We spent the next few evening scouring the internet for vacant apartments, rushing off to viewings whenever we could and still finding nothing suitable. I was quickly losing my new-found hope to be able to move, starting to suspect that we'd be stuck where we were for at least another year. Carlisle refused to lose faith in the whole thing, constantly reassuring me that it would be okay and that it would all work out. I was trying really hard to believe him. He'd gone as far as to pack most of our belongings into boxes before he had to go back to work, and my heart ached when I thought about having to undo it all.

.

.

I knew Riley was irritated with me. We were supposed to be having lunch together, but I was struggling not to tune him out and my responses were half-ass. Carlisle had sent me a few photos from an ad in the paper, wanting to know if I would go with him to see another place tonight. Part of me wanted to blow him off, but the rest of me knew I shouldn't.

My coworker got annoyed and stole my phone from my hands before I could text him back, grumbling. "You're not even listening, Garrett." He typed something out quickly, presumably sending it before I could stop him.

"I know, I'm sorry," I sighed, trying to smile as he passed me my phone back. "I'm just-"

"'Worried about moving',' he said in what must have been intended to be my voice. "I know; just go with Carlisle and see the place, and then stop thinking about it. You've done hardly anything today, and you're going to get yelled at if you carry on like this," he pointed out.

He was right, of course, and I nodded slowly in agreement; there wasn't much else I could do. "Sorry, Riley. When is your mother-in-law leaving?" I asked, remembering his last complaint. I hoped it would get him talking just so I wouldn't have to, and sure enough, it set him off on a rant immediately. As horrible as it was, I was partly glad I'd never have that experience with Carlisle.

Once time was up, we paid for our drinks and headed back to the office. I really didn't get much done for the rest of the day, but by some miracle my boss didn't tear me to shreds over it. Carlisle agreed to meet me outside of work so we could go straight to the apartment, and I was in a bad mood before I even got to him. Still, any hard feelings about all of it dissolved a little once I saw him. It wasn't quite so bad once I could hold his hand.

He still noticed, though. "What's up? You're very quiet." The light pressure he put on my fingers let me know I wasn't going to get away with sulking.

"I'm just tired, Carlisle; I want this to be over," I told him. A movie and bed sounded like the best plan, but I wasn't getting anywhere near it tonight.

"If it's awful, we don't have to stay," he reminded me softly. "Do you want me to drive?"

I knew he really didn't want to, but I handed him the keys anyway; it would make things a little easier - he knew the address, and I didn't have a clue. We made our way there in near silence, except for the radio playing quietly in the background, and I watched as the streets slowly became less dirty, the houses slightly further apart and the yards properly fenced. Where we lived at the moment certainly wasn't the worst, but this was far more appealing. Perhaps looking wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.

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.

The place was slightly smaller than it looked in the pictures. And a little more expensive than either of us had planned on. But it was perfect. Just from standing in the kitchen, I could easily see us living here. It wasn't cold like the other places, having insulation in the walls, and it had a balcony despite being seven levels up. It overlooked the cleaner parts of the city, and the neighbourhood was far nicer than the one we were currently in. We'd have an actual car park instead of roadside parking, and it was a lot closer to both of our jobs. I glanced at Carlisle, trying to gauge his feelings about it before I said anything; I didn't want to pressure him into anything, considering the extra cost.

He took my hand as the real estate agent led us down the hallway. The main bedroom would get the morning sun each day. There was gas plumbing, meaning we'd get endless hot water so long as we paid the bill. And, best of all, pets were allowed. Carlisle gently squeezed my fingers, turning to look at me as we were briefly left alone in a room. "I really like this place," he admitted, almost shyly. I guess that he felt the same about as I did about talking about it.

"Me too," I murmured. My hands found his waist, tugging him closer so that I could hug him. "I like it a lot."

"And it would be okay to have Fox."

"We could put our name on the list?" I suggested softly. Theoretically, it wasn't committing to anything; the landlord could deny us and choose more suitable tenants. The thought of getting this place still made my heart race, though.

He nodded with a small smile. "Yes." Leaning into me for a second, he pressed a kiss against my neck.

.

.

Unfortunately, the only activity Randal and Alistair could agree on was lunch. I wasn't about to be mean enough to put Al through the argument to get his partner to give in to a movie, so I'd just have to grin and bare it. It wouldn't be so bad seeming as Carlisle would be there the whole time. They'd picked a cute little restaurant in town - most likely with my boyfriend's persuasion seeming as I doubted they would normally have chosen somewhere so quiet.

Hostility wasn't something I'd expected though. The air was tight as we met each other and Alistair was frowning, tightly squeezing Randal's wrist as his boyfriend glared daggers at mine. Carlisle just looked confused, attempting to smile at both of them and stepping forward to hug his friend. Randal's hand shot between them and shoved him back into me. "Don't," he snapped.

Alistair hissed something under his breath at him, offering Carlisle a sorry smile and allowing the affection despite the cloud of disapproval standing behind him. "I missed you," he told him softly.

"You only saw him a few days ago," Randal grumbled.

"Well he's nicer to me than you are," he retorted, still holding Carlisle's wrist and refusing to drop it. "Can we just order lunch without an argument, please?" Offering us a sorry smile, he led us inside, leaving me with Randal while he and Carlisle idly chattered about us moving soon. I didn't even attempt to speak to Randal, not after what he'd told Eleazar. He could sit alone in silence for the rest of the day for all I cared.

We ordered our meals and Carlisle guided us to sit in the quietest corner of the place, seating himself close next to me and holding my hand under the table. Despite the foul taste Randal was putting in everyone's mouth, the food was going down surprisingly easily. Every time I hesitated Carlisle's hand would tighten around mine in reassurance, keeping me from freaking out every time I got panicky. It wasn't me that lost my cool in the end.

"For god's sake, can you just be nice to him?" Alistair scolded as Randal made yet another snide comment. Obviously pissed now, he banged his fist against the table, causing a loud bang and making his partner jump. "If all you're going to do is sulk, you should have just stayed home."

"I'm not sulking, I just don't want to be around someone who's clearly trying to get between us," he grumbled back.

He rolled his eyes. "Don't be pathetic; he's never done anything to you."

"If he was fucking his boss, what's stopping him from trying to get to you-"

Annoyed with the accusation, Carlisle finally lashed out. "If Alistair and I were going to be together, it would have happened long before you two ever met," he snapped.

"Garrett's brother doesn't like you either-" he started, only to be abruptly cut off.

"Eleazar doesn't like me because you lied to him," he defended, trying to keep him voice low. I'd never seen him get so fired up over anything - he wasn't quick tempered normally - but this was obviously hitting a few raw nerves.

"I'm not the liar here, Carlisle," he spat at him. His hand whipped out, hitting him hard across the face and balling his hands into fists. "I wasn't the one fucking my boss." His voice was too loud, echoing around the room.

A wave of awkwardness washed over us. The restaurant had fallen silent, everyone staring at us as Carlisle's cheek stung and Randal loomed over him, Alistair and I looked at each other wide eyed. A tense minute passed while Carlisle just watched the table top to avoid everyone else. Oddly enough, he just started eating again, forcing the food down his throat and ignoring the three of us.

The violence shocked me so much that I couldn't respond. I just copied my boyfriend and tried to make myself swallow. Alistair did too. No one spoke, we didn't look at each other, and the rest of the restaurant slowly went back to their previous activities. Carlisle finished his meal first and stood up, taking his plate to the bench and talking to the cashier for a moment. He ran his card through the machine and then walked straight to the front door.

Freaked out, Alistair started to get up, only to be tugged back into his seat by Randal. "Carlisle-" he started, not getting the words out before he was gone. "Go and get him," he pleaded with me, tearing his boyfriend's hands off of his wrist.

It was enough to snap me back into reality and I jumped up. Handing him the payment for my meal, I forced myself not to run to the door. It didn't take too long for me to find him; he'd only made it to an alley a few shops away before being too shaky to go further. Surprisingly, he looked fairly calm, just a bit pale aside from the welt on his cheek.

Without saying anything, I just wrapped my arms around him and pulled him to my chest. "Are you okay?"

He nodded slowly. "I need to go home."

"Okay, Carlisle." I kept hold of his hand as we walked back toward our apartment building, not wanting him to do anything irrational while he was upset. Our walk back was quiet, and I expected Carlisle to retreat straight to bed once we got in the front door. He didn't, though. Instead he set about packing up what little still wasn't in boxes, working around me as I watched in confusion. "You sure you're alright?" When he didn't respond, I grabbed his hand the next time he passed me, holding my free one against his cheek. "Carlisle?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, Gar, I'm just pissed he hit me. It was kind of rude." He tried to pull away, but my arm snaked around his waist to hold him in place. 'Rude' didn't begin to cover it. He must have seen the expression on my face, because he continued after a minute. "I've had far worse than a slap in the last few months, if doesn't matter, Garrett."

I nodded, brushing my lips against his before kissing him gently. "Let's get this house packed up then, yeah?" Tomorrow was Carlisle's first day back at work, and having everything all ready to go would mean one less thing to stress about when the time came. And it meant we could get to bed early if we were fast enough.

.

.

The dark room was dimly lit when I opened my eyes. it was still the middle of the night, and it took me a moment to realise that glow was coming from my boyfriend's phone. "Carlisle? You okay?" I mumbled, reaching for his waist to pull him back into me; he'd rolled away from me and sat up, presumably to try and keep from waking me up.

He nodded, and lay down to snuggle into my side. "Yeah, I just can't sleep," he admitted. Still, he held his phone against his chest to block my view of it. There was something 'off' about his tone, and he couldn't hide it from me, despite me being half asleep.

"What's up?" I rubbed his hand, encouraging him to show me. His reluctance was quite obvious now. "Are you alright? What happened?"

Shifting to rest his head on my shoulder, he finally moved the screen to where I could see it. The website opened was some form of social media. Neither one of us used facebook or anything similar, so it only confused me. He flicked the screen across and pulled up a few pictures off a young family; two smiling parents and a grinning toddler. "This is Esme and her husband Charles," he told me quietly, hesitant like he was expecting to be told off for it. "I know it's weird to look, Garrett, I was just thinking about home, and…"

It stung a little hearing London referred to as 'home'. "It's not weird, Carlisle," I murmured, pressing a kiss against his cheek. I slipped my arm around him, my fingertips teasing his ribs. "You grew up there; of course you're curious."

He said nothing, closing Esme's profile and opening another, this time from a stern looking man. "This is one of my brothers...His name is felix," he told me.

That freaked me out a little bit. "Why are you looking at this?"

"...I still get really homesick sometimes…" he told me hesitantly. Slowly tracing the lines of my chest on top on my shirt, he tried in vain to stop his cheeks warming. It didn't help and he buried his face in the fabric. "Being with your family all weekend made me think about mine, and we were talking about Esme, and I guess I got stuck on the thought of them, and…" He trailed off, guilty, and just hugged me tightly. "Sorry I woke you up."

"It's alright." We didn't speak for a while, but Carlisle's gentle fidgeting was enough for me to know he wasn't about to fall asleep any time soon. I wanted to keep him talking, now that he was finally opening up to me. "How long were you with her? Esme, I mean?" I asked carefully, squeezing him back when he squeezed me.

"Only for a few months before I came out. We went to the same high school, and her parents used to pay me - or rather my father - to tutor her in the subjects we shared. God, it's so strange that she's a mother now. Good strange, but strange all the same," he rambled.

"Her son is cute," I murmured. "What's his name?"

"I don't know; we don't speak," he reminded me. "...You really want kids though, don't you, Gar?" His voice was soft and careful.

It was only fair for me to tell him the truth seeming as he was finally talking to me; I didn't want him to avoid all this again just because I shut him down. "Yeah, I do. Carmen being pregnant again really rubs it in, I guess. Believing I was straight for 26 never really highlighted it as a problem, because I always thought I could have that, but now thinking about it makes me feel weird." There really wasn't another way to put it; it made my insides squirm and left me conflicted every time it came up. "You said you didn't want to be a father?"

He paused, and then shook his head. "No; I don't want to be like my dad."

A knot formed in the pit of my stomach and I pushed him off me, rolling him onto his back and pinning his hands above his head, pressing a kiss against his throat as I leaned over him. "You'll never, ever be like him; don't think like that."

The bedroom door creaked open as Fox nudged her way in, hearing our voices and coming to find us. She cried from the floor until Carlisle called to her, and then leapt up onto the bed. Her tiny body squeezed between us as she wedged herself underneath my body and the bed sheet, determined to be close to Carlisle. "I think the packing is upsetting her," he murmured, pulling his hands free to stroke her while she purred.

"She's a cat," I laughed. "It doesn't mean anything to her."

"You can't know that," he teased. Quiet for a while, he rolled onto his side to face me, one hand still comforting the kitten while the other rested on my waist. "Did you have pets when you were a kid?"

I tucked the blankets closer around us and hugged him again. "Mum and dad had a dog, and they let me have a couple of fish; they thought I didn't have the attention span to look after a bird or anything and fish seemed like an easy option. What about you?"

"I used to feed the neighbour's cat sometimes, but my father never let me have pets," he told me. "...It makes Fox really special."

Smiling to myself, I leaned back into the pillows, wrapping my arms around the two of them. "She'd be special anyway." I'd never stop loving the way she ran to him, and the way he lit up whenever he held her. "Are you nervous about work tomorrow?" I asked softly, giving him a gentle squeeze. Family might be a distraction, but I was fairly sure that was why he was awake at this hour.

He nodded. "I'm scared I'm going to freak out as soon as I get in the door, Gar, I don't think I can do it…"

"Yes you can. If you have a really horrible time, call me and I'll bring you home," I promised, kissing him again. Reaching over him, I stole his phone from where he'd dropped it. I shifted the blankets back a bit to expose the cat, quickly taking a picture of the three of us together. "Just think about Fox if you get anxious, yeah?" I showed him the photo, hoping that he found the gesture cute rather than invasive.

Thankfully, he started to smile again as he took his phone back. "I love you; I can't wait until we get to move into our new place."

"I love you too, and don't go getting too far ahead of yourself," I reminded him.