Italics indicate thinking

Bold is for attacks

Steve's POV

"We're here." Nami said.

We parked at a small island, this place was like a beach resort but it floated. They had all kinds of water entertainment, pools and slides of all shapes and sizes. The guys and I had finished changing and were relaxing in the park. Despite it being my idea to come here I wasn't really interested in swimming.

I was taking a nap on a lounge chair when someone woke me up.

"Hello?"

I lowered my sunglasses and saw a woman talking to me. She was kinda short, long black hair, and her body was reminiscent of Nami's. She was wearing a red and black bikini. This girl was cute.

"Not interested."

"Come on?"

"Leave me alone."

"Oh come on sexy man." She said leaning over to talk to me "Why don't we go to the food court?"

She was almost falling out of her top.

Oh god…

"Come on Steve" She said grabbing my arm and smiling "We're best friends shouldn't you treat me nice."

She leaned up and kissed my cheek "I just want to hang out with my boyfriend."

Best Friends? Boyfriend?

I looked at this girl's face, she had a familiar scar.

"That looks like…"

"Steve?"

Steve…Steve…STEVE

"AAHH!"

I woke up screaming.

"Steve?" Robin said standing in front of me "Everything okay?"

Robin was wearing a white and purple Bikini and Lil was standing with her wearing a light blue one piece.

"I just had a terrible nightmare." I rubbed my eyes.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" she asked.

"No!" I yelled at her "It was…never mind."

I just had a dream about a girl Luffy. I'll never live this down.

"Are you alright Papa you look sick?"

"I'm fine sweetie. Why don't you go swim?"

"Okay!" Lil said running off to the kiddie pool.

Robin took a seat on next to me.

"You're not gonna swim?" I asked.

"I can't, remember." She smiled

"I can always carry you in the water." I whispered.

"I get tired." She said "Swimming is not all that relaxing for me.

I laid back in my chair and watched Robin reading. Every once in a while, I would look away to check on Lil but I was sure she was okay with the others around. Robin looked outstanding in her swimsuit. The way her breasts and butt were accentuated was delightful.

"Keep staring and your eyes will fall out." She said looking up from her book.

"Sorry." I blushed.

"You ever think about us?" Robin said getting up and sitting on the foot of my chair.

"What do you mean?"

Robin laid down next to me "I mean us, you know."

"I'm afraid I don't follow you."

"I mean…I don't know…we're raising Lil together. Did you ever think about us having a child of our own?" she asked.

"Robin we've been dating for like two months. Kids have not even come to mind, hell marriage wasn't even a thought I had."

"Oh…" Robin said looking down "Well I'm not getting any younger."

"What is with you?" I said "You've never been one to get like this."

"I don't know." She shrugged "I just…my birthday is coming up and I'm starting to feel old."

"You're not old baby." I said putting my arm around her "You're only gonna be 29."

"I know…" she sighed "It just feels like my life has been moving so fast lately."

"Yeah I know it's crazy. I never thought I'd meet someone like you, and I never thought I'd have someone calling me dad. It's hard to believe I only left home just under a year ago."

I looked up and saw Lil splashing around in the pool with Chopper. The poor Reindeer was floating around in an inner tube trying not to sink.

"What are you two talking about?" Luffy said.

I felt my hand grab Robin's shoulder.

I'm still so embarrassed about that dream.

"I think I'm gonna go swim!"

I got up and ran over to the deep end of the pool and jumped in.

"What is wrong with you?" Rose said from her seat at the side of the pool.

"Why are you swimming like that?"

Rose had one arm outside the water and the rest of the body in the water.

"Franky said to try and keep it dry since it's still new, so what's wrong little bro?"

"I had a terrible nightmare."

"Troubled over a bad dream, what are you five?"

"You don't understand!" I groaned "It was terrible. I was at the resort and this girl came up to me, she starts flirting."

"Oh I see you flirted back and Robin killed you." She snapped her metal fingers.

"No it was worse." I told her "The girl was a female Luffy."

Rose just blinked.

"Pfffttt…AHHHH! HAA! That's fricken hilarious. Hey Zoro come here!"

I dunked her under the water.

"Shut your mouth!"

I let Rose up for air but not before I had drawn that attention of the entire park.

"Sorry…"

"What did you do to her?!" Sanji yelled getting in my face.

"What the hell are you all getting so loud for?" Zoro said.

Rose hopped up and whispered something into their ears. They both snickered before bursting out laughing.

"You….dreamt about…AHHHAAAA!"

"This is embarrassing okay!" I said "Can we just pretend this didn't happen."

"What are we talking about?" Brook said leaning his head in.

"Steve's crush on Fem Luffy." Rose laughed.

"Oh my."

"Can we not tell everybody about this!" I yelled "You are a terrible sister!"

"About what?" Usopp asked

"My weird dream about Luffy being a girl." I yelled.

"You had a dream about a girl Luffy?" Nami said.

"That's…kinda funny." Franky said.

"RAHH!" I got out of the pool and stormed off "Screw you guys!"

"You should talk to him about it!" Nami yelled "Get it off your chest!"

I took a seat in the food court and stared off.

"Would you like something sir?" a waitress asked me.

I hate this feeling, I need to calm down…just one should be fine.

"Yeah I'll have something to drink." I said.

Robin's POV

I found Steve in the food court with about six beer bottles around him and one in his hand.

"I think you've had enough." I said taking the bottle from him "Tell me what's wrong."

"You ever have a dream about your best friend~" he slurred "Cause I did except he was a girl and she wanted me."

"I see that's what Nami was talking about. Steve it was a dream get over it." I said bluntly.

"I can't~ you don't understand. I had a dream about my best friend being a girl. It was weird I can't even look at him right *HIC* now."

I leaned forward and kissed him "I'm the only woman you need. Some dream woman won't take you from me."

I cleaned him up and since it was late we headed back to the ship. It wasalready dark and Steve was barely capable of taking more than a few steps.

"Alright come on." I said practically dragging him.

"Hey Robin~" he slurred "Why don't we go back to your room?"

"Steve you're drunk. I think you need to just get some sleep."

"Can I sleep in your bed~?"

Sick of drunken ramblings I just opened the door to the girl's room and dragged him inside.

"Hey, Hey, Hey Robin."

"What?" I hissed.

"I love you."

"Mama?" I looked and saw the idiot had woken Lil up.

"Go back to bed sweetheart."

"Hey Lil~"

"Papa?"

"Lil just go to sleep." I said losing my patience.

"Is everything alright."

"Lil shut up you brat!" Steve yelled.

"Steve!" I said shocked.

Lil had an upset look on her face.

"Lil just go back to bed." I said dragging Steve off "You father isn't feeling well."

"…okay." She said pulling the covers over her head.

I got over to my side room and threw Steve on the bed.

"You're bed's really comfy Robin~"

"Are you happy?" I snapped trying not to yell and wake the whole ship "You made Lil cry!"

"She's a big girl she can take it."

"…UGH! Just get to sleep." I said taking my shirt off to get changed.

I felt Steve grab my arm and pull me into the bed.

"Hey~ Sexy." I said kissing my neck.

"Steve stop." I said breaking free of his grip.

"Come on let's fool around~"

"No!" I snapped "I don't have any patience for a drunken fool."

"Don't be such a bitch…" he slurred "A fine piece of ass like you should…should…sho…"

I managed to get into my sleeping clothes without any problems, when I turned around Steve had fallen asleep.

"Just great. Well it's better than him being drunk."

I crawled into bed and Steve rolled over and pinned me under him.

"I love~ you~" he slurred kissing my neck.

"I'm not getting any sleep tonight." I mumbled "You need to knock it off."

I used my hands to hold him down until he passed out.

Steve's POV

Ugh my head is pounding…

I put my hand on my forehead and groaned.

"What the hell happened last night?"

I had a massive hangover and I was in pain, that wasn't a good sign.

"Oh you're awake." Robin said looking up from one of her books "about time."

"What time is it?"

"Eleven AM." She explained.

"What the hell did I do?"

"You drank yourself silly over a stupid dream!" She yelled.

"What dream?" I asked.

Robin looked like she was going to explode "You don't remember?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"That's probably a good thing…" She said.

"Did I do anything stupid? I didn't hurt you did I?!"

"No." she said sitting next to me and smiling "You'd never do that."

I can though…

She then got serious "You owe Lil an apology."

"What did I do? I didn't hit her did I?!"

"No! No, you wouldn't even be on this ship right now if you had. You just yelled at her." She said.

"What did I say?"

"Shut up brat."

"That's it." I let out a breath "That's good."

"Is everything okay?" she asked me.

"I'm…fine."

I stood up out of bed and stumbled forward catching myself on the wall.

I hate hangovers.

I went out onto the deck and was nearly blinded by the sun.

"So you're awake." Nami said "You know you and Robin were really loud last night, Lil had to sleep in my bed."

"What?"

"You're really loud, lots of screaming and moaning."

"Robin said I didn't do anything." I told her.

"Well it certainly sounded like you did."

I ignored Nami and found Lil downstairs on the swing.

"Morning Papa." She said.

"Good morning." I said "Are you having a good day."

She nodded but didn't look up at me.

"Listen Lil about last night…"

"I could smell it…" She said as the swing came to a stop "I understand you didn't mean it, but I thought you were better than that."

"I'm sorry Lil, sometimes I just…I have a problem. Sometimes daddy can't control himself…"

"No I get it." Lil said rubbing her arm "You just, had a bad day."

Lil got up and gave me a hug before running off. I wandered off and stared out at the sea

One bad day…what if something had happened, what if I had done something to her or Robin. I thought I had more control than this. I thought I had fixed it. Every day is a struggle and I let myself lose…

I felt someone smack me upside the head.

"You idiot!" Rose hissed "You got drunk yesterday didn't you? I thought you stopped drinking."

"So did I…"

"Steve you know you have a problem." She looked me dead in the eye "Once you start you can't stop. Don't go down that road again, don't let the other's see you like that. You were lucky enough that everyone was asleep last night…just don't forget what happened the last time."

I grabbed the railing "I will never do that again."

Rose's POV-A couple years ago

"Rose is Steve home yet?" Makino asked.

I was sitting at the table with Luffy.

"No not yet." I said "Luffy do you know where he went?"

"He didn't say…but probably-."

The door opened and Steve stumbled in, you could smell the booze on him from across the room.

Not again…hopefully he just goes to bed without a problem.

"Who you talking about?" he slurred "Better not be me."

"Steve just go to bed." I said "It's late."

"Don't tell me what to do bitch." He mumbled.

"You will not talk to her that way." Makino said.

Steve raised his head and looked at her "Who do you think you're talking to?

"Enough Steve." Makino said "This is the third night this week. You have a problem you need help!"

"I don't need your fucking help!" he yelled.

"Steve!" I yelled "Watch your mouth."

I get that it's hard, times have been tough lately, Mom and Dad have been gone for so long why did you start doing this…what would they say seeing you like this, I should have seen this sooner and stopped you.

I know when you get stressed you get angry and you want to calm down but not like this…

"She ain't even my real mom!" he yelled "She can't tell me what to do!"

Makino walked up to Steve.

"Please…"

"Don't touch me!"

He shoved her off and Makino banged into the wall.

"AH!"

"Steve!" I got up and when I got in his face he slapped me.

Sometimes when he's like this he's angry, other times depressed, and sometimes like tonight…he's violent.

"Hey." Luffy tapped him on the shoulder and when Steve turned around Luffy punched him in the face "You need to knock it off."

"I kick your ass for that brat!"

Steve got up off the floor and took a drunken swing at Luffy. When he missed he crashed to the floor and passed out.

"I'll take him to bed." Luffy said lowering his hat "You two just…get some sleep."

I went over to Makino to make sure she was okay.

"What happened to him? He used to be such a nice boy…"

"I don't know." I told her.

Steve's POV- the Next Morning (Still Flashback)

When I woke up I was in bed. My head was killing me and Luffy was sitting in the corner.

"What are you doing here?"

"You don't remember." He said "Do you?"

"Remember what?"

"You hit them…" he looked up at me.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I told him getting out of bed.

I didn't remember anything from the last night. When I went downstairs Rose was at the table and Makino was in the kitchen.

"Hey." I said.

"Oh so you're awake." Rose mumbled "You gonna say sorry?"

"Sorry for what?"

Makino looked at me before walking over to the table and taking a seat.

"Take a seat young man." She instructed "Now."

I took a seat. Luffy came down from upstairs and sat down.

"Listen I've put up with your crap in the past." Makino said "but last night…I'm done with it! You need to get help."

Not this crap again.

"I'm fine." I mumbled.

"Steve you have a problem." Rose said "You need to admit it. You don't even remember what happened last night do you?"

"No…" I mumbled.

"Luffy had to knock you on your ass so you didn't hurt anyone else." Rose said "Steve please, you have to stop."

"What the hell did I do?"

"You came back." Luffy said "And you threw her into a wall and slapped her. You took a swing at me put missed."

I hit…them...I don't remember yesterday at all…what am I doing?!

I put my head in my hands. I felt so…empty so pathetic…

"I'm sorry!" I cried "I just can't stop! I don't know why I do this; I can't control it."

I felt Makino put her hand on my shoulder.

"It's gonna be okay. We're gonna help you through this."

Back in the present

"I will never be that person again." I told Rose.

"Well you almost did last night. Years of hard work and perseverance down the drain." She said "Don't fall back down that hole. Luffy and I are the only ones who have seen how bad you can get. Don't risk hurting Lil and Robin. Don't breakdown all the work you've done. Every day is its own battle, so take it one day at a time, and if you need help…I'm right here."

"Do you think, I should tell the others?" I said "Tell them how I can get, you know as a warning?"

"That's up to you." Rose said "I told Luffy about last night, he wasn't happy."

"Yeah, he was probably pissed." I mumbled as Rose walked off.

I looked back out at the sea. Why did I do that yesterday, was there something so bad I had to forget? Something that meant I would put my friends in danger, throw away years of sobriety?

I decided that at dinner that night I would tell them about it, so that in case it ever happened again they knew to stay away…they would know I need support.

When we had finished eating and everyone was having casual conversation.

"Hey everyone." I said "I want to talk to you all."

They all looked at me.

"Umm last night…I came back a little…"

Robin just scoffed.

"Listen you might have noticed when we have parties I don't drink much besides water or soda."

"Well most of us do." Chopper said "Zoro's the only one that drinks alcohol consistently. Robin has a glass of wine everyone in a while."

"I used to drink." I told them "I don't anymore. It's not a good idea. Yesterday I made a mistake and almost fell back down a hole I don't want to be in. Luckily, I wasn't too bad. I hope none of you ever have to see me like how I used to be. I just thought that you should all know, we're friends and I just…think it's something everyone should know about me."

"So you're a recovering alcoholic?" Zoro said.

"Yes…" I told him "Last night was the first time in over a year. I'm ashamed that I broke my streak, I was doing well but…I slipped."

"Well you'll just have to start again." Usopp said "It's no big deal."

"Girls." I looked at Nami, Robin and Lil "Sometimes, I can get…violent. If you ever see me like that, please get one of the men. I don't want to risk you getting hurt. And you idiots don't hesitate to beat me down if it happens again!"

I heard Sanji laugh "Well then you better not let it happen again because I won't hold back if you lay a hand on the ladies."

After that we kinda got back to normal and I made sure to refocus my promise on never doing that again.

Robin walked up to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"You feel better now that you told everyone that?" she asked.

"Yeah." I smiled "I'm just glad no one got hurt last night."

"Well you almost did." She said "You're very hard to hold down."

"Nami said something about me yelling. We didn't…do 'it' last night did we?"

"Oh that." Robin laughed "No that was you yelling about me forcing you to sleep. You groan a lot."

I pulled Robin into a hug "I'm just glad I didn't hurt you. I love you."

"I know you'd never hurt me." She said giving me a kiss "I love you too, and I am here for you, when you're having trouble or feeling that urge please talk to me, I'll do whatever I can to help you."

I laughed "Sounds good."

AN

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