A particularly long chapter for your viewing pleasure. Thank you for your kind reviews and for sticking around with my inconsistency this long. :)
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Finding that Carlisle wasn't in bed with me when I woke up in the middle of the night freaked me out a bit. I found him on the couch, completely absorbed in his laptop. A glance down at his screen showed an array of design software open, and guilt immediately started to creep in. I sat down next to him, risking putting my hand on his leg and he looked over at me. "Is this because you had to come and get me the other day?" I asked quietly. "Or are you mad at me?"
He squeezed my fingers. "Neither; I don't want to spend all weekend trying to finish this when I could be spending that time with you."
"Have you had any sleep, though?" I frowned. My gaze landed on an empty mug, and he followed my line of sight.
"Not really, I got up again just after you fell asleep, but I've had three cups of coffee so I'm good." He carefully balanced his laptop on the arm of the couch, leaning over to kiss me. "You should be in bed, though. Especially after the day you had."
I was still rather tired, but I didn't tell him that. "I'd rather you came with me."
"I'll come in soon, after the caffeine wears off," he told me.
"You promise?" I grumbled, not liking the thought of him sleeping depriving himself just so he could sit with me while I moped all weekend. Trying to satisfy a need for intimacy, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly.
"I promise, Gar. Go to bed." He was already reaching for the laptop again as I pulled back, and my hopes that he would come with me now were quickly dashed. I tried to kid myself that it was better this way, seeming as his caffeinated fidgeting would drive me insane, but I couldn't be entirely convinced.
"Don't stay up too late." I brought our lips together again as I stood, the kiss lingering for longer than normal, but not as long as I would have liked.
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I was jolted awake again by someone knocking on the front door. My heart leaped into my throat despite it being 8am on a Saturday morning, and I threw myself out of bed to rush into the kitchen before Carlisle could open the door alone - whoever was awake this early had to be a crazy person, and my boyfriend still wasn't in bed with me. The sheets had wrapped around my legs, hampering my ability to move, and I got to the door just in time to see him hug Edward. As much as I liked Edward, I was confused as to why he was here so early.
Carlisle smiled when he saw me, and I went over to them once my cover was blown. "Edward and Bella are going to baby-sit Fox for us while we're away this weekend," he told me, his arm creeping around my waist once I was close enough. For lack of a better term, he looked like shit - far too tired and running on adrenaline.
"Bella thinks this is the first step in convincing me to get a kitten," Edward laughed before I could comprehend what I'd just been told. "It's pretty cute, but I don't like the chances."
"She, and her name is Fox," Carlisle told him, only half kidding. It earned him a snort and an eyeroll. His smile disappeared after a second. "Are you going to be there when we help Alistair move?"
I hadn't been aware that we had a date for that yet, and I was automatically rubbing the small of my boyfriend's back; as brave as he was trying to be, it was still hurting. That was a conversation for another time, though.
Edward nodded. "Yeah, the more of us there, the better while Randal is around." He leaned down to pick up the cat carrier from the floor, where Fox was already whining and pawing to get out, and forced a smile. "I better get this one home then, you two enjoy your weekend."
I waited until Carlisle had closed and locked the door before I jumped him. "We're going away this weekend?" I asked, feigning annoyance as he slowly turned to face me.
His face flushed a bit as he tried to gauge whether I was actually upset. "You said that you wanted to go back to the beach again, and I looked up the place we stayed last time online and they had a few vacancies, so…" There was a pause where I was shocked into silence, and then he started back-tracking. "I can cancel it if you don't want to go, I just thought that it might make you feel better about everything that's happening if we could get away for a few days."
"I want to," I assured him. "God, I love you." The warmth of his arms surrounded me suddenly, and I kissed the side of his face as I pulled him closer. "We're going today?"
"Yeah, we can stay until monday morning," he said softly.
"Isn't that going to mess up work for you?" I frowned. It took a moment for me to realise that although we were going away, he was probably going to have to work the whole time after I stole so much of his attention over the last week.
"No, I finished it last night; that's why I stayed up. I'll have a little bit to catch up on when we get back, but it'll be okay." He was leaning against me, obviously tired, and I felt a bit bad that he'd done this all for me.
"I'll drive, though, alright? I don't want you to fall asleep behind the wheel. Did you sleep at all last night?" I found myself running my hands over him, a little overprotective and wanting to comfort him.
He shook his head. "I was going to, but it was already 5am and I thought I may as well just stay up until Edward came; Fox was crying anyway."
"You shouldn't be doing that to yourself. Do you want to nap for a couple of hours before we go, then?" I suggested. Mostly, I just didn't want to be the one responsible for making him feel crappy the whole weekend, especially while he was the one of us that was still having to go to work.
"No, I'll be fine. We need to pack, anyway." Lacing our hands together, he started to pull me down the hallway. "The sooner we get going the better."
I sighed and pinned my hopes on him sleeping in the car.
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We hurriedly packed what we needed for a couple of days and threw it all in the car. My stomach was growling by that point - it was nearing 10 o'clock, and I was starving. I waited until Carlisle had settled in the car beside me before bringing it up. "Do you want to stop for breakfast somewhere?" I asked him, reached over to rub his leg. I switched on the car to get the heaters going, trying to force the thought of unemployment out of my head.
"Yeah, I need coffee," he agreed, leaning over to kiss my cheek as he did up his seatbelt. "You going to be okay eating in the car?"
"I think so. If I can't, I'll just wait until we get there." Logically, I knew we should be saving money, not going away and eating out, but we never did it normally and getting out of town after the last week sounded like heaven to me. "How'd you find somewhere so quickly? You booked it last night, right?"
He shrugged, reaching for my free hand and knotting our fingers together. "You were upset, and I couldn't sleep, and their website had vacancies on it when I looked - I guess people don't want to go to the coast when it's this cold?"
"No one except us, huh?"
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It was lunchtime by the time we arrived at the hotel, but my relief to be out of town and away from everything wasn't hampered by the long drive. Somehow, Carlisle had managed to stay awake with me the whole time, and I felt less like I wanted to rip my hair out now.
The woman at reception rummaged behind the desk to find our key, producing it with a smile. "Oh, your room has been upgraded; the bathroom in the one you originally booked is actually being renovated." She handed it to me as Carlisle signed for the room, wishing us goodnight as we thanked her.
I wrapped my arm around my boyfriend's waist as we waited for the elevator, biting back a smile as he leaned his head on my shoulder. "Are you tired yet?" Squeezing him, my forearm brushing against his side as his shirt shifted. The elevator dinged and the doors opened in front of us, forcing my attention away from Carlisle. He only stumbled into me for another hug anyway.
"Yeah, sorry," he mumbled. His fingertips edged under my shirt, teasing the small of my back while we waited to get to the right floor. The room was far higher up in the building than the one we had stayed in last time, and I was hopeful we'd get some kind of view while we were this far up. Being sleep deprived, I didn't think that my boyfriend cared all that much at the moment, but a nice room wasn't about to go over my head. "I need more caffeine, or I'm going to fall asleep."
"I think you need to fall asleep," I laughed. "We're here two nights; we have all day tomorrow, you can sleep." The doors opened again and I pressed a quick kiss against his cheek.
He wandered ahead of me until he found our room, shoving the key into the right door. I hung back a little, unable to tear my eyes off of his perfect figure. It was still beyond me how we ended up together in the first place. "Are you coming, Gar?" he asked, glancing back at me when the distance between us got a little too noticeable.
I grinned at him, hurrying forward to nudge him through the threshold of the room. The view was just as amazing as I'd hoped; the main window looked out over the town, and we were close enough to the water to get a good view of the beach as well. Sun was streaming through the glass onto the bed, and Carlisle immediately fell onto the mattress to let it wash over him, soaking in the warmth of the room. "Is the bed comfy?" I teased, fairly certain he was about to pass out for the afternoon. He hummed in acknowledgement, folding his arms over his face. The bed dipped slightly under my weight as I sat next to him, my hand landing on his hip. "How about you get in bed?"
Squinting through the bright light, he looked up at me. "Do you wanna watch a movie instead?" His hand found mine again, and he pulled my arm out from under me, forcing me to fall next to him.
I kissed his cheek. "Yeah, okay. Give me a minute." Telling him to pick something and tossing him the remote, I headed into the bathroom. It wasn't until I was washing my hands that I thought to glance around the room - not only was it spotlessly clean, we also had a wonderful looking spa bath, which I sure as hell was going to make use of later.
Some random show was on the TV when I wandered back into the bedroom, and I shrugged out of my jacket before climbing between the sheets beside Carlisle. "We have a bath," I told him, sliding my arms around his waist. I pulled him closer, sinking into the pillows as he moulded himself around my body. I shouldn't have bothered asking him what he wanted to watch - he was asleep before the opening credits finished. Letting my fingers creep under the edge of his shirt, I slowly ran my hand up and down his spine. I loved him so fucking much.
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We stayed in bed most of the afternoon, Carlisle drifting in and out of sleep as the loud parts of the movie disturbed him, while I half watched and half played with my phone. I was getting a little bored, but moving was unappealing while I was so comfortable, and I found myself clicking through various ads that popped up in my internet browser. Most of them were for cheap crap or food, but it was mildly entertaining. Continuing down the page, I was confronted with a ridiculously over the top jewelry ad, pushing an engagement ring worth more than my life, and I barely resisted rolling my eyes as I scrolled past it; thank god proposing to a guy was not going to be that complicated.
I didn't think.
I'd never really thought it through, honestly.
I went back to the ad and opened it. The site was quite obviously targeted at women, with it's fancy packaging and obnoxious stones. I couldn't tell the difference between silver and white gold, and the rose gold just seemed like tarnished metal to me - thank god I didn't have a girlfriend. Out of curiosity, I opened the men's section, partly relieved that it was barely a page long and not even a fraction of the mess I was looking at before. Nothing looked like it would fit on my boyfriend's hand though. Apparently the shop's idea of 'masculin' meant wide and chunky, far too obtrusive for his delicate fingers.
A loud crash came through the speakers and made Carlisle shifted slightly, his hand brushing across my body to rest on my thigh. Glancing down at him, I gently rubbed his shoulder, trying to keep him semi-conscious as I quickly shut down the page before he caught me. "Do you ever want to get married?" I asked carefully.
It took him a moment to respond, the question a little too random while he was tired. "Get married to you, or married in general?" he mumbled back.
"Is there a difference?" I frowned.
"Well, to you I do, yeah, but otherwise no I don't." Being so tired had obviously obliterated his verbal filter and I chuckled, reaching up to weave my fingers through his hair.
"I'm being serious, Carlisle," I laughed.
"So am I; I want to marry you, but if that doesn't happen for us, then I don't want to be married at all."
"No pressure, then," I teased.
He risked a glance up at me. "I'm not saying you have to, Garrett - obviously - but I do like the idea of us together like that one day." It took less than a minute for him to settle again as soon as we stopped talking.
I relaxed into the mattress again, dropping my phone onto the bed beside me. I was kind of tired now too, with Carlisle cuddled into me. He pulled at my clothing a little, wanting me to shuffle down a bit more. I did what he wanted, my hands all over him under the blankets as he tangled his arms around my waist, his head in the crook of my neck. My shirt had moved and bunched up, and though it would have been horribly uncomfortable normally, the feeling of his skin against mine stopped me from fixing it. I just pulled the bed covers closer around us and let myself fall asleep.
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It was dusk the next time I opened my eyes, the sunset streaming in through the curtains we'd forgotten to close. Dinner sounded like a good idea, and I needed to get Carlisle's weight off my arm to get the sensation back in my fingers. I shifted slightly, trying to free myself, and he pressed a sleepy kiss against my throat. "What's the time?" he asked softly.
"Time for food." Kicking my legs free of the sheets, I sat up, forcing him to let me go. "Do you wanna go to the grocery store, or grab some take out?"
He rolled onto his back and rubbed his face as he tried to wake up, slowly sitting up. "Both of those options sound like I have to get dressed again," he groaned.
I chuckled, pulling his legs over my lap. "We could order pizza, and I can answer the door."
"I knew loved you for a reason," he teased, locking our fingers together. "Sorry, I didn't mean to sleep for that long. I didn't mean to sleep at all, really."
"Carlisle, you literally stayed awake all night, you need to sleep." Trying not to laugh at much effort it was taking for him to stay awake, I pulled the duvet free of the bed, tightly wrapping it around him as he started to get up. "And staying in tonight sounds great, actually. What are the chances that I can get you in that bath with me later?"
That woke him up. "Isn't that weird?"
"We shower together all the time," I pointed out. "And it's a spa bath in a room rented to couples; it's what they expect to happen." I trailed my fingernails up his arm, grinning when it made him shudder.
The blood rushed to his face, and he was suddenly out of my reach. "Still kind of weird. You know, maybe we should go out; we need to get snacks anyway, and it's going to be too late if we wait much longer."
"Fine, let's go for a walk then." Not really deterred by his defensiveness, I got myself off the bed, tossing his jacket at him. Everything was close in this town and there was no reason for us to waste gas driving around when we could just walk. Besides, the weather was nice - albeit a little cold - and I hoped the fresh air might help clear my head after the last week.
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We ordered pizza and ducked into the supermarket next door to grab some food for later. The sky was starting to cloud over, and it was a bit too cold to be standing outside without moving around. Carlisle held my hand as we wandered around the store together, his arms around my waist whenever we stopped to look at something. I knew crowds of people still made him nervous, and part of me suspected that was what was causing his need to be close to me.
By the time we got back to where we were staying, we were rather damp from the light rain that had set in. We had a couple of glasses of wine with dinner, and were a little more than tipsy by the time we were done. It didn't take all that long for us to end up back in bed together.
His lips fit so perfectly against mine I had trouble believing that we were ever apart. His hands were soft in my hair, only tugging as I dragged my fingernails down his back, my mouth trailing down his throat as he tilted his head back. My teeth scraped against his skin and he hummed softly, rubbing the back of my neck. I couldn't tell if his face was flushed from the alcohol or from having my hands on him, but I didn't care. "I think you need to take this off; you're obviously too warm," I teased, pushing his shirt up to his shoulders.
Laughing, he quickly pulled it over his head, tossing it onto the floor. "Happy?"
"Almost." I pulled at his belt, managing to undo the buckle while his giggling got in the way of him stopping me. "I think you need to take these off too."
"You know, I'm glad we closed the curtains on the way in." Kneeling over me, he let me push his jeans down his thighs, his fingers slipping the buttons on my shirt undone. Suddenly his lips were against my bare chest, kissing and teasing as he fumbled with the button on my pants.
"Come here, you." I shoved him off me and onto his back, straddling his hips as I leaned over him. I fought the rest of his clothing off him and pinned his hands above his head. "Do you still think it's weird to get in the bath with me?" Letting his hands go, I ran my fingertips down his body, kissing the line where his underwear met his waist.
His fingers were back in my hair, pulling rather hard this time. "Uh...maybe not?"
"Good." I grabbed both of his hands and got up, dragging him into the bathroom with me. Despite agreeing, he still looked rather nervous, fidgeting awkwardly in the doorway as he watched me run the water. I finally got rid of my shirt, hanging it next to the towels and turning to face him. "This is really freaking you out, huh?" I crossed over to him, hugging him carefully.
He nodded, burying his face in my shoulder and standing on his toes to wrap his arms around my neck. "Yeah, a little bit."
"If it's as awful as you think it is, you can get out," I promised. Either way, the thought of warm water was entirely too appealing for me to resist.
"Okay," he agreed quietly.
"Okay?" Trying to suppress my smile, I checked the water again, turning off the taps and stripping off the rest of my clothes. "Come on, then." I'd forgotten how good being entirely submerged in hot water was, and sank in up to my neck, waiting for Carlisle to do anything other than stand there and stare at me. "What's the matter? Have you never had a bath before?" I held out my hand to him. "We shower together all the time, Carlisle."
I watched him as he finished undressing, quite pleased with myself. He was even less pleased under my scrutiny. I forced myself to be patient and not grab him as he carefully got in the water, not wanting him to slip and hurt himself. "If you hate it, you don't have to stay," I reminded him, holding his waist and pulling him into me as he leaned back. His shoulders were still above the water, and I was kissing any exposed skin I could. "I love you; you're so good to me."
"I love you too." His fingers were covered in bubbles as he brushed his knuckles against my jaw, and suddenly his lips were on mine. The kiss was a little urgent, whatever vulnerability he was feeling from the position we were in replaced with a need for intimacy. He buried his face in my neck when I pulled away to catch my breath, raking his fingers through my hair.
"Not so bad, hmm?" I asked. I slipped on my legs between his, settling him on top of me. Our hips aligned perfectly, and I strangled a moan in my throat at the sensation. He relaxed enough to start to respond to me touching him, the kisses turning into bites that I was sure would bruise tomorrow. His hand was suddenly wrapped around my cock, and I involuntarily threw my head back to hard that I saw stars when it hit the side of the bath. "Jesus."
"Don't knock yourself out," he warned, somehow out of breath.
"You're asking for trouble." I trailed my fingertips down his sides, bringing my lips to his again as he shuddered. The kiss became clumsy and erratic as I started to tease him, and he shifted to meet my hand at all the right places. His mouth left mine, his teeth nipping at my throat as he closed what little space was left between us. My whole body was too warm, the water only adding to the heat and leaving me hypersensitive.
"Just do it- please, Garrett." My name had never sounded so good coming out of his mouth, and I was pulling his hair without meaning to.
"Are you sure?" As much as I wanted it, I didn't want alcohol or sleep deprivation to get the better of his common sense and for this experience to turn out unpleasant for him. He nodded, moving against me so that it was easier on both of us. I pressed a kiss against his forehead, gripping his shoulders as I slowly pushed into him. A wave of tension rushed through his body and then he melted into me, pushing down against my hips every time I moved into him. Adrenaline pulsed through my body and I desperately tried to hold out a little longer, leaning my head back against the tiles as Carlisle tried to figure out where to grab me. I needn't have worried about holding out; he was done for after a few more minutes, both of us trying to keep quiet and not disturb our neighbours. It was all over for me as he tightened around me, and I bit the inside of my lip to smother a groan.
The urgency was gone the next time he hugged me. He leaned his cheek against my shoulder, slowly rubbing circles against my chest as we tried to catch our breath again. I covered his hand with mine, kissing the top of his head. "The bath wasn't so bad, huh?" I teased.
"Not with you," he murmured.
We stayed there until the water started to get a little cold, and only then pulled ourselves out. Carlisle insisted on us showering before we got dried again, and I half-heartedly agreed in exchange for more kisses. It was just after 10PM when we fell into bed together, putting on a random movie for some background noise until we were ready to sleep. "So is this what we do now, when things turn to shit for us? Go running to the beach?" I mumbled, moulding my body to the shape of his.
Sleepy, it took him a moment to respond, and he leaned back against my chest. "I guess so. Alistair always did tease me about us not ever going on holiday together."
I rolled my eyes, remembering similar conversations with my brother. "Eleazar and Carmen used to go away together once a year, before they had a kid. I never really understood why they enjoyed it so much until now."
"Maybe we're fake adults, then." The joke wasn't even close to the truth, and I felt a bit ill.
"Maybe we're adults with financial difficulties," I mumbled. Because of me.
"Hey, we didn't come all the way out here to worry about that. We'll manage, Garrett, we can work it out." Twisting in my arms until he could face me, he pressed a kiss against my lips. "I don't want you to stress this weekend."
"I know, I just feel so bad that I'm doing this to us. Things were finally settling down, and now we're back to square one because of me." I covered his hand with mine as his fingertips teased my chest, and for the first time since I'd broken the news to him, he was starting to look a little upset.
He bit down on his lip, burying his face in my shoulder and hugging me tightly when it wasn't enough to control the wave of emotion. "This isn't your fault, Gar, it's mine. I'm the reason you had so much time off work, and they wouldn't have let you go if you hadn't have had to stay home with me so often."
I knew him well enough to know that he was struggling to hold back tears, even if I couldn't see his face. "I was never a good employee, Carlisle. I could never do what he asked me, everything I handed in was shitty, and I could never focus there. It's been happening for years." Needing more contact, I ran my hand down his back, nudging him closer and hoping he'd look up at me.
"If your work was bad, then you boss wouldn't have been hounding you to do more; he obviously thought that you were good." His lips were against my throat, pressing kisses along my jaw and tangling his fingers in my hair. "I'm sorry; it really is my fault."
The bed groaned as I rolled onto my back. "No, it isn't. Stop saying that; you can't blame yourself for my uselessness." I'd pulled him on top of me, forgetting the movie as he slid one of his legs between mine and resting my chin on the top of his head as he leaned against my chest. "I'm so scared that I will have to move back in to my parents; I've always felt like such an idiot for not going to university after high school. I'm 27 - I already feel like a failure for having such a shitty career anyway, and if I have to do that, I don't know what I would do, and I thought that you wouldn't want to stay with me anymore, and…" I trailed off, seeing how much assumption had stung for him.
"I love you, Garrett, I wouldn't leave you for something that isn't your fault in the first place. I'll keep you safe; I won't let anything happen to you until you get back on your feet again. I can pick up some extra work, and we'll be okay." He was trying really, really hard not to cry, and I felt like that was because of me too. Stressed already. "I love you so much, I'm sorry, this is all my fault anyway. I love you."
I just hugged him against me. "Thank you for this weekend." I didn't deserve this.
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