Chapter 14: Insight
Georgiana was a frequent visitor in Ashton Park even after the arrival of Lord Philip and Lady Isabella. Lady Isabella initially thought the young girl called on frequently to enjoy her company. She later realised that Georgiana favoured Elizabeth's company.
Elizabeth on the other hand understood that something was troubling Georgiana. She knew that her brother
forbid her from having any visitors. Elizabeth could sense that she loved her brother very much, but one moment her face lit up while talking about him, and the next moment there was a cloud of sadness engulfing her.
Something is troubling her for sure.
One evening, they sat in the parlour having tea. Elizabeth noticed the nature of the conversation between Lady Isabella and Georgiana.
"How come you did not accompany your brother, Miss Darcy? Were you not tempted to shop for the latest fashion there?" Lady Isabella asked, sipping her tea.
"I do not have much interest in shopping. Moreover, my brother wanted me to come back to Derbyshire." She said in a small voice.
Elizabeth could sense that Georgiana was uncomfortable with the topic.
Lady Isabella tried her best to converse with Georgiana. All the conversation she initiated was about their properties or connections in town. Within five minutes, Lady Isabella was frustrated by Georgiana's disinterest.
"I hope to see you soon." She said and headed upstairs.
Georgiana heaved a sigh of relief as Lady Isabella left the room. Elizabeth smiled sarcastically at Georgiana.
"Miss Smith, do not assume me to be arrogant. I am unable to enjoy conversations like these. Sometimes, it is very overwhelming." She said with guilt.
"Even someone who has spent merely a few minutes in your company would not assume you to be arrogant." She said, smiling.
"I am certain she thinks poorly of me."
"You answered all her questions with grace. Why would she think poorly of you?"
"To be honest, you are the only person I have felt comfortable talking to." Georgiana said gratefully.
"My brother would say I need to be more confident while conversing with acquaintances. But when they all talk only about materialistic things, or my brother's interests, I find it very uncomfortable."
"I can understand."
"Do not get me wrong. But I find you to be brave. I am sorry if this may hurt you. I do not know if I would even survive if I were in a situation similar to yours. My brother is my guardian, and he has kept me safe all these years. I am not even sensible enough to differentiate between good and bad. I admire you a lot. I am so glad to have met you." Georgiana said, with feeling.
Even though she mentioned Elizabeth's lack of family or connections, Elizabeth could sense how genuinely Georgiana was scared of the world.
"I have not always been brave. I think all of us have our flaws. Do not be too harsh on yourself."
Georgiana was silent.
"I can see that you love your brother a lot." Elizabeth said.
"I do. He has showered love and affection on me more than I deserve. My cousin Richard and Fitzwilliam share my custody."
She explained about her family and the death of her parents.
"But I cannot say I never experienced my mother's love. Lady Martha treats us like her own children. Without my brother in Pemberley, I have always found happiness in Ashton Park. Now that you are here, I am even happier."
Elizabeth smiled at her. Whenever she saw Georgiana, she remembered Mary.
The sisters wrote to each other often, but for both of them, it was very painful to be separated.
She learned from Mary that life in Longbourn was very chaotic.
Everyone has been concerned about your disappearance, especially Sir William. Papa and Mamma have spread the word that you left to live with aunt Gardiner. Do not misjudge them to be concerned about your reputation, Lizzy. They want to save themselves from disgrace. If they did reveal the truth, then they would have to explain why you chose to run away.
Mary's words echoed in her mind.
"Miss Smith?" Georgiana called out to Elizabeth.
"Oh! Yes, were you saying something?"
"I asked you whether you would like to come to Pemberley with me today. The children do not have lessons tomorrow, so you could stay for the night. I even asked Lady Martha, and she agreed."
"I do not think I can come. Maybe I can accompany Lady Martha sometimes when she visits you." Elizabeth said, not comfortable with the idea of visiting Georgiana in her estate.
She may want me to visit her, but her brother may not want an employee of Ashton Park to be in his home. I wonder why he has restricted her from having other visitors, except the Ashtons.
Georgiana pressed her many times, but Elizabeth denied her request.
After dinner, Georgiana returned to Pemberley.
A couple of weeks passed peacefully. Elizabeth was glad that Lord Philip did not neglect his children because of the newly married life. She noticed that the children were happier after the arrival of their father.
Lady Isabella hardly interacted with her. If at all she did, she had something to complain about. Elizabeth was aware that she did not expose her incivility when others were present.
One evening, Lady Martha sat along with Elizabeth in the drawing room.
"I am still waiting, my dear." She said.
"I do not understand, Madam."
"I am still waiting for you to come to me about the tough time my daughter-in-law is giving you."
Elizabeth smiled.
"Miss Smith, do not think I am oblivious to the hostility you have been experiencing from her. Why don't you say anything?"
"Honestly, it has not concerned me. Maybe, it is because I experienced far worse while I grew up in Hertfordshire."
"From your mother?"
"Unfortunately, yes!"
"Mrs Gardiner did tell me about the way you were treated there. Well, you are not in Hertfordshire anymore. In my house, I do not stand disrespect in any form. You are under my care, and I know you can handle the circumstances. But I am not going to allow it anymore."
"I presume you have already had a conversation with her." Elizabeth said, guessing.
"Yes, I did. This morning I expressed my thoughts on the matter quite firmly." Lady Martha said.
"Do not mistake me. But, I think you should have waited for me to raise it as a concern. More than concern about my welfare, I feel you used the situation to your advantage."
For the first time in the many weeks of staying in Ashton Park Elizabeth noticed displeasure on her employer's face.
"I do not understand you." She said bluntly.
"I am merely stating that you used her treatment towards me as an excuse to ascertain something that she already knows."
"And what might that be?" Lady Martha asked with composure.
"That you hold the ultimate power in Ashton Park." Elizabeth said.
She knew she was being brutally honest about her opinion on the matter.
To her surprise, Lady Martha laughed.
"You certainly know the art of angering someone one moment and making them laugh the very next, Miss Smith. Are you not happy that my daughter-in-law will be kinder to you going forward?"
"Madam, I have been employed to teach two wonderful children. I have my head and hands full with my responsibilities as a governess. If something is affecting my duty, I would never let it pass without informing you. According to me, Lady Isabella does not favor me as the governess. Maybe she doubts my capabilities. I would rather prove her wrong than waste my time by waging a war with her."
Lady Martha smiled at the maturity of Elizabeth at such a young age.
"You mentioned kindness, Madam. I do not know if I am invading your privacy, but if you feel Lady Isabella is not courteous with me, I feel you behave the same way with her." Elizabeth said, much to the shock of Lady Martha.
"You are indeed invading my privacy. I cannot think of anyone who has taken the liberty to criticise my behavior thus, except my late husband." Lady Martha said, looking keenly at Elizabeth. "You are not scared to profess your opinions. Are you, my dear?"
"Some say it is my failing. If I have displeased you now, then it is indeed."
"You are not wrong. As easy it is for my son to accept her as his wife, I struggle to do so."
"I can understand that all of you miss Lady Sophia. It is unfortunate indeed. But they are married now. You could have stopped their wedding in case you were totally against it. I am certain Lord Philip would not have gone against your wishes. Why did you approve of the match?"
"I did not. I never did."
"Oh!"
"I saw them in a compromising situation, some months after Sophia's death. I had no choice but to agree to the marriage." Lady Martha said helplessly.
Elizabeth realised why the old woman was unable to accept her daughter-in-law.
"The unexpected death of Sophia was too much for me to take. And within four months, he remarried. I am still furious that he chose her best friend out of the women in Derbyshire."
"Were they close?" Elizabeth asked out of curiosity.
"Oh yes! Sophia lived in an estate about fifty miles away. Lady Isabella was her friend since childhood. Philip was acquainted with both families even before he married Sophia. He convinced me that she would devote her time to the children. I don't see that."
"I personally feel it is too much to ask from someone. I was raised by someone who was not my actual mother. She could never love or accept me as her own. I don't think anyone can fulfill such an expectation." Elizabeth said, her thoughts wandering to days in Longbourn.
"You are too wise for your age, my dear. I still cannot believe your family treated you with cruelty."
"According to them, they have their reasons. I do not want to dwell on the past."
"But I am unable to. Her death haunts me to date. I have not even ventured to the stairs on the east side of the house. The way she lay unconscious there is still fresh in my memory."
"I am sorry."
"We had such a wonderful ball the previous evening. Everyone was here. My brother and his family joined us from Scotland. Fitzwilliam and Georgiana attended the ball as well. It was a merry event. We still cannot understand why she ventured to that side of the house. The stairs connect to the guest wing of the house."
"Were there a lot of guests?" Elizabeth asked, wanting to know the details.
"About four families stayed in the guest wing that night. Nobody heard or saw anything."
"Was Lady Isabella also invited to the ball?"
"Yes! Her family was friends of Sophia and they stayed in the guest wing as well."
Elizabeth somehow felt that Lady Sophia's death was not an accident. She suddenly realized that Lady Martha had shared something very personal with her. The very fact that she had earned her trust gave Elizabeth a lot of joy.
"You just made me realise something, Miss Smith." Lady Martha said.
Elizabeth looked at her inquisitively.
"Sophia was not just a good daughter-in-law, but she was my confidant in this house. I am certain that is why I am unable to imagine anyone else in her position. After a long time, my heart feels light in sharing my thoughts with you."
Elizabeth smiled when Lady Martha held her hands.
She felt a deep connection with her from the day she arrived at Ashton Park. She could not make out what it was. But she was happy that they were forming a strong bond.