Matthew wasn't complaining in the slightest, but it had been a long week. No one had left the house except for when Antonio wanted to go to Church. Matthew still found it flattering that he had such an effect on Antonio, who apparently hadn't attended MASS in years until he thought an angel talked him down from jumping that day. Matthew had to say, he was somehow thankful that Antonio was doing much better, all things considered.
Apart from that, not even Alfred left the house and any errands or chores of his just got lumped onto Matthew, because as always the obvious solution was to just make things Matthew's problem. He was always there when Alfred needed him. Matthew wanted to say no and see what would happen, but he knew Alfred would just be insistent and even though giving in to his brother's desires made him feel like some kind of puppet... Matthew still did it knowing damn well Alfred would never do the same for him.
But Matthew did get something out of it. Not only did it get him out of the house, but he also got to see how greater society was coping with the new status quo. Plus it gave him the opportunity to buy newspapers which were full of new discussions daily, giving constant updates from the professional end. Now he had a paper advertising Ludwig's big funeral sitting in his drawer along with every other highlight from his career.
Matthew enjoyed the extreme contrast between the professionalism of new outlets and the internet, which had crazy theories coming in and crazier individuals. Or they were just shitposts. Either way, entertaining. Or maybe his sense of humour and attention span was just broken...
Besides, there were a lot of posts about just general discussion. Even if the Trail Killer wasn't active now and going out every night, he didn't need to be. Matthew the chaos he caused and there was no shortage of entertainment! Besides, he could always make a comeback whenever he pleased... But not until he was inspired. There was no rush and the thrill had yet to fade.
In fact, with the funeral coming up he had a feeling it was just getting started.
The day of the funeral arrived and the mood could be felt throughout the house. Apparently, no one had any foresight because it took until the day of the funeral to realise no one had packed any clothes that could pass as traditional mourning attire. Sure, the event was made out to be extremely casual but as Ludwig's friends and family, they all wanted to dress as respectfully as possible to mourn their grief.
Because of that it meant they had to leave even earlier than planned, cutting it close to stop by everyone's houses and still arrive early so the Chief could explain the role Gilbert and Feliciano were playing to them.
Matthew was ready and waiting, dressed in clean casual black clothes and left to imagine what was going to happen as everyone got ready - or as ready as they could without the clothes. The shower had been running non-stop since the sun came up and Matthew wondered if there was any hot water left before pushing that thought aside in favour of mentally preparing. The funeral advertising had tremendous reach and Matthew hoped the police had shot themselves in the foot with this idea because there would be far too many people to monitor if half the city showed up.
But the Chief wanted to bait a reaction out of him and Matthew had to imagine what his first instinctual and truthful reaction would be. Honestly, he thought he wouldn't react at all and keep his face plain because expressing what he felt on the outside was a no-no. But then he thought maybe he'd feel the need to act like everyone around him and layer on the sadness thick. One of those two prepared reactions would probably occur naturally if he didn't know he was going to be watched.
Maybe if he had a subtle reaction, of showing just a little bit of sadness as if it were genuine, he would be overlooked. But Matthew wasn't worried. His facade was unmatched and not even Ludwig, who created the criminal profile for his own murderer, could see past it.
Matthew was loitering in the living room waiting for the moment Alfred decided he was ready when his brother came out of his room while tugging on his shirt.
"Uh, Mattie," Alfred said like he only just remembered his brother there. "Do I look alright?"
Alfred was dressed in all black, smart casual and without his signature jacket for once, which spoke of the severity of the situation.
"You look fine," Matthew reassured.
"Okay, cool. I'm ready to go." Alfred went to grab his keys and motioned for everyone else to get going. "See you when we get back."
Matthew blinked and stood up, unable to lean casually as he glanced at Alfred and his friends with furrowed eyebrows and a naked look of betrayal. It was like there was something unspoken that had happened between them all and as always, Matthew was oblivious to it. It was like they had all just in unison assumed that Matthew wasn't coming. Matthew bit his tongue because he wasn't going to give them the benefit of the doubt and consider that maybe it was because he had never indicated that he had wanted to come when none of them had asked! He never indicated he didn't want to come and sue him for not realising he was supposed to realise what they would assume and counter it by acting.
"I'm coming," Matthew stated. Did Alfred not notice Matthew was wearing black too?
"Oh," Alfred remarked with a pause. "Ah, okay. I've only got five seats in my car though..."
"We can take my car, Alfred?" Kiku added politely. "I don't mind driving."
"That's a good idea," Antonio nodded. "If we split up we won't take as long to get dressed and get to the funeral."
"Yeah, I guess we'll do that," Alfred swung his keys decisively. "I'll go with Toni and Gil cus they're going to the same place, Kiku you take Feli and Mattie."
So that's how Matthew found himself sitting in the back of Kiku's car, unsurprisingly a Japanese model. It was cuter than Alfred's American-made car, which sped off the second all the passengers were in and the doors were closed. Matthew heard Kiku 'tisk' in disapproval as he began driving with more respect for common sense and road safety.
"I hope Gil's going to be okay," Feliciano said, his voice quiet and his posture tight.
Kiku's blank eyes were focused on the road, so Matthew leaned in.
"I'm sure he will be. It won't be long until you see him again."
Kiku stopped by Feliciano's house first giving him time to run in and get changed, albeit half in the car, before Kiku drove to his own. They eventually made it to their final destination to see a familiar car waiting in the parking lot.
"Took ya long enough." Was the first thing Alfred said with a smirk, leaning on the side of his car. He, Antonio and Gilbert were all sipping drinks, most likely bought from going through a drive-through.
Being a couple of hours early, they were the only few cars parked. But Matthew had to assume it was only a matter of time before the giant parking lot was full of activity.
Not wanting to linger around for long, the group went to find the Chief. At the narrow entrance, Matthew noticed a sign-in sheet being set up that Alfred foolishly jumped at the opportunity to 'autograph'.
"Excuse me, what's this for?" Antonio questioned the officer who was sitting at the booth with the sheet.
The officer went on to explain that it was 'supposed to' track numbers for some administrative reason, which sounded like it was being read off of a script and was most likely bullshit. There was a small camera attached to the booth and Matthew knew that since this funeral was an exclusive event, that camera wasn't there to stream it. It had to have another purpose...
He had to assume more cameras would be recording the entire event and Matthew would have to keep that in mind. The camera at the booth was likely to get faces to go with names so anyone who stood out to the police could be investigated. Matthew had to admit it was clever.
But not clever enough when their group wasn't made to sign it, not when another officer came along... accompanied by the Chief of Police.
The aura of the group shifted into something uncomfortable as the Chief's intimidating and unwelcoming presence suffocated any semblance of calm and the room became tense. Any relaxed demeanour Gilbert had immediately vanished as he stiffened and his pale face somehow lost even more blood. He wasn't the only one. Feliciano shrunk back, Antonio and Alfred put on serious faces while Kiku hardly changed at all, only keeping his eyes on the ground. Matthew just kept his face a pleasant neutral, because while he wasn't close to Ludwig, he wanted to support his friends and he had no reason to think negatively about the police... But he still shifted to display discomfort, because he wasn't going to stand out from the flock.
"Good morning, thank you all for coming," The man said formally, his deep voice stern. "I need Gilbert and Feliciano to come with me now. The rest of you can sit wherever you'd like but stay quiet and don't interfere as we rehearse."
"Yup, got it," Alfred said, his voice a little higher pitched than usual.
Matthew became annoyed when Gilbert shoved his empty drink into him, wordlessly expecting him to take it and dispose of it so he could go with his Grandfather. Matthew didn't show his annoyance though, grabbing the drink as any loyal friend would and ignoring the moisture on his shirt.
"You didn't have anything more appropriate to wear?" The Chief stared down at his Grandson, dressed in what would be considered a reach for 'smart casual' let alone 'formal', who immediately went red.
"It's black and formal! It's the best I had." Gilbert retorted defensively. "I wasn't going to take Ludwig's clothes."
"I suppose your voice still sounds sympathetic, but at least you'll be understood," Chief Beilschmidt noted, almost sounding disappointed it wasn't worse as he turned to walk away. "Now, come with me, there's something I want you to do before we go through a rehearsal."
"Where are we going?" Gilbert asked in apprehension, but the look the Chief gave him made it seem it was because Gilbert said it to challenge him. Matthew laced his fingers together and squeezed as he watched the show. He assumed that the Chief was just under enormous stress and that's why he was acting so strict, but Matthew still enjoyed watching someone treat Gilbert that way and it was so much more poetic when it was Gilbert's own Grandfather... right after Gilbert's brother died.
"I want you to see your brother before you take to the stage. You've been isolating yourself all week and making yourself unreachable so this will be your last opportunity to find closure." The Chief's eyes bored into Gilbert with growing intensity, as if he was speaking to a rebellious child. "I need you to understand exactly what is at stake."
"What...?" This time it was Feliciano who spoke up, seemingly unintentionally. "Ludwig's...? He's here?"
Feliciano had been highly strung all morning, barely holding his nerves together with the help of his friends. And now it looked like the reality of the funeral was about to crash down on him.
From the Chief's words, Matthew knew that Ludwig's body was on display here somewhere. Well, of course he was. It was a funeral after all. Glancing around, there was a stage far up front with a stand... a large stand that resembled a table and Matthew expected that if a casket was to be put anywhere, it was going to be there.
Matthew had to wonder if that was a part of 'the catch' that the police were trying to set up. If it was an open casket and Matthew really hoped it was... they were going to be waiting for who would go up and take a look, and how they would respond. Reactions there would be telling.
Oh, if it was open casket then the marking Matthew had left on Ludwig's forehead would be visible and if memory served correctly, the police never actually told the public about the Trail Killer's signature. So a lot of people would be confused upon seeing it... but not the killer. Very clever, but good thing Matthew was feeling sharp today and ready to tackle anything the police threw his way.
Gilbert was staring at Feliciano and the cogs were evidently turning in his brain when it became obvious that Feliciano had overwhelmingly conflicting feelings about seeing Ludwig's body but was unable to vocalize anything to the Chief of Police... and Ludwig's grandfather.
Gilbert suddenly had a look of feral determination cross his face before his eyes narrowed at his Grandfather.
"We know exactly what's at stake and you can't make Feli do something that'll just fuck him up more!" Gilbert growled as he stepped in front of Feliciano. "And I fucking hope you're not planning on showing him off to the whole fucking city! You can't just put him on display! Would he have even wanted that?"
Gilbert's voice was straining because even though it was almost healed it was still rough and he struggled to speak loud and clear.
"Gil, I can..." Feliciano trembled as he grabbed Gilbert's shirt from behind. "I can do it... for Ludwig... I want to help!"
The Chief's hardened gaze softened when he looked at Feliciano, giving Matthew the impression that not only have they met before, but likely due to Ludwig's fondness of the Italian his Grandfather had a soft spot for him too. His eldest grandson, not so much but maybe Chief Beilschmidt had the ability to sense who deserved wrath and who didn't.
"I understand if you can't see him again, but I still need you to speak today. Everything is prewritten and there's no need to keep yourself composed. In fact, it would be a lot of help if you didn't try to hold your emotions in. Your genuine grief could help further this investigation."
"I can!" Feliciano declared. "I can help!"
Maybe because Kiku could keep himself composed was the reason why the Chief didn't ask him to say any words. That's what Matthew assumed anyway as he eyed Ludwig's other close friend, who was having a staring contest with the floor and winning.
"I know you can," The Chief said then sighed sharply as his eyes landed back on Gilbert, who was getting antsy at being ignored.
"Every choice I make is for the greater good and I will not have you question me. If you must know, there will be no public viewing, however that is not something I require your approval for. If it would catch this killer, then I know Ludwig wouldn't be against it, so don't lecture me about my grandson's wishes."
Gilbert's shoulders were heaving as if he were restraining himself from some sort of outburst. Matthew didn't know if he was going to cry or 'Hulk out'.
"But you're right. It would be no good letting you see him now-"
"I want to see him!" Gilbert's voice broke. "You can't not let me see him! He's my brother-!"
"Control yourself." Chief Beilschmidt demanded as he raised his voice. "Either you see him just before the beginning of the funeral, or if you cannot compose yourself then you can see him after. I want you to make a decision based on how you'll cooperate with the proceedings."
Alfred looked torn between hightailing it out of there because it felt awkward to be watching (welcome to Matthew's life, the cursed observer) and squaring up and fighting the Chief of Police.
Matthew couldn't get an easy read on Gilbert without seeing his face. But from the way he had gone rigid, he probably was weighing up options or feeling nothing at all.
"I would have liked for you to have seen him first so your emotions were strong and you could evoke a strong reaction from the audience, but I know you can bring results even if you don't see him. I'd even encourage your habitual use of rough language incorporated into the speech where you see fit," Chief Beilschmidt continued with an icy tone. "But if you continue to be argumentative then I can't express just how disappointed I am."
Gilbert lunged forward and punched his grandfather in the arm. He didn't even say anything in particular, but he did yell. Gilbert screamed with haunting levels of frustration and grief that threatened to steal his voice from him again. Everyone made noises of shock and Feliciano started crying as he tried to pull Gilbert back.
"I am so sorry sir," Antonio ran forward to put himself between them while Alfred helped wrangle Gilbert in. "He's been grieving really badly and he definitely will do anything to help with the investigation, just give him some space to calm down."
"Yeah, I promise he can do it, but seriously, just give him a minute to cry it out instead of telling him to 'get it under control'," Alfred said but Matthew could tell he was biting his tongue so he wouldn't say more. More than biting his tongue, Alfred was clenching his fists and coiled tight like he was about to lunge.
Kiku was watching the scene and letting it play out with sagging shoulders and blank eyes that suggested he was really somewhere far away.
Matthew was watching too, but not as passively as Kiku. He was caught up wondering why Gilbert didn't go for the face. At that moment, all Gilbert had felt was rage he wanted to make his Grandfather stop. Something Matthew could understand. But why did Gilbert hold back, as if he was afraid of crossing some line even in hateful grief? He still had the urge to hit and Gilbert was a slave to his emotions... but for him to be that aware of the consequences, even subconsciously... he held back. Why? Maybe going for the face was too aggressive. Too permanent and scary? Too confrontational?
The only thing Matthew could think was that Gilbert did understand what it was like to be powerless against someone and unable to overcome the training ingrained into him after years, yet still determined to resist.
Chief Beilschmidt didn't even touch the area punched as if it didn't leave a mark or ache at all. His face was twisted with an expression warning that his patience was about to wear out.
"Pull yourself together. I don't expect to see this when you're in front of the public. I know I shouldn't expect much from you now but if you really understood the stakes you wouldn't be acting like this."
Gilbert just screamed and bared his teeth like a feral animal as he spat hate with his entire heart pouring into twisting his face into something painful. Something relateable, that was for sure. It resonated in Matthew and he knew that somewhere deep down, had he not been so reserved and suffocated, that would be him. He'd rant and rave and bark and bite. It imagined it would feel freeing to feel. Anyone could only take so much.
Antonio struggled to hold Gilbert back and Alfred tore his focus from the Chief to help his friend hold back Gilbert while Feliciano fussed over him with words that surely fell on deaf ears.
Matthew had to admit, this was really putting the fun in 'funeral'. The event hadn't even begun and this was nothing like he had expected.
Chief Beilschmidt had walked off with Gilbert and Feliciano in tow, the pair clutching at each other as Gilbert tried to wrangle his crippling shame for his earlier outburst while Feliciano tried to help. The Chief had said nothing, only lamenting the lost time they'd have to make up for. Matthew could tell it only made Gilbert feel worse because his Grandfather didn't even acknowledge it at all. It even made Matthew feel a little annoyed because didn't the Chief know he caused that?
Those left behind had awkwardly shuffled around for a few moments before finding some seats a couple of rows from the front.
"I wanna say that Grandpa-stick-up-the-ass gets a pass cus I know he's grieving and hasn't been such a dick before," Alfred began as a warning as if prefacing whatever he was going to say next. "But I'm so fucking glad Gil got a punch in. It must've felt good."
"It didn't look like it felt good," Kiku stated, his voice hardly as animated as the others.
"Yeah not for Grandpa of the year, it looked like he winced!"
"He meant for Gil," Antonio mumbled. "I know it'll only make him feel guilty and trust me when I say, guilt can eat away at you."
"Well, he fucking shouldn't feel guilty," Alfred huffed. "I've never fucking liked how his grandpa compared them all the fucking time and favoured Lud so much so Gil should feel good. Grumpy grandpa can suck it cus he pushed Gil so far so it's actually his fault he got punched."
Matthew could sense the irony here, but it didn't sting. Not when he was focused on keeping a curious eye on the family on the stage. They were out of range to be heard, but from the gestures, he could tell Chief Beilschmidt was explaining directions.
"I'm just glad the favouritism didn't ruin their relationship as brothers," Antonio said earnestly.
"But did you know what did fuck it up?" Alfred smirked as he set up for a joke, but then when he glanced at Kiku his smile skipped. "Yeah, never mind."
The joke was no doubt something to do with the very setting they were in, so it really was for the best that Alfred didn't say it or that would be very insensitive. Kiku looked like he was already so tightly wound up that Matthew was glad Alfred thought twice before giving everyone secondhand embarrassment at worst.
"Ludwig was a good brother and friend," Kiku said, his eyes lingering lazily on the stage ahead.
"Yeah, he was." Alfred agreed without resistance.
"I just hope we can be there for Gilbert," Antonio added. "Now his only family is his Grandfather..."
"A real shitty one who shat on him when Francis died too." Alfred readjusted himself on the chair impatiently. "Well, just shat on him in general, but was extra shitty when Gil's bestie died."
Matthew wished he had his oblivious tip line set up since Arthur had died and really didn't want to know how much he had missed out on because of it. He continued to watch Gilbert attempt to pull himself together on the stage while he listened into Alfred's friend's conversation.
"Yeah, I should've moved in then... after Francis. But I was caught up in my own grief." Antonio put his head in his hands. "But at least Ludwig was there for him. Ludwig was always there for him when Gil couldn't reach their Grandfather's standards."
"Yeah I would've felt like a fucking failure if that was my Grandpa," Alfred grunted.
"Ludwig would never let anyone feel like a failure," Kiku still felt distant, like he was zoned out and everyone fell into silence for a few moments.
"I hope we can see him after." Alfred's tone indicated who he was. "Might help if we get to say goodbye."
"That would be nice," Kiku said with a faint smile and Alfred draped an arm over him.
"I can tell him that I'll make sure Gil and Feli will be looked after," Antonio whispered. "Maybe it'll help him rest easier."
"We all will," Alfred murmured. "Look after them, I mean. And each other. Everything's gonna be fine."
Matthew would have his own goodbye to say. It would be nice to say it while looking down on Ludwig's corpse, but he'd have to settle for saying it in his head if he ever saw his victim's body. He hoped he would because he hadn't seen any of his victims since he left them to rot. He wanted to see how they were now, after everything. He wanted to see what he made them become.
Or maybe there was just no explanation. Just no reasoning. Matthew just wanted to see Ludwig, and he couldn't wait.
Author's note:
I don't know how to reply to comments but just know I read and love them all!