To make this more fun to you the reader, I suggest putting on the theme from Video Game Confessions ( /watch?v=tCrrZ1NnCuM )
Multimedia Confessions - Season 1
You're introduced to a young Saya-jin/Endurion male of Blasian descent at about 6'0" with a fighter's frame. His hair spiked and black with eyes of light gray and electrical blue ends on his hair. He wears a black three piece suit with a dark blue collared tie, a tie, and black boots.
"This is Ryo Nazo Blackthorn, a Time Patroller and younger brother to Joshinari Blackthorn. Ryo works in the seven-star restaurant known as the Tori Dragon Palace (which is two blocks away from the Pixel Palace). Now it has expanded where all across the media, all around the multiverse, many pop in to have a drink. Sometimes, they share stories, and even secrets. Because—as we all know—what the bartender hears is confidential... isn't it?"
Episode 7 – Ariel…the Original One
So here I was tending the bar in storms in Ariel from the Little Mermaid. The animated one. I'm sad that I have to specify that now. She sits down at the bar and asking for a Zombie, two of them. Now everyone in the bar looks like her.
What's a Zombie? A powerful mixture of three types of rum, lime juice, falernum, angostura bitters, pernod, grenadine, and a mix of cinnamon syrup and grapefruit juice for that kick. One of the strongest cocktails around…so strong that you limit customers to two a night.
"I am legally obligated to warn you that you can only have two of them."
She put bills on the table.
"I consent." She said.
Well, I may hate Disney now, but I'll happily snag their money. I made her the drinks as my junior was dealing with serving Velma. I made the drinks and she downs one instantly. I could see the hot tears coming down from her reaction to the drink as she slams the glass down.
"Ryo, right? I swear I'm not a racist…" Ariel said.
I immediately knew what this was about.
"The live-action remakes sucks…and it was completely unneeded to make a black Ariel. Lazy, even." I said to her,
She looks at me with absolute relief on her face. I had a feeling this was what she wanted to hear.
"Thank you. It's been nothing but people calling me a racist or saying I whitewashed the movie." Ariel said as she started drinking. "I'm not a racist…"
"You're not. People are just being stupid. Racism is a way for the rich and powerful to trick the poor and stupid into fighting each other." I said firmly. "Besides, your movie still stands tall…while the remake will fade into being the punchline of a bad joke. Just like the other live-action pieces of garbage."
She finished the second drink.
"So why the fuck do they keep making them?!" She snapped them. "Why ruin what's not broken?"
Oh boy, the alcohol was hitting her hard. She basically rants about how she's the only Disney princess they did this to. She kept asking for the strong stuff. A Long Island Iced Tea, Death in the Afternoon, and two Aunt Robertas. Good grief, Ariel was cycling through many emotions before passing out on the floor after trying to drink a bottle of brandy. All that split liquor on the floor getting into her dress and face…
It's a tragedy for all that good booze on the floor…
Oh right, Ariel. Don't worry, I called her emergency contact in her wallet…and her husband came for her. Eric came in and just looked at her before looking up at me.
"Reboot?" He asked.
I sigh and nod. He just pays up for the drinks as Ariel begins to wake up, looking lucid for a brief moment.
"The mouse in the house is not to be trusted!" She yelled before slumping over on Eric's shoulder.
Sadly, that's probably among the most profound things someone said while completely smashed.
You see a lot of strange things as a bartender, see a lot of strange things at the Tori Dragon. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bartender at the Tori Dragon, and that isn't no lie. Swear to it!
(A/N: Case in point, the live-action reboots are all unneeded cash grabs.)