Chapter 16

Bingo!

Everything fitted perfectly. The location, the good condition of the house, the Ford truck in the yard…just perfect.

It was already dawning as Sarah had reached the farm. The whole night she had been marching since her car had run out of fuel miles away, and now she had finally reached her goal!

Cautiously, she snuck up to the building. She didn't want to induce any unnecessary noise, so she didn't head towards the front door, avoiding the porch and its creaking floor boards.

Normally, such farm houses had at least one additional entrance, leading to the gardens in the backyard, for example.

Cautiously, and watching for any sorts of possible traps, Sarah snuck around the house. But there was nothing. No traps, no security. Not even some tripwires with chimes attached. Not even the backdoor was locked.

Amateur!

Effortlessly, she entered the house. And, indeed, it was as clean and as tidy as possible, signing that someone was inhabiting it. The gun ready in her hand, she was searching through the entire ground level, only finding the remains of the last meal, the table set for two people.

Though she tried to tread as lightly as possible, the floorboards still creaked from time to time. When this was the case, she would stop and listen into the darkness.

So far, everything remained quiet, except for the wind that was sometimes howling through the gaps in the structure.

The lower floor was deserted, which wasn't quite surprising considering that it was very early in the morning. So, the next step was to go upstairs, checking the rooms of the upper floor.

Sarah had barely reached the top of the stairs as the smell of fresh blood entered her nose.

"Fuck!" she hissed and made haste, despite the fact that she might already be too late. Her gun was cocked and ready to shoot anyone who would oppose her. The horror, however, was waiting for her right in the first room she checked. It was a small one, with a small bed in front of which was standing Ellie.

Her hands were covered in blood as well as the kitchen knife that she was holding in one hand. Red droplets originating from the blade and the bed were hitting the ground, forming small puddles where it wasn't seeping through the gaps between the floorboards.

Realizing that someone was behind her, Ellie slowly turned around, revealing that she also was sprinkled with a lot of blood.

Her gaze was empty, lacking any emotion, while Sarah's was just shocked. Over time that changed, however. The longer Ellie stared at her guardian, the more her green eyes were filled with tears until she began to sob and took the older woman into a tight embrace, dropping the knife in her hand immediately.

Sabine was dead, her bloodied and mutilated corpse laying on the bed, soaking the mattress and sheets with blood.

Sarah and Ellie were sitting on the floor, side by side, resting against the wall, while the older woman had one arm draped over the girl's shoulder. The sun was already over the horizon, its morning light filling the room. So far, they hadn't spoken one word, up until now.

"I didn't want to kill her," Ellie mentioned suddenly, still staring at the dead body in front of her while Sarah gave her a quizzical gaze. "She'd paralyzed me. Abused me. A-and at first, I wanted to, but then… I stood in front of the bed, the knife in my hand… But no matter how much I remembered all those last days, I… I couldn't do it. I froze. And when she woke up, she looked at me like she wasn't even surprised to see me. No, her…her glare was literally pleading me to do it. But when I hesitated, she simply grabbed my hand and rammed the knife into her chest…"

Out of nowhere, her face grimaced in sadness and agony as pure anger arose from inside of her. Her voice was brittle and bitter.

"Again she made me do something I didn't want to do, and-and… I just wanted her to finally die and leave me the fuck alone!" Then she swiftly jumped up and began to let her fist hammer into the dead woman's face, screaming "YOU HEAR ME, BITCH?! I…FUCKIN'...HATE…YOU!"

Sarah saw what was happening. Saw how Ellie was consumed by hate and agony. How the fact that she had been forced to do something she never wanted had driven her over the edge right towards the abyss.

She had been there, too. A downward spiral into the deepest depths of human nature, triggered by a devastating event, two years ago. She used to think that solitude and alcohol would be the best solution, only to figure out that it needed a young red-head to break this vicious cycle.

Now being aware that comfort and a person to hold on to was way more valuable than being alone, Sarah got up as well and took Ellie into a tight embrace, therefore stopping her rage and turning it into sadness and relief as the young girl cried intensely into her shoulder. She held her tightly, trying to stop her from falling into this life-leaching darkness.

The abyss was always there, waiting for everyone who dared to step too close and then swallowing them like a black hole once you passed the event horizon - the point of no return.

Many people had crossed this line already, Sabine having been one of them. And only death would finally break you free from it. Obviously, Sabine had realized this. Once she had become aware of the fact that Ellie never would succumb to her biddings, she had chosen the only way out. Sadly, it had involved the young girl again. In Sarah's eyes, a cowardly move.

But Ellie was strong…like her mother. She had a good chance to recover from this, now that it was finally over. And as soon as Ellie was ready for it, they would pack as much supplies as possible into Sabine's truck and then continue their journey. Yet, not to Salt Lake City, but a different place. A place, where Sarah was hoping to finally bury the past and find them both peace.

A ruin. Well, which building wasn't a ruin after 18 years of neglectance and decay?

Sarah was in the former commercial district of Boston, walking up the stairs of a multi-story building, her small crossbow in her hand and ready for use.

It was a pitch-dark night. No moon, only the red light of her dimmed flashlight providing some brightness. In the distance she could hear the scream of a Clicker. Then some gunshots, answered by even more screams. Poor bastards!

Lucky for her, the building she was in seemed to be free from any infected. Down the hallway, she saw some light, shining through the gap of a slightly ajar door. And though she knew who was awaiting her there, she remained cautious and on full alert as she progressed. Once the blond woman reached the door, she slowly pushed it open and lowered her weapon as soon as her gaze fell upon Anna.

For a long moment, both stared at each other - blue eyes into green ones - until Anna Williams bridged the distance between them and took Sarah into a tight embrace, releasing a sigh of relief in her shoulder. And though the blonde didn't know how to react at first upon being taken aback, her heart eventually warmed up and she returned the embrace.

"I missed you!" Anna whispered into her ear and sniffed. And as much as heartwarming this small reunion was after so many years of separation, Sarah felt very uncomfortable and eventually broke the contact, quickly changing the topic.

"You sent me a message, saying that you wanted to meet me. So…here I am," she said colder than anticipated, averting her gaze and keeping some distance from her former girlfriend.

"Yes…right," the ginger-haired woman replied, sighing deeply. "Sarah… You need to know that, despite everything that has happened between us, you're still my friend, and…"

"Just…get to the point, will ya!"

This coldness. This lack of emotions. It took Anna by surprise and even though Sarah was giving the other woman some sporadically glimpses, she still could see the hurt in her demeanor. Pain that was hurting her too. She was literally hurting herself, only to suppress all those summed up emotions.

"I need your help!"

So far, so expected. She needed help. But what help exactly? In order to show interest, Sarah eventually gazed at her, finding that her expression had changed from sad to stern.

"You need to smuggle me and Ellie out of Boston and to D.C."

Immediately, Sarah's breathing stopped as she gave Anna a frown.

"D.C.? Why the fuck would you…?"

It struck her like a lightning. A lot of Fireflies were operating inside the Quarantine Zones, and more than once Sarah had already smuggled entire squads beyond their giant walls. But those had been over for some QZs like Washington D.C. They were now officially Firefly-free zones. So, it left only one reason why Anna would dare such a move.

"You wanna walk over to FEDRA?!" Sarah gasped, looking at Anna with wide open eyes, who in return just scoffed and turned away before she re-engaged eye contact. She was now full of determination.

"Marlene plans to send Ellie to a FEDRA academy. A fuckin' FEDRA academy, Sarah! She wants her to get trained, infiltrate and sabotage their armed forces."

Being surprised by the outbreak at first, Sarah quickly got a hold of herself and replied nonchalantly "Well, that's called guerilla warfare…"

"She's a freakin' kid, Sarah!" Anna blurted back, but only got a shrug in return.

"So were we, Anna."

"Well, I see how well that turned out," the redhead scoffed sarcastically in return and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "You're still an egocentric bitch."

"At least I'm not walking over to some murderous bastards like FEDRA!" Sarah yelled back, but just got met with another scoff.

"And you think sending children into a war that they don't even understand is any better?"

Sarah turned away, trying to ignore the hard truth. It was true that Marlene and her bunch weren't any better. How many women and children had already gotten killed by their bombings and attacks? How many have suffered? How many brainwashed? It was an ugly war. A war Sarah had supported and fueled for years as well. A bitter truth.

"We're losing, Sarah," Anna eventually said calmly, her hand softly touching the blonde's shoulder to underline another fact that was true. "Our cell in D.C. got wiped out, Seattle is about to fall. Marlene just doesn't want to see it. I offered FEDRA my knowledge in return for amnesty for me and Ellie, and a safe haven in one of their research facilities. Maybe I can get you on board, too. You know routes, guard posts, hideouts… Valuable intelligence."

"Just stop!" Sarah then whispered with a brittle voice, pressing her teary eyes close as she tried to shut out the truth.

"Come with us, Sarah! Let us start over. Let us be the family I always wished us to be. Away from all this madness."

The truth hurts. It always does. Especially when it rips down your world and everything around it. Years of suffering and fighting would be in vain, just nullified. But maybe Anna was right? How wonderful would peace and a family be? A family she refused to have for years.

Yes, Anna was right! Screw the Fireflies and their war! They needed to get away as fast as possible. They…

Voices could be heard from outside. But not just voices. Tactical commands.

"Oh no!" Anna gasped, stepping away from Sarah, who was as surprised as she was. "No-no-no-no-no, FUCK!"

Alone by the steps on the rubble, Sarah knew from experience that it wasn't just two or three people, but an entire squad. Still, she drew her custom 1911 pistol, ready to fight.

"I hold 'em off as long as I can. But you have to hurry and find a way…"

As Sarah looked at Anna, she saw that she was just standing there, tears dripping from her face.

"It's over…" she said quietly, shaking her head. But that was something Sarah couldn't accept, no.

She walked over to her, touching her shoulder harshly and hissing into her face. "Nothin' is over as long as you keep your ass movin'! Run, getcha kid and don't look back, you got that?!"

But again, Anna simply shook her head before raising her gaze and giving Sarah a soft smile while touching her cheek.

"Thank you, Sarah!" she whispered, but the blonde only grabbed her hand on the cheek, now spilling tears herself.

"For what? I've been an egocentric ass all the time… Such a stupid asshole. An idiot."

"I know…" Anna returned and leaned in for a soft kiss. "But now, you cute asshole can make it up to me. Survive! Find Ellie and get her out of there! Bring her somewhere safe!"

Still stunned by this moment, Sarah hadn't noticed how Anna had softly grabbed her hand with the pistol in it, and was too slow to react as the redhead brought the gun to her head and pulled the trigger.

A shot broke and in horror Sarah had to watch how Anna went down, coming to a rest on the ground with a gunshot wound on the side of her head.

Being in shock, Sarah dropped the gun and stepped back, covering her mouth as she sobbed repeatedly.

Only moments later, a bunch of Fireflies, led by Marlene stormed the room, finding this heartbreaking scene. But Marlene didn't care about Sarah's agony.

"What happened here?"

This question alone made Sarah wish that she still had her gun in her hand and could simply shoot the ebony woman. However, she had a task: survival. So, she took a deep inhale, wiped the tears from her face with the back of her hand and turned towards the queen of the Fireflies, giving her a piercing glare.

"She contacted me and asked to smuggle her outta Boston. She made a deal with FEDRA, amnesty for knowledge, tail between her legs. I warned her. But she wouldn't listen. So, I…I shot her."

"And that's it?" Marlene asked in return, the frown and tone in her voice telling that she wasn't entirely convinced. But Sarah stayed adamant, picking up her gun though the other Fireflies were still aiming with their weapons at her.

"What do you want me to say, huh?" Sarah blurted back, making a swift step towards the leader of the Fireflies. "I just killed my childhood friend. A mother of a teenage girl. And that for you and your fuckin' cause. Should I be happy and proud 'bout it?! I did my fuckin' job, that's it! Fireflies onward, yay! And now I have the shitty honor to tell her daughter…"

"She's already at the Academy and out of your reach," Marlene interrupted her, getting a blank expression in return. "As soon as we learned about her betrayal, we were watching her. She had a connection, but we didn't know who it was. When she contacted you, we thought you were the one who was helping, but… Well, obviously not. Putting her daughter into the academy as soon as she was distracted was our failsafe if she'd manage to get away."

"Well, since that won't happen anymore, you can get her outta there and…," Sarah then mentioned, already about to leave as she was suddenly stopped by Marlene, who gave her an intense, threatening glare.

"Sarah, maybe you knew about this lil' coup, maybe not. I dunno. But if you make even one false move or try to get the girl and therefore take away another valuable asset, we'll hunt you down!"

This threat drove her over the edge. First, Anna's surprising betrayal and suicide, then this lack of trust by Marlene. Sarah felt tired, simply tired. All this treachery, the war, broken friendships, the infection, rape and death around every corner, plus that she had been forced by her own friend to commit suicide. She had enough of this! So, she grabbed Marlene by the collar, once again disregarding the guns that were aiming at her, and hissed right into her face.

"You know what, Marlene? Fuck you! Fuck you and everybody else! I don't give a shit about you, the Fireflies, this whole war or the kid! I'm just outta here. I'm just gonna disappear and simply give a damn fuck about all this shit. Don't come look for me or else I'll kill each and everyone of you motherfuckers on sight!"

With big steps, she stormed out of the room, getting faster and faster with every step until she was running, a trail of tears marking her path. She was running away again, but this time, it would be forever.