A longish chapter this time! Thank you CentauRita, Goldielover and marleemiller5769 for your reviews and reading my nonsense!
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That was the first time he came home with bruises. Judging by the expression on his face, he knew I was going to lose my shit, and he refused to look up at me. I was too shocked to yell, though, immediately going to hug him.
"What'd he do to you?" I rubbed his back as he leaned up to wrap his arms around my neck.
"I'm okay...one of the other workers upset him," he mumbled into me.
"He hurt you, though? What are the bruises from, Carlisle?" Growing frantic, I ran my hands over him. I was ready to hunt down that asshole at the first sign of pain.
"He didn't hit me, Gar, he was just too rough when he touched me…" He wrapped one of my hands in his, stopping my panic. "It's okay; I'm alright." His voice was soft and he was trying to sooth me, but he was also struggling to hold back tears.
I cautiously pushed the edge of his shirt up, sighing at the red marks across his waist and around his arms. "You're not sore?" I checked, watching him carefully. Even if he wasn't, he was bloody freezing.
He shook his head. "N-no...I just really want a shower...need to get the feeling of his hands off."
Sighing, I kissed him. For a moment it seemed like he was going to push me away, but it was too late for me to take back the motion; no doubt 'romantic' affection wasn't what he wanted right now. "Sorry, I wasn't thinking-" I started to apologise, but he interrupted me, lightly rubbing the back of my neck.
"Stop it, I love you; you're not him, you can kiss me when you want." As if to prove his point, he brought our lips together again, deepening it and tangling one hand in my hair for a second before pulling back. "But I do really, really want a shower," he admitted.
I reluctantly let him go. There was no way I was comfortable leaving him by himself after the day he'd had, but he seemed to want the alone time. Instead, I just busied myself making dinner; aggressively cutting vegetables would help to disperse some of my anger.
I had the food on the table by the time he came back into the kitchen, but his cheeks were red from rubbing away tears. It was breaking my heart. I just wanted to never let him go again. He came straight to me this time, hugging me tightly and burying his face in my shirt.
"Can you have dinner?" I asked carefully, tracing his spine with my finger tips. It only confirmed to me that he was getting worse.
"N-no...not tonight."
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Nothing seemed the change for the next week, until Friday night. Although he'd been giggly and teasing a few minutes ago, in the time it had taken for me to go to the bathroom, he'd fallen quiet again. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders from behind while he in front of the TV. Focused on his phone, he flipped the screen before I could see it.
I frowned, a little hurt. "What happened?"
He glanced up at me and reached up to pull me down for a kiss. "Nothing, Gar, it's just Caius," he murmured, his lips soft against mine.
I'd never heard the bastard's name before, and my blood was suddenly boiling. "He hounds you when you're not at work?"
Rubbing my arms to remind me not to squeeze him so hard, he nodded reluctantly. "...he texts me sometimes…"
"Show me," I demanded, furious.
"No…"
"Carlisle." I tried to snatch his phone off him.
He shoved it in his pocket and pushed away from me. "No, Garrett."
"Please, Carlisle-"
"So you can do what? Be pissed off the rest of the night?" he counted. "Leave it alone, I don't want to think about it."
"You never want to think about," I grumbled back, flopping onto the couch next to him.
"I have to live with it for forty hours a week; of course I don't want to think about it," he snapped. The hurt in his voice dissolved any resentment I held. "And you hunting down my boss isn't going to fix anything, by the way, so don't even think about it."
Huffing, I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him toward me across the couch. We were both worked up; Edward and Bella's wedding was the next day, and although we'd had a couple of drinks to try and relax, neither of us could manage it.
I was beyond anxious; all I could do was go over and over the whole event in my head. In every scenario, I couldn't figure out how I was going to get out of the sit-down meal after the ceremony, unable to stop thinking about how I was going to vomit and cry in front of a group of people I desperately wanted to accept me. Already, my throat was too tight, and I knew I had to be careful not to take it out on my boyfriend. It wasn't his fault that I was stressed.
Without warning, his hand landed on my chest, gently teasing my sternum. "It'll be fine, Garrett," he murmured softly. "I'm not going to make you sit through the dinner - I don't think I can either - so don't worry about it." He shuffled around to face me, burying his face against my neck.
I slipped my hand under the back of his t-shirt, wanting the feel of his skin against mine. "I just can't wait until we're home again."
"Me neither...I'm so nervous…" he admitted.
"I know, in twenty four hours, it'll all be over."
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The ceremony was going to be inside, but it didn't stop Carlisle from being uncomfortable about the temperature. Under the white dress shirt, he'd managed to hide another, tighter-fitting t-shirt, wanting to maintain some warmth. His suit jacket wouldn't give him any actual shelter, and it was making him anxious.
His fingers brushed my wrists as I stood in front of him and he fastened the buttons on the sleeve cuffs of my shirt. The slightly ill-fitting garment felt better as he tugged the hem of it down, smoothing my collar and fixing my tie. "Ready?" he asked, offering a tight smile. It didn't reach his eyes like it used to, but I leaned down to bring our lips together anyway.
"Yeah…" Not really.
Standing on his toes, he slipped his arms around my neck, kissing me gently. His weight shifted against me as he leaned forward, trying to pull me down a little bit while his hand rested against my cheek, the other teasing the nape of my neck. "It's still okay that we stay with your parents tonight?"
I nodded, digging my fingers into his waist; the temptation of messing up his perfectly-styled hair was killing me, but I didn't dare. Pressing kisses against his neck as he tilted his head back, I knotted my hands in his clothing and pulled him hard against me. "Yes, I spoke with mum this morning." Seeming as the drive out there was so long, we made the decision to stay the night at my parent's place; they were fairly close and it would save us the round trip.
The anxiety didn't leave his face, but he nodded despite it. "Okay, then. Tell me when you've had enough at dinner, and we can bail."
"I'll be fine, Carlisle." It wasn't me that I was worried about at that moment; I could last until dinner before I freaked out, but he looked so exhausted he was dead on his feet. Repressing a sigh, I just linked our fingers together and led him out to the car.
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It had been nearly a month since we'd last seen anyone, and I was hyper aware of Carlisle not wanting to be anywhere near them. He'd even managed to cut Alistair out after a while, and it resulted in his best friend stalking over for a hug the moment he saw us.
"Avoiding me, are you?" he teased, squeezing him. The interaction was a little too rough, and my boyfriend let out a quiet gasp of pain as he was knocked. His hands immediately became more gentle, frowning as Carlisle's face flushed. "What?"
"...nothing, Alistair…" he mumbled, resting his head on his shoulder as he caught his breath. The faint colour in his cheeks wasn't healthy, and he already looked uncomfortable. "I'm fine."
"It's good to see you, but you look like crap, should you even be here?" In a somewhat mothering gesture, he pulled his jacket closer around him.
"They're getting married, Al, it's kind of important," he reminded him.
"I know, but...jesus, Carlisle, you really do look like shit."
"Thanks." He rolled his eyes, grumbling. Stepping back until he was at my side, he glanced up at me. "Should we go in?"
I took his hand, kissing his cheek. "If you're ready."
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We stood as the music began to play, and I instinctively wrapped my arm around Carlisle's waist as he faltered slightly. The last thing we needed was for him to faint during the ceremony. I was trying to figure out how I could get him out quickly if I needed to, but we were in the middle of a row, and there was no way we could push through without making everyone else move.
I was only half aware of the bride in the aisle. She was gorgeous, of course, but I couldn't focus on anything other than the short, panicked breaths my boyfriend was taking. It was a relief to be allowed to sit again, and I placed my hand on his thigh, squeezing genty.
The colour had drained from his face, and he threaded his fingers through mine. "I'm okay," he whispered to me.
I wasn't sure whether I believed him or not, but there wasn't anything I could do about it. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I just wanted to go home. It was making me lightheaded too.
He kissed my cheek and leaned his head against my shoulder as they said their vows, wrapping one of my hands in both of his. "I love you," he murmured.
"I love you too." My pulse started to calm as I leaned my chin against the top of his head. Although I doubted that either of us would ever want a traditional type wedding like this, it was a cute idea to entertain for awhile. It made me a little less claustrophobic.
Someone in front of us shushed us for talking, and it set Carlisle off giggling, trying to hide it by burying his face in my shirt. I bit my lip to smother a smile, letting go of his hand to rub his back.
"You're going to get us in trouble," I teased.
"If they kick us out, we can go home," he teased back. It was only half a joke; we'd both jump at the chance to leave.
"It'll be over soon, Carlisle."
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After a few hours the exhaustion was really starting to wear thin on both of us. People made polite conversation with me, but only after finding that Carlisle was too distracted to respond. He had barely slept the night before, and I knew he was feeling pretty awful. He managed to pull it together enough to wander off when someone called him over, but I was instantly in a panic once he let go of my hand. Not wanting to draw attention to myself, I sat down at a table.
My stomach hurt, I couldn't hear properly, and my whole body was sore from being so tense. Everyone around me seemed too loud, and I found myself unable to repress a grimace as a waiter carried out dishes to put on the table. I frantically glanced around the room for my boyfriend, desperate for him to come back.
When he did return, I took one look at him and knew it was time to go. As much as I wanted to curl up somewhere and have a complete meltdown, Carlisle looked like he was going to hit the ground at any moment.
He looked up at me before I could say anything. "Garrett...I gotta go home…" he mumbled, stumbling into me as I reached for him. Having him in my arms was comforting and made me feel a bit better.
"Yeah, okay, let's go." The panic was still hard to smother, and I was swallowing tears, my hands shaking; there was no way that I was arguing with him.
"Are you okay?" he asked me softly, threading his fingers through mine. "You don't look good, Gar?"
"Y-yeah...I just want to go home too," I told him. Squeezing his hand, I suddenly didn't care if anyone thought we were weird.
He nodded, wandering over to Edward and Bella to say goodbye. They hugged us both and didn't seem upset at all, but I still felt like shit for leaving. It looked like Carlisle did too. He grabbed Alistair's hand on the way out, pulling him toward the door with us. "Al...We're going home," he told him apologetically.
He looked backwards and forwards between us, then sighed heavily and ran his hand through his hair. "Please tell me you're not traveling all the way back to the city tonight?"
My arm found it's way around Carlisle. "No, we're going back to my parent's place; it's only half an hour or so."
Alistair still didn't look comforted. "Both of you are a mess; who's driving?"
We glanced at each other; we hadn't decided that yet. I jumped in before Carlisle could. "I am." Seeing his frown - worry more than annoyance - I nudged him a little, forcing a smile. "I don't want you passing out behind the wheel," I tried to tease, soothing any sting. Thankfully, he just smiled tiredly and leaned into me.
"Jesus," Alistair grumbled. "One of you text me when you get there, so I know that I don't have to call search and rescue to pull you out of a ditch." He shrugged apologetically when Randal called out to him, squeezing my shoulder and briefly hugging Carlisle as he went back to him.
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By the time we got in the car, Carlisle was shivering quite a bit and clearly freezing. I flicked on the heaters, subtly pointing them at him while he wasn't looking. "You okay?" I asked, rubbing his leg. He felt cold through through the fabric and I knew I needed to get him in bed.
Nodding but unconvincing, he tried to smile. "Yeah…"
"Do you want my jacket?" I frowned, already starting to pull it off. I would overheat soon anyway, and I'd rather he was comfortable.
"You'll freeze, Garrett…" he pleaded as he started to fidget.
"No I won't; I've got more meat on me than you do." My attempt at teasing was half-hearted; both of us were feeling like crap. I ignored his protest, wrapping it around him anyway. At least it was heading into summer; I hoped the change in weather might make him more comfortable, even if the rest of the country was sweating.
Driving in the dark was making him carsick. We weren't that far from my parent's place, but he was getting paler and paler, having unconsciously wrapped his arms around his stomach. I was watching him carefully, but it wasn't instilling my confidence in him at all.
"You okay?" I asked cautiously.
"...sick…" he mumbled, almost unwilling to open his mouth to speak to me.
"Are you going to make it to mum and dad's?" It was only a few more minutes, although I didn't think that made difference to him at that point.
He nodded. Swallowing hard, he glanced over at me, almost desperately. "How much longer, though?"
"About ten minutes. Do you want me to stop?"
"...um…"
"I can pull over, Carlisle, I just don't want you to throw up."
Watching his lap, he shifted uncomfortably and bit his lip. "...I'm okay, I'll just wait…"
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We must have looked like quite a state pulling up outside of my parents; Carlisle, dizzy and pale, and me, frustrated and worried. I held him closely against my side as I knocked on the door, and he leaned into me. Despite the jacket, he was freezing.
The longer the door stayed closed, the more anxious he was becoming. "Are you sure-" he started, almost in tears and shivering violently.
He was interrupted by the door swinging open, mum smiling at us. "Come in, you two." Her smile started to fade as she led us into the kitchen, and she turned to look at me. "Have either of you eaten? Do you need dinner?"
Unable to deny that I was hungry, I guiltily agreed to eat. I glanced at Carlisle, but he just looked ill.
Mum didn't need to be told, warming up a plateful of food to me, and ushering us to sit down. She gave Carlisle a glass of juice, unable to leave him with nothing, briefly touching his shoulder. "You okay, love?"
"Yes, thanks, Sasha," he told her with a forced smile.
"It's been a long day," I explained, my hand on his leg under the table.
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He really wasn't comfortable being at my parent's house for this long. Glancing at the clock every couple of seconds, the darkness outside was making him nervous. There wasn't much I could do to ease the tension and it was made even worse by my father sitting in the room with us. I was praying simultaneously that Carlisle wouldn't have a panic attack, and that dad wouldn't trigger him.
My father was watching us, frowning though it wasn't in disapproval. He eventually couldn't stand the silence anymore. "Have you ever been camping before, Carlisle?"
I repressed a groan; this wasn't a topic of conversation that was going to end well for either of them.
Looking a little startled that he was being spoken to in the first place, it took him a few seconds to respond. "...no, not really...?"
"Come with us in the summer; we go to a nice spot next to lake - hiking and fishing all day. You won't have seen much of the US countryside?"
Again, he just shook his head, too shy to look up and just wanting to go to bed. That was the end of their conversation, and silence filled the room again. Mum laughed as she came in, rolling her eyes at how awkward we were being. She turned the TV on to put us out of our misery.
I couldn't have cared less about making my father uncomfortable; I couldn't keep my hands off Carlisle any longer. We were both beyond fragile by that point, and the second I reached for him, he shuffled over to be against me. I fidgeted with his shirt while he fitted himself against my side, his head on my shoulder and his arms around my middle. He didn't seem to care about dad's reaction either.
"With how tired you two look, anyone would think it was your wedding," dad commented during an ad break in the show.
"Feels like it," I grumbled, stifling a yawn as Carlisle offered him a weak smile. I reached over, rubbing his leg and taking his hand, but I could see that he'd had enough. I awkwardly cleared my throat. "It's been kind of a long day, dad; I think we'd better go to bed." When I glanced at Carlisle for confirmation that that was what he wanted, he offered me an apologetic smile. I stood up as my father bade us goodnight, pulling him to his feet.
By the time we got to the top of the staircase, I was well aware of how cold my boyfriend still was. His hand was trembling in mine, and his fingers were freezing.
"Do you want to shower? It might warm you up," I suggested, stopping outside of the bedroom door to face him. As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I realised my mistake; he was far too nervous to want to do that.
He hesitated, silently debating it for a few seconds. "...Can you come with me?" he asked hesitantly.
My initial reaction was to jump at the chance, but I was suddenly very aware of our proximity to my parents. I couldn't refuse him though. "Yeah, okay. Come on." Mum had left towels out for us already, so I grabbed them off the bed and took him into the bathroom. I locked the door behind us while he turned on the water, but we were both glad to be out of the uncomfortable formal clothing.
I hugged him once we were under the water, loving having him in my arms but hating how fragile he felt. "Are you okay?" I asked carefully.
Nodding, he leaned up to kiss me. "I will be once we're in bed." The statement was entirely innocent; he was far too tired for anything else.
We stayed in the shower until he couldn't stand up any longer, and I could feel faint warmth under his skin. I wrapped a towel around his shoulders as we got out, placing a soft kiss on his lips. The few minutes that it took for us to get dry and back into the spare bedroom felt like an eternity while he was looking so unstable.
"This was your bedroom when you were a child?" he asked as we got dressed.
"Yeah; they took the old furniture out years ago, but the curtains and the wall paper are still the same. I spent way too many hours playing video games up here." I sat on the edge of the bed, catching his hand and pulling him toward me, holding his waist once he was close enough.
He ran his fingers through my hair, leaning down to kiss me and falling forwards as I lay backwards. "Your parents have lived here a long time, then?"
I nodded, unable to resist a smile. "They moved here when Eleazar and I were little kids. I guess they don't want to let the place go...I never thought it would be boys that I was sneaking up here to make out with, though," I teased him.
Laughing, he rolled his eyes. "We're hardly sneaking; your parents let me in your front door." This time, the kiss was a little harder, lasting longer, and his fingers teased the back of my neck. He let go and crawled under the blankets as I pulled them back, settling uncomfortably beside me.
"Try and relax, Carlisle," I pleaded, squeezing him against me. "It'll be okay; we can go home in the morning."
