"Well, that was a bust." Lynn grumbled, sinking as deeply into Lincoln's poor, abused couch as she could. Which wasn't especially far, given that there was considerably more of her than there was of him, but there was a degree of catharsis to the act. It was like a full body sigh; pointless, but affirming in its own way.
"Sorry I roped you into that." She continued. "I'm sure you've got better things to be doing right now."
"Y...yeah." Huh. That wasn't the response she was expecting.
"You showed up here in full uniform." Lynn pointed out, giving the younger girl a sideways glance. "Normally that would mean that you were on your way to do hero work. Or on your way back, I guess. But it's kind of early for that kind of thing, and you don't look like someone who pulled an all nighter."
Stella's only response was to fidget nervously.
"Tell me you didn't show come here hoping to impress my little bro."
"N-no!"
It had been a joke. There were a number of perfectly acceptable reasons why Stella might have the time to bum around here with a normie and his recently turned shut-in sister, but the sheer force of that denial, combined with the way the girl's face flushed crimson, spoke volumes.
"Ease up, Stell." Lynn reassured her. "I was just messing around." Stella's posture relaxed so little that it was almost imperceptible. Good lord, she did have a crush on Lincoln.
Lynn wasn't entirely certain how to feel about this. One the one hand, this obviously conflicted with her own interests, and had it been literally anybody else, Lynn would have already been having a long, stern talk with them about why it would be in their best interests to stay far away from her brother. There would also be some light property damage involved. Purely for demonstrative purposes. Unless they failed to get the hint...
On the other hand, it was Stella. While they hadn't known each other very long, Lynn couldn't deny that she'd become fond of the girl. Lynn didn't have many people in her life that she'd call friends, and even fewer of them girl friends, so it was a pretty big deal that she found herself enjoying the time they'd spent together. And if she was honest with herself, the way Stella got exponentially more awkward around Lincoln was pretty cute.
...But on the other, other hand, it was Lincoln! Her, Lincoln. The boy...now man, who she had agonized over for so very long. And now they were here! Together again! They'd just had that wonderful night together! There was...feelings, and sharing, and cuddling! So...so much cuddling. Granted, Lynn would have very much preferred for things to have gone farther...much farther, but what they did have that night felt special. It felt real. At least, to her, it had. It was real...right?
"I'm on call." Stella said quietly, mercifully pulling Lynn from her inner torment before she could get too wrapped up in her insecurities. Again.
Time to focus on less...squishy, matters. Stella was on call, and that explained quite a bit.
While there were a great many meta humans who chose to live quiet lives in the private sector, even after acquiring super human abilities, the vast majority of those lucky individuals chose to build themselves a new identity based around those abilities. So there was never a shortage of bright eyed youngsters hoping to make it big as the next Luminary, or Doctor Malum, depending on where they fell on the morality spectrum. And really, who could blame them? Successful super heroes, and oftentimes even the villains who fought them, had all but replaced traditional celebrities. They moved in the same circles, they raked in the same ridiculous salaries, and they endorsed the same variety of overpriced merchandise. And therein lay the problem. Even in a world as fantastical as theirs had become, heroes were, first and foremost, a commodity.
You didn't need to call in a high profile size changer like Mountainess to rescue a cat from a tree, some would probably argue that a job like that would be a complete waste of her time, and they'd be right. But damned if it didn't make for a great photo op and fantastic PR bump for fans to see a familiar face pitching in to help out the little guy. And if she had a Burpin' Burger logo plastered across her tremendous backside, in plaint view for all to see, well that was just icing on the cake. The truth was that good intentions, and even amazing powers could only take you so far in this world. If you weren't marketable, you weren't anything.
Up and comers like Stella had it the hardest. It wasn't that there was a dearth of work, new super hero agencies sprung up every day, with applicants lined up in droves, hoping to get signed on. The problem was that work didn't trickle very far down the ladder. Easy jobs, the kind newbies would normally cut their teeth on, generally went heroes who had something to promote. It was a lot more difficult to show off the designer label responsible for your flashy new costume if you were preoccupied with dodging lasers and foiling nefarious plots. On the flip side, difficult jobs generally called for heroes with actual experience under their belts. And since those two categories of heroes overlapped more often than not, that didn't leave a whole lot for the fresh faces still trying to break onto the scene. The result was a lot of would-be heroes spending a lot of their time hanging around and waiting for that rare combination of coincidences to come together and give them a chance to strut their stuff. On call, just like Stella.
"Sorry to hear that, kid." Lynn said, giving her friend a sympathetic pat. "But don't worry, everyone gets their break eventually." A polite fiction, but a necessary one.
"That's what I'm told." Stella replied, her smile just the slightest bit strained. Clearly, she already knew.
"Don't sweat it." Lynn waved her hand dismissively. "Tell you what, as soon as I'm off the bench, I'll make some calls. Put in a good word for you, see if we can't give you a little boost."
"Y-you'd do that for me?"
"Of course. Anything for a friend."
"Aw, Lynn..."
"Don't get mushy on me." Lynn chuckled, giving the girl a gentle nudge. "Besides, if Lincoln found out that I didn't at least try to throw you a bone, I'd never hear the end of it. Little bro's always been a do-gooder, especially when it comes to people he cares about."
And once again, Stella was doing her best impression of a fire hydrant. Yikes, that girl had it bad.
"So you don't mind if I hang out here for a while?"
"Not at all." Lynn gestured magnanimously. "Mi casa es su casa."
"Isn't...isn't this Lincoln's place?"
"Details." Lynn waved dismissively. She and Lincoln lived together now (a thought which sent pleasant tingles rippling through her body). The way she saw it, this call was well within her authority authority to make. Besides, not like he was going to turn away a friend in need. Especially one with Stella's puppy-dog eyes, her bro would cave in a nano-second. Which...might be something she'd need to address...eventually. Still, for the moment at least, letting Stella stick around was just sidestepping the formalities.
"Yes." Lynn said, nodding to herself as she reached for the remote. "You are going to stay here and keep me company."
"O-okay." Stella settled in, already looking noticeably more comfortable. "You looking for anything in particular?"
"Not really." Lynn admitted, as she booted up one of Lincoln's streaming services. Which one didn't matter, it was all the same junk. "Just figured I'd try to find something mindless and—"
"Oh my gosh its out!"
Lynn jerked back in surprise as Stella's arm darted forward, elongating much more than was strictly necessary in such a small area, and began frantically pointing at the screen. Unfortunately, this had the added effect of completely blocking Lynn's view. Mildly nonplussed, she took the appendage in her hand and gently pushed it downward. Stella, seemingly understanding her faux pas, grinned sheepishly and retracted her wayward limb. Finally, Lynn was able to see what had gotten her friend so excited.
"Hearts of Fury?" Lynn read aloud. The logo was plastered all over the main menu, meaning that this was presumably a high profile release. Not that she'd know, Lynn usually had better things to do besides vegging out and watching TV. And yet, there was something strangely familiar about this...
"Lynn, guess what? I landed you this fantastic new project, it's really going to boost your brand!"
"Can this wait? The world's sort of in peril. I should really be out there, punching things—"
"The world is always in peril!"
"And it's always kind of a big deal."
"But this could be huge for you!"
"Look, what's the fastest way to end this conversation?"
"Sign right here and I'll take care of everything. Granted, you might need to put in some face time at—"
"Done and done. Now for smashing!"
"I'm gonna kill Michelle." Lynn uttered, slapping her palm over her face as she groaned loudly.
"It's your show!" Stella squealed, trembling with barely contained excitement. "I didn't realize it was coming out today! This is amazing!"
"It's certainly...something." Lynn replied neutrally, frowning at the screen.
"It's your show!" Stella repeated, gesturing at the screen. "Your first, right? How can you not be more excited!? Social media's been going nuts about this thing for months now!"
"I mean, it's not like I made it."
"You produced it!"
"Co-produced!" Lynn corrected her. "That's a polite way of saying I let them make it for me."
"But it's based on your life." Stella insisted, her eyes shimmering with optimism. "Right!?"
"Well.." Memories quickly flashed through Lynn's mind. "I think I might have...consulted on it? Its really hard to remember—"
"And now we're gonna watch it!" Stella shrieked, pumping her fist enthusiastically. She turned slowly towards Lynn. "Right? Pretty please?" Those eyes. Those damnable, impossible to resist eyes.
"I..." Lynn swallowed loudly. "I guess we could—"
"Yes!" Stella whooped, snatching the remote from Lynn's lifeless grasp. "This is going to be amazing!"
"This. Is. Amazing." Stella whispered, staring unblinking at the screen. Lynn refrained from providing any comment. Not that Stella would hear it, she suspected. The younger heroine had been watching the show with rapt attention for three episodes straight, lost in her own little world.
It was...a show. The fact that it was loosely based on Lynn's superhero career was certainly quaint, but the show itself wasn't anything to write home about.
They'd tapped a big name starlet to headline the thing, but the girl just didn't have the muscles necessary to play Furiosa convincingly. Evidently, at least some people on staff had thought so too, because what should have been a non-stop, action packed thrill-ride was mostly just scenes of "Lynn" standing around and emoting at the camera. It was shallow, it was boring, it was—"
Boom!
Suddenly a door was kicked open, and "Lynn" whirled around to face the intruder, falling into what could charitably be called a "fighting stance." It would have been hilarious her name that was being dragged through the mud here
"Furiosa." Said a male voice. "Finally, I've found you."
Lynn cautiously allowed her interest to be piqued. This was the closest the show had come to having some kind of actual conflict. Maybe something was finally going to happen. Then, the new arrival stepped into the scene.
"Landon!" Furiosa cried, hands clasped against her breast. "You're here!"
"Oh wow!" Stella exclaimed.
"Oh god!" Lynn groaned.
Time crept by agonizingly slowly, every second an eternity of torment for Lynn Loud. It had been bad when "Landon" had arrived, a handsome young man with hair as white as fresh snow. It had gotten worse when, in the midst of the drama happening on screen, Landon had removed his overcoat, revealing a bright, orange polo shit plastered over his broad, muscular chest. And Lynn had just about been ready to die when, after ten minutes of yelling emphatically at one another, Furiosa had leapt into the man's arms and began passionately making out with him. Mercifully, that was also when the end credits began to roll. And so, with one shaking hand, Lynn snatched up the remote and turned the TV off, snapping the appliance in two in her reckless haste. Another thing she'd need to replace, but it was worth it to get...that off the screen.
Lynn turned to her friend and did her best to compose herself. "S-so..." She began, trying to keep her voice level. "That sure was—"
"Who was that!"
Time got...funny. One second, Lynn was lounging upright, and the next she was flat on her back with Stella straddling her midsection.
"I...what?" Lynn asked.
"Who. Was. That!?" Stella repeated. She placed her hands upon Lynn's shoulders and began shaking her. "That guy! The guy! Who was he? What is he? I need to know what happened!"
"M-Nothing!"Lynn protested weakly, trying to dislodge her. But Stella metaphorically dug in her heels by literally wrapping her lower body around Lynn's, like a python encircling its prey.
"That can't be nothing!" Stella insisted. "The passion! The romance! The drama! You can't just make something like that up!"
"It's television. They literally do. All the—"
"Not like that!" Stella growled, her gaze boring into Lynn's. "Landon and Furiosa are amazing together! That had to come from somewhere. And I. Want. Details!"
It was a strange predicament Lynn found herself in. Stella, normally so sweet and demure, now loomed over Lynn, her eyes wide and her body trembling with some sort of manic energy. It was unnerving and terrifying in equal measure. But Lynn wasn't especially keen on exploring whatever...strangeness had managed to slip its way into her show.
Fortunately, she wouldn't have to.
As Lynn was seriously considering the merits of bisecting her own body to avoid having this conversation—
KABOOM
—The wall connecting Lincoln's home to the rest of the apartment complex exploded inward, scattering debris everywhere, as well as sending the mostly intact remains of the front door hurtling directly toward the pair of super heroines.
Her instincts kicking in, Lynn leapt to her feet, pushed Stella downward, and swiped at the incoming chunk of door, causing it to shatter harmlessly into countless, tiny fragments. She took a moment to mourn for the poor abused thing, knowing that she had played no small part in its untimely demise.
A loud crackling noise accompanied by the smell of burning ozone brought her attention back to the matter at hand. Namely the curvaceous blonde woman floating in the remains of Lincoln's entryway, crackling spheres of energy clenched in her fists and murder in her eyes.
"Lynn Loud!" She bellowed as a pure white energy aura sprung to life around her, incinerating what little debris remained in her immediate vicinity. "You are coming with me!"
And in spite of it all, Lynn found herself smiling. This was something she could punch. This, was something she could handle.
"Hey there, Lori." She said, giving each of her knuckles a good, loud crack. "Long time no see."