"I can't believe you called me for a date, Senpai!" Sakura seemed surprisingly happy.

Suspiciously happy even. Yato wouldn't question it though. Questioning Skadi when the same issue popped up ended up creating more trouble than solving it anyways.

Yato smiled. "I don't know why that sounds so unbelievable. Spending time with you is always a blessing." Though that wasn't the only issue why he had called her for a date.

Luvia had called her a bomb that had to be dealt with as fast as possible, and so he was trying to disarm this metaphorical bomb. Things were so dire that he even invited her through a message, something very risky.

Well... Yato didn't actually know why she was a bomb, but Luvia was his advisor for now. So he would follow what she said.

Sakura let out a dreamy sigh. "If you say so Senpai..." Yeah, this was definitely suspicious! Especially since her eyes looked pretty empty!

But he would just have to add some life back to it. "Okay then Sakura! Let's go!" He would need to lead her.

Fuyuki was a pretty lame city. It didn't have many dating spots that weren't just... dine here! Which was admittedly a problem. However, something strange was happening...

Even though they were just walking through a park together... Sakura seemed immensely happy!

"Look at that bird Senpai! Isn't it super cute...?" It was a generic bird. Though Yato admittedly didn't know much about birds.

Yato hesitantly nodded. "Yeah..." Like all other birds. "Do you wanna... like... feed them?" Did Sakura have a strange appreciation for birds that he didn't know much about?

The truth is that he didn't know too much about Sakura in general. He knew she had an ex-boyfriend that she probably hated, that she used to be a cute kuudere, but slowly changed that... and that was pretty much it.

Maybe these dates would be good after all.

Sakura clasped her hands together. "That would be wonderful... but we don't have any food with us." That was true... "Also, feeding the animals is against the rules of the park." Yato didn't know if that applied to generic birds.

Even if it did though. "Eh, don't worry. I'm a Campione, so I'm above rules." Yep.

Sakura muttered to herself. "Besides the weird ones you arbitrarily impose on yourself?" H-huh? "C'mon Senpai, we shouldn't break the rules! And even if we did, there is still the matter of food." She changed the topic so quickly!

Yato grinned. "Well, there is a easy way to obtain food..." He pointed at a random bush. "Hey Caren, can you go get us popcorn or something? I'll give you the cash for it." He trusted her enough to know she wouldn't run off with his credit card.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking abou—."

Caren stepped out of the bush as if it was the most natural thing in the world. "My apologies my lord, but I don't want to leave the two of you unsupervised." She glared at Sakura. "Mostly because of you..." The conversation they had was still fresh in her mind.

She knew Sakura was... insane. And so there's no way she would simply let her go on a date with Yato without doing something to help him. Especially since after the marriage issue Sakura had become even more unstable than usual.

Yato sighed. "Really...? Ugh, let's just go all together then." He would feed those damn birds even if it was that last thing he ever did! It was a matter of pride now!

Sakura interjected. "Let us not!" Her smile had quickly disappeared as she glared at Caren. "What are you even doing here!? Trying to ruin my date with Senpai!? Are you jealous!?"

Caren didn't seem shocked at all by her outburst. "You go into hysterics very easily." She cleared her throat. "Worry not, I am not here to ruin any date. I'm here to make sure this date goes well, in fact."

Sakura's eye twitched. "And I'm supposed to believe you of all people...?"

Yato suddenly pat Sakura's shoulder. "Hey, it's alright. Caren has been following us for a long time now, and she hasn't done anything wrong just yet!" Caren wasn't the troublesome sort anyway.

She could talk big about raping people or whatever, but she had behaved well every since he met her. At this point Yato could only assume she had some serious chuuni tendencies, instead of being evil. Which was hot in its own way.

"Senpai... for just how long has she been following us?" Why didn't he tell her!?

Yato shrugged. "I don't know, she came with you." It was part of the reason why he had thought this could be a trap. "My Campione instincts warned me of her. Pretty nifty." There's no way a simple human could hide from a Campione.

Caren smiled. "Very impressive indeed. Though if Sakura wishes to know more details, I have been following her ever since she left the house."

Sakura grit her teeth. "Why...? What are you trying to do...? How did you even find out about this to stalk me in the first place?"

Caren tilted her head. "You weren't exactly subtle about it. I imagine many others also noticed your behavior." Especially her Servant, who was always watching her. "It also doesn't help that Caster and Edelfelt recently disappeared."

She hummed. "As for why I followed you... just to make sure you don't do anything foolish." She started spinning in place. "And for no other reason. No other reason at all." It was then that Yato noticed something curious.

Caren typically tended to dress the same everyday, always wearing her nun clothing. Right now though, she was actually wearing something different, as if she was dressed for something special...

She also stopped her spinning, and was staring af him... as if expecting something...

Sakura pouted. "It's not happening. Senpai isn't gonna say anything."

Caren's face showed no emotion. "I wasn't expecting anything." She definitely was! Yato could tell by her eyes that she was!

So he had to do something... "Your clothes look cute." Surely a compliment couldn't hurt?

Caren glowed. "Oh really? I didn't notice. Thank you." Yato had a feeling he did just what he needed to do.

Sakura however, seemingly got even more mad. "Are you here to steal my date Caren!? Is that what you're here to do!?" Ah, theft. Now that his Soviet Harem utopia had ended, that would become more and more common.

Caren simply looked away. The truth is that yes, stealing her date had been a goal of hers... but a very minimal one! She was a selfless woman who sacrificed everything for the masses, but if Yato happened to think she was cuter, then it couldn't be helped.

Yato interjected. "Nobody is going to steal any dates, Sakura. Especially since there would be no point... I'm going on a date with everyone eventually." Actually, maybe since Caren wasn't freaking out, he could skip hers?

That sounded really mean, so probably not.

Finally understanding reached Sakura's eyes. "So Senpai is going to date everyone..." That... didn't sting as much as she thought it would.

Since Caster and Luvia had left, she already had her suspicions, which softened the blow. Besides, at least she was picked before her sister... Especially since she wasn't expecting to be picked at all.

Sakura knew that the moment Yato had to get rid of a few members of the harem, she would be the first one to go. The only thing she had to her name was Saber, but even then the Servant wasn't cooperative.

Yato put his hands on his hips, and proudly exclaimed. "Indeed, I shall date everyone! Like a legendary hero reclaiming his kingdom!" Like Simba, but... well, it was very different from Simba.

Caren clapped. "Amazing. I shall be looking forward to my date then." She would also make sure to not snitch on him to the other girls. Who know what they would do.

Who knows what the True Magician would do...

Sakura glared at her. "So, are you going to leave now?" Then she could go back to spending time with Senpai. In their amazing date, even looking at generic birds was fun.

Caren nodded. "Yes. I shall return to the bushes. Please call upon me if help is needed." She sighed. "Unless it's something very physically draining of course, I am carrying his child." Yato would have to find a date that didn't force her too much.

"Just go home!" Sakura didn't even know what she was supposed to do in this situation. "Don't you see you're bothering us!?" Well, bothering her. As usual, Yato was okay with anything.

Actually... he wasn't okay with this.

So he stepped up. "Why are you guys even fighting?" Normally he would let this continue. He couldn't control people's feelings, and it was okay if not all harem members liked each other, but...

That was back in the days of the Soviet Harem, where everything was perfectly balanced! Nowadays, a fight like this one could be the end of his harem! So he couldn't just stand back and watch.

Caren crossed her arms. "I actually haven't fought anyone, thank you." She was just stalking them. That's all.

Sakura grit her teeth. "Are you trying to put the blame for this on me now? How shameless can someone be?"

Caren raised an eyebrow. "You should be the one answering that question."

Yato immediately got between them. "Yeah, there's definitely something going on here. Something not good." Since when did these two dislike each other!? "Which means it's councilor Yato time. You two should make-up and kiss."

Caren joined her hands in prayer. "A beautiful solution, my lord." Yato did not know who she was praying to. He also did not want to find out.

Sakura however, seemed a lot less enthusiastic about his order. "I... if you're ordering..." Which meant his solution wasn't gonna work.

He couldn't just accept one of them faking being friendly with each other, while they secretly kept on with their grudge. Now that he had decided to evolve the harem into a new form, corruption had to be weeded out early!

A sigh left his mouth. "You know what? Forget what I just said. Let's just keep going, because this is now a Caren and Sakura date." Essentially, he was double timing.

Caren nodded. "Very well. That is also an acceptable solution." Really, she was happy with any scrap her beloved threw her way.

And so was Sakura, but... "Alright..." She had to hold back a frustrated groan. In the end, Caren really had stolen her date! At least to a certain extent.

Their walk through the park started yet again... It was pretty much the same, though this time Caren would actually be the one to call Yato's attention to something or another.

At least she was doing that, until she suddenly stopped. "I know I have been watching you two, but this isn't exactly what I expected from a Campione. I must admit."

Sakura clenched her fist, but forced a smile, even though she knew Caren could see right through her. "What do you mean? Isn't this nice?" She was actually going to kill the girl if she started complaining about the date as well.

Surprisingly enough however, Yato agreed with her. "Yeah, I know. Fuyuki is a pretty meh city." It was a miracle that they even had a park! Considering the state of the other one...

He continued. "I thought about picking Sakura up bridal style and carrying her to another city..." The girl thought that sounded amazing! "But I'm pretty sure the wind resistance would tear out her skin due to the speed or something." So it was impossible, essentially.

Yato could only hope the next god to attack him had some teleportation based authority... surely he would get attacked soon as well? Campione typically tended to fight another god pretty soon after they killed their first one.

Ah. That had happened to him. He just didn't kill the god.

Caren hummed. "Right, but that isn't what I'm referring to..." Oh? "It's just that... as a Campione, do you really enjoy such simplistic walks?" For her, Yato was a bit of an enigma.

She had been taught that Campione were brutal beasts that cared about nothing, except their own pleasure, a mold which certainly fit Yato at times of course. However, he also seemed to weird boundaries that he saw fit respecting.

The confusion she was feeling was her own fault of course, Campione were not human... anymore, and so trying to make them fit a mold was foolish, but Caren couldn't help herself. Once she had been picked by the Church for this, she had expected to treat this as a sacrifice.

Which she was willing to do. Caren would not mind at all sacrificing herself for the greater good. It had been what she had been doing way before she had met Yato anyway.

Yato put a hand to his chin. "I... Sure... The scenery doesn't matter much though, as long as you guys are around." He tilted his head. "Besides, this is Sakura's... and your date. So you guys are my priority right now." Though Caren would probably enjoy burning orphanages more or something.

Caren suddenly blushed. "I see." In the end, she ended up liking Yato.

It was probably because of her expectations of him had been subverted so suddenly. He very much did not treat her as a sacrifice, even though she was begging that of him

Sakura pouted. "Now that has been settled, can we keep going?" Caren really was stealing her date! And right under her nose too!

Yato nodded. "Sure..." But then he remembered why he had turned this into a date with two girls i the first place. "Actually, let's have a talk. I want to hear it straight out... why do you two dislike each other?"

He continued. "Originally I was hoping that just spending some time together would fix things, but clearly that isn't the case. There's something more happening here, isn't it?" So he had to confront them directly.

Sakura once again put a fake smile on her face. "Of course not, Sen—." But Caren cut her off.

"I do not dislike her. I don't think I dislike any person in the harem, my lord." Besides Aoko Aozaki perhaps, but even then that wouldn't be an issue as long as Yato did not abandon them.

Sure, she had different values than most of the girls... but that did not mean she disliked them, because Caren Hortensia tended to not dislike people in the first place. Forgiveness and all that.

It also helped that many of them weren't truly combative in their daily lives. Sometimes a conflict of some sort would rise up, but seeing as nobody had been stabbed yet, it was clear that those conflicts were fairly shallow, with few exceptions.

She continued. "The only problem here is that Sakura is a ticking time bomb. I do not trust her myriad of masks, and so, to protect the harem, I shall keep watch of her and the knife she sneaked onto her bag." Ah.

Yato wanted to talk back, but she had called Sakura a ticking time bomb... just like Luvia did. So clearly something was going on here.

Sakura sputtered. "I did not bring a knife with me!" She really didn't! Now Caren was just making things up!

Caren shrugged. "If you say so. I was just guessing due to your behavior." Oi. "Leaving that aside, you did not deny the mask you constantly wear. It's only natural someone would be wary of that."

There were plenty of... dangerous people in the harem. The first that came to mind being Skadi, who looked upon them as if they were worthless bugs. She did not hide her distate for them however, so dealing with her was easy.

Sakura was another matter entirely. How was someone supposed to know if they had gotten on her nerves when she was constantly faking everything? Caren did not like it, it was a issue that had to be fixed.

"O-of course I did not deny it! I was too occupied denying your other outrageous claim, which as you yourself admitted, was fake!" Sakura felt like she was dealing with a malicious demon.

Well, that's how she felt most of the time she was interacting with people.

Yato however... simply hummed. "Sakura... I do find it weird how you changed so quickly from what you used to be." People could change of course, but it had been really fast.

Maybe it was something that had always been inside? Akin to how Rin was actually super deredere?

Sakura shivered. "Senpai, I...!"

"You know it's okay, right?" Ah, he really had become a pretty incompetent harem master. "I won't get mad at you if you want to wear a mask and hide your true self... just..." He closed his eyes, and nodded to himself. "Just don't be mad at Caren for it."

"Or at the others. Or at yourself. Be mad at me." In the end he had made a mistake.

He had been making tons of mistakes, and now they were blowing up on his face. He had become too comfortable with the power of the Soviet Harem, and now that that legendary institution had fallen, he had to step-up.

Sakura looked away. "I can't be mad at you, Senpai..." She definitely could. He still remembered how she clearly wanted to snap at him a few seconds ago.

But fine, he would just have to push it a bit more... "Sakura... okay then. However, I do want to know something. Why wear a mask in the first place? Or more importantly... who made you wear that mask?" Was it him?

In that case, even though he was a Campione, he would have to apologize.

Sakura sighed. "I... Okay Senpai. I'll tell you."

AN: One day I want to write a chapter where all the character's names are switched. A tribute to Fate/Stay Randomizer.