Chapter 3

A noise pulled him from his restless slumber. He became alert in an instant - a trick he'd learnt from years of living in Seheron. Not by so much as a blink of an eye did he betray that he'd awoken as he listened intently for a repeat of the noise that had intruded on a rather nice dream. He suppressed a shiver; the fire had died down at some point letting the coldness seep back into the room, and his skinny blanket did little to fend off the chill. There! A floorboard creaked close to him. He opened his eyes and immediately focused on the bed, checking on Cara. Fuck! She wasn't there. He stood, a sense of urgency rushing through his blood, and surveyed the room as well as he could in the darkness but could see nothing. Impatiently, he waited for the creaking again to help accurately pinpoint his target. Bull only had to wait a few seconds. His head whipped around to focus near the foot of the bed, but still, he couldn't see anyone.

With more stealth than might be expected of one his size, he took a few steps forward and searched the area again. This time he spotted a person and moved swiftly. His hand shot forward and gripped a collar. "Who are you?"
An annoyed familiar female voice answered him, "What the hell are you doing, Bull?!"
"Boss?" He leaned forward and saw the unmistakable angry glint of her green eyes glaring at him. He lifted her onto the bed. "Why are you crawling around in the middle of the night?"
"I'm trying to find the bloody chamber pot."
Bull noticed her squirming movements and realisation dawned on him. "Ah, right. It's over there." He pointed to a decorative screen. She squinted, following the direction of his finger, but couldn't see anything resembling a pot. "Where?"
"Can you light the torch? I don't want to trip over a stool while taking you there."
She did as he asked but refused his offer to carry her. "Just show me where I'm supposed to go." Ignoring her request, he scooped her back into his arms. "Bull, I can just crawl over there."
"I know, but this is faster and more comfortable for you." By the time they'd finished talking, he'd already reached the area and pointed out a chair. "That's it."
She looked at it with a raised brow, then back to Bull. "I know I took a knock to the head so I'm probably not with it, but where the hell is the bowl?"
He laughed and gently put her down, then lifted the padded seat revealing the chamber pot. "Give me a shout when you're finished and I'll come and collect you."

After he got her back to bed, he moved to his chair and pulled the blanket over his body trying to get as much of himself as possible under the thin cover.
"Bull, there's plenty of room in the bed." She chuckled at the speed with which he left the chair and climbed in next to her. He sighed happily as he huddled under the thick quilt. "Thanks. That blanket was as useful as a chocolate teapot."
Cara chuckled. "No problem. I don't want you coming down with a cold," She closed her eyes but found sleep evaded her. She wanted to blame the throbbing in her ankle but knew that having the big Qunari so close was the real reason. She twisted and turned in an effort to fall asleep.
"Stop fidgeting, you're pulling the blankets off me," Bull grumbled.
"Sorry," she whispered. Cara focused on remaining still while clearing her mind. Usually, such actions helped. Twenty minutes passed and she moved on to breathing exercises. After a further ten minutes, she'd become increasingly frustrated. If she could, she would have got out of bed and gone for a walk, but that wasn't an option, and she didn't think crawling up and down the floorboards would be as helpful. Suddenly, inspiration struck, and she searched the bedside table for the bottle of mead. A couple of shots of that should knock her out. She spotted the bottle and reached over; the cool glass brushed against her fingers, so tantalisingly close, but not close enough. She shuffled along the mattress, just a bit further...Thud!
"Ow!"

"Cara! Are you all right?" Bull stretched across the mattress and found the Inquisitor on the floor. "Do you need to go again?"
She gritted her teeth and replied with a snap, "No, I don't. I was trying to reach the bottle." Grabbing the edge of the nightstand, she pulled herself up, rejecting Bull's offer to lift her. In her current frustrated state, she couldn't handle his hands on her skin. She grunted as she put pressure on her ankle, but eventually got back on the bed without any help. She could feel Bull's eyes boring into her back. "I'm fine. Go back to sleep."

She heard him shift around and hoped he was lying down; instead, his hand rested on her shoulder. She tensed at his touch, trying to fight the feelings it evoked in her body. "Cara, you know I love a drink as much as the next person-"
"Right, and the barmaids that deliver them!" The words shot out like tainted arrows. His touch had been the final cut to snap her already taut nerves. She breathed in and out trying to find her calm as she berated herself for letting loose the bitter words. "I'm sorry, it's no business of mine who you sleep with."
He grabbed her arm and turned her to face him. Cara was shocked at his angry expression. "How would you know whether I'm sleeping with them? You haven't been in the tavern for months now!"
She tried to pull away, but Bull kept hold. "I couldn't..." Her lips clamped together as she stopped the damning words from being said.
"You couldn't what?" he questioned, refusing to let the matter drop.
"Damn it, Bull! What do you want me to say?"
He moved in close, his hand framing her face. "I want you to tell me you still care for me, even after I screwed things up."
She stopped struggling and stared at him as her mind tried to catch up with his unexpected words. "What?"
Bull rubbed a large hand over the short bristles on his head. "When I explained how things would work between us," he said, "I was trying to protect myself. I couldn't believe how I felt about you after just one night together. No one's managed to get to me like that, and it scared the shit out of me. So, I said we were friends with benefits, and we could both walk away whenever we wanted to." He climbed off the bed and walked to the nightstand. "You're right, we do need a drink for this."

Cara sat up and leaned against the headboard trying to get more comfortable. He climbed back into bed and handed her a full glass, then immediately swallowed his own drink. He leaned forward as if to avoid looking at her. "When you ended it, I figured it was for the best. I was still with the Qun, and the Inquisition was supposed to be a temporary arrangement."
He refilled his glass and took a mouthful as he gathered his thoughts. Cara sipped silently at her drink; her mind whirling with everything he'd told her, but in the centre of it all there kindled a spark of hope.
"When the alliance with the Qunari fell through, I wanted to see if you'd be willing to give it another try. But you'd stopped coming into the tavern and seemed distant whenever we spoke. So, after a chat with Varric, I decided to talk to you in the hope that you hadn't moved on."
She shook her head, "No, I hadn't, I just couldn't..."
He leaned against the headboard and chuckled. "I feel like we've come full circle."

Cara saw the gleam of amusement in his eye and realised it had been at that point she'd previously clammed up. She gave him a rueful smile and gulped down the remainder of her drink. "I couldn't go back to the tavern because... well, it was bloody painful watching you lead those women to your room every night." She held out her glass but instead of filling it, he took it from her and put it on the nightstand.
His large hand curved around her jaw. "I'm sorry about that, Cara. I thought they would take my mind off you, but they couldn't compare to you, and so I told them I was off limits."
She toyed with her glass. "You don't need to apologise. I shouldn't have ended things. If I'd been more patient we would have still reached this point, but with less heartache. I just... I couldn't start something with you while your heart wasn't in it."
He stroked her soft cheek. "It was, Kadan; it always has been."
"Kadan?"
"My heart." Cara's heartbeat quickened as he entwined his fingers with hers. His grip tightened briefly, as he quietly asked, "Will you give me another chance?"
She lifted a hand to his face, felt the tightness of his jaw, and realised he was nervous about her reply. "Yeah, Bull... Kadan, I will."
His arm slipped around her waist pulling her closer until they were but a breath apart. "I love you, Kadan." His warm lips pressed against hers; she sighed happily and opened to him as he lowered her to the mattress and pulled the quilt around them. "I love you, too, Bull."

The End