Chapter 27: The Truth

Elizabeth did not know when it started, but she was in the middle of it before she realised she had deeply fallen in love with Darcy.

The moment she met him on the cliff was etched in her memory forever. His handsome face filled with surprise and concern for her.

She owed him her life. He has saved her without even knowing it. Her anger towards him in the bookstore was a reflection of her anger towards herself, as he reminded her of her cowardly act.

Later, when she met him in Ashton Park, she was surprised he did not use his status and friendship with the Ashton family to belittle or ruin her employment.

Each time she was in his company, she felt strangely comforted by his presence. She hated to admit the same, and the feeling terrified her.

The reason she wanted to avoid him was to keep her heart safe. She admired his affection and care for his sister. As days passed in his eyes, she could see the same affection towards herself. She deemed it impossible for a man of such status to have regard for her.

When he heard the story from her maid about the support he had extended for a ruined woman, she was touched. She wished her mother was supported the same way and was alive.

It took long for her to admit it, but she loved him in a short period. She fought hard to forget him, but it was impossible when she had to face him so often. Every night, she spent in turmoil. Day by day, she felt agitated even to hear the mention of his name. She wanted to confide her thoughts to someone.

The only person who ever knew about her love for Darcy was Mary. Since she knew she had fallen in love with him, she has written to Mary, confiding her innermost thoughts and dilemmas. Mary had replied to each of her letters. She was aware of everything happening between them during their acquaintance.

"…..Lizzy, why would you say it is wrong for you to love someone like Mr. Darcy? Since when did you care about society in terms of status and wealth? From his conversations with you I think you may not be alone in your feelings. You say he singled you out and asked for a dance. Help me understand why he would do that unless he wanted you to understand his heart. Why do you want to distance yourself from a respectable man who returns your sentiments? Do you think he cares about society? I do not think so. You deserve to be happy, Lizzy. Please do not let the past ruin your future. You did nothing wrong. Even if Mr. Darcy comes to know of the past, he will stand by you….."

There were several letters from Mary regarding this matter.

Just like Mary, in Elizabeth's heart, she knew that Darcy would never forsake her because of the truth about her past and birth.

Every look, every word, every act of his proved to her that he felt the same way about her. Despite repeatedly insulting him, and lying to him that she hated him, she could not stop herself from thinking about a life with him.

After the dance, she was certain he would never look at her. But that was not the case. All she could see in his eyes during the picnic was the same regard she had witnessed all those months. She was glad she would be away from Ashton Park for a month.

She had never expected him to walk in that morning and declare himself in such a way. Every word he spoke resonated from the depths of his heart.

Elizabeth was devastated for refusing him in such a way. But she had to. She had to end the matter there and convince Dary she could never accept him. The pain in his eyes was evident after her refusal. He looked aghast. His one look at her before he left made her heart hurt in a way it had never felt before.

Now, she sat in her room crying out of guilt.

She had not cared about her past and the fact that she was not born out of wedlock. But now it mattered. She loved Darcy deeply. She cared about his welfare. It was not just him; Georgiana's future was at stake too.

She knew the truth about her past would bring nothing but shame and distress to the Darcy family. She did not know how to face him again. She had wounded a man who loved and cared for her without any inhibitions about her status in society. All she wanted was to protect him. She knew she had done the right thing. And she vouched to herself that she would never tell him the truth. The truth that she loved him as much as he loved her.