After Shiro's little venture into the Big Apple and meeting the wall-crawling hero, the teen decided to travel somewhere less heroic and unforgiving. The place in question is a favorite among fans of the franchise, where there is no rest for the wicked.
Pandora
Ah, Pandora is a place where sanity goes to die and then comes back as a homicidal maniac. Once, this desolate wasteland was a beacon for anyone crazy enough to think "freedom" meant dodging bullets and mutating skags. Back in the day, you could carve out a little piece of hell for yourself, free from the corporate overlords and their relentless bickering. But now? Ha! This planet's been passed around more times than a cheap beer at Moxxi's bar.
They say Pandora's a prison these days, but let's be real, it's always been one, just with fewer bars and more psychos. You know where this is, right? If not, just look for the place where the ground's more explosive than the sky, and congratulations, you've found Pandora. Welcome to the vacation spot from hell!
On the desert area of the planet, a portal opens, and walking out of it is Shiro, who quickly covers his face with his arms as he feels the sun's blistering rays. "Christ on a stick, how the hell do people live in these conditions?!" Shiro yelled as he quickly found shade under a rock.
"The game doesn't emphasize how hot this place is. I better find civilization before a Pyscho, Skag, Rakk, Loader Bot, or whatever shows up. The only freaking weapon I got on me is Fancy Dan's collapsible staff which probably won't be enough. I am going to need some firepower." Shiro knew being on Pandora without any iron was a death sentence.
As Shiro pondered his next move to score a gun, a familiar, panicked voice pierced the air. "Holy shit! Somebody, for the love of all that's metal, SAVE ME!"
Shiro spun around, his eyes widening at the sight of a wildly flailing robot. The robot had a big, yellow, dorito-shaped body, a single eye that darted around in terror, and an antenna that was bandaged up like it had survived a bar brawl. Its twiggy, robotic arms were flapping desperately as it bolted toward him and then hid behind him. It was none other than Claptrap, the universe's most annoying, trash-talking tin can.
"Oh shit, it's Claptrap!" Shiro thought, startled by the unexpected sight. However, his surprise quickly turned to alarm as he noticed a massive, canine-like creature with solid, bony armor plates and a terrifying three-jawed mouth charging after the little robot. It was a Skagg, a deadly predator from Pandora known for slaughtering countless victims on this unforgiving planet.
"Oh fuck this!" Shiro yelled, seeing the Skagg, a grotesque, mutated beast charging straight at him. Panic set in as he instinctively raised his hands, trying to summon a portal. The Skagg, looking like a nightmarish mix between a pit bull and a hellhound, lunged with its jaws wide open, revealing a terrifying maw that looked like a vagina with teeth.
Shiro's heart pounded as the creature hurtled toward him. In a frantic attempt to save his own skin, he managed to conjure a portal just in time. The Skagg flew through it and disappeared with a loud whoosh.
Shiro stood there, panting heavily, as the portal snapped shut with a pop. For a moment, all was silent.
"Well, that was close," Shiro muttered, trying to catch his breath. Suddenly, he heard a muffled thud from the other side of the portal. "Oh shit... where did I send it?" While Shiro contemplates his actions he suddenly hears loud, ecstatic cheers coming from Claptrap. "Holy shit, I'm alive! Hell yeah, I survived! Suck it, Pandora! Activating dance protocols, baby!"
The robot immediately busts out into a wild, exaggerated dance, spinning around and flailing its mechanical arms like it just won the lottery. Shiro can't help but chuckle at the ridiculous sight. The little tin can completely lose itself in a victory jig.
However, as Claptrap's dance intensifies, Shiro's laughter fades, and his eyes narrow. "Wait a minute," he mutters, a sudden realization hitting him like a brick.
"This little shit almost got me killed!" Claptrap, oblivious to the murderous glare Shiro now gives him, continues to dance like there's no tomorrow, throwing in a few extra moves for good measure.
Shiro whipped out his staff, pressing a button that made it snap to full length with a satisfying click. He strode over to the robot, a smirk creeping across his face. Without hesitation, he swung the staff down, smacking the robot right on the head. THUNK.
"OW! Fuck! What the hell?!" Claptrap shrieked, his voice cracking as he flailed his arms. "I thought you were supposed to be my hero, goddammit!"
Shiro, clearly not in the mood for this bullshit, kept whacking the robot like he was trying to break a piñata. "You nearly got me fucking killed, you tin-can piece of shit!" He yelled, punctuating each word with another swing.
Claptrap squealed like a malfunctioning blender. "Okay, okay! I'm sorry! Fuck! Please, just stop hitting me!" Shiro gave him a final, almost lazy whack for good measure, then stood back, breathing heavily. "Next time you try to use someone as a meat shield, be ready to face the consequences!"
While Shiro was a fan of Claptrap, he forgot the damn robot tends to act arrogant and act very stupid. "Okay, with that lesson out of the way, I believe a reward is in order. You wouldn't have an echo device on you because mine just got busted." Shiro lied since he didn't have one, only his phone, which he needed to keep hidden as the technology would be considered ancient.
"Of course, though those are meant for Vault Hunters, but I can part ways with one. However, if you want it to work, you need to register it at a Quick Change." The robot spoke, and Shiro nodded in response. "Alright, where's this Quick Change station?" he asked, his voice edged with tension. The robot eagerly answered, "Oh, the nearest Quick Change is at a bus stop at Covenant Pass," Claptrap chimed in.
Shiro's eyes widened in shock, his jaw tightening. "Shit," he muttered under his breath. "I'm in Borderlands 3? But where the hell am I in the first chapter, second? Damn it, I haven't even finished the game, and now I'm stuck here, knowing the ending because I spoiled it with those fucking videos. Fuck it, maybe Claptrap can give me a clue." Shiro muttered to himself before turning to the little robot, his mind racing with the grim realization of how deep in this he might be.
"Hey, before we get going, has anything crazy been going on this planet?" Shiro asked, and Claptrap nodded. "You have to be more specific. I mean, besides the deadly fauna and creatures that live on Pandora, we have crazy psychopathic murders trying to kill people here. Also, where are my manners? I forgot to introduce myself. I am a CL4P-TP steward bot, but you can just call me… General Claptrap of the Crimson Raiders! What's your name?" Claptrap asked, which Shiro groaned as he was praying he wasn't in the first chapter.
"Oni, my name is Oni. Don't ask why it is got it." Shiro glared at Claptrap as he didn't want to use his real name, which the steward robot understood. "You got it now. Follow me to Quick Change. It will probably take us an hour, but you can listen to my beatboxing while we are heading there." When Claptrap said that, Shiro quickly opened a portal that showed the bus stop Claptrap was talking about. This shocks the robot, and he looks at Shiro.
"How did you make a portal?! Are you some test subject that got experimented on and got some freaky powers?" Claptrap asked, looking at Shiro, to which the teenager had just rolled his eyes. "How did I get my powers? Let's just say I won the lottery," Shiro said before walking into the portal, followed by Claptrap. The portal closed, and Shiro and Claptrop were at the bus stop at Covenant Pass. Shiro then looked around the bus stop and saw a large machine that said 'Quick Change,' and under it said PTM or 'Personal Transformation Machine.'
"We are here now. Hand me the Echo Device," Shiro said. Looking at Claptrap, the robot nodded and pulled the sizeable rectangular device out of nowhere, handing it to Shiro. Then, the teen held it and saw it had a screen and a tape record-like body.
"The ECHO-3. Slightly more powerful than the ECHO-2, and twice as expensive. Besides, the ECHO-2 had a tiny issue with spontaneous combustion, so they rebranded those as grenades." As Claptrap said those words, Shiro smiled, holding the device, and just like in the game, he pressed the tap of the device, making its antenna pop before pressing the middle button to power it, on which the screen showed DAHL. Shiro's Echo device then showed his health module and a Digital Map.
"Okay, just press the button on the machine, and your Echo Device will be registered," Claptrap said, to which Shiro nodded and pressed the button. His Echo 3 was registered, but as it did, a user agreement was seen.
"Ogh, a user agreement. Boring! Don't worry, corporations have our best interests at heart. Except Dahl. And Hyperion… eh-eh, never mind." Claptrap said, trying not to deter Shiro, that the young teen decided to read the user agreement.
USER ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
Ver. 31652389432 B
Please read the License Agreement carefully. You must Accept to continue
ECHOT END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT
ATTENTION: SIGNATORY (HENCEFORTH REFERRED TO AS "USER") MUST CAREFULLY READ THIS AGREEMENT ("THE AGREEMENT") BEFORE ACTIVATING OR CONNECTING TO DAHL'S ECHO NETWORK DEVICES AND PLATFORMS. IF YOU CANNOT READ, DROP THE ECHO COMMUNICATION DEVICE("THE DEVICE") AND WALK AWAY IMMEDIATELY.
FAILURE TO DO SO, OR FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH ALL TERMS OF THE AGREEMENT, WILL RESULT IN TERMINATION OF USER, SERVICE, AND USER-SERVICE
Look alive, soldier! Thank you for your enlistment in Dahl's ("the Company", "we", or "us") intergalactic Telecommunications network("ECHONET", "ECHO", "the Net"; formerly "Riftspace", "the Spline", and "MercTel: A Cyber-Dahl Joint"). This ECHO user agreement is a legal Document that sets forth and provides your permissions And obligations as a user of ECHO services and platforms From Dahl Corporation ("Dahl"). If you reside or operate on Pandora, the Colony Worlds, or any other occupied astral body ("planet", "world", "megastructures (artificial)", "megastructures (sentient)", et al.), or are Trapped in a superposition state of life and death Between proprietary resurrections ("respawns"), note that
Except as otherwise stated, the term "legal", as used in this Document, can, at Dahl's discretion, mean and refer to, Individually or in any combination: (1) defined and Protected by Core law; (2) defined, protected, and Proactively enforced by Dahl's private military forces (The Legion", "Project Blackrakk", "Thresher Company", et al.); or (3) defined and implied to be protected by personal threat of injury, death, or insult as per "Pandoran common law and lawlessness" set forth by "Chieftain Oort" in the landmark statutory case "Psycho (Anonymous) v. Bandit (Recently Legless Gary)".
The Company reserves the right, in its sole discretion, to Change, modify, alter, revise, paraphrase, restate, change, Adjust, obscure, obfuscate, obliterate, reinstate, contradict, Modulate, refine, redefine, or otherwise defy the scrutiny And understanding of the Agreement at any time, and you Agree to be bound by such terminological distortions. Any Such changes will be effective immediately following Posting on the network, and your continued use of the ECHO device, platform, and network will constitute your Acceptance of and agreement to such changes, as well as Implicit subscription to the Digby Vermouth "Dig's Gigs" Secret concert subscription service. If you object to any Change, your objection constitutes an objection to Digby Vermouth, the "Dig's Gigs" subscription service, and the Spirit of hyper-jazz, in which case Dahl requests you cease Using the ECHO device, platform, and service immediately, You snob.
Failure on the part of the company to enforce a provision Of this Agreement shall not be construed as a (1) waiver of Such provision, or (2) diminishment of any authority to Enforce such provisions. Failure on the part of the user to Report the Company's failure to enforce a provision to the Company for express provisional enforcement shall be Construed as the user's waiver of protection against Immediate and indefinite injunctive or other equitable Relief to be sought by the Company at its discretion.
You Acknowledge and agree to be responsible for obtaining and maintaining all phones, computer hardware, mobiled evices, geocaches ("dead drops"), shared dreamspaces,and mailboxes necessary for the Company's continually Permitted access to any personal point of contact.
You Agree that the provisions of this Agreement, that by their Nature should survive termination, will survive any Termination of the Agreement, as well as persisting beyond Any termination of the user with assumptive access to Proprietary resurrection.
After skimming through the mind-numbing user agreement, Shiro hit "accept," officially registering his Echo device. "Good thing I won't be here long. Just need to grab some weapons, and a shield, then I'm out," he muttered under his breath.
Turning his attention back to Claptrap, Shiro asked, "Hey, know anyone who can hook me up with some firearms and a shield?"
Claptrap, ever eager, nodded enthusiastically.
"Wait, you mean you came to Pandora without a firearm or even a shield?!" Claptrap exclaimed, his tone a mix of surprise and irritation. "Seriously, what kind of teenager shows up here empty-handed? You'd think someone your age would at least have the basics!"
"Look, can you stop asking questions and help me?!" Shiro yelled, which Claptrap understood. Claptrap quickly told him where to look. "Head to 'The Droughts' and you can get the supplies you need to survive, Pandora," Claptrap said, to which Shiro nodded. He then snapped his fingers, and another portal opened, which showed 'The Droughts.' Both Shiro and Claptrap went through the portal, which closed behind him. Both Shiro and Claptrap found themselves in a dump that had a vending machine that said Guns that depicted a rocket launcher with arms, wearing a helmet, and holding a rifle while saluting. Also, at the bottom of the vending machine depicted a man with a mustache. Surrounding the mustache man was the company name Marcus Mutation Inc.
"Alright, time to grab myself a weapon!" Shiro said confidently, scanning the dingy shop in Pandora. He reached for his pockets and froze. "Wait... I don't have any money," he muttered, the realization hitting him like a freight train.
Claptrap rolled over, his single eye blinking with what could only be described as robotic smugness. "Really? You came all the way to Pandora with no cash and expected to just buy a gun? Wow, you must not be the brightest bulb in the-"
Shiro snapped his glare to Claptrap, his eyes narrowing. Claptrap's voice trailed off as he noticed the teenager's expression darken.
"Uh, hey, whoa!" Claptrap stammered, backing up a little, his voice wavering. "No need to look at me like that! We're friends, right? Heh... right?"
Shiro stepped forward, towering over the quirky robot, his shadow looming large. Claptrap's metal frame rattled. "H-Hey, okay, okay! M-Maybe I can pull some strings and help you out? No need to scare a poor little bot!" Claptrap wheezed, visibly trembling.
Shiro smirked, crossing his arms. "That's more like it."
Claptrap, not wanting to get on Shiro's bad side, went over to a dumpster and quickly rummaged through it, pulling out a revolver that had a slick, old-western aesthetic with ornate golden engravings on the barrel and grip. Shiro grabbed it, and his Echo 3 showed it was a Daisy Marshal, which shocked him as he recalled the gun was pretty good to use; however, it was purple, meaning it was powerful but not as powerful as legendary counterpart.
"Well, damn, call me a jabber's uncle. You were hiding a Daisy Marshal in a dumpster?" Shiro asked, still wide-eyed as he stared at Claptrap in disbelief.
"Funny enough," Claptrap replied, his tone casual, "I found it in a Skagg pile. I figured I'd hold onto it. Never know when a Vault Hunter might need a little motivation to work with me."
Shiro nodded, processing the bizarre yet oddly fitting explanation. "Makes sense."
"You got any ammo for it?" he asked, eyeing the revolver.
Claptrap gave an enthusiastic nod and rummaged through his storage compartment, producing a yellow box of pistol ammo. "Here ya go! 18 rounds should do the trick."
Taking the box, Shiro quickly loaded the bullets into the revolver's cylinder, the metal clicking in place and filling the air as he prepared for whatever Pandora threw at them next.
"Okay, now that I have a weapon, I only need a shield. Hey, Clap, by any chance, do you have a shield on you?" Shiro asked, to which Claptrap sadly shook his head no.
"Sorry, kid, no shield for you," Claptrap chirped, his robotic eye gleaming with mischief. "But hey, I've got an idea! There's a bunch of bandits nearby, probably carrying some shields. If you take them out, you might get lucky. Just be careful. Going shieldless is a quick way to get yourself killed. These psychos are part of that crazy cult, the Children of the Vault, or COV. You know how they are."
Shiro frowned but nodded. He knew this wasn't going to be easy. He glanced down at his weapon, tightening his grip. He was really in Borderlands 3. And worse, he knew exactly where in the story he was.
"Thanks for the heads-up, Clap. One more thing," Shiro added, voice steady despite the whirlwind of thoughts in his head. "Have any Vault Hunters shown up on Pandora?"
Claptrap bobbed excitedly. "Oh, you bet! Four of my finest minions are out on a mission right now, straight from the Crimson Raiders. They're helping my buddy Tannis recharge the Vault Key, which is a map of other Vaults in the universe. Oh, but hey, keep that on the down-low, okay?"
Shiro's frown deepened as he scanned the horizon. "Chapter 4," he thought. That meant time was running out. He didn't have the luxury of waiting around he knew if he wasted time Lilith would lose her siren powers. "Fuck... time to do a speed run."
He dug into his jacket and pulled out his Oni Mask. With one smooth motion, he slipped it over his face.
"Like the song says, ain't no rest for the wicked," Shiro muttered, his voice muffled slightly behind the mask. He pulled up his map on the Echo 3, marked the bandit camp near the radio tower spewing COV propaganda, and tucked the map away. "Money doesn't grow on trees, but bodies pile up just fine."
With a flick of his wrist, Shiro created a portal. The air crackled with energy as the rift between worlds tore open. He stepped through, his surroundings changing instantly. One second he was standing on a dusty cliffside, the next, he was crouching in the shadow of a crumbling building at the edge of the bandit camp.
The first thing he noticed? The bandits were loud. And ugly. They always were. Scattered around the camp, they hollered at one another while COV banners flapped in the wind. A massive radio tower stood in the middle, spewing nonsense about the Great Calypso Twins.
Shiro's hand slipped to the revolver at his side. The Daisy Marshal a beauty of a Jakobs pistol. It gleamed in the dim light, its ornate engravings catching his eye. Shiro had never fired a gun before, but how hard could it be? Point, shoot, bang. Easy, right?
He popped the chamber open. Eighteen bullets. "Gotta make these count," he whispered, closing the chamber with a click.
Shiro stepped out from cover, aiming the Daisy Marshal at the nearest bandit, who was leaning against the side of a shack, smoking. Shiro squeezed the trigger and BANG, but instead of the satisfying thud of a body hitting the ground, the bandit shrieked and grabbed his ear. Shiro winced.
"Son of a-!" the bandit yelled, clutching at the side of his head where Shiro had just barely grazed him.
"Alright, so aiming is harder than it looks," Shiro muttered, ducking back behind cover as the bandit's buddies started looking around for the shooter. His hands were shaking this was harder than he'd expected. He took a deep breath, popping out from behind the wall just long enough to line up a shot.
The Daisy Marshal barked again, and this time, the bullet found its mark. The bandit's head snapped back, and Shiro grinned beneath the Oni Mask as he watched the body crumple to the dirt. He didn't even have time to enjoy the small victory before the rest of the camp was on alert.
"Shit. So much for stealth."
Bandits charged his way, yelling obscenities and firing blindly. Shiro ducked and weaved, moving from cover to cover, his heart pounding in his chest. He raised the Daisy Marshal and fired again. The recoil almost knocked the gun from his hand, but the bullet ricocheted, slamming into a second bandit.
"Okay, okay, maybe I'm not so bad at this," Shiro said, trying to sound confident. A third bandit sprinted at him, screaming something about the Calypsos. Shiro panicked, squeezing the trigger three times in quick succession. The shots went wild, missing completely, but one of the ricochets hit a fire barrel by the radio tower. The explosion was massive, sending bandits flying through the air like ragdolls.
Shiro stumbled back, coughing through the dust. "Hell yeah, now that's what I call improvising!" He laughed, adrenaline surging through his veins.
More bandits poured in, but Shiro wasn't backing down. He flicked open the chamber, and counted the bullets. Ten left. He sprinted forward, zig-zagging between the chaos, vaulting over debris. A portal shimmered to life in front of him, and Shiro dove through it, reappearing behind a group of unsuspecting bandits.
"Boo," he growled, pulling the trigger.
The Daisy Marshal roared again, and in one smooth motion, Shiro dropped two more bandits. The ricochet from the second shot hit a third, dropping him before he could even react.
Shiro twirled the revolver, trying to look cool but almost fumbling it. "Alright, note to self," he muttered, catching the gun before it hit the dirt, "Maybe practice the spin thing later."
The last bandit was seen trying to escape, but Shiro wasn't having it. Shiro took a deep breath and created another portal, stepping through and appearing on top of the radio tower. He looked down at the chaos below, grinning beneath his mask.
"I am the wandering Oni," Shiro whispered to himself, gripping the revolver tighter, the weight of it suddenly feeling heavier in his hands. He tried to push the unease down, focusing on the job at hand. "And you guys? You're just target practice."
His hands were shaking, but he aimed down at the last few bandits anyway. He squeezed the trigger BANG, he familiar roar of the Daisy Marshal echoed across the Droughts, and the bandit dropped like a sack of potatoes. But this time, something was different. As the bandit's body hit the ground, Shiro saw the lifeless eyes staring up at him, and a wave of nausea hit him like a freight train.
The gun suddenly felt cold, too real in his hands. This wasn't a game. These weren't just pixels or some respawning NPCs. These were people. Real, flesh-and-blood people. And he had just ended their lives.
His stomach churned, the adrenaline turning into something sickening. His mask felt suffocating. Shiro staggered back, slipping off the ledge of the radio tower and landing hard on the ground below. The impact knocked the wind out of him, but it wasn't enough to stop the flood of emotions. He ripped off the Oni Mask, gasping for air, and then, without warning he doubled over and puked.
The bile stung his throat, the acidic taste mixing with the dust and grime of Pandora. His entire body shook, and he felt like a scared, powerless kid for a moment.
"This isn't the same... it's not like the game..." he whispered hoarsely between heaves. His hands were shaking uncontrollably, fingers still wrapped tightly around the Daisy Marshal. The revolver suddenly felt foreign, like a weapon of death.
He tried to wipe his mouth, but his fingers were covered in dirt and blood. "Fuck… this is real." The realization hit him harder than the recoil from the gun.
Shiro leaned back against the radio tower, his breath ragged, and stared at the bodies scattered across the camp. The ones he'd killed. He knew in the games Bandits were just psychopaths in the game, but in this universe, these were real people.
"Get it together. Just loot the corps and grab their gear and get ready to stop those fucking Clapso twins." Shiro then put on his mask and started looting the area.
Shiro wiped the sweat from his brow, his eyes locking onto the bodies scattered across the desolate camp. He moved cautiously, the adrenaline still coursing through his veins. The Daisy Marshal in his grip felt heavier, like a reminder of the chaos he'd just unleashed. The sounds of gunfire had ceased, but the ringing in his ears echoed faintly, a ghost of the battle he'd barely survived.
He crouched by the nearest bandit, forcing himself to focus. No more hesitation. He had to move quickly before the Clapso Twins' goons came looking for their missing comrades. His fingers rummaged through the pockets of the dead man. A handful of money, some spare ammo for the Marshal, and... His hand brushed something smooth and metallic.
"Jackpot," Shiro muttered under his breath.
It was an energy shield, and not just any shield. Shiro studied the hexagonal patterns flickering on the device, the edges glowing with a faint, corrosive green light. The screen blinked, displaying its stats: Majestic Acid Nova Shield. He smirked this thing packed a punch. The shield had a massive capacity and would release a corrosive nova when depleted. Perfect for crowd control against the relentless psycho hordes. He strapped it on his arm, the familiar hum of its charge syncing with his heartbeat.
Next, he moved to the second body a woman, barely older than him. Her gun caught his eye as it was a Dayummd Purferator. The thing was a beast, a barrel as thick as his forearm and wrapped in glowing neon cables. The ammo counter flickered at 754, and the description read, 32% weapon damage. The magazine was seemingly endless, but the trade-off? The weapon would overheat. Shiro grinned. "I'll just need to make sure it doesn't over heat. Still one hell of a gun."
With a satisfying click, he slung the Purferator over his shoulder. He had seen weapons like this in the game but holding it now feeling its weight it all felt more intense. More... real.
His eyes flickered toward the final body, the biggest of the bunch. This guy looked like a tank in human form, all muscle and bad attitude. Shiro bent down and reached toward his belt. "Come on, give me something good."
His fingers curled around a strange device it was heavy, cold to the touch, and intricately designed. The screen flashed the name Generator Stim Splitter Longbow. Shiro whistled low, impressed. This was no ordinary grenade. The grenades teleported directly to their destination, detonating on impact. Not only that, it had a transfusion effect, healing shields, and health based on the damage dealt. A real game-changer in a fight. Shiro almost couldn't believe his luck.
The sound of shifting rubble caught his attention. Shiro stood up quickly, his fingers tightening on the grip of the Daisy Marshal. His eyes scanned the camp, but nothing stirred. Maybe it's just the wind. Still, his pulse raced. He needed to stay sharp. He pocketed the money he found and loaded the extra ammo into his inventory, adjusting his mask as he did.
The Clapso Twins were still out there, and time wasn't on his side. With the Majestic Acid Nova Shield strapped to his arm, the Dayummd Purferator slung over his shoulder, and the Generator Stim Splitter Longbow secured to his side, Shiro felt ready. Armed to the teeth, he was no longer just a player in someone else's game he was the threat. Shiro was ready as he was going to fuck them over.
He looked down one last time at the bodies he'd looted, a strange mix of guilt and resolve churning in his gut. "This isn't like anything like the game," he whispered, turning toward the horizon. "But fuck it I'm gonna finish it." With renewed determination, Shiro marched forward.
"Time to change the script," Shiro Echo 3 then picks up a transmission and hears a familiar female voice. "I can't believe we are going to Promethea! It'll be good to see some new sites and lays and some new lays. Going to teach them city boys some things they only see in Nature documentaries." Shiro smiled as she knew it was Ellie Hodunk, older sister to his other favorite Hodunk Scooter.
"Shit, I guess I took too long than I expected. Time to head to Raider's Drydock. And stop the twins from taking Lilith's powers." Shiro then snaps his finger and creates a portal. Shiro quickly heads through and leaves the radio tower.
Raider's Drydock
At the Raider's Drydock, two people were seen surrounding one familiar red-haired siren. Standing in the middle was none other than Lilith, leader of the Crimson Raider and also the former bandit Firehawk. Now, surrounding her on her right side was a tall man in his early twenties. He was covered in scars and wore a sleeveless, long trench coat adorned with fur around the shoulders, exuding a rugged, wasteland-chic style. His exposed chest reveals glowing red lines, marks of his power, hinting at his deep connection to the Eridian artifacts. The right side of his body is cybernetic, with his mechanical arm glowing faintly with red lights, emphasizing high-tech augmentation. His pants are military-style with pockets and straps, completed with heavy-duty boots. His dark hair is messy, and his facial expression always seems to carry a cocky smirk. This asshat was none other than Troy Calypso.
Now, the second person on Lilith's left side was a woman in her early twenties, slightly shorter than Troy. She sports a sleeveless, fitted coat adorned with large shoulder pads and a high collar lined with fur that gives her an air of royalty. The colors of her outfit are dark and practical, but the glowing blue tattoos along her arm. Her short, platinum-blonde hair is shaved on one side, while the other side falls dramatically over one eye, adding a sharp, rebellious edge to her look. Her pants are torn and worn but clearly durable, strapped and buckled to handle any adventure, with boots that look like they've seen better days. This was the bitch who stole Lilith's powers, Tyreen Calypso.
"Firehawk. Just give me the map." Tyreen asked, looking annoyed which Lilith held the Vault Map and glared at her.
"No way," Lilith said, which made Tyreen smiled. "Cool, LETS DO THIS!" Tyreen then uses her Siren powers to blast Lilith, making her fall to the ground while losing the map. Troy uses his tattooed arm to catch the Vault map and then does the trick, throwing it back into the air with his robotic arm to catch the map. He smiles. "Got it," Troy activates the drone camera embedded in his cybernetic limb, broadcasting the scene to their cult of fanatical followers. The camera shows both Sirens duking it blasting eachother; however, it seems Lilith was on the receiving end as she was blasted by Tyreen, which made Troy laugh. "Ohoohoohoo, this is gold!"
Tyreen was seen making an energy orb, but before she could use Lilith raised her arm and slammed it down, causing a fire vortex to appear, sending Tyreen flying before crashing onto the ground. Lilith then stood up, and as she did, the drone was still recording her. She gets annoyed and kicks it away, which then points to Troy, who is clutching onto the Vault Map, which then zooms on his face, showing he is looking a bit nervous. Suddenly Lilith teleports behind him, and suckers punches him in the face making him fall to the floor. The drone continued to record the reaction as Lilith was over to him. As she walked over, Troy rolled to his side and puts his hand out showing he was surrendering. Lilith then notices the glowing tattoos on his arm, an oddity that causes her to look confused. "You're a siren?"
Troy, panting and in pain, chuckles darkly. "Heh, Yeah... well... Runs in the family." As Lilith looked at the supposed Male Siren, Tyreen was seen back at full strength and heading toward the red-haired Siren.
As Tyreen got closer in the shadows, Shiro, wearing his Oni mask, watched nervously. As he has been hiding the entire time behind one of the large containers. Shiro's holding tight at his collapsible staff, and his heartbeat quickens as the scene unfolds before him.
"Get it together, Shiro, or you will be the reason Maya dies." His eyes widen as Tyreen prepares to leech Lilith's powers. Shiro grips his staff tightly, ready to intervene, when suddenly a portal opens above Tyreen, and a Skag drops through, landing directly on top of her, knocking her flat on her back.
Shiro's jaw drops as he was wondering where he sent the Skag. "Well, that was completely random but not unwelcome."
Tyreen shrieks in frustration, pushing the Skag off her, blasting it with Siren energy to get it away. In the meantime, Lilith just looks in shock, wondering what the hell was going on. Suddenly, the sounds of a war cry was heard as Shiro was seen rushing towards the down Troy. "I have the shiniest meat bicycle!" Shiro yelled, quoting Kreig, his favorite Psycho Vault Hunter.
Shiro swings his staff down, slicing through Troy's cybernetic arm, before kicking it away. Troy yells in pain as his cybernetic limb is cut off. "Sorry, asshole, no more vibrating function for you!" Shiro smiling under his mask.
"You son of-" Before he can finish, Shiro delivers a brutal kick to Troy's groin, causing him to let out a high-pitched squeal and cover his private area in pain. "You know If I had a nickel for every time I kicked an asshole in the groin, I have two nickels which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice." Shiro said to himself before shrugging his shoulders.
As Troy continued to hold his manhood, Tyreen blasted the Skag into pieces and once it was dead, saw her brother writhing on the ground, holding his privates. Her rage boils over.
"You, Mother fucker!"
She lunges toward Shiro, hand outstretched, ready to leech him. Shiro, eyes wide in panic, quickly opens another portal which the Siren gets sucked into. Shiro then sighs with relief before turning to Troy and then snaps his finger, which a portal opens under him, sucking him before closing.
"Well, thank god that is over." Shiro sighed with relief as he changed the plot of the story. However, he then notices Lilith looking shocked at what just happened. "Uh, hi there." Shiro awkwardly waved at Lilith, but before she could say anything, a horde of bandits flooded into the drydock, drawn by the broadcast and the mockery of their twin gods. They rush toward Shiro and Lilith, yelling like maniacs and ready to kill.
"Oh fuck, this is not good!" Shiro looking scared under his mask and got ready to pull his gun out; however, before that could happen, the doors to the drydock were lowered, and coming out of the docks were the four Vault Hunters that came to Pandora.
"Oh fuck yeah!" Shiro cheered, seeing the Vault hunters. The first Vault Hunter to be seen was the soldier Moze in her Iron Bear mech stomping into the battle. Her attire consisted of a cropped combat jacket, reinforced armored pants, and combat boots. Her sleeveless arms are muscular and tattooed, showing she's been through some serious fights.
"Hey, bandits, meet Iron Bear!" she shouts as she pulls the trigger, sending a barrage of rockets into the crowd of bandits. The explosions ripped through the bandits, sending limbs and blood flying in every direction.
Shiro looked amazed at the carnage and cheered as he saw the next Vault Hunter, Zane. The cool and calculating in his sleek, futuristic assassin operative. His yellow jacket is lined with high-tech gadgetry, and his white hair gives him a roguish look. He adjusts his cybernetic eye implant before deploying his drone and barrier, which create a tactical wall of death as he opens fire.
"Sorry, folks, but this party's invitation-only," Zane smirks, his pistol sending headshots that leave gory trails of blood in the air.
"You know I should see a therapist after this but fuck it this is awesome!" Shiro continued to which he then saw the the third Vault Hunter Amara. The Siren's tattoos glowing a bright blue, her powerful arms flexing as she charges into the fray.
She wears a black and purple vest, leather pants, and combat boots, and her eyes gleam with the thrill of battle. With a roar, Amara summons her Phaseslam, punching the ground and sending Siren fists smashing through multiple bandits at once. The bandits' bodies are ripped apart, their bones cracking audibly as they're crushed into the ground.
"Now that's what I call a workout!" Amara grins as she punches another bandit so hard his head explodes. Shiro winced seeing the carnage but then saw the final Vault Hunter FL4K.
The Beastmaster emerges from the shadows, draped in a ragged, torn cloak. His back is loaded with packs and a sniper rifle, and his glowing eyes gleam beneath his hood. His beast companions snarl beside him, ready for blood. His beasts were a Skag, Jabber, and Spiderant.
FL4K raised his hand, and his three beasts charged forward, tearing into the bandits' flesh.
"Hunt them all," FL4K commanded, as he picks off stragglers with precise headshots from his sniper rifle. Blood spurts from the bandits as they fall, one by one, their bodies torn apart by his beasts and bullets alike.
As the Vault Hunters continued to kill the bandits, Shiro decided to step up and pulls out his newest toys. "Fuck it. Morality be damn time to kill some psychos!" Shiro then uses his grenade mod, which a grenade digitizes appearing in his hand. He then throws a longbow at one of the Fanatic that was shooting from far away. The grenade was seen flying in the air, but it looked like it wouldn't even hit the bandit however, the grenade teleported and then made contact causing the bandit to blow the fuck up into chunky red meat.
"How you like-" Shiro didn't get to finish as a bandit shot him and fell to the ground, his shield holding but twenty five percent of it was down. Shiro winced in pain as he felt the gun shot. He was happy he was alive, but hell did it hurt to get shot. While on the ground, Shiro saw five psychos heading his way.
"Kill the devil for kicking for hurting the Twin Gods!" The psycho said, which the other cheered. Shiro was scared out of his mind and quickly grabbed the Dayummd Purferator from his shoulder and then pulled the rip cord, starting it before firing several bullets at them. The bullets made their mark, but sadly, the bullets didn't kill them as the Psychos had huge pain tolerance.
"Oh shit…." Shiro said as the Psychos started attack him. One of the Psychos kicks his rifle away and started to beat him relentlessly, which the teenager could only cover up to try to minimize the pain. His shield was seen lowering at a fast rate and as it got closer one of the Pyscho was about to use his saw blades to kill Shiro.
"Die, devil!" The Psycho shouted raising the blade ready to swing it down on him but before that could happen, Shiro's shield was depleted, which released a corrosive nova that hits all the bandits, causing them to scream in pain as their bodies melted into goo. Shiro coughed in pain and got up and sighed with relief that they were dead.
"Fucking hell that was horrible," as the teenager got up he didn't notice that one of the Psyscho was on one of the containers. The bandit holds his razor axe and then leaps over to him ready to end him. "For the twin gods!" The Pyscho yelled which Shiro turns around in horror and tries to pull out his other gun but before that could happen the Psycho was blasted and turned to ash by Lilith.
"You okay," Lilith asked which Shiro puts a thumbs up but as he did he saw the drone was still recording the entire event which the teenager summons his Daisy Mashall and then points the pistol at the drone. "Shows over assholes," Shiro then shoots the drone cutting off the live stream. Shiro then sighs with relief before lifting up his mask to show only his mouth before vomiting on the ground after all the carnage he just witnessed. Shiro then wipes his mouth and then turns to Lilith.
"Sorry, just lost much lunch there," Shiro said, which Lilith looked at the teenager and nodded her head. "So, kid got a name," the red siren asked, to which Shiro nodded. "The name is Oni. I suggest you grab the Vault Map and head to the ship if you plan to get a head start on those so-called twin gods."
Lilith nodded and grabbed the Vault Key, and as she did, Shiro created a portal, surprising everyone. "Before anyone asks, I am no siren; I just got lucky and hit the lottery to go anywhere without the need for fast travel. Now come on." Shiro said, and everyone nodded and quickly headed into the portal.
Sanctuary III
The Sanctuary III, the ship seen in Borderlands 3, helps navigate the galaxy. Shiro was seen on the bridge with Lilith and the four Vault hunters.
"Hey, thanks for taking those assholes down a peg," Lilith said which Shiro nodded his head. Amara steps up, cracking her knuckles with a grin. "Not bad, kid. You've got some moves."
Zane raises an eyebrow and smirks. "Yeah, dirty moves, but hey, whatever works."
"I can tell the kid is a greenhorn but shows promise if trained right," Moze said, and the other Vault Hunters agreed.
"My sensors show a strange energy surrounding the boy, and it seems my beats can also pick up on it." F4LK said as his beasts just stared at Shiro, not in a threatening manner or a welcoming one.
"Hey, I just saved your leader's ass from getting her siren powers stolen. The least you can do is hear me out. Besides, Claptrap can vogue for me that I am helpful since I saved his robotic ass." Shiro said, and all of them just looked at him in confusion.
"Hold on, lad. You met that annoying steward bot?" Zane asked, and Shiro nodded.
"Yeah, I met that tortilla-shaped robotic getting chased by the same Skag that attacked that leech of a siren. Fucking yellow bastard nearly got me killed, but we are cool." Shiro said that everyone looked at the teen and nodded their heads as they could see the stupid robot pulling a stunt like that.
"Anyway, since I am being generous, I know what the twins are up to. However, the information is going to cost you some Storage Deck Upgrades." When Shiro said that Lilith and the Vault Hunters looked skeptical, but F4LK spoke up.
"The young male is not lying as his pheromone is not showing indication of lying." The robotic beast master said, which Lilith sighs and nodded her head.
"Excellent, we all not the COV are looking for the Vault however if they plan to pull this off they are going to be allying themselves with heavy hitters." Shiro said which made Lilith and the Vault Hunters frown hearing this information.
"Who are they planning on working for?" Moze asked, and Shiro smiled under his mask and continued to speak. " The Ceo of Maliwan Katagawa Jr and Aurelia Hammerlock." Everyone looks shocked hearing this and before Lilith could say any, Shiro continued to speak.
"Before you ask why those two, simply the COV has a large cult following and, with their numbers, they can easily throw planets into utter chaos. For Katagawa Jr, he wants the Atlas Cooperation to merge with Maliwan. As for Aurelia, she wants to take over the Jackob Cooperation just to piss off Hammerlock since he is dating the Ceo's son Wainwright Jakobs."
As Shiro was done speaking, the others looked shocked, and Lillith and the Vault Hunters knew they needed to work fast. "I knew those twins were troubled, but I wanted to get the attention of those two. This sounds like a shit show waiting to happen." Lilith said, to which everyone agreed.
"Now that I have given you the information, I would like those Storage Deck Upgrades, please," Shiro asked, which Lilith nodded and then led him out of the bridge to get his rewards. "I may have fucked cannon, but hell, those assholes had it coming." Shiro could only smile as he just screwed over the most hated characters in the Borderlands series.
Items and Weapons collected
The Spectacular Spider-Man: Fancy Dans collapsible staff.
Borderlands: Daisy Marshall Pistol, Majestic Acid Nova Shield, Dayummd Purferator, Generator Stim Splitter Longbow, and Echo 3.
Sorry for taking so long to update. I wanted to make this chapter fun and comedic since this is Borderlands. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next one I plan to make is going to be fun.