QL, Wigtown Wanderers, Beater 1, Finals Round 2. Theme: We all have different reasons for forgetting to breathe. (Andrea Gibson). Prompts: [word] passing. [Phrase] In my heart.
Word Count: 1184
Beta: Bailey, Aya
We all have different reasons for forgetting to breathe. For a lot of people it's finding their soulmate. There were many times I observed Ron turning bright red or blue because of the lack of oxygen. For others, it's finding their enemy. Draco in particular was fun to watch as he mentioned 'telling his father'. For me it was the last second of my life as I saw my brother's reaction. We both knew it was the end. I suppose I didn't even need the breath - what good would it do me now? As my eyes found his, I didn't think about attempting to draw a breath, in fact, that was nowhere on my mind. All I thought about was trying to convey to my brother, my twin, my other half, that everything was going to be okay. He would live on. He could do this without me. It would take him time to realise that, but George had the time. I, however, had less than a second to reminisce over everything that has happened in my 19 years of life.
The myths were right – when you die, your life really does flash before your eyes.
The earliest memory I have passes by in the blink of an eye. It's a blurry image of George laughing. He was laughing at me, and I at him. The simplicity of it seems to capture the true nature of my relationship with him. The memories seem to flash past, fleeting photographs and snippets of life, passing quickly before my eyes. The common denominator in them all is George. It confirms what I already knew ‒ that our lives were irrevocably and inextricably intertwined, that my life really did revolve around his. The majority of times his face appears, there's a huge smile. My twin had always been the most important part of my life, so it wasn't a surprise that he was at the forefront of my thoughts at the last moment of my life. There was a level of calmness that filled me as I saw countless images of George smiling and laughing through the years. I know that it will be difficult for him to find joy after I'm gone ‒ I would be the same if our roles were switched. But he would learn to do it again, in time. My only regret is that I wouldn't get to see him do it anymore firsthand.
A few memories slowed long enough for them to stand out to me. Charlie saying goodbye before he left to work with dragons; Bill sneaking just me out to go flying; walking up to the stool to be sorted by myself; dancing with Angelina at the Yule Ball; talking to Ginny about her feelings for Harry and in the end encouraging her to go for it. They were all things I experienced alone, things that helped me become the person I am ‒ or, was. They helped me develop my own individual identity over the years. And I'm sure George had similar times when he was alone, too. We knew we wouldn't be joined at the hip our whole lives, but neither of us imagined the other just not being there. Death had never been a consideration in either of our minds; even living apart was sometimes too much to fathom.
As the second nearly ticked, the images flashed quicker, but they were more vivid, more profound. Staying up all night with George to create the dragon fireworks; George making the worst 'holey' joke ever; George and I pranking together.
Finally, my whole family flashed before me. Every single Christmas and birthday. The breakfasts, dinners, and picnics spent together. The feasts that Mum made with spices and love. Having food fights with all of my brothers. Being scolded by Mum for messing about or sneaking out. Trying to work out the function of many Muggle items with Dad. Idolising Bill and Charlie. Doing everything possible to annoy Percy. Helping Ron to find his place and protecting Ginny as much as I could without her knowing. Family was at the core of every experience, at the centre of everything I had loved. Family was everything.
In this moment, the last ever moment I would have been alive, I was proud of who I was and the family I was born into. I was loved and had loved. They would always be in my heart, and I knew I would never be forgotten. I attempted to smile instead of breathing before the life left my body and I moved onto the next adventure – my first one away from my family.
It was only as I closed my eyes for the last time that I saw George take a breath – my final breath was pointless but I'm glad he remembered he still needed to breathe, to live. It was a comforting thought as I concluded my life as Fred Weasley.
Without any second-guessing, I knew something was wrong when I turned and saw Fred go down. It was wrong. This couldn't be happening, but as our eyes met everything around me paused. I didn't even think to breathe – who could at a time like this?
Every significant moment in my life so far has involved him. Fred and I are inseparable. The last time we were apart I lost an ear, ending a lifetime of jokes and miscalled names. Now, it looked like my twin was going to leave me forever. The wrongness of it sent a shock through my body. Twins are born together, and they should die together.
Fred's face looked weird — he wasn't smiling or laughing. Though, he didn't look scared either. He almost looked calm as he faced death alone. We had known our lives wouldn't always continue down the same path, there would be forks in the road. But this was not one we had considered, even with being in a war. I just know in my heart that I cannot go on without Fred by my side instead of in my heart. A memory is just not the same.
How could death even think about taking him away without me? I took a breath and Fred didn't. I shouldn't have taken a breath without him.
In that eternal moment, I forgot about the war, my friends, my family, everything. I barely remembered to breathe. I knew that my life from then on would always be a bit greyer without the happiest, cheekiest, and best friend I ever had.
And as much as it was a small glimmer of hope, I knew Fred would never fake his death as a prank – that would be too far. We knew where to draw the line, and this would have been beyond the pale.
I knew when he was gone. I didn't have to look at him or even glance in his direction to know it was over. I wonder if, in his final moments, Fred thought I could live without him. If so, he was dead wrong. Twins go together. Always and Forever.