As (Stevie Wonder)
MARCH
QUINN'S POV
"Are you sure?" San asked me as I stood beside her, leaning on my crutches for support.
"I am beginning to hate that question."
"You've been on crutches for a week, you told me you wanted to be able to fully walk first."
"I was delusional, San. The doctors are amazed that I made it this far. I have rods in my spine, and while I'm finally healing, I am starting to be realistic. I can't let this hold me back from marrying you any longer."
"Okay. I'll let Mami know."
"No need, I already told her."
"When?"
"She called to check in, I told her that I wanted to get married during Spring Break."
"What about Judy?"
"I told her too, I've learned my lesson about telling your parents before my mother. It's easier to just clue her in; I don't have to listen to her bitch about it."
"I've been telling you that for years."
"And I finally listened." I joked, and she stepped in closer, wrapping her arms around my waist and prompting me to lean against her.
Instead of pulling away, I leaned into her.
We were standing in the nursery, preparing it for Gabriel to finally come home at any moment.
Beth and Mother were out grabbing lunch, and the first moment I could, I blurted out that I wanted to get married right away.
San and I still hadn't tried sex even though we'd been given all clear when I came out of the chair, but I was terrified to try anything.
The pain was still ever present, but I'd learned to live with it rather than let it keep me from living my life.
"How much time do you think we have?" She purred, and I kissed her lips.
"Not nearly enough, but when we get married, we'll rent a room, and you can ride my face for as long as you want, Princess."
"It's been an eternity, and that's what you want first?"
"Sure do."
"Say less."
"How on Earth did Maribel put this together so fast?" I asked Antonio as we sat in the church's sanctuary.
While my attendance at church had been terrible over the years, my mother moved to Philly and started attending weekly, most of the time taking San and Beth with her.
When I was out of the chair, I had even attended. Never did I think that Judy becoming close to the church elders would allow me to marry Santana.
I had thought she'd pick a judgmental church like the one we went to growing up, but she had intentionally chosen an affirming congregation.
"Maribel can't take all the credit. Judy had a lot to do with this."
"What about Santana?"
"Nope. After the barn wedding, my daughter wisely chose to let her mother make all the decisions."
"Well, I love it."
"Good."
We had come to the church for rehearsal, but San was running late because she wanted to go to a meeting first, which left me sitting with Antonio while Beth entertained the mothers.
"So, I take my MCAT in May, any advice?"
"Is this your first time?"
"I took them at Yale. I did really well. I'm taking them again because it's been a while I wanted to make sure I still wanted this. Getting Beth back sidetracked my plans. I got a master's instead because I wanted to be around for her."
"And now you have Gabriel, too, but you're still choosing to take them?"
"Santana won't let me put this off. I didn't tell her I'd already taken them. My professors said that you should take them a year before you plan to go to med school, so that's my intention."
"Good. The longer you are away from school, the harder it is to take tests like the MCAT. I'm glad you're getting it done. How's your study been?"
"Great, my practice exams are stellar."
"Then what advice do you need?"
"Med school. Where did you go?"
"Columbia."
"Oh."
"It's a great program, but navigating New York with all the baggage Santana has, I worry it may not be the best place for your family."
"Along with being too close to Brittany."
"She's in Boston."
"I know, still too close for me."
"So what were you thinking?"
"USC, UCLA, Baylor."
"All great schools."
"Asha and Vanessa want me to come to Baltimore."
"Is that what you want?"
"No."
"Well, then, I guess you're going west."
"But when? Santana still has two years of school left."
"Have you discussed it with her?"
"No."
"Maybe you should."
"What happens if I end up in LA and she decides to stay in Philly?"
"I think you'll make it work, but you said you wanted to dedicate a year to your health and taking care of the baby."
"I do."
"At that point, she'll have a year left, which will be much easier to navigate than two."
"And what if she drops out or decides to transfer?" I asked, afraid of his answer.
"While I don't like the idea of her dropping out again, I'd understand if she decided to transfer. At least that way, she's finishing."
I had a sinking feeling that I knew what San would do, and I wasn't sure anyone would like it. She'd felt stifled by school for months but had been trying to mask her frustration, but as well as she knew me, I knew her.
If I gave her an opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom, I knew she'd take it.
That's why I would let her make her own decision and support her just as much as she supported me.
School wasn't for everyone.
I knew that, but the pressure of being a finisher like her parents weighed on San.
Hopefully, once we were married, that wouldn't be such a burden.
SANTANA'S POV
I wanted things to be different this time around.
Last time, Brittany basically planned everything, right down to our guest list...all I got to pick out was my dress, and so this time...I wanted to have full control. I wanted to feel like I had a choice in all of this.
She proposed, but I wanted to set up the wedding. However, I didn't trust myself to ruin things, so I gave Mami and Judy a list of things I absolutely did not want. They took the lead, with a few minor additions from Beth.
And it was different from the start. I asked Papi to officiate the wedding even though we were in a church, Judy insisted that I needed to at least let the minister pray first.
I was wearing a white tux and the best fuck me pumps I could find, which I was going to stand at the top of the aisle in because, I'd be damned if I walked down the aisle with anyone other than my wife.
God, I love the sound of that...Quinn Fabray...my wife.
Yes!
I feel like I'm winning for the first time since I decided to pursue my happiness.
I could feel tears coming...and since the last thing I wanted was to ruin my makeup...I turned my face into a scowl and looked straight ahead, past the rows of people and towards the aisle that they created.
Beth changed into her own little tuxedo and was practically strutting up the aisle towards me with a huge grin on her face, and I couldn't help but smile back because, in just a few minutes, I'd officially be able to call myself her Mami legally. It was an honor...I'd come so far from hating Quinn and thinking she'd have a lizard baby.
I recently told Beth that story, and when she changed her smile, stuck out her tongue, and curled up her fingers into claws, I couldn't help but laugh out loud.
And it made her smile even bigger.
"Good. Mama doesn't need to see your angry eyebrows." Beth teased, and I couldn't help but let the tears fall.
The music started to play, nothing dramatic...just something I had cooked up in the studio but...God help me...the music was starting, which meant that Quinn was really on her way...
It's happening.
All of my planning with Beth and my parents is coming down to this moment...
The chime of the wedding march began...with a little bit of a remix that I threw in...of course, and everyone stood up.
My heart began to race, and when I saw that first glimpse of white lace...my mouth went dry.
Sweet Lord, she was...my breath was gone, and I stood there, tears soaking my face...my makeup went to shit, but I didn't even care because she was looking right at me and smiling so beautifully.
Q had been working hard to only need one crutch for the ceremony, and when I saw her standing at the end of the aisle, draped in the lace gown of her dreams, I knew that she was crying because she'd be able to walk to me.
It's all she wanted, and I had pushed her as safely as I could towards her desire.
I bit my bottom lip and felt a hand slide into mine.
Beth squeezed my hand and mumbled something that I didn't quite catch because I was too busy being awestruck.
When Quinn finally made it a few feet away, Beth let go of my hand and walked to her Mama with her hand out.
Flashes went off as Beth escorted her mother up to the altar.
"Who gives this woman away?" Papi said from just behind me.
"I do!" Beth said confidently, tears in her eyes.
We were just a family of saps.
Great!
BETH'S POV!
Mama looked like an angel, and Santana looked like a big old baby!
She's supposed to be the tough one, but she's crying worse than the Babe.
But when Mama looks at her, it's like Santana hung her moon, and I'm okay with sharing that honor.
They look like the little people on top of a cake, only they are so much prettier.
And now, she will be my Mami for real.
She promised to fix what she broke with Mama, and I'm so proud of her.
My eyes were so watery that I could barely pay attention as my soon-to-be Abuelo talked to them about what marriage meant.
"Marriage is a commitment. It is not something to enter in lightly because of an energy exchange."
"Santana." Some people coughed into their hands, and she looked around with a glare.
And I couldn't help but laugh...but she didn't glare at me. Instead, she stuck out her tongue and winked.
"Now, in lieu of vows, the couple decided to speak from the heart about their intentions before the official vows. So who would like to start?"
"I will," Mama said, surprising Santana, but I wasn't surprised. Mama is always prepared, no matter what.
"Okay, Quinn...go for it."
"Santana, there is never a day that goes by that I am not surprised by your spirit, your love, and your loyalty. There isn't another person alive...other than Beth...that matches my flawlessness like you can. You step up where I falter and call me out when I'm wrong. I am vowing to always give you the best that I have, the best that I am, and to do nothing but hold your hand through it all. I love you today, tomorrow, and always."
Mama was crying now, but she was still smiling as she waited for Santana to talk.
But instead, she held her hand out to me, and I thought she needed one of the tissues she'd asked me to hold.
So I pulled a tissue from my pocket and tried to hand it to her, but she shook her head.
"Your hand...can I have it?"
So I stepped closer and took her hand. It was sweaty, but I didn't make a big deal.
She was nervous.
And then she knelt down and looked at me, a smile on her face.
"Hey, kiddo."
"Hey." My voice squeaked because what was she doing? This wasn't what we planned.
"I'm not just marrying your Mama, but I'm also hoping that I can be your Mami too...so I wanted to let you know that I promise to love you, your brother and your Mama with my everything. I promise to always be honest with you and never forget that in everything, you come first. I promise to stay sober and present so that you and I can keep having amazing adventures and so that your Mama never has to worry about anything. I promise to be your best friend, no matter what. I love you. Okay?"
I couldn't talk. There was a rock in my throat as I nodded, and then, even though everyone was watching, I threw my arms around her and kissed her cheek.
This was so crazy, so perfect.
QUINN'S POV
When she knelt, I looked over at Antonio, and he shrugged, so I turned my attention to her, looking straight into Beth's eyes and making her vows to my daughter...our daughter.
She still held onto my hand as she talked to Beth, and with every promise, she gave my hand a little squeeze.
When she finally stood up and looked at me, I wanted to kiss her so badly, but I just smiled instead.
"How was that for flawless?" She said, her eyes bright and playful.
I lifted my hand and cupped her cheek.
"Perfectly flawless."
"Good."
Antonio cleared his throat while Maribel and Mother sniffled from just behind me.
"Rings?" he said, and Beth dug into her pocket, pulled out two shiny bands, looked inside them and then handed one to Santana and one to me.
"Quinn, take Santana's left hand and repeat after me."
"I, Quinn, take you, Santana, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to love, honor, and respect from this day forward."
"I, Quinn, take you, Santana, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to love, honor, and respect flawlessly from this day forward...no matter what." I added as I slid the diamond band onto her finger.
"And Tata," She glared, and he snickered, using the moment to wipe a stray tear away. "Repeat after me, I, Santana, take you, Quinn, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to love, honor, and respect from this day forward. "
"I, Santana, take you, Quinn, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to love, honor, and respect from this day forward, flawlessly." She winked, a slight shake in her voice.
"Great...so uh..." Antonio looked at the two of us as we held hands and then said, "Do you take each other to have and hold, richer or poorer, sickness and in health?"
"I do." I said.
"Absolutely, I do." Santana said, squeezing my hands.
"Then, by the power vested in me, by God and the internet, I now pronounce you flawless wives. Go ahead and kiss, but keep it PG...there's a kid watching." He joked, but Santana, my WIFE, didn't seem to hear him as she pulled my face close and crashed her lips against mine.
MAY
SANTANA'S POV
Beth and Judy sat on either side of me, each squeezing my hands at differing degrees as we waited for our girl to walk across that stage. I heard a gurgle and checked under the blanket that covered the sleeping baby that was in the carrier that was strapped to me.
Gabe rested peacefully in the noisy room, so used to the constant music at home that this graduation had been nothing out of the ordinary for him.
And then it happened...
"L. Quinn Lopez, MS, Clinical Psychology. Magna Cum Laude." Quinn actually cringed...it was barely perceptible to anyone who didn't know her fake smile, but of course, I noticed, and when I glanced at Judy, I could tell that she had noticed, too.
But we still hooted and hollered, clapping until she stepped back off the stage and returned to her row using only one crutch.
She glanced back at us and winked, I winked back, and she grinned for real this time before turning back around.
It was a beautiful moment quickly broken by a smell and then a whimper.
"Peeewwwweewww!" Beth said, waving her hand in front of her nose dramatically. "I think he got excited too!" She said, taking her dramatic hand and pinching her nose with it.
I guess that's my cue then! I said as I reached for the diaper bag, but Judy took it from my hands.
"I'll take him, I wanted to be here for the stage cross, but the rest is a snooze. I'd rather spend time with Mr. Handsome."
And so off Gabe went with the savior of our sanity.
Judy put Mary Poppins to shame.
It was only because of her that Quinn and I were able to finish school with top marks. Granted, even though she was disappointed, Quinn's near-perfect grade point average was a bit higher than mine. I didn't do too bad myself.
A year ago, I had only dreamed of pulling a B average, but now it's a reality.
I haven't felt this proud of myself since deciding to put myself through rehab.
Things were looking up, and knowing that Quinn's in my corner has made everything much more exciting.
"I don't need to do this now, S I can wait a few months. It's not like I'm going to med school this year."
Quinn was drunk.
The night before the biggest test of her life, I came back from N.A. to her guzzling wine.
I took the glass from her and sat it just out of her reach.
"What's this really about?"
She turned her bleary eyes to me.
"I got in." She whispered.
"What?"
"I aced my MCAT two years ago, San. I applied to UCLA on a whim, just to see if they'd honor my scores, and I got in."
I felt like she'd punched me in the gut.
"What? Why didn't you tell me?"
She shrugged and blew an errant strand of hair from her face. I leaned closer and brushed it behind her ear.
"Married one month, and I'm already lying to you." She hiccupped and I had a brief flashback to Britt, and I felt my heart sink a bit.
"Do you want to go?"
"Huh?"
"To LA, is that what you want? Because we can make it work, Q."
"No, we can't! We have two kids, San. You're in school for another two years."
"Fuck school. I can stay home with the kids and work on my music, maybe get a job on the side."
Her laugh was cold and harsh.
"I knew you'd quit the first chance you got."
"Whoa, what the fuck, Luce. Why are you being like this?"
I guess we were having our first fight, even though I knew it was fruitless to argue with a drunk person.
"Because I'm fucking terrified that I got in. Asha told me that my scores counted still, I didn't believe her, and she dared me to do it. So I did."
"When would you start?"
"August."
"Of this year?"
"Yes."
"In two months?"
"Yes."
"Wow. At least tell me you haven't been sitting on this for months."
"I applied in February."
"And you heard back that fast?"
"I have an impressive resume, and I'm a legacy. Russell and Fran went to UCLA."
I was furious but then thought about how Britt forced me to give up modeling, and I knew that I couldn't stand in Quinn's way.
"Are you drinking just to get up the nerve to tell me?"
"Obviously."
"Who else knows about this?"
"No one else. I got the notice today. I've been waiting for you to get home."
"Where's Judy? Where are the kids?"
"Bible study with Gabriel. Jake took Beth to gymnastics. Why? Do you want to spank me?"
"No, right now, all I feel is rage, Quinn. I hate that you didn't trust me with this. I feel betrayed, and rather than get upset, you are going to sober up, and then we are going to discuss this like married people."
Her face got serious then.
"San, please don't be mad."
"Too late. There's nothing we can do about that. Instead, I want to tackle our next steps together when you're sober."
"Okay." She squeaked. She was crying now, and I felt my anger dissipate.
"Why are you crying?"
"I'm a bad wife." She blubbered.
When did she become a sappy drunk? I'd prefer her angry than sad, any day.
"You're not a bad wife. Trust me, I'd know since I had one."
Just the mention of Brittany made her face change to rage.
Ah, there she is, my little angry drunk.
"How fucking dare you bring her up!"
"I'm going to do us both a favor and put this wine out of your reach. Do you need help to the bathroom?"
"Fuck you!" She said, pushing to her feet without her crutch and stumbling.
I grabbed it and shoved it into her hand. "You can be pissed at me all you want, but don't fuck up your back."
"Fine!" she said as she attempted the slowest storm-off in history, and I let her.
I hovered outside the bathroom while she cried in the shower, and when she came out wrapped in a towel while holding herself up on the wall, I knew she couldn't grab the crutch.
"Did you drop it?"
"Yeah."
"Want my help?"
"Please?" She squeaked.
"Say less."
Q was quiet while I got her changed into pajamas and brushed her hair.
While she'd been showering, I sent Judy money and told her to grab dinner on her way to Jake's.
I'd bought us an hour, and I was going to take advantage of it.
While Q sat on the bed, I knelt in front of her and gingerly pushed her knees apart.
Her tears slowly tracked over her cheeks as she cupped my face.
"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you."
"That's not why I'm upset."
"It's not?"
"I can get over you not telling me about the MCAT. We weren't even together when you took them. I'm proud of your ambition. What upsets me is the fact that you thought you needed to get drunk to talk to me about it."
"Oh."
"We play with our cards up, all trust, Q. I tell you everything, I tell you how much I hate school…and you talk to me about it. I tell you how much I miss the friendship I had with B…and even then, you commiserate with me. I need you to trust that I'd do the same for you."
"I do trust you."
"You trust to the capacity of your comfort level. I need you to trust me more than that."
"I'm sorry."
"I know."
"I don't have to go. I can put it off another year or two."
"No."
"No? Why not?"
"You love school, learning is your favorite thing, Q. I just wanted to be famous, and then I just wanted to sing, and now all I want is to be happy and sober."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that I can go back to school at any time if I need to, but it doesn't feel like it has a purpose. Do you know how many people in the entertainment industry don't have degrees?"
"A lot?"
"Exactly. In L.A. I can do something with what I already have in my portfolio, and I can do it while being a full-time mom to our kids. Let me do this for us, Q. You can focus on your dream of becoming a doctor, and I can make sure that you still have something to come home to."
"Are you serious?"
"I'm serious."
"just like that?"
"Yes, Luce, just like that."
"What about your parents?"
"They'll understand."
She chewed her lip as she thought this through while I pressed gentle kisses to her thighs.
When she buried her hands in my hair, I leaned in closer and kissed her panty-covered curls.
"I need you." She whispered.
I looked up into her eyes and could see the lust.
We'd been so careful about her back, but we both wanted to go harder.
But she'd lied.
And I needed her to know that wasn't cool with me.
I pulled back, so she was forced to drop her hands from my hair.
"You still lied, Luce."
"But you said we'd go."
"And we will, tonight though, you're not getting any of this. I'm not rewarding your deceit. That would set a terrible precedent, don't you think?"
"You sound like me." She grumbled.
"I learned from the best." I winked and then pressed a kiss to her forehead.
And she knew better than to argue.
JUNE
QUINN'S POV
"Do you have the list?" Santana asked me as she cradled Gabriel in her arms. Her feet were on the coffee table as she fed him.
I patted my pockets and pulled out a very detailed list that Beth had written before she left for the summer.
There were five items (only because I limited her), listed in order of importance that were definite must-haves for buying our new house in L.A.
ABSOLUTE MUST HAVE'S FOR OUR DREAM HOUSE
1. FOUR BEDROOMS SO WE CAN MAKE ONE A LIBRARY
2. GREAT SCHOOL
3. A YARD FOR THE BABE TO PLAY IN WITH GOOD TREES FOR A TREE HOUSE.
4. KIDS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
5. A POOL
"I don't know, Love...I don't think we are going to be able to afford a house that has all of the things on this list."
"Papi already told me to not let you back out of buying a great house."
"I just don't like taking money from them. With Russell...there was always a catch. It's hard to imagine that they just WANT to do this with no strings attached."
"Now that they have sold Papi's house in Lima and they've released my trust fund completely, I think we'll be okay, Q."
"I was serious about paying him back...once I finish residency and I am making better money. He can expect a large amount of money." Santana chuckled and shook her head as she made silly faces at Gabriel, who was giggling at her. "Why are you laughing?"
"Because, it would just serve us better to make sure they are taken care of in retirement, send them on trips, they'll appreciate that much more. Any money that you try to give them will always be returned. Trust me."
"Ugh, seriously?"
"Just give in, Q. You're fighting a losing battle."
"No." I grumbled and she laughed even harder, and Gabriel mimicked her.
"Mama is a big old grumbly pants, isn't she?" She cooed, and it seemed that our son was in agreement. "Send the list to the realtor. She's already waiting and Papi has already been in contact with her."
"Are you kidding me?" I said, looking over at her, shocked
"Nope, if it's any consolation, we still have to furnish the place all on our own."
I looked around at my furniture and rolled my eyes.
"We have furniture."
"Enough to fill up the house that Beth is describing?"
"Ugh...fine. I'll text the realtor, but just promise me that even if they are bankrolling it, we will be the ones to make the final decision on which house we choose?"
"Done."
"Thank you!"
"Anything for you, sugar tits."
I glared at her, and she winked suggestively.
"Seriously?"
"The babe will be asleep any minute, and then you and I are going to bed too."
"It's four in the afternoon."
"And our flight leaves at ten, so we've got plenty of time to take a nap." She waggled her eyebrows, and I just threw my hands up.
"Fine...I'm not going to argue...just know that you'll be doing all the work."
"Oh baby, that's just how I like it."
"Say less."