The fire glowed warmly before him as he stared into it, letting his mind wonder through the circles of chaotic thoughts. Shifting minutely, trying to find a position that would hopefully relax the tension that had steadily built on his back through the day. It seemed as though it happens more often than not for the last few nights as things with the Inu-Tachi continued to unravel in a way that was heart-numbingly fast.

Being unable to sleep just brought these thoughts and feelings to the forefront of his tired mind. With things building up between them and Naraku, it was no wonder why he couldn't even close his eyes while the others shifted uneasily in their half-sleep.

He shifted again, leaning back on one hand while slinging an arm over his knee as he continued to stare into the fire that was slowly dying in front of him. Being in Edo has always been calming, there was a sense of home here that he never truly felt anywhere else. It was a wonder to him though, he never expected for a place to ever truly feel as such when his father had passed. Sure, the monks had tried, but there was always a foreboding air around the grounds that followed him like an unwelcome shadow. Maybe that was why he had always acted out, why his lecherous ways had born and festered.

They never tried to give him a sense that he belonged. The whispers that he heard from them had cut any festering comfort before it was even born. It was as though he was never good enough to just be himself while there at the temple. His wandering hand made it so that people always talked to him, maybe not in the best of ways with the amount of lectures he got from the monks, but they talked to him. Instead of ignoring his existence or quietly mocking him when his back was turned, it made it so the silence that seemed to follow him wasn't as loud as it usually was.

It only got better after Mushin actively took him under his guidance, it was only then the temple stopped looking at him like he was some pariah sent to make life difficult at the temple. However, it was only marginally better than before because this had only given him someone to talk to, but little else. He had also picked up a few of his lecherous tricks from Mushin as well, which in turn didn't exactly make the rest of the temple like him any better.

It was heartbreaking when Mushin died, being possessed left so little of his spiritual powers in him and it wasn't like Mushin was particularly young. Miroku had went back to the temple two seasons ago looking for advice, only to find his old teacher dead. Hachi had told him he was defending the children of the temple when it happened, apparently Naraku found out who was helping him keep the wind tunnel from spreading too far.

Although, Miroku could admit, it sounded to be speculation gathered from what Hatchi had heard around the temple because he wasn't actually there when it had happened. It was possible that Hatchi was just looking for someone to blame, especially in the middle of his grief. He couldn't really blame him though, having a person to hate was easier than seeing it as it was in reality. Having Naraku to blame for the misfortunes in life became second nature to most villages than trying to face what had actually happened right in front of their noses.

Miroku glanced at his companions as they slept around the fire of their camp. While makeshift and scattered, they were his family and he would do anything to make sure they stayed together. They went through too much and came too far for them to split up when everything was over. Even Sesshomaru, as hard as it was to believe, had warmed up to them in his own way. Even though he didn't travel with them, he made sure to drop off the jewel shards to them and even let Rin stay and play with Shippo.

Staring into the fire, his thoughts turned to the blundering hanyō. The very fool that drove his own wedge between himself and the rest of the group, but still acting like he actually led them even though he was never around to actually lead. Miroku sighed as he swept his gaze around the trees circling them, wondering where things had gone completely wrong.

He had given advice and gental shoves in the right direction of said advice, but it was as though he kept doing the very oppisite to show he knew what he wanted to do. Although, he kept coming back to Miroku for more advice and Miroku was just getting tired if having his words overlooked. He may be a monk, but he definitely wasn't a saint. Too much trauma and death had beaten that out of him and it wasn't like he could act as though his past didn't affect him.

He turned to look as Sango who was asleep at his side, she was the love of his life. She was the one that made him want to be better, to try harder. Before he had met Sango, he was ready to just let the wind tunnel kill him. Sure, the rest of the group kept away the dark thoughts most of the time,but not always. Especially when he was left to his own thoughts as they swirled around when he felt like the odd man out. Meeting her was like realizing there was a life after Naraku, like living wasn't a chore anymore.

He turned again as he pulled a sutra out of his inner robe pocket. Closing his eyes and letting his powers softly come forward as to not wake anyone to alertness. He gripped the sutra between his fingers and let his powers take a hold in it, filling it up enough to last the night before throwing it at the nearest tree. It glowed softly as it settled a protective barrier over the camp before fading, unseen to the eye.

Miroku sighed as he turned to lay down next to Sango, when he finally settled she shifted to curl into him. He gave her a soft smile as she rested her head on his chest and he wrapped an arm around her. Finally letting his exhaustion catch up with him,he allowed himself to finally slip off to sleel. Questions and dark thoughts can wait until tomorrow. Right now, he was going to take the comfort that Sango is giving him.

A/N: Sorry I haven't written anything for this in a while! T-T Working at an amusement park is kicking my ass. Mostly more charater building for my story, I hope you like it. Controctive critisism is welcome and I'll see y'all next chapter!

Ja Ne~