Chapter 27
A Bad Day
Harry woke and began throwing up all over his bed. His body was shaking and sweating. He'd had a horrible nightmare. His eyes darted to the door as he shakily pulled himself from the messy bed. Harry stood and stared at the mess he'd made. He felt his heart pound. The room felt stifling. The door was closed again but he tried to remind himself he wasn't locked in.
Harry walked softly to the door and pulled it open a crack. He sucked in some deep breaths and turned on the light. The mess was worse then he'd thought. The bedding was covered in vomit and so was his clothing. It looked like he'd avoided getting it on the floor. The room smelt sour.
Harry waved a shaking hand over the mess on the bed and vanished it. It wasn't perfect but it was better. He did the same with his clothing. He wiped his forehead. He was really warm. He walked to the door and listened. He didn't want to wake Snape, but he needed to shower and wash his bedding. He bit his lip and cast a silencing charm at his feet.
Collecting the bedding and taking off his ruined shirt he headed down the stairs. He started the washing and cast another silencing charm. He'd turn it over as soon as it was done.
He caught sight of another bathroom and considered just showering down here. Snape hadn't said anything about it. He pushed the door open and wrinkled his nose. The bathroom was horrid. It was dusty and moldy. He could hear a faint buzzing from the curtains near the window and thought it might be Doxies. He'd learned a lot about magical pests while staying at Grimmauld.
Harry turned to look at what he guessed was a towel cupboard and heard a knocking noise. His brows furrowed. Merlin only knew what was hiding in there. He decided he'd risk the upstairs bathroom. He didn't want to wake Snape, but he'd rather deal with a grumpy Potions Master than Doxie bites in the middle of the night.
Trudging back upstairs he collected his clothing and toiletries and made his way silently to the bathroom. He stripped out of his soiled clothing and made his way into the spray of the shower. He washed quickly and got dressed.
Harry noticed a drop of blood on the floor and quickly wiped it up. It looked like it had dried. He hoped Snape hadn't seen it. Aunt Petunia hated it when he bled on the floors. He'd noticed blood on his shirt and bedding. One of the raw spots on his side must have been bleeding when he got out of the shower last night.
He still felt shaky. His side looked worse today and he wondered if the wounds had become infected. It would explain the apparent fever he now had.
Harry made his way back to his room and planned what he could do to resolve the problem. They were going to Hogwarts today. He decided he'd go to the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey would have everything he needed. He didn't want to have to explain his condition, but he would if he needed to.
Severus woke to a strange sound. What on earth was Potter doing? It sounded like he was moving furniture.
Severus groaned and climbed out of bed. The sun was barely up.
He pulled his bathrobe over his bare shoulders and stepped into his slippers. He threw open his door with a little too much force and it banged into the wall.
He shuffled across the hall and knocked on Potters door.
The sound inside stopped and then the door flew open. Severus was greeted with a slightly sweaty Potter.
"What in the name of Merlin are you doing?" Severus growled.
Potter's eyes grew wide, and he looked a little pale although his overall coloring looked flushed.
"S…Sorry, Sir." Potter gulped.
Severus just raised an eyebrow. The boy hadn't answered his question.
When Potter continued to just stand there Severus pushed the door open and stepped into the room past him.
Severus furrowed his brows. Potter had the bedding pulled off and sat on his trunk. The fitted sheet was half on. Why was the boy changing his bedding?
Severus turned to Potter and hoped he'd answer. He was not awake enough to question Potter.
"Sorry sir…I…I got too warm last night. The sheets needed washing. I…I'm really sorry for waking you." Potter stuttered out.
Severus groaned.
It was too early to deal with Potter.
"And this couldn't wait for the sun to come up?" Severus asked, looking the boy over.
He did not look well. He'd make him take a Pepper-up before they left. He didn't need Potter collapsing while they were dueling. Surely, he'd never hear the end of it from Albus.
Potter gulped.
"Sorry. I knew you wanted to leave after breakfast for the day." Pottered mumbled twisting his hands in his shirt and looking at the floor.
Severus rolled his eyes.
"Go start the coffee, Potter. I'll meet you in the kitchen." Severus grumbled as he left the room.
Severus heard some shuffling across the hall then near silent feet racing down the stairs.
He dressed quickly and once he'd been to the loo; he made his way to the kitchen.
Severus frowned.
The Coffee was made and so was breakfast. The boy was standing in that strange pose in front of the sink again and shaking like a leaf. What in the hell was going on with Potter?
There was no way the boy had eaten. He hadn't had time.
"Are you joining me?" Severus asked as he took his seat.
Potters head shot up and he looked…confused? Surely the concept of breakfast wasn't beyond his comprehension.
"I thought I was on restriction, Sir." Potter said softly.
Severus brow creased. What was the boy on about now?
"You are. You're not to leave the house on your own until Monday as we discussed last night. What does that have to do with eating breakfast?" Severus asked.
He sipped his coffee as he watched the boy fidget. He needed more caffeine to make the brat make sense.
"I can have breakfast?" Potter asked unsurely.
Severus just looked at the boy like he'd lost his mind.
"Potter it's too early for this round about conversation. Get some food and sit down. And take this. You look like you're going to faint." Severus said, holding out the Pepper-up he'd collected from the bathroom.
Potter took shaky steps forward and collected the vial from his hand and then just stared at him.
"Thank you, Sir." Potter whispered.
Severus shook his head dismissively. Then returned his focus to his breakfast. The boy made no sense at all.
Potter flitted around the kitchen and then stilled.
When Severus looked up, he noticed the boy had a bowl in his hand and was just standing there again looking at the table and then back to Severus.
"Sit Potter. I'm not writing you a formal invitation." Snape snapped.
The boy moved quickly and perched on the chair. He put his arm on the table like he was guarding his bowl. Did the brat think he was going to steal his. no doubt ,cold bowl of oatmeal?
Severus rolled his eyes and finished his coffee.
The boy ate in nibbles. It was strange. Perhaps whatever the boy was sick with was upsetting his stomach. He'd collect a stomach soother when he went back upstairs.
Harry felt so unsure. He hated living here. He knew the rules at the Dursleys. He knew the rules at Hogwarts. He had no idea what to expect here at Snape's house. The man had been all over the place. He'd done nothing but yell at him for the first few days and then yesterday he'd been almost civil and then he'd told him he needed to be punished again…But he'd not been specific. Now Snape was angry again and confusing. Harry was in trouble but also, he was supposed to eat.
Snape had given him a pepper-up and it was making him feel a little better. Although he could feel his wounds throbbing in time with his heart.
Severus stepped into the headmaster's office from the floo just before ten o'clock. He'd initially planned to just floo to his quarters but had decided against it. Potter had seen enough of his life he didn't need the boy in there as well.
A moment later Potter came tumbling out of the fireplace, landing hard on his knees. Honestly for someone so capable on a broom Severus couldn't understand how the boy could be so clumsy.
Severus watched with a bored expression as Potter picked himself up off the floor and dusted himself off.
"Good morning." Albus chimed in an all to cheery voice.
"Good morning." Severus responded.
Potter duct his head and also mumbled something Severus could only guess was also a good morning.
"Where are we to be practicing Albus?" Severus asked shortly.
Albus eyes went to Potter.
"I believe Harry can show you the way Severus." Albus answered, the twinkle in his eye shining bright.
Severus sighed. He had no interest in following the boy all over the school.
"Very well, lead the way, Potter." Severus growled.
Albus shot him with a disapproving look.
Severus chided himself. He and the boy had not had a particularly good morning. He felt like he'd already fallen back on old habits. However, He wouldn't be discouraged. He just hadn't gotten enough sleep. Hopefully, the lesson would go smoothly, and they could move on with their day.
"Yes, Sir." Potter whispered and headed for the exit.
Severus followed in a billow of robes.
They walked silently for a while before Potter spoke up.
"The room is on the seventh floor." Potter said quietly.
While Severus didn't love the idea of climbing the whole school, it was nice to have a direction.
When they reached a blank stretch of wall Severus thought he was being pranked. He watched Potter pace back and forth and thought maybe the boy was trying to come up with a next step in wasting his time.
"What are you doing Potter?" Severus growled.
However, as the words left his mouth a door appeared behind Potter. Severus raised his eyebrow. The castle was full of surprises, but he had not yet stumbled across this one.
Potter opened the door and walked in. Severus followed and was surprised by the room they now found themselves in.
It was open and was equipped with practice dummies as well as what looked like Defense books. Severus was surprised to see a small smile on the boy's face.
"How did you come across this room Potter?" Severus asked.
Potter turned to him with a serious look on his face.
"We needed a place for the D.A. to practice. This room shows it's self when you need it." Potter explained.
Severus hummed and looked around. So, this is where the brats had been hiding out.
Potter looked pensive. Like he wasn't sure what would come of that admission. Severus thought it would not be a good start to their lesson to point out how foolish it was to be practicing like that without any supervision. That he was once again breaking the rules.
Severus shook the thoughts from his head.
"Very well, let's begin. We will start by simply blocking unfriendly spells. Proper duels are not what you will find in combat Potter. I will cast stinging hexes at you. We will move about the room, and you will block or dodge the ones you can. When I have an idea of where you are at with that, we will work on improvements."
Severus saw Potter set his jaw and was surprised to see anger light behind his eyes. Severus figured the 'boy wonder' thought he was above learning the basics. He was pleased to see a little of the old Potter shine through. Even if the boy still looked ill. He watched Potter take a deep breath and roll his shoulders back.
"All right, Professor." Potter said with a nod.
They stood a little distance away from one another and Severus raised his wand.
When Potter did not present his wand, Severus decided he would show the boy he always needed to be prepared. He cast his first stinging hex expecting it to surprise him. However, when Potter simply moved his hand and cast not only a wandless but also wordless shield Severus was the one who was shocked.
Potter and his classmates wouldn't start learning about either concept until the fall term. How on earth was Potter already capable of both? Severus stepped forward and cast again. Potter started moving and blocking.
The two danced around the room for close to an hour. Every time Severus believed he'd finally catch Potter, he would dodge or block. Severus was rather impressed with the boy's show of power and reflexes.
Harry felt amazing. This had been his first opportunity to see how well his wandless and wordless magic would hold up in a duel. His whole body felt like it was buzzing with magic. However, he had rolled a few times and managed to aggravate his side which was now throbbing. He also was starting to wheeze a little and felt like he had an elephant sitting on his chest. He would push on, but he hoped the Potions Master was about ready for a break. He needed to catch his breath. He was starting to see black spots in the edges of his vision.
Harry's left side suddenly exploded with pain. Snape had finally landed a hex and Harry felt tears sting his eyes. He fell to his knees.
"Potter if a single stinging hex brings you to your knees, a fight with Death Eaters is going to be the end of you." Snape sneered from somewhere behind him.
Harry bit his tongue harshly. He didn't want to get into a fight with Snape. Unlike occlumency lessons he wasn't going to be able to avoid Snape after. He'd held his tongue earlier too, when Snape had tried to lecture him on combat. He had already dueled Voldemort and fought Death Eaters. He knew what to expect.
Harry pulled his wall up to block out his pain and Snape's words. He couldn't let his emotions get in the way in the middle of a fight.
He faced the man and prepared to pull up his shields again. He still didn't feel like he was breathing properly.
"I think that's enough of that Potter. You have reasonable skill in this aspect. It could use improvement, but I think avoiding or blocking most of my attacks will be sufficient for now." Snape drawled.
Harry felt his cheeks blush.
Coming from Snape that was high praise. He hated himself for hanging on every scrap of praise, but he couldn't seem to help it. He pulled harder on the wall to block more of the emotions. He didn't want it fully up. He honestly didn't think he had the strength.
His stomach rolled and he felt like he was going to be sick again.
"I'd like to see you cast on one of the dummies." Snape said.
Harry nodded and faced the dummy closest to him.
"Which spell, Professor?" Harry asked quietly.
"Whatever you think you are capable of." Snape said with a bored tone.
Harry could feel his anger writhing behind the wall. He didn't want to be doing this with Snape. He didn't want to talk to Sirius after. He didn't want Bill or anyone else to know about the Dursleys.
Harry let all of that anger fuel him and he cast on the dummy reducing it to ash.
He moved on to the next one and cast with just as much energy, but this one was sliced to pieces.
He moved from one to the next until each dummy was destroyed and then turned to face Snape.
The professor looked a little paler then normal.
Harry just felt exhausted. His body hurt so much, and he was alternating between feeling like he was on fire and freezing.
Snape swallowed hard and nodded.
"Very well Potter. Keep working on your spells. I believe the Mutts meeting should be about over and I need to speak with Madam Pomfrey before we head to the Order meeting. I think remaining in this room would be for the best when you are done speaking with Black. I will collect you when the meeting is over." Snape said stiffly.
Fine by Harry. Sounded like Pomfrey was in the Order too. Perhaps he could sneak down to the Hospital wing and collect the supplies he needed. He didn't want to steal but he thought he might be running out of options.
He was not ready to speak with Sirius. To be told he wasn't wanted. He already knew.
"Yes, sir." Harry said waving his hand and conjuring a chair to sit on.
He felt his legs might give out on him if he didn't sit down.
"I think another dose of Pepper-up when we return this evening. You look ill Potter. No doubt caught something playing runaway street urchin." Snape drawled.
Harry just nodded. He could go for a Pepper-up. The one this morning had helped a little. Sort of. He knew he didn't have that kind of illness. However, he wouldn't dare tell Snape about a weakness.
"Very well, I'll send Black this way when he is available." Snape said and swept from the room.
Harry sat there staring at the door. He wanted to just go back to Snape's and go to bed. He felt awful.
Severus made his way down the many staircases of Hogwarts on his way to the headmaster's office. He couldn't slow his mind down.
Potter's show of power had been amazing. He'd thought perhaps he had just learned a wandless shield charms and was using his seeker reflexes while he had been casting at the boy. When he'd seen Potter demolish over a dozen dummies all in diverse ways within minutes without a wand or ever saying a word, he'd been a little impressed and honestly a little intimidated. What child who hadn't even come to their magical majority could do that.
When he came around the corner near the office, he saw Black and Lupin talking in hushed tones. It didn't look good. He had hoped that Blacks meeting would go well so he could off load the boy on him quickly.
They stopped talking as he approached.
"Severus." Lupin said with a nod.
Severus nodded back.
"Potter is waiting for you in a room on the Seventh floor. I instructed him to remain there until the Order meeting concludes." Severus informed them.
"Where on the seventh floor?" Lupin asked.
"It's the room across from the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy." Severus said feeling slightly annoyed.
He stepped past them and headed to the hospital wing. He wanted to check Poppy's supplies before the meeting. He'd like to speak with Albus as well, but he was feeling a bit mixed about speaking to him about the boy.
He was still considering talking to Black today as well. Potter's behavior this morning was confusing. Who wakes up in the middle of the night and does laundry? And why would the boy think he wasn't allowed breakfast? He'd heard of being sent to bed without supper, but they were planning a duel. The body needed fuel. Magic took a lot of energy. Surely Potter understood that. Wixen needed to take in significantly more calories in a day to meet there basic needs.
Severus huffed. He'd take care of his business and adress Potter later. He was starting to get quite a list of things to talk to the boy about. Strangely many of the matters were basic things he usually informed his first years off. He really needed to speak with Minerva. Perhaps he could have a visit with her over the weekend while Potter was on restriction.
When he reached the Hospital wing, he pushed thoughts of Potter behind one of his shields. There was nothing he could do with the boy right now.
"Sirius, we need to go slow with this. If Harry isn't ready to talk you can't push him. We're just letting him know that we know. That he can talk to us if he wants to. All right?" Remus said softly as they made their way up the stairs.
Remus saw Sirius nod.
Sirius had stressed about this meeting all day yesterday. He'd even almost forgotten about the meeting with Amelia.
Remus sighed. The meeting with Amelia had gone about as well as expected. She had already known some of the story from interviews with Lucius and Peter. Sirius had filled in the rest. She said she thought that since they had never had a trial for Sirius the charges could be dropped in a few weeks. She told them not to expect much more then that from the current Ministry. She had apologized for the injustice, but she didn't think the Ministry would publicly apologize or compensate him like they should for his wrongful imprisonment.
Sirius had brushed off all of that. Sirius had the vast Black fortune. He wasn't interested in more money.
He had requested guardianship papers for Harry, and she had provided them easily. They would be filed and approved as soon as Sirius was cleared.
Sirius had inquired about adding Remus to the guardianship papers and Amelia had shot them down. In her words the Laws in Britain were against them right now. If they wanted to leave the country, they would have better luck.
Remus had felt ashamed of his condition most of his life. Things like this shouldn't come as a surprise to him. Yet it still hurt that they'd have to leave for them to get married or for him to formally have shared guardianship of Harry.
Sirius had been trying to cheer him up when Severus had shown up. The man had seemed oddly stiff with his comments. Not that the man was usually warm but usually it came with 'Wolf' or 'Mutt' or 'The Potter Brat' and it hadn't this time. Severus had seemed distracted.
When they reached the door Remus looked to Sirius.
"Are you ready?" Remus asked.
"Yeah." Sirius said softly.
Remus pushed the door open and was amazed at the room that they had walked into.
Harry had described the room to them when he'd come at Christmas, it was rather impressive.
Remus took note that Harry was sitting on a couch in the far corner. His head was down, and he had a book open in his lap. He didn't raise his head as they approached but he could see the tension building in Harrys slumped shoulders.
"Hey pup." Sirius said, as he sat in a chair next to the couch.
"Hi." Harry whispered.
Remus sighed and took the other chair. He was relieved to hear Harry's voice. He'd been so out of it when he'd come to Albus office.
"What are you reading?" Remus asked.
Harry just raised a shoulder then tipped the book so that he could see the cover.
'Potions and plants in healing.' The title read.
It was similar to one they had given Harry at Christmas. It had been in the box he had sent them.
Remus sighed again.
He didn't know what to make of Harry sending everything back to them. He was sure Harry was angry and hurt. He hoped this conversation wouldn't make things worse but, in all honesty, until they could take him home, he didn't know how much they would be able to help Harry.
"Harry, we'd like to talk to you about a few things, ok?" Sirius said softly.
Harry nodded but didn't raise his head.
Sirius sighed beside him, and Remus laid a hand on his arm.
Sirius nodded.
"How are you doing at Snape's?" Sirius asked.
Remus had tried to remind Sirius that he needed to check in on how Harry was now, not just what had happened in the past.
"Fine." Harry whispered.
Sirius ran his hand over his face.
"We talked with Bill a few days ago." Sirius said.
Remus could slap Sirius. The man had absolutely no tact whatsoever.
Harry's head snapped up.
Remus was a little taken aback. Harry's face was red, and he looked feverish. His eyes had a slight shine of tears in them. He looked sick.
Remus took a deep breath and realized he could smell just how sick Harry was. He could smell the sweat but also alarmingly he could smell blood and the sickly-sweet smell of infection. Harry was really sick. How long had he been like this? Why hadn't Severus given him something or taken him to Poppy?
Remus swallowed. They would be addressing this before they left.
"What…What do you mean?" Harry asked.
Remus could feel Sirius stiffening up at the question.
"The twins talked to Bill. We know you know that. Bill called you. He thought it best for him to come to us. So that we can help you." Sirius murmured.
Harry's jaw clenched and his hands balled into fists. This conversation was not going to go the way Sirius had hoped.
Harry shook his head and looked away from them.
"It doesn't matter." Harry said, jumping up from his seat and pacing around.
"It does matter." Sirius said calmly.
Remus was thankful that Sirius was at least keeping calm.
Harry spun around and pinned them both with a harsh look.
"Why? Why does it matter? You're sending me back right? When? It doesn't matter. Dumbledore will send me back eventually." Harry growled.
"No pup. You're not going back. They left the country. The wards fell." Sirius tried.
Harry got a pinched look on his face and then shook his head.
They watched as he paced again.
"Is there anything we can do for you?" Remus asked.
He hoped there would be something they could do to help Harry.
Harry laughed a cold laugh and turned back to them and wrapped his arms around himself.
"You want to help, now?" Harry spat.
"Where were you before? You tell me you were friends with my parents and yet you couldn't check in once. Then you give me hope just to disappear again. Where were you this summer while I was mourning Sirius? Hiding out with him? If I hadn't been dumped in the middle of that meeting, would you have even bothered to tell me he was alive? You told me he was dead. Where were you? Were you standing outside my relative's house while my uncle kicked the shit out of me?!" Harry screamed.
Remus felt so much guilt for not having been there more for Harry. The laws would never have allowed him to take him in. But he should have checked on him, to hell with Albus 'wisdom.' Harry was right. He should have been there. He hadn't known about Sirius, but he should have checked in. Harry's last words had Remus near tears. He had guarded Privet drive and he'd never checked in. Albus had told them not to. Albus was wrong though.
"How could you let me think you were dead?" Harry said in a horse whisper.
Sirius looked down. Remus knew he had explained this to Harry in Dumbledore's office. Obviously, Harry really hadn't been listening. Sirius' eyes looked misty, and he couldn't say he was faring much better.
"I didn't know Harry. I was trying to apparate when Bella hit me with that curse. I wasn't trying to leave, just do a jump. It was a skill we used in the Aurors. I was trying to get to Remus. I got disoriented and ended up past out in a forest for two days. I splinched myself. I didn't know everyone thought I had died. I would have come straight back Harry. I didn't mean to hurt you." Sirius said earnestly.
Harry nodded and then clenched his jaw. He raised his head and stared at the ceiling for a few moments. Remus could tell Harry was trying to keep himself from crying.
Remus wiped his own cheek and cleared his throat.
Sirius turned and looked at him and the look on his face was completely heartbroken.
Harry walked back over and sat on the couch. He dropped his head into his hands.
"I'm sorry. I really didn't mean for all of this. I just seem to keep making mistakes. I'm sorry for yelling at you guys. I…I'm sorry for stealing from you Sirius. I…. I just didn't want someone else to take anything." Harry said his voice was wobbly.
When Harry raised his head to look at Sirius, he could see a mix of sorrow and fear.
Remus felt like his heart was shattering again. He understood now why Harry had sent everything back. Why he'd yelled. Not that he didn't have every reason too.
Harry was afraid Sirius was going to turn him away. If he didn't remember the conversation from Albus office, he probably felt like he'd already been pushed away. Dumped with Snape like something unwanted.
"Harry, I don't care about any of that. You can take the shirt off my back. I'd willingly give you my own wand pup. I love you." Sirius said.
Harry started shaking his head again.
"Don't say that." Harry said in a harsh whisper.
Sirius looked hurt but he didn't say anything. They both loved Harry more than anything, but they couldn't push Harry right now.
Remus cleared his throat.
"We had a meeting with Amelia. Sirius should be cleared in a few weeks. Bill has been working on the wards at my home. When those things are done, you can come stay with us." Remus said softly.
Harry just shook his head again.
"I don't want to hear it. I'm glad for you Siri, but please don't tell me will live together. I can't…. I can't hear it again." Harry murmured.
He was staring at his hands again.
Remus noticed his hands were covered in tiny cuts and wondered what had caused them. They looked too fresh to be something that he'd done while on the run. What was Severus having him do for punishment. He shouldn't be doing anything that was causing him pain or injury.
"Okay Harry. We won't talk about that now." Remus said calmly.
"How are you feeling?" Remus probed.
Harry shrugged.
"I'm fine." Harry brushed off.
Remus sighed.
"Harry, I know you've done some studying about werewolves. Can you tell me what my senses can tell about you right now?"
Harry's cheeks flushed a little.
"I guess I'm feeling a little under the weather. Snape gave me a Pepper-up this morning and said he'd give me another when we got back. I'll be fine." Harry said dismissively.
Remus wanted to growl. Pepper-up wouldn't do anything for Harry except perhaps mask the symptoms until he was nearly dead from whatever infection he was dealing with.
Remus had studied to be a healer and had pivoted to mind healing later. He was sure that if he was allowed to get certified he would have. No one would allow a werewolf to heal people though. He wondered if he could leave Britain and get certified. Something to discuss with Sirius.
Sirius shot him a slightly alarmed look. He squeezed Sirius arm in reassurance.
"Harry, I know it's not 'a little under the weather.' You need potions and probably healing." Remus said softly.
Harry dropped his head back into his hands.
"Why didn't you tell Professor Snape you were hurt?" Remus asked.
Harry just shook his head.
"I was going to go to the hospital wing during the meeting." Harry whispered.
"Poppy is in the order. Were…were you going to steal what you needed?" Remus asked without judgement.
Remus saw Harry's shoulders shake a little.
"Sorry." Harry whispered through tears.
"It's okay." Remus said choking back his own tears.
Remus heart broke hearing Harry apologize. Harry didn't need to apologize for trying to take care of himself. It had become painfully obvious that absolutely no one was watching out for Harry. He'd been left to fend for himself.
"Will you let me see? I can get what you need. Get you patched up before we have to go to the meeting." Remus asked quietly.
Harry shook his head.
Remus sighed and looked to Sirius, who now had a steady stream of tears running down his face.
Taking a deep breath he steadied his nerves.
"Harry, it's either me or you'll need to see Madam Pomfrey. We can't do nothing pup. You'll just get worse if we don't get it fixed up." Remus said calmly but with conviction.
Severus words about Remus wanting to be Harry's father rang in his head. This would be difficult, and he knew Harry wanted to hide from them but when matters of safety and health were involved, he couldn't let Harry choose.
Harry's shoulder slumped.
"If I let you see, can you just get me what I need?" Harry mumbled.
Remus considered the request. Harry didn't want to be touched, which was understandable, but he wasn't sure it was the wisest choice given how sick Harry seemed. However, he would be going home with Severus who had Medi-wizard training. Perhaps they could allow Harry a little say in what was happening here.
"We can do that, but we are going to need to tell Severus. So that he can keep an eye on you and make sure you don't get worse." Remus said.
Harry's head popped up and he looked a little green.
"Not about everything. Just that your injured and what potions you're going to need to heal up." Remus reassured.
Harry's eyes still looked wide, and he looked pleadingly to Sirius.
Remus also looked to Sirius. He hoped he wouldn't fold to placate Harry. Remus didn't want to fight with Sirius about Harry.
"Sorry Pup. I don't think we have another option." Sirius said, reaching out to Harry.
Harry pulled back and sighed deeply. Then he nodded.
"Okay. Do you want Sirius to stay here?" Remus asked.
He knew Harry was uncomfortable, but he didn't want to make it worse. Or like he was being put on display.
Harry blushed again and twisted his hands in the hem of his shirt. He was so obviously uncomfortable. He didn't want to make Harry feel that way. However, this needed to be delt with.
"You're going to tell him anyway, right?" Harry asked resignedly.
"I won't if it's not what you want Harry." Remus said.
He caught a look of disbelief from Sirius but ignored it.
Harry just shrugged and pulled himself to his feet.
"Doesn't matter." Harry muttered.
Remus wanted to correct him and tell him that how he felt did matter but before he'd had a chance Harry was pulling the left side of his shirt up with shaking hands, and turning so that they could see.
Remus felt sick.
He could only see from hip to lower ribs on Harry's left side, but it was bad.
Harry had road rash that was red with inflammation and infection. It extended farther up under his shirt and disappeared under the waist of his pants. There was a variety of bruises including what looked like restraint marks running all over the small patch of skin. Those bruises looked fresh, and Remus felt his blood boil. Severus must have cast an incarcerous on Harry. He couldn't even imagine how painful that must have been.
Harry was nothing but skin and bone. He looked like he was more malnourished than Sirius had been when he'd escaped Azkaban. It was horrifying. Remus wondered if the bruising wasn't really a side effect of the malnutrition. If Harry was anemic, he would bruise easily. Typically, even struggling in a body bind shouldn't leave bruises like that.
Harry dropped his shirt and wrapped his arms around himself. He looked hard at the floor and avoided looking at either of them.
Remus clinched his jaw and looked at Sirius. Sirius had his head buried in his hands.
Remus took a deep breath. Harry should be at St. Mungo's. His infection was bad, and the wounds should be dressed. His starvation should be treated by someone trained to deal with it. Remus suspected Harry's magic was the only thing keeping him alive.
"Can you get what I need?" Harry mumbled.
Remus wasn't sure what to do at that moment. It wasn't safe to take Harry to St. Mungo's. But could they treat him on their own?
"Harry that looks really bad. Can you tell me what happened?" Remus asked.
"I fell in the street." Harry muttered.
Remus considered his options. He should take Harry to the hospital wing and have Poppy look him over.
"How much of your body looks like that?" Remus asked.
Harry looked up. His eyes looked so fearful.
"Um…It's my whole arm. And um most of my left side, I…I guess. Starts around my knee and goes almost to my shoulder on my back." Harry stuttered out with a shrug.
Remus took all that in. He needed to discuss there options with Sirius.
"Siri, I need to talk with you." Remus said softly putting a hand on Sirius shoulder.
Sirius nodded and they both stood.
"Stay here pup. Will figure out what we need to do." Remus tried to reassure.
Harry sat on the floor with his back against the couch and pulled his knees to his chest.
Remus couldn't imagine the pain tolerance Harry must have to be able to sit like that. Honestly, he wasn't sure how he wasn't just screaming in pain.
Remus and Sirius left the room and stood in the hall.
"Remy." Sirius said brokenly.
Remus looked at him and he was just staring and shaking his head.
"I know. It's bad." Remus said.
"I don't know if I can do enough Sirius. I think we're going to need Severus or Poppy. Harry is severely malnourished. He's going to need months of potions. His magic is probably keeping him going. He needs treatment for the infected road rash. It's going to take time. Daily potions and salves. It should probably be wrapped to keep anything out of it." Remus sighed and rubbed his temples.
Sirius looked lost.
"What do we do?" Sirius asked.
"I…I'm not sure. If Harry wasn't Harry Potter, I'd insist we take him to St. Mungo's." Remus said.
Sirius made a face.
"I know. It's not safe. I think we need to talk to Severus. He's Harry's current guardian and he'll have him until we can get him in a few weeks. Severus is going to need to know what's going on." Remus said with a sigh.
"Harry won't agree to that." Sirius said with a little anger in his voice.
"We can't give him a choice Siri. He could die." Remus said bluntly.
Sirius looked broken. He wanted to protect Harry so badly, and he knew that they hadn't been able to. They had failed Harry.
Sirius nodded and looked down at the ground.
"Thank you, Remus. You're stronger then I am. I know your right but what Harry said to us…." Sirius said and cut himself off shaking his head.
Remus knew. Harry hadn't been wrong with everything he had said. They hadn't been there for him, and he had no reason to trust that this time it would be different.
"We still have a few hours before the Order meeting. I think we should bring him to the hospital wing. Poppy can help us, and we can talk with Severus. Harry is going to be mad, Siri. You're going to have to be strong. This is for his own good. Okay?" Remus asked, reaching out and running his hand gently up and down Sirius arm.
Sirius nodded.
They both took a deep breath and headed back into the room.
Today was a bad day.
Harry could feel his heart pounding. Sirius and Remus knew. He hadn't meant to shout at them. He was just overwhelmed. And he felt awful. He wanted to argue about Remus treating him or doing it himself but honestly if Voldemort himself showed up with a pain potion he'd take it. The pain had been slowly building for the last couple of days and he'd only done more and more damage to himself. He couldn't take it anymore.
His whole body was shaking, and he was sweating like he'd just run from Potions to Astronomy. He was glad to notice he was no longer wheezing. He'd been focusing on his breathing while he waited for Sirius after Snape left.
He wondered if they were going to tell Snape everything. He didn't like that idea, but he was already likely on borrowed time with Snape finding out. Max was known in Cokeworth and eventually Snape would make the connection. He hated all of it. He just wanted to lay down and sleep for a while.
Harry heard the door open and the shuffle of feet approaching him.
He took as deep of a breath as he could and looked up.
They both looked terrible. Harry felt guilty. He didn't want to hurt them. He didn't deserve their care. They were supposed to come in and tell him they didn't want anything to do with him anymore and then leave. Then he was going to go to the Hospital wing and then he would have been fine. Now, everything was a mess.
Remus sat right in front of him and looked him in the eye. Harry looked away. He couldn't take the pity in Remus' eyes.
"Harry, you're really hurt and really sick. If…If I could take care of you myself I would." Remus said.
Harry felt his shoulders slump. The twins had said something similar last summer. They had wanted to take him to St. Mungo's. He'd been able to put his foot down and they had done what they could. He didn't think he'd be able to get away with that now.
"We're going to go to the hospital wing and have Madam Pomfrey look you over. Sirius also needs to talk to Professor Snape. You're alarmingly thin Harry. You're going to need potions for a while. I'm sorry but I think some things are probably going to come out." Remus said softly.
Harry wanted to shake his head. To tell them no. But he didn't have a choice. He wasn't being given options. He was being told what was going to happen. The dizziness was getting worse. He also felt like he might be sick again. He wouldn't have them carrying him or levitating him down there. He was already embarrassed at looking so weak in front of them. However, if he planned to get there under his own power then he needed to get up now and go.
Harry nodded and stood. He swayed a little and Remus reached out and grabbed his right arm. Harry felt his muscles tense. He didn't want to be touched right now but he also didn't want to fall down.
Harry pulled on the wall again, but he couldn't get it to budge. He was too exhausted to pull his occlumency shields into full force.
"Come on pup." Sirius said also holding out a hand.
Harry just let them guide him out of the room and down the stairs.
When they reached the doors of the hospital wing, he stopped walking. He didn't want to do this.
"It's going to be ok." Remus said, rubbing his thumb gently on Harry's arm where he was still gently holding it.
Harry hated himself for enjoying the simple touch. He was too dirty and broken to touch.
Sirius stepped in front of them and pushed the doors open and they all walked into the long room.
Harry looked up and noticed Snape and Pomfrey were standing together at the far end of the room. He'd forgotten Snape said he was headed here.
"Potter, it hasn't been an hour. What could you possibly have done to land yourself in the Hospital wing?" Snape drawled as he began making his way over. Pomfrey right behind him, wand already in her hand. Harry stopped walking. This was too many people.
"Sirius, go get Harry settled in a bed." Remus said, giving Harry's arm a light squeeze before letting go.
Harry watched as he headed off Snape and Pomfrey. Sirius hand was on his upper back to avoid touching his wounds. He gently pressed and Harry started walking again.
When he found a bed, he sat on the edge.
"I don't want to do this." He heard himself say.
He looked up and met Sirius worried grey eyes.
"I know. But Moony knows what he's talking about." Sirius said, taking a seat on the bed next to his.
Harry's anxiety was getting worse. It was at war with his pain. He wasn't sure which was worse at that moment.
"What did Bill tell you?" Harry whispered.
He wanted to know how much the twins had told. He was still hurt by their betrayal.
Harry fiddled with the hem of his shirt while he waited for Sirius's answer.
Sirius cleared his throat and began to speak.
"Bill told us that your relatives have been abusing you. That the twins have been helping you. That he didn't know much but wanted to make sure you were okay." Sirius answered softly.
Harry rolled that answer around in his head. He still didn't like it, but it didn't sound like the twins had said much.
"Harry, I need you to know that Remus and I have suspected for a while. We didn't want to push you to talk. Especially when there was little we could do to get you out of that situation. When Bill told us it only confirmed things for us. We can do something now. You're not with your relatives and you aren't going back." Sirius said firmly.
Harry felt more guilty now. He didn't know he'd been so transparent. He wondered who else knew. Did Ron and Hermione? Did his dormmates? His teachers? He felt his thoughts begin to race. Was everyone going to know now? Did any of it matter? He was going to die, right? He and Voldemort were going to go out together.
Harry sighed. He couldn't look at Sirius. He felt like such a disappointment. He was weak. He was a freak.
He wanted today to be over. Today was such a bad day.
Severus watched as Black guided Potter to a bed and they both sat down facing one another.
"Sirius is alive?" Poppy asked with a gasp.
Severus only nodded.
He wondered what the boy had done now. Perhaps his illness had gotten worse. Potter hadn't looked great when he'd left.
Lupin approached with determination on his face.
"What has Potter done now?" Severus asked.
Lupin's eyes flashed with anger.
Perhaps the boy had told them of the horrid occlumency lesson. Maybe he'd been complaining about how much he'd been 'forced to do.' Severus thought he'd at least partially cleared the air with the boy but maybe not.
"Harry hasn't done anything. He's hurt. I know you gave him Pepper-up earlier, but he isn't sick. He has a raging infection. The scratches on his face, that I can tell you never bothered to address, are road rash. He's ripped up from knee to shoulder." Lupin growled.
Severus brow furrowed.
Surely Potter would have said something if he was that injured. He looked over at the boy. His back was to them and he could see Black talking to him.
"Why didn't the boy say anything?" Severus snapped back.
He wouldn't have let the boy suffer. He was a teacher and a Medi-wizard. He might be a git and perhaps a bit over the top sometimes, but he did not want students to suffer. Maybe a little emotionally but certainly not physically.
"I'm not sure he felt comfortable asking for help. He's…He's got some other issues going on." Lupin said evasively.
The wolf was talking in riddles like Albus. It was horribly irritating.
"Will you look him over Poppy?" Remus asked, turning his attention to Poppy, who was standing next to him with concern creasing her brow.
"Of course, Remus. Let me grab a few things and I'll be over. Get Mr. Potter out of that shirt if you would. I'll grab him a gown." Poppy said bustling back to the potions store they had just left.
Severus followed Lupin over to the bed Potter had himself perched on.
"Harry, we need to get your shirt off so Madam Pomfrey can take a look." Lupin said softly.
Potter's back went rigid, and he looked up to meet Severus' eyes. The fear that seemed to be pouring off Potter was a little alarming. How was this the same kid who had demolished a dozen dummies an hour earlier.
"How is it you managed to get such severe road rash Potter?" Severus asked.
No doubt some sort of childish stunt had gone wrong.
"Foolish Gryffindor behavior, Sir." Potter said flatly.
Severus was a little surprised by the answer. It was probably accurate, but Potter sounded…vacant again. He wondered if the boy was Occluding again.
"And what was that?" Severus drawled.
Potter's shoulder slumped. Maybe the boy had done something really stupid.
"I…I ran into traffic to save a little boy from getting hit by a car." Potter whispered.
Severus' mind stopped for a moment. Had he heard Potter right? Surely Potter hadn't been in Cokeworth this whole time?
Severus' mind jumped to what he had heard about 'Max.' Potter was short and thin. His behavior upon coming to his house had matched what Mary had described. Shy, quiet, polite, and a little skittish.
Severus groaned. Mary thought Max had been abused. Was that what Lupin had been hinting at.
Potter met his eyes again. He looked so sad.
"I'm sorry." Potter whispered and then looked back at his hands.
Severus' head spun. All the pieces he'd been missing about Potter and all the ones he was missing about Max created an extremely uncomfortable picture when put together.
How was this possible? There was no way Albus had been returning his golden boy back to abusive relatives every year. Was there?
Why not? A dark voice in the back of his mind supplied. Severus himself had been sent home every year. They'd been forced to send other students' home who were clearly at risk.
Poppy bustled over in that moment.
"Mr. Potter, I'm going to need to see what's going on to treat it." Pomfrey said in her no-nonsense tone.
Severus watched the boy blush scarlet under his now pale pallor and slightly sweaty skin.
"Why don't we give Harry a little privacy." Lupin said, taking the gown from Poppy's hand and giving it to the boy.
Remus grabbed a dividing curtain and blocked Potters bed from sight.
"Severus I'll need your assistance." Poppy said.
Severus only nodded.
He was trying to come to terms with everything that he'd just learned.
He felt even worse about how he'd behaved. He should have known. He had been willfully ignorant. He didn't want to know Potter, so he didn't.
With a sigh he followed Poppy behind the curtain after Potter had said he was changed.
This was not going to go well. This was not how he had seen this day going. Today was going to be a bad day.