need and they could help, neither Ethan nor Drew would object to the idea; the same was true for Jeff. Evie might however be a spanner in the works as she would see her bedroom as her space and could get upset about the prospect of having to move at her age. Still, the conversations needed to happen and, in his opinion, the sooner the better. Beats would need to get used to the new house before his eyes started to fail, otherwise he would suffer problems navigating it from memory…
As is so often the case in life, fate would intervene and bring that conversation ahead. That evening, Ethan appeared at the door, and having come upstairs, he asked if they could keep an eye on Evie for a couple of hours the following day. "I will put my card on the table here; there is an issue that I need to talk to Drew about in private, because it concerns Evie and her future. My mother has indicated to me that she and my dad want to pay for her to attend a private high school here in Manhattan. Drew had already decided that she would not be going to Crawford, because he doesn't want to have her so far away and, in all honesty, I don't think she would have wished to go there in any case. However, I don't know what he will make of my parents' intervention either, especially as my mother is set on sending her to Notre Dame, because it had good results and is close to home…"
"I am guessing by the name that it is a Roman Catholic school, and neither you nor Drew are all that religious…" began Beats.
"Neither are my nominally Protestant parents, but it does have very good academics, plus a focus on science and business. It is also an all-girls school. Drew has no idea that she has offered yet, and I need to ask him when Evie isn't around before we discuss the concept with her, as she will need to approve of the idea too."
"We can look after her, no problem. However, as it happens, we actually have something that we need to ask you and Drew," replied Beats. "Come and sit down and read this letter…"
Five minutes later Ethan was holding back on the emotions he felt, knowing that his friend would not want to see them. The fact that his friend was going to be blind in such a short space of time was devastating, and he could understand why they had suggested a house swap. It was a very practical solution to a forthcoming problem and made such sense to him. However, it would also be quite an upheaval for him, Drew and Evie. They had been talking about redecorating recently, as Evie wanted a more grown-up room, but this idea made such things less of a priority. He agreed to run the idea past Drew the next day when they discussed the other matter; after all, if there were to be fireworks, it was best to have them all on the same day…
It would be Drew that came to fetch Evie the following day and the fact that he was smiling as he did was a source of relief to both Beats and Elliott. He sent his daughter downstairs on her own, then turned to Beats. "I am not going to say how sorry I am to hear about your condition, because that is the last thing you need or want to hear. Both Ethan and I have no issue whatsoever with swapping houses with you, nor can I see Jeff having a problem with it either. Evie should be okay with it as well, as she has been hinting that she would like to live higher up for a while now; she is at that age when she wants a bit more privacy and she seems to think a higher floor for a bedroom would give her that. A room on the top floor would delight her…"
"That's good to know; I guess now I just need to approach Jeff, but that won't be straight away. We need to tell Dante and Ty about my eyes and then the potential house move," replied Beats.
"I understand. Ethan and I won't say a thing to anyone, even Evie, until we hear from you," said Drew in reply, before he went on, "I take it that Ethan also mentioned the other little topic we had to discuss today, namely his mother's offer to pay for Evie to attend an all-girls high school?"
"He did mention it, yeah…"
"Well, he was quite surprised to discover that I had absolutely no issue with the idea. I want Evie to have the best of everything. There is actually a woman at my work that went to Notre Dame, and she also has two daughters that are enrolled there now; we were talking about Evie going to high school and she told me all about it. According to her, although it is nominally a Roman Catholic school, there is no strict compliance to that these days; it is no longer obligatory to attend Mass or go to confession. The teachers are some of the best in their profession and the class sizes are smaller than average; they also have a wide and varied curriculum on offer. The final decision will be Evie's, of course, because she is happy in her class group at school and the nominated high school for them is also very good. Whatever choice she makes, at least she will be back home every night, and that is a key thing for both of us. She was dead set against the idea of going to Crawford, but not because she would struggle with the idea of being away from home per se, but because she would be worried about me. I guess that with all we went through in London, we have a closer relationship than some father's and daughters…"
It would be a just over a week later when Beats would head to see Jeff with Ethan at his side; he agreed to the house swap without a second's hesitation when Beats explained to him the reason behind it. He would ask Grace to write them up new leases, with the rent remaining exactly the same as it was now. He also offered them the use of the guest apartment as well, should any major redecoration works make their place uninhabitable. Neither party thought that would be necessary as the decorative schemes were fairly neutral. The only exception they could envisage was in the bedrooms that their children would inhabit. Beats could not imagine Ty being too happy at his age with the pinks and pastels of Evie's room, and Ethan knew that the girl in question would want something a little less masculine in her new room. The move would be easy for another reason; they could hire one set of movers and just have them carry the bulkiest furniture between the two apartments, saving them the need to negotiate the stairs…
When the news of the impending move became public, as such things always do, there was naturally speculation as to why it was taking place, but as Beats had decided he would limit who knew about his sight problems, they had to make up a plausible alternate reason. The rule was so strict that Jeff had not disclosed it to Nick, nor had the Head Warbler been told the truth; instead, they were told like everyone else that it was down to Evie's desire to have a bedroom on a higher floor…
The young lady in question had also been told about her adoptive grandmother's offer, and she had come to a decision quickly, namely that she would accept the opportunity. It transpired that two of her classmates already had older sisters at Notre Dame; those girls loved it there, and the two classmates would be joining them there in due course. Evie had an invite to a school open day in early September and Mrs Mackenzie planned to be there with her. Both Drew and Ethan were also hoping to approach the latter's mother to see if she would be prepared to talk to Evie about another issue that they felt would soon arise, namely her periods. They knew that both Tina and Kitty would offer to have that chat with her if they asked, but it would be better for them all if a relative was able to do it instead…
As the fall approached, Jeff had to admit that he found his studio a little empty now; the cushion that still sat in the sunniest spot now permanently vacant. He could not bring himself to remove it though, as it was almost another memorial to his well-loved pet in his private space. He still had a lot of Caleb's photos on display in the room, along with the sketches he had made of him pinned to the wall. He also knew that he would never draw him again, not even from memory; the basic shorthand sketch that he had done so often never to be repeated. He had tried it once and all that had happened was a sheet of paper stained with tears…
He worked away on his projects, but every so often he would pause to look at one particular photo, one that Nick had snapped in their first week in the West Village house, in which Caleb sat in his lap as he sketched, observing him intently. One day he might be able to draw a cat into his pictures again, but for now they were absent. All of those that used his talents to illustrate their works knew of that and it was something that they respected.
Meanwhile at Dalton, a new term had begun, the school campus once more echoing to the sound of teenage boys. The newest freshmen were by and large over the homesickness that even the cockiest seemed to suffer and were fully immersed in the friendly environment of a school were all were welcome, and no-one was ever excluded. It was Dalton's mission after all to produce men that were well educated and tolerant of difference, a grounding that would serve them well in the modern world.
A new session had also begun for the Warblers, with auditions for the freshmen taking place and a new council established. Sebastian was right in the heart of it all and loving it; his proposal this year was that they needed to mark a momentous occasion, namely that it was now a century since the Warblers had first performed outside of the school in a show choir competition. He had the idea that the boys should don clothes typical of the 1930s for their performances, style their hair in the correct way and perform the songs that were the hits of that era…
There was approval of that from students and faculty, and for that reason, Thad found himself trawling through the oldest of the school records to see if he could find any mention of the songs that the Warblers had performed in that first competition; Sebastian had a wild idea that they could possibly reprise that set list, although Thad wasn't quite so sure if that was a great idea. Still, he was grateful to be able to sit in the quiet of the dusty attics, as it allowed him to get over the stomach pain he was suffering from. He was used to stomach aches by now, an almost constant feature of his life, but this was worse than usual…
That did not bother him though, and that it was more acute actually made him smile a little. He was pretty sure, as a son of a medical couple, that he knew what was causing it, and if he was correct, then he accepted it with warmth and gratitude…