Chapter 17
The remainder of the week leading up to Christmas passed by in a whirlwind of activity. Between the baking and the decorating, Millie hardly had a moment to herself to rest. She didn't complain though, having found that she actually enjoyed the work and because she was kept so busy, she didn't have time for her thoughts to plague her. Her nightmares though, they were still an issue and after waking Nick one night on accident by her screaming (something which she was still very embarrassed about) she'd been trying to keep herself awake so it didn't repeat.
Her sketchbook was quickly becoming filled with her drawings, Millie spending the nights drawing to pass the time until she'd finally succumbed to sleep. Most mornings, if anyone rose early enough, they would religiously find her asleep at her desk, her head resting on her opened sketchbook. No one did though, and so, her unhealthy habit continued.
Her drawings though, that was one thing she had that she could be proud of. They were spectacular, even if she didn't consider them so. To her, drawing was a way of escape. She didn't need to think to draw, she just did and the drawings came to life of their own accord. She drew scenes she did remember from her childhood, pictures into a past that she did think of fondly. Though it had been hard growing up, they had made it work. Life had been good for a few short years and it was those years she thought of with happiness.
She'd been happy on the ranch, happy with Hosea and Ruth. They had taught her everything they knew and she owed it to them that she was the person she was today. Try as she did though, she couldn't remember her life before she had arrived at their ranch. She knew it was there, she knew she had to have memories locked away but she just couldn't recall them. She was six when she had arrived there with them, she'd been seven when she'd broken in her own pony and she'd been eight when she'd roped her first calf. She remembered those events in her life but why didn't she remember the rest?
It was on those thoughts she was contemplating late at night when it dawned on her; perhaps she could give some of her drawings to the Barkley's as presents? It wouldn't cost her anything to do so except her time and so, she'd taken it upon herself as a project to complete one drawing each for them.
Nick and Heath were easy. The drawing she had completed the week before of Nick and Heath looking at the herd was perfect for the tenacious rancher and she doubted that she could think of anything better to give him. For Heath, the landscape drawing she had done was fitting and that was another present marked off her list. She just had to come up with something for the rest of them.
An idea for Victoria's drawing had come to her when she'd been dusting in the parlor. There was a photograph on one of the tables of the family; however, Heath had been missing from the picture and she guessed that it had been taken before his integration into the family. Studying the photo carefully she had committed it to memory and religiously drew it out, with one little change. She added Heath into the drawing. It was only fitting, after all he was one of the family and they did treat him as such, that he be added in.
For Audra, she had been another easy assignment. A few months back, just after she had come to own Tomahawk, she'd come across a herd of mustangs in her travels. The sight of those wild horses running was something to behold, a vision of beauty she'd never forget as long as she lived. It was this scene that she decided was the one for the only girl in the family. Audra was just as spirited as one of those wild mustangs and so, a drawing featuring a herd of horses running against a mountain backdrop had been made.
That only left Jarrod and Eugene, the two that she had the hardest time trying to think of a subject for their drawings. After all, Jarrod was a lawyer and Eugene was studying to be a doctor. What could she possibly draw that they would like? Finally, she settled on a landscape drawing for them both, hoping that they would like what she had chosen.
As the days to Christmas passed by, her anxiety over the holiday grew. Everyone else was having such a good time, even Heath appeared to be getting into the festive spirit but all she could feel was a sinking in her stomach. All she had to give the Barkley's were her drawings. What if her drawings weren't good enough? What if they didn't like them? Her presents were only simple but she had drawn them from the heart. She had put her heart and soul into them.
With Christmas now only four days away, Millie just hoped that her drawings would be good enough.
"Are you ready to go Millie?" Audra questioned, coming into the kitchen where Millie was helping Silas clean up after breakfast. "I was hoping to leave now if we could."
"Oh um…" She added another plate to the drying rack. "I've still got these dishes to wash-"
"No, no. You go on, Miz Millie." Silas interrupted, coming over to the sink. "I finish up here. You go on now with Miz Audra."
"Are you sure Silas?"
"I'm sure. You two have fun now."
"Thank you." Wiping her hands on her apron, Millie quickly untied it and hung it back up on the hook where it belonged. "I've just got to speak to your mother first and then we can go."
"I'll be waiting out in the buggy."
She nodded and they parted ways, Millie heading upstairs first to grab her coat, hat and muffler before she went looking for Victoria. After a short search, she found Victoria in the dining room making some extra wreaths. "Ma'am, Audra and I are about to leave for town. I was hoping I might be able to grab what I've earnt before I go."
Victoria placed aside the wreath she was working on and reached into her pocket. "Of course. Here's your wages. Twenty-five cents a day and nine days of work so that is two dollars and twenty-five cents." She said as she placed the coins into Millie's hand. "You enjoy your shopping with Audra."
"I-I will. Thank you ma'am."
She frowned a little. "Something the matter Millie?"
"I just…" Millie was still looking at the coins in her hand with bewilderment. She'd never expected to be paid so much. "This-this is the most money I've ever had." She replied, looking back up at her. "Are you sure it's right? This is too much."
"Not at all my dear." Victoria replied with a kind smile, patting the girl on the shoulder. "Believe me, you've earned it."
"Well, if you're sure…" Gaining her composure, Millie slipped the money into her coat pocket. "I really appreciate it ma'am."
"You have fun shopping."
"We will."
Leaving, Millie headed out into the cold morning. Audra was seated in the buggy waiting for her and she quickly climbed in, Audra sharing the buggy blanket with her so they could keep warm. "Sorry to keep you waiting." She apologized. "But we can go now."
"It's alright Millie, you didn't keep me waiting long." With a flick of the reins the buggy horse broke into a trot and they were headed towards town. "I've got a few places I wanted to stop by, have you got any ideas where you would like to go?"
Millie shook her head. "No. I was just planning to follow you around and see if there's anything I'd like to buy for presents. I really don't have a plan."
"That's alright, we'll make it work. We have to stop by the orphanage on the way home though, I have some things I want to deliver to the children there."
A shiver running up her spine at the mention of the orphanage, she nodded and silence fell as Audra drove them to town. While the Barkely's hadn't given any indication as to what their plan with her was yet, Millie knew she couldn't be too careful. She had to keep her wits about her. They had been kind enough to her but if they were scheming anything… If they thought for an instant that she'd go willingly to an orphanage, they were in for a surprise. It wasn't going to happen. There was no way she was going to allow herself to be taken back to an orphanage. She'd come from one bad situation with Cade and her two week stay at the Carson City Orphanage had been more than enough for her. No, she wasn't going back. Either to Cade, or to any orphanage.
As she watched the landscape going by, deep inside her, she knew that this arrangement with the Barkley's couldn't last forever. Now that her hands had healed she knew they needed to figure out what they were going to do with her. While Cade was still legally her custodian, if she didn't tell anyone, they couldn't make her go back to him, could they? If they didn't find out her past, she'd be safe. The only problem however was what were they to do with her? She highly doubted they'd want to commit to her care long term, after all, she was only a no account orphan with a history she desperately wanted to leave behind her. What reason would they have to want her to stay?
Content within her own thoughts, the rest of the trip into town was made in silence. Audra had glanced over at Millie from time to time, wondering what the girl was thinking about but decided that if she wanted to share her ruminations, she would in time. It didn't escape her notice however when tears began running down her cheeks, or her wiping those tears away. Audra just wished there was something she could do or say that would help her feel better but nothing came to mind and so, she remained silent.
Arriving in town, Audra drove the buggy to the livery stable. Bringing the buggy horse to a halt she turned to Millie, placing her hand on the girl's knee. "We're here Millie."
"Oh. Oh I didn't realize." She exclaimed as she returned to reality. "Sorry."
She smiled. "It's alright. You looked deep in thought." Wrapping the reins around the brake lever, Audra climbed down from the buggy and Millie followed after her. "I'll just get the horse taken care of and we'll go shopping."
Millie nodded and Audra disappeared into the livery stable. As she waited, the girl took close notice of her surroundings. There were multiple people coming and going about their day, horses being both ridden and driven through the center of town. It seemed busier if that was even possible then it had been when Nick had brought her into town almost two weeks ago.
Audra joined her again and together they made their way through the crowds to the first store Audra wanted to shop at. Millie kept close to her, not wishing to get lost in the chaos. Being now four days to Christmas meant that a number of people were out undertaking some last minute shopping before the holiday.
As Audra did her shopping, Millie kept her eyes open for anything she thought might make a suitable present to give. The money she had earnt securely in her pocket, she kept searching. She had to make it stretch yet at the same time, wanted to find things she thought they would like.
At the fourth store they visited, Millie found herself to be finally in luck. She found some photo frames that her drawings would fit in and at twelve cents each, they weren't too expensive. Along with the photo frames she found some fancy hair barrettes and after sneaking a look to confirm Audra was too busy to notice her purchases, she added them along with the photo frames. It was exciting shopping, the first time she'd actually been able to purchase something of her own choosing.
Going onto the next store she started to relax and enjoy shopping with Audra. It was fun to browse what the stores had for sale and Millie started to forget her earlier troubles. For now, everything in her life was going as well as she could have hoped; she'd deal with her worries later. In this moment however, she was going to refuse to think about all that and enjoy the time she had with Audra.
A couple of stores later and she was in luck again. There was a selection of fancy belt buckles, the kind that she'd noticed Nick wearing from time to time. Looking around for Audra, she noticed her checking out the toy selection and after deliberating for another moment, decided she'd get her opinion. "Audra, I was wondering if you'd help me choose something."
"Sure." She added a little toy horse and wagon to her basket for the children at the orphanage. "What are you looking at?"
"These." Millie led the way back to the glass display cabinet, pointing out the belt buckles she was looking at. "I was thinking of getting two of these, one for Nick and one for Heath. What I can't decide though is which ones to pick? What do you think they'd like?"
Audra looked them over for a moment. "I think they'd like any but Nick would probably like that horse and cowboy one best. I'm not sure what I'd pick for Heath, even though he's been with us for a few months I still don't know what he likes or dislikes."
"What about the eagle?" She suggested, pointing to the buckle with an eagle in flight over a mountain range engraved in it. "I think the eagle probably fits Heath best."
"Yes, you're probably right. I think it would be a good choice."
Millie grinned. "Perfect. The horse and cowboy one for Nick and the eagle for Heath. That just leaves me to find something for Jarrod and Eugene. Got any ideas for them?"
"I'm all out of ideas for those two I'm afraid. You'll have to think of something of your own."
"Alright, I guess I can try…" She replied not too convincingly. "Who knew shopping for presents could be so difficult?"
Audra chuckled. "That's half the fun of it though, trying to figure out what the other person might like."
"Yeah, but it makes it hard when you haven't known the folks you're buyin' for all that long. I've only known you Barkley's for a month and a half, doesn't make buying a present that easy."
"I'm sure you'll think of something." She said as she placed her arm around the younger girl's shoulders. "And whatever you decide, I'm sure they'll like it."
"I hope so."
"Well, I'm almost done with this store. If you're only getting those two buckles, let's grab the clerk and pay for them and move on."
"Alright."
After getting the attention of the store clerk, the girls paid for their purchases and moved on to the next store. Millie kept looking around for something she thought would be nice for Jarrod and Eugene but nothing stood out to her. They were proving to be the hardest folks to buy something for.
Time slipped by as they shopped, Audra suggesting they stop and take some time to rest and have something to eat. Going to one of the cafe's, Audra caught up with one of her friends who worked there for her mother while they waited for some pie. Millie sat quietly, observing their conversation but not really paying much heed to it given the topic; boys. While they talked, she turned her thoughts to more serious matters. She had to find something for Jarrod and Eugene, but what?
After eating their pie, Audra said goodbye to her friend and the two girls continued on their way. Millie only had eighty-six cents left to spend, having spent eighty-nine cents on the photo frames and hair barrettes and fifty cents on the two buckles. Eighty-six cents wasn't a whole lot of money to buy something with, but it was still more money then she'd ever had to her name.
At the last store they visited, Millie finally found something she could buy. The store had a small collection of new cuff-links in and after speaking it over with Audra, she decided that they would do for Jarrod and Eugene. Another thirty-seven cents was handed over to purchase them and that was all the Christmas shopping she needed to do finished. The photo frames would go nicely with her drawings and she hoped the little things she'd been able to buy would be liked.
"Are you ready to leave town then?" Audra questioned as they walked out of the store and into the street once more. "I've finished so whenever you're ready we can go."
"I'm almost done. I just wanted to buy something for Tomahawk with what I've got left over. I was thinking I'd buy him some sugar cubes and peppermints."
"By the sounds of that, your horse has a sweet tooth."
Millie giggled. "Yeah, but it's Christmas. I don't think a little treat will spoil him."
"Alright, sugar cubes and peppermints it is then. Millar's General Store is best to get goods like that and it's on our way back to the livery anyhow." They started up the street towards the general store, Audra leading the way through the crowd while Millie kept close behind her. Soon they arrived at their destination and Millie found what she was looking for, also adding a couple apples and carrots to her purchase. "Why don't you buy something for yourself?" Audra questioned as Millie waited for the store clerk to come take her payment. "You've brought presents for everyone and this for your horse but what about you?"
She shrugged then after thinking it over for a moment, went and grabbed another sketchbook. She could afford a couple cents on some more paper. The rest of what she needed she had nowhere near enough money to buy anything else and so, whatever was left over she'd save to spend when she received more wages. "I'll grab myself a sketchbook, I've been drawing so much lately that I'm halfway through the one you gave me."
"Perhaps you could show me some of your drawings sometime?"
"Maybe." Millie replied as the store clerk finally came over to serve her. "We'll see."
The orphanage was only a short drive from town and on the way to it, Audra began to explain to Millie about how things were done there. The orphanage had been set up a few years ago after a number of children had been left orphans after an influenza epidemic and relied mostly on donations from the community to stay open. "I help out there whenever I can." Audra continued, the buggy horse maintaining a steady trot down the road. "The children always get so excited to see me."
Millie smiled a little. "I can see why, given the number of presents you've got stashed for them in the back."
"They don't have much, some of them arrive with nothing but the clothes they're wearing. We take donations for toys and things for them but most of the time, what we receive is old and worn. If giving them something new brings them joy, then to me, it's worth it."
"But what happens to them though? I mean, do they stay there until they're adults? Or do they get adopted?"
"Some of them get adopted but it's always the youngest children. Most folks who want to adopt don't want older children. We've had some children there who have stayed for two or three years. When the orphanage gets overcrowded, the ones who have stayed the longest get sent out on orphan trains in the hope they'll get adopted."
Millie swallowed the rising lump in her throat back. "But they take care of the kids here, don't they? I mean, they're well cared for, aren't they?"
"As best as we can. As far as orphanages go, this is one of the better ones. Back east, some of those orphanages treat the children little better than livestock. These children here are the lucky ones."
Lucky ones? She repeated in her mind. How can anyone consider orphans lucky? Well, compared with what Millie had witnessed first hand at Carson City, it certainly couldn't be any worse here for these children than it had been for her and by that token, then she guessed that Audra was right.
In the distance up ahead, a building appeared and Millie felt another shiver run up her spine as the orphanage came into view. Would she find herself here when the Barkley's tired of her? Would they discard her here like some child tossing aside a toy? As Audra brought the buggy to a stop outside the stone building, Millie had to take a deep breath to quell the anxiety rising within her. You're fine. You're not being dumped here…. Yet.
The door opened, children pouring out into the yard as Audra climbed down from the buggy. Millie watched as she greeted each child in turn, it was no wonder they loved her so. Anyone watching could see that Audra was in her element here, surrounded by the excited children.
After greeting each child, Audra turned back to Millie and motioned for her to come join her. "Children, this is Miss Millie." She introduced once the younger girl was standing beside her. "Let's give her a warm welcome, shall we?"
"Hello, Miss Millie."
"Hello." Millie replied with a polite smile.
"Now who wants to help me carry the packages inside?" Audra questioned, answered instantly from the children by the shooting up of hands and a chorus of "me, me, pick me!" She chuckled. "Seems I've got a lot of eager little helpers. Well, let's start unloading the buggy and we'll see what we have today once everything is inside."
The children eagerly lined up to help carry the parcels inside, Audra handing them out until they were all unloaded. Picking up the second last parcel she handed it to Millie to carry, then picking up one of her own, headed up the stairs into the orphanage.
"Miss Barkley. How nice to see you." Sister Winters greeted with a smile. "What brings you by today?"
"Christmas presents for the children. I wanted to bring them by early, in case I couldn't make it with the weather. It's so unpredictable this year. I hope you don't mind."
"No, no, not at all."
"I can't stay long, only long enough to distribute what I've brought but I'll try to come by next week and help out."
"That would be lovely. It's always a pleasure to have you visit." Ellen looked down at the young brown haired girl next to Audra. "And who's this young lady?"
"This is Millie, she's been staying with us for the last few weeks."
"Hello Millie."
Millie forced a smile in reply to the nun.
"Can we open the parcels now?" A little boy questioned, tugging on Audra's hand. "Please?"
"Of course James. Let's start opening them now. Excuse me, sister." Following the boy over to the middle of the common room, Audra sat down in the middle of the pile of parcels. "We'll start with this box here." She said, pulling a large parcel onto her lap. "Annie, would you help the children line up?" An older girl, probably about twelve years old, took charge of forming the group of excited youngsters into a semi-orderly line. "Alright, Jamie." She brought the box down lower so the boy could look inside. Inside the box was a collection of knitted scarfs, mittens and socks, all knitted by Audra and Victoria. Jamie's eyes almost fell out of his head as he looked up at her, his mouth open in awe. "What color would you like?"
"B-blue Miss. Please."
"Alright, blue it is." Pulling out a set of knitted items she handed them to him. "Now, you'll look after them, won't you?"
Jamie nodded, rubbing the soft woolen socks against his cheek. "Y-yes Miss."
"Good boy. Now go sit over there while I give the rest of these to the other children."
As Audra handed out the knitted items to the orphans, Millie sat back and observed the proceedings quietly. At a guess she had to estimate there were probably almost thirty children gathered around, dressed in clothes that were either too big or too small and appearing mended and threadbare. The children appeared to be of varying ages, ranging from the youngest which she guessed to be around four to a few others around her own age.
Watching the children's faces lighting up as they received their scarfs, mittens and socks, she knew Audra was right. These were the lucky children. Though they appeared underweight, their eyes were bright and they seemed healthy otherwise, a testament to the fact that those caring for them tried their best. They seemed happy, despite their circumstances. They didn't seem fearful or afraid.
It was a far cry from Carson City orphanage.
Sitting there, watching these children, Millie couldn't help but wonder what Christmas was going to look like for the other children she'd met in that hell hole. If she could guess, she didn't think it would be different from any other day. The tasteless mush that the Matron deemed as food three times a day was enough to make her gag even now just at the thought of it. The food (or rather, lack of it) had been the least of the children's problems. The Matron ruled the orphanage with an iron fist, any small misdemeanor was punished severely. In the two short weeks that she'd been subjected to that hell, Millie had witnessed abuse at the hand of her and other workers that made what Cade gave her seem like a walk in a park.
If only those children were as lucky to have someone good like Audra to look out for them.
No one seemed to care about those children.
It had only taken Millie a day in that orphanage to have already decided she would escape. She'd only ended up there by bad luck, having been picked up by a small town sheriff for stealing food from a saloon's bin. He'd sent her to the orphanage as soon as he picked her up, stating that he had no time for waifs like her. And so, she'd found herself on a train bound for Carson City.
Two weeks later, she'd been back on that train, leaving.
The experience made her smarter, Millie having given herself a new name and a new story to cover herself. When she ran, the orphanage could look for a Lillian Embers all they wanted, they'd never find her though she doubted they would have cared enough she was missing to try finding her. She'd gone back to the town where she'd been caught to grab her belongings and then she had disappeared again.
Returning back to the present as Audra began to hand out the toys she had brought with her, Millie vowed to herself as nice as this place seemed, she was never going to end up here. She'd rather take her chances once more living in the wilderness then to end up as one of these broken, dejected children relying on the generosity of others for their next meal.
No.
Millie Anders would never end up in an orphanage again.
~~~~~~~~
After distributing the gifts that she had brought and promising the children that she would come and visit again soon, Audra and Millie left the orphanage and returned home. "What did you think?" Audra questioned after a time, glancing over at Millie.
"An orphanage is an orphanage, Audra." She replied softly. "Those children, waiting, hoping that one day, someone will want them and take them to a better life… But you are right-" She exclaimed as she turned to her. "they are the lucky ones. They have people who do care about them and not just try to push them aside like they are a scourge on society. While it's better than some, it's still an orphanage. How can you stomach it?"
Flicking the buggy horse with the reins to get it to keep up the pace, Audra thought for a moment before replying to Millie's question. "Because I do everything I can to make those children's lives just a little bit better. Even if it is only knitting socks and buying toys, it's something." She paused, a little smile touching her lips. "And to see the joy on their faces, it makes me happy knowing that I'm doing something to bring them happiness."
Millie was silent as she thought over what Audra said. It made sense but she still didn't know how she could do it.
Audra glanced back over at Millie as the horse trotted on towards home. "You're worried we're going to send you there, aren't you?"
Millie nodded.
"Millie, we wouldn't do that to you."
"It's not your decision Audra." She replied softly. "It's up to your mother and brothers to decide."
After a late lunch, Audra and Millie sat down in the living room to wrap up their presents while the house was empty. Audra tried to cheer Millie up as they worked, telling her stories of Christmas's past and after sometime, it worked. When their presents were wrapped, they were about to go to the kitchen to help Victoria with some baking when a knock sounded on the door.
"I wonder who that is." Audra wondered, handing the presents she'd been carrying over to Millie. "Would you mind taking these up to my room while I see who's at the door?"
"Sure."
Millie headed upstairs with the presents and Audra went to the door. "Hello Timmy." She greeted with surprise, seeing the little snow covered boy standing there. "Come in, you're liable to freeze out there in this weather."
"T-thank you, Miss Audra."
Closing the door behind him, Audra turned back to the child. "What brings you here Timmy? Your folks are alright, aren't they?"
"M-my folks are fine Miss. I-I came to talk t-to you."
"Talk to me? Well, why don't we grab some hot coco first and then you can tell me all about why you're here. How's that sound?"
"F-fine, M-miss Audra."
"Well, come this way and you warm yourself by the fireplace." Audra led the way into the living room, guiding the boy to the chair closest to the fire. "And I'll just get that coco ready."
Timmy shivered as he sat beside the fireplace, holding his hands to the fire as close as he dared. As his fingers thawed out, he reached inside his coat and drew out a squirming gray kitten. "Let's hope they like you." He told the kitten as it meowed softly, wanting to be put down. "This here's your last chance."
Placed onto the floor, the kitten began to toddle around on its tiny legs to explore the huge room, Tommy keeping a close eye on it. Hearing footsteps approaching he quickly snatched the kitten back up and placed it back inside his coat for safe keeping.
"Here we go." Audra carried in a tray with a steaming cup of coco and some cookies that she placed down onto the coffee table. "Timmy, this is Millie." She introduced as Millie took a seat with her. "She's been staying with us for a few weeks."
"Hi." Timmy replied with a grin.
"Hello." Millie smiled back.
"Well, Timmy," Audra started after the boy had drunk a few sips of coco. "what's so important you had to come see me in this weather?"
"Just this, Miss."
"Oh Audra, a kitten!" Millie exclaimed with a gasp as the boy produced the tiny feline from his coat. "Oh, can I hold it? Please?"
"Sure." Timmy handed it over to her, picking up a cookie in his free hand.
Holding the tiny kitten in her hands, Millie's heart melted. The kitten was such a tiny little thing, no more than five weeks old at her guess and with the biggest eyes she'd ever seen. "Oh you poor little thing. You're so tiny." Despite the kitten's tiny statue, as she scratched beneath her chin, the kitten began to purr loudly. "Audra, just look at her. She's so tiny and perfect. Look at her eyes! They're huge. Oh you are such a sweet little thing, aren't you?"
Audra turned back to Timmy. "Alright Timmy, how about you tell me why you've brought me a kitten?"
"Gotta find a home for it, Miss. Scratch had kittens and Pa wants them gone. I've been walkin' around all mornin' tryin' ta find a home for this one but no one wants her. She's the runt Pa says. No one wants runts. Been able to find homes for the others, but not this one." Timmy shrugged. "You're always takin' in stray pups and cats, thought maybe you'd want it."
"Oh I do, but I don't think I can Timmy. I've already got too many cats." She paused for a moment. "Tell you what, I'll go get Mother and we'll see if we can figure something out, alright?"
He nodded and Audra left again. Swallowing down another cookie, he looked over at Millie. "What 'bout your folks? Would they let ya keep her?"
Millie shook her head. "My folks are the Barkley's for the moment. I'm afraid what they say goes." She paused for a moment, the kitten curling up against her chest. "What will happen if you can't find her a home?"
"I just gotta find her a home. If I take her home again, Pa said he's gonna drown her. He says we've got too many mouths to feed as it is."
Her heart skipped a beat. How could anyone think of drowning such a cute, innocent little kitten? Her eyes started to water and she quickly swallowed back the lump in her throat. If only she could keep her.
Audra returned at that moment with Victoria in tow. "Here it is, mother. Timmy says that he's got to find her a home."
Looking at the kitten that Millie was holding, Victoria sighed and turned back to her daughter. "Audra, I know you want to help but you've already got nine cats. We can't take on another one. I'm sorry."
"But you just gotta." Timmy begged as he stood, cookie crumbs falling from his lap to the floor. "Pa's only given me till tonight to find her a home. I've been walkin' all over an' no one wants her. You're her last chance. If I take her home, Pa's gonna drown her."
"I'm sorry Timmy, I am but we can't help. Why don't you go visit the Morgans? Or the Davies? They might want a cat."
He shook his head. "I already done tried 'em. They couldn't take her either."
"Well, I'm sorry Timmy, but we just can't take her."
"It's alright. I'll keep tryin'." He turned to Millie, holding his hand out for the kitten. "Maybe I'll find someone in town."
Not wanting to give the kitten back, Millie held onto it.
"Millie." Victoria said softly. "Give him the kitten."
Pressing a kiss to its tiny head, Millie handed the kitten back to Timmy and fled outside before anyone could see the tears falling down her face.
"Thanks for the cocoa and cookies, Miss Audra." Timmy said as he stuffed the kitten back inside his coat. "I best be keepin' on."
"I'm sorry Timmy." Audra walked him to the door. "I wish I could help but I have to obey Mother."
"It's alright. You tried." He looked back over at Victoria. "Bye ma'am."
"Goodbye Timmy."
The child left and Audra closed the door behind him, the two women returning to the kitchen to get back to their Christmas baking. "I hope he finds the kitten a home." Audra said after a time. "Be a shame if it has to be killed."
"You and I both know Audra, it has to happen sometimes. The Holland's have got seven children to feed, they hardly have food for themselves let alone to feed another cat."
"Just because it has to happen sometimes doesn't have to mean I like it." She replied sadly, dumping another cup of flour into the bowl. "And Millie really seemed to like that kitten."
"We do have other cats."
"But not like that one."
Victoria sighed heavily, feeling like she was the villain for saying no. "I'm sorry, but we just can't take in another cat. We've got too many barn cats as it is."
"I understand Mother."
Silence fell in the kitchen, only interrupted a short time later by the approaching sound of fast footsteps mixed with the jingle of spurs.
"I just found Millie out cryin' in the barn." Nick exclaimed as he entered the room, his hands on his hips. "Couldn't get a word of sense outta the kid. Anyone care to tell me what's gotten her so upset?"
Victoria sighed. "Timmy Holland came by just now with a kitten he's been trying to find a home for. He wanted to know if we'd take it but I refused. We've just got too many cats as it is. I'm afraid though his father told him if he returns home with it, he's going to drown it."
It all made sense to Nick now. He'd come in from checking the stock and was in the process of putting Coco away when he'd found Millie bawling her eyes out into Tomahawk's mane. When he'd tried to speak to her, the girl had completely ignored him and waved him off. "And that's why Millie's upset."
She nodded.
"Millie seemed to really like it too." Audra added. "First time I've seen her get really excited about something."
"Yeah, well, now she's out there thinkin' the world's endin'." Nick sighed as he folded his arms across his chest, looking at his mother. "Do you really think havin' one more cat around the place is gonna make that much difference? Besides, it might be good for Millie to have somethin' little to fuss over."
"And what if she has to leave? Then what would happen to it?"
"Well, we'd cross that bridge when and if we came to it I expect." He replied. "Think of the good it could do for her."
"I've never seen her so happy." Audra interjected, trying to help convince their mother to reconsider her decision. "She took to that kitten instantly like they were made for each other. It'd be good for her, I just know it would. Please?"
"What do you say, Mother?"
Victoria looked at her two children and sighed heavily, shaking her head as she finally relented. "Alright. Alright. I can see when I'm outnumbered. Yes, Millie can have the kitten. Go tell Timmy we'll take her."
Audra squealed with excitement. "Thank you Mother. I knew you'd see reason."
"Underneath that crusty exterior lies the heart of an angel." Nick added, giving their mother a kiss on the forehead. "I knew you'd see reason."
Victoria chuckled. "Get going Nick before I change my mind."
"Yes. Going." He helped himself to some icing on the way out the door. "Going."
"Oh, Millie is going to be so happy." Audra said after Nick had left. "I think she's been having a bit of a rough time lately."
"What makes you say that?" Victoria questioned, curious as to what Audra had observed.
"I don't know, she just doesn't seem like herself and when I took her with me to deliver the presents to the kids at the orphanage, she… I don't know. It was almost like she was afraid and then on the way home, I asked her if she thought we were going to send her there and she thinks we are." Audra hesitated for a moment. "We're not, are we? I mean, Jarrod's gotten temporary custody of her now, right?"
Victoria nodded. "And he's going to try for permanent custody once time is up."
"Maybe he needs to tell Millie that sooner rather than later."
Riding Coco, it didn't take long for Nick to catch up with Timmy. As he saw the boy on the road ahead he slowed his gelding down, bringing him to a halt near where the boy had stopped to let him past. "Afternoon Timmy."
"Hi Mister Barkley."
"I hear you're tryin' to find a kitten a home."
Timmy's face lit up a little and he nodded, looking up at Nick. "Do you know someone who wants one?"
"You bet I do. I'm here to take it off your hands. We've got room for one more cat on the Barkley spread."
"But your Mother said-"
"We were able to get Mother to reconsider."
"Geez," Timmy exclaimed with amazement. "I wish I could change my Mama's mind that easily."
Nick laughed heartily. "Comes with age, my boy. It's a long walk back home for you, would you like a ride?"
"Really Mister Barkely?"
"Really."
"You bet!"
"Up you come now." Grabbing hold of Timmy's arm Nick helped him up onto Coco behind him. "Now hold on tight, you hear."
"Yes sir."
Tapping Coco with his spurs, the gelding jumped into a canter and they continued on down the road to the Holland's ranch. When they came to the crossroads, Nick slowed Coco to a halt once more. "I'll have to let you off here boy, I'm needin' to get back to the ranch. Sorry I can't take you all the way."
"That's okay, thanks for the ride." He accepted Nick's help in getting down off the horse then reached into his jacket and pulled out the sleeping kitten. "Take good care of her, won't ya?"
"Of course." Nick promised, taking the tiny kitten in his gloved hand. "Has she got a name?"
"Becky named her Miracle, said it was a miracle her survivin' seein' that she's the littlest one."
"Miracle hey?" He repeated, the kitten opening her eyes to stare up at him. He ran a gloved finger beneath her chin and the kitten began purring loudly. "Seems fitting."
"Thanks for takin' her, I didn't want Pa havin' to put her down."
"I'm sure Millie's gonna be mighty glad for the same reason." Gently he placed the kitten into his jacket pocket and fastened the buttons up so she couldn't escape. Picking up Coco's reins he turned the gelding towards home. "Have a good Christmas, Timmy."
"You too. Thanks again for the ride."
Soon Nick arrived back at the ranch and was greeted with another problem; what was he going to do with the kitten till Christmas? Seeing Duke walking outside the barn, he began to smile a little. His foreman would love being on kitten-sitting duty for the next couple of days. "McColl," He called out as he halted Coco in front of the barn. "you got a moment?"