WELCOME EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD TO THE FORTIETH EDITION OF THE KICK-ASS STORY, KNOWN AS THE BATTLE CATS: X! AN ICONIC STORY BASED OFF OF THE HIT MOBILE GAME! THIS ALSO MARKS THE START OF THE ENERGY CORE ARC, NINTH ARC OF THE FIRST SAGA, THE BATTLE CATS RISING SAGA, SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY WHAT I HAVE TO SHOW YOU!
It was a quiet day over in Machu Picchu as The Battle Act are chilling inside the Cat Base. They recently received The Legendary Cat Sword, and now, they are able to deal more damage to their opponents. They are all inside watching Chop Kick Penguin 1 to 3, before the film's final release once the film gets sent to Hollywood to see whether or not it'll be green lit to the audience. The movies are masterpieces according to the looks of The Battle Act.
Bird Cat: I suppose right now is an appropriate time to confess, this movie right here is one of the greatest that I've ever seen. Chop Kick Penguin 2 definitely served as the best sequel in existence.
Bean Cat R: I didn't know Jackie Peng produced his own Kung Fu movies! You learn something new everyday, so I'm not complaining one bit.
Axe Cat: If you really think about it for a second, if the fourth movie get's green lit to the audience, they have no choice but to green light the first three movies! It is definitely going to be a banger.
Bob: Damn right it is! Who knew Jackie Peng was a professional at making movies?
Cat: Well, do you know what I believe? We should support Jackie Peng as he manages to provide such an excellent trilogy for our eyes! I can't wait for the tetralogy to be finished. he giggles as he leans back
Titan Cat: I don't even know how you guys persuaded me to be in the room with you, but this movie is actually a lot better than I thought. Better than most of the shitty blockbusters we get nowadays.
Tank Cat: An indie movie surpassing the mainstream ones in terms of quality, who would have predicted such outcome? he cackles away
Cow Cat: I think we can all collectively agree, that the first movie is the most nostalgic, the second has the highest quality, and the third really put in a lot of character into it.
Fish Cat: YEAH! Who hates these masterpieces? I'm going to beat their ass!
Gross Cat: Only a loser or a simpleton would insult such quality cinematography. he takes a sip from a China cup, acting posh
Suddenly, they all begin laughing their asses off. Once the third movie's credits begin to roll, they all can't keep a straight face. They all seem to have been lying about Jackie Peng's movies, and seem to be enjoying them for a different reason!
Tank Cat: It's safe to say, these are a few of those movies that are so bad, that they're so good!
Bean Cat L: Let's hope the iconic moments in this movie don't get overshadowed by the fourth! Usually every franchise loses its charm by the time it's a tetralogy.
Gross Cat: That's because nobody knows how to produce good movies nowadays. They mainly rely on already existing plot lines to make the movie work. Which is terrible nowadays.
Cat: Well, soon enough, we're going to be seeing Chop Kick Penguin 4, and then we can see if the Tetralogy effect takes place or not.
Lizard Cat: he just woke up from nap, he yawns and stretches before looking at everyone Off topic, but how the hell did I end up down here?
Cow Cat: Well, you fell asleep, buckaroo. So we just had a little conversation in order to wake you up. Little did we realize, that all that time you spent asleep was enough to watch a full TRILOGY! Well, two entire movies, and a third up to... halfway through the credit scene.
Titan Cat: What Cow Cat is trying to say is, you sleep so God damn much!
Bob: Well, I don't know Jack shit about a Lizard's sleep schedule, but he obviously needs that sleep.
Lizard Cat: SEE!? Why can't you all be just like Bob?... his eyes smack as he begins to fall asleep again
Gross Cat: Don't worry, I got him. Upsy Daisy! he begins to carry Lizard Cat in his long arms
Bob: How the fuck does that Lizard keep falling asleep? he raises an eyebrow as he rests on the couch
Fish Cat: I don't know... but seeing him tired makes me want to fall asleep... he yawns as he thuds off the couch
Tank Cat: Oh no! Someone, stop him before he falls asleep on one of us.
Bird Cat: Allow me to come to the acquaintance at the times of need. he smiles before slapping Fish Cat with his wing
Bean Cat L: Wait, Bird Cat, how did you even manage to pull off slapping him hard with just your wing?
Bird Cat: It is no lighthearted cakewalk, it takes many years of practice to find the special area of your wing that allows you to slap someone into alertness. I tried it at least once on everyone, apart from you two and Bob, since you're too new to have experienced it. And Titan Cat for rather face value reasons.
Bob: he flicks his toothpick as he shoots Bird Cat a cocky smirk Porra, né! Melhor não mostrar qualquer desrespeito aos gigantes! (Damn right! Better not show any disrespect to the giants!) Now, what are we doing just sitting here all day? I want to do some real stuff now, not dilly dally and procrastinate.
Cat: Yeah, come on! Let's get going and find some enemies to take down. They will eventually make their way to our base and take all our stuff! Remember, they have Squire Rel, so they could easily rush into our base without hesitation. So be extra careful when it comes to these guys.
Axe Cat: Yeah, but we have powerful attackers, and we have fast ones, so we should be sorted. he smirks as he equips his axe Matilda will show no mercy to these bastards. Okay, who's ready to kick some ass?
Gross Cat: I am! Now, let's all get going before these enemies make their way towards us.
Titan Cat: We just want to make sure someone doesn't sleep on us... he shoots a glare at Lizard Cat, who is sleeping on top of Fish Cat
Fish Cat: Shhh! he places a paw on Titan Cat's face You'll wake him up...
Bean Cat R: HURRY UP GUYS! THE ENEMIES ARE ALREADY MAKING A MOVE, I CAN FEEL IT!
Cow Cat: Don't worry about a thing, I'll bust my way out of here, and we can all go after these enemies once and for all. he cackles before sprinting out COME ON GUYS! DON'T SLEEP ON THIS GOD DAMN OPPORTUNITY.
The Battle Act are quick to make it outside as they are going outside of the Enemy Base. They take a good look at it with admiration. It is a stereotypical Peruvian base based off of the iconic citadel of Machu Picchu itself! The most literal base ever, I doubt it should even be considered stereotypical! It originates from the 15th Century as an Incan citadel. And it remains as one of Peru's sources of history pre-Spanish colonization. It is the main source of remaining landmarks of the Kingdom of Cuzco. It was really made with detail, and sized down into the form of a singular building! You have to hand it to these enemies, they are talented at base designing!
Tank Cat: Wow! Everyone, I LOVE the look of the Enemy Base right here! It looks really epic. he beams as he admires the base
Lizard Cat: Who knew the Incan people were talented at making citadels!? he smirks as he gets off Fish Cat
Bird Cat: Ah, Machu Picchu will always remain as one of my favorite landmarks in history, it was made with a lot of care and detail, and you could just tell they were trying to pull off a really amazing looking design. And the Enemies executed it quite well, almost perfect with its accuracy.
Fish Cat: NOW LET'S GO AHEAD AND SEE WHAT THESE ENEMIES ARE UP TO! he cackles loudly before rushing right in front of the entrance
Inside the Enemy Base. Everyone is performing work outs in order to maximize their chances against The Battle Act. Doge is doing some sit ups, Snache is lifting a dumbbell, Those Guys are all doing squats, Jackie Peng is doing some Kung Fu, Gory is doing one arm push ups, Sir Seal is biting down on varying materials, Le'Boin is deadlifting with his trunk, Kang Roo is boxing a punching bag alongside her son, and Squire Rel is rushing through some hoops set up around the base.
Le'Boin: Oh, look at Squire Rel go! She is surely showing these hoops how to rumble, huh?
Kang Roo: Indeed she is! Squire Rel definitely isn't someone to mess with.
Jo E: She's a funny squirrel. he giggles as he pokes out of the pouch
Le'Boin: I suppose she is a rather funny squirrel! I can't deny any of that. he cackles away as he slams the weight from his trunk into the ground
Snache: Could you seriously be any louder? I swear I could hear you from a mile away. he sighs as he continues to lift his dumbbell
Le'Boin: Why yes, I could be louder, you son of a cobra. Do you have a problem with it?
Doge: He made louder noises when he sees a woman of his type. he cackles away as he falls over
Le'Boin: SHUT IT! I AM THE LARGEST FIGHTER, WITH THE LONGEST RANGE! I am superior to all of you. Despite my slow attack rate and movement speed. he mutters under his breath
Gory: Hah, that buffoon is insecure, despite what he stands for. he chuckles We better not mess with Le'Boin, or his obsession with magazines.
Le'Boin: YOU'RE SURELY THE ONE TO TALK, SCARY HEAD!
Gory: Scary head!? That DOES IT! he rushes towards Le'Boin, before being stopped by That Guy A
That Guy A: Stop this! Violence is bad, well, violence is good! But domestic violence is bad! We should be attacking the enemies, not each other.
Sir Seal: he bites down on some steel as he looks at him That is probably one of the smartest things he ever said in his entire life.
Squire Rel: It seems the stickman hath a good point. We should'st all course 'i his footsteps as a collective group.
That Guy B: Who knew our friend could say such knowledgeable shit?
That Guy C: I'M JEALOUS OF HIS WISDOM! he crosses his arms as he pouts
Doge: What motivation, I think I shed a tear. But it could also be sweat.
Snache: Don't push it, Shiba. he smirks as he nudges him
That Guy A: No need to thank me for being the glue for your relationship as a team or anything... he bows as he runs off giggling
Jackie Peng: WOW! WHAT A ROLE MODEL FOR THE KIDDIE WINKS! Jackie Peng feels like he should be famous. More famous than Jackie Peng once Chop Kick Penguin 4 releases to the public.
Gory: We get it! You have a movie, we don't, stop making such a fuss about it.
Jackie Peng: Jackie Peng only wants happiness in his life. Why am I being harassed for this? he scoffs as he walks away
Sir Seal: Well, now that we have pushed our asses to their limits, I believe now is a safe time to go out and beat the fuck out of The Battle Act!
Kang Roo: But we constantly lose on a basis to Bob. How can we counter this?
Sir Seal: Let me have a think... I doubt I have any good plans. Just leave it to Le'Boin, he is decent at stuff like this.
Kang Roo: If you say so, Sealie'. she cackles away as she resumes her boxing process
Jackie Peng: Jackie Peng is leaving for the enemies to attack them. Bye bye! he smirks as he sprints outside at top speed
Gory: he sighs as he rubs his forehead in annoyance I'll go follow him. You guys can all follow me if you like.
Doge: Yeah, I'm coming. Wait up, Gory.
Squire Rel: I shall course thou out there, Gory. she rushes and joins Gory as they make their way outside
Snache: Did seriously no one tell us that we're leaving already? NO FAIR! Wait up. he scoffs as he slithers out
Those Guys simultaneously: WAIT FOR US, SNACHE! We're still yet to follow.
Sir Seal: Everyone is really leaving without us, huh? he shakes his head as he makes his way outside
Le'Boin: Aw, come on Sir Seal! You know my speed is terrible. I can't run at all.
Kang Roo: You stay here, Jo E, here's mama's phone, so you can enjoy all the games you want.
Jo E: he's fixated on the phone Bye mama.
All of the enemies make their way outside. They all seem prepared to take down The Battle Act once and for all. With Le'Boin eventually making his way outside. His body is heavy, and so is his trunk, don't blame him! They all proceed to stare at The Battle Act as they make their presence known.
Le'Boin: I suppose you were not anticipating our arrival at all, right?
Bob: Oh no, I was well anticipating you guys to march out of your little shitty base and come after us to fight.
That Guy C: That felt surprisingly racist towards the Inca Community who built Machu Picchu all those years ago.
Axe Cat: Well, to be fair, Bob is Portuguese, so his anger towards anything South American is justified.
Bob:he groans before bashing Axe Cat's head in That's even MORE racist, jackass. And it's stereotypical. I don't give a shit to be honest. BUT THE BASE WAS WHAT I WAS REFERRING TO, NOT MACHU PICCHU!
That Guy C: Okay, calm your nerves. I only said something. he scoffs Typical youth nowadays.
Bob: You're not much older than I am, you spastic. I think it's possible that you're the same age. You Guys are definitely the youngest out of all the enemies.
That Guy B: Well, by birth year, no. But by age rate and age in stickmen years, which is the exact same as a human's, yeah, we're the youngest!
That Guy A: Well, apart from Jo E the Joey. But he's not a fighter, so he doesn't count.
Jackie Peng: JACKIE PENG WANTS TO FIGHT OFF THE ENEMIES ALREADY! WHO HERE WANTS TO FIGHT OFF THE ENEMIES ALREADY?
Kang Roo: she bashes Jackie Peng right in the head Oh shut the hell up! You can't even pull off a decent battle with your Single Target attacks! she realizes the irony in her statement, as she also attacks with Single Target Never mind.
Gory: Come on then! Let's show these idiots how we rumble around.
Le'Boin: Finally, I believe my patience was thinning by the second. Let's go and kick their asses.
The Battle Begins! Squire Rel doesn't hesitate when she rushes towards Bob in order to fight him and take him down. She starts off her attack by pouncing right onto his torso and biting right into it. This causes Bob to bleed out from his chest as he develops a bite mark. He doesn't take it too lightly as he proceeds to grab Squire Rel and crushes her with his fist. This results in her body being crushed as she spews out some blood. Bob smirks as he drops her down.
Bob: You tried to beat the hell out of me, but I crushed your body as a result. Esquila idiota! (Dumbass squirrel!)
Squire Rel: Thou shall pay for that! she coughs up some blood as she looks at him
Bob: Oh, come on! I barely did a thing to you, and here you are, crying about my presence. Like piss off, man.
Squire Rel: Why must thou act like such a handful? Thou shall not act crazy.
Bob: Oh yeah? Tell me why that is, is it going or ruin your perfect little reputation or something?
Squire Rel: Be prepared for any upcoming attacks I shall deliver!
Bob: You're a funny little one, I'll give you that much. he smirks before approaching Squire Rel But you bit right into my chest, and that, is not forgivable.
Squire Rel: Please, hast mercy! I didn't mean any harm! she backs away in fear
Bob: Too god damn late for that, jackass! he smirks as he kicks Squire Rel as if she was a football, she lands onto the Enemy Base and goes unconscious almost instantly There we go, that is how you show some real action against these enemies. Heh...
Meanwhile, Le'Boin is going up against Gross Cat. Le'Boin starts his attack by slamming his trunk right into the ground. Which results in the whole ground to shake as Le'Boin slams his trunk down. Gross Catsmirks as he responds with a slap across the face with his long arms. Which results in Le'Boin bruising up as he steps backwards to regain his focus. Gross Cat sniggers as he sees Le'Boin backing away.
Le'Boin: Ah, you think you must be some sort of comedic genius, huh? Slapstick humor, is that where you shine?
Gross Cat: I don't know if this question of yours is genuine, but I believe that we shouldn't mess around with the forces at hand here. So I'm going to answer genuinely, I'm just going to say, my peak is out of context, do you get me? But don't get me wrong, I can perform quite the slapstick humor. But it's not where I peak.
Le'Boin: Ah, so you're not the type to put all your eggs in one basket, eh? he chuckles as he looks at Gross Cat But I'm afraid you are going to be going down, to my wrath!
Gross Cat: Well, let's see about that, you gigantic bastard! he smirks as he backs away
Le'Boin whacks Gross Cat down, which results in his body to bleed out as he barely manages to get up from the damage. He is covered in bruises as his legs are practically busted. He manages to get up and wipe away some dirt off his face as he looks up at the elephant with some pride.
Le'Boin: Ah, so you CAN withstand my power! My sincere apologies for underestimating your potential as a fighter, Gross Cat! Despite my ability to outrange you, you can sure put up a good fight against us. And that, should be notified in the books.
Gross Cat: See? THAT is how you act appreciative, you are a wise elephant, a perv of an elephant, yes, but you are INTELLIGENT!
Le'Boin: Uhh, I don't know how to respond, I'm flattered over you calling me smart, but I also now hate your guts for calling me a perv. So I'll just take it as a report based on my behavior in the office, a lot of praise, and a lot of criticism.
Gross Cat: Now, you are really showing off your smarts there, friend.
Le'Boin: Smart?... Friend!? Oh, well now I'm really appreciative of your words. How kind of you to compliment an enemy in such a way. You are one of a kind, pal, one of a kind!
Gross Cat: Aww, you're making me blush! And by the way, it's the more comfortable, platonic blush. Not the, "I think I am developing a crush on you..." romantic one.
Le'Boin: I had my suspicions that was the case. he nods slowly before cackling away
Elsewhere, Fish Cat and Titan Cat are taking on Kang Roo in an epic battle. Kang Roo rushes towards Titan Cat and does a Multi Hit box onto him. This results in his torso and abdomen bruising up and getting crushed from the impact. Fish Cat takes this personally as he rushes towards Kang Roo and bites down onto her neck and pins her down. This causes her neck to get crushed as she bleeds out. She coughs up some blood as she glares at the two of them.
Kang Roo: How the hell did you manage to do that!? she stares in disbelief before standing up
Fish Cat: Well, all it takes is a little bit of hunger for blood, and a little bit of passion for the battlefield! And before long, everyone will come rushing by, wondering what you're up to. It's quite fun, really! he grins menacingly
Titan Cat: It's true, that is why I enjoy fighting alongside him. He never fails to impress me with his biting capabilities. His teeth remind me of my fists. We are both the most durable fighters here too.
Kang Roo: What about Bob? His durability insane! When I was fighting him as a boss fight, I simply couldn't believe my eyes after seeing what he could do to me, and the rest of us.
Fish Cat: BOB!? Oh yeah, he's the most durable by far! He managed to withstand a lot of attacks, he managed to beat Titan Cat in a fight.
Titan Cat: he sighs in embarrassment, but he's trying to hide it I didn't lose against him, I let him win.
Fish Cat: Don't lie, Bob is an epic fighter, when he wants to, he can be a menace! he cackles loudly before facing Kang Roo Now, what to do with this shitty kangaroo over here, Titan?
Titan Cat: he cracks his knuckles I suppose we could show her who's boss. Am I right? he smirks before looking at Kang Roo As for you, it's time for us to beat the actual shit out of you before you could do anything insane to us. Which is highly unlikely to ever happen anyways.
Kang Roo: Oh, screw this! I don't want to deal with you guys, I have a son, I have a responsibility!
Fish Cat: We all do! Well, we all have responsibilities at least!
Titan Cat: Yeah... neither of us have kids. he looks down at Kang Roo
Kang Roo: Bring it on, I got a lot to lose, but I'm sure I won't lose anything. I'll go unconscious at worst. she smirks before looking up at them
Fish Cat: Now, THAT is literal music to my ears, LET'S KICK YOUR ASS!
Kang Roo stands herself up and wipes blood off her face. She begins to bounce towards the two of them and pounds her fists together. She proceeds to land on Titan Cat and begins to box his face, this results in his nose beginning to bleed as his face slowly swells up. Titan Cat responds by grabbing her by the left elbow and her pouch, as he pulls his arms away, this results in her arm being dislocated as she begins to bleed in pain.
Titan Cat: Now, how was that for combat? he weakly looks down on her as he wipes his hand against his fur
Kang Roo: Agh! she coughs up some blood as she weakly looks up at him and grabs her arm in pain I'm going to screw that noggin of yours for this! Consider it as revenge.
Fish Cat: OH NO YOU DON'T! NOT ON MY PROTOCOL! he smirks as he pounces on her and bites her abdomen, this results in a bleeding sensation as she gets wiped unconscious, Fish Cat spits her out Let's find someone else to beat the hell out of, Titan Cat!
Titan Cat: Fine... let's get going. he walks away pretty satisfied with what they accomplished
Somewhere else, Gory is fighting against Lizard Cat as he has him right where he wants him. Lizard Cat uses his long range to his advantage as he begins to spew out fire embers right into his face. This results in Gory bleeding out in pain as his face is blistering from the impact. Lizard Cat watches with satisfaction as he watches Gory burn up. Gory doesn't take it very fondly, as he rushes towards Lizard Cat and bashes his fists right into his face. He bleeds out as a result and cowers away in pain. He glares at Gory as he coughs up some blood.
Lizard Cat: Well, well, well, look who decided to show up out of the blue and beat me right in the face.
Gory: I believe you are an admirer, I see. I suppose I should warn you, I am not the type to go easy on people just for the sake of it. I take combat very seriously, and I will not retaliate when it comes to my fighting. You better be warned.
Lizard Cat: You look like you know what you're doing. he giggles away as he approaches Gory A big, strong guy like you must be exhausted from all that fighting.
Gory: Uhh... what exactly are you trying to do here? he backs away in confusion
Lizard Cat: Who, me? I'm just trying to talk to you and have a civil conversation, do you have a problem with that? Or are you okay with me being this close. he wraps his tail around him
Gory:he sighs I guess you're right. Go on, tell me what you need to know. Why are you approaching me and wrapping your tail around me though?
Lizard Cat: I am very tired man... I just want you to do my job for me. he yawns as he nuzzles into Gory
Gory: he is visibly confused Huh? What are you doing!? Is this some sort of trick or attack move?
Lizard Cat: he is speaking in a very sluggish manner No, I just feel really sleepy. he smacks his eyes as he leans onto him
Gory: Uhh... what the hell do you want me to do about it!? he groans as he looks at the Lizard Cat with confusion
Lizard Cat: All l want you to do is SHUT UP! And let me sleep... even if that means sleeping on you.
Gory: he grumbles before shoving Lizard Cat off him YOU'RE CONFUSING ME!
Lizard Cat: he giggles as he stands up Aw, you're no fun. I just wanted someone to cooperate. But apparently, I can't have that.
Gory: No, you can't. Especially since you gave fuck all of an description.
Lizard Cat: Well, fuck you then... his head lowers as his eyes smack I'm not going to let you give me attitude, now, prepare to suffer!
Lizard Cat looks at Gory with a smirk before firing a shot of fire ember right into his face. He blisters and burns as a result. He screams and runs around as his face burns up. He trips and goes unconscious as he falls onto the ground. Lizard Cat giggles away.
Lizard Cat: Wasn't that hot!? he giggles as he looks at the unconscious body, before going unconscious himself, he falls asleep
Meanwhile, Cow Cat is going up against Snache as he approaches him. He smirks before walking up to the snake. He bashes his head as he looks at Snache back away and cough up some blood. His face is bleeding from what Cow Cat did to him. He smirks as he watches the snake back away in pain.
Snache: You... are a prick, and pricks, they deserve to DIE! he slithers towards Cow Cat and bites into his eye
Cow Cat: GAH! he backs away as his right eye begins to bleed and swell You dumbass tried to bite me, yet you don't realize there's punishment for doing shit like that.
Snache: Really? And what is that? A kick in the ass or something?
Cow Cat: Yeah! THAT'S RIGHT! You're getting your ass kicked, buddy. he smirks as he sprints towards Snache
Snache: Oh shit... WHAT FHE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!? he backs away in fear
Cow Cat: Oh, I'm just doing the wholesome and innocent task of HUMBLING YOU! he sprints towards Snache and bashes him right in the face once more, he lands on a rock and bleeds out from the impact as a result
Snache: GAH! he feels his face as he bleeds out You are going to get humbled so badly once you die, trust me. No one wishes you an entrance to heaven.
Cow Cat: That's not very nice, now is it!? he shakes his head
Snache: DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A FUCK!? You are an idiot who deserves to kick the bucket. he pounces right onto Cow Cat and bites right into his chest, he ends up bleeding as a result
Cow Cat: Agh... he backs away as he feels his chest bleeding from the impact
Snache: Heh... I suppose you didn't see that coming, huh?
Cow Cat: You're right, I didn't see it coming... but you know what I DO see coming? YOUR FATE!
Cow Cat rushes at top speed towards Snache as he bashes him in the head once more, he bleeds out and goes unconscious as he lies on the floor. Cow Cat chuckles away before lying down on the grass.
Cow Cat: Heh, rest in piss, jackass. Rest in fucking piss. he smirks as he looks at him
Meanwhile, Doge and Axe Cat are battling against one another. Axe Cat swipes his axe right into his face, and this results in Doge to bleed out from his nose and his mouth. Doge responds by biting into Axe Cat's axe and biting right into it. This results in his bite mark to be present as he presses his teeth into it.
Doge: Heh, I bet you didn't r expect that, huh?
Axe Cat: I don't know why you're biting into Matilda, and I'd really appreciate it if you let go!
Doge: I'm not going to let you tell me what to do! I'm a vigilante, bitch! he smirks as he wags his tail
Axe Cat: God damn it, you really are resistant, huh? You're trying to make yourself seem much more powerful than you are. And it is humiliating...
Doge: Heh, your anger is music to my ears, and you're only fueling my drive.
Doge and Axe Cat clash into one another and begin fighting once more. Doge bites into Axe Cat's right hip, this results in it being crushed and bleeds out. Axe Cat coughs up some blood as he glares at Doge. He responds by slashing Doge across the chest. This results in his chest bleeding out as he cowers in pain. Axe Cat doubles down by bashing his head with his axe. This results in Doge tripping on the floor, severely injured from the impact of it all.
Doge: Ugh... he cowers in pain as he coughs up some blood as he glares at Axe Cat You were a lot stronger than I thought you'd be. That's for sure. he groans as he stands himself up
Axe Cat: My precious Matilda us surely what I need in order to make sure you get busted by my axe! And you'll be getting ALL of it! he smirks trust me, you'll regret ever fucking with me.
Doge: Me? Regret it? he cackles loudly You're stuck in dreamland, buddy. he wheezes as he backs away
Axe Cat: You're hilarious, buddy. he rolls his eyes Now, prepare to die under my wrath! he cackles away as he looks at Doge backing away Are you scared?
Doge: I'm not scared... I'm just... worried about my life! he puffs out his chest as he charges after Axe Cat
Axe Cat: So... you are scared? he smirks as he looks at Doge in cockiness
Doge: I'M NOT SCARED! he sighs as he rubs his forehead Okay, let's just battle already.
Axe Cat rushes towards Doge and bashes his face with his axe, this results in Doge's face to flatten as he falls onto the floor, unconscious. Axe Cat chuckles loudly as he sees Doge on the floor. He eventually speaks out loud to himself.
Axe Cat: I guess that's what happens to little "vigilantes" like yourself! he smirks as he looks down onto him
Elsewhere, Bird Cat is going after Sir Seal in order to take him down in an epic battle! Sir Seal starts off the battle by biting down onto Bird Cat. He smirks as he watches Bird Cat falls onto the floor. Bird Cat weakly manages to get up, as he flies towards Sir Seal and eventually speaks up.
Bird Cat: Well, excuse me, but I believe that you are being highly aggressive and impulsive on the battlefield! You claim to be a smart opponent with a lot of strength, yet you can't even accomplish such a basic task known as "strategy". I could fly around and tire you out and knock you out unconscious prior to your ability to do anything!
Sir Seal: he laughs heartedly HAH! You seem to be spewing some idiotic bullshit as per usual.
Bird Cat: Excuse me! But I refuse to allow you to insult me. I will need to perform some calculations in order to efficiently take you down in the most efficient way possible. However, your strength is remarkable, and I won't let you hit me as a result. Because I maintain the same durability of an orange. Easy to squish under the most minuscule of pressure.
Sir Seal: he cackles heartedly You moron! You try and act like you're tough. But you can't even- gets interrupted as Bird Cat pounces right at the back of his neck, he bleeds out as he coughs up some blood AGH!
Bird Cat: I can look right into your eyes and predict your very movements. I saw you trying to approach me with an attack by the front. So I ascended right into the sky and soared upwards. Then, I approached you and flew up to your back. I was so sigh up, to the point where you could barely tell I moved from such a low spectating view. And I soared right into you and pounced right into your back. Now I have you in a hood and vulnerable position, similar to the vice versa where you had me in a vulnerable position.
Sir Seal: Well, fuck that! I don't know what I did to deserve this, yet here I am, being treated like shit. You are a lot smarter than I thought I would.
Bird Cat: Since I am close to falling down unconscious. I must make my combative prowess pay off efficiently! But I must make sure you get a good view at the attack. As I do not want you to be upset. How does that sound, my dear acquaintance?
Sir Seal: It sounds like a pain! But I believe you are already soaring at me as I sp- he gets interrupted as he becomes unconscious from the impact of the attack Bird Cat did on his hip, he trips backwards as he falls onto the floor
Bird Cat: Splendid! That was a highly satisfactory outcome, now, I shall find a good place to lie down and tend to my injuries. he smiles warmly as he flies away from the scene
Elsewhere, Cat and Tank Cat are helping each other to take down Those Guys as they are fighting in an epic two on three. Cat rushes right into the three stickmen and bites into one of their heads. His head begins to form a bite mark as it bleeds out. Those Guys all pounce on Cat as they all beat him up. This results in Cat to begin bruising up as they all slap him. Tank Cat rushes in to protect him as he bashes his head right onto the three of them!
That Guy B: Agh! Let me get revenge on Cat for biting into my head. he groans as he backs away in pain
Cat: Aww, sad you're not getting justice over this case? he smirks as he nudges That Guy B
That Guy B: YEAH! That's what I'm thinking, thanks Cat!
Tank Cat: Don't you dare get revenge on my buddy! You are not going to get a chance to justify any of your potential actions against him.
That Guy C: Let our friend get revenge on yours. he grumbles as he crosses his arms You are a psycho for not letting us get our revenge.
Tank Cat: Excuse me!? What do you mean by that? Are you saying that you are preparing to beat the hell out of us for just simply fighting you?
That Guy A: I believe that's what they're saying, yeah! he giggles as he punches Tank Cat
Tank Cat: Well, screw you guys! We're going to beat the hell out of all of you now!
That Guy B: Oh no! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT, MAN!? he shakes That Guy A in aggression as he glares at him
That Guy A: Because I was protecting myself and standing my ground.
That Guy B: That doesn't mean you can just go out there and say something like that!
That Guy A: Oh, what would you know about thinking before speaking, BIG MOUTH!
Cat: Uhh, Tank Cat, what exactly are they doing? he raises an eyebrow as he backs away
Tank Cat: I don't know, but just pretend that you understand the whole context. he shrugs as he looks at them begin to bicker
That Guy C: Guys! Can the two of you stop fighting, and focus on the enemies!? he turns to That Guy A Remember the quote you said about violence? DON'T TOSS IT ASIDE LIKE YESTERDAY'S NEWSPAPER!
That Guy A: he is covered in bruises as he both gave and received punches Huh?
That Guy C: BOTH OF YOU LISTEN UP! I refuse to let my two pals just fight and argue like that, come together and come up with an agreement of some kind.
That Guy B: he sighs before dropping That Guy A You're right... I'm sorry.
That Guy A: No, I'm sorry! the two of them hug it out and forgive one another
Cat: Heh, this is very cute and all, but can someone please explain what the hell just happened?
That Guy C: Friendship empowered hatred! By the power of our hearts, WE WILL TAKE YOU TWO DOWN!
Tank Cat: Come on Cat, they're using the power of FRIENDSHIP! They're clearly a force not to be reckoned with. he shakes his head as he backs away
Cat: Come on! Just help me defeat them by bashing your head into them.
Tank Cat: Okay! Okay! I'll do my bit. Trust me on that. he sighs before approaching them
Tank Cat whacks his head against all three of them with brute force. They all go on the flop as they struggle to come up with a decent response to the attack. Cat comes right on in and doubles down by biting right into their faces one by one. Those Guys all become unconscious as they lie on the ground together.
Cat: Phew! That was a close one, I was sure we were all going to become dead meat there.
Tank Cat: Yeah, me too. he smiles as he pats Cat's back Now come on! Let's go find Bob!
The two begin to run away as they make their way out of the battlefield. And finally. This leaves us with Bean Cats to go up against Jackie Peng. The Penguin with a movie! Jackie Peng starts his attack by whacking Bean Cats' bean pod. This results in it being flattened by his wing. He cackles away as he looks at them with murderous intentions. Bean Cats glance at each other in fear and worry before giving in and responding to Jackie Peng's attacks by whacking him down with their bean pod. This results in Jackie Peng being flung back as he bruises up from the impact. He smirks as he withstands the attack.
Jackie Peng: Jackie Peng is a lot more powerful than you think, you know? I can crush boulders by just blinking!
Bean Cat L: I know! We watched your movies, all three of them! he giggles away as he has a flash back to watching it
Jackie Peng: he is gobsmacked Did you actually watch all three of my movies? For the sake of it!?
Bean Cat R: Oh you bet your sweet little poultry ass we did! You are a legendary Kung Fu figure man! he smirks as he gives a peace sign
Jackie Peng: YEAH! I GOT FANS! I GOT FANS! Too bad Jackie Peng has to murder the both of you.
Bean Cat R: Yeah, well, that's not happening anytime soon, buddy! he giggles before the two of them bounce in his direction
Jackie Peng: OH FUCK NO! he runs away, managing to out run them, but is stopped by Bob
Bob: Para bem aí, pinguim idiota! (Stop right there, you idiotic Penguin!) he cackles as he grabs Jackie Peng
Jackie Peng: Huh? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO ME!?
Bob: Nothing much, I probably might fling you right into the Enemy Base in order to get the Inca Textiles treasure variants. No biggie'.
Jackie Peng: No biggie'!? THAT IS A VERY BIG BIGGIE'! The biggest biggie' that ever biggie'd!
Bob: Shut the fuck up, jackass. Bob chuckles away before flinging Jackie Peng right into the Enemy Base, which causes the whole thing to collapse There we go, much better. the Inca Textiles and an unconscious Jackie Peng roll out
Le'Boin: Huh... who knew that it would be us walking away both conscious?
Gross Cat: It's crazy! Well, I'm grateful we got to talk about a lot of stuff, and the fighting, fighting's cool.
Le'Boin: I actually find it the easiest to scoop everyone up and bring them to their next location compared to the others, who find massive difficulty in bringing them to their next location. I suppose I should head out now, see you.
Gross Cat: Bye... Perverted Elephant! he cackles away before making it back inside the Cat Base
Bob eventually returns with the Inferior, Normal, and Superior IncaTextiles. He smirks as he sees everyone waiting patiently for him. They all eventually make their way inside the Cat Base.
Cat: Did you see the look on their faces when we pounced right onto them?
Bob: Damn right I saw it! I had so much free time because I was up against that fragile tissue paper of an enemy. he cackles away as he makes he throws himself onto a couch, exhausted
Fish Cat: That was surely a battle, huh? he rests against the couch before weakly climbing on it
Titan Cat: I'll admit, it was rather... amusing going up against Kang Roo like that.
Axe Cat: Yeah... I'll do the favor for Roberto Mourinho Jablovskyy and ask Cat for him when I say: "Where are we venturing to next?".
Cat: Okay, Bob Cat! he giggles We are all heading to Easter Island tomorrow! To obtain the Mini Moai Statue! And the enemies we will face include; Those Guys, Croco, and Squire Rel! Alongside an unknown Red Enemy as a Boss! There is only one Red unit that we know that never appeared since Bob's arrival, and that is none other than One Horn! So be prepared for his strong area attacks, and high durability!
Bob: Damn, they sound really powerful! I can't wait to kick their ass once the time comes.
Cat: Mhm! But there is one thing that draws him back, well, two things actually. He has insanely short range, and he moved EXTRA slow! So you should be sorted against him.
Bob: Aw for fuck sake! Just when I thought things could get interesting! Well, now I'm heading to bed, so good night y'all.
And so, The Battle Act begin to make their way to their rooms to sleep. Concluding another day of ass kicking combat! They seem highly satisfied with the results of today. So that leaves room for insane potential tomorrow! Especially considering the fact they are going up against a Boss. So they should all get plenty of rest, and be ready to attack once the time comes. As they will need it the most against these enemies. But for now, we shall leave them be, and let them dream away of all the possibilities they have in the near future!
TO BE CONTINUED
And THAT is how you do it! 40 Episodes DONE! More than 230K words FILLED! The story, KICK ASS! Here is the first episode of the ninth arc of the series, so I wanted to make it really welcoming. As they have now faced against two former boss fights from the Senior Tier in one battle! So that was surely the hardest thing they accomplished so far. Nothing new gets introduced in this episode, so I mainly relied on cheesy one liners and juicy character dialogues to fill that gap. I am really proud of how it turned out, and I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I'm going on a trip, so the next episode won't be until a few days, sorry.
Also, on a more serious note Domestic Violence is terrible! If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to, there are several hotlines willing to help both victims, AND abusers! To help make sure both get their lives back on track.
As always, stay tuned for the next episode coming very soon!
The Battle Cats (2014) and its respective characters and features are all owned by Ponos Corporation.
The character Bob is owned by me, however, feel free to use him, just as long as you don't profit, and credit the owner.
This story is 100% unofficial and can be considered as a Fan Made one.