CHAPTER 21

Date: December 22nd, 110 P.A. / 2114 C.E.

Mewtwo gazed down at his Priestess, saying nothing as Doctor Zered attempted to staunch the bleeding, to coax fluid into her. It had been three days since the attack, and the investigation had turned up nothing save speculation of traitors within the Temple. But Mewtwo had known this already. His amethyst eyes were empty as he watched her shallow breathing, his face a blank slate. Yet inside, worry ate away at the edges of his heart and mind. She needed treatment that Zered's limited technology wouldn't give her…that had been lost before the old world ended.

He thought of her words before she fell into a coma, a sleep she might never awake from. Indeed, the doctor had reported her vitals were declining…: "A—Abaddon I…I can't see! Where are you? Abaddon!"

She'd sounded so frightened…he had not heard her sound like that since she had first awakened. Anger, sorrow, glee, yes…but fear? No…only in the Room of Solemnity had she displayed such terror, but it had been fleeting…and it did not compare to the fear that she had displayed when she realized she'd been blinded.

Mewtwo understood that she had been damaged in the brain. The ceramic pot that had been shattered over her head had struck a soft spot, a nerve…and while it could be fixed, the Royal Physician had none of the advanced resources to do it. So, seeing there was little hope for conventional methods, Mewtwo sent him away…he would take charge of the healing. He was the only hope for the girl now that she was fading so fast….

He took her to the chamber below the Temple, hooking her up to some of the medical machines. These checked her vitals and injuries, confirming what Abaddon had suspected. Then, he closed his eyes, placing his hands to her head…willing his regenerative powers into healing a creature who was not of his flesh and blood, but growing more and more integral to his heart….

"Come back to me, Arei…."

And indeed, she would…but not before the consequences of his healing were fully made clear to the both of them, and a few battles won. For in healing her mind, inevitably, her neural blocks had to be prodded, perhaps even lifted. Mewtwo knew the inevitably, and he healed her mind of the shredding he himself had dealt to it, she would remember shards of her life…and what was more dangerous? Fragments, or the whole story of a life that might just be better left forgotten…?

No matter…he could not pick and choose. He had manipulated her mind already…he did not wish to do so again and risk the mind that he was trying to save. His resolve to face whatever arose from his Priestess in the end, and began to heal her from the damage that had been done to her….

For what seemed like weeks, Arei thought herself to be drifting in an ocean of black ink, without light, without color, without her senses or a shred of reality. Occasionally, she felt Abaddon's hands, felt the exhaustion of her body lift to awareness…before burying her beneath heavy layers of unconsciousness, lost to the world. Her head ached and throbbed, feeling as though it wished to crack in two inwards from the place she had been struck. When she was able to gather enough of her wispy, smoke-like thoughts, she recalled talking to Messenger Craven…walking away…then turned to face him again and spying movement in her peripheral vision…before agony exploded from her skull and darkness. And that blackness had yet to lift. Only barely did she remember to call Mewtwo by the name Abaddon. The habit had been declining in private. He didn't seem to mind one way or the other. Yet, he responded far more readily to his true name…so when they were alone, they used it….

Suddenly, there was a glow, so alien that at first, she stared…before floating over to it, watching as it focused into color, sound and scent coming afterwards. She gazed upon a man with violet hair, a beard and mustache growing on his face in a fine stubble, his skin weathered and tan. He had dark eyes like olivine, and was holding onto someone…HER, she realized. She was seeing through someone else's eyes…so essentially, it was her point of view, though she wasn't sure whose memory this was. But she quieted her thoughts, listening. He was reading her a story:

"And the great God of Souls purged the world of the sinful, washing away their Babylons and liberating the Holy Children. His family of the Legendary Beasts gazed in approval and did not quell his storms, and after ten years of the cleansing, the Goddess of Life and Light, the Mother of all things of blood and spirit, ended the suffering to allow the innocent to be brought forth. And Great Abaddon bound to her will, and helped to guide the chosen people into a new way of life, in harmony with the world."

A woman entered the cozy room, caring a tray of gauze. "My dear, what are you reading to our little girl?"

He held up the book, his finger between the pages as a bookmark. "The Holy Book of Rebirth."

"Isn't she a little young for that?"

There came a high, indignant squeak, and laughter in response. "Not at all. You can never be too young to get a proper religious education in this world."

The mother's orchid eyes, the color of red blended with violet, flashed with a mixture of amusement and warning. "And what about tolerance, Drako, dear?"

He smiled widely. "No need to worry, Sarah! I'll read her some of our book in a bit. After all, she needs to know what our patients are talking about or she'll risk offending them with her ignorance."

He stared at Arei. "And we wouldn't want that, eh, little Serenity?"

The image faded. "Serenity"…? It had been the name Kaien had used for her. Was that her real name then? Serenity?

"Yes, it was."

Arei spun around and seized up. There before her, mimicking her every movement, each glance and twitch…was herself. She approached the figure…it approached her. She reached out…so did it, like a mirror image. But when their fingers touched, it was not a smooth pane of glass she felt…but icy fingers. Not clammy, but icy all the same. She pulled her arm away fleetly…she did the other. It seemed to Arei though that there were some differences…the other Arei seemed to be cast in a darker like, and her eyes…they were different somehow. Mewtwo's Arei possessed wide, kinder, more innocent eyes…but the other's eyes were more narrowed, stony, and seemed to know far too much anger and pain in general. This was not her. Yet it was her.

"Confusing, isn't it?" the other Arei said, seemingly kindly enough…but the tone was faintly sad and mocking.

She was reading her thoughts…no. That wasn't right. She merely knew them as if they were her own. Reflection…. "Who are you?" Arei asked, wanting a straight answer. She already felt she half knew.

The other Arei smiled. "I am you. I am what used to be you. I am what you might once again be."

Arei shook her head, then asked more specifically, "But what is your name?" There. Let her see how she answered that.

The cruel grin widened. "I am Serenity. I am you. I am what used to be you. I am what—"

"I got that part! But I don't understand—"

"Of course, you don't. Your precious 'Mewtwo' addled you and destroyed me in the process. Or rather, he killed me, and birthed you from the corpse of my soul. He erased me and made you."

"You aren't making any sense!"

"I am. Perfectly. You just don't comprehend the meaning behind my words. Tell me, do you want me to show you?"

The offer was left before her like a succulent dish to a starving person. Arei hesitated with the thought of poison, but then leapt upon the opportunity to know herself, once and for all. Only later would she muse that her haste was manipulated on the part of Serenity, who knew she only had so much time before Mewtwo held the girl, and this unconscious connecting between the awake and dreaming mind was severed. She drew her twin along, explaining as she went.

"That memory was our home in Nocturne, with our mother and father. There were local doctors, and treated anyone who came within their doors, whether resident or rebel. It mattered not to them—they just wanted to help people. As a result, they became very wide-minded, this trait only encouraged by the fact that they were from the Northern Lands, who encourage free-thinking and creativity. Our family moved to God Abaddon's realm to aid a sick friend…but stayed because they saw they could be of use to the people here. And they accepted the teachings of the Pantheon as their main religion…they saw Abaddon as a widely misunderstood creature, and wanted to be beneficial towards his followers."

She glared at Arei. "Remember that when you see what their fate was."

Another foggy window…with Serenity's coaxing, it cleared. It was night. The fire hearth in the living room was burning low, and a desperate knocking came from the door. Serenity, seven years old, was sleeping on the couch, that Arei could tell from this perspective. The image was fuzzy with grogginess, but she heard the hurriedly whispered words well:

"Drako, you have to get Sarah and Serenity out of here! The authorities have learned that you were sheltering rebels, and the holy guard will be coming to confront you at any minute now! Don't make me remind you what happened to Philip Baker—"

But Drako was already gathering Serenity up in his arms and calling for his wife. They managed to evacuate the shelter before the city guard came. However, there was not enough time to gather their supplies and get away themselves. Drako had told Sarah to go, but she refused, and Serenity would not go with strangers, even if ordered to. So, Serenity was fleetly hiding in the passageways under the house and floorboards. She gazed up into the room as her parents faced the guard.

A verdict was read out, and her parents argued—and were slain. Swords slashed through them, and they collapsed. Her father died instantly, and her mother pleaded for Serenity to run and get away in a low voice that escaped the guard's hearing. But Arei could not move. Her parents' blood dripped through the floorboards onto her, and it was only through pure traumatizing shock that she didn't scream and give away her position.

She got a long look at all of their faces. One of the sergeants, the one who had stabbed into her father's belly, would become the next commander of the army. He was crying silently. His fellows and superiors did not notice. And she knew she hated him above them all. For murdered were not supposed to weep. They were supposed to be evil through and through, so when the time for vengeance came, one could comfort themselves by saying their victim had been a monster and deserved to die for their heartlessness and cruelty.

They set the house afire. And already, Serenity's insides howled with grief and anger and an aversion to all things that bore Abaddon's sign. For it was wrong. Her God was wrong! WRONG!

And the house burned above her, and she retreated into one of the tunnels that led to the outskirts of the city to smuggle goods and rebels through their healing. Afterwards, after dawn had arrived, she would return to find her life all ashes…and she emerged from that ash, and screamed to the sky, asking where god was and declaring him a lie in his silence.

Eventually, Arei would begin to understand fully what had happened. Her parents had been made an example of—because as good people who dared to help the heretics, they were valued more by all who knew of them. And so, the loss of them struck deeply…and at was firmly believed by all that their innocent girl, growing up on the teachings of Abaddon, had been killed in the process. It was a reminder to all that no matter how faithful, helping the faithless would not be tolerated. It was a taint to the soul…and others best remember that. For all rebel nests would be cleared out eventually…and any caught in them, no matter what religion, would be destroyed with the impure ones.

Arei shuddered, and if she could have, she would have thrown up. Serenity gave her a merciless look. "And that's the male you serve—he orders the deaths of innocent people who get in the way of those who defy him. And to think, you care about him!"

"…Shut up! There are many more people who could have ordered the assault!"

"But he began the Cleansings. Whether directly or not—he is to blame for the hell of our life," the other said coldly, and then began to draw her onwards. She had more to show the Priestess.

But first, another explanation, "Now, after our parents were murdered and our home destroyed, we wandered on the streets for a few years. We joined gangs to survive, we learned how life and people worked. Eventually, we began to notice who had the advantages in lower places, and who had the harder existences in more secure positions. Repeatedly, we were told that we were too cute to be a rat on the streets. We took that as advice, and decided there was only one place to go to have the best chance of reaching the age to become a useful Rebel.

"After all, even though we were young, we were very intelligent and purposeful—we knew what we wanted. We wanted to strike back at that god…to make him pay for the crimes he'd committed against us and others. We learned much when the rebels came in annually for capitol news updates…we learned the truth, and kept it to ourselves. We, even at that young age, were formulating shrew plans to get where we wanted and ensure we got the chance to dealt a damaging blow to Abaddon's campaign. So, we went to a place that was reputed to have great health care, shelter for years on end without pay, and with the skills taught there, able to get close and personal with official personnel. Information would be easy to obtain once the acting was down, and if one got famous enough, could get into high places through less than public manners. There were shortcuts to the ladder of hierarchy…and we found the most prominent one. And as long as we got a good education, privately, it could work immensely to our benefit."

She smirked complacently. "In short, we enrolled in a brothel."

Arei jerked to a halt. "Brothel." She knew that word. It meant "whorehouse." The home and workplace of prostitutes. Women (or men) who gave up their bodies to customers seeking carnal pleasure and stress relief. Women who were more than willing to dapple in dirty and humiliating, sometimes even dangerous activities to get paid. Rape and disease were common. Pregnancy happened. A brothel. She had gone to a brothel…to live there and work?

She shook her head. "No…no, that can't be right! I—"

"Did you bleed when you fucked him?"

Arei felt her breath leave her at that declaration, at that cruel grin. She thought back on it…and trembled. "Well, no, but…."

Serenity laughed at her. "You are no virgin. You haven't been since you were sixteen. I'll show you proof!"

She was looking through another window. She was ten years old. A little scrawny, a little rough around the edges, but smart and streetwise. She knew curses grown soldiers would find foul, and she knew that the place before her was her only hope if she was ever to become someone useful. Orphans have few options, and this was the lesser of all the evil choices present before her. And this was a back path to her goals. She stepped inside the brothel, ignoring the moans and shrieks and shouts from the locked private room in the back of the place, going to the front desk.

A middle-aged woman named Teresa gazed down at the child warily. "What do you want, little one? You shouldn't be here, you know."

But the girl saw her reflection in the woman's glasses, her posture straight and defiant, and said, "I'd like to sign with you and start my training. I can take care of my expenses and—"

The woman put up a hand, cutting her off…but did not order her away, instead saying, "Come with me before you bind yourself with words. Becoming one of my girls isn't easy as you might think, and there are consequences you probably haven't taken into account yet. Let me show you some things before you go and jump into a man's bed."

She showed her the infirmary, at the sick women there, whose patrons had been unclean. When Serenity crossed her arms, looking out in silence, and Madam Teresa drew her to another ward. The women found there were only a few years older than her, their bellies round with unplanned for and possibly unwanted children, many of which might become street rats like Serenity herself, if their mothers didn't want them. The sight of it affected the child slightly more, but her resolve was set, and she told the Head Mother as much. The woman sighed, knowing it would be of no use to argue. She would not be turning this girl aside. She took out a contract and Serenity signed it. It was done.

Arei wanted to vomit, and her other self just touched her shoulder. "Nice, eh? From a doctor's child to a whore-in-training. After a few years of good food, you were pretty enough to get a high bid, when the time came. We paid out most of our debt with that. Want to see?"

Another window, another memory. They watched as a dark-haired, pale-skinned man approached, smiled, and reassured her that there was no need to be frightened. Serenity said she was not, said a few enticing things…he laughed. Beginning to undressed himself and then her….

"We were lucky. He tried to make it as painless as possible, but of course, some hurt was inevitable."

He left early in the morning…Serenity winced, then got up out of bed. She gathered her stained sheets, throwing them into the laundry, and went to the bath. She scrubbed herself clean, but she refused to cry. She'd picked this life for herself and someday, she would find a way to get back at the God…she would!

The image faded…more years passed. Serenity would become a fellow sister in the family that Madam Teresa and her girls made…she would have friends who went by the name of Ty and Sharie. She would have her regular customers, the good and the bad, her times of joy and suffering, of illness and health. She would learn how to create pottery, the abrasive clay leaving her hands soft and able to gauge just how to touch and how much pressure to add. She would become a beautiful young woman, gaining knowledge beyond her years from governmental officials and outcasts alike. But of all those who walked into her room for a night, one young man, nervous and yet a virgin, would become almost as important to her as her ambitions, and even more precious to what remained of a girl's heart.

Kaien….

"Funny that you remember him and not your hate for your precious Abaddon. But perhaps you are more inclined to love than not."

Of all the memories, Arei watched this one hungrily…the young man, soon to be recruited into the rebel's fold, had been suggested to 'become a man' before her potentially gave his life…and Serenity was the girl he chose. She'd caught his eye with her quiet, distant manner in a way the other, older flirtatious girls had not. She was beautiful in his eyes, and Serenity watched with some amusement as he gulped when finding her sitting in her bed, waiting for him. He was nervous. She went to him, taking his arm, her hand on his, and gentle drew him to the edge of the bed.

Kaien spoke first. "What's your name?"

Serenity was surprised…customers usually made a point not to be so formal and learn the names of the girls unless they had a favorite. She answered him, but did not ask for his name. What need was there to unless they preferred for her to murmur their names back to them and they came into her?

He flushed at the low, smooth tone of her voice, and said, "That's pretty. Serenity. My name is Kaien…and uh…I've never done this before, so um…I'm not certain what to do."

He blabbered this…and she laughed, amused, not at him but at his sweet cuteness. "Don't worry. It'll come to you easily enough. I'll guide…it's not as if you're the first virgin to come to me." She smiled slightly. "At least you aren't pretending to be more than you are…those who pretend to know what they're doing are the worst."

"How many have you…?"

"I don't know. They all blur together after a time. But after four years, and most of them different people almost each night a week…it's quite a bit."

He chuckled. "Oh great. I pick the one who will know just how incompetent I am."

"You don't have to be skilled or vigorous to impress me. That takes a different approach."

He looked at her curiously. "And what's that?"

Serenity smiled. "That's my personal business. Maybe I'll tell you later. Now, Kaien, are we going to spend the night talking, or do you want to get your money's worth?"

Shew drew him into bed…they took off one another's clothes, and to Serenity's subtle surprise, he held her, kissed her…his touches rather gentle, if timid, before he gained some confidence after seeing that Serenity did not balk or scowl at him. She went through one of the series of movements and touches that she had designed, having picked something slow, tender for the young man…she could tell her appreciated that, and she was glad of this. He was a sweet young man. She could even grow fond of him….

"Will this hurt you?"

Bad timing, though. He asked her that in the middle of the foreplay she so rarely got to indulge in. But the question amused her. She shook her head "no," assuring him she would feel no pain. She leaned into him, intending to clasp him to her, but he, to her amusement, stopped her. He actually seemed…bothered by something.

"Will you even feel anything for yourself?"

She blinked in surprise. No one had ever asked her that before. But then, she'd only come across a handful of sentimental men in her time here. As a result of this being an occupation, usually one of aching if her customers rushed too fast, she'd learned to detach her mind and body, ending whatever her body felt. It was not personal. What she felt meant nothing to her or her soul. And here was a question addressing that very fact. His acute perception surprised her…she did not know how to respond. He saw this all on her now unguarded face, and touched her cheek gently.

"So, you won't…but could I ask you to enjoy yourself, for me? Sure, it'll be awkward, but…I want you to feel me, if that makes any sense."

It did…and Serenity shivered. It took her a moment to decide whether or not to take such an offer…and take it she did. Her training seemed to melt away, as did her cool exterior. She knew sex very well…but in all of her experience, in all those she had joined with in body, she had never allowed herself to make love with any of them. For Kaien, she trembled and did this…savoring each tender kiss and touch. Her senses sharpened at the feel of him…and when he came inside, she held him tight, whimpering into his ears. It…felt blissful…sweet. A little awkward…but…memorable and nice all the same. For the first time since she couldn't help her bodies inured responses, she found her own piece of heaven with him…and then fell asleep in his arms, not minding the way he kissed her hair afterwards.

Yes…she could indeed grow fond of Kaien….

Over the next year, whenever he was in the capitol, he came to her…and as she learned from his friends and her sisters, he came only to her. She was touched by this, and found himself beginning to long for the times he visited, the affection she felt for him deepening as time passed, and he to her. Sometimes they didn't even make love when they came. They merely touched and spoke of various matters…the rebels, the goals they had in life. They shared their life stories, and Kaien told her that he thought he could get a place for her on his team. She savored the idea. She met with some of the Rebel leaders…who said she looked promising, to both of their pleasure. She began to make plans to become a freelance worker, to break her contract to join Kaien's force. Madam Teresa, friendly with the Rebels, thought this a fine idea. And on a personal note, Kaien and Serenity…thought about a life they might share after they had achieved their desires. After the war. To be married…to adopt some children…it sounded…so sweet…. Serenity knew she loved him then….

"Adopt?" Arei questioned, taken aback.

For the first time, Serenity not only seemed soft and warm at the memory, but…sad. "Yes. Soon, you'll understand…but now for the final thing I wish to show you."

It was night. Songs of mourning hung in the air; the smell of ritual incense strong in the air. The brothel was closed for the week due to recent circumstances concerning the order. The High Priestess Kara had been poisoned by one of her Handmaidens. Despite that business was closed, her true lover was here. Neither cried at the loss of the woman, but the distress of their companions was enough to sadden them. They gave comfort to each other, and then heard voices and the sound of the entrance being broken into. Madam Teresa yelled at the holy guards, and Serenity trembled, wondering if this was some sort of sick repetition of her childhood nightmare. Was she to lose her family, her loved ones again, and her home?

But the shock came when an official voice called out. "The God Abaddon had chosen a woman of this residence to be his new High Priestess. He goes to fetch her now and help her to Ascend to her new life."

For a moment, Serenity panicked. Was it Ty? Sharie? If it was, then that might mean she would have to strike at her friends sometime in the future. She comforted herself in that moment with the thought that they would no longer be her friends if Abaddon took them.

Then, to her horror, it was her door that was blown upon, and the "God of Souls" stepped in. His face was a blank mask, and he glared at the Rebel boy, throwing Kaien and holding him to a wall with his powers as her lover pulled a gun from his robes. Serenity took out her dagger and charged, screaming at him:

"I won't go with you! I'd rather die than be a Priestess!" For she knew what her fate would be if she was taken by the beast before her. She got so close to stabbing him at that moment, but was stopped as his powers forced the blade from her grasp. Then, she could not move…the soldiers bound her and Abaddon held her in place. Afterwards, she struggled, spitting and screaming. She did not want the devil's "honor." She did not want to be an empress! NO!

His paw touched under her chin, lifting her eyes to meet his…he smirked. "You have a strong will…and that appeals to me. Fight all you wish…but you will be my priestess soon enough. That is your fate, woman."

She cursed his name, and his eyes glowed, the flash driving blades through her eyes and into her brain, tearing her soul apart…Serenity fell into blackness…a black fog now unable to be lifted again. The other had exhausted herself. And time had run out…only a few more moments left to make Arei see…!

"You had so much before he destroyed it all! How can you care for him or forgive him, knowing what you do now?"

Arei slowly came to herself and shivered. "That is the life I used to live. It's not me anymore."

Serenity seethed. "It's who you are, no matter how you deny it! You can't fight that truth. I am you. You are me. Accept it, and you can be whole again."

But Arei remembered Abaddon's touch. "…I can be whole without you. I have him."

"You think you love him, is that it?" Serenity knew love. She knew Kaien.

Arei shook her head. "I didn't say that. But my new life can complete me just as well as the old."

"No! Take me back! If you don't, I will die here!"

Arei gazed at her other persona and considered. "Perhaps that would be best. You no longer have a place, Serenity."

Serenity refused to accept this, and launched herself at Arei in one final desperate act of the memories and consciousness trying to join. For one could not be complete without the other. Arei fought the avatar of her past, but as soon as they touched, as soon as Serenity held and kissed her, Arei could not deny the memories, as they were as bittersweet and addictive as a forbidden drug. Two pieces of the soul came together, opposite that melded together with perfection, not cancelling each other out. For Serenity was Arei. Arei was Serenity. And Arei's mind flooded with the memories of her past, who she was, the darkness filled with life and color and senses and light. They all tumbled back, and like the chaos that had driven them into the dark, the havoc their return made Arei almost fall into insanity. But there was a thread that led to consciousness and awakening, that led to reality from dreams.

She followed this thread, terrified of tugging too hard and snapping it, as all the while, her mind and sound began to shift and she and herself mixed into one complete whole. Arei felt the changes, but clung to the thread. The thread that was her Abaddon, and while she clutched it, the small part of Arei that cared for Abaddon was preserved. It reminded the same, even as everything else changed. And of all the things that Arei herself longed to keep the same, it was that affection and empathy. And so, the completion of Arei's soul truly was just that: Both pieces of her were preserved. She remembered her past, the life and feelings of it…and she remained the person she had been growing into.

When the transformation was complete, she had altered…and yet, in the most important ways, she remained the same. When she awoke, she did not open her eyes…reaching up, feeling Mewtwo's face. Each curve and wrinkle…he nuzzled her hands with a relieved sigh. She opened her eyes…. He seemed so different…but he was the same. A question mark. Her question mark. From the gaze she gave him, Mewtwo knew that things were different now…she knew, but…she was still his empress. Still his companion. That had no changed.

She reached up…touching his lips…and cursed quietly, drawing him down, kissing him. Without a thought, he teleported his healed Priestess to his quarters…and somehow…somehow…something new, something unexpected but sweet was forged between them.

The closest anyone could consider it was the term "friends with benefits." It was strange, but both accepted it willingly. Perhaps it had been inevitable since Mewtwo had chosen her. For even as he had, he knew she was different. That he was asking for potentially destructive change. But…that was what he had wanted. A fire in his life…. Willful, unpredictable, and capable of the sweetest of human gifts—empathy.

He had wanted to be close to someone like her.

That she had turned out to be like Ai had been a miraculous bonus. He smiled…and he held her, thinking of the accuracy of her name. Arei…"barrier." She'd wanted to keep him out…and he'd been willing to give her that…but now….

She'd lowered it. For him….

He never thought she might…and right now, he was very content to have been proven wrong.