"We have got to do something about those Marauders!" Avery was shouting in the Slytherin Common Room that night.
"I second that!" Rodolphus Lestrange cried, "that mudblood lover Dumbledore won't do a thing, so it's up to us!"
"They can't get away with this!"
"Indeed," Lucius Malfoy said stiffly, "the humiliation I have suffered these past few days—!"
"Oh, come on, Malfoy, you gotta admit you looked pretty good with that beard! Bright pink polka dots all over it! You looked beautiful!" Augustus Rookwood laughed, and several others laughed too. Malfoy, however, was seething with anger.
Narcissa Black came forward, "How dare you! It was not funny—"
"You looked even better with a beard, Cissy!" Regulus Black said loudly. There was more laughter, while Narcissa Black's checks turned red.
"My own cousin…" she growled.
"I'm gonna tell the Dark Lord what happened," Crabbe muttered.
Malfoy rounded on him. "And just what will you tell Him?" he demanded, "that jam was dropped on us, and we all grew beards? Multicolored beards!"
"We'll be the laughingstock of the Death Eaters," Lestrange moaned.
"We'll be an even bigger laughingstock if we do nothing at all!" Avery retorted.
"They won't laugh if they don't know anything about it." Malfoy said, as he picked up a goblet of wine (his usual nightcap). There were some nods of agreement.
"I favor revenge," Lestrange said.
"Madame Pomfrey said Potter almost bled to death." Severus Snape muttered to himself, "Pity that curse didn't hit him sooner."
"So, we keep this from the Dark Lord, fine—not like He needs to know about it—but what do we do about the Marauders?" someone demanded.
"Duel 'em! Fight 'em for real! Beat 'em to a pulp!" Mulciber yelled, smashing his fist into his palm. "Squash 'em like bugs! Use the Cruciatus Curse on 'em, show 'em we're not to be trifled with!"
"And get expelled and arrested." Rookwood shook his head, "no, no, we should prank them back!"
"Prank every Gryffindor!" Avery cried, "just like they did to us! We'll show them!" People cheered with enthusiasm.
"How?" Regulus Black asked, "what do we do?"
Silence fell.
It was suddenly broken by Lucius Malfoy spitting out his drink and gagging. " Who put pepper in my wine?"
Everyone froze. Then pandemonium and panic broke out.
"It's the Marauders!
"They're here!"
"Where?"
"I don't know!"
"Is no place in Hogwarts safe from them?"
Crabbe screamed, "can they prank us anywhere?"
"How could they get in here?"
"They've must have been watching us!"
Narcissa Black was horrified, "They could be spying on us while we're asleep! Or bathing!"
"Ewww!"
"We're doomed!" Crabbe wailed.
"Search the Common Room!" Lucius Malfoy roared, "Find them! Leave no corner untouched! Feel around in case they are invisible! And Goyle, go stand at the door so that no one gets in or out! We'll catch them!"
Years of living with his mother had taught Regulus Black how to keep a straight face whatever the circumstances, and he was incredibly grateful for that right now. Because otherwise he would be laughing his head off.
"Few of us are going to sleep well tonight, that's for sure," He remarked to Snape.
"Indeed." Snape frowned, "How do they do it? How did they do get into our Common Room?" he asked himself quietly.
The answer, of course, was they never did. Though most did not know it, Sirius Black was not the only mischievous member of the Black family.