To make this more fun to you the reader, I suggest putting on the theme from Video Game Confessions ( /watch?v=tCrrZ1NnCuM )

Multimedia Confessions - Season 1

You're introduced to a young Saya-jin/Endurion male of Blasian descent at about 6'0" with a fighter's frame. His hair spiked and black with eyes of light gray and electrical blue ends on his hair. He wears a black three piece suit with a dark blue collared tie, a tie, and black boots.

"This is Ryo Nazo Blackthorn, a Time Patroller and younger brother to Joshinari Blackthorn. Ryo works in the seven-star restaurant known as the Tori Dragon Palace (which is two blocks away from the Pixel Palace). Now it has expanded where all across the media, all around the multiverse, many pop in to have a drink. Sometimes, they share stories, and even secrets. Because—as we all know—what the bartender hears is confidential... isn't it?"

Episode 9 – Snow White (and Florian)

So here I was tending the bar as usual, and on walks…one of the Disney Princess OGs, Snow White. Though, princess is a misnomer…she's a Queen and looks as such. Even if she only grew an inch taller…but I digress. She's followed in by husband Florian. Nice guy and all, but a bit quiet. A man of action, really. They sat at the bar…and I saw the looks at their faces. Snow White's a sweetheart trying to hide the displeasure on their faces.

"Let me guess, the live-action reboot." I said as Florian nodded. "Ok, first drink's on the house. What can I get you?"

"A cup of Bacardi 151 on the rocks." Snow White said. "For the both of us."

That's near raw alcohol but I serve it up for them. Snow White requests me to leave the bottle citing she'll pay for that before they drink.

"First they ax the Seven Dwarves off the title, then they're not even dwarves, and now they're fucking bandits!" Snow spat in disgust.

Never thought I'd hear Snow swear or show disgust, but I guess even she had limits. Florian was silent for the most part, and he got up to go outside. I ask if he's ok.

"Yes, he is just prefers to not let out too much emotions in the open. Give him a minute." Snow White said gently. "So you're already up to speed on the situation."

"Disney is literally burning right now. I still don't even understand why Zegler for Snow White and why Gal Gadot as the Evil Queen!" I say.

"I know. It's like, have they not seen Gal Gadot? When I saw her picture…I had to ask how would anyone buy that she feels less attractive than Zegler. Especially when Zegler speaks." Snow said as I laughed at the jab.

Florian came back in.

"Sorry, I just…I'm still processing." Florian said.

"Look, don't let it bother you. Zegler's some talentless hack with a silver spoon where her brain should be. It wasn't like she acted in anything of quality…just nothing but shit." I say plainly. "But she's a symptom of the real problem. The casting director, the writers, and the producers…along with the big D itself."

"People keep saying dear Walt would be rolling in his grave, and personally I think invoking that is a bit disrespectful." Snow White said with a sigh. "But given Walt had no intent of a sequel or remake, I can't help but feel this reboot isn't a good idea. I don't understand the point of wasting money on live action stuff when we're in the animation business. It's like they're ashamed of animation."

"Blame the Avengers…" Florian muttered under his breath.

So I leave them to drink and deal with other customers only for Shrek and Donkey to come to the bar. I expected a fight, but they had the same saddened faces as Snow White and Florian. I asked what's wrong…and I wish I hadn't asked. Steve Harwell's dead. Who was he? Co-founder of Smash Mouth…it's his voice that sings All-Star. What is with 2023? Ironically, he died because of his alcohol abuse…the irony isn't lost on me as I serve up drinks. Shrek and Snow White actually have pretty decent conversation, mostly on the state of things. I guess I shouldn't be surprised Shrek was uneasy about his new movie even with the Puss in Boots movie.

"Where's Puss? I figured he'd be here celebrating." I asked.

"He's out celebrating with his lover and surrogate son." Shrek said as Donkey snickered.

Figures.

"If there's one relief to this is that Rachel Zegler's career is very much over. That movie will flop if it comes or never sees the light of day. Disney's reputation is once again in the toilet and the world moves on. I expect you to see more of us coming to get drunk." Snow White said.

And then in walks Nani Pelekai from Lilo and Stitch…who saunters up to put a roll of bills in my hand and ask for the kind of drink to make her forget her own name. In the end, more Disney characters showed up…it was pretty depressing to see them so down.

You see a lot of strange things as a bartender, see a lot of strange things at the Tori Dragon. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bartender at the Tori Dragon. It's anything but boring…

(A/N: I took my potshots, but they were all well deserved. Let's be real, this movie is going to be a disaster and should have never happened. Disney deserves every ounce of bad press coming to them for this. RIP Steve Harwell, you were the real all-star and you will be missed. 2023 has not the best of years.)