Midnight (Coldplay)

SANTANA'S POV

"So, I saw your list, and this was on it. I know most of the stuff was meant for you and Mama Q to do but I wanted this all to myself. Is that okay?"

I held tight to Beth's hand as we made our way down to the beach. It had been a crazy morning, and I didn't want her first Christmas memory with Quinn to be tainted.

"Yes."

"Good because I also wanted to talk to you about something important and you seem smart enough to handle what I'm going to say."

"I can handle anything."

"That's what I thought."

We walked down onto the sand, not venturing too much because even though the weather was almost summer-like, the water was still cold.

"You like her, like her, right?" Beth asked as we stared out at the ocean.

I nodded.

"I do."

"Does she hang your moon?"

I nodded again.

"She does. I didn't know that until this weekend though."

"But you know now?" She asked. I was starting to feel like this was an interrogation, but I was absolutely prepared.

"I do."

"You were married to Brittany?"

"I was, who told you?"

"Brittany."

Her birthday. It somehow hadn't dawned on me that the Ferris Wheel and Beth's birthday were the same day.

"We are better as friends."

"Good because cheating is bad."

"Yeah, it is."

"Be good to her, okay? I love her so much. I don't like her to be sad."

"I will. I promise. I don't like her to be sad either."

"Good."

She got quiet after that. I watched as she kicked the sand at her feet. Seemingly waiting for me to finally say what I had wanted to say.

"How much do you know about Mama Q, Beth?"

"I know her favorite color is green and that she can sing and dance. I know she is great and that I love her."

"Do you know anything about how she grew up?"

"In Lima?" She asked.

"Yes."

"No. She doesn't talk about it."

"Well, what happened upstairs this morning...with her yelling and losing her temper, well that's something that has happened to her more than once. Her dad...your grandfather was not good to her."

"He wasn't?" She asked, looking at me in concentration.

"He yelled a lot and when your Mama found out you were coming, he kicked her out of her home."

"Oh no!" She said, tears in her eyes. "That's bad!"

"I know. Your Mama Q though, she's the strongest person that I know."

"Me too." She squeaked as she stared at me, her eyes full of questions. "Did he hurt her?"

"Not that day but yes, all the time. He was very strict and had A LOT of rules. I think she is afraid to be that way with you."

"Mama Q is great. She has rules but they are good ones. Like eat my vegetables and do my homework before I play. She tells me why I need to listen."

"And she doesn't yell, right?" I asked. I knew that I was bordering a line, but I needed to know so that I could help Quinn go in a different direction if necessary.

"Never. Just today, but she's sorry. I'm sorry."

"Good. She wouldn't hurt you, Beth, even if she is afraid she will be like her dad to you. I know she won't. She loves you so much. Ever since she found out you were going to be born, she's loved you."

"Yeah?"

"Yup, and you know what, I've loved you too."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"She's not like her dad. She's a good Mama. I love her."

"Can you do me a favor, Beth?" I asked as I took her hand, not wanting to keep her outside for too long. I didn't trust Quinn not to tear Rachel to shreds before too long.

"Okay."

"If you ever see her get sad, remind her that you love her. Parents sometimes need to hear that kind of thing. Can you promise me that?"

She nodded with a smile.

"I promise."

"Good...now, enough of the serious talks. Let's go have some fun."

"Yay!" She bounced up and down as we made our way off the sand and into the sandals we had left on the pier.

I knew that she was just a kid, and I hoped I hadn't gone too far in telling her about Russell, but I hoped that Beth understood Quinn a little more.

QUINN'S POV

Santana asked Beth to take a walk on the beach with her while me and Rachel got ready for the show...another list item and after our tense moment this morning, Beth seemed relieved to give the both of us some space.

And honestly, so was I.

Santana had stared me down before she left and gave me the shortest, most surprising lecture ever.

"It's Christmas. Be nice to Rachel."

And so that's what I was doing. We were both dressed, and Rachel seemed endlessly quiet as we sat on the balcony off of Santana's bedroom, watching the ocean.

From where we were sitting, we could see Santana and Beth standing in the sand, staring off at the same ocean, having what looked like an intense conversation.

The polar opposite of the silence that was going on between me and Rachel.

Not that she hadn't tried to have small talk. I just hadn't responded.

I didn't feel the need to say a word to her if you have nothing nice to say...right?

Once Santana and Beth were back, both looking windswept and gorgeous, we were about ready to go when Rachel came out of the bathroom, back in her clothes from yesterday and her bag over her shoulder.

"Berry, what are you doing?" Santana asked, her face twisted up into a scowl.

"Thank you for your hospitality, Santana. It was nice to wake up this morning among people that I love. That being said, I think I'll catch up with you all later at the rink."

I suddenly felt bad for freezing her out, but I wasn't about to get into it with her.

"That sounds great." I said.

Santana shot me a look and then sighed.

"Rachel, you can come with us. The first show is Wicked. You love that show."

"It's perfectly fine, I've seen it a dozen times. You three go and enjoy it. I need to go make my holiday phone calls and get some laundry going while the rest of my building is preoccupied. So the rink at 7?"

Santana looked at me, and I nodded. She knew I wasn't going to fight for Rachel to come, and so there was no reason to insist.

"Yes, we will be there at seven. If you change your mind before the second show...come and join us."

"I don't think I will but thank you for the offer."

When Rachel left, I felt a spark of guilt, but it lasted for only a moment.

Santana, though, had always held onto things longer.

I was being petulant.

Rachel triggered a deep-seated resentment in me.

"No me gusta, Lucy Q." Santana said to me while I got dressed.

She'd waited until Beth was distracted by a video chat with Vincent in the other room to pounce.

"It's not that deep, San, it's just Rachel."

She flinched.

"What's gotten into you today, Q? First Beth and now Rachel."

"I've got a lot on my plate, I want it to be perfect. Rachel being around, I don't know, she reminds me of Shelby."

"Did you stop to think that maybe that's a good thing? This is Beth's first Christmas without the only mom she's known. Having Rachel close probably soothed some of that ache for Beth."

"Shit. You're right."

"And another thing, I know you and Rachel have always had this weird relationship, but when you say shit like it's just Rachel, that's a red flag for me."

I turned to her and could see the seriousness in her eyes.

"How so?"

"Because, Q, that's what Britt always said about you. It's just Quinn, poor sad, teen mom, Quinn. Her feelings don't matter."

"Oh God. I'm reminding you of her?"

"A little, yeah, and I don't like it one bit, Quinn."

"Okay, well, that's concerning. I'll course correct, San. I'm sorry for how I conducted myself."

"I hope so, Q, because I'm telling you now, I don't think I can handle another Brittany. I won't go through that, not again, even if it means we pump the breaks."

"Ouch. I don't want that."

"Good, me either."

SANTANA'S POV

"What's with the face, Q?"

It was intermission, and Beth was talking to another little girl excitedly about her favorite part about five feet away.

Quinn kept letting out little sighs throughout the whole show, and I was feeling annoyed with her.

"I'm fine." She said, watching Beth with a hawk-eyed stare.

"Oh now, I know you're not fine. What's up with you, Q?"

"Nothing."

"Is it me?"

She finally turned and looked at me, her expression blank and a little colder than I had seen in a very long time.

"Do you really think that I could become Russell?"

"I never really thought it was possible, Q. Our parents though, they are embedded in us. Look at Rachel, it's like Shelby raised her. The same with Beth and you. There are going to be times that Russell comes out of you."

"I feel like a terrible mother. I saw you down on the beach with her talking and then you came back, and she looked insanely happy. It reminded me of those times when I would gravitate towards your mom picking her over mine. Is this karma because I liked Maribel better? And then...the idea that Beth could like you better than me..."

"Mama? Why are you crying?" Beth suddenly popped up, her face full of concern as the lights flickered, signaling the end of intermission.

Quinn smiled at Beth and shook her head. "I'm okay sweets, the play is just sad."

Beth smiled and reached up for Quinn to pick her up.

It was the first time that I saw Quinn actually hold her, and it was probably the most perfect sight.

Quinn took on this ethereal glow when she looked into Beth's face. They whispered to each other, and I snapped a few quick pictures because she needed to see just how unlike Russell she actually was.

On the cab ride to the rink that night, Quinn's spirit seemed to lift a bit because, from the moment Beth had seen her mother cry, she'd become extra clingy.

That kid is just the salt of the Earth.

I love her more than I realized was possible, and I wanted so badly to be a permanent fixture in her life.

And I couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Beth, can I tell you something."

She looked over at me and nodded.

"Okay."

Quinn was looking at me, too, her eyes questioning.

"I love your mom, and I was wondering if it would be okay with you if I started dating her?"

Beth smiled and looked at Quinn, whose eyes were large. I knew she would continue to drag her feet, and this whole fiasco over money had just soured everything.

Who knew how much it could set us back?

"Yes."

"You approve then?"

"Yes! When I go to Texas, Mama should stay with you."

"You know, kid...I was thinking the same thing. What do you say, Q, ditch Lima and stay in New York for the New Year."

"I have work this week all the way up to New Year's Eve, I told you that S...that's why I'm not going to Texas with Beth."

"Then I'll come to Philly after my shift Monday night."

"But..." She began, but Beth was nodding in agreement.

"Yes! You can go back to Chocolate Heaven for more bacon!" Beth added.

We both clasped our hands in front of our faces and pouted until Quinn crumbled.

"Fine...just...stop with those faces!" She said, her serious face turning to a grin. It was the first real one we had seen all day and so it was no surprise when Beth threw herself against her mother in a hug.

Neither of them acted shocked when I joined in.

I knew right then that I could love the two of them forever!

QUINN'S POV

I have never seen Santana put her foot down like she did in that cab, and my fears of Beth somehow not accepting us or being upset about it seemed to be unfounded.

I needed to relax.

Actually, what I needed was to have lots of sex and cuddles.

My sexual frustration, mixed with my fear of becoming my father and Beth betting on us, had culminated in me becoming insane today.

Thankfully, the two of them pulled me out of it because I was starting to get on my nerves.

I leaned against the wall, with a hot chocolate in my hand, as I watched Santana and Beth skate around the ice.

My back was bothering me, and they had both agreed that I had been through enough today and let me sit it out.

Rachel had come late, baring her hot chocolate, spewing another list of apologies, but this time, I was more receptive.

"You're off the hook, Rachel."

She sighed and then handed me an envelope.

"Good...Santana wanted me to give you that." She rested against the wall next to me and watched the girls skate.

I opened the envelope, and there was a picture of me holding Beth earlier. The look on my face, completely as I was consumed with love for my little girl, showed me way more than I could have ever been told.

I wasn't my father, and Santana was making sure that I knew that.

Without warning, I was crying yet again.

"How did you get this?" I asked, and she smiled.

"She texted me and asked me to have it printed."

I pulled Rachel into a hug and nearly sent us both flying on the ice, but she held us steady...go figure.

"Thank you for this. It's perfect."

"She told me your concerns and you have no need to worry, you're new to this mother thing but from what I can see, you're doing a great job. The way you look at her is in no way how your father looks at you...correct?" I nodded. "You love Beth, you've lost her once, I know for a fact you won't do anything to lose her twice. I'm proud of you, Quinn."

And even though Beth had proved it and Santana had said it, hearing it from Rachel...who at that moment looked more like Shelby than I had ever really noticed, reached me on a deeper level than ever.

I felt like my heart was growing three sizes at that moment, and it felt ridiculously good.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Mom. Merry Christmas." I whispered as the cab took us back to Queens. Beth was asleep in Santana's lap, and she was in the middle of texting back and forth with people.

"I've called you several times today, Quinnie. Is this the first time you were able to call?"

"Yes. It's been a busy day, you know, Beth's first Christmas with me."

"How was it?"

"A little bumpy but, for the most part, very good."

"What happened?"

"Nothing, it's over, I'd rather not rehash it."

"Why not? Do you know that due to your father's fall, I've been sitting in a nearly empty house all day. Alone."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Yeah, well, you should be. I thought you would invite me to spend this day with you and Beth.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I guess, you usually go to California, and I know how much you enjoy being with Fran and the kids on Christmas...I didn't think-"

"Yeah, it seems you've been doing a lot of that."

"A lot of what?"

"Not thinking. How could you stay with Santana for Thanksgiving AND Christmas? Do you know how that looks?"

"I'm not going to ruin the last few hours of Christmas arguing with you, Mother."

"So I guess that means that you don't care how it looks?" She was becoming belligerent, which only meant one thing.

"You've been drinking, haven't you? I thought...tell me that this hasn't been going on long."

I could feel Santana looking at me, but I chose to look out the window. This was not how things should be going.

Between her and Rachel, with some help from Beth, they had rescued me from sinking into depression and with just one conversation, my mother was quickly returning me to the low that I was feeling only an hour ago.

She was sobbing now, lamenting about all the things that I was ungrateful for, and I was sitting there taking it.

"Mama?" Beth's sleepy voice said as we came to a stop outside of Santana's apartment building.

"Yes, Sweets?" I said once we were on the curb and making our way to the building.

"Is everything okay? Who's that?" She asked as she pointed to my phone.

"Grandma Judy." I said to her, and she smiled.

"Can I talk to her?"

Mother was still going, still crying and a bit unhinged; the idea of unleashing that part of her on Beth seemed unthinkable, but Santana was holding her hand out for the phone, too.

She was a safer bet.

"Mother..." She kept on. "Mom? Please...can I..." She was hiccupping now but was silent. "Santana wanted to talk to you a second...okay?"

"Fine. Put her on. This conversation isn't over though, Lucille! Not by a long shot!"

"Gotcha. Hold on a sec."

Santana, how can I even be so blessed to have her in my life and my corner? No wonder Brittany didn't want to let her go.

"Hi Judy, Merry Christmas!" She said excitedly; her face got twisted up, and she nodded in response to whatever my mother was saying before finally smiling. "Right." She shot me a look and then smiled again. "I definitely understand. My parents would never let it go. Yes I called them...uh...first thing this morning. Yes, I know. I let her sleep in. It's my fault really, I've kept these two ladies very busy today. Okay...okay...yeah...right but listen, that's understandable but right now what you are wasting is time to talk to your granddaughter who is chomping at the bit to talk to you...yes...I'm not kidding, I promise you. Well, she was sleeping when Quinn first called but she's awake now and waiting anxiously."

"Is everything okay, Mama?" Beth asked when Santana didn't hand her the phone right away.

"Yes, Grandma Judy can just be very dramatic, and Santana is trying to get her ready to talk to you."

"Oh...Mom was very dramatic too." She said, a small smile crossing her face as she thought of Shelby.

"That's where Rachel gets it from." I added, and she grinned.

"Yass!" She said, and I couldn't help but crack up.

Santana handed me my phone back while she opened the door for us.

"She's going to call back to talk to Beth, she is going to jump in the shower."

"Your suggestion?" I asked, and she nodded.

"Go easy on her, Q. She misses you."

Beth was captivated by our conversation, and I didn't like it one bit.

"Okay, Missy. Grandma Judy is going to call you back, so go get washed up and changed." Beth pouted, and I raised an eyebrow, "Unless you'd rather just go straight to bed?"

"I'll be back!" She squealed, running straight to the bathroom.

"Good girl."

"So...it turns I have to work all next week, New Years is a big deal in the bar world, but Carlo said if I come in and work tonight's close and tomorrow's inventory that I can have the week."

She looked at me like she was ready for me to yell at her or make her feel guilty...remnants of Brittany, I'm sure.

"That's fine. I need to confirm with Lydia about tomorrow's flight. She's supposed to get in really early and I want to make sure I'm there on time."

"Right. I forgot about that." She looked like she was second-guessing going to work now that her playmate was leaving her early in the morning.

"So what time do you have to be at work?"

She looked down at her watch, the one that I got her for Christmas and smiled...obviously thinking of me, which was exactly what I wanted.

"I need to be there in an hour, it takes ten minutes to get there...so I have a bit. Are you hungry?"

"A little."

"Pad Thai?" She asked, her bottom lip trapped by her teeth as she pulled her phone from her pocket.

"Are they open? It's late."

"This is New York, everything is open."

"On Christmas?"

She chuckled, "Especially on Christmas."

With my mom on speaker and the three of us on the floor surrounding the food on the coffee table, we closed out our Christmas better than I could have imagined, and my Mom had pulled herself together pretty quickly.

Especially after Santana had texted her mother to go over the my mother's house.

"So, what's the plan for New Year's?" Maribel asked, and neither Santana nor I had the chance to answer.

"Well, I'm going to Texas to celebrate Hannukah, but Santana is going to stay with Mama at our house!" Beth shrieked before dropping her head and taking a huge bite of noodles. Her cheeks were red as she blushed.

"Really? So does that mean..." Mother began.

"Are you together now?" Maribel cut in.

"Yeah, are you?" Beth asked and there was silence on the lines. I shot her a look because, after today, I was really second-guessing being so open about some things with her. She was a kid, and not everything was meant for her ears.

"Oh look at that, I need to get to work. Ladies it's been a pleasure, but Beth here needs to get to bed." Santana said, smirking at me and winking.

"Yes she does...say goodnight, Sweets." I said to her, and she seemed to get the message.

"Beth, sweetie, do you know anything?" Mom asked Beth, who was shaking her head and shrugging.

"Um...no." She let out a huge fake yawn. "Oh, Mama is saying it's time for bed. Night, Grandma, night Mama Lopez."

"Oh no, seriously, come on you can't just leave us hanging!" Maribel said with a chuckle. "Doesn't look like we are getting anything out of them, Judy."

"I guess not. Goodnight sweeties!" Mother said, her spirits seeming higher than they were earlier...even if we were being coy about our relationship.

"Goodnight Mom. I'll call you tomorrow when I drop Beth at the airport."

I tucked Beth into bed, her eyes barely open as she yawned, this time for real. I brushed a hair from her face and kissed her forehead before pulling back and smiling at my most precious gift.

"So, did you have a good day?"

"The best, there was only one thing missing."

"Shelby?"

"Yes but she would have loved that we did all of her favorite things today."

"Well good. Do you think you'll want to do this next year?"

"Yes. Is that okay?"

"It is...now then, get some sleep because we have to get up super early."

"Okay, Mama."

"Is she sleeping?" Santana asked as she waited outside the door with a small smile on her lips.

"Almost." I said before leaning in and kissing her hard. My heart soared at the feel of her lips on mine. When we pulled away, she looked all dreamy-eyed, and then she scowled.

"I wish I didn't have to go in." She grumbled, the lines on her face deeper. "This isn't fair. I mean, it's not like he'll be my boss in another week anyway!"

"Yes, I know but he did you a big favor by getting his daughter to meet with you, so you'll go in and be nice to the man who helped you start living again."

"Shit, Q...all that?" Her eyes were wide, and I just nodded.

"Yes. Now...go make some great tips because I expect you to take me to a more grown-up dinner once we get back to Philly."

"Was the chocolate-covered bacon not enough?"

"Mmmm...I'd like to cover you in chocolate." I joked, and she practically melted right there, growling and pulling me closer, her lips attacking mine.

The kiss was fire, and I couldn't get enough of it.

Her phone chimed, and she pulled back, groaning.

"Damnit!"

"Your alarm?" I asked, and she nodded. Stealing another kiss before pulling away completely.

"Fuck, man...you're make it so hard to leave. I'm distracted now!"

"You get me all next week...and tomorrow all day."

Her face brightened up once she realized that after we dropped off Beth, we'd be all alone for hours.

"Well I will see you in the morning then...what time do you have to be at the airport?"

"Five."

"I get off at four so, I'll just go with you ladies."

"Sounds like a plan."

"I love you, Q." She said, kissing me once more before turning and yanking the door open..."Sleep tight."

"I love you...be safe."

"Always."