"Sakura sure wrote down an awful lot of stuff on this list of hers." Gai told Kakashi with a cocked eyebrow as the two men walked into the market near the ruins of his old apartment two days later. It had become apparent since Gai and Tenzo had been assigned to protective detail over the couple that the meager supplies they had on hand weren't enough, and Kakashi was tired of fishing in the river every night for their dinner, which is what he'd done both nights since they'd been back.

He glanced down at the list, silently agreeing with his friend that it was indeed a long list. What did he know, though? Until Sakura had moved herself into his life, he'd only ever cooked for one. Gai and Tenzo could only say the same, and neither of them were great cooks to begin with, if Kakashi was honest about it. Sakura was the only one of them who'd ever really lived with a family, so he assumed she knew how many groceries it would take to keep the four of them well fed.

His eyes narrowed slightly as a particular grouping of ingredients piqued his interest. Flour. Eggs. Milk. He sighed, looking up at Gai with a deadpan stare as he asked, "She's planning on making a fuss about tomorrow, isn't she?"

Gai tried to keep his mouth shut. He really, truly did. But when his face began to turn beet red and his cheeks puffed out while the words built up on his tongue, he knew he was caught and spilled the beans. "It's beautiful, what she's doing for you, Kakashi!" He exclaimed loudly, tears already beginning to well up in the corners of his dark eyes, a run of snot dripping from his nose. Kakashi sighed, pressing his fingers to his forehead as Gai rambled on about something to do with how privileged he was to have lived long enough to witness his eternal rival find the love of his life.

Kakashi only half-listened as they walked through the aisles and picking items as they saw them. He wasn't sure how he felt about the fact that Sakura was clearly planning to celebrate his birthday - a day he typically tried to pretend didn't exist. It only reminded him of painful memories, early years spent on his father's lap while blowing out candles on a birthday cake. It only reminded him of the last birthday gift he'd ever received - the Sharingan in his left eye, a gift from a dying friend he hadn't appreciated until it had been too late. A dying friend he'd made a promise to; a promise he'd broken, just like most promises he'd ever made in his life. A heavy sigh fell from his lips as he stopped, looking down at the floor as the memories temporarily paralyzed him. Thinking about his father and Obito was always harder around this time of year.

"Kakashi?" Gai's voice pulled him out of his thoughts and the silver-haired man sighed, giving his friend a smile he hoped was reassuring. The other man was giving him a worried look, and the last thing Kakashi wanted right now was to answer questions about his head space.

"It's nothing, Gai." He told his friend, patting his back. "I was just thinking about how thoughtful it is of her to go to all the trouble of baking a cake." He put his best crinkle-eyed smile on his face as he reached for the list. Gai gave him a dubious look but knew Kakashi well enough not to push it.

"You know, Tenzo was mentioning something to me this morning about how he keeps tripping on those stairs in the morning." Gai changed the topic, reaching for a bag of granola from the shelf. "He offered to fix them, if you want."

Another birthday present, Kakashi thought to himself with an internal groan. He kept his expression blank, giving no indication to his best friend that this conversation wasn't necessarily something he wanted right this particular moment, either. Instead, he gave his friend a tired smile through his mask.

"That sounds like an awful lot of mess." He said, rather than outright saying no. Gai got the message and nodded, his bright smile never leaving his face.

"You know, you're right. And I'm sure Sakura isn't too keen on that. She keeps such a clean house compared to you." Gai went right along with the direction Kakashi was steering the conversation. Kakashi scoffed, arching his eyebrow.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He rebuffed.

And just like that, just like it always somehow did when Gai was around, the dark cloud hanging over Kakashi's head began to dissipate. They exchanged playful banter as they finished their shopping, ending with enough groceries that both of their arms were overloaded with sacks. Kakashi was even able to convince Gai to contribute to the hefty total, pointing out that he knew full well Tsunade included a food expense in the daily rate his best friend was earning for babysitting Sakura and himself.

On their way out of the village, the two men stopped by Gai's apartment long enough to grab a bag full of fresh clothes and toiletries that he'd not thought to grab for the duration of his assignment. After that, they'd been on their way out of the village and nearly to the gates when they ran into Mebuki as she was exiting a cafe with a woman Kakashi recognized as being Nara Shikaku's wife.

"Hello, Kakashi-sama!" Sakura's mother greeted him with a pleasant smile that didn't quite meet her eyes. Like her daughter, it seemed that Mebuki was worried about Hizashi. "What a surprise, running into you! Is Sakura with you?" She glanced to each side of him and frowned when she didn't see her daughter anywhere in the vicinity.

Kakashi gave her an apologetic smile. "She's not. She decided to stay at the farm and clean the pantry so we could stock it. We have some house guests for the foreseeable future." He explained, lifting one heavy arm of groceries at the same time he finished speaking. Mebuki seemed relieved when he mentioned that they weren't alone at the farm, and he supposed he could understand why.

Sakura was her only daughter and the farm was rather desolate and must seem vulnerable compared to the village with its safe walls, well-lit streets, and nightly patrols by plenty of shinobi that kept crime to a minimum. The worst that typically happened in Konoha was petty theft and the occasional break-in. It was out in the countryside that the most violent stories in the newspaper took place.

"Oh." The older woman said, her disappointment evident. Shikaku's wife politely excused herself, telling Mebuki that she'd see her later. Once she was gone, Sakura's mother looked up at Kakashi with a small smile and asked, "So, how is she, then? I haven't seen her since Hizashi left."

"She's..." Kakashi thought about it for a moment before he decided to be honest. "She's struggling, I think. She doesn't show it, of course." He sighed. "She's stubborn like that. I know she's worried about him. And Ino is with them, you know, so there's that on top of everything else."

Mebuki's face fell. For a few minutes, neither of them said a word. Gai was standing quietly behind Kakashi, making himself scarce for a conversation that even he could understand was heavy. Finally, Sakura's mother reached to wipe at her teary emerald eyes before she quietly asked, "Would you mind terribly if I came to visit her sometime? I know she'll probably avoid coming into the village right now, but -"

"Why don't you join us this afternoon?" He cut her off with a genuine smile beneath his mask. "It's a lovely afternoon for a walk, and she'd really love to see you."

Mebuki's face lifted as she returned his smile. "That would be nice." She nodded, readjusting her skirt as she looked over his shoulder at Gai with curiosity. He had, of course, insisted on carrying the heaviest of the groceries and it made for quite a sight. "Would you like some help, young man?"

Gai beamed at the compliment. "I couldn't possibly allow such a delicate blossom as you to carry something heavy like these." He declined her offer with a smile. "Perhaps you could help my friend Kakashi, though. His arms are looking a little strained, aren't they?"

Mebuki chuckled and Kakashi sighed, his eyes drooping as he offered Sakura's mother a few of the bags when she expectantly held her hand out. In spite of his earlier doubt, he began to wonder if this birthday might just be better than his last fifteen or so had been. The trio began making their way out of the village together and towards the farm with Gai keeping them entertained with exaggerated stories of his shared youth with Kakashi that the silver-haired man didn't bother to correct. If it kept Mebuki smiling and kept her mind off missing her husband, he felt it was worth being made the fool.

-x-

When they arrived back at the farm, Sakura had finished cleaning the pantry and they found her working outside on the deck, scrubbing away at the layers of dirt that had accumulated in the years since Kakashi had last occupied the property. She was surprised to see her mother and he knew immediately that he'd made the right decision to invite Mebuki when Sakura ran to her and held her in a tight hug for several minutes while both women cried.

It was a rare moment that Kakashi was reminded just how young Sakura really was despite her strength and independence. She was a fully grown woman, living her own life with the blessing of both parents and yet underneath it all, she still ran to them like he imagined she had when she'd been a child. He wondered if he would be the same way now, had his father not died.

Most shinobi from his generation hadn't grown up with parents; the war had seen to that. But he saw the way Shikaku was with his son Shikamaru and how his other friends were with their children. They had much the same close bond that Sakura shared with her parents. It only made him miss his own parents all that much more, despite the many years it had been since their respective deaths.

Gai gave his shoulder a nudge and he turned to head into the house with his armful of groceries, leaving the two women to catch up on the deck. His friend followed him into the kitchen and they sat the bags onto the island before Kakashi walked over to the pantry and contemplated on where things should go. When he heard Gai clear his throat, Kakashi's shoulders stiffened and he reminded himself to keep hold of his temper no matter what the other man was about to say.

"Maybe a celebration isn't such a bad thing, Kakashi." Gai spoke carefully as he opened the fridge and began putting away the different meats they'd bought at the market. "It's been a rough year. You deserve to enjoy something, even if it's just one day and a cake."

"I don't like sweets." Kakashi reminded his friend shortly, his jaw ticking. He didn't deserve shit as far as he was concerned. He did his best to deserve Sakura and fell short all the time in his mind, but he could be satisfied with the fact that he seemed to be enough for her. Her happiness gave him a sliver of his own and he was truly grateful for her presence in his life. But did he deserve her?

Absolutely not, he told himself. The things he'd done in the past combined with the things he hadn't done all added up to the fact that he deserved nothing. He was the scum he'd tried to teach his students not to be; the kind that Obito had loathed - the kind that only deserved death. Kakashi tried to remind himself that he was only thinking these things because of his birthday - another one he got that Obito and Rin didn't get to have - but it was so damn hard when the ache behind his left eye was an ever-present reminder of all the people he'd failed and all the ways he would never be enough for the ones he had left to hold onto.

"No, but you love Sakura." Gai reminded him gently. "You love her enough to eat her damn cake and smile while she sings you a silly song and celebrates the fact that you're alive, Kakashi. That's what this is about for Sakura. Are you so dense you can't see that?"

He hadn't thought about it quite like that but when Gai put it that way, Kakashi felt a little guilty for how sour he'd been feeling since realizing what it was that Sakura was planning to do. He forgot that although she was young, she too had suffered great loss and experienced tremendous trauma. She had only been twelve when their team had faced Momochi Zabuza and it had only been the first of dozens of times when she'd thought she'd seen one of her teammates die in front of her. The recent Chūnin Exams were only the most recent major set of painful experiences that she'd endured. To see her as excited as she had been the last two days - both of which she had primarily spent hushedly talking with Tenzo and Gai in the kitchen - should have been enough to keep him from dreading it.

Kakashi sighed, giving Gai a small smile as he held his hands up in defeat. "You're right." He admitted, glancing at the numerous bags of groceries on the counter and adding with a faint smile, "Sakura really did have a long list, didn't she?"

Gai belted out a hearty laugh as he grabbed a large ham that Sakura had not had on the list. Gai had insisted it be added anyway and so they had gotten it. Kakashi turned his attention back to the pantry, trying to be thoughtful of Sakura's shorter height and whether or not each ingredient would be used often or not as he began putting things away. He could hear Sakura talking animatedly in a bright voice with her mother outside as she told her about the fish they caught in the river, and he smiled. This was what he should focus on, he told himself. He couldn't change his past and he couldn't fix the things he regretted. He could only give Sakura the best version of himself now.

-x-

Two hours later, Tenzo was cooking in the kitchen with Kakashi while Sakura showed her mother around the farm, starting with the outside. Gai kept his distance, not wanting to disrupt their conversation as Sakura told her mother about the garden they were planning on planting in the spring. Mebuki seemed excited at the prospect of access to fresh vegetables and offered to come help them put the seedlings in once it was time. Gai sniffled loudly from behind as he unintentionally evesdropped, his heart touched by the interaction. Both women tittered, giving him amused looks over their shoulders as Sakura next led her mother towards the house, ready to show Mebuki what progress had been made inside in the weeks since they'd moved onto the property.

"The kitchen is my favorite room, honestly." Sakura told her mother as they walked in through the sliding glass door from the deck. "Look at the chandelier - isn't it beautiful?"

Mebuki nodded, glancing up at the light fixture. "It certainly is." She agreed with her daughter before her eyes met Kakashi's as he looked over at them from the stove. "It looks like the work of a craftsman in the Land of Iron, if I'm not mistaken?"

Kakashi remembered how tastefully Mebuki's own home was decorated, and he wasn't surprised that she recognized the fixture's origin. "That's right," he nodded with crinkled eyes. "It was gifted to my father by the artisan who made it; for my parents' wedding, if I remember the story correctly."

Mebuki touched her hand to her heart, her emerald eyes softening as she glanced up at the iron chandelier again with a warm smile. "I'm glad you kept it. Such a fitting tribute to them, I think. A great piece to tie them to the life you're building now with my daughter."

Kakashi felt grateful for his mask as his cheeks went pink at Mebuki's words. Unsure of how to respond, he glanced at the counter top and touched it lightly before saying, "This is the same counter that's been here since my father was a boy, and the stone on the island comes from the river not far from here."

"Family is obviously quite important to you," Mebuki mused, smiling thoughtfully as she glanced at the island before meeting Kakashi's gaze again. When he nodded, her smile only grew. He was thankful that Tenzo pulled his attention back to the stove so that he could divert his attention away from talking about a past that was still painful to remember.

Sakura pulled her mother throughout the rest of the house, mindfully dismissing the holes punched into the living room walls as the work of vandals. She led her carefully up the stairs, warning her to be mindful of the cursed top step and the awkward steepness of them. Once they were on the second floor, she showed her mother the guest room that Tenzo and Gai had been taking turn using on their shifts throughout the nights.

Next, she excitedly pulled her mother into what had become her favorite room in the house. She pushed the door to the bathroom open with a bright smile and shining eyes as she showed the room off. When they had arrived back at the farm after debriefing with Tsunade, Sakura had been shocked to find that Kakashi had arranged for Tenzo and Gai to finish the room for her.

The walls were painted in the exact shade of dusty, light pink that she had once pointed out to Kakashi in a magazine that she had picked up. The porcelain tub had been refinished from the stark white it had once been into a softer cream color and was situated in the same spot that it had sat in before. The window had been replaced with a stunning stained glass one; a beautiful art piece consisting of a vivid cherry blossom on a branch with a lush backdrop of leaves with sky blue pieces intermixed in the shades of green. Kakashi had ordered it from a craftsman in Suna and she had fallen in love with it the second she'd seen it. Mebuki's own face softened when she saw it, understanding the significance behind the symbolism of such a piece being included in a home where the ghosts of Kakashi's past clearly still resided for him.

Sakura pointed out the slate that made up the walls and floor of the shower, explaining just as Kakashi had to her that it came from another spot nearby and that she thought it paired well with the pink paint she'd chosen for the walls. Her mother agreed, and Sakura beamed as she led her mother out into the hallway before taking her to the final room of the tour.

She slowly led her mother into Kakashi's childhood bedroom - their bedroom now, she reminded herself with a light blush. The walls were still the same charcoal grey; though they had both agreed that it needed to change, they hadn't quite decided what color they wanted to go with just yet. Tenzo had replaced the old bed with a new one that he fashioned with cedar wood and had completed the room with two small tables and a dresser that would help make up for the small closet. On one side of the dresser was the picture of Kakashi's mother with the toddler version of him now in a new frame that allowed it to be seen without a film of dust and hairline cracks. On the other side of the dresser were the only other photos that meant anything to Kakashi - his official photos of Team Minato and Team 7.

Sakura had added her own touches to the room, too. Lining the back of the dresser were a few pictures of her own of her with various friends as well as one with her parents. She had picked some new curtains in a dark shade of purple that complimented the new bedspread with peonies that she had picked up to replace the old one. On the tables Tenzo had created were a pair of mismatched lamps Gai had given them and in the corner of the room sat a chair covered in dog hair that Pakkun spent most nights sleeping on lately.

"So...That's the house. Well, everything we've done, anyway." Sakura told her mother with a nervous smile as the two women walked out of the bedroom and into the hallway. Mebuki gave her a warm smile, touching Sakura's shoulder tenderly.

"It's beautiful, musume," she murmured softly. "I think your father will really like it, too, when he gets back from his mission. You know, I bet he'd love the barn. His parents were farmers too."

Sakura tried not to cry at the mention of her father. She hoped her mother was right and that they'd both see him whenever the mission was complete. Unsure of how to reply, Sakura began to lead her mother down the stairs, reminding her too late about the awkward top step. Mebuki careened down the stairs into her daughter's back, sending them both barreling towards the wall at the bottom. They both shrieked, with Sakura letting out a groan as she landed hard against the wall with her shoulder.

There was a clamoring of feet on hardwood and a second later, Tenzo and Kakashi were both standing in the doorway with concerned expressions on their faces as both asked simultaneously if the two women were okay. The wooden spoon in Tenzo's hand dripped red sauce down onto the floor and Sakura blinked as she assessed whether or not anything was broken, deciding she'd been fortunate that all she seemed to have suffered was a few scrapes and painful thuds that would develop into some bruises later. Mebuki's own fall had mostly been broken by Sakura's body, though she was rubbing her knees, both of which were raw and red and one of her elbows was bleeding.

"I think we're both fine, just a little banged up." She told him, wincing as she stood straight.

"What happened?" Kakashi asked, leaning down to help Sakura to her feet as Tenzo helped Mebuki stand. The rosette sighed, glancing towards the top stair that had caused the fall. He followed her gaze with a guilty smile as he scratched the back of his head.

"You know how you said we could fix them if I wanted to?" Sakura folded her arms across her chest, giving him an expectant stare. His chest heaved with a heavy sigh as he glanced over at Tenzo.

"I'll work on them this weekend, assuming we're sticking around here." Tenzo offered with a polite smile before his eyes widened and he exclaimed, "The tenderloin!"

Sakura giggled as she watched Tenzo quickly move back into the kitchen. Kakashi hung back, glancing at Sakura and Mebuki again. "Are you sure you're both okay?" He asked the rosette, squeezing her hand as she threaded her fingers with his for a moment. She nodded, turning her head and brushing her lips over his shoulder.

"Go make sure Tenzo doesn't burn our house down." She shooed him, smiling when he shot her a glance over his shoulder as he walked away. When he was gone, she turned and gave her mother an apologetic look as she activated her medical chakra while she took her mother's arm gingerly into her hands. "I'm sorry about that," Sakura murmured as she watched Mebuki's skin slowly healing. "It was on the list of things to fix, but -"

"But nothing." Her mother cut her off with a small chuckle and a wave of her free hand. "It's an old house, they tend to have quirks."

Neither of them said anything else as Sakura finished healing Mebuki's minor injuries. She found it harder to heal her own injuries but tried nonetheless until she heard Kakashi's voice calling them into the kitchen for the meal he and Tenzo had just finished preparing. Sakura led her mother to the table in the breakfast nook and smiled when she realized the men had been thoughtful enough to have already sat the table with place settings and glasses. A beef tenderloin sat in the middle of the table with a tray of asparagus dressed with lemon and another bowl with a light garden salad and a large decanter of wine that she hadn't known Kakashi had picked up sat there as well.

Kakashi slid his arm around around Sakura's waist and kissed the top of her head as he walked past her and out the sliding glass door to let Gai know dinner was ready while Sakura and her mother took their seats at the table with Tenzo. A few minutes later, Gai and Kakashi walked back in and Sakura smiled when the latter of the two slid onto the cushion next to hers, their knees knocking. When he saw her wince, a slight frown tugged at his lips as his eyes met hers.

"Are you alright?" He asked Sakura softly, leaning in to her ear. "I didn't mean to bump into you."

"I'm fine," she tried to reassure Kakashi, reaching down to rub the sore spot. "I had some trouble healing myself. Lady Tsunade said it's more difficult than healing others. I promise, I'm okay."

The sound of Mebuki clearing her throat from the end of the table pulled their focus that way and Sakura flushed a light shade of pink when she saw the arched eyebrow and amused smile on her mother's face. It was clear the elder Haruno woman thought she'd caught the two of them exchanging sweet words and perhaps more, and the thought only darkened Sakura's blush.

"So, Kakashi-sama, Sakura was telling me all about the bathroom upstairs. It really looks very nice." Mebuki told him, a sly smile still on her face as she sliced some of her tenderloin.

Kakashi nodded, glancing at Tenzo and Gai with a smile. "It was Sakura's vision from the start, really," he told the rosette's mother before adding, "these two made it happen. I couldn't have done it without them."

"It was nothing, Kakashi." Gai beamed at him from across the table.

"It's what friends do for each other, right?" Tenzo offered before taking a bite of his food.

Kakashi wondered what he had ever done to deserve such good friends. Sakura nudged his shoulder with hers and glanced down at her lap, where she was holding her hand open for him to take. He did so and squeezed gently as Mebuki spoke again.

"I think that beautiful window really completes the space." She said slowly, reaching for her glass of wine. Sakura bit her bottom lip, peering up at Kakashi with warm eyes and pink cheeks. He nodded, his eyes not straying from Sakura's as he replied.

"She really does, doesn't she?" He murmured softly enough that only Sakura heard him, his voice too quiet to reach Mebuki at the end of the table. The way he was looking at her told the older woman everything, though, and the peaceful look on her face never left while the five of them ate the rest of their food over small talk and playful jokes.

For the first time in years, Kakashi wasn't dreading his impending birthday. As he sat there at a table surrounded by good friends and people he loved, he actually found that he was looking forward to it, if only a little bit. He couldn't wait to see the joy on Sakura's face when she presented the cake she was planning on making for him. That, he thought to himself with a happy heart, was a birthday gift he wouldn't mind receiving.